Why humans are surprisingly bad at being happy | Laurie Santos

[@raymondtendau2749]

The happiness Essentials 1.Something to Do. 2.Something or someone to love. 3.Something to hope for. -Ikigae

[@The-Well]

Another great quote 😊

[@neco5740]

Over time I have learned that my number one tell whether I get depression is whether I move enough. And that simply moving about, sit down in the park and even just do the same as at home, that is stare at my phone, is immensity helpful. Really, minimal movement and good light are such simple things and do so much

[@Wabbelpaddel]

In the park you breathe in phytoncides from the bushes and trees. They are natural antidepressants. That explains the correlation between urbanicity and psychiatric pathology.

[@deadinside8781]

​@@Wabbelpaddel i always thought the reason I could breathe better around a large cluster of trees was because of them filtering the air. 10/10 plants and animals make better humans.

[@The-Well]

Absolutely! Just moving around is also really underrated as far as staying healthy, too. We did some videos on our parent channel (Big Think) recently with Harvard's Daniel Lieberman recently regarding misconceptions about exercise. kzbin.info/www/bejne/pGekqKaMfK93hbs

[@TheNiteinjail]

Getting out does one other thing immediately... It solves the dilemma of WHAT to do about it... On a certain level anything you try to make yourself feel better could work a bit... Just because you're trying.

[@tonyasmith1271]

"I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point: if this isnt nice, I dont know what is." - Kurt Vonnegut He also said something along the lines of "what a shame it is to be happy and not even notice" I read this when i was in high school and that mentality has sustained me through my life so far

[@The-Well]

Wonderful quote. And it's a testament to it that it's stuck with and helped you for so long!

[@LordBrittish]

My two favorite quotes are from different sources. The first is from Socrates and says, “The only true wisdom is in knowing that you know nothing.” -Socrates The other source may sound a bit silly, but it’s from a Star Wars novel. “It matters. It matters which side we choose. Even if there will never be more Light than Darkness, Even if there can be no more joy in the galaxy than there is pain, For every action we undertake, For every word we speak, For every life we touch, It matters. I don’t turn towards the Light because it means someday I’ll win some cosmic game, I turn towards it because it is the Light.” -Qui-Gon Jin “Master & Apprentice” by Claudia Gray

[@ThingsILove2266]

This woman is incredibly easy to listen to- I love her sense of calm.

[@alexiaz00z]

I want to marry her :)

[@michaelhartmann1285]

Looks like she takes her own advice.

[@kimstacks]

This is a great video by a knowledgeable expert. So I made this quick summary. Enjoy!~ At 1:27 4 annoying features of mind that make us bad at being happy 1. intuitions (we think X makes us happy, but we are wrong) 2. reference points (even when we do well objectively, we compare ourselves to other people doing better, we feel bad) 3. hedonic adaptation (even when something makes us happy, over time we get used to it.) 4. impact bias ( we overestimate how long and how much specific events or outcomes make us happy) At 4:00 we can rewire our minds in 5 ways. Aka 5 rewirements: 1. social connection (spend time with other people. Undersociality - we underestimate the impact on how much social connection affects our happiness. As an introvert, I will add that I also keep forgetting how happy I feel when I take part in social activities that I do enjoy with people I like. Also personally, this should also be under the annoying feature.) 2. Other-orientedness (doing nice things for other people. We think more self-care is important for happiness. But actually happy people spend more time helping other people and donating more money to other people.) 3. Gratitude (focus on blessings not the negatives in life. Simple technique is write down 3-5 things grateful for every night) 4. Savoring (paying attention to the good stuff in life. that nice latte you just mindlessly gulped down writing emails. You be happier if you can savor it and pay attention to the richness of the taste) 5. EXercise (we forget that minds are embodied. Minds are connected to our bodies, so we should move ard more)

[@subhodeepghosh7190]

Several decades of research about happiness in a nutshell within 9 minutes. Loved it.wonderful.

[@The-Well]

So glad you found it helpful. Thanks for sharing!

[@zenastronomy]

completely ignores the artificial life we've built of 50hr work week, clocks, schedules, bills, chores, artificial lighting, disturbed sleep, processed food, etc. if you take a fish out of water, it isn't going to be happy.

[@jonr6680]

So so true. She is great, but so saturated in the USA young urban well-off mindset. Which is actually a tiny minority in global context.

[@logan-vq3dm]

everyone says you should love yourself before you love another, but loving others is just easier than loving yourself

[@emmathomas4536]

I have to say, daily gratitude practice saved me from anorexia… not my psychologist Writing down 3 pieces of gratitude using apps was so practical and life changing

[@breal7277]

The happiest I've been in life was when I was walking daily on a beautiful nature trail with a cousin that I loved dearly. I felt connected, healthy, and at peace. Exercise did what meds could not. So whenever I feel gloomy, I go for a walk and my sadness disappears like magic.

[@nomodusproject7211]

She's my online lecturer in Coursera - The Science of Well-Being. Love her so much.

[@maryann6800]

I think another annoying feature of the mind is it's tendency to remember bad things from the past like regrets, guilt, embarrassments, shame, loss etc, whereas I think if we could learn to train our thoughts to focusing more on the present and the future it would make us happier, it's just easier said than done sometimes, when those thoughts creep in.

[@maryann6800]

@@armeen5743 I think the only real thing that matters is just being present in the moment since really neither the past nor the future actually even exist, and the present is all there is that's real, and if we can stay present and positive in the moment, the future takes care of itself. I just hate the intrusive thoughts of mistakes and trauma of the past that our brain seems to always want to go back to, and yeah worrying about the future is not really helpful either unless we can frame it in a positive light.

[@insankamil2909]

a philosopher said, there is nothing wrong bout missery, or disaster. it's just a part of life. u'd not notice the situation will be changed to happiness and luck. of course u have some control over some particular thing. there is one thing u experience that is the moment you realise something changed, it's your awareness & consciousness

[@modiddymo]

Remarkable how much modern research is validating ancient wisdom. We’ve created a society that believes new is good and old is bad. Have we really evolved emotionally beyond our ancestors of 500 years ago or 1000 years ago? Why do we eschew centuries of cumulative philosophy and worship our own modern selves to our own detriment? I’m not saying we take ancient wisdom unquestioned, but it baffles my mind how we keep repeating history because we’re too busy to look back at where we came from.

[@ey67]

True

[@HeatherHolt]

I blame social media for most of the unhappiness people feel, especially teenagers and young adults. Comparing yourself to highly styled and curated posts from “influencers” is awful. And most of all, no one ever wants to be content with who and where they are and what they have. Everyone always wants something more, something new. When is it ever enough??

[@pdxdogg6891]

I strive to be content. I believe to be truly content. We need each of us to being doing ok.

[@Victor_Fontenele]

Happiness practices: Social connection Other-Orientedness Gratitude Savoring Exercise

[@bhatkat]

I'm now 66 and have been working in these directions for half of my life. And can assure you that shutting down the comparison game is quite doable indeed, I attacked this problem with the cognitive behavioral technique and was quite delighted with the excellent results. I have a classic text on envy that examines the subject in many cultures but he seems to have little optimism about controlling it. My experience tells me otherwise as it hasn't been a problem in decades now. Using this and other techniques has improved my life considerably in multiple ways, would take a lot of paper to write it all up.

[@amitavaroy4709]

Can you share the link

[@hoe2785]

I have recently strived consciously to regulate my ego massively and I feel significantly happier. We don’t realise how much ego invades on almost every aspect of our lives (dependant on how egotistical by nature you are 😂).

[@sarahfranco6802]

Oh wow

[@EvolvedBonobo]

​@@hoe2785 You might enjoy the book "Ego is the Enemy" by Ryan Holliday

[@The-Well]

Thanks so much for sharing. Love to see people learning from each other.

[@bernardoruche8042]

To be fair she's mostly right but the rewirements are how people are actually wired to be. It's the artificiality of our present age that makes it seem different. But growing as a kid when there weren't smartphones we played with our friends all the time, we enjoyed everyday uniquely while doing mostly the same thing. And weirdly enough I grew up happy.. I'm just realizing these rewirements are baked into the behavior I've had my entire life, so much so that even in Uni people keep asking me how I'm happy while stuff keeps getting tougher. I've always had friends I hang out with and communicate with despite being sorta introverted, I play sports (that's where I get most of my friends from), I always have something I'm working on and an actual job(where I get the rest of my friends from) and I try to make sure I'm not on the phone too much. Anyday I spend too long on Netflix, I just become unhappy, low energy and useless the rest of the day. So I try to start the day well because I noticed how I start a day plays a role in how the day goes.

[@MindWorld]

Finding the balance between financial stability and self-actualization is a lifelong journey!!!) Your video is great!!👍

[@ZachTheMaker]

I saw the title for this video and thought that's not true I'm pretty much always happy. Then I watched and I have always done everything on that list. I would like to add two additional things. One I eat chocolate nonstop, Im talking first thing in the morning, throughout the day, before bed. Might be a constant dopamine fix? Two I completely believe the world is deterministic. What happens will happen and couldn't have happened any other way.

[@jonr6680]

Chocolate is caffeine, fat and sugar mostly. The unholy trinity of anti-health... So getting off that disease inducing garbage is a good first step.

[@amanr6346]

I’m retraining as a Psychotherapist, and Prof Santos work on happiness is such a delight to read about! Absolutely love the Happiness lab!

[@The-Well]

Awesome to hear! Good luck!

[@logan-vq3dm]

bro im so tired of that argument, like money is not what gives you happiness, its the freedom and opportunities that money provides are what opens the doors to happiness

[@bazinga489]

Everyone talks about the "art" of happiness. Happiness is not about art. It's about educate our perspectives. Thank you for raising awareness about it.

[@diplomatamaravilhosa2813]

… which is art lol

[@bazinga489]

@@diplomatamaravilhosa2813 how do you define art?

[@bazinga489]

@@diplomatamaravilhosa2813 to me, art doesn't involve education or to educate. I am against to some ancient philosophers here. If art involved education, we couldn't call it "art". Art has far more different effects and aims than education does. Art is subjective but education methods are objective. Here, I wanted to point out that there are scientific methods to improve our happiness. And I don't think it's about art. Honestly, I am a student of Cinema and TV department. I know the differences between art and education.

[@njumera]

@@bazinga489 Historically art was seen as a didactical method though. Post-modern art, or " l’art pour l’art" is quite contemporary. It seems dumb to for an educational institution to label most historical art as "not art" because it had didactical intentions, especially one that focuses on explicitly manipulating people (i.e., cinema and TV).

[@Justineyedia]

Kegley's Principle of Change: It is easier to behave your way into a new way of thinking than to think your way into a new way of behaving. It's easier to act your way into new ways of feeling than to feel yourself into new ways of acting. We can behave ourselves into new ways of thinking more than we can think our way into new ways of behaving. The reason for this is because our consciousness succumbs all too easily to unconscious influences, and these are often truer and wiser than our conscious thinking. We adapt to our environment more easily than we can have our environment adapt to us. Ultimately, we are not what we think. We are what we do, not what we think or say we will do.

[@jonr6680]

The gold is always in the comments, thanks for this!

[@Bearkat87]

I believe that the structure of our workweek/careers, virtually consuming the entirety of people’s most vital years, the way money works nowadays, and the powerlessness we feel re: doing anything about the status quo lead to this. Everything just gets more and more expensive, we are force fed how divided we are (falsely) and that everything we feel and do is wrong and offending someone. Overall I feel we are purposely driven by fear, overstimulated, and hyper-compared to everyone else in society constantly. Truly modern life has only emerged in the last 30 years (the difference in living in 1925 vs 1955 can’t even compare to living in 1990 vs 2020, IMO), and we’re doing 100,000 years of catching up.

[@dragonmaster909]

I'm thankful she explained this in simple words

[@danielvalvo5562]

Almost all of these things were discussed and dealt with by stoic and Buddhist philosophers 1000s of years ago. Most of our feelings and experiences aren’t new and people back then went through the trouble of writing down what they figured out so we don’t have to start at 0. Let’s use that!

[@jonr6680]

Yes but they didn't live in a toxic hell. With Starbucks Apple and doughnuts tempting them on every corner.

[@St.Calamity]

​@@jonr6680 especially the street hookers

[@SoulconversationDuo]

@@jonr6680 what? They lived in the most brutal times in history. Life now is literally paradise compared to when they lived.

[@Jixzl]

Well done! I think this video is going to blow up. Adding chapters might accelerate this. I practiced gratitude and it made me feel happier, but then the Hedonic adaptation kicked in. 😬

[@thewb8329]

Our expectations are inversely related to our happiness. Also if we focus on meeting our needs instead of what we want at the neglect of our needs leads to more misery.

[@michaelhartmann1285]

The steps to making life better are very simple and powerful.

[@logan-vq3dm]

i hate that the most, because i literally dont compare myself to others, but people i care about compare me to others and then that makes me feel bad

[@vaishnavisk8197]

Very true Every single thing said in here is awesome which connects to the real life The way she portrayed it is simply amazing

[@julesjay1634]

being happy is the opposite of being sad, you don't want your emotions to swing this high, what you should thrive for is contentment :)

[@ministeriotsebaoth9374]

Really appreciate the intention of sharing this video!

[@kdbin101-1]

This channel is so good! Thanks for giving a platform for all these interesting people :)

[@The-Well]

So glad you're enjoying it! More to come - stay tuned :)

[@Robinson8491]

#6 stop drinking alcohol Instant increase in general happiness and feelings of bliss

[@mohammadkhalili7562]

I'm really happy that I've subscribed "The Well" youtube channel :)

[@raymondtendau2749]

For success like happiness cannot be pursued. It must ensue. And it only does so as the unintended side effects of ones personal dedication to a cause greater than one's self. -Victor Frankl

[@The-Well]

Great quote!

[@theintrovertedaspie9095]

We are wired to seek or create happiness. Everyone wants to live a happy and fulfilling life. Happiness is the goal. Every other emotion is just the side affects, or the extras.

[@divyanshsharma]

Quick Summary: Sadly, humans aren’t wired for happiness. Natural selection doesn’t care how we feel. But we can change that. Annoying features of our minds: 1. Intuition: We tend to think that happiness can be bought with material possessions. That’s miswanting. 2. Reference points: We often find ourselves comparing to others, even if we are better off objectively. That’s a wrong reference. 3. Hedonic adaption: Even awesome things can become dull with time. 4. Impact bias: We overestimate the length or intensity of happiness that major events will create. How to overcome annoying features of the mind? 1. Be sociable: Happy people are more social. They engage with friends, colleagues on a regular basis. 2. Other-orientedness: Do nice things to other people. Science evidence that being altruistic (not at the cost of our own joy) brings more purpose and happiness in our lives. 3. Gratitude: Happy people have a strong tendency to focus on blessings over problems. 4. Savoring: Attending and appreciating positive experiences like a flavorful dish can significantly improve our happiness levels. 5. Exercise: Body movements can change how we feel. You don’t have to run a marathon; a leisurely walk in neighborhood gardens can uplift your mood. Remember: Consider your negative emotions as indicators of change. Rather than trying to eliminate them, we should learn to regulate them in positive ways and implement the strategies mentioned above to make significant changes in our levels of happiness.

[@cleft_3000]

Having come from no money, having so much I wanted for nothing (and being the most lost & empty I’ve ever felt) now back to instability…I’ve thankfully learned that lesson and couldn’t care less about what others have. Do I have some things I need to improve absolutely but it’s all practically oriented. I disagree wholeheartedly about the connection part. Again, I used to have a large group of friends and it always felt fake. I was betrayed by my long term best friend because of envy. Now I have a tiny circle & that I appreciate time with, but cannot wait to return to my interests. In short - *most* humans are shit. And it’s not their (nor my fault) its near impossible to behave in any other manner given the context of how society is today. To say differently is at best magical thinking & at worst straight up dishonest. The earlier you learn, make peace with this the better. Stopped using social media about 7 years ago. I now sometimes wish I did more in order to follow certain topics etc however I forget about it, almost instantly! About this I am not sad nor regretful or lonely whatsoever. I don’t deliberately close myself away, I just have absolutely no expectations of others & that feels liberating 🙂 Sounds silly but nature and animals is what I hold closest to me now. After a long period of breakdown & recovery, it’s like the world is now more vivid and I notice so much more about nature, especially animal behaviours, colours etc Nature is what saved me from the abyss, not a doctor, nor any other human for that matter. A dog and beautiful Mother Nature which is why I am committed to reinvesting basically everything back into conservation when my bank balance returns to its rightful place…plump, fat n happy 😂

[@mukeshdhotre3161]

Really liked the video and it was good to know some measures through video. Thankyou 😊

[@The-Well]

You’re welcome 😊

[@cornellcutie1]

This is like a Cliffnotes overview of Laurie's class The Science of Well Being which I highly recommend taking on Coursea.

[@insankamil2909]

a philosopher said, there is nothing wrong bout missery, or disaster. it's just a part of life. u'd not notice the situation will be changed to happiness and luck. of course u have some control over some particular thing. there is one thing u experience that is the moment you realise something changed, it's your awareness & consciousness

[@nobody983]

Happiness doesn't exist. It is a marketing strategy by the capitalist system. What we actually want to achieve is the state which Greeks called, Ataraxia, - a state of bliss where all suffering and worries disappear and you just exist. When we have a desire, what we actually want is to get rid of the anxiety coming due to the unfulfillment of the desire. So, we pursue the desire in order to get the desire out of the system, however, it only lasts momentarily. The problem is not that we desire wrong things but the desire itself.

[@jonathanfonti]

The Buddhist tradition also has similar principles. For instance, the idea of Nirvana.

[@whightspace]

And how does one achieve this state of bliss?

[@TheRealSaintNickNorthside]

Youre just playing with semantics.

[@LeanAndMean44]

No, happiness is a feeling, caused by different hormones. I agree with the rest.

[@carlosr192]

Desire I think, it is a projection of a better future state of being but the good felling don't last without gratitude. To feel good is important have less things...because that way you can see better the big victories.

[@Deus_ex_lucifina]

This is such a lovely video - and so in line with the journey to be happier that I’ve been on. Therapy and meditation has helped a lot, and I’m both shocked and empowered to learn that the ways I’ve been slowly building habits that better serve me are scientifically backed, and not solely my own experience. I love it. Thank you for this. This channel deserves more attention! Keep going!

[@The-Well]

So glad you found it helpful - and thank you for sharing. We've got plenty more great stuff in the pipeline, so stay tuned :)

[@GowriGoli]

The mind thinks its job is to focus on problems. So, it does its job perfectly and makes us ignore everything we have and makes us go after what we do not have.

[@MegaFunkified]

This is a life saver for me right now.

[@hermdcurie3275]

I took her course on coursera. It was the best thing I ever did.

[@JasonLee-pr4sx]

Excellent, that's exactly consistent with what I learned through my nearly 50 years of life.

[@erindabney2758]

Did gratitude journaling every single day for six months. Result = anger and deepening depression and realization of how many more things I’m not grateful about. Gratitude journaling only felt good the day I burned my journal and allowed myself to not do it anymore.

[@Splashstar216]

I'm literally a voluntary hermit. My husband and I are spiritual vegans and our perfect lives are living in a secluded rural private animal sanctuary across the world in south africa. That's the dream we're both aiming for. 💚

[@_understatedd]

Incredibly put forward! Thank you!

[@jellevg-x4u]

It’s interesting how the system we live in is rapidly changing in the opposite direction of what we truly want/need. Collective illusions power the system to move in that undesirable way until we all become more honest and authentic in expressing what we truly want. Growing up in this timeperk is both exhausting and exciting. I think we will live through times of fundamental change, its something to look forward to. Perhaps we, as humans, will finally look inward.

[@anna_laxmi_food1921]

Quite interesting video, I've never ever thought of rewiring my brain for happiness I thought success was a result of it, in reality Happiness in doing things leads to success 😊

[@The-Well]

You can do it!

[@3coins.]

All people are not the same. Some people are 10’s and get really happy. Some folks are happy at 5. First accept yourself for who you are.

[@ronjones1414]

Learning contentment is an amazing journey.

[@douwefeitsma1555]

Thank you! This genuinely helped give me another view towards an important topic :)

[@The-Well]

Glad it was helpful! Cheers!

[@theologytherapist]

Love this video! The human experience isn't linear and there is not just one singular path that everyone takes. Rewiring ourselves is something that takes time to do and is not easy!

[@carolinejohnson9165]

However it is possible

[@logan-vq3dm]

youre right, once you get what you want you wont be satisfied, but id argue its more so because humans inherently crave more, not just because its the wrong thing. Like it will never be enough, once you reach your goal, youll acclimate to the new life, then youll set another goal to reach and the cycle will continue

[@sknight9961]

I love the suggestion to “savor” experiences. :)

[@tracyteichman901]

I would inverse the rewirement order - our nervous system will always override cognition.

[@userMB1]

I watch KZbin videos for at least 2 hours every day and 4 hours every weekend, mostly informational videos. Maybe 2 or 3 times a year i get to watch a video that i put in 'Favorites' to watch many times. This is 1 of those videos

[@Fear_Therapy]

This is very informative! Thank you for this video ❤

[@Paramsreya123]

"You might assume we humans that are built to be happy, but the sad thing is we are really not wired for happiness. Natural selection does not care how we feel, it really wants us to just survive and reproduce and does not necessarily involve being happier." This is true.

[@rashidabaakza8554]

🙏Very beautiful and informative research and studies about happiness. 😊👌 Once in a week, trying 2/5 ( rewirements ) surely works. 🤞

[@EmilioBaldi]

As long as there is health there is everything; and I live in a country with good free health care. At most you can "buying off unhappiness".

[@djayjp]

"We want the wrong things." This pretty much defines our society.

[@Feliciations]

Being present !

[@Lizzymint]

I agree but from an early age we are programmed through media and tv that if we have these thing we'd be happier all advertisements are designed to make you think you need something or are missing out if your life will be better for buying because the jonses next door have these things and they seem happy ,its a ploy and we play into their hands . Its not until your a little older do you realise that you dont need to be surrounded by all these clothes, shoes, the latest gadget in the home or choosing a life style that doent really fit who you are. People are constantly striving for happiness and they think if they dont fit a certain criteria then they can't possibly be hapoy. Happiness comes from within, being thankful for what you have not what you havent got. You dont need lots of money, i dont im content with what i have but i was in that trap, for a while it causes more anxiety and stress. After all even though it sounds morbid whatever you buy or aquire throughout life you never own it forever,its a lease because you cant take it with you when you die, you only have to look at the pharohs and ancient civilization taking all their worldly and very expensive items to their buriel ground with them to take into the next life, theyre mosly in museums now. So what im saying is be content with a few key pieces in you home that you get enjoyment from i have Victorian and art nouveau pieces just a few ,infact all of my things will go on to have another life when im gone. Little things bring me great happiness,my life hasnt been easy at all ,many tragic episodes and health problems but do you know what, i am happy because im thankful .There are people out there living the most frightening existence i remind myself of that ,what ive lived with, pales into insignificance. Life isnt supposed to be a bed of roses ,just take a look at human civilization it never has been and never will be.

[@punithgowdaj9756]

I took her course in Coursera. I felt really good

[@xsparik]

Happiness is based on aesthetics. Beauty of emotions & material things.

[@harrydaplatypus361]

For miswanting, how do we know when we want the wrong things?

[@timanspach]

I’d put exercise as number one. Exercise is still more effective than any depression or anxiety medication and much less side effects than meds:)

[@dominiquemathews8617]

I think intuition is not the right word. Assumption is a better fit. Intuition is a connection to infinite intelligence and is very accurate.

[@Killerkey1863]

This was really helpful. Thank you truly.

[@diskopartizan0850]

This needs sharing widely.

[@ComradeSulomon]

You can't discuss happiness without defining what it is.

[@ghaafil_]

Thankuuu✨✨✨

[@everybodyyogastudio212]

#3 sounds like #2 with added bragging rights 😂

[@samyb2834]

There’s a difference between happiness and contentment

[@MTurner504]

The key to a better live begins with making better choices throughout your day: SCENERIO: Your day starts with you getting out of bed and immediately you stub your toe really hard. From that moment you can make one of 2 choices.... CHOICE 1. is you experience that crappy moment and keep it to yourself and the pain will fade and the day isn't ruined due to a uncomfortable start. or CHOICE 2. In your uncomfortable emotional state, you choose to start texting people and posting online how upset you are you stubbed your toe along with other similar complaints you recall in your negative mindset. Throughout the day, you continually recall the uncomfortable emotions experienced due to the stubbed toe OVER AND OVER everytime you see the post or engagements from it or replies from the texts. Why chose to relive uncomfortable emotions endlessly when you could just 🎵LET IT GOOOOO ...LET IT GOOOO 🎵

[@HigherMid]

It’s just not attainable for someone to say live poorly cause that’s where you’re at 🤷🏽‍♂️ strive but bet at your own risk ⚠️.

[@frncscbtncrt]

You wanna be happy and find meaning? Have children. Nothing can ever replace that feeling.

[@kas12324]

Does not apply to many people though. If there is meaning/purpose of life, then we should ask The Creator of life Himself. Otherwise, the meaning varies from one person to another. Having children is probably one of them but definitely not the main purpose of life.

[@kwesttttt]

Sounds like the last thing I would do to find happiness

[@HamletsMill25920]

Ah yes, bring more souls who did not consent, into this clown world. No wonder anti natalism is growing so much. Doing this is as selfish as self deletion / unaliving. You don't eliminate the pain, you just transfer it to who you brought in here, or in the second case - who you left behind. If you want kids, adopt them - there are tons of orphans that would be happy to have parents and a family. No wonder pet shelters are bursting at the seams, while breeders are making $$$ Western late stage capitalism collapse will be glorious to watch.

[@quin5974]

The problem is the way society is set up, capitalism. It’s hard to have hope when you’re told your main goal in life is to be rich, successful, and high status, but your chances are very small. I’m not entirely against capitalism and certainly not for communism but I think we need to disrupt the way we are currently living in. I’m not sure how though.

[@jonathanfonti]

I agree that capitalism has many flaws. But we have to remember that capitalism, just like socialism, or any other ism, was not created by aliens or other-worldly creatures. It was build slowly by us, humans. And we humans and all of our values have been sculpted by evolution through the process of natural selection. As long as we keep ignoring this truth, we will never take control of our lives.

[@ceciliasanchez9500]

Through education

[@quin5974]

@@ceciliasanchez9500 what would we educate people on?

[@black_tech_owner]

A quick study of history shows that this isn’t true. People have been unhappy since the beginning of time and it has been well documented. Desire is the root of unhappiness. Eastern philosophy seems to be the closest to having this right.

[@jonathandutra4831]

That sounds like a personal problem, You need to disrupt the way your living then. You can't speak for others. Furthermore to be successful is subjective.

[@judiheitz5895]

is there a difference between happiness and contentment?

[@nuralanur1662]

Amazing video about happiness but one crucial aspect you overlooked is the belief in God - trusting that He will protect, guide, and manage our affairs, especially when situations seem beyond our control. Having faith that God will support us through any kind of difficulties. This perspective can alleviate feelings of depression and thoughts of suicide.

[@widiudb3313]

I'm glad I subscribed this channel. 😄

[@The-Well]

Welcome aboard!

[@ivaroaddogsitting6610]

surprisingly good advice

[@palomahenriquez6677]

Really good advice!

[@sreejithMU]

The very idea of happiness really makes you unhappy.

[@vijiind]

To me happiness is kind of balance between money, health, relationships and success

[@UrViridescentLeaf]

As a mostly happy person, I can confirm that the first 4 processes mentioned in the 'Rewirement' section came naturally in me, I never needed to compulsively do them 😊. But exercise 😢.... I need to exercise lol. I am fat but it kind of doesnt matter to me coz i am happy 😅

[@jonr6680]

Fat dumb and happy is the American dream, right?

[@arielsong1289]

aww you are so lovely🤗

[@StarHarvestOfficial]

As a skinny man who's in shape and miserable, I'd swap with you any day. Love your body and enjoy your life!

[@hectorgallegos826]

Not worrying about what you don't have but rather rejoicing with what you do have and building from there.

[@The-Well]

For what it's worth, productive exercise can be a lot less intense than you might think. We recently did some videos on our parent channel (Big Think) recently with Harvard's Daniel Lieberman recently regarding misconceptions about it. kzbin.info/www/bejne/pGekqKaMfK93hbs

[@sarahfranco6802]

Perfectly interesting video. I love this theme and I was thinking so much about this lately

[@AlekseiMalov-le6rb]

I feel that but before talking about wrong patterns and ways of thinking we need to make sure everyone has their basic needs satisfied. I bet everyone would love to savor that latte if they had enough money to buy it without recalculating budget for the week and did'n have to answer those emails to get work done so they won't be fired as ineffective

[@clueless139]

if someone is introvert, has social anxiety or can't take move to communicate other people what they'll do?

[@user-qn6lw1et9r]

I think happiness is a feeling that the body and soul can feel. It's a beautiful and special feeling. I think everyone can feel it. And for many reasons, it is difficult for us to find, but happiness is always inside us. Happiness is when you feel at peace. Patience, gratitude, love, sharing and happiness become clearly. Come and see the world. There may be many miracles that you did not know existed all around us. And when you open your mind to learn, feel, and understand, you will see how beautiful and wonderful this world is. Happiness is not in a distant place; it is inherently present here in this world and in us. I know some people may still find this life difficult and challenging, but we have been given the opportunity to live, learn, experience, and fulfill our souls. So, let's walk towards the light and do good deeds.

[@The-Well]

"Happiness is not in a distant place; it is inherently present here in this world and in us." Wow! Such beautiful insight-thank you for sharing!

[@yeahyeah410]

Fasinating, thanks

[@pedrova8058]

"connect in real life, especially in real time" well, there is a huge social component there that is practically impossible to modify solely from the individual position. If we spend all day working to pay the bills and finance the basics, time priorities are hard to change. Has that improved in the last two decades? I'm afraid it's only gotten worse; productivity indicators have been rising, but salaries haven't. So, we are poorer than before, then we must work more to get the same basic things (the economic and psychological statistics are clear)... I'm afraid that the ideas of psychologists like Erich Fromm were just words to the wind...

[@jonp9149]

More money gets rid of financial stress so helps you on the way to being happy