How Society Tricks Young Women - Jordan Peterson

Watch the full episode here - • Jordan Peterson - The ...
Dr Jordan B. Peterson reacts to 50% of women being childless by 30. ONS has recently released data saying that 50.1% of women haven’t had children by age 30. Why does Jordan Peterson think that women are having fewer and fewer children? Why are women having children later in life? Does Jordan Peterson think that population collapse is imminent?
#jordanpeterson #birthrate #dating
-
Join the Modern Wisdom Community on Locals - modernwisdom.l...
Listen to all episodes on audio:
Apple Podcasts: apple.co/2MNqIgw
Spotify: spoti.fi/2LSimPn
-
Get in touch in the comments below or head to...
Instagram: / chriswillx
Twitter: / chriswillx
Email: chriswillx.com...

[@ChrisWillx]

Watch the full episode with Jordan - kzbin.info/www/bejne/opK2fGqGrc1jlZo Get my free Reading List of 100 life-changing books - chriswillx.com/books/

[@wallywooyeah1]

@@mosesking2923 What a terrible person

[@gracielchiu]

I was childless at age 58, when my partner of 20 years suggested children. I worked and was fine not having kids. He was age 60 and organized the birth of twins by egg donor/carrier. So, I raised my 13 year olds from birth at a late age, experiencing both states of womanhood in my lifetime. I would say childless women may be happier, have time for opportunities for self-expression, and lead more interesting lives. But, I deeply love my children and cannot deny that the experience is profound, my understanding of life broadened, and am a less selfish person as a result.

[@wallywooyeah1]

​@@gracielchiu Sounds Ace, older parents have a richer comprehension of the pitfalls their children can face, which has to be benificial

[@isander1]

You tease you 😂

[@joegreene7746]

@@Josh-tf9cr I understand his point, however I don’t think Christ himself would hope for tragedy in hopes of growth. The issue is “hoping” for bad things to happen. Obviously pain and suffering allow for growth but I personally think it’s better to hope they recover instead of hoping they deal with consequences.

[@TajimaMunenori]

I was raised by a narcissistic woman and I find that I meet too many narcissistic women. I'm great believer that "All children deserve parents, but not all parents deserve children." My greatest fear is to be trapped in loveless marriage and the children are the collateral damage.

[@Slavkleos]

That doesn't excuse ending your own bloodline like a dumbfuck.

[@LucareonVee]

@@Slavkleos Bloodlines don’t matter. 😋

[@selrox879]

Same goes for women.

[@Riddler-wt4nc]

❤️

[@pastelmoon9118]

agreed! it`s awful and difficult to even see how wonderful family can be when your first, important years were ruined by family. Nowadays you dont wanna deal with any of that shit would prefer option what guarantee: peace, no stress and anxiety all the time. Just saying pls do what you think its best for you. You know yourself better than anyone

[@kateredhead7334]

I am a woman, aged 60, never married, no children. For me it was the right decision, it is the lifestyle that suits my personality. That being said, I encouraged all the young women who have worked for me through the decades, to remember that what they had was a job and only a job. We were all disposable at work. If what they wanted was a marriage, children and a family then they should save their money, plan ahead, find someone who they loved and respected and hand me their notice when they were ready to start their family. I could always replace staff. Their family could never replace them. Women fought for the right to choose our destinies. Wanting to be a wife and a mother is a fine choice and a service to our communities.

[@longnguyen9839]

Wonderful sentiment. Your staff were lucky to have you

[@tellercyde]

Women didn't "fight" for squat. You complained a lot in the streets. Hardly storming Iwo Jima.

[@chgenerationx]

@@tellercydeyou alright dawg?

[@sup9542]

​@@tellercyde I agree that it has always been innate in men to give their lives to women and want to please them so no real fighting was needed. But no need to argue about that in this thread which has nothing to do with that.

[@thelordz33]

Sounds like cope and backward rationalizing.

[@duckshepherd]

I thought the lack of children had more to do with people simply not being able to afford children given the current state of the economy? People in the newer generations can't keep up with inflation, outrageous medical costs, rising housing costs, all alongside student debt. My partner and I consciously decided not to have kids for this reason alone, despite the fact we'd like to. We just can't afford it, even in our 30's. Edit: We just had one child recently and are looking to grow our family, but our 830 sqft home can't accommodate. We decided to not have a 2nd kid since we can't afford a new house with the current housing prices. I guess economics strikes yet again. Edit #2: My partner and I are now divorced due to financial hardship straining our marriage after having a kid. She wanted to be a stay at home mom, but it wasn't possible on one teacher's income. Suffice it to say this ultimately drove a wedge between us. I feel so angry and frustrated. I hate this economy.

[@ak2944]

that sounds terrible :( are you located in the USA?

[@nancybatch7007]

My experience (60+ mother & grandmother) is that we can always find a way to afford the things that really matter to us. So unless you are truly destitute, don't let a modest income or lifestyle stop you from becoming a parent. I can recall some pretty lean times raising my son and yet I have never once regretted it. We always found a way and he turned out very well.

[@joyandpeacefullaughter5307]

Jordan peterson is very biased and traditionalist in these aspect and can only see one view when it comes to child bearing despite the fact that he prides himself on being open minded. Sometimes I pity his wife. He's one of those people who is so used to being the smartest person in the room, he becomes closed minded to external perspective on things.

[@Encovelicus]

funny how poor people have more kids

[@natsumiyumiko9644]

@@nancybatch7007 That is a disgusting way of encouraging people to raise children in povery.

[@N3RV001]

I’m 32, and as are my friends. None of my friends have children. My girlfriend, one that lasted 7 years, did not want children. And for the most part everyone’s reason seems to be general overwhelm and instability in the world. The ones that make enough money to feel like they could support a kid, are too busy working. And I think covid pushed people off the fence that were on the fence.

[@kingsolomega]

That is a sad state of affairs. They basically scared and lied to people and convinced them not to have children. People have lost sight of the future and leaving their family a legacy. No sense of honor and duty anymore. No idea of sacrifice for the greater good or country. Businesses and corporations have tricked people into working themselves to death and not having anything or anyone for their elderly years. Wow what a sad state of affairs. People with no concept of having grandchildren like they were blessed to have grandparents. The ugly side of capitalism is killing off generations.

[@TmoneyBagz1]

So true.. the cost of living also has went up sooo crazy. Especially if you live in a major city. Back when your parents were young, they could just move out and get a “regular job” and be able to hold down a 1 bedroom by themselves, even with not the best job. But at least have a stable place of their own until they get to the point where they can get a better job/career and then a better place. You would even be able to have a girlfriend, have a kid, have an apartment on your own, with a regular job back then. You cannot do that anymore in this society. It’s not that simple anymore. The “American Dream” has changed, the whole structure has changed. People don’t even want the American dream anymore nor does America push that rhetoric anymore. This is the new world that we live in. NWO.

[@ModeratelySpeaking]

Ohh, I fell hard from the American cedar fence.....

[@overcastfriday81]

That's a good point. Also, you can take out a 30 yr mortgage and 9 months later your employer says "we are going in a new direction. your job is no longer needed". Point being, employers have no problem sacking people with less than 2 years on the job, regardless of productivity. I even knew an employee ask his boss if it was safe to buy a house and relocate, and the boss said yes, and he still got laid off within a year. He didn't even want to live in that city. The boss did not have any discretion about the layoff.

[@CesarNostradamus-wj9uq]

Personally if that’s how they feel then they shouldn’t be having sex.

[@TheEmpress185]

Some women don't have children because simply they don't like them.The choice for a woman not wanting children and being aware of it helps preventing toxic parenting and mistreating children who in adulthood would bear deep emotional scars.It's not always about career,it can be a clear and simple conscious choice.

[@melanieb2132]

Many people don't like children who aren't their's. Also, the way western society treats children makes them intolerable to be around

[@italiantraditionalcatholic2390]

What a self-indulged cop out..

[@intrigue8664]

@@italiantraditionalcatholic2390 No such thing. No one owes you children you will never see or contribute to. You're selfish because you impose on others.

[@abrajean9634]

@@italiantraditionalcatholic2390 I have cousins in another state (USA) who are Catholic and they are early thirties. Most Catholics I know are (sorry) full of shut because they don't follow any of the rules but will insist that they are going to heaven. Blah blah blah. I barely know these cousins, but I heard they adopted a crack baby -- worked through the issues -- and then 3 months later, another unwanted newborn they heard about. If you're going to make me listen to your Catholic bs, then at least be like my cousins -- adopt crack babies and then we'll talk. I really admired them practicing what they preach. Rare.

[@RealThisisA]

Thank you.

[@sugicasugarac686]

As a preschool teacher I can tell you that 9/10 people would be better off never becoming a parent. It is just not for everyone and thats ok. I don't understand why some people get pushed into parenthood with no education, poor as all hell, anger issues, drinking problems...They have no idea what to do with a child so they take them to the kindergarten all day, take them home and put them to sleep. Don't be afraid not to have kids. These are not the ye old days. You should be happy to live like you want to. It can be with a baby and/or a job you like.And please don't think a baby will fix a crappy life or a crappy relationship. Young girls be smart, do better.

[@kalilavalezina]

Thank you.

[@kimwarner1681]

Exactly. That band aid baby or the golden goose. I have known 2 women that purposely got pregnant to get out of going to work or doing something they don't want to have to do. They lied to their boyfriend and the other one lied to her husband, went off the pill, didn't tell him and jumped on him when she knew she was ovulating. What gets me is their vile, manipulative plan works. They get pregnant no problem and get out of whatever it is they did not want to do. Yet, there are many women who would love a baby and plan on a baby because they actually want one, never use him or her as a pawn in their pathetic life and they cannot get pregnant to save their lives. I will never understand that one.

[@lauravergot9995]

Going by your number than 90% of parents are drunks, druggies and psychos.... Which is plainly not true unless you live in a bad neighborhood. In which case your numbers are not representative. If you argument with numbers, give us the courtesy of using accurate data.

[@kalilavalezina]

@@lauravergot9995 you’d be shocked how common child abuse is these days.

[@YELLOW08Z06]

It’s called discipline!! No one has the discipline in the heat of the moment to use protection so most of us were accidents.

[@sei_anoi]

I came from Eastern Europe, where most children grow up in dysfunctional families. The typical father is alcoholic, violent, unfaithful to his household unemployed wife. Many of my friends (including me) choose to pursue a career and gain financial independence first before thinking about marriage. So if we ever end up in a scenario as our mothers have, we could leave the broken marriage and spare our children of the trauma we've suffered as children. Choices for the career first and later marriage (or no marriage at all) came from poor father/daughter relationships, which lead to deep untrust/fear towards men and marriage in general.

[@Elle-ht3km]

Good for you, Eastern European men are all over Ireland and they're really horrible to even us native women who pay taxes to give them free housing. They're really aggressive too

[@daybyday3840]

damn speak for yourself. Calling every Slav dysfunctional.

[@sstudyambiente]

Thank you for putting this in. I am from a middle eastern family and I am a witness of how my mother is being patient with my father, who mentally abused the entire family for more than a decade. I see this in 90% of my relatives relationships as well. Unfortunately it is a cultural thing for many, that the wife is a mother and is not independent and has no other choice than staying with a crazy husband ( it also happens to be the other way around, but this video is about women). You never know how things go, so it IS important to get at least a decent education so that you can have a secure job to survive, if things go totally wrong. But I still want to finish my studies because it is my highest interest to be a scientist and can't wait to become a mother one day!

[@sstudyambiente]

@@BOZ_11 excuse me, so if a man is totally unhappy with his wife after a couple of years, how is it then? „ well, he married her“? You never know people 100%, we don’t even know ourselves. And especially in other cultures, you don’t get the chance to „try“ someone first as it is in western countries. People most likely think that people all over the world have the same freedom in choosing their partners the way it is in western societies.

[@silverfox6883]

Smart men are walking away from whamen and marriage big time now, so don't worry. Enjoy your career and cats ...

[@CrissyDuarte]

I had my first child at 27. And then my second at 31. I will tell you. All my energy that I put in my career developing and leading people was simply me acting out my maternal urges. Urges that were subconscious. Once I had children. My job has since become an irritant. I loved my career. Now I despise how high I’ve climbed. I’m currently looking to demote. My kids overwhelmingly bring me more joy than anything.

[@LeonMerk123]

Achievement unlocked: get creampied (twice)

[@Benny_B0O0]

The world needs more moms like you. Too many children growing up with parents prioritizing work. When their real life’s work is getting neglected, the child

[@CrissyDuarte]

@@Benny_B0O0 I always tell my kids they are more important than my job. But I don’t think having employment equates to neglect. Neglectful mothers will be neglectful regardless of being unemployed or not. The key is that my childrens development and needs come first. Should my job ever come in the way of that, the kids come first. However I know plenty of neglectful mothers who have ever had a job.

[@Susan13554]

And then you woke up

[@chriscoll6493]

Lovely. Your husband is a very lucky man. Made my day. Thank you.

[@tiana4102]

I'm 28 and I'm so tired already without even having kids. Having kids would literally destroy me.

[@hG21509]

Same 😅

[@philla8916]

yeah riding the cockcarussel must be exhausting

[@duncanhewitt6557]

Having a child is the best thing you can have in the world.

[@LucareonVee]

@@duncanhewitt6557 I’d rather have my trips to Japan. 😋

[@pepehands5510]

It's not for everyone. But, think about the topic enough to the point where you know you won't regret your decision in the future

[@terryroth2855]

Now if more kids could have fathers, than we would have something.

[@GavinMichaels]

Well said. I know Jordan is emphasizing the positives of having a kid here (sorta) but it’s such a huge risk for a variety of reasons, and one is you can easily end up a single mother and if you don’t have that established career, you’re going to be fucked. Especially if you’re in the US where we tend to demonize single motherhood

[@dude2410]

@@GavinMichaels The us tends to "demonize" single motherhoods?!?! are you out of your mind? the us is probably one of the places that pushes for single motherhood the most, saying things like "you don't need a man", "women can do it all" and other bullocks.

[@abrajean9634]

@@GavinMichaels Exactly. Well stated.

[@GavinMichaels]

@@dude2410 Compared to other developed countries, we do demonize them. Look at other developed countries and the benefits they have for single mothers, and compare it to the US. The fact that "welfare mom" is an insult for many conservatives is telling. It doesn't mean we have ZERO programs to help single motherhood, but it means we've got a long way to go. And it makes single motherhood such a huge risk in the US. Also I think you're taking the phrase "you don't need a man" to mean that women don't need a partner in marriage, where (at least when I've seen it used) it's in reference to women having self-respect without feeling like they need to be hitched (without a child that is) when the norm for so long was if you're not married by such and such age, you're a failure, embarrassment etc.

[@jennytaylor3324]

That's the REAL problem. Well said.

[@haroldmerewether1224]

But also our society isn't a child rearing society it's a work work work society. It's too fast paced and expensive to live.

[@kw5961]

@Pedro Ortega It's truly absurd.

[@kurtpunchesthings2411]

@Pedro Ortega the real scary thing Pedro the Global Elites who run us ? they don't need 7.7 billion people to rule this planet they can easily lose 7.2 Billion and would be fine with just half a billion people so they are not worried about Population decline they will always have enough supply of cheap labor

[@whatisahandle221]

The wealthiest people have: -lower taxes on their primary income of wealth & sources: capital gains, dividends, and inheritance -(through corporate positions or ownership) extreme political power through lobbyists, ownership of capital, and control over workers (Eg how much peer pressure gets applied for people at your office to vote for pro-business interests?)

[@jacobdyer9164]

The lifestyle of women now don’t want to get married. That is not the problem. The problem is that these same women will have children out of wedlock.chosing boys who are easy on the eyes and not young men who can be responsible. the biological fathers do not care or do not know because it’s a one time fling. So, they turn their attention to young men who at one time wanted them. These young men want nothing to do with them. Because it’s not their responsibility. These women had their chance and blew it. Now they want to prey on any simp to help them

[@jamestrent-nw9zb]

I know, it's terrible...Freddo Chocolate Frogs have gone up 46% since the danpemic...awful.

[@user-kg5lq6nd7q]

Just because you CAN doesn’t mean you HAVE to !

[@brianterence3211]

But it can mean you should do.

[@user-kg5lq6nd7q]

@@brianterence3211 …. No

[@user-kg5lq6nd7q]

@@brianterence3211 free will is a thing

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

​@@brianterence3211 It doesn't mean you should

[@LucareonVee]

@@brianterence3211 Doesn’t mean you have to or should. 😋😘

[@janedo-re-mi2738]

Some women simple don't wanna risk ending up as single mothers, struggling to take care of and financially provide for children on their own.

[@timtibbetts4193]

Fair point but the bitterness and hostility within your answer is very detectable. Having grown up my entire childhood as one of three children being raised by a single mother, I understand the difficulties of such a situation. And, I, like many others, am disturbed with the percentage of non-present fathers, so it is understandable why for many women have their guard up. For everyone wanting to build a family, finding a proper Partner is not easy. Moreover, once a potential Partner is found, developing and maintaining the relationship long term is incredibly challenging. But, my ultimate advice is, even with all of this considered, not to stop trying. While children do grow up in a family with a single mother due to the father choosing not to be around, there is another significant factor that contributes to the number of single parent homes. Many people in relationships nowadays, men and women alike, do not try nearly hard enough to overcome obstacles and challenges with the appropriate level of determination to stick together. People throw in the towel much too quickly. And, this comes mostly at the expense of the children. People need to have the fact consistently reinforced that having and raising a child will add that much more challenge to any relationship, which is normal, but with the appropriate efforts and cooperation, a happy and loving family is not just possible, but necessary and endlessly rewarding. But, too many people are forgetting that once a relationship involves a child, the responsibility for both parents to maintain the relationship grows tremendously. The situation mostly stops being about the parents and both parents have an obligation to the child to maximize their efforts towards cooperation and maintaining a healthy relationship and household. Ultimately, I share all of this because, while there is merit to your comment, its tone indicates that you may have had relationships or other experiences that have caused your hesitation and aggravation with trying to build a relationship and family. But, it is important to try your best to recover and keep trying when you are able. It is true that, with three children and a single mother in the household, our family struggled a lot growing up. Yet, my mother undoubtedly considers here children to be her top accomplishment and she has always made it clear that her love for her children fulfill her happiness and keep her heart beating. While all women do not need to feel that same way, it only makes sense that having children is a top priority for many women and can be one of the most rewarding aspects of their lives. So, despite all the challenges of our time, and all of the risk involved, the reward involved is worth it. And if it helps, it is still the case that many men desire to build a happy family as well. So, while I can understand why women can feel hesitant and defeated at times following difficult relationships or other challenges, I always consider it worth it to take the necessary time and steps to recover from bad relationships, or other experiences, as needed, then always keep looking forward. For anyone willing to put in those consistent efforts, the reward is possible and of incomparable value.

[@Megan-19]

This is what people don't get. I've seen so many women give up careers to be wives and moms and them get cheated on and left by their husband's. I will never give up my career and will always be financially independent because I'm not losing that to conform to what society keeps telling me I should do.

[@janedo-re-mi2738]

@@Megan-19 exactly. Even if I do ever get married, I'll always make sure I have an income so I'm not screwed if I become widowed or divorced.

[@rejectionistmanifesto8836]

Many women end up having children with the expectation that the man will provide and society pressures him to be the breadwinner for life or looks at him in disgust. On the other hand women are pressured to have children but many guys could be violent, or cheaters or abusive to you/children. A lot of people should not be parents.

[@derekblattenberger2878]

@@Megan-19 if you don't want a husband or children, that's on you and it's perfectly fine. However, you make up only a small percentage of women who don't want a husband or children. He's talking about majority of these women will be miserable or full of regret when they exceed beyond the age of childbearing. Also, my mom was a single mother of 5 children and all 5 of us came out perfectly fine. She doesn't regret having any of us and all of us are glad we were born, even with being a single mother. There's nothing attractive about feminism and Jordan spends quite a bit of time dismantling it on a regular basis

[@theresagrano9711]

As a single mother if it were not for my career I would have been homeless as having a child is expensive. Unfortunately for me I bought into the concept that my husband would stay and provide for us, which now I realise was delusional. A woman should be financially independent.

[@SabzKhumalo]

That is the best point out of the motherhood conversation. All women should be financially independent before getting married and having kids, society today is not conducive to stay at home parents

[@tessamarie8698]

exactly and all these men fighting for old gender roles are delusional

[@KSHITIJA_SAMANT]

@@thereisnosanctuary6184 It was always broken

[@Swiss_Cynic]

@@lukegibson9410 Wait so are you saying if i make a child with a woman and then just fuck off, its the womans fault alone?

[@flannelpillowcase6475]

@@Swiss_Cynic yes, that's what he's saying. with the rise in gender equality also comes a rise in subjugation. a lot of men are extremely insecure and triggered by the fact that women are empowered to do what they want now instead of being forced to get married and become baby factory live-in maids. let's just hope society continues to slide in the direction of equality rather than back into female slavery.

[@pegah9413]

22 years of education and in the last year of my PhD in STEM field, I realized I was missing a big time My husband and I decided to have a child despite it being a very bad timing for me. But I realized the "right time" never seem to come. There is always something more to do, a paper more to publish, one more internship to go to, look for job post graduation, get the job and try to promote your rank as a newbie to get a fair salary, try harder because now you have even more responsibilities at hand in a senior role, etc, etc. I just figured I have to just draw the "stop" line somewhere and get back to my life. Now two months pregnant and I feel I just opened a new chapter in my life. I am scared, that is true. In my field, a few years away from market means you lose all your value, you turn into a useless old car. I have thousands of doubts about my future as a career woman, but one thing I never doubt; I am not gonna regret this. I just wish world was a bit kinder to women like me who decide to juggle the heck out of this seemingly "lose-lose" game.

[@longnguyen9839]

Good luck. That is not an easy decision. I truly hope it works out for you ❤️

[@joshy2joshy]

It's very commendable to take the route that to me, appears the more difficult one. You've done well, but every choice has a sacrifice.

[@lucydoe1334]

You made the right decision. I had my first child at 35 and second at 37- they bring more joy and meaning to my life that I have never imagined was possible. I have experienced an unexpected renaissance in my midlife.

[@joshy2joshy]

@@lucydoe1334 Glad it worked it out for you :)

[@josiahwyncott7519]

I don't think there is a special brand of cruelty for women who prioritize children, it is just the reality of economics. Everyone wants to get the most productivity they can manage. Men become 'disposable' and lose value in a workforce too. But because we can abuse our bodies for a longer period of time, it is different.

[@dimitristripakis7364]

Do NOT do it if you don't feel it.

[@indridcold8433]

Exactly, it does not effect anybody else, where we choose to reproduce or not, except the child being born into this hellhole of oppression and hate. But, if someone three kilometers from me chooses to have children, it will not effect me in the slightest. If they choose not to have children, it still does not effect me. I chose to not reproduce because I am not making more tax slaves for the wealthy-elite politicians and corporate zombies. I just can not be that selfish. However, this effects nobody but me and the politicians and corporations, which I care nothing for them.

[@afrofaeries]

It’s that simple

[@christianb.4726]

these feelings were manufactured...

[@LucareonVee]

@@christianb.4726 The feelings for wanting kids were manufactured? I guess that makes sense, given how annoying they are. 😉

[@jerga2002]

It is absolutely the worst advice to follow your feelings, have you ever seen how the feelings of a women change about something in a 28 day period? The same person can have oposite feelings at different times of the month… that is why we have tradition and culture to guide us through the unknown

[@texasred2702]

Complicated issue. The ones who should be having kids are putting it off, often till it's too late, and the ones who shouldn't ever have kids are cranking them out like assembly lines, often with multiple (unmarried) fathers and social services involved.

[@Michaelcmorris1988]

100% accurate, good comment man

[@IdExCS]

Nailed it. Reminds me of "Idiocracy". We're living it.

[@Michaelcmorris1988]

@@IdExCS "I'm gonna f**k all of y'all!! Wooo!!!"

[@sarahh3131]

this is literally it! the issue isn't people in general choosing to have kids or not, its the people who SHOULD NOT be having kids and doing it anyway, THOSE people are the problem.

[@PixelSubstream]

Yup. The smart people create social welfare programs and then decide not to have kids so all those resources just go into raising dumber kids 🙄

[@challenger563]

Why don't we talk about having children is much more expensive nowadays than decades ago?

[@SabrinaKim-Lee]

@@mmecharlotte👏👏👏👏👏

[@Mo-hc9lc]

Not that it was more expensive it’s that there’s more to buy

[@31tentacles]

@queefstormiest It is, that's a fact. You may not know because you don't have any kids, and if you have, you are not taking proper care of them.

[@gabrielgonzalez6456]

@@31tentaclesthe US government gives a $3600 income tax credit just 10 years ago it was about $500 credit… as a whole in our society we need a growing population cause they will take care of us at older age and keep the economy going.

[@31tentacles]

@@gabrielgonzalez6456 OMG, what? Having children is not so they can take care of old parents, no offense but that's just fkd up, bro ❗️ if a man wants children so they can take care of him when he is old, he doesn't need kids, he needs a nurse (or she, whatever), children are people, not objects or property

[@bak3456]

being 30 and childless is FINE. Too many trauma filled broken homes

[@YaYousef5]

Exactly. I love Jordan for lots of reasons and agree with 80%+ of what he says, but will never agree with his Christians puritanical views. Any hint of "a woman's life/essence is her motherhood/having a family, and if she doesn't have one by 30/40, then her life is meaningless." -puke-

[@joc7996]

I envisioned myself having kids. But I went through a bit of trauma in childhood. I was depressed most of 20s. I am in my 30s, never had a relationship. I think I will be single forever. I don't want history repeating itself, whatever that means. I think I am OK. I have gone through the stages. I am no longer angry. I am moving on.

[@dvdgalutube]

@@YaYousef5 I agreed. That is a gross opinion of what a human being’s self worth. I thought he was an atheist…

[@derrickchoyce770]

@Bak women and men are not the same men are designed to be alone women are not

[@microburst9059]

no it’s not, listen closely to jordan.

[@playadremingrl]

50% of women dont have kids. 50% of all marriages in divorce. Meaning A LOT of kids got to see their parents struggle through their childhood. I love being a mom, but being a single mom is heartbreaking and hard. I fight every day to see the light. Im so tired.

[@lv3575]

If you don’t mind me asking, why are you a single mom?

[@annajoy2306]

why i belive its not just having kids. its about beingin a healthy relationship. many people today have fears, hurt, shame, blame, child hood truma, trumas and attachment. and fail choosing the right people becused of it. or they are chasing, or lonle, or choosing someoned based on the wrong reasons. and kids grow up in a toxic or stressful eviorfment also cuse them to have truma. so having kids not the issue, having kids with less ruma that choosing good relationships.

[@slapjuice]

shouldn't have had a kid then

[@ZubyMusic]

Its clear that human beings suck at BALANCE... Cultures constantly tip too far one way or too far the other way. Look forward to seeing the full interview. Excellent visual and audio quality!

[@underlord3761]

My g✌🏾🇳🇬

[@Yeetus223]

The societal momentum is hard to recognize before it’s to late.

[@martenscs]

@Ram Rod Its called "Sheit Testing" at the global level

[@luisdawnfinder3188]

That would require critical thought, which most people lack. That's why cultural institutions are so important, because people will mindlessly follow it

[@Shatamx]

Its because we are only meant to be in a small community of 25-50 humans. That's when there is balance. Technology more so social media has flat out turned the scale upside down.

[@sherlock7898]

As a young woman, I eventually had to ask myself the question: when I die what do I want to have, a family and husband who love me or a job that’s already replaced me? Money will go to the government if you don’t have kids to inherit. All your knowledge and best traits will die with you unless you have kids that you have raised to be responsible adults. A job title won’t love you back. I decided that I won’t ever chose a job or money over my family. I desperately want to have a loving family. I would like to have something to do outside my family that interests me, that I’m somewhat good at and benefits society at large. That would be the best life I can plan. Edit: I didn't think I would have to say this because its obvious, but this is my opinion. I did not write this to convince anyone to be a stay at home mom, I wrote it because it's what I believe. I thought about this a lot, I used to think I needed a "career" or else I was lazy and a slave to a man. But life is not that simple, and motherhood is NOT oppression. It's a choice I make gladly, with full knowledge of what I am undertaking and what I am giving up. I'm not ashamed to say that I love my (future) kids more than any career. And once I am a mother, they will be my priority over myself. If you value a job more, then thats not my business nor do I care. It won't change my decision. After growing up in a pro feminist age and feeling ashamed of what I wanted, I no longer care what the main stream thinks about my desire for a family.

[@werejustgaming]

Problem is us men will not and not in increasing numbers accept women that age out and learn. We won't give our Prime based off what women find attractive to take care of and provide for women that squandered theirs. We aren't virgin or nothing, well some are, but we want your fertile prime or its not worth the risks.

[@mosesking2923]

You hit the absolute nail on the head. The funny thing is that all these women are prioritizing their education and career so they can be enslaved to an employer who will throw them away when they loose their value, due to age or other causes. I truly hope that these women spend the end of their lives childless and alone, so it can serve as a message to the rest of society that utilitarianism is nonsense. All your degrees, investments, and property is worthless. Your employer will throw you away in a heartbeat. Family is everything.

[@LocutionJulia]

As another young women working in a very technical field I share your sentiment. My career is nothing more than a means for creating a stable environment, and if I someday have children, if it is in there best interest, I will be walking away from it.

[@werejustgaming]

@THE ZOLDICS yes. How the hell did you read what I said and take the exact opposite of what I said as my intent? That's what I said. Women want our Prime and young men are walking away because it's a raw deal.

[@GaLyckShoCk]

@@mosesking2923 that's kinda harsh on women, but there is going to need to be a moment where something is understood more widely by them yeah.

[@Shay45]

I love this comment section because it has so many varying opinions. People past 40’s with no kids & loving it. People who had kids in 20’s loving it. People who had kids later & regretting it People who are unable to have kids and okay with it.

[@PwerRanger01]

Guy who wants a family and kids but will likely never get chance due to not being wanted. Add that to the list.

[@kathrynbsouth]

And the 40s desperately wanted kids and devestated with her infertility person. Add that one, too.

[@mell7702]

There arw so many reason to be thankful

[@CarolSmith_authoress_]

True. And they're all satisfied with their lives. There's a level of satisfaction with that.

[@omphiledirero5622]

@@PwerRanger01 I'm 34 and never been in a fulfilling relationship

[@ihopeyouenjoyedreadingthis2030]

I did a lot of thinking as a child. I thought constantly about everything. As I grew older I realised I couldn’t have everything I wanted in life (the perfect career, husband, kids). I knew I had to pick one or the other. I choose what my heart wanted and I decided to get married and have my first child by 25. Im now 36, have 4 children and still married to an amazing man. I am a homemaker. And yes, I am very lucky that I found someone so young that was right for me and who could support us all. Once my children are older, I will look into joining the work force to earn extra money.

[@makeitcount2985]

I think you should understand that the chances of you re-joining the workforce after a long gap is unlikely. Fortunately your husband would have set aside money to compensate you for the lost years being a SAHM given the fact that you have no income .

[@mark_sugar42]

There are many opportunities out there so don’t be discouraged. Many companies appreciate skills you have from running a household (eg negotiating with little terrorists 😊) good luck!

[@apebass2215]

​@@makeitcount2985 what makes you think it's unlikely that no employer will value her work ethic, people-skills, reliability etc.? Nothing stopping her from starting her own business either.

[@johnpopoff7950]

She will be fine with rejoining the workforce. A person like her is stable and has a good work ethic.

[@abhilashkrishnan2025]

You are an awesome person 💓 You have priorities in correct order.

[@carolynjones-vanheezik9013]

I worked this out for myself. The ‘wanting it all’ of the 1980’s is actually having to do it all. I saw so many good, sensible women burnt out and thinking the problem was them. Cruel.

[@paulinemichaelapineda2429]

True. But society won’t notice this things that women go through.

[@Coastpsych_fi99]

Agree. If it’s between children and career, the later wins. A child is a huge commitment (when you care) and yet women are not compensated for this vital labour.

[@mike-pw8hi]

@@Coastpsych_fi99 that is a very sad way of looking at it. you care more about money than your own family glad your not my parent.

[@trypotherapy7478]

@@mike-pw8hi That is because your family will *die* if you don't have the money to feed them.

[@boosted.boyo.]

@@Coastpsych_fi99 ignoramus

[@thistleskeptic]

This is all a fair discussion, but why is it always about why WOMEN are childless at 30? Why are we not asking why men are childless as well? I'm in my 20s and still single. I really see a lack of men willing to grow up and be a father just as much as I see women who don't want to have kids. I'm not going to raise kids without a father- not just a dad, but a true paternal figure.

[@wyleecoyotee4252]

@get busy child You have no answers Just propaganda

[@bannedbycommieyoutube5time920]

It’s a super easy answer. Men can simply wait longer. Women lose 90% of their eggs by 30. 35 is geriatric pregnancy. Men aren’t under this time crunch from a biology perspective. This is the science, like it or not. Women peak in the dating marketplace in their early to mid 20’s. Men like women with less baggage, better attitudes, no kids in tow, and that still have all their youth, beauty, and fertility. Like it or not this is reality. Men are judged more on money, status, experience, maturity. Looks matter but a man’s looks don’t fade nearly as fast as women’s do (on average). Men as a result peak in their mid 30’s.

[@96clarity]

@@bannedbycommieyoutube5time920 1. Sperm quality also declines over time 2. Statistically men die sooner 3. As a woman in my early twenties, I don't want to date 30-something dudes

[@epicwoad8999]

@@bannedbycommieyoutube5time920 You don't have to be so aggressive with your wording but what you say is true.

[@bannedbycommieyoutube5time920]

@@epicwoad8999 we need to stop tiptoeing around these issues. I would much rather have someone tell me the truth, even if I don’t like their tone, than lie to my face and mislead me. Things aren’t good right now between men and women, the data proves it. Shooting the messenger is a bad look.

[@sonyamoste]

I'm one of the women who have made it to 50 (I'm 54) and never had children. I'm ok with it. I'm naturally a happy person and one of those over achievers you describe. For context, I'm divorced. I have 3 adult step children who I love, great job and lots of friends and hobbies. We do exist.

[@natasharules770]

Not only do you exist, you are also doing great. There is no formula to life and we should stop searching for one.

[@becuteforme]

Same here, I'll be 40 next year and I'm still deciding if I want a puppy.

[@oscarwong4201]

Well step children are a way to have children so, God bless

[@maxrush206]

9:32

[@abrajean9634]

I'm childfree and so is my husband. It's even better if you can be stepchild-free!

[@nerdytube5351]

It's not about careers guys. I don't want kids if I have a career or not. I just don't want kids because not everyone is meant to be a parent. Career women are mothers: yes and there are millions of them, even presidents and prime ministers. I have had so much damage, suffered depression, my childhood was not great. These experiences did not make me the best candidate for parenthood. I would even hate myself more if I went on to have children then end up being a bad parent. I would never be able to live with myself. Therefore not having kids is the best decision for myself and my potential children. It has nothing to do with chasing careers and shit.

[@vernaxxx8940]

Parenthood especially single parenthood is definitely not an enterprise for anyone who is not wholly committed.

[@Mar1293]

Men will convince themselves that it’s anything other than the truth lol. They literally think their mothers and grandmothers wanted to have kids. News flash. They never did.

[@Arman-sr2gu]

​@@Mar1293Could you please tell me why they did have children? Because lack of birth control?

[@CokkiNetal]

I’m from an impoverished single parent household where I wasn’t valued and treated as a burden with frequent abuse. My focus in life has been on survival. Dating is difficult b/c men do not want to be tied down, help raise children or be monogamous. If a man cannot commit to me, I’m not having children without the necessary support to do so. I’ve broken the cycle of abuse and poverty and remain happily single and childless. I do have pets though.

[@PwerRanger01]

Most of time women don't have an issue dating unlike an average guy who doesn't even get looked at as potential even if a good man. As women have it so easy and have many options then it is the women at fault for chasing wrong men if can't find decent one.

[@remus2565]

" Dating is difficult b/c men do not want to be tied down, help raise children or be monogamous." Look for different type of men and a different setting. I know so many guys my age that wanted exactly that in their 20s.

[@amyg4549]

You seem like an extremely self aware, intelligent person. I think you will have a happier life knowing that you’ve made your choices so consciously, based on how well you know yourself. I think having another being to care for is an innate part of the human experience. However, there’s no reason you can’t offer that care and love to a pet, who will no doubt have an amazing life.

[@ashleyclaudette05]

Before my husband and I met he had 2 children. I'm 35, no children, never wanted children. Now that I'm getting older, I want children and my husband doesn't want any. Haha

[@ghostriderblaze17]

I'll be ur pet

[@bikinivice5365]

Many women don’t have children because of life circumstances not always by choice. I’m 32, housewife, married for two years. I always wanted children, but three months ago my husband got aggressive type of cancer and fighting for his life. I can’t even imagine ever starting all over again with someone else. I might end up childless because of that but I can’t always control everything.

[@timtibbetts4193]

I'm sorry for your difficulties. I appreciate you sharing this though. For the conversation, yours is a good example of a situation where a woman does not have children despite wanting to do so. I do hope the best for you no matter what, and for what it is worth, you are still plenty young if you did happen across someone. As you are able, it is always worth pursuing the goal if you wish. Or, if even you were to meet someone after 40, or thereabouts, adoption is always a great option for couples who want children but consider their age to be a risk factor for conceiving. In today's time, a couple in their 40s are plenty young to raise children even if biology makes it difficult. Regardless, I wish you all of the best!

[@teqnkka4403]

I have an example like this in the family, stay strong and good luck.

[@EadsB7002]

True, it is circumstantial for some. But you're much better off delaying in order to give yourself , your potential spouse, and your potential child the best shot at a stable life. It's really hard out there nowadays, especially for single moms. And no shade....one of my best friends is a single mom. But she is struggling bigtime.

[@hamzamahmood9565]

Do you think you have it worse than your grandparents?

[@LucareonVee]

@@hamzamahmood9565 Really inappropriate question. 😖

[@deenz3713]

Gen X here. We were all told by our parents to wait until our 30s to have children. Society shifted and wanted our generation to experience a bit more life, become more financially secure, and mature enough to have that kind of responsibility. Now Society wants to reverse it for the next generation?!! However, the next generation faces never owning a house. Prior to this a family could be raised on one income and own a decent house. I can totally understand why having children is becoming less achievable.

[@schulze6758]

Don't think to much about material goods. There will always will be a solution, especially as people are dumping perfectly fine goods for nothing as second hand goods. The most important and beautiful things don't cost money: loving parents, time spend outside in the woods etc.

[@4SlowFashion]

@@schulze6758there will always be rich people throwing away perfectly fine things. That doesn't mean a poor family can afford them, even thrifting, and the hours that costs to find useful stuff before the flippers do. Time outside in the woods is free, until you have to purchase the woods or land, or spend the time you dont have, while working to keep up payments on a shelter you'll never own. This really reads very out of touch with anyone being able to afford kids. but it shows you 'dont think too much about material goods' and don't know why anyone struggles

[@ccdecker]

​@@schulze6758 Oh yeah, because there are so many great jobs and affordable homes to purchase near "the woods" you'll send your children to play in...

[@jennyrodriguez5498]

You got! I told my daughter that you really can’t trust men to be providers or protectors anymore and men are just losing their minds. Instead of acknowledging that there is a problem with men wanting 50/50 now is when we look at alllll the responsibilities a woman must endure in order to be wifed plus having to work just as hard, marriage seems unfair for women. Now men use shaming tactics to force women to chase them. Makes no sense. I have 2 kids was married and stilll lived as a single mother. I would have never signed up for this shit if I knew that my husband was just going to find someone younger and dumber than me.🤷🏽‍♀️ oh well you live and learn the lies.

[@draganminic4928]

@@schulze6758 second hand furniture and clothing can NOT solve the problem of average house these days costing TEN average annual incomes, while 30 years ago it was only THREE.

[@ThSkBj]

1. Women are shamed for being childless. 2. If women get pregnant there's no guarantee that the father sticks around 3. If they end up single mothers, they get shamed for that too. They get told (rightly) that they made the choice to have a baby and now they have to live with the consequenses. I don't blame them for just going with the first option and remain childless.

[@a.c.n.9421]

I’ve never wanted children as a child. I’m 39, don’t have kids, and gladly don’t want kids. Having a family, children isn’t for everyone. Stay blessed

[@Herrera_70]

Exactly! THIS is what's hapening, people are CHOOSING not to reproduce. Period.

[@natasharules770]

@@clublulu399 is there any science to prove that or ...?

[@abrajean9634]

@@clublulu399 No, you should get out and talk to people more. You're making a silly assumption. Women are not hardwired to have kids, they just can if they want to. It's an option. Some of us don't want anything to do with it. Once you have kids, you can certainly understand the downside to it.

[@danixmoffat7229]

I've never wanted kids (I'm 38). I have a huge, dysfunctional family, and while I strive for and maintain a healthy lifestyle it's never been a desire for me. I've been with my husband 24 years, and we both love children but we are more than content loving our many neices and nephews. Don't let people make you feel like something is wrong with you. If it's in God's plan for you to have children, you will have children.

[@63annushka]

@@LapisPebble Humans are not bacteria whose only purpose is to reproduce mindlessly, many great minds of history died without children and they are still remembered, while the average family and parent is unremarkable.

[@zoesolanki961]

Maybe it depends on the person, but I got pregnant at 29 and had my first child at 30 - I have no regrets. I didn't have a bad childhood, but I definitely had a few creases to iron out on my personality before becoming a mother. I wasn't ready in my 20s, and would have resented having a child of I had become a mother at 22 or something. So waiting until my late 20s/early 30s was the right thing for me.

[@JessG_20]

Early and even mid 30s is a reasonable age to have children. My mom had my sis at 31 and me at 33. My grandmother had my aunt at 38 and my dad at 42. Feminists try to drive this narrative that women don't need to think about their age and they can freeze their eggs, and they have plenty of time, etc. It's lunacy. There's definitely a time limit. On the flip side, it's frustrating how the more conservative types tend to drive the narrative that women need to have their children in their 20s. Its as though they think we hit menopause at 30. Both mentalities are flawed.

[@VintageCardinal]

@@JessG_20 While you are correct, it's also true that men shouldn't have kids after their 40s. Testosterone plummets and autism becomes more prevalent.

[@JessG_20]

@@VintageCardinal Agree, that's something else I was thinking but didn't mention.

[@runningfromabear8354]

@@JessG_20 It does seem like the narrative is either/or. I had 3 kids in my 20's while working in aviation. And then I had twins at 40 years old last year. I've got to say, in my 40's, I realized I was too old and too tired to get through the pregnancy while holding down a job and definitely too old and tired to take care of twins and hold down a job. Eff that noise. But in my 20's I had a supportive husband and the energy and drive to hold down a job and be a mother. We shared parenting duties and I think we made a great decision going ahead and having kids in our 20's. 18 years of marriage and he's still wonderful. The thing is, I did college but never saw my job as a career. I looked for a field that would provide well for me. I was in a male dominated field and didn't try to compete for promotions. I was never interested in working myself to death. I rejected overtime and was told I'm not a team player. I'd rather be a good parent than a team player.

[@JessG_20]

@@runningfromabear8354 I can imagine having twins at 40 would be insanely hard. I was kinda shocked when I found out my grandma had my dad at 42. I've always felt the ideal age for me personally would have been 28 to 33..Sadly, I'm now 35 😂 I also notice that something else people don't take into account are the obesity rates when they're discussing women's ticking clock. Being overweight will usually affect fertility. From what I've read, overweight women tend to have much more difficulty getting pregnant. One of my older coworkers was telling me a couple years back that I need to "hurry up" because her own daughter who is 1 year older than I, started having issues with fertility around age 31 or 32. Well her daughter, who I've met, looks to be nearly 300 lbs 😐

[@BraedenTheG]

“Stay away from those people who try to disparage your ambitions. Small minds will always do that, but great minds will give you a feeling that you can become great too.” - Mark Twain

[@lorrieprothero2175]

I was force fed that i must want a carrer and that raising kids was a lowly position. I was told that if my ambition was to be a mom and raise kids that was a lazy, lowly, stupid choice.

[@kaylabeasley5886]

Beautiful quote. The question then becomes how do you as an individual define your own ambitions and your own greatness? From a very young age, I was discouraged from dating, discouraged from getting married, discouraged from having children... by people who genuinely cared about me and thought they were helping me. I love to work and I don't think I could ever be fully satisfied staying home and raising a family, but many many women are and I definitely think it is a worthwhile aim to pursue if you can be fulfilled by it. But by the same token, I don't think I could ever be 100% satisfied with my life if I pursued only my career and never had a family. My marriage is the most fundamentally important thing in my life, and now that I am pregnant with my first child, I already feel my priorities shifting. I cannot imagine ever intentionally choosing not to have this child or this family, even if it meant giving up my career. Luckily, I found a man to be my partner in life who wants nothing more in the world than to stay home and care for our children so I can continue to pursue my higher education and my career.

[@jebes909090]

the problem is a good chunk of really successful people were REALLY lucky. And then they have the nerve to say, just do your best and you'll be successful too, when they themselves just got there by chance.

[@youlig1]

@@jebes909090 yap, that's true. Having the right ideas and being smart you can still get stuck in a lot of places

[@youlig1]

i really like that quote. it's short, yet so clear and important

[@kittyandginger]

I flipped at 34. I was so done giving my best to companies. Now I give my family my best and it feels correct. I still get so many job offers

[@daniellelussier5397]

You’re a stay at home Mom?

[@erick2herrera]

The best decision you will ever make, god bless you and your family 🙏🏽

[@JaredCosgrove-gg3xj]

Now you just have to hope a another country doesn't declare war and invade. Considering 65% of men are single and don't care anymore about careers, that family could be gone.

[@eldenking2098]

Christ and the Essene's believed that bringing children into the world was a sin and trapped the consciousness of God in physical matter and it was a great service to remain celibate and spare the consciousness of god the cruel experience of this world ruled by the demiurge Yaldabaoth.

[@mustangmikep51]

@@eldenking2098 but how could the consciousness grow through experiencing Earth in a physical form if there were no physical body available to inhabit? thats why we come here to Earth...to learn about and spiritually develop our immortal souls by choosing to live in this temporary dream world of duality and pain....you need a physical body to do that don't you? Coming to Earth for awhile is the "fastrack' for our spiritual development...thats why we come here in the 1st place...the" iron must be made into steel" and tested in this world of illusion..in this world of "hard knocks"....

[@CJ-fh5xq]

I just turned 24 and see a lot of my High School classmates as Single Parents with one or even two children. I could not imagine how they can support themselves in this economy, especially having to divert most of their attention to take care of the baby.

[@EadsB7002]

exactly... one of my best friends is a single mom...she's in her late 40's but times are TOUGH for her. one of her kids is on college and is a total leech/spends so much unnecessarily. i feel for her!

[@catherinearroyo5359]

@@EadsB7002 Leech 😂😂😂😂

[@sebastienseb919]

That one of the main things that make if incredibly difficult. This economy. Its going to get worse. Having a newborn in this day and age is not a good idea.

[@jacksonmills961]

Well you can ask them why they're simgle parents. It takes two people and two incomes in most cases in this economy in order to properly raise children. You're right, it's not fair for the child to have a single parent try to raise them all on their own, but investigate why they're single parents. I guarantee most of your friends had children out of wedlock, or have divorced their spouses over reconcilable shit. We need to reconstruct the family unit, but it doesn't start with the children. It starts with husbands and wives to form healthy marriages.

[@zinazoulou3574]

@@jacksonmills961 you're missing something there mate,in order to re establish marriage the way it's supposed to be , Religion has to take power again and dictate its laws and thus reconstruct marriage as God's wants it to be, unfortunately the west is anti religion and won't accept to have religion rulling,so people will just keep roaming as lustful animals and women will keep being sexually exploited and impregnated out of wed lock and be condemned to be single mothers for the rest of their lives.

[@agathles]

I’m 31 and feel quite pressured to have a child. People around me say “there will be no one for you when you’re old” and “just get a baby, even if you’re alone”. Yes, if I had a supportive and loving partner with whom I could raise a new human being, I probably would get children. But saying to get a child just for my own self is extremely selfish. 😢

[@offlineraided]

Too old tbh dont bring in a deformed kid for selfish reasons

[@jacksonbow2766]

So not having a child hey. Will you give 40% of your income to families in poverty who are having children then? Or will you enjoy your child free, responsibilty free lifestyle to buy all the lavish crap you have all the freedoms to buy?

[@glenbenton4855]

Ive always taught the same. I would love to have a child, I already attempted once with a not so quality choice partner...Sadly it didnt make it. I was very excited to have someone of my own, someone that would love and need me. And I can love them back, but i always go back to your last sentence, thats extremely selfish of me. Not only that, its difficult to find someone that isn't so selfish or self centered to have a family. Times have changed and we should just accept it. There is no love or empathy, just the next day

[@agathles]

@@glenbenton4855 I believe that there definitely is love ❤️ just start spreading it around you and it will “infect” others 😃

[@glenbenton4855]

@@agathles You know, I don't want to be that "but i do" person but man, lot of people just take advantage of that and abuse you. Its the tale as old time but, I am tired of suffering due to my good heart and the ill intent of others just looking to see how they can step on you. Not to be negative

[@CatEyedGoddess]

My mother never wanted children but had them because of society. I’ve been in therapy for 10 plus years, to deal with my CPTSD because of the abuse I suffered as my mother resented my very existence. Please don’t have kids unless you want them. I know the pain of being a child of a woman who had a kid just to have a kid for society sake.

[@Lastdayone]

This should be pinned. Many women did NOT want children. They had them because it was the next “step” . Then the child(ren) are abandoned emotionally and mentally. Then men pretend to not know about the neglect because they aren’t being a present parent either. I commend you for taking the necessary steps to ensure your own well being 💜✨

[@alf3071]

amen

[@BrisaRuiva]

Exactly!!! People should only have kids if they really want to have kids and can provide for their kids❤

[@danniellejohnson448]

Same unfortunately x

[@TruthIsLikePoetry]

Would you rather have never existed?

[@tracyjacksonjackson4221]

This is utter BULL!!! I was once a 19 year old coed and I never heard anyone say that the most important thing in my life is gonna be my career. I was told to make sure that I'm able to provide for myself just in case I had to. Most women want marriage and children. What we don't want is betrayal, infidelity, adultery, abuse, overwork, underappreciation and the lion's share of the responsibility in the marriage. we are not your slaves. We are your wives. We want to loved, respected, protected, treated well and appreciated. This man looks totally uncomfortable spewing this garbage.

[@theinternetistrash666]

Don't worry, the reason all of these 20 year old dudes are getting rejected by women aren't the women, it's because they listen to this dummy and pretend they're Voltaire.

[@LizzyAlexis]

Peterson's argument, being that "women are encouraged to value their careers", only represents one piece of a complex puzzle. To understand the decline of motherhood, we must also acknowledge the current state of manhood. Based on my own home environment and upbringing, I can clearly understand why a woman would ensure their career is established before entering marriage or motherhood. For women, this decision can be a safety measure rather than a "self-boasting, self-centered" action. I believe that women, including myself, tend to equip themselves with knowledge, skills and resources in order to withstand the possibilities of divorce, domestic violence, father absence, insufficient spousal support... Unfortunately, in my experience, women oftentimes prioritize financial and educational independence over early motherhood due to the possible unpredicatbility of men.

[@Sara-qh9rn]

Exactly

[@NomadZeroOne]

It depends but yeah its a good point. I also think we have become way to obsessed with money and materialism in the west which has become an idol for us.

[@LizzyAlexis]

@@NomadZeroOne Very true.

[@---mc2qj]

Perfectly out. Thank you

[@belkisandreinamartinezasen1560]

@Drew Rushing It's interesting how in different cultures and countries mens tend to have the same mindset. I live in DR, where theres not support from the goverment for woman, there's no a win situation in signing up for divorce here. However most of the woman prefer breaking up due to the high rate of abuse, control, etc. so, i think that men should be humble and see that they are part of the problem too. I'm sorry for the ladys who feel down for not having a relationship in their 30s, no one can stand mistreatment. I just got out from a relationship with a guy who was a full follower of Kevin Samuel, and guess what? he cheated on me. Should i stay in a relationship like that?, no, so don't blame the girls who are in their 30 being single, i prefer being alone and happy than being in an abusive relationship, this is what is going on in real life.

[@VeaRobinson]

As a childless woman I have no regrets. I love the children in my life but will never have any.

[@thisishalloween8586]

That's awesome

[@pedowise]

That's good. We don't need your genes running on earth lol

[@Plopi]

life gets pretty lonely as you grow, hopefully you will change your mind

[@Zerradable]

@Etevaldo Skylab think more deeply on how social relations develop thought poeople's life.

[@thisishalloween8586]

@Etevaldo Skylab very true, I've known old people who've been alone after all of their children left for college to different states, having children doesn't mean they'll be there for you

[@leeb.7188]

I’m an older, professional white female who’s never married, nor had children. I believe this interview comes from an upper class perspective. The assumption is that women are choosing career over marriage/children because they place more value on the career. While that may be the case with some of the elite women mentioned by JP, it’s certainly not true of women like me, who are financially successful, despite being born in poverty. Basically, my father abandoned us and had another family when I was five. We grew up on welfare, in public housing. Despite that, I went to college and did well. But when you grow up in the projects, all you see is women and children who have been abandoned and left in poverty by husbands and fathers. Thus I went to college with the focus on learning to take care of myself and never becoming vulnerable to a man who could walk out the door at any moment, leaving me and the children hungry and living in a car until we were able to get on welfare and into public housing. And yes, there are a lot of women like me. I would love to have children, but divorce and abandonment by my father left me scarred.

[@janewhite6858]

I agree, I grew up in a Northern UK city in decline and saw terrible poverty and the poor abandoned women and children and vowed I would never make myself and certainly no child of mine that vulnerable. I also felt sorry for the men as most of them had their self esteem destroyed too...

[@gbd-oq1rz]

Poverty doesn’t mean a bad life. It means you will struggle with grace and mental fortitude. One day you will want kids

[@jvaneck8991]

Lee B., has it occurred to you that perhaps it was your Mother who abandoned your Father, running off with you and raging at your father "You will never see her again, and she will hate you!" Don't believe the Pablum that your mom has fed you; that comes from people trying to rationalize their own appalling behavior.

[@FUToob]

@@jvaneck8991 - Or, perhaps, her mother acted irresponsibly and got pregnant by a man who should never have been selected or given the chance to breed with her.

[@aredblip1315]

Women file most divorces (they can even file for no reason), are most likely to get alimony, most likely to get custody of child. This has been happening for decades now. Men get financially and emotionally exploited in a lot of those cases. There has not been an acknowledgement, let alone an attempt to solve this issue by society.

[@michah321]

No one "should" have children. If you WANT children, then it's great, go ahead and have them. If you don't want children, DON'T have them. I didn't have children, i chose not to have children and it's been the absolute right choice for me. I'm extremely happy with how my life is. Don't pressure people or fear monger people into having kids. That's a terrible reason to have children. There's plenty of people in the world. Every child should be a WANTED child

[@youdoyou1742]

I rather be a single than a single mom.

[@adarateranroldan]

… and you can be a single mom, married or not.

[@wade2bosh]

good. get married before having kids

[@Laura-Yu]

@@wade2boshRead the comment above you🙄

[@candyxoxo19]

He is saying getting married is better than being a single mom with children born out of wedlock.

[@Cocobelle96]

❤

[@annaglenn3490]

Does Jordan Peterson ask fatherless men in their late 20's and 30 the same question? Does he ask single men who are childless at 50 if they are truly happy?

[@kissme1518]

I hope so. Theyw ould happily say how they shouldn't have kids. Antinatalism for the win.

[@thaneknight]

Men can still have children at that age it's very hard for women to. It's not the same, once women make the decision there is no going back.It's a trade off for both sexes. The lie is it's an option later.He's speaking from personal experience and observation.

[@holyempressw8531]

​@@thaneknight so women in the late 20s and 30s can't have children? Maybe this is an American thing. My mom had 3 healthy kids between 34-40. She was too fertile and prayed to God not to have more.

[@thaneknight]

@@holyempressw8531I'm very happy to hear your mother had three successful pregnancies later in life. If you choose not to have children and change your mind when you're older;it reduces the chances of having children.It's not personal no one is speaking in absolutes. It's not a "cant" only a probably not.Male fertility also drops past a certain age these are just realities.

[@IWillBeSaved]

Of course not

[@carrie238]

Why are childfree women such a problem for some people? Get over it. Worry about your own life.

[@israeluct7420]

Kkkkk because human life has infinite value and every inch of our budies was made to have child. When someone doesnt want, had some really bad going on

[@BrisaRuiva]

Exactly 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

[@BrisaRuiva]

@@israeluct7420some people are even born infertile so that isn’t right lol 😂 plus there’s 8 billion people in the planet now. If half of population decide to not have kids there’s still tons of people to have kids anyways

[@AnaSchultz-kx9tq]

​@@israeluct7420Tell us about how it's like to be impregnating women daily since you were 12. Do you have more then 1000 kids by now, right?

[@gardenjoy5223]

Because of the vast numbers of them. That influences the demography of a country in many ways and NONE are positive for that country. Look, I know most Americans have had a very bad school experience. But for heaven's sake, before you make such comments, can't you just search the internet for the obvious answer? You might want to do it now. Or stay pretty much very ignorant indeed.

[@sogniella]

I love comments that say it is normal for men not to want children but not for women.... however, women are the ones who have to go through everything when they DO have a child. Body changes, hormone havoc, post partum etc .... in my eyes - it should be understood WHY a woman decides they don't want to go through that and then raise them (most likely alone).

[@JJH0326]

peoples like buttons must be broke, because me and you both know, you're a woman - and you're absolutely correct about everything. I'm sure like 30 thousand people have agreed, seen your comment... thought to themselves... I wonder why somebody like 'sagnella' isn't our president? She would be so great at it. Then I'm sure all 30 thousand tried to click that like button, and when it didn't work went right to youtube to complain.

[@MrTheWhipster]

I honestly just think that it is a combination of life being less and less affordable and the fact that more and more people are coming to the realization that having and raising kids isn't the end all be all goal of a fulfilling life.

[@zuzanazuscinova5209]

It never was. People just had no birth control, hence the high number of pregnancies.

[@Gnashercide]

@@zuzanazuscinova5209 so ban birth control

[@Coastpsych_fi99]

@@zuzanazuscinova5209 exactly people act like everyone wanted to have tons of kids before but there was barely any choice for most people given their was no birth control

[@B0BBYJ4CK]

@@Coastpsych_fi99 and you forget that a lotta people just go along to get along. peer pressured to have a family.

[@8Maduce50]

Well what happens when there isn't enough young people to support the retired population?

[@leigh7507]

I love being childfree but we're all different. Respect to parents and childfree people.

[@kiroshki]

Isn't childless correct? Like you don't call homeless people home free... Asking cos eng not my native.

[@Anonymousejfi3jdujejejdieo]

@@kiroshki I've mostly heard "childfree" so I think that's the widely used term

[@HalcyoneStarling]

@@kiroshki But you day lactose free for lactose intolerant. Childless is general. Yes, childfree people are childless. But childfree adds meaning. They are free of children, because children would be a bab choice for them, a burden.

[@leigh7507]

@@kiroshki childfree is the term used for people choosing not to have kids. If you search in Google you will find a lot about it

[@MmmMulholland]

@@kiroshki Not the same :) Childfree means they are free of children. They are not less of anything, in fact having children would make their life lesser. Homeless people mostly tend to want homes but struggle to access them, hence the home*less* part. Homeless people can also call themselves nomads, gypsies etc. They crave the freedom of no fixed abode so they would be deemed, in a way, homefree ...just different terminology is used.

[@HipHopLuv123]

Who also is a 30-year-old with no kids watching this 🙋🏻‍♀️

[@blakkwaltz]

I'm 28 with no kids.

[@m.dthedemon4076]

@@blakkwaltz NICE!!!

[@matt75hooper]

Here are the cold hard facts : At 30 add your 'body count' to your age. The number you arrive at will be your percentage of never marrying. 30 years old , bedded 35 guys, 65% chance you will be alone from here on out. Body count : How many guys you've had sex with. BJs must be included in body count.

[@missanaya3734]

32 with no kids and no man.. but happy. I'll adopt one day.

[@timharry5168]

Halla one right here ......shout from Johannesburg!!!!

[@sharamusica]

It’s expensive and a lot men have checked out.

[@user-zu5do6ri6r]

You've got that right. Many of us have no interest in putting children into a country that will not follow the laws as promised. I'm not going to work hard to make my child a slave in our new society.

[@ll2323]

I need to find this man 😂

[@bluegreygreen]

I never married or had children and I am 52. I knew from a really young age I didn’t want any. I came from a very violent neglectful environment and didn’t want to make the mistakes my mother made. Having overcome deep loneliness in my 30’s and 40’s I have no regrets. I thought at one point I would like to marry or have a partner but I’ve spent so much time alone that I probably couldn’t do it and I feel that my time has come and gone. I still would like to regain control over my health - I regained weight that I had lost - and be happy and enjoy the life I have so be it alone. Not everyone has the opportunity in this life to be partnered and that’s ok. I’m at peace.

[@ambeegaming76]

Wishing you the best!

[@johnnyBrwn]

At what point did either of them stop the video and say "Kelly Smith should have [insert your trigger]"? Never. This isn't about you. Stop being emotional. He's speaking in general.

[@aleksandrasuso2043]

@@johnnyBrwn of course he's speaking in general, but anyone can comment on the video and share their perspective/experience. Following your line of thinking, this person's comment isn't about you, so why would you reply to it? Also, how is this person being emotional? You seem to be way more triggered than them.

[@johnnyBrwn]

@@aleksandrasuso2043 Nice recursion trick, I refute her assertion underscoring how she's making a general statement self referential then you steal that and apply to me but your logic is flawed. I didn't refute her by using myself as a case study as she did. She's emotional because she took Peterson's claim personally, hence her self- reference.

[@aleksandrasuso2043]

@@johnnyBrwn Mansplaining at its finest. I still don't get what's wrong with sharing a personal story on a KZbin video, considering that the person never even undermined any of the points made by Peterson. Over and out.

[@jjkatz]

People who feel they have to do what society expects are either scared or can’t think for themselves. Do what’s right for you.

[@joshknight8973]

I bet you can't tell the difference between society and genetic need for human survival..

[@LucareonVee]

⁠@@joshknight8973 The survival of any species requires members who procreate and those who don’t. We have 8 billion people on the planet. That number needs to go down.

[@lillianp-yj6yx]

@@joshknight8973 we have too many people as is, willbe just fine

[@igors1234]

@@lillianp-yj6yx It takes 80 years for all generations to die and 40 years to make enough children to replace them. Will be just fine if people keep reproducing.

[@karienferreira2211]

@@lillianp-yj6yxno it won’t! When all those people start to get old and there is not a young generation in a sufficient number to be the work force and keep the economy going. Those who have no children and no money to pay for private retirement, then we will have a big problem!

[@Magdelene12days]

My God... if women didn't want to have babies before watching this video they are going to be less likely to now. Shiver.

[@Aleksandr-no5ug]

having Kids are waste of time and energy, do job till your 70 and then have fun with retirement 👍

[@MFanelli]

. I’m 32 and my mother had me at 40. She tells me I have plenty of time to conceive. I am not sure I want a child but I also wouldn’t put it completely off the table with my partner. I feel like he’s putting the fear of god into me when I watch these videos.

[@TheMick200]

@@tessamarie8698 What you said makes no sense, why would women be paid more just because they're women?

[@Coastpsych_fi99]

Yep. The more I watched this type of content the more I become certain children are not for me. I’ve always been vigilant about birth control and looking into being sterilised. Would love to hear his wife’s perspective. Its easy to want kids when you don’t get pregnant, give birth or have to give up your career.

[@jamesholster5323]

​@@Coastpsych_fi99well the overarching point of these videos is that eventually the shiny career kinda loses it's novelty and appeal. And when that inevitably happens for some women, they find it's too late to turn back the clock. It's not pleasant and I don't wish that on anybody. Some ppl truly aren't for the parenting life. Either way, know yourself.

[@rosahoran2480]

Having kids doesn't guarantee that they'll be there when you get old

[@stellareeber2753]

So true. Visit a nursing home sometime. 😢

[@Meister333]

that only happens in degenerate western/european cultures.

[@Meister333]

Nothing in life is guaranteed so why do anything at all in that case? What a flawed mentality

[@rosahoran2480]

@@Meister333 death and taxes

[@Meister333]

@@rosahoran2480 yep it's a loser mindset. Why take risk in anything at all. Why start a business. Why live? Weak pathetic excuses.

[@sarcodonblue2876]

What about childhood trauma? Women aren't expected to have kids young and those with trauma might be delaying it or choosing not too. Society needs to be talking about child abuse and healing trauma.

[@athena3865]

Society insists on having kids young so you don't come to your senses and realize that having kids is for society's benefit, only. No one asks to be born.

[@chiefswife1212]

We've got overflowing prisons to prove pregnancy is a joke to most!!

[@winnieboateng5334]

Exactly very good point of view.

[@shaybs]

50.1% got trauma? 😐

[@allforclout2040]

You’re talking about a minority not the rule

[@spnked9516]

I find Japan fascinating in this sense. Due to their cultures emphasis on education, they're about a decade or two ahead of us when it comes to this issue. Herbivore men didn't just appear from thin air, they were reaction to broad society changes. You're already beginning to see the same thing in the west. Women, generally speaking, don't date down, so in order to compete with, and outpace, women who are make the same as, or in some cases even more than, them men need to put in even more time and effort. A lot of younger men just don't want to sink 70-80 hours a week into work just to pull in a marginally higher paycheque, all for the sake of getting a girlfriend or wife they'll never see because they're too busy working.

[@BarryAllen-no9nj]

​@@starrisesky dont bring rich celebrities into this. They don't have the same constraints as 99% of the other people

[@RedDevilStudio]

@@starrisesky Clearly this is a general rule, also if you marry before you carry this is usually not a problem.

[@RandomCarrot2806]

@@starrisesky Which is why it's so rare for women to date down. There are a few exceptions of course, there is to practically everything, but it holds true for the vast majority. Should probably also make a distinction between casual dating and a committed relationship.

[@tobaby19]

Dating down means less education and financial earnings, statistically, black women date down at high rates. Anecdotally I have seen bw date/marry down and end up single mothers. Even though I love Chris Williamson's podcast I think there is definitely a cultural aspect of the show that does not include women like myself. I do not think the answer to the childless problem is asking women to date down.

[@Gabriel902884]

Ye what is the point in having kids and family if i cant be with them

[@pepy7779]

If a woman doesn't prioritise her career, and focussed on marriage and children starting in young adulthood, she becomes dependent on her husband's character and stability for her quality of life. This did not turn out well for my mom and grandma - both intelligent women, but who didn't have careers (only part time jobs here and there). Their husbands were tempermental, emotionally abusive and controlled the money. My mom.snd grandma had unhappy lives.

[@_munkykok_]

Fair point, there's upsides to having a nice career. (Especially if you're happy with it, it's way better than living an unhappy life, guess nobody'd argue against that.) But I think what Jordan was trying to draw attention to, is that when women become very successful career-wise (when independence has been taken care of already, so to speak), there's a good chance that going even harder (!) at the career front gives you diminishing returns. Practically speaking, it probably makes sense to be financially independent, but going even further and trying to out-compete exceptional top-level psychos in their professional field of choice isn't necessarily a sane choice to make, that is, it's neither a particularly necessary nor a fruitful endeavor, on average (compared with the family-building alternative).

[@DarknessReprieved]

This has less to do with being dependent on someone but whom the person is you are depending on.

[@pepy7779]

@@_munkykok_ Agree with you totally. I think when people get on one track in life, they are not good about making a change. Being thoughtful about the returns you are getting with the energies you are spending is something a lot of us need to learn.

[@DarknessReprieved]

@@pepy7779 The problem is still with women. It's always finances with you. Only women are affected negatively from being independent and successful. If something as shallow as money and material deters you from finding a partner, you're the one with the problem. You've never heard a strong and independent man struggle with relationships. That's because men are okay with dating down. We don't require someone to be rich, famous, or successful as us to give our love to. Women do because you don't enter with love on your mind, rather you enter with an idea of lifestyle. At the end of the day, women outnumber the available men in this country. Men already have higher rates of being single and not wanting to the date the women who are available. Yet you don't see men making videos about not wanting to die alone. Women do. Once again, this is a women problem.

[@Sugar_s_spices]

​​​​@@DarknessReprieved , what happens when the husband dies or gets hurt in the job, or loses his job and she doesn't have any financial backing for herself? In this economy, that's dangerous. Women in this day and age have to make sure they have skills, a job or a degree. Men are not immortal and women have to think about the future, if he was unable to work, isn't there or can't find a job. It's common sense that a women needs to have her own. Nothing in this life is guaranteed. Especially not finances. Especially if they have children together. She has no choice but to do what she has to do. But.... Why wait until the last minute. Any woman who does that is a fool. She should be worrying about finances on her in, just in case of an emergency. It's common sense and it's smart. Again, we are in a different economy. That man better be making really good money to pay for funeral expenses, rainy day funds, money for the children and wife to live on if he loses his job or dies(life insurance), savings, a house. Because if not, both her and the children will be living on the government. That's the truth.

[@blancokitty89]

It’s hilarious to me that two men (who will never have to deal with the trauma or stress of carrying a baby) talk about being child free as if it’s a bad thing.

[@paulb7207]

maybe it's actually better when men talk about it. So it's not all about trauma or other victimhood.

[@blancokitty89]

@@paulb7207 yeah no, for sure it's not. Men are not in a position to decide if not having kids is a bad thing or not. They are literally not qualified.

[@blancokitty89]

@@paulb7207 No it's better when wome talk about it. Women are the ones who carry children, so the men's opinion on childless women do not matter at all.

[@moridaredman857]

You missed what she was saying ​@@paulb7207

[@blancokitty89]

​@@paulb7207 Incorrect. Since they can't get pregnant, their opinions of childless women are not relevant.

[@sunshinelively]

I am 58 now but had my first child at 33, second at 38. I didn’t get the message that my career was the most important thing. It was more that “you better have a way of supporting yourself in case something happens to your husband, you don’t want to be caught flat-footed”. The economy was very rough for people my age and we ended up slacking and then grad school until things got better. Which they did. But the other internal urgency was that I wanted to make sure I had stability in my life before Bringing kids into the world. Finally, it was vitally important to me to have children and practice selflessness to raise them. Have to say it was not about patriarchy. Adding: just because you’re a woman does not make you a natural for mothering. Some of us logical women have to work up to it .

[@alejandrarios4290]

can you please tell some advice to have kids at 38. Did you take vitamins or just live and let nature do the job or went under special care to get pregnant quickly?

[@sunshinelively]

@@alejandrarios4290 nothing special really. Think I had to lose some weight because we tried the year before without success. So, lost maybe 20 lb and then did the usual procreative sex. Lol

[@shanfarco1574]

@@alejandrarios4290 every doctor tells you to just have regular sex. apparently regular sex every week for two years increases your chances by around 90%

[@leedlbagginshield8492]

You sound very smart and cautious :)

[@sunshinelively]

@@leedlbagginshield8492 thanks - you would be right about that. A lot of women my age delayed children. We all had to raise ourselves and didn’t want to do that to the next generation

[@ConnieFoster1]

I'm a woman that never wanted kids. Just never had the interest. I'm 43 now and still don't have the interest. So I guess I'm the weird one here.

[@Aleksandr-no5ug]

All hail feminism. Never have children. We defeat men and the patriarchy together. Never let a man run you. Lots of love from russia

[@battleaxe1976]

Same. I'm 45, never want to get married or have children. To each their own. Get asked a lot if I'm married or have kids... when I reply "no" that usually ends the conversation, which is pretty sad. As if that's all women know what to talk about with one another. 🤨

[@supamangaming7239]

​@@Aleksandr-no5ugahaha that's funny. Yea Russia thanking the single moms rn

[@Meister333]

What a loser.

[@SamIAm-kz4hg]

I think Peterson simply cherry picks the things. For example, he said "We just lie to them all the time. The first lie is, there is nothing more important than your career." That's REALLY simplistic. Women are ALSO told that there is nothing more important than beauty, and that there is nothing more special than having kids and a family. All of these things come from a variety of sources. He has simply chosen the one that drives his particular narrative.

[@Coastpsych_fi99]

Suits his agenda!

[@plaidword]

I agree that he is only highlighting this single viewpoint, but we should give him credit for talking about this specific "career" ideal. As a women in her mid to late 20's, other narratives about beauty and family have been a conversation for a while now. We know about accepting ourselves and our choices through media and our society, but infertility and its toll on families that DO want to have children is eclipsed. His conversation is really less of an attack on those who choose to be childless, but is an eye-opener for those who are not sure and are surrounded by current trending narratives.

[@Coastpsych_fi99]

@@plaidword Why? He basically parrots things that are already well established. He also ignores where those narratives were derived from and whose interests they actually serve.

[@melzzi4131]

and when he cherry picked that womens fertility falls after 30 XD male/female infertility is 50/50 at all ages for variety of reasons.

[@exas4791]

When financial stability is uncertain, some people simply prefer not to bring children into the world to suffer.

[@dennisdill5771]

Poor economic times are not a new thing. One can always say "right now" is not a good time to have children. Financial stability is never guaranteed. Have children People! Love them and teach them your wisdom so they can carry on when you're gone!

[@joefran619]

They need more servants in the coming years.

[@ojberrettaberretta5314]

ppl had kids during hungers world wars colonization etc our generations just lazy entitled and dont care

[@grandmasterb7398]

@@dennisdill5771 There's always a risk. A price to pay for failure. Many families have failed and they paid the price. Some of it heart breaking. Too many people have a Disneyland image of marriage and preach to "just do it". If youre not financially stable, dont get married. You'll pass the seeds of failure onto your children or set the family up in life or death situations.

[@naukumaija7056]

@@dennisdill5771 It's not just economic failure. Where are they supposed to live when the planet keeps heating up?

[@marzs794]

I love my money, complete freedom to do whatever I want when I want, sleep and a stress free life 👌🏽 28 with no kids and I am genuinely happy

[@LSSYLondon]

You are not alone! Childfree and happy!

[@idontarguewithpeasants]

same. 30something female here and married to 30something cf man (vasectomy!) and we love it! both have 6 figure careers in healthcare. we have just two dogs and a large amount of time to spend together doing things we love uninhibited live traveling, hiking what ever else we can think of. 10/10 recommend the CF life.

[@alexbrestowski4131]

Don’t worry you will be miserable eventually

[@amandai.1334]

@@alexbrestowski4131 lol keep telling yourself that bud

[@alexbrestowski4131]

@@amandai.1334 you will forget about this comment by the time you’re 40 but realize I was right. If not 40 then 50. If not 50 then 60. You will be completely alone one day and get relegated to a retirement home cause there will be no one to care for you. But we all have different regrets

[@clairekennedy5]

I am 48 and have never felt maternal. I didn’t fight the urge to have children in pursuit of a career, I just never felt the urge. I lead a happy and fulfilled life. A bigger mistake would have been to cave into societal pressures, and have a child because ‘that’s what women do’ I meet a lot of people who should probably never have become a parent. There are enough people having children for it not to matter if I don’t. I too have witnessed old people who have effectively been abandoned by their kids, and their sadness is crushing. I believe in freedom of choice as much as freedom of speech. You don’t tell me how to live my life, and in return I won’t tell you how to live yours.

[@surayaiffah4967]

beautiful

[@edwardc6288]

"I meet a lot of people who probably never should have become a parent" all of this 100%.

[@carolcity1919]

So having kids is a bad thing? You people are weird

[@clairekennedy5]

@@carolcity1919 no it’s a choice

[@Syndicate_01]

@@carolcity1919 Nah, it's the people who can't understand that not everyone wants or values the same things in life that are weird.

[@jlauren91]

Some of us know we would not be good mothers, some of us have mental illness and other struggles so it would definitely not be healthy or smart to bring a child into the world. Secondly, relationships are not what they used to be. Men and women no longer value long-lasting relationships anymore, with the rise of hookup culture it has taught us to treat relationships like flavors we can pick and choose from when in reality none of us are exactly easy to love. It takes real work and commitment to make things work, even in the best of relationships.

[@lt.2992]

I could be a good mother even with my personal trauma and challenges. I just don’t want to spend 18+ years of my life living round someone else’s clock. I can’t even stick in a job for too long. I didn’t choose to be born so I just want to experience life for myself through my eyes at my pace with all my senses without worrying someone is depending on me and my choices ✍🏻

[@BENR8108]

Children have an amazing ability to force people to grow up and be less selfish because someone else relies on you to live. One of the major issues in modern western culture is that we value being young and free with no responsibilities and, ultimately no limits/hedonism. I look fondly on my youth, but as a 40 year old father of two with a loving wife; my life is infinitely better and I’m a better, more responsible person (and thus better for society) than when I was in my 20s. We need to encourage all parties to be more personally responsible with our choices in life, and get people to grow up.

[@LordRykard9376]

@@lt.2992 at least you're honest about being selfish.

[@kubasniak]

@@BENR8108 not always... plenty of selfish and useless parents out there...

[@emergence8217]

Yup.. people never recognise there is alternate to incel.. femcel. Annoying that always incels get the heat and femcels are forgotten. 😔

[@kimscioloro]

If a woman desires NOT to have children, no one should be telling her that is wrong.

[@TheVaged]

Shill bot. No one said it was wrong, shill. The issue is our society made it hard when they do. You are a corporate shill.

[@timothyruff1561]

Dr. Peterson isn’t saying it’s wrong, he’s simply saying that he’s observed that 50% end up regretting the decision to postpone having children. Nothing more, nothing less.

[@tanishalavri3278]

​@@timothyruff1561 how could he scientifically observe "50%" of women? He observed SOME women regret it. But saying half of women regret it is an overstatement. It's ridiculus.

[@officialanimeedits]

​@@tanishalavri3278He is just a pop pseudo intellectual bro spreading the typical conservative narrative I don't take him seriously at this point .

[@whispershot3074]

@@tanishalavri3278 Observations can be statistically significant.

[@kenny995]

Honestly not having kids has been wonderful for me, and having kids has been wonderful for my friends. It's all a personal choice 😌

[@jarskil8862]

My friend got married and got a kid when he turned 20 😅 He and his wife are damn happy and are thinking of getting a second child soon as the first one grows little bit. I'm 23 and I could not even think of having a baby... and even getting a serious GF feels distant to me in my current stage of life. Atm happy with one night stands 😅

[@aaronpannell6401]

@@jarskil8862 thats what the 20s are for!

[@LorenCognita]

Notice how there’s no men replying to this man harassing him for being childless and telling him he’ll be regretful and lonely. They’re only harassing the women. I wonder why that is 🤔😂😂😂

[@jaymurdoch6161]

How do you know it wouldn’t be more wonderful if you and your friends hAd kids? It’s only natural to be positive about things if you’re w healthy positive person, but why the hell would anyone go round saying having kids is a choice, as if it’s picking out a type of outfit to wear or something?! 😐😑 If we don’t have at least one kid, do you know what that means? End of your unique set of genes, personality traits etc when you one day pass away..no continuation of yourself.. if everyone thought so lightly about this and everyone happened to ‘decide’ having kids wasn’t for them, you realise it’d be the end of the human race in around 100 years? 😏 Good job many of us still feel a huge pull to have kids ! I would say those who don’t want to procreate as seriously messed up individuals who’ve listened to too much ‘feminism/ one-minded-ism ‘. Wake up call…extreme feminism is as bad as extreme machoism .

[@demisor9701]

@@jaymurdoch6161 I love feminism. It should be more widespread.

[@Cheree_Wright]

I was always encouraged to reserve sex for marriage, and to avoid having children until I was married. I’m still not married and I don’t want to raise kids on my own even though I want them. I think some of us just haven’t found suitable partners.

[@ArielGonzalez1]

you are one of a kinda, cause a lot of your peers are chasing the seed of someone who is not gonna commit

[@hhardy2591]

That’s a HUGE part of it.

[@littleripper312]

For me it's that I don't see it as being financially possible.

[@jayg5391]

They’re too expensive

[@athena3865]

Children are not commodities. They are people who will suffer in this world and die. That is not life-affirming; that is immoral.

[@Kwatson855]

Sometimes it’s as simple as luck. I never found the right partner, and that is unlucky. I’m glad I didn’t bring a kid into the world with the wrong man.

[@sandyknowles5638]

This. 31 F. Same here.

[@mw6346]

Same! I never found a partner worth having kids with. Then at 30 years old my kidneys started failing very fast. That option is off the table for me now. I feel like it is a no win situation. I get criticism for being childless and told i will die miserable. Yet, I'd also get criticism if i had made the choice to have a child knowing my partner wasnt going to be a good parent. I'm fine with my life. I have friends and family that i enjoy spending time with. I am financially comfortable. I like JP but i wish he would understand its not so black and white.

[@alaskantundrawolf8831]

If you're so picky that you're eliminating yourself from the gene pool, then you're too picky for your own good.

[@thestorybehindthat5236]

Same. 37.

[@shanedavies16]

You listened to all the feminists 😂😂😂 enjoy growing old with your cats. You overlooked all the good men over the years. This is your karma.

[@user-zu5do6ri6r]

This is a good thing. Women are getting smarter. Why would women want to force children into a society that will not even follow it's own laws and social contract?

[@mmarriott5818]

I'm male, 59, childless and single. Having experienced life being childless and single for so long, I can guess a woman might have a lifestyle similar to mine. For me, and a lot of people, this is my best lifestyle.

[@dentistry42]

Single forever , 47, child free and loving it ! Happy Xmas 🎅🏻

[@skytoll1]

I'm male, 59, happily single and childless!! I wouldn't change anything I did in my past!! 🍷🍷🍷😎😎

[@LucareonVee]

Male, 41, boyfriend living with me, and no children. 🍻

[@dilipanthonypinto1620]

You have no idea what you’re missing but that’s your choice. Children can be a blessing or curse however.

[@skytoll1]

@@dilipanthonypinto1620 That's a risk I wasn't willing to take. 🤔🤔💀💀💀💀💀

[@bunny_0288]

Unfortunately, my husband and I are infertile. We've tried to conceive for 11.5 years. I have a sister and lots of friends over 30 in the same boat. Many of us started trying in our early to mid twenties. 1 in 6 couples are infertile. So while some of this is caused by people choosing not to have children, there is also a rise in infertility.

[@honkhonk6443]

What country are you from?

[@bunny_0288]

@@honkhonk6443 USA

[@idepartasair]

Did you take hormonal birth control throughout your teen years? Are you vegan? Not asking to be offensive. Asking out of genuine curiosity. I'm so sorry that you're in this position. I can't even imagine.

[@katinanawrocki4676]

I would go to a Traditional Chinese Medicine practice and see what they can do for you. They have herbs and acupressure that can help with infertility.

[@TheQuietCottage]

Not to be glib, but if you're wanting kids, there are plenty of opportunities for adoption and tax and other governmental benefits to help with costs.

[@doingjustfine9401]

Can we also look at men who abandon their families? Can we talk about why this is SO common?

[@lazynow1]

Yea very popular in the black community.....

[@juoliveira7423]

Verdade! Isso acontece demais.

[@rusty1859]

The women either select poor quality men or they drive away high quality ones. It's not really that deep.

[@lucasboisrame694]

And can we talk about divorce laws who are so incredibly risky for men that they would never take the risk of losing everything?

[@JasmineRenees]

​@@rusty1859 Oh yes of course! Everything is still women's fault. Yet 1 in 4 children live in a household with absent fathers. This is a bigger issue than women selecting poor quality men. Just like 50% of women in there 30's being childless can not be explained by just one thing. Stop being a dimwit.

[@vickiesorenson2383]

Why are men discussing this? They don’t give birth, mom raise the kids, moms have to quit work and take financial losses when they age. Most men just make the babies and often don’t stay once they are born. Single moms , lack of child support, having to work , having to pay daycare, and then not dating etc are all apart of this scenario. These videos guilt tripping women over not having kids need to end. Not to mention lots of women die in childbirth or have complications.

[@Dixie2945]

Yeah lots of women end up physically disabled for life after only giving birth to one kid and sometimes their vagina tears all the way to their anus when giving birth naturally, they have a hard time with holding in poop or pee and yet women still get shamed for not birthing naturally or for having a C-section

[@Dixie2945]

I’m sorry but no man is worth ruining my body and risking getting disabled, dying for they often leave women to be single moms anyways the majority of them don’t even help around with kids at all, if they helped around it would be nice but majority are of them don’t and put all the responsibility on the mother

[@LucareonVee]

As a man, I will always say that it’s never my business what women do with their bodies. Unfortunately, it seems that most in my sex are unwilling to give up power over others.

[@whatupinvaders198]

I was raised by a single mom. My dad abandoned us when I was 11 and it destroyed us. My mother dated 2 other guys after my dad and has now been single for over 10 years. I can tell you from witnessing it firsthand that no woman should have to raise and support women alone. These men aren’t trying to shame or put down women. They are trying to articulate very prominent issues in our society and they have just as many videos discussing the shortcomings and problems with men. Men and women want to be happy, but we can only be happy when we overcome our trauma and fear of the opposite sex

[@ansmokeful]

This is not what women are taught. We are taught to get an education and a qualification so we can protect ourselves from being financially abused by our husbands.

[@DTreatz]

No, you were indoctrinated to believe in that nonsense because you're actually idiots who cant grasp that those situations don't happen even a fraction as much as you think it does. Thanks for demonstrating your low IQ though.

[@pastelmoon9118]

and yet men say: dont protect yourselves!!!! be codependent!

[@aztekenen1]

and now you must find a man in your salary range or be dissatisfied. whoops, actions seem to have consequences.

[@schulze6758]

Abused by your husbands? Wtf are you talking about?

[@ansmokeful]

@@schulze6758 history.

[@Sikhindu]

The idea of having kids for the sake of having them before 30 without proper help (no mates, not enough income, no time to actually raise them) keeps some women childless by 30.

[@Sikhindu]

@@mirrorneurongirl Sweden tries to fix this problem by encouraging them to have kids early, and then provide daycare for free I think, then the parents can persue higher education and careers. I think I watched a short news article with something to that effect. So this means women can have kids really early if they want and don't have to be married. So I think there's a new set of challenges from this type of option too, but the the regret of being childless forever is eliminated.

[@aperson7210]

Exactly. But instead of focusing on that, people just want to bash women that actually want to create something for themselves first before being able to afford a child and actually succeed in it.

[@aredblip1315]

@@aperson7210 It is interesting that you see legitimate criticism of patterns of behavior in women as "bashing." Whenever feminism or women's behavior is criticized, the goalposts always shift to "it's the economy, it's actually the incel men, it's everything else." Inflated hypergamy, high promiscuity, high divorce filing rates, career chasing low maternal drive intelligent women are also responsible for driving many out of the gene pool.

[@aredblip1315]

@@Sikhindu Yeah work for a corporation and let strangers raise your child. Sweden is an uber cucked feminist country that is quite literally getting raped by foreigners. A lot of Western countries are suicidal.

[@aperson7210]

@@aredblip1315 I understand where you come from and I'm aware of this issues as well. In my comment I was actually refering to more "simple" or the "average" women if you want to call it. I don't know where you are from, but it seems like there is some kind of fixation in the US with constantly associating women wanting more for themselves with being feminists, hypergamists or career chasers, sure that's probably the norm there but not in other countries of the world. Where I'm from it's starting to be very difficult to survive with just the minimum wage, so in order to actually live our lives knowing that we can deal with any problem that comes our way and still have some money left, we need to have at least a Bachelor's degree, both men and women. I'm still in my very early 20s, I got my Bachelor's and I do want a good job that I enjoy doing and that pays well, but I'm not looking to get into a career where I need to dedicated hours of my life to it, and I do wish to have a family of my own someday, but unfortunately it is hard to even get out of our parents homes right now because of how difficult life is getting let alone trust in some other human being, in this case a male partner, to support both of us, yeah sure alot of women do wish to be taken care of but that is definitely not happening here tbh because both men and women are pretty much on the same boat now. I just think that this topic isn't fair because it doesn't take into consideration all womens experiences and situations, it just seems like we are all the same when it isn't the case. Sorry if I looked angry in my first comment because I wrote it after I read alot of unfair ones in the comment section of this video so I was pretty upset (which is crazy because this is the internet), but I just don't understand what is so wrong with women wanting to have a good life before creating life, just like men always wanted for themselves during centuries, isn't it better to have two people doing it so they can support each other instead of just one with all the burden? Idk, just my two scents.

[@marianakalfigervi6024]

Why isn’t he worried about the amount of childless males at this age? It takes both to have kids.

[@Calgar-xi7ph]

Men don't become naturally infertile with age, unlike women.

[@outdoorsman909]

Because men can father a child at an older age. Women can’t really do that so it puts time constraints on them whereas men are not under that same kind of pressure.

[@marianakalfigervi6024]

@@outdoorsman909 if a man has a child at age 60 he will only be around for a very short time in that child’s life, if a man has a child any older, he will likely die when that child is a teenager and not be there to raise him

[@deckhead33]

@@outdoorsman909 men shouldn’t have kids past 35. Not only do men die younger than women there’s also increased risk of them having children with disabilities such as Down syndrome, etc.

[@nicopillay4059]

@@marianakalfigervi6024 women have a small fertility window for healthy natural pregnancy. Biologically from mid teens until 35, socially accepted from 18 until 35, otherwise miscarriages, autism, disability, and ADHD become risk factors for the child as they develop in the womb due to declining fertility in a woman.

[@mohitarastogi2426]

The problem truely is the fact that women are treated very badly if they are dependent on someone. Education is barely a tool to be able to stand up for ourselves. Women would love to have children and support/raise a family if we are treated respectfully. The data you are pointing out is the result of unfair treatment and disrespect. One can agree that women dont require to have careers, if you are teaching men to be fair and respectful. Women trying to have careers is terribly exhausting. You cant even imagine what we have to endure. Things come to/agree for men easily in this regard. So just try to keep your sisters/mothers/daughters/friends safe, respected and comfortable, irrespective of their career choices, while they magically do what they can do.

[@AFIXFORNIX]

It's funny how Peterson keeps preaching to women that being a slave to your career is a mistake, while for men it's apparently fine to sacrifice everything for their promotion? He also mentioned is some of his interviews that women over 30 that don't desire children, are psychologically damaged. And men that don't wish to see the children they made? That's healthy? If you want to discuss why the family structure is falling apart these days, you might also want to consider that women are interested in partners that will be active fathers and present in the lives of their children. If the man is chasing a promotion and never shows up at home, he should not be surprised when the marriage fails. It's also kind of silly how they marvel that the age of child-bearing age is increasing. 500 hundred years ago most women had children by 18. With increased longevity and advances in medicine that allow women to have healthy kids in their late 30s and early 40s, it seems completely reasonable that we are not stuck with medieval customs. Does he also take issue with society no longer sending kids to work at the age of 5?

[@someopinionateddirt6561]

I don't ever recall Peterson telling young men to sacrifice themselves for the company they work for. I know he's said to directionless young men that they should aspire to be the most useful person in the room, as being productive gives people meaning.

[@AFIXFORNIX]

@@someopinionateddirt6561 He never addressed young men and told them to prioritize family over career in the same fashion he did with young women. So his silence on this front with regard to young men is essentially an approval.

[@deweesejonathan]

@@AFIXFORNIX silence does not mean approval. I have no idea how you can legitimately state something like that if you had even thought that about it for a brief moment. There are many topics he does not touch on, all you can say about his silence on any of those topics is that he has said nothing.

[@notme8152]

Well, if we really are psychologically damaged as he said, it's one reason more to not have kids. Better not to give them traumas they don't deserve.

[@AFIXFORNIX]

@@deweesejonathan In the case of women and career, he was very vocal about his opinions on what women should prioritize. So taken in this context, the fact that he did not address the same issue with regards to men speaks volumes. He touches on so many subjects, so at this point, whatever he chooses to leave unspoken carries meaning. It takes but a brief thought to realize that.

[@tamarawest6203]

I'm 36, childfree by choice and very happy with my decision to not have children. More people are realizing that having children is in fact a choice rather than simply being something that everyone does. Be very careful that you're having children for the right reasons and that is in fact the right choice for you in your life. Don't have them simply because you want someone to love you or to look after you in old age. These are very selfish reasons to have kids.

[@taylorg8509]

But who's going to pass on he family name ?? I'm kidding that's old school thinking and more and more people aren't having kids but. That may be ok due to overcrowding of the planet in my opinion

[@YTx90]

And having children clearly doesn’t mean that they will take care of you when you’re old. At best one could be put in a hospice

[@Cbd_7ohm]

Many people are selfish and have kids because they want a play thing and then don't even care about them, so I agree. Most people are too incompetent to be having kids.

[@Cbd_7ohm]

@@YTx90 Especially when the parents treat them like shyt their whole life. Dead beat dads and selfish mothers.

[@vikki8699]

Thank you!

[@Novalunosis90]

I’m a 32 year old, childless, unmarried woman. Is my life perfect? no. Am I doing my best to make it better?yes. Do I ever want children? HELL NO. I grew up in a large family with a bunch of younger siblings, so my entire childhood was spent helping raise my younger brothers and sisters (who I love dearly). I like kids, I adore being an aunt and love my nieces and nephews more than I can say, but I am just as happy by myself. And on top of not ever wanting my own children, I physically can’t have them anyway because there is too high of a risk that a pregnancy would kill me. I don’t think Jordan Peterson deserves the hate he gets online, but I can also point out the things I heavily disagree with him about. Just because I don’t want and cannot have children, doesn’t make me less of a woman; it doesn’t make me demented and it doesn’t mean that I’m lying to myself.

[@kantraxoikol6914]

and you can't admit that you're not the majority ? we're not talking about YOU...honest. we were talking about women in general. plural...not just you and your special life .

[@Novalunosis90]

@@kantraxoikol6914 My “special life”. Ok. Hope you have a great day and feel better about yourself.

[@user-hx9cv3uv7n]

You are going to be Offaly lonely at 50. You will be a completely different person by then.

[@maineman5757]

@@user-hx9cv3uv7n If she changes her mind and wants children there is nothing stopping from adoption. It safer for women with medical condition. Lot's of lonely orphans in the world.

[@user-hx9cv3uv7n]

@@maineman5757 it's not easy to adopt. They don't just give kids away to 50 y/o single mothers. A lot of folks get turned away.

[@Kelly-nt2rq]

The assumption that women do not want children because they are hyper focusing on their careers, isnt very accurate. Women often do not want children even if they dont have a career.

[@Crysta1986]

I'm 36 and I will never have kids because I have already been worn out raising my mother and other siblings. Still am. I'm tired. Some of us just have fucked up lives. It's not fair but I guess I must accept that I will never have my chance on the "competence hietarchy". Dammit. That just sucks. 🙄

[@jennytaylor3324]

You're not alone, believe me. I didn't have the physical or emotional energy left for kids by the time I was grown, and possibly owing to the dysfunction of my family of origin, haven't had the urge to reproduce. Life's complex, and there are many ways of being a mother that don't involve giving birth. There will never be a shortage of orphans and neglected young people in this world - something my teaching job showed me. On the flip side of things, I 've seen so many women who've poured their everything in to their kids, only to be deserted by them, and are left feeling confused, hollow and so far out of touch with themselves that don't know what to do with their freedom. Peterson fails to factor any of that in.

[@beneficent2557]

If its any comfort, I will never have children either.

[@ccrow3355]

Never say never. God has blessed many women with children later in life. You may feel tired, but if you find the right husband he will share the burden with you and make it easier for you.

[@ExplodingVolcano777]

@@ccrow3355 Most people don’t believe in traditional marriages anymore. The divorce rate is astonishing. What happened to being bound to death by grace and love in God’s presence?

[@ccrow3355]

@@ExplodingVolcano777 like I said, find the right husband

[@almamater489]

Better to not have children, than risk raising them in poverty and debt. Strong career or no career, we all work non-stop for low pay while inflation is going up

[@idontarguewithpeasants]

👏🏽👏🏽

[@abumuhammad8611]

It is OK that we Muslims in Canada have 5 to 6 kids per family. We will make up the difference for you.

[@almamater489]

@@abumuhammad8611 Good luck funding 18+ years for them

[@abumuhammad8611]

@@almamater489 What does that even mean?

[@xxxmxxwm1564]

@@abumuhammad8611 how are you going to make those 18 children’s lives good? Lol good luck. European families have less children, but at least they can afford everything.

[@natashaw3244]

It’s hard to find decent people these days. I’ve read a lot of comments of men blaming women and women blaming men but the reality is that society is sick and it’s hard for anyone looking for a genuine connection to find someone in the age of tinder and hook up culture.

[@sleeper9638]

80% of men are not even engaging in hookup culture so there you go

[@natashaw3244]

@@sleeper9638 just because it's easier for women to participate in hook up culture doesn't mean that we all do. you're just going to deepen the divide if you keep blaming women for society's problems. complaining about women in a KZbin comments section isn't going to help you get a date either. I'm in my early 20s and none of my friends sleep around. All in committed relationships or looking for a committed relationship. Lots of good women out there. Maybe if you change your attitude, you'll find one.

[@sleeper9638]

@@natashaw3244 Stop projecting your own singleness on me. I never blamed anyone, I just pointed out a basic fact and you go projecting your own problems and behaviours onto me. If all your friends are in relationships and you're not then it sounds like you're the one that needs an attitude change

[@sleeper9638]

@@fruitybubble3591 I came under her comment? What does that mean?

[@ArielGonzalez1]

make the search without hypergamy.... the options will expand a whole lot

[@laurened6505]

Why dont you speak about the harsh reality of millions of single mom who sacrificed their life to only be abandonned.

[@MidnightPolaris800]

Yeah it's too bad they couldn't stop nagging their husband to the point where he takes off

[@Thecrocodiemanmask]

Or how about keeping their legs closed?

[@jamin12342]

Majority of divorces are initiated by women.

[@MalesAreDemons]

@@ThecrocodiemanmaskTell men to stop coming in every women

[@MalesAreDemons]

@@MidnightPolaris800Typical XY comment

[@lilnavynurse84]

I never wanted children. Then when I got married my husband also didn't want to have children. When I was 34 I felt an overwhelming desire to have a child but my husband wasn't ready. Fast forward 2 years later and my husband asked me why we didn't have children. So, we decided to start a family. It was the best decision I ever made. My son filled a void in my life I didn't know I had. Especially, since I wasn't considered by many to be maternal. Becoming pregnant and having a child is a life changing experience. Fast forward to the present moment and we are expecting our 2nd child in May. I will say that parenthood shouldn't be rushed into if you aren't ready to commit. Parenthood is an extreme joy that nothing in life can compare to but it is also the hardest life journeys you'll ever embark on. So, be ready to fully commit and have a partner who'll support you on this journey. You'll find its one of the most fufilling things you've ever done.

[@michaelsix9684]

by nature women have a maternal instinct, you can't ignore it, glad it's working out well, sadly too many people are NOT FIT for or will ever be ready for parenting, why? they did get good role modeling to do this growing up, we have too many children growing up in single parent homes, they don't get role modeling for marriage or parenting, they often become dysfunctional adults with kids later -- not good for them or society

[@spiritofalaska]

fast forward to now and no one cares. then fastforward some more and i still whipe my a** with your story.

[@jvnd2785]

Children are not things that you can "fill the void in you with". That's deplorable, narcissistic mindset! Poor kid, will be eff'd up with a parent like you.

[@ThermicLight]

"Don't rush into parenthood if you aren't ready to commit." At 34 you were already leaving it late. People more so than ever are really getting carried away with arrested development. Wasting so much of their 20's on vacuous nonsense that they like to call fun. Only to approach family with some poorly understood notion of settling down.

[@jvnd2785]

@@ThermicLight, you make a mistake. It is not "arrested development", it's called using brains instead of your crotch. Intelligent, well-educated people do not breed- they have much better things to do that deal with endless puke and sh*t. never-ending temper tantrums, sleepless nights and idiotic Play-doh.

[@TheCanceledDancer]

As a woman who just turned thirty I feel totally screwed over. I went to college got the 9-5 and now I’m stuck. Even with my partner’s income I can’t stop working due to student loan debt. I can’t afford a baby or taking time off work and my clock is running out. I am beyond pissed that I was allowed to sign for a loan at the age of 17 that would decide not only my life but my future child’s (or lack there of) life. It is a tragedy that college was pushed so hard on my generation rather than trade school or even no school. I would be living off more money if I worked minimum wage at McDonald’s than I am now with over 20$ per hour because it all goes to student loans. I was 17, a kid and signed away my life.

[@Opal5674]

Dang I didn't go to college and I make 17 an hour. I support my son and me on my income alone, have a house half paid off, no government assistance, no debt other than house.

[@Opal5674]

I went to community College for a sec and quickly realized that thr boomers had turned college into pretty much a scam so I left

[@ivermektin6874]

Seethe more roastie

[@plushdogg124]

If I ever have children, my advice to them will be to only choose college if they want to be a doctor/engineer/lawyer/scientist. Otherwise go to a trade school.

[@kingrimjob]

It’s $20 not 20$.

[@Aliena92]

So I don’t get what the problem is. Are we supposed to reproduce for sake of reproduction or do our best to create prerequisites for raising a child in a healthy environment with the right person? How many women who had a child in their 20s are good at parenting and raising a moral human? How many rushed marriages have ended in divorce by 30 leaving kids unhappy? How many marriages between incompatible partners in their 20s have resulted in traumatized children who have grown into mentally damaged adults later in life? Why are all women/men expected to have a child? Why is an individual's worth equated to his/her reproductive ability? There are people with questionable qualities who should not have a child at all. So why do we promote this idea of conceiving as if it's not an ethically responsible act but a biological milestone? Maybe designing a test/exam to allow people to have a child would be a more sound argument because that might effectively weed out 70% of population.

[@emergence8217]

Yes I agree.. we need baby mama's and a guy can pay for it. Many women are not equipped to raise children. Raising 6 kids takes same time and attention as raising 1 kid. It's waste of resources for every women in society to have 1 child instead multiple men impregnate a hot chick and pay welfare. It is best for society.. 👍

[@briggy4359]

Yes, eugenics. Let's sterilize those who fail the test

[@Aliena92]

@@briggy4359 Not eugenics. Don’t distort my words, please. I’m speaking about people working on their mental and emotional health and developing parenting skills before having a child.

[@briggy4359]

@@Aliena92 yeah, people can choose to do that now if they wish. The issue you see is that some people just want to make a baby regardless of preparedness. Its animal intuition.

[@briggy4359]

@@Aliena92 quote: "maybe designing a test/exam to ALLOW people to have a child would be a more sound argument because that might effectively WEED OUT 70% OF THE POPULATION." You're telling me that allowing certain people to reproduce doesn't inherently imply DISALLOWING others? What about effectively stopping 70% of the population from reproducing? You must be a Bill Gates alt account.

[@betha8761]

Doesn’t always have anything to do with a “Career”. Has to do with personal choice and the actual true desire to have kids or not have kids.

[@stoned8034]

so 50% of woman dont want kids is that what you saying?

[@shoshanafox727]

I would have been a terrible mother in my twenties. I had a child on purpose at 43. I wasn't a perfect mom, but I'm glad I waited.

[@povang]

How did you have a kid at 43? dont a females eggs shrivel up and die at 40?.

[@EA-by2he]

@@povang it varies for all women and eggs start to shrivel up between 40s and 50s its where menopause starts and its not an abrupt stop, its gradual . Sure , youre not as fertile as you were in your 20s still doesnt mean you cant have kids in your 40s up to 50s thats a myth, you can its just the rate is much lower and harder to conceive giving the illusion that you can never have kids after 35. She could also likely froze her eggs which doesnt affect the baby as you would if conceived naturally in your 40s. So yes her having a child at 43 isnt impossible

[@chico9805]

And we wonder why rates of down syndrome and autism in newborns, are so high nowadays.

[@EA-by2he]

@@chico9805 who told you that? cite your links, there's no such data in recent days, although it is true there's higher risk of that if pregnant in older age, but there's no such data showing an increase of DS and autism in newborns because people are choosing to have kids later. DS and autism is also possible in newborns born to mothers who are below 30 mind you. Its not a guaranteed mutation but more of a risk, and even if there is proof that there's increase in DS and autism how are you so sure its because of pregnancy in older age and not other factors such as the father's sperm, lifestyle, diet etc?

[@chico9805]

@@EA-by2he What a lovely knee-jerk comment. You have nothing to say, that actually disputes my claim, because it's an irrefutable fact, that geratic pregnancy leads to a higher rate of defects. Stop the cope and accept reality

[@paulagrant961]

The mindset of career above all is so easy to fall prey to. In my twenties I vowed I would never marry and definitely NOT have children. But as the years went on, exactly as the doctor describes, my career did not provide enough meaning or happiness. I was desperately lonely even though I had many friends. I am thankful to say that a charming man changed my mind and we are now married with four children. Thank God.

[@livetwice7702]

Lovely , and I’m glad you had more than one child . I have 2 and they are amazing children , why didn’t I have 4 , I wish I had now …..this one child or no children in 30’s generation is very sad …we are not China with a one child policy ……have more children and God bless you …..in fact you are blessed already with your young family and enjoy every moment with them .

[@schmingusss]

I'm male, in my 50's , great career but no kids. Life is empty. I don't recommend going the childless route.

[@colbalt95]

@@schmingusss yeah but if you have your stuff together and your body, confidence and paper straight you can date a woman in her 20s or 30s. Time works In a man's favor. That's your choice to remain single.

[@JosefFurg1611]

@Marie Baker ?? "And the Lord God said, *It is not good that the man should be alone;* I will make him an help meet for him. 19 And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. 20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. 21 And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; 22 And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. 23 And Adam said, *This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh:* she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. 24 *Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh."*

[@lafandio8954]

@Marie Baker God does not tell us to follow humans, but he does say we need to be with other people. Yes, plenty of Christians are terrible at actually following what they say they believe, but that's just the way people are. Everybody does wrong, but we still need to be in community with each other. Living for people and living with people are very different.

[@annwood6812]

Believe it or not, a lot of women don't want kids.

[@qtchickn615]

Ive made lists of the pros and cons of having kids, the pros being two sentences: theyre cute, 2. May potentially provide for me when Im old, spiritually and financially. Heavy emphasis on 'potentially'. While my cons list keeps growing into multiple pages. Providing a good life for a child in this economy is a luxury.

[@sarahrobertson634]

Spot on. Women don't need children to be fulfilled

[@jayc342009]

@@sarahrobertson634 a lot of women regret it too, when they are older and can't have kids

[@sarahrobertson634]

@@jayc342009 Some do, some don't.

[@MalesAreDemons]

@@jayc342009Lies

[@Alison2436]

You guys might want to look into dropping male fertility rates as well. Scientists studying the decrease in male fertility believe by either 2030 or 2040, 50% of all men will be completely infertile, they think it's due to microplastics but they are still trying to figure out for sure if that's what's causing it. so even if people wanted kids we are going to have a fertility crisis among men soon anyways.

[@TimeGoes-b7x]

@@Alison2436 Yes it's pollution of the environment. Plastics and other forever chemicals disrupt the endocrine system. Women are also affected adversely in more ways to seems. Neuroticism seems to be at heightened levels for many women. And then combine with various forms of birth control, throwing natural processes out of alignment.

[@dmimz7691]

50% worldwide? I’d have to see this article to believe that. I think you misunderstood

[@PNJB_R]

​@@dmimz7691 I thought so too. Look it up, soon humanity will have a big problem on their hands. No men will be able to reproduce, a lot of women don't want to anyway, so those that are left ? Will not be enough for the next generations, society will collapse as the population ages and humanity will sink into time like I am sure many other civilizations across the universe have.

[@ВладиславВладислав-и4ю]

So, without microplastics only 40% men reproduce and 80% women

[@ВладиславВладислав-и4ю]

So, without microplastics only 40% men reproduce and 80% women

[@user-rq4rt3ti8l]

I’m confused. Women can have kids after 30. Isn’t it better for society to be able to provide for your children, than let the state do it? Not only women have difficulty conceiving - half of the time, it’s men who have an issue too. Let women have good jobs and get educated. What’s wrong with that?

[@michaelwellen2866]

In general, people can finish with school by the time they're 23. If they get a Masters, 25. Law School, 26. This whole time, women are generally dating around (it's not like they're scholastic monks, after all). Now, if a woman dates with an eye towards marriage, eventually settling into a relationship, she's just fine. Most of the women in my parent's generation did exactly that, and they made it work. The problem pops up when women *don't* prioritize this part of the process. That's when trouble starts.Then they reach 30-32, and try to rush the whole process. They oftentimes run out of time to achieve their goals for family. Women pursuing their dreams is great. But too much emphasis is put on some dreams at the expense of others.

[@Biracialbaddie]

I think society works against our biological nature

[@xTwinVipersx]

100%! It is better to wait and be ready!

[@CountArtha]

I seriously doubt it's "half the time."

[@dion5804]

@@CountArtha Yes, it is. There's a lot of papers about male infertility.

[@tonysoprano1884]

An apartment in most major U.S. cities big enough for a family are 3000 dollars a month. How the hell can you afford to raise a kid if you're not a millionaire?

[@BrisaRuiva]

Exactly!!!!

[@Mint-kj9kw]

Because children aren't that expensive. Use cloth diapers instead of disposable.....breastfeed instead of formula....homeschool instead of private schools

[@tonysoprano1884]

@Mint-kj9kw nobody can afford private school if they aren't rich. Secondly homeschooling aside from being shitty education is impossible when both parents have to work full time to pay the mortgage. By the way it costs over 10 grand just to have a kid these days.

[@schulze6758]

How about don't living in a major US city? The leeches are sucking you dry there. Even if you do manual labor in a small town, you are way better off and the standards of living are also higher. And as the @Mint-kj9kw said, don't fall for the consumer society. Kids need time outside, not expansive toys (which you, btw, can get dirt cheap "used"). And often relatives flooding you with presents.

[@tonysoprano1884]

@schulze6758 That is not an option for everyone. There's nowhere near enough housing in rural areas for the 100 million Americans living in major cities to move in. Even if they did, the housing market would skyrocket just like it is in Texas and Florida, and in turn, the state will get more expensive to live in.

[@Mellyouttaphase]

This whole dichotomy of children v. career is ridiculous. This implication that all childfree (by choice) women are success-driven money hungry girlboss go getters is not helping.

[@kirstenrichards8558]

One word....feminism.

[@danielhawthorn6639]

​@@kirstenrichards8558 Feminism is all about equal opportunity and personal choice, aka individual liberty.

[@user-fj4zc2sr5z]

I’m 33 and don’t have kids because I can’t afford it…my partner and I just had to downsize to basically living in one bedroom in a house that’s falling apart because we can’t afford rent anywhere else right now. And no, we don’t live in some big, expensive city. I can’t fathom having enough money to raise a child and provide a safe, clean home for them. I can’t even provide that for myself right now.

[@RuthRandoms]

Absolutely. I had a miscarriage at 42, now at age 50 it's just never going to happen. I was never bothered about having kids really, but some women can't have any! Finding a decent guy to settle down with is almost impossible these days for many women, I don't mean because men don't want to settle down, I just mean there's almost zero men I'm actually attracted to in that way! I just haven't found anybody I want to be with. (And saying women can't have a career and children at the same time is just stupid really, plenty of women do this don't they?)

[@multination7350]

@@RuthRandoms Should not have watched so many shows with hot guys in it