The Psychology Of Compatibility | The Mel Robbins Show

[@Daniebklyn]

oh my gawd - that circle in square example just saved me extra hours in therapy.

[@Mariana-ud7dw]

Hahahahha

[@romonique7058]

I'm a 100% with you!

[@DJRenee]

🌟🌟🌟🌟

[@emilietije4836]

And she said it in less than 1 min

[@alitakovin6231]

The circle isn't also touched on every side. Its a half truth

[@sumaiasaif82]

Reminds me of this poem and illustration: "She had blue skin, And so did he. He kept it hid And so did she. They searched for blue Their whole life through, Then passed right by- And never knew." Masks, by Shel Silverstein

[@benjaminbecker8508]

Awesome. Awfully tragic.

[@wafaaansara7704]

This poem took me 5 yrs back and I shared it with him too 🙃

[@kipholder8577]

The whole video is spot on. Give this women (in red) a ted talk

[@solochica81]

Kip Holder thinking the same thing

[@gabbylikestowatchstuff]

YES PLEASE

[@MichelleChinMoYouStudios]

Absolutely. Everything was spot on. Very well articulated.

[@miG23458]

She has a fabulous Ted Talk: How to stop screwing yourself over. Highly recommend!

[@jojocluddy2534]

Yes!!!!

[@IndefiniChronicles]

This woman just helped me have more strength to actually wait for the right person.

[@linamarie84]

Yes! Girl you will get that right person!! It is sooo worth it in the end!! You are worth it!

[@LisaEverette]

Exactly me too!!

[@alexforce9]

If you are above 24, doing more than just waiting probably is the right idea.

[@moe808]

If waiting is your strategy, you will probably be waiting for a long time. Everything in life requires action with purpose.

[@jenndobrev9703]

Same

[@ugqueen]

The way she answers these questions! Fast and efficient 🤺

[@DaringDanielletravels]

Yeah, she’s spent a lot of time thinking about this

[@ugqueen]

Daring Danielle And it shows!

[@awatifana7154]

You know who is she?

[@alexisdavis7578]

Awatif Ana Spirit from “Love Goals” on OWN

[@benergy100k2]

Because she planned them ahead.

[@ChaseSizemore]

Who is this woman and why is she not credited?

[@jemzjems]

She is credited in the text below the video....her name is Spirit

[@TheSadie88]

jemzjems Spirit what? She has to have a full name and they didn't put it.

[@sherik233]

@@TheSadie88 She goes by just "Spirit." Easy to find her via Google.

[@liacharisma]

Chase Sizemore I wish her social media was linked

[@jemzjems]

@@TheSadie88 her full professional name is SPIRIT which as I said is credited. This is what she advertises herself as.

[@firefeethok_tui2355]

This woman seems Like she knows what the heck she’s talking about. Articulate smart easily answer the questions. Why can’t she be my therapist :-)

[@Sldindpunjab]

Maybe you can't afford her therapy :(

[@XXClodaghBXX]

She's great

[@firefeethok_tui2355]

Samantha Jones ?? No, its bc she is famous and super busy, and lives in another state.

[@clearaswater4424]

Yes!! Will she take my money and just HELP ME!

[@ArraysDataOrganizedSmartly]

Why would she not Articulate her words dumb ass 🤔

[@demigodcat]

This knowledge is pure liquid gold. This should be taught as prerequisite in graduating high school and a core class in all university level degrees. This might reduce 50% of the population's marriage divorces, bad relationships, unwanted hook ups and pregnancies.

[@Alexandra-uk4vr]

I wholeheartedly agree with you, sir.

[@RoyalBlood23]

Never gonna happen.

[@XXClodaghBXX]

Yessss 💯

[@vickyvale78]

Unfortunately it won't happen. Cause majority of people watching these videos are women. Men seem to think it's weak to seek counseling, not even relationship counseling but personal counseling. Although I know a few women who would benefit from this as well.

[@ladyshaw0698]

This is literally a BRILLIANT idea! I am about to do a school and I never considered adding anything like this to the curriculum, but I will, thanks to your brilliant suggestion. It will be part of the life skills portion of the curriculum. Thank you so much for sharing that thought.

[@lavienestpasunlongfleuvetr2559]

This woman's great! She definitely comes accross as someone at their best!

[@sydnitroy4423]

What is her name? She’s awesome!

[@judgeashley2347]

I played it over and over. Wanted to memorize everything she said.

[@judgeashley2347]

Spirit...you are awesome

[@teefrazier7248]

Omg! This woman done jumped in my marriage and exposed some stuff.

[@XXClodaghBXX]

Yes 😁

[@baghashvili]

This clarifies even more how people rush into long-term relationships and then feel miserable for years. Finding a compatible partner isn’t easy but everyone around us makes it seem like it..

[@Ava2969ny]

@baghashviii - people rush into long-term relationships because that's what they are taught to do. No wants to do the hard work of getting to know themselves before getting involved with someone, which is why so many people marry the wrong person. People rush into long-term relationships because they want to be taken care of, or rescued. As this woman on this video says, relationships give people an excuse not to show up in their own lives.

[@NicolineNDahl]

Holy smokes, that woman is so elegant and well-spoken. What a class act. She's goals :)

[@sylvietapos807]

Yes, she is.

[@helenasavels4509]

THE WOMANS NAME WAS NOWHERE MENTIONED. GIVE HER SOME CREDIT.

[@tanisha866]

Exactly I totally agree. Please share her name so we can follow more of her articles, videos and advice.

[@Aoneify]

Her name was in the video, it’s Spirit!

[@Aoneify]

She’s also the therapist on one of the reality relationship shows

[@vasht7976]

@@Aoneify was just about to say this.

[@sweets20062107]

Her name is spirit she has a show on own called love goals great show

[@gonzalezknicksnknacks4433]

One way compatibility.... "The Square and the Circle Analogy!!!!!" NOW that is an excellent way to describe compatibility.

[@shimag1992]

"Wound Mate" = Trauma Bond

[@LEXZAYful]

yes ! exactly what I was thinking

[@vanessatheebutterfly4625]

= toxic soul ties

[@ericlind6581]

Co dependency

[@victoriabaranik7686]

A wound mate - Could attract someone with narcisstic tendencies!

[@ellebelle6439]

Want to know something funny? I wore a red mask, my boyfriend wore a red mask. I thought hmm he's not really lilac like me but I'm drawn to him for some reason. Months go by and finally we both take off our red masks. We were lilacs all along and now we can see each other for who we really are and it's a beautiful thing. Sure we argue, sure our relationship has its ups and downs but I was so happy to take my mask off with him and brave the vulnerability together and we make ourselves stronger.

[@drita5038]

💜

[@xenniemarieesgana5393]

😍❤

[@yzma6142]

Wow beautiful

[@sincereiam]

A wound mate can also be a friend(s).

[@sabrina77769]

So true !

[@XXClodaghBXX]

Yes true

[@chicgal3]

Most Definitely!!!

[@arushrestha1122]

Just a friend...

[@Demodex21]

My former best friend for over 10 years turned out to be a wound-mate. :(

[@mariadla7]

She hit the nail on the head for me. I was with the wrong person for so long and now it makes sense.

[@virtuosityll7116]

Yeah! That ExPlains Why Every Time I Left My Ex, I Felt More Happier 😄 & fulfilled 😘

[@Lina-rf9nb]

Me too! I just realized why my 6 year relationship failed.

[@virtuosityll7116]

@@Lina-rf9nb Lolol Yeah & You Really Don't Wanna Admit To YourSelf That Maybe This Man May Not Be Compatible with Me, beCause After All, We've been Trying To Make It Work for 7 years, So We Keep Playing The Puzzle Game! But StiLL Something Just Still Not Fitting, I Can't Even Just Do A Romantic Dance With Him, Oh How I Miss Dancing 💃but you Knew He Couldn't dance That First Date Y'all had @ A Club, but You disregarded It As, Oh Well He Just Not Use To "Dancing" That Affected Sooo Much In Our Relationship 😧 It Turns Out, We Had Few Romantic Connections. 10 Years with Him, 3 kids, Later & While I Have No ReGrets, however I FeeL Like Nothing Was Accomplished Either, BeCause I Spent Too Much Time Trying To Make Him Understand That, First I Don't Want To Be In An Abusive Marriage & ReLationship!!! Or Should I Say, "Wounded" Couples Keep Coming Back To Each Other's Aid!! Wowww

[@Christifit406]

What were the first signs that made you realize that you were with the wrong person?

[@Lina-rf9nb]

@@virtuosityll7116 😂 And after you've put so much into it, you don't want it all to have been for nothing, and now you're forcing the situation, when YOU KNOW you're not compatible. I knew the first six months that it wasn't going to work. Somehow talked myself out of what I knew!

[@siobhanrachel2969]

The black powerful woman in red knows her shit! Thank you for this insight

[@dennisrobinson8008]

A supportive and mature minds as hers makes a better man

[@wellknown1204]

@@dennisrobinson8008 how about she invites the better man to her life instead of _making s better man_

[@dennisrobinson8008]

@@wellknown1204 Either way. If she invites a "better" man into her life and is ultra critical, negative and fault finding, it will degrade him.

[@alexaculver1033]

@@dennisrobinson8008 He wants a wound mate, will he bring out the mature positive determined intelligence in the woman? Or just what he can receive from the relationship?

[@mrchris6684]

Can you imagine being married to this woman and asking yourself on a daily basis am I measuring up lol. She’s absolutely gawjus I must say, very intelligent, well spoken. I wonder if she’s married and if so does she feel compatible with her husband.

[@selinagray1087]

I believe so. She has 9 kids I think.

[@broLuther]

@@selinagray1087 😂😂😂😂😂

[@natashashere]

She is and it shows that she’s at her best.

[@SG-kp5hi]

Yes she is married. N a Mother of 7 children i think

[@biancamichelle11]

Katrina M WTF? He literally said she was very intelligent and well spoken, last time I checked those are not superficial qualities. She is clearly on top of her game, that’s what he admires.

[@rosiehailu2221]

Wow the part when she said we all wear “mask” to hide our true self... that hit different. She’s so well spoken and spot on!

[@mimtenderness]

I love Spirit's warm energy and wisdom!

[@selenajackson1745]

Me tooo

[@XXClodaghBXX]

Me too 😍

[@mimtenderness]

@@XXClodaghBXX

[@natasharahil8240]

Just perfect answers. Sometimes we see all this red flags but afraid to live and start all over again...

[@monumentalmoments7757]

I love this woman's fairness to the game/art of compatibility

[@nowayjose23]

She forgot financial compatibility...the number 1 reason why relationships fail.

[@Lisa-tr3ou]

True

[@ericlind6581]

Great point. Also political compatibility...no way a Hillary supporter getting on with a Trumpster.

[@jessicatamele145]

Hi L A, i think that couples can get to that part if they do the quiz. The third question "do you have compatible lifestyle?" also applies to "do you like to go out for dinner, where, and can you afford to do it as much as you would like?" or maybe "you drive an expensive car, live in an expensive flat, can you afford it?". But i also think that its important to discuss this with open minds, and to know that even if money is the center of all it cant be the center of a relashionship.

[@PacificMoceans]

I'm transfinancial.

[@nowayjose23]

@@jessicatamele145 Do you have compatible lifestyles is NOT the same as do you have compatible money...and I beg to differ, most Americans live on credit and want...and have nice things with debt financing. They think they are 'affording' things by paying their cc bill every month.

[@stephanieCl]

This entire video is spot on and so deep. I wish she could navigate about changes in a couple as they are both growing as individuals and how it can affect their compatibility. Who is this woman, where can we find her please

[@rositapaulo7412]

Right now she works on the show Love Goals. It's truly impressive to see how she works and guides the couples.

[@chasingclouds7101]

What is her name?

[@heathab...._-_]

@@chasingclouds7101 her name is spirit

[@mirv1998]

Talk2Spirit on IG

[@heathab...._-_]

@@mirv1998 I also found her on Instagram spirit2talk, she has alot of motivational posts an she goes live on Friday's

[@diddyxgi]

“This woman” is absolutely incredible and you wont even say her name? Seriously what a shame! Who is she? What is her name?

[@americanbeauty171]

Here name is Spirit. She have a show called LOVE GOALS on OWN network....

[@tiphanidowner7114]

American cutie Thanks. God bless you🙏🏾✨

[@Evita05]

Same thought here. Not even a link to her so you can find more information 🤔🤔

[@SoffyLoves]

At around 2:42 her name appears. Her name is Spirit.

[@XXClodaghBXX]

Spirit I believe 😁😍❤️♥️

[@Thomas06992]

Melllll darling this lady is everything - keep her involved please

[@daintyapple]

Wow the best explanation of relationship compatibility. Now I don't feel bad anymore for cutting ties with the exes. We weren't compatible and it makes sense now. Find your tribe!

[@heathab...._-_]

I freaking love spirit so much she is so beautiful and Intelligent

[@emilietije4836]

She is really everything

[@samiraqurux.]

i love how she is calm and collected in answering

[@diannashuster5594]

This was such an eye opener for me! I've never heard anyone break it down so simply. Wonderful interview. I wish it was longer.

[@oscarwilliamson1264]

Dianna Shuster,your pretty smile can make the news!

[@LightBeingsBE]

I can’t believe it! I met a guy who him and I just totally hit all this levels over 3 meetings…. We haven’t gone to all the deep spaces yet… trust is developing…we haven’t revealed our “need them to know list” and haven’t shared any secrets…just building a solid friendship and he’s asked for exclusivity right away. ❤️

[@djari3s412]

Everything she's saying, right on the money. Love her spirit.

[@stefanysanchez2]

Btw, her name is also Spirit 😌

[@Gelobee98]

My exes failed in spiritual intimacy. It's hard to find someone who has the same views that you have.

[@sizwenxumalo3925]

Why want the same views in compatibility? Share the same spiritual inclinations, but views should different for learning to happen.

[@XXClodaghBXX]

Yeah :/

[@uduakudoffa52]

Ah, absence of spiritual compatibility is an up front deal breaker, dear.

[@ProudlyAfrican]

i love that red modest dress...nice talk from two grown women...

[@XXClodaghBXX]

Yes

[@ChristSaves88]

I would love to have a one on one conversation with Dr. Spirit. She’s so wise and knowledgeable!

[@lonnettascott]

So true!

[@kyndracrump]

One day very soon, I’m manifesting that I’m going to be a special guest on here. Make sure you all tune in.

[@miasministry07]

It is so

[@flooredjustfloored]

Believe you deserve it, and the Universe will serve it!

[@Demifan39]

Speak it so I be it! You will be there

[@kyndracrump]

floored JustFloored thank you! Whatever you want to do in life, your dreams will come true also.

[@kyndracrump]

Demifan39 thank you! No matter whatever you want to do in life, your dreams will happen also.

[@rebeccajones8628]

This expert is amazing. Every single sentence that came out of her mouth was full of wisdom and incite.

[@BrothaNeo]

Now THIS is some serious real deal information that EVERYONE who wants to be in any form of relationship should be aware of! Most of the information Spirit shared is new to me lol! Thank you for this video! I needed it!

[@gierk27]

She has so much wisdom. I have worn the red mask when I'm truly a lilac before and my needs never got met. I've decided not to let my representative show up, I want to show up as my real self so I connect with my compatible mate

[@santran9602]

Does this woman have a book omg 😳 I want to buy

[@EB-sl2dd]

RIGHT

[@oscarwilliamson1264]

San Chan,you look stunning 🌹🌹🌷🌷

[@MorningMindfulness]

Her KZbin channel is called Women of Impact for anyone wondering. She’s amazing

[@madgemackles4337]

So the first step is to find out who you are. This was a good outlook on things

[@Nathiofficial]

Her name should be in the title! This is amazing

[@shomavyas3646]

She explained compatibility so well! The concept is so clear to me now. I would love to hear more from this relationship therapist!

[@jam-1001]

The circle and the square… explained it all. Such clarity after 30 years…. I understand now. I was the square, for 30 years. Lesson learned. Never to be repeated. Thank you Dr. Spirit.❤

[@Dazzlin826]

She's so pretty and confident!

[@michelleselman8004]

Oh my God! Dr Spirit is everything! And more! Mel your brilliant questions is a masterful!

[@cristinay9950]

I’m blown away at her explanations!! This made so much sense. She is brilliant

[@chinarain1]

WOW! I am sitting here like mind-blown.

[@realtalktina]

The therapist was very helpful wish she was my therapist!! Also is there a man who covers all those areas and is still available?? Wow!

[@KA-ui3sm]

Holy moley! That analogy of lilac personality vs red mask is so spot on!! It all makes so much sense! And circle in a square description and her definition of intimacy = “into me see”. That was profound!!!!Spirit is amazing! She described this is in such relatable but poignant ways. This was one of most enlightening vids I’ve seen in a long time! Thank you!

[@sf5823]

Intimacy = in to me see! 3:24 Such a good analogy, I'm going to see people that way from now on! It looks red but it's really lilac. Signs of compatibility. 5:36 Choose Ascension = some rise , some fall but you want a relationship that RISES R - Recreational intimacy I - Intellectual intimacy S - Spiritual intimacy E - Emotional intimacy S - Sexual intimacy

[@NA-vt6mz]

And guy I was with didn’t fit any of those !!!

[@Kiki-jx6by]

I like to look at it this way; If we can’t be friends, it’s going to be hard to be a couple. Great video, I shared it

[@ersofrescht4661]

Im happy learning this. Wound mate made many sense to me

[@meimei1919]

I’m awe struck by this woman! Had I seen this before I married, I’d (still ) be married to the right man that I would have chosen correctly.😢😪

[@SandraWAsumu]

Uhm... she took me completely off guard ...!! Her examples, analogies and entire communication skills are A M A Z I N G

[@jam-1001]

Failed the compatibility quiz miserably 😂 This lady just changed my life!!!

[@sertacsilbastan]

Brilliant interview and brilliant responses. I'm amazed that finances weren't included in this, and it makes me believe that financial differences can be overcome. I wish more people knew what it takes to have a healthy relationship. Also, to all those people who read this, I hope happiness and hope surround you even in the darkest moments. You deserve to be loved and sometimes science can't explain the reasons why you're happy. Don't question your happiness when that happens.

[@admw1986]

Red and lilac-spot on. O M G.

[@astridmelodie4056]

OMG She is completely right!!! Waoo she talk about different type of intimacy.

[@ShanaChow]

So amazing!! ❤️

[@clairevernyuy5827]

Doctor spirit you are AMAZING ❤❤

[@beautylife310]

Both ladies are great, sure the therapist is no doubt the expert in the field, but the host is also excellent with all spot on questions, brilliant to watch...All signs just confirmed that I was right to leave ex, wish I could know these earlier....

[@xxForestetxx]

I love her 😍 I love how she speaks I love her thought process and how she describes things makes so much sense!!

[@xxForestetxx]

Anyone know if Spirit has a book out??

[@JacquelineVerellen]

I love that you are ACTUALLY doing the talk show, that you talked about doing in your decade challenge. Its only been the first few months and you are off to an amazing start :) Thanks for inspiring me Mel.

[@victorz1602]

I have never heard about her name before but she is one of the best out there, Tech talk please👏👏

[@nyaworld]

this video has literally changed my life. the way I was screaming yaaaaasss after every answer wow. thank you thank you

[@jenniferhergert4447]

"Feeding each other" I love that concept!

[@3clr134]

Omg 😯 if I knew this 18 years ago I would have called my wedding off to the person I’m now trying to divorce😒

[@ST-cj5gm]

I empathise with you. That’s a really long time to spend with someone who doesn’t contribute to your happiness.

[@joymorris3004]

I’ve been married for 15 yrs and I don’t really think we’re all that compatible. I mean we’re just opposite with EVERYTHING!!! It makes me wonder sometimes if we should have gotten married to begin with

[@oscarwilliamson1264]

Joy Morris,you deserve a better man!

[@WalkerRocker1]

I feel like having a long conversation with her. She’s sooo Wow! 💝

[@tawlaq]

Ms. Spirit has studied to show herself approved! Her gift shall make room for her on any platform. She articulates and explained aspects of relationships that really enlightened me. Thanks Mel.

[@myahill7475]

Another Queen Mother amongst us, preach... And Mel looks great! This show is wonderful. Two beautiful woman working to heal us.

[@RoRo-mj8nc]

This lady just gave me the push that I needed to break up with my boyfriend and to end the toxic cycle for good. He's a good person, but not good for me.

[@sunshine2049]

Why isn’t her name mentioned? Does anyone know? She is better than most therapist

[@christinawilliams008]

Her name is Spirit. She has a show on OWN called Love Goals.

[@chanT2424]

Spirit

[@michellekalski8823]

Spirit is amazing . She has a gift of articulating ideas so clearly and with such insight.

[@oscarwilliamson1264]

Michelle Kelski,hope you are in a better relationship!

[@kimberlyrosssegovia203]

This interview was life changing! Thank you so much! You've given me a lot of priceless information about myself and about the people in my life. I have to take some time to absorb all of this so that I can reevaluate many area's in my life. Most importantly, to pass it on to my adult children and my grandchildren. You not only saved me, you may also have saved my children and my grandchildren. Thank you Thank you Thank yoy

[@barbaracl6308]

Wow, I’m speechless. I must listen to this over and over...

[@dannyllawrence8023]

Hello to whom it may concern love is worth fighting for... There is someone who helped me get my ex back within few days 💟💟💟💟

[@dannyllawrence8023]

Contact via whtsApp 💟💟💟

[@dannyllawrence8023]

//+(2348156896436) ///:💟💟💟

[@camilleandriette]

These answers were so informative! Makes you rethink relationships.

[@hankhill2698]

I appreciated the interviewer. A little eager at times but generally willing to allow the speaker to answer and build off of their thoughts.

[@ladawnwarren8570]

This Lady is awesome she knows her stuff!! Would like to know where I can find her 😀

[@valmercado4682]

she is the definition of elegance my god

[@NallahBrown]

“Wound mate” woooow. That’s a good one Spirit!!!!

[@sylvietapos807]

That therapist is so gorgeous!!!

[@mekmek1000]

Spirit is amazing. She is one of the best relationship therapist ever.

[@lizzomso8816]

Yep compatibility is the key to a good relationship

[@belsiak]

Wow! I found myself an answer to my life. Now I know on how to manifest a new relationship that I should have.

[@tiffanybrown1001]

I think I heard this on the radio, and then it was gone. So glad I found this on KZbin.

[@nomathembadzinotyiwei8077]

Compatibility Quiz Do you miss your partner when you’re away from them for along time ? Do you trust your partner ? If not, why not? Do you have compatible lifestyles? Can you talk to your partner about anything Do you laugh together?

[@poeticlovee]

Thank you

[@americanbeauty171]

Thank you

[@juneofspades2374]

The answer is no

[@pipsterr__]

@Emily Redford 😂😂😂

[@XXClodaghBXX]

Great thank you

[@Deen1223]

What an intelligent woman , this is the kind of food human need in their soul. She speaks more truths than my pastors .

[@cheropmercy1730]

😂 very true

[@auspiciousj]

I like how she use the color analogy.❤🌈

[@timmorakinyo3384]

Our conditioning from our parents growing up which we tend to carried on throughout life, also we get what we project out.. our emotions ,feelings and our state of being is bi-directional.

[@larihair7531]

What's the therapist name? Why is she not tagged? Or her name in the caption?

[@mirv1998]

@Talk2Spirit on Instagram

[@twanay1876]

Lari Hair did u find out her name

[@julzradiance]

It came up on the screen, her name is Spirit.

[@twanay1876]

Julie thank u

[@ithamorarowe4269]

That’s the exact same question I asked

[@novemberPrincess1109]

You can marry someone with little to no compatibility but you don’t submit yourself to that person unless you are emotionally connected. This video is a perfect blueprint for compatibility in a healthy marriage. This lady in red talks real. One of the best podcast from Mel Robbins. Cheers!

[@blessingsbest6838]

I can’t express how amazing this information is. Wow! Wow! Wow! Thank you 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾

[@Zeek509]

She is so well-spoken and articulate its not even funny. Her illustrations were spot on and well delivered. 👏🏾

[@guitaro5000]

3:28 "we walk out and we wear masks all day everyday" You had no idea. Lol

[@bravebird4553]

Wow! My ex husband was not a soulmate...he was a wound mate. Brilliant. 8 years and today I finally get it

[@dejager35]

Where can we see more of Spirit's work?

[@nettaskymusic4461]

dejager35 question of the day

[@brandi-janaicarter3862]

She is on the OWN network with a TV show

[@rositapaulo7412]

Love Goals

[@Luckykat218]

I love Spirit’s way of no nonsense type of advice & assessment of bad behaviors. She’s amazing!