The Science Behind Safe and Loving Relationships

In this video, I explore the science behind safe and loving relationships. Discover the secrets to creating a strong and healthy connection with your partner!
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Hi, I'm Kenny Weiss 👋
I teach the four pillars of the Authentic Self Cycle: Truth, Responsibility, Healing, and Forgiveness.
I will do my best to provide you with the knowledge, skills, and tools to heal childhood trauma, childhood emotional neglect, codependency, narcissistic abuse, stress, shame, fear, anger, sadness, self-deception, self-sabotage, depression, divorce, relationship problems, parenting, parental alienation, estrangement, addiction, mental health, mindset, self-love, and the worst day cycle so you can reclaim your authentic self.
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[@Natasha-n2e]

A good friend suggested your work may be helpful, and I’m grateful he did. This video in particular made me realise that after being with my spouse for 20 years, a lot of the disconnection we are experiencing is related to those negotiables and non-negotiables. I recognise there is a lot of deeper work to be done individually and together, but this video was truly eye opening and I thank you.

[@ggmazin757]

Kenny 🎉thank you, in the summary of your words. I must create a place of safety and trust in me . In order to see that everything I hate about him is everything I need to heal within me. ❤

[@mvbigmagic4048]

Ouch. Yes.... so true.

[@lupevaldes3370]

This was very eye opening ❤

[@LisaDunahoe]

Brilliant! So glad you got this in writing… can’t wait to read your new book! I am 61, married 39 years, have 4 adult children. I see the truth in what you’re saying. I have many opinions as a mom who in college studied Education and child psychology. I know that respect is the major component even as infants, toddlers, … Respect at every age. I look at each child straight in the eye so I can try to understand the personality when that they are born with. ( not perfect in any way) Also respect from adult to adult is what you are getting to ultimately. I love that. Thank you for your work!!!

[@marcimccann1109]

Wow! I've never thought of it that way. You have opened up a whole new world to me! Thank you❤

[@kennyweiss]

Glad it was helpful!

[@ShirleyNWatts]

This is terrific Kenny. Your so gifted with wisdom. I have listen to lots of professionals but you are one of the smartest. Yes I always agree with you. Some things I have learned and it so true. 🙏🏽🙏🙏🏽🙏🙏🏽❤️❤️❤️

[@kennyweiss]

You are so welcome

[@Debbie-pq4xr]

I understand what you are saying. I wish I had known this before. It's too late for me and my fiance. We both have things in our childhood that caused the breakup 💔

[@stevebruce1235]

I have been listening to these videos for a few years, I'm amazed, at the freedom,the weight I've carried all these years,the pain I've relieved,and now at 62 I realize there is an answer,I was married for 17 years, divorced for 9,now we are remarried,hope is the only word that comes to my heart,I believe their is always hope,where their is truth and healing

[@mrgrow2417]

This is a great video

[@TheTuberQ]

Can I share this with my ex partner? We broke things off 3 weeks ago; We both needed to work through our childhood traumas and Kenny you have kick started me in a massive way. I believe this would be SO valuable for her. Or should I just keep it?

[@racalu1993]

Let each person find his/her own conclusions

[@JudeyCat]

Would love additional resources on this, I think I want to start this exercise for myself.

[@stevebruce1235]

I totally get this......thank you Kenny

[@kennyweiss]

You bet!

[@LoveEm-r9i]

Very helpful ❤😢

[@kennyweiss]

Glad it helped!

[@tinyfacemcgee9211]

Kenny, can you help fifty year old women who don’t want to be online figure out how to meet guys the Pld fashioned way. I don’t drink and I don’t want to go to bars. Right now all I can think of is coffee shops. I mean, I don’t want to go to a driving range and pretend to play golf. How do I put myself out there?

[@JudeyCat]

Do you have a book on this topic, values/goals and confrontation models? I think this is really valuable. Thank you

[@kennyweiss]

You can check out my full list of resources on my website. I highly encourage you to check them out as I have a wide variety of materials you can use on your healing journey. Happy healing! :) kennyweiss.net/

[@ninajawnyj6091]

Ok

[@rebeccajones8628]

You must have a humungous closet Kenny. 🤣🤣

[@JUMPforyourLIFE]

I clicked on this video to see the cluttered, strangely-colored room.

[@mrgrow2417]

Respectfully, no such thing as unconditional love .

[@DWSP101]

Yes unconditional love is a real thing, but most people cannot live up to those expectations due to the fact that most people don’t know themselves well enough to be able to even give love to themselves nonetheless another person unconditional love is not necessarily a beautiful thing unconditional love is not servitude unconditional love is not just doing whatever somebody wants. Unconditional love still has healthy boundaries still has respectable understanding of each other’s needs. Unconditional love is something unique it’s something that grows and thrives even in the shittiest of situations unconditional love you have to understand is not something that most people find humans are very flawed, but it is real.

[@DWSP101]

@ApostateMike I’m not gonna take the whole Jesus Christ approach with you. Obviously, you’re nihilistic views are very strong and you’ve already had enough trauma from the bullshit that most religious groups usually bring because of the righteousness and not providing any real substance to be able to satiate what is missing the hole that you feel I’m not gonna give you some babbling religious text I am a Christian I do believe in God, the afterlife maybe not completely the same as the rest, but I can tell you this You don’t have to look to religion, define peace. You don’t have to sit here and argue about whether you believe in a God or not God is within every single person whether you believe it or not, you can look at that as the spirit those few micrograms that disappear from a person’s body when they die you can look up the science if you wanna find that or I don’t care whatever floats your boat but unconditional love is most people think love is this beautiful thing it is but it comes at a cost. Love does requires sacrifice because it requires a person to be all sympathetic, empathetic and compassionate, and be able to stay balanced between the needs and the shared wants between each other and have bad blood between you and the other person or if you have bad blood between you and other person to be able to reconcile it. My faith is concrete. I know there’s an afterlife. I’ve already seen things that I know we’re not hallucinations because shit other people saw the same thing and they all described it exactly the same and nobody had been able to talk to each other at all before those things happened so you can look at it as supernatural or Aliens it don’t matter whatever floats your boat let’s put it beyond our science prove that that’s evidence alone that’s in fact they talk about different dimensions. Nowadays they talk about theoretical time and space science that legitimately is based in factual evidence. How far fetched is it for there to be some omnipotent being from another dimension that rules over us who say that isn’t heaven and hell the spirit isn’t a form of energy nonetheless there something more powerful than us humans perceptions are flawed half the time they act on instinct instead of being perceptive and that’s much different than perception. There is such thing as unconditional love but it’s not as pretty as what most people think. It requires sweat, tears blood sacrifice it comes at cost, but if you’re willing to pay it then the willingness alone is enough to call it. Unconditional love. I’ve seen many comments like yours many other people say the same thing. It’s because they got bad blood between them and religious groups. Don’t matter if you’re a Christian or a pagan if you have bad, they tarnish your perception. Makes it difficult for you to use introspection and be perceptive. I can tell you’re not stupid. You have a high IQ the way you word your words I have a high IQ and EQ I don’t need to say the number for you to be able to realize that I do understand you more than you might be willing to elaborate on Let me know if I’m right just wanna see if I’m still able to read people which is a skill I had to learn I was not born with it Ps. Sorry if my grammar is a little off right now I’m using speech text. I’m too tired to type, but I hope you can understand. Despite my grammar being messed up here and there needs periods to giant run-on sentence needs a few grammar checks here and there, but I hope you understand what I’m trying to convey.

[@BB-rd9fi]

I second this ​@@forestgreen435

[@danielkaiser8971]

Unconditional love is not necessarily perfect nor is it necessarily lasting, since humans are not perfect or lasting. It's just love that is unconditional.

[@therocknrollcook]

Useful and quite Brilliant ❤❤❤ ps : sharp outfit 😊

[@donovangray4246]

There is a big difference between a parent being a parent who did not act perfectly and a parent that was a sadistic and pathological narcissist. My mother NEVER loved me and had me only because abortion was illegal in 1969. I was born a mistake and you can't convince me that was ever true. My mother deliberately humiliated me and set me up to be sexually abused by other people. This is not just because she wasn't given the right parenting growing up.

[@ninajawnyj6091]

Safe from what?

[@DWSP101]

He’s talking about the vulnerabilities people have within themselves, the negative self reflections upon themselves where they might be looking at themselves in a negative way and they don’t feel safe to be vulnerable with those an external world so when you bottle up all those vulnerabilities and you put up a mask to hide them you’re not handling them you’re not taking care of The things within you that make you feel vulnerable. He’s talking about building some form of self-confidence within self to accept your own vulnerabilities. Stoicism helps in this area but at the same time I think he’s also talking about where people have soft spots in their shell being able to come to terms with your own vulnerabilities, excepting them and loving them self expression for yourself, everybody has vulnerabilities within themselves emotionally. These things can be extremely complex, and sometimes most people are unaware of their own vulnerabilities due to the fact that they can’t accept that they might have a soft spot weak spot it’s about letting the ego die stop bending to peoples perceptions of what strong is and showing yourself tender love and care excepting that you’re not perfect and you don’t have to be at least I hope I’m understanding this person correctly. He can comment here and tell me if I’m on the right track but for the most part, most people have an inner person that they neglect being able to inwardly look into yourself and use introspection and perception to analyze yourself to see what part of you is hurting. Feel it except it and show yourself love. It’s a form of safety which looks like confidence at times because the person is certain of themselves therefore they do not give the power of being vulnerable to those around them and they have confidence in themselves and they do not need anybody else’s assurance bringing a sense of tranquility to the persons, heart and soul on the inside making them less vulnerable to trying to tend to people with unrealistic demands or perceptions remember, perception is flawed even our own perception is flawed of ourselves. It’s about deep soul, searching, figuring out your own emotions, figuring out your problems the safety comes from within if you feel safe and confident within yourself, you don’t have to worry about other peoples opinions because their opinions can only hurt you if you allow it you give agency to another person to tell you how to feel. I summarize this in an understandable way. I don’t usually tell people stuff but at least from my research and learning for years now this is what I understand from what he saying.

[@sushmita2013]

​@@DWSP101Beautifully said! ❤😊

[@DWSP101]

@@sushmita2013 was it good? I don’t usually go out of my way to actually talk to people, but was it actually a good summary of what he was trying to convey

[@DWSP101]

@@sushmita2013 was it actually a good summary of what he said?

[@LisaDunahoe]

Brilliant! So glad you got this in writing… can’t wait to read your new book! I am 61, married 39 years, have 4 adult children. I see the truth in what you’re saying. I have many opinions as a mom who in college studied Education and child psychology. I know that respect is the major component even as infants, toddlers, … Respect at every age. I look at each child straight in the eye so I can try to understand the personality when that they are born with. ( not perfect in any way) Also respect from adult to adult is what you are getting to ultimately. I love that. Thank you for your work!!!