The TRUE payoff of HYPERGAMY

[@psychacks]

Does hypergamy pay off for men? In the latest episode of PsycHacks, I dive into the topic of what men don’t understand about female selection. Exploring the recent surge of interest in this subject, I debunk two common misconceptions surrounding hypergamy. Moreover, I provide valuable insights on adopting a more accurate perspective on female selection, emphasizing the mutual benefits that both men and women can derive from accepting the reality of hypergamy. Social: Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks/ Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com/ Spotify: open.spotify.com/show/7fC8zVdbbrIwHOfpEo25qt?si=f78d5a31d4fb4a97 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack’s member community: kzbin.info/door/SduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXwjoin Edits by: @mez Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com Book a paid consultation: oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Sponsor an Episode: oriontarabanpsyd.com/sponsor-an-episode Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #PsycHacks #Dating #FemaleSelection #Psychology

[@SaladaTodoDia]

Does hypergamy pay off for man? And for society? My view, it's very complicated to tell. Have we studied the cascade effect on man? Doctor, how do you relate young men's many negative behavior and hypergamy? Criminality, suicide, despair, violence, etc. In today's scenario hypergamy can be practiced more intensively as there's more access to bigger pool selection via physical means and online.

[@mikey92362]

Hypergamy kept us alive as a species for thousands of years. But today hypergamy is a tool. If you understand how to use it to your advantage, then you can pull in top tier women without needing to have perfect genetics or piles of money. Also, if it weren't for hypergamy, my wife wouldn't have left us after 25 years of marriage. I'd have never realized how much happier I could be! Hypergamy has been a very good friend to me!

[@rejectionistmanifesto8836]

So many millions of foolish men every year globally get divorce and loses more than half their wealth and WORSE they lose their CHILDREN. So hypergamy doesn't benefit these men.

[@earlem9771]

You are your own prize. The hopes of being able to get an attractive good woman drives you to be the best version of you. You are the main beneficiary of this process.

[@edheldude]

That's a very low motivation and cannot sustain you. Women are just women. The sustaining motivations are transcendental: truth, beauty, justice, righteousness etc. If you align yourself with the higher, the lower will sort itself out.

[@zoraster3749]

That’s what marriage (and divorce) does… it guarantees the woman access to that man even after the relationship ends.

[@cobrakaiisback4709]

Which is why marriage rates are plummeting

[@AfriqueNY]

Having a child does that more than marriage. It's the ultimate binding contract that trump's divorce.

[@AfriqueNY]

This is the reason why women work very hard to convince man to marry them and or have children. Once this occurs the man's leverage is gone. Game over.

[@rejectionistmanifesto8836]

So many millions of foolish men every year globally get divorce and loses more than half their wealth and WORSE they lose their CHILDREN. So hypergamy doesn't benefit these men.

[@AdamsDuhStuff]

Not if she stops living....

[@Khan-rz8qi]

The thing that makes men appreciate a woman is when she’s holding him down through the hard times, and when he’s finally up that just strengthens the respect and love he has for her overall. When men go through those hard stages alone and finally get up in life and have leverage, he then enjoys the fruits of his labor. At that point it’ll be hard to truly appreciate a woman because she wasn’t with you when you was at the bottom, but only caught a hold of you when you’re already winning. That element of a woman sticking with a man through thick and thin through the mud was a good motivator for men in their willingness to share and discipline themselves to stick with only one woman. Without that trust and experience, men won’t want to share when they reach to their absolute peaks. Why would they? They worked hard to get here ALONE and you’re going to tell them not to fully enjoy what they’ve worked for? Alot of women don’t realize that their unwillingness to build with a man is only hurting themselves at the end of the day. It’s making men in general more vain. Waiting at the end of the finish line for the winners is doing women absolutely no good. Cause trust me, those winners are gonna thoroughly enjoy what they’ve worked for and rotate these women accordingly.💯💯💯💯

[@nstar1372]

That’s a tricky bet. It’s only fair we don’t take the risk.

[@Khan-rz8qi]

@@nstar1372 I agree. With that being said, if that’s the case fellas move accordingly and enjoy the fruits of your labor. It’s every man for himself.💯

[@VaronPlateando]

exactly, let xx.s cope with the cold or heat | desert or floods out there, if they didn’t bother to qualify for companionship in relevant time. their remainders shall reveal the wreckage of themselves by themselves. they won’t ‚love‘ or ‚empathise‘ by (evo-psych) nature in reverse. thus, indifference, gents.

[@PinkHypatia]

Why assume that the man is done building himself? If he’s under age 50, he’s probably still climbing if he’s ambitious. If his ideal woman didn’t meet him at the bottom, he should feel lucky to have found her when he did, and vice verse. Just marry a feminine equal, instead of someone you feel is beneath you in excellence.

[@Khan-rz8qi]

@@PinkHypatia Hypergamy doesn’t work that way. Men can’t simply date across when women vastly have a preference for dating up. En masse it doesn’t statistically play out like that, it only sounds good in theory. If it was this simple, literally everyone would be in a relationship right now with an “equal” partner.

[@jameskamotho7513]

The last part about "remaining a 10% after losing everything" is more theoretical than practical...

[@phatphil7836]

Yeah, I knew a top 10% guy who killed his wife and himself in front of one of their sons after she filed for divorce to leave him for a top 1% kind of guy.

[@ashlavanadis]

It’s not theoretical because everyone has choice. You can choose to be a top 10% or 1% man at any time in your life by doing the work.

[@giveitatry951]

@@ashlavanadis Not when u look like Golum

[@camilosanchez831]

Money will take many to hell. Jesus will judge.

[@PCSamsung-qp2wv]

​@@ashlavanadis fun fact - only 10% and 1% can be the 10% and 1%. So no, not anyone can make that choice

[@goofywill90]

The journey (the struggles & challenge)is the goal and the results (meeting hypergamy, improvement, & success) are a bonus

[@SkrzekuZenmasters]

Women don't want struggles they want results. Sad because without struggle you never grow and better yourself.

[@erwanlebras9179]

Man's wealth "indirectly" benefits a woman. Dr Orion try to tell that to a family court judge 😂 (even his 401k). I don't wish you a divorce, but it is a good way to learn it. The hard way.

[@aeganratheesh]

He often says dumb takes like these...He never even takes into account other factors like race, lifestyle blah blah blah which women have as a priority

[@Khan-rz8qi]

He isn’t wrong, a man’s wealth can only indirectly benefit a woman because most of the time men CHOOSE to share that wealth. I understand the courts don’t favor men, that’s a whole other subject, but for the most part it’s men who propose and choose to get married, putting themselves in that position. Literally no one is forcing men to share their wealth if they don’t want to. No one can FORCE a man to get married either.

[@aeganratheesh]

@@Khan-rz8qi I guess you haven't heard about Australian laws

[@Khan-rz8qi]

@@aeganratheesh Nah I haven’t. I’m speaking strictly from an American perspective. I’m not sure how things work over there in Australia.

[@aeganratheesh]

@@Khan-rz8qi if your "girlfriend" stays at your home for more than 2 weeks it will be considered as marriage and she can legally sue you when the opportunity is ripe

[@kimpettersson6605]

One fascinating thought is that it's OK for women to look for hypergamy, but if a guy is looking for a woman more fit, educated and beautiful than him, then he's an incel 😅

[@dwdwone]

All that is true. He is the source of the value. As I've grown old, my perception is that wealth and status are not what I value anymore, though I have neither. I hold kindness in the highest regard of all.

[@ebrennie]

Same. But most humans do not. Lots of humans masquerade as kind. Few actually are. Few seek it in partners (though they convince themselves they do). Worse, many assume nefarious motivations now, so being kind is not perceived as a positive trait. It makes one suspicious these days. Clips like this are somewhat comical to me. This guy is telling men all I would care about as a woman is their status, but status is more likely to be an unattractive trait with me, especially if you measure your worth by it. Says a lot about a man’s core essence: what he values, his priorities, and how he likes to waste his very limited time here on things that will not matter in the slightest on his deathbed. Are you going to be thinking, “Gee, Im so glad I landed that deal in 2005!” Or are you going to be thinking, “I should have spent more time being with my life instead of making my life look like it fits in.” I want to build, but I don’t need a damn castle because I’d rather be alive inside my life and marvel at the reality it is even happening at all. Status obsessed, power hungry, wealth seeking men do not understand this worldview. It’s completely foreign to them. Finding another human who has their value system on straight seems impossible these days. We share the fate of the Siberian tigers. We’re a flavor of human at risk of extinction because there are so few of us we never cross paths with each other.

[@milesnicholas597]

Modern women search for tall, rich, fit, confident, similar age, monogamous guys. That’s not the top 10%, that’s the 0.1%

[@VJ592]

Eating, Mating, sleeping arrangements and defensive/offensive strategies are in animal life they execute this with zero effort. Man's preoccupation should not be at the level of the animal but with Self and God realization.

[@edheldude]

And focusing on women takes a man away from this mission.

[@GregoryMatthewKlimczak-z7j]

Bro, there is no self. It is an illusion we create. Brother, please, please read something anything on anatta and fix that fucked up view.

[@ClanDragonas]

This take is pollyannish at best. When a man marries a woman he is giving her the power to leave and take half without needing any reason or fault.

[@psychacks]

Exactly. The man gives it to the woman. If he doesn't, she doesn't have it.

[@AfriqueNY]

​@@psychacks I am glued to your posts Doc. Your level of intellectualism is greatly appreciated. I would love to see you tackle the topic of leverage in dating benefiting the man (access to sex without having to provide security) vs leverage in marriage benefiting the women. Thank you.

[@heyoka33]

​@@psychacksThen for her it's not a secondary benefit( his resources) it's primary, unless you can point to something that would trump that as primary for her?( You probably can't)

[@ethosterros9430]

​@@AfriqueNYjesus you're lost if you think blind rationalizations is intellectual

[@AfriqueNY]

@@heyoka33 i can. Emotional Availability. Any woman can get sex. Getting an attractive (to her) man to really care and listen and be a true friend is extremely difficult to obtain.

[@melenico4512]

The top 10% of men just put women on rotation.

[@LadislausMarguspa]

play stupid games, win stupid prizes

[@redpilljesus]

How exactly does this apply?

[@YourEvolvedDoomer]

It's funny cuz women want the man only after he's built himself, but a man who built himself alone will simply not look at women in the way you'd hope. Nobody was there for him when he was at the bottom, he might have been taken advantage of, so why should he be there for someone else when he's at the top? It's his turn to use others now.

[@SPOCK_TALK]

Why would a Top Tier Man or any Man be Foolish enough to bet his Work, Wealth, Status, and Reputation by giving a woman power over these things. Smart Men don't get Married.

[@MaxBelousovGG]

If this doesn't resonate with you.. you haven't been there. Life will teach you. Or not.

[@maxsparks5183]

The benefits obtained by the “top 10%” come at a hell of a price for the other 90%. Ain’t life grand?

[@nealmccoy5727]

Exactly. Everything in RP revolves around the top 10%. No one wants to take well being of other 90% into account. It's a very elitist, "let them eat cake" type of view.

[@n-tertainmentx-tended4760]

@@nealmccoy5727 The top 10 percent are playing by the rules that women set up in the first place. They are pawns like all other men.

[@Leoo117]

Thats how you know the people that always mention the top 10 or 1 percent based on money and status have no clue what they are talking about. Tons of dudes in that 90 percent range attract the woman they want because they understand attraction. Even if they don't understand it, they are doing things right and are attracting a woman they want, and it has nothing to do with their money and status. People that are hoping everything is based on money and status will always ignore that fact though, which keeps them stunted.

[@alienkishorekumar]

​@@Leoo117sure whatever makes you sleep at night 😂

[@anthonycasso8279]

This is absolutely true

[@chill_dude_743]

You should rename the vid as "How to cope as a top 10% cu*k"

[@aeganratheesh]

hahahaha

[@zdravkomomci7570]

Yes true, would be less views with that heading and he knows it

[@theezenriarinze9203]

As long as men have a choice we will always win.

[@edwhite2255]

Amazing insight and so true. Work on ourselves and our careers and we will benefit in every way

[@jros4057]

My value can't even be represented without an "i" next to it. I'm not even on the same number line. I'm the guy cthulhu's woman tells him not to worry about.

[@Jesse-qk1uy]

The following MenTaL Box perspective delving deeper into male character development: Dignified Man vs Undignified Man/Red Pill Mindset: A Dignified man will make his money honestly not hurting anyone in the process, and will not bait outwardly beautiful women into his orbit that will not love and respect him for his character. He falls from time to time, but always has a conscience if any of his actions hurt others in the process. An Undignified man will make his fortune and power play even if it is unethical and hurts others in the process. He will also keep outwardly beautiful women in his life as trophies, not seeing their inner beauty. He will not see the depth of character in himself or anyone else, and have a lack of conscience in how his actions affect others.

[@ronmexico5908]

It’s the standing next to someone’s lambo strategy😅 Very well thought out

[@thenewdrugno3660]

The most hypergamous woman is the best brand ambassador that is well rewarded for her efforts. If the brand that you promote, honor, add value to, and represent well pays you more as it gains more value is what a wise hypergamous woman is likened to. Young hypergamous women should be looking for the next big tech company, while older woman should be looking to be connected to a big brand and accept their lot in life. The top that most of the women want has the ability to make them share and not the other way around

[@123pb]

Basically, the man is the prize

[@faberofwillandmight]

Not really. Men control access to relationships, and women control access to sex. If a man gives a woman access to a relationship, that is vulnerability and trust, especially in marriage. The "prize" is the relationship, and that needs both parties. If you are a man, your goal or prize is the woman; if you are a woman, the man is your goal or prize.

[@earlem9771]

You are your own prize

[@vtmegrad98]

I'd like this video more if I was a top 10% man, instead of top 20% at best.

[@VaronPlateando]

… put as in beginning above, gents may profit from hypergamy even without any xx.s involved - but indirectly, as I see it. Because he directly profits from investing in himself for which to work a reference to an externel validation instance is despensible. if indifference to xx.s is reached, self-care l validation l preservation and respect are still in any gent’s reach, fundamentally at least. Of course quite some gents undergo considerable wear | tear | harm in life… which may somewhat hamper healthy self-reference, individually. but generally, xx.s may constitute nothing more than ‘nice-to-haves’ (0un intended) and not ends per se.

[@bloodspartan300]

Wasn't sure what to make of this take.... but as people are pointing out in the comments it was a bad take.

[@MVProfits]

Make that 5% instead of 10%. And with modern divorce or even separation laws, the access to the mam's resources can be enforced and not theoretical But that is, if the woman "got" that man. We know most women will gladly go for those 5% guys, easily giving them all out access, but few will keep them for more than a very short time ha ha. Yet they will try again and again, and say "what are the good men gone" while ignoring the many around them.

[@Charlie-m6r5v]

Then what is the point of relationships?

[@arthurcurry3212]

I just kinda realized a few things I've seen people do. I saw that some people leave their partners because of money. That's not even the worst. People leave each other because they just got bored? Kids suffer

[@zenden6564]

Be that as it may, if you're middle class, i.e., which starts just below "the mythical top ten % guy," then divorce will destroy you. Divorce takes a thousand forms. In Australia, after a divorce, an ex-wife can come back years later if she has squandered her first settlement and if you've rebuilt your equity, then get another big chunk of it. Tragic.

[@sheltonbrown601]

Such a rich explanation.

[@christhesingledad8799]

Thanks I needed to hear that. Now that I’m at the bottom the only way is up.

[@uncharted4076]

This man is a genius

[@jonathanvermillion7263]

Wow!

[@UCanHaveHim]

Ladies, don't get pregnant. Get a job in tech or medicine and go on with your life.

[@groopmmex]

Yep, I am the prize, no shitski. "I'll come running to tie (her) shoes," but it NO matter quite often. The ladies often don't get it these days, just MORE and me, me, me. "I'm the prize" flips it quite well for this time we live in IMHO. What I have can be taken from me. Who I am, cannot be taken from me. Yep, kids can even be "taken" away via what is called parental alienation.

[@MrTimbo1111]

This young man is saying that a woman's hypergamy make you a better man and that stays with you regardless of what she does. Your skills and mindset remain after the brutal divorce r*pe

[@nikeisagreekgoddess4135]

Yeah, the man you are at that point is what matters. No matter what is taken away from you by life's many injustices.

[@nikeisagreekgoddess4135]

You must be unwise to disagree with where the real value is contained. Money and status are just signals, the real value exists within the man that transcended himself over and over again to be better. Hypergamy is the evolutionary strategy employed by women to find such virtuous man. Men lie, are simps and women lie and are unstable. Things are very complex for everyone involved. I can appreciate the attitude of focusing on what you can do, which is aiming at your betterment with honesty. No matter which storm comes your way, becoming better matters more. It should also be obvious that Teraban's top 10% concept is far more sophisticated than "gotta look like Momoa with Musk money". Humans have plenty of competence hierarchies where all sorts of talents can lead to high status. This should allow you to embrace your interests and give you soul-nourishing motivation. The only question I am left with is: how should you approach life when you fail to become top 10%? Leaving aside the external validation, what is the proper internal dialogue with yourself? I doubt he has valuable insight on that regard. He appears to only see successful men. Kind of blind imo.

[@doyoueatrocks]

And this is why men are better than women. Because we put in the effort. We also look better

[@christhesingledad8799]

To test hypergamy for a man all he needs is success to test it in his woman just take away the success of the man. Results may differ due to regions by up to %10 but not limited to that

[@thewhopper411]

No such thing as a trophy wife...only a trophy husband.

[@LionKimbro]

That's some serious cope. Here's how I know: Gay men LOVE their sex lives. The sex life of a gay man is extraordinary, compared to the jail that men live in. And I see successful gay men all the time. It turns out, all of that hypergamy and pickiness? There's nothing noble about it at all. It's just suffering for men. It doesn't make 10% of men exceptional, because there's exceptional gay men as well. It just makes life hard and difficult and painful.

[@nikeisagreekgoddess4135]

I understand your point, if female approval is a non-factor for gay men, then why are there highly successful gay men? Here's why: Gay men are biologically identical to straight men. They are governed by the same hormones and the only difference are their interests. Moreover, gay men can be masculine too, so they are as ambitious, competitive and interested in the same things straight men are. We are a binary species. The ones with the dick share overarching attributes that were evolved for the purpose of reproduction, whether or not there are male inviduals with no interest in offspring and only care about homosexual behavior. You are making a cultural observation on a behavior that is governed by biology.

[@LionKimbro]

@@nikeisagreekgoddess4135 Yes. You understand my point, completely. Yes, yes, yes. Gay men and Straight men are the same. The only difference is who they are attracted to. Where there is a difference in straight men from gay men, it is because they are hypnotized and self-hypnotized in the psychological force field (Kurt Lewin) that exists between men and women. But gay men are free from that psychological force field. When women feel that they are not the targets of male sexual desire, they even can rather admire it. So straight women celebrate and encourage male sexuality, when it shows up in the gay man. But the very same feelings and thoughts and activities in straight men, they treat with absolute disdain, fear, and disgust. And straight men know this -- and they feel its effects even as young boys. But the straight man and the gay man are, at root, the same. Identical.

[@johndiaz5925]

I don’t agree with this point.. it’s very weak

[@karlmm8738]

I lose it, I will come back one way or another.

[@expatwealthasia8702]

Interesting

[@EriPages]

CORRECT. This is what i've been saying We must be HAPPY for hypergamy.

[@LallanAlexHockstetter]

I wish u were my therapist dude

[@gyver471]

Na I disagree with this he must not have gone through the divorce grinder.

[@Anthony-dj4nd]

Shouldn't have gotten married in the 1st place.....

[@WWlogics]

I don’t get it 😂

[@bobborlog1677]

Never marry

[@Wilk-Wilk]

Today's women hipergamy is just toxic.

[@Bobafe77a]

A giga chad

[@Nuhopoclik1]

Holy shit; this is it!

[@GregoryMatthewKlimczak-z7j]

I feel you skirt the razor's edge of toxic masculinity. I want to like you, and I find many of your ideas/observations/ideology on-point, though it seems your window is slightly tinted with toxic masculinity - so I find myself conflicted. Additionally, as an autistic person, I see your incongruencies, of which there are many. hmmm... complex apes we are!

[@ethosterros9430]

Not toxic masculinity. Brain dead cluelessness. His audience was built up with reading off of a series of old blog posts verbatim and now hes trying to sell his own rationalizations. The fact that when its him speaking his own words ot comes off as idiotic drivel unfit to be considered a complete human thought says everything people need to know about who he really is, just another charlatan.

[@ethosterros9430]

@Finnhungambar hes just parroting the red pill side bar. Hes probably not even a doctor. I'm as red pilled as they come but guys like these reading off a script for KZbin money are a dime a dozen now. The ones that actually worth a damn want to see a change in the world rather than just bending over and accepting the status quo

[@AWeeCuntfromLiverpool]

You didn't have to tell us you're autistic. We knew

[@setaripantheon8801]

Hypergamy = Bad for Whamen. Got you Captain O!

[@jacksonscully2537]

You've basically just proven hypergamy doesn't actually exist.

[@UCanHaveHim]

Ladies, don't get pregnant. Get a job in tech or medicine and go on with your life.