9 AUTISM In Girls Symptoms (YOU Need To Notice)

Here are 9 must see autism in girls symptoms to help you identify autism in girls.
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Autism in girls symptoms can differ from how it’s presented in males, a lot of the current information available for diagnostic and identification of autism in people is based around melds.
Here are nine of the most common ways that you can identify autism in girls symptoms by just looking at these signs and characteristics.
1 Selective Mutism
Selective mutism is where the person who will opt out of talking at certain social situations because they are overloading for them.
2 Masking
This is where a person on the autism spectrum who is female will try to act neuro typical around other people in social situations and hide their autistic characteristics.
3 End Of Day Meltdowns
When an autistic female is masking all day at the end of the day once they come home they may feel so overwhelmed that everything that they have been hiding all day will come out in a meltdown.
4 Obsessive Collection
Autism in girls will often that she would self as being a collective type of obsession of a genre they are really into it and they will collect everything.
5 Issues With Friendships
Girls on the autism spectrum may find it difficult to maintain friendships because they are finding it hard to relate to people who are neuro typical.
6 Exhaustion & Fatigue
When the girl with autism is masking all day this can be very exhausting and can cause exhaustion and fatigue and extreme tiredness at the end of the day or on the weekend if they have been masking all week.
7 Difficulty With Eye Contact
People with autism will definitely have issues with I contact and maintaining eye contact during conversations.
8 Extreme Shyness (quite)
Autistic females are known to be quiet and quite shy and reserved when they are in social situations or with the family members
9 Fussy Eating
Picky eating or fussy eating is definitely a common characteristic with females on the autism spectrum and people on the autism spectrum in general.
HASH TAGS:
#autismingirls #actuallyautistic #autism
LINKS:
Kati Morton - Autism in Females: How is it Different? | Kati Morton: • Autism in Females: How...
UCLACART - Understanding the Social Behaviors of Girls with ASD: • Understanding the Soci...
Signs of autism in children - NHS - www.nhs.uk/conditions/autism/...
Autism in girls: Symptoms and diagnosis - Medical News Today - www.medicalnewstoday.com/arti...

[@moreloveforthepeople]

Selective mutism absolutely doesn’t mean not having anything to say- often we have the words we want to say running a loop in our brains- it means we are unable to speak.

[@dark_baphomet]

Yeah the selective isn’t really the best word lol, my boyfriend and my ex and some other people incl. my mum think I’m being rude but I physically can’t make words come out, little squeaks maybe, if you’re lucky, but that’s about it. I drink water and try and calm down and then I can usually say things very slowly with several breaths between words, but it’s taken me years to get to the point of being able to do that

[@tesreso5448]

Thank you! Fucking screaming things in my head but cant just SAY it... Thank god for IMs and text chat XD

[@skippergin2695]

Yep. My throat tightens and sometimes I can't even get a sound out. It doesn't mean I'm shy either, I'm not, it means I'm overwhelmed.

[@Queenrthebest]

I have all the things to say but it doesn't work, it sucks a belter -_-

[@misstalulah9063]

Yeah it’s not actually selective at all. There is no choice in there! It tends to then cause me anxiety because I feel embarrassed at being so silent. Like a weird shut off zombie - it feels very odd.

[@alexa7337]

I don’t have an end of day meltdown. I have an end of day shutdown.

[@ShelleyPolarbelle]

Same here

[@mstmarieprov]

Same.

[@crystaledwards9878]

its one or the other. Usually shut down for weeks and weeks and weeks, spending my evenings doing deep focus things that I want to do, it might be just sitting quietly or meditatively developing a photograph, or maybe digging in my garden, not for any particular reason, its the "meditation" of it...but then when one little thing tips the scale, Its total melt down. This week it was my husband who is getting chemo and has brain fog, couldn't figure out how to use the microwave (with the little dial, one function microwave, not fancy, like a kitchen timer). It was one thing that I had to do that I just couldn't and it all came tumbling down. It is good that he is as much Asperger's as me. So he needs the same things I do. Chemo has changed the dynamic and we are both having a difficult time keeping our emotional shut downs/melt downs in check.

[@leolion3323]

Same here. I don’t get what can be seen as similar to tantrums. I just shut down, go mute and “blank” as I’ve been calling it get trapped in my own head. That stuff happens for a while until I have been holding in my emotions so much that I just break down at the slightest inconvenience. I cry, shut down, become unresponsive, get trapped in my head shake, stim etc. Sometimes it feels like my thoughts are “in the eye of the hurricane” while other times I get pulled into the storm. The thing is though that I can’t tell if this is just a regular anxiety attack (I haven’t been diagnosed but have a sneaking suspicion I might probably have anxiety) or a thing relating to autism. Or both. :,]

[@leolion3323]

Same here. I don’t get what can be seen as similar to tantrums. I just shut down, go mute and “blank” as I’ve been calling it get trapped in my own head. That stuff happens for a while until I have been holding in my emotions so much that I just break down at the slightest inconvenience. I cry, shut down, become unresponsive, get trapped in my head shake, stim etc. Sometimes it feels like my thoughts are “in the eye of the hurricane” while other times I get pulled into the storm. The thing is though that I can’t tell if this is just a regular anxiety attack (I haven’t been diagnosed but have a sneaking suspicion I might probably have anxiety) or a thing relating to autism. Or both. :,]

[@rinpaisys]

I was like “I don’t have any collec-....oh wait.” Pan over to literally any direction and see cat themed items or items for my cat. Just...everywhere.

[@TheAspieWorld]

😂😂😂👌🏼👌🏼 Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).

[@alinabouch2071]

That was me, except it was "oh wait, I pick up every single rusty screw I find, and get upset when anyone suggests getting rid of them"

[@laurent2744]

Hahaha same 😂

[@Nakia11798]

I don't have any collections, but I used to. I just can't bring about the interest in anything to even get one item related to it anymore.

[@alyssachapman7060]

I did the same thing! “I don’t have any collect…..*opens cupboard with every food, spice, ingredient in jars and jars ONLY.” 😂

[@Panda-panda189]

Selective mutism was a huge thing when I was younger. Especially, if I was around boisterous and outgoing people. I just lost any glimmer of vocabulary. It was frustrating as people assumed that I was just nieve.

[@TheAspieWorld]

Yes! Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).

[@ew4645]

I have question: does anyone here ever have a moment where they don't have an intense interest and feel really lost with themselves because of it?

[@skippergin2695]

Sort of, but I did it to myself. I don't pursue my interests much (I have a couple long term ones) because they both sooth me and make me feel terrible. I used to get so angry with myself for not doing what I was supposed to do and instead pursuing my interests so I stopped being able to get engrossed in them and it's horrible.

[@crystaledwards9878]

@@skippergin2695 I'm struggling with that right now as my husband has cancer and I have to balance what I want to do and what I need to do with out getting engrossed in my pursuits and forgetting that he needs care and keeping. Last week we were on a walk and I got distracted by some grafitti, and dashed off trail to go to check it out with out remembering he is unsteady and then he fell and got hurt. and it was my fault.

[@skippergin2695]

@@crystaledwards9878 That must be very unpleasant for you both.

[@misstalulah9063]

Yes! I sort of go into a holding state until the next one develops. I have adhd as well. Sometimes my focus goes back to a previous interest - but I have no say over what it will be or how long the focus will be there. I just have to go with it. It makes it very difficult to have a career in anything. Once it goes, it is gone. And that in between stage is just horrible - bleak and empty and soulless feeling.

[@witchone6831]

Yes.

[@lavendermeadow1381]

I was just wondering, does anybody else here keep their special interest a secret?? I get very obsessive but I kind of obsess over things in private, if that makes any sense. 😅

[@alexa7337]

Me!!!!

[@foreverdreamwithinadream6871]

Depends on who. Like if there is a subculture or club that share similar interests or if I know somebody well and the topic comes up, then no; but otherwise yes.

[@eloise2232]

I’ve learnt that certain types of special interests (music, tv etc) I need to keep to myself because I’ve had friendships ruined because people were really rude about my interest and it hurt my feelings too much

[@grace0336]

I feel extremely embarrassed talking to it about people but at the same time I really want them to know about it 🤣

[@ieahleen678]

it depends, I had stuff I wouldn't talk to almost anyone about, and then other about which if you ask how's my life is going, you get to hear about (like, recently that I started cultivating chili peppers)

[@J3w3lz4nn]

Apparently, I should win the lifetime achievement award in masking. I'm 47 and just realized 4 years ago that I'm autistic. I had no idea. I masked so well for over 40 years, I didn't even know it myself. When I did discover it, it was so shocking. I told my family and they didn't believe me because they never saw the signs. My son was diagnosed with autism 4 years ago so I was researching it to better help and understand him. That's how I discovered it in myself. I'm a 100% introvert. I've asked people what I was like growing up and the only thing anyone ever says it that I was quiet.

[@rebeccamay6420]

48 here, and discovered myself less than a year ago because KZbin suggested a video that might interest me. "Because Autism" is how to explain why my whole life happened the way it did, and finally learning/ knowing this has been such a relief!

[@gigahorse1475]

I discovered this about myself at 22, and when I told my parents they didn’t believe me at first. But after my mom did some research to better understand me, she now thinks she has it too. It’s funny how learning about your child can help you learn more about yourself! It’s a common experience.

[@Historian212]

You should get yourself tested. There are multiple reasons why you could identify with many possible ASD traits. And if you have an official diagnosis, you can get help and accommodations in various situations that would be very helpful to you.

[@jupiterthree5228]

I've seen women being diagnosed even later than that. It's insane, and really depressing.

[@melanielafrance6779]

​@@jupiterthree5228why you find that depressing?

[@3possumsinatrenchcoat386]

at age 3 my doctor thought i had autism due to my extreme shyness and muteness around loud people or in new situations, but the child psychiatrist my parents took me to definitively said that i wasn't autistic because my mutism was selective, and that autistic kids can't just turn their behaviors on and off. every point in your video resonated with me, especially the first one. this is the first time i've heard the term "selective mutism." after wondering for 19 years why i felt so different from other kids but "knowing" it wasn't autism, i think you may have opened my eyes to the answer. idk if you'll ever see this but thank you so much

[@sidclauwers5945]

Yeah being diagnosed has become more reliable then in the past, but many people can be baffled how much they don't realise unless it blows up in their face. I still don't know how much value a diagnose holds as a care more about how people chose to treat me/accept me rather then the other things that come with it, but if there is any doubt or you think it would help out it isn't worth getting a second opinion, people can tell you a lot of things about who you are but that doesn't mean they're always right. I hope you don't experience to many difficulties and have a good life. (Sorry for being random I sometimes have this.).

[@astphi868]

@@pristinejoel8802gtfoh scammer

[@ahseymania]

i relate to ur situation so much. this makes me so happy

[@shewho333]

I knew my daughter was autistic by the time she was four. When she was five, her teachers would tell me how quiet and polite she was at school, and she’d come home and just have the biggest ever meltdowns after school. I felt so bad for her, because I knew she felt just like I do after a whole day of being around people.

[@TheAspieWorld]

Yeah it’s interesting how as a parent you just know. Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).

[@mamak5670]

How did you get her assessed if school thought she was 'fine'?

[@mxngos7493]

thats me except i am not diagnosed- im sooooo confused bc im aligning with autism

[@shewho333]

@@mamak5670 I had her in occupational therapy due to her premature birth. In the states, it’s best not to rely on the school for assessment. I always tell people to get the doctors on board first. Our doctor set up our therapy, and our therapists helped set her up for a clinical assessment. Then, when you ask for an assessment from the school in writing, it’s illegal for them to ignore it, so the child gets a school assessment too just to see if they need special education help, or just an education plan with some personalized accommodations. Never trust the schools first.

[@Ponakalaranjit456]

With My Family members I am also Quiet.

[@martinwilke1980]

in a nutshell: 1. selective mutism 2. masking 3. end of day meltdown 4. obsessive collecting 5. issues with friends 6. exhaustion and fatigue 7. difficulty with eye contact 8. extreme shyness 9. fussy eating

[@sixfeetundertheradar6080]

Calling me out I see..

[@lieselemay]

My life!! 😫

[@tabithabex]

Thanks. Listening to this video is exhausting.

[@itskashkashi]

I prefacetalkimg abkut anything im passionate about with "don't judge me".

[@jlbeeen]

I'm going to save this and share it with my therapist. I'm wanting to know if my traits really are ADHD as I was diagnosed, or if it's autism combined with my chronic illness as the one who diagnosed me suggested. I had all of these since I was a kid. It was always blamed on being an only child (lack of social skills because I didn't have anyone to socialize with) or because my parents separated when I was little. but I would be very shy and refuse to talk to anyone at church, or at kids programs unless they came up to me and shared interests. I have collections of coins, stamps, rocks, shells, and as a teen/adult, amiibo figures (Nintendo game accessory). I don't know if I had meltdowns as a kid, but school was hard and I'd often have hours of homework due to learning disabilities, so I masked pretty much all the time, which was terrible for my mental health.

[@Moonrisedaze]

I’m a female in my 50’s, and my entire life, I’ve had unusual social anxiety issues due to what I finally see, in retrospect, could be attributed to autism. I can only describe it as feeling like I’m on the outside looking in while in groups. It feels like watching a party through a window from the outside. I left every sleepover in tears, because maintaining the act that long was impossible. Plus, I just needed to be in my own bed to decompress & sleep. I thought I was just mental, because no one else seemed to be struggling like me. Fun occasions that everyone else got (and still get) excited over, terrified me. I don’t even want to begin explaining how much social lubricants (alcohol) played in lifting some that weight, but ended up opening it’s own can of worms carrying twice the weight! With regard to masking; it’s literally so ingrained that at this point, it’s almost involuntary. For a long time, I thought it was some sort of multiple personalities situation. I could see and feel myself becoming a different person (depending on who I was speaking to) in various social situations & groups. I quietly KNEW that I was acting different, but nobody else seemed to notice, so I went along, living my life & adjusting accordingly on a daily basis. Ex-hausting! We have a long family history of autism, but it just seemed to only occur with the males. It never occurred to me until all of this information became available about females with autism, that so SOOO much of my behaviors & thought processes from my earliest memories could be explained! It’s been liberating! I just wanted to thank you and all of the others out there providing this content. I now understand that it wasn’t just me. It feels like I’ve been gifted a reprieve. I can finally exhale. ❤

[@jackiejones8599]

I am crying right now because I finally feel like there’s a reason I am having all these problems. It’s not just extreme social anxiety, it’s always been selective mutism, masking, emotionally exhausted, not understanding why I couldn’t just “be myself”. My dad is emotionally abusive so I got really good at reading people because I had to, and I’m only really great at reading my family members. My dad is a narcissist so naturally sometimes I tend to think I know more than I do. I can’t afford to ask for a potential diagnosis, but this is a start.

[@crystalkirlia4553]

Tbh, I started crying after no. 3. I've never been diagnosed but every time I see something about autism I'm like "yep, yep, yep, that's me... but I don't want to say it and piss people off because I'm not diagnosed" and then I heard about the end of day meltdown and just started crying because people used to bully me for never going out and just going straight home. It was like I was a robot that just deactivated every night...

[@kiddkenaii]

I’m autistic and in my opinion it is perfectly fine to self diagnose (only after intense research) if you’re sure you have it and you’re unable to get clinically diagnosed. Paige Layle did a video on self diagnosing and explained it perfectly. I also recommend Princess Aspien’s YT videos, I love her! They’re both on the spectrum. I originally self-diagnosed after taking quite a few “autism personality tests” online (all pointing towards the fact that I most likely had autism, but keep in mind it’s not an official diagnosis), and watching a BUNCH of videos like this one. Got my assessment and now I’m OFFICIALLY diagnosed. Sorry for the long reply just wanted you to know you shouldn’t feel bad about it, you’re not alone! Lots of people self-diagnosed before getting a clinical diagnosis and that’s perfectly fine as long as you’re sure. :)

[@Puzzlingitout]

If it fits then stay with us. If you can get officially diagnosed that’s great. If you can’t then take what works from here. Another unofficial alternative is to see a therapist (they can’t diagnose but can sometimes help with getting a better picture of it and helping with some of the issues we may have such as dealing with sensory issues, stress and such).

[@marymess454]

I too have never been diagnosed and now after 47 years of trying to figure out ‘my weirdness’, it ends up I’m not alone in my struggles. What helped me figure it out was that my son is autistic.

[@rachelthompson7487]

Same thing happened to me but from a different video I watched before this one.

[@FoxTheFurry]

Exactly I have 8/9 symptoms but no one cares about me cuz I'm not diagnosed like I'm pretty sure I get / have selective mutism as well which is so annoying

[@eloise2232]

My teachers couldn’t understand why I didn’t do my homework. It was because I’m so tired from masking all day that when I get home I have no energy, I can’t even talk.

[@moragmckay3779]

I'd shut down alone in my room for several hours, maybe listening to music or drawing, maybe just lying with my eyes shut because of daily tendency to migraines (which eventually led me to leave school at 16, giving up my lifetime dream of becoming a vet). I'd then be doing homework until after midnight, so, having to get up early to look after my Mum and my pets before the bus from our tiny village to school, I'd be permanently exhausted.

[@Rhianalanthula]

My daughters are both a bit like this, especially in primary school. We encourage them to work on recharging their batteries enough to be able to work. For my eldest daughter, we could either work on the homework set or her spellings and times tables, but not both. Secondary school wasn't too bad, as long as the teachers put the homework on the homework app, as they didn't always write it down. The school has changed its policy now and give out key points for Home Learning every half term which are to be studied / read through (different pieces each week). The do regular tests / knowledge checks to help them with long term recall. This is less stressful.

[@vanvandersyde4705]

I would go home and watch youtube or sleep

[@nikkib8811]

I didn't realise how profound the effect of masking can have on a person. I do hope schools become more aware of this issue and start to allow their students time to rest and relax and get their energy levels back up.

[@melissafradette479]

😥

[@bezelleblanc2580]

I have autism, bipolar, and generalized anxiety disorder. I'm also female and I can admit these are pretty spot on.

[@necronyx7176]

I knew I was autistic but had not heard of the end of day meltdown; I just thought that I was weaker than others. Thank you for making me feel better about this exhausting, emotional break.

[@TheAspieWorld]

Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).

[@ZukiTanuki]

I am a selective mute. I get panicky about "my turn to talk" and freeze, listening to the white noise that the conversation becomes. I feel like its kind of linked to the masking thing, cause you overload while trying to keep the mask up. Most social situations will burn me out, often for days after. I have "collector-itis" - I am obsessed with collecting things which have collections... and so I avoid collectables out of fear of never having a full collection. I cannot maintain friendships at all. If someone stops talking to me I will not chase it up and try to make reparations, I just accept it cause its too stressful. I'm permanently tired. Eye contact feels about the same as having exposed genitals… it feels awkward.

[@inthesoulsofeveryone]

Absolutely love and relate to your eye contact being like genitalia exposure comment. Nailed it.

[@boogalingous1]

I hyperfocus on one thing at a time and obsess over it. I collect DBZ and inuyasha everything. I was also forced to make eye contact when I was a kid, so now I focus so much at the eyes that I don't actually hear what the person is saying to me.

[@charissakucera3635]

Yes, I have the 'trained eye contact' problem just as you describe.

[@mstmarieprov]

@@charissakucera3635 Exactly. They're talking but I'm too busy analyzing their eyeballs to hear a word they're saying.

[@EijaBerg5362]

Eyes tell the truth eyes are mirror to the soul.

[@LoriFahy]

im 51 and i STILL dont make eye contact.. people say im shady because i cant do the eye contact thing.. i also dont hug .. lol

[@moragmckay3779]

My Mum was very big on the whole, look someone straight in the eye, shake hands and say "How do you do?" when you meet, routine. This only increased my social anxiety as even without her presence I self-judged and thought I was being rude if I couldn't behave like other people. To this day, I stare at people's mouths or chins instead as they talk, so much so that I struggle to make out words if I don't, despite not "needing" to lip-read, and hang back out of handshake reach. Social distancing is a breeze for me! The best intentions of parents to "help" children fit a norm can be really counter-productive.

[@Crysticks]

This is 100% me....every single point. I wasn't diagnosed until I was 32, I am 47 now and I finally came out to my friends and my family about it. Ive always kept it private because of the judgment and bullying I experienced. I so wish I had help when I was a kid. But back in the 70s and 80s, girls just didn't have autism unless they were 100% non-verbal. Thank you so much for bring all these points up. 🙏 ❤ 🙌

[@annemedcalf]

speaking of "coming out" is funny, but yes it is like that isn't it. We fear it because of what people will say. Do you know my own family tells me directly that my daughter isn't Autistic. To them having autism is some horrid thing to be ashamed of, somebody waving their arms about them, spiraling out of control on the floor, screaming nonstop. If the tables were turned I would learn all aspects of it so I was informed and could help or at least understand, not flat out tell my sister she is wrong. No two autistic people are the same, just as no two people without autism are the same. Ugh, it's no wonder we stop sharing. People just don't want to know.

[@Sally_Joe]

My son is on the spectrum. While going through the process of getting him diagnosed, I recognized how much I fell in line with the symptoms. I took an AQ test as an adult and scored 43. I declined a formal diagnosis for ODD, ADHD and autism for myself. I've kept it mostly private. I have an obsession with books. I've so far collected approximately one thousands books. Counting was a problem for me and I've worked hard to stop counting everything.

[@Mojohjohjoh]

As a kid I was always described as shy, quiet and introverted but as I grew older I started feeling like I wasn't and I'm actually extroverted, but just don't waste my energy when it's not worth it

[@k8lynmae]

This is natural and anyone can experience

[@raizeld3294]

When I was a kid, my teacher's thought there was something "wrong" with me because I didn't talk. My parents didn't really believe them, because I would never stop talking at home. I didn't end up getting diagnosed until fairly recently (early 30s). That daily cycle of masking during the day, meltdowns at night, and pure exhaustion all the time is why I'm really not looking forward to going back to work in person after the pandemic. I think I might just send this video to some friends of mine, since it really captures my experience.

[@LawNerdAmber]

I agree whole heatedly. I'm actually going to ask my psych nurse for a work from home reasonable accommodation even after I get my vaccine

[@AnneAndersonFoxiepaws]

I was never diagnosed but its so obvious you would think it would have been. I am actually dreading everything opening up again as I preferred the isolation. It sounds bad but I am sure other people on the spectrum understand.

[@kittypride6343]

in the 5th grade i was known as the girl who dosnt talk .

[@ladybaabaa3294]

@@AnneAndersonFoxiepaws I DEFINITELY understand! And it's not awful. Everyone's different. I personally can't be "seen" by people for longer than a certain timeframe or I become emotionally exhausted. I know everyone isn't watching me, but just the fact they are ABLE to see me results in me getting SO tense as I have to mask, but quickly become too tired to keep it up, and/or there are certain things that overpower my masking ability, such as talking on the phone in front of people. I just completely shut down. Ugh.

[@aprilbourne967]

I have many meltdowns myself

[@cbearintheforest6776]

Dan, you're videos are so helpful. I've been told that I might be autistic, so many things have ticked off the boxes. Social anxiety. Eye contact. Masking. Collectkng. Selective mutism. Extreme shyness Introvert but outgoing. Do not like groups. Over stimulation. Fussy eater. Routine. Interruption with routine will throw every. Thing. Off. I'm sure I'm missing a few things. But thank u. Your videos are helping me tick off LOT of boxes. I'm in the midst of finding someone to officially diagnose me. One of your videos was extremely helpful for meltdown and I realized why after having a rough day, why I lean into my favorite activires or hobbies. I'm an adult and I collect Barbies. And I've also noticed other Barbie collectors have similaur traits to myself. The more I learn the more I want to dive into the collectors mind. I have a certain how I like to keep and organize my collection and it stresses me out when I cannot keep the similiar things together. So I'll re organize using another feature or split it based on another likeness. Like, dolls wit unusual hair color. If they no longer fit in the box and I have a few loose ones, the color hair will go with either their similiar ethnic or skin tone, etc. Thank you Dan. For having many calm, fun, and affirmative videos. I look forward to watching more and learning more. Cheers!

[@feleciawalberg646]

Great info! Most of these describe my daughter perfectly, and make me really happy that she was adopted into our geeky, quirky, loving family where she can be valued and accepted instead of shamed or forced to pretend to be someone she isn't. Reading some of these comments hurts my heart, especially the ones about having to hide your interest and enthusiasm in different things so as not to be bullied or labeled as weird. Everyone deserved the right to be their true self!

[@crystaledwards9878]

I found out I had aspergers when my daughter was going thru testing. The dr asked me how I dealt with my aspergers in my daily life and I was just stunned. She thought I already knew. I can totally relate to the end of day melt down.

[@crystaledwards9878]

And I have every color of glitter. Not to use, ever. Just to have.

[@TheAspieWorld]

Oh wow!! That’s super interesting and very common for parents to have the condition to! Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).

[@t.ht.h9607]

1. Selective mutism 2. Masking 3. Meltdown 4. Obsessive collecting 5. Issues with Friends 6. Exhaustion and fatique 7. Difficulty with eye contact 8. Extreme shyness 9. Forsee eating, not actually fossy eating

[@Halberd45]

@Mike who cheese harry I have all the symptoms no autism dx but yes social anxiety. I'm really think I have autism my meltdowns are frequent and God awful. but nobody wants to dx a 40 yr old woman w autism I guess only little boys.

[@marymess454]

@@Halberd45 feel your pain. People ask why do you want to be tested now? Is it for benefits ? I have to explain when you feel out of place your whole life, it would be a relief to know it’s because of something and not yourself being insane.

[@chenaeM7]

fatique ✨

[@debrabradish3027]

I’m 71 & have always been a bit “different”. Conversations can be difficult, not much for chit-chat. I come up w/quirky nuggets of trivia that gets me a weird look or 2 from friends , family & clients. I’ve also “faded” out, as I call it, during group conversations, tending to almost eavesdrop on other conversations. I keep to myself, but am social. I plan activities for others, but consider myself socially awkward so tend not to engage. I’m much better @ putting my thoughts on paper than spontaneous conversations. Somehow it seems safer & I don’t have to be engaged in a potentially volatile situation. A new pastor & his wife thought I was angry w/them until he approached me after church one Sunday. Now I’m learning to use them for my go go folks in spiritual concerns & daily growth. Anyway, this video just opened up a topic for me to look into. I knew there was something unique going on upstairs, but who knew it actually has a name. Thanks & keep up the videos! PS: I’ve collected cats, fabric & yarn for projects. Still have cats, am giving & throwing away the other things due to no time for them now & I’m on to other projects😂

[@donagaleta]

I'm 53 years old and just now autodiagnosing myself. Daughter, sister and mother to 3 Asperger men. Thank you you for all your videos about autism in women! I've got almost every symptom, but today I just wanna tell you that I feel so fatigued after work... some weekends I just want to sleep all day, and then I feel very guilty 😔. I have an apointment with a psychiatrist for the first time in April. I hope I'll get a diagnose.

[@diplomasaurus4232]

Masking,just for a few hours can leave you exhausted, overwhelmed and needing a few days decompression

[@gwanagirl]

My daughter is diagnosed she doesn’t have meltdown at the end of the day she doesn’t explode she implodes and retreats to her room and doesn’t come back out

[@Lillyluvsanime]

Yeah, that's me. I shutdown instead of melting down most times. It takes A LOT to get me to melt down, either all going on at once, or a build up over time.

[@gwanagirl]

@@Lillyluvsanime My daughter is called Lily she’s been an unusual teen to what I’m used to,very quiet no acting out nothing unlike her older sister who was like a totally different person when she became a teen.I find the difference is so unique to each person with with autism,like the saying if you know an autistic person then you literally only know one as each is so unique in their own way

[@Lillyluvsanime]

@@gwanagirl exactly, though your Lily sounds a lot like me. I was never a trouble maker, the most trouble I would get into in middle/high school would be reading recreational books in class or not getting assignments in, but because I've had 504 accommodations since 3rd grade (due to my ADHD diagnosis, currently I'm self diagnosed autistic... official diagnosis is hard to get to... quite a process) I would be given 2nd, 3rd, 4th and 5th chances on assignments and be able to progress to the next grade. But, apart from early elementary school when sharing and getting along was more of a challenge (in addition to being neurodivergent, I grew up mostly as an only child, with a half brother that has lived in a different state most of our lives, so we're almost more like part-time siblings/childhood friends) I never got in trouble for behavioral things. I would much rather be at home watching my cartoons, or drawing or some other special interest instead of going out after school or even on weekends with masses of students I didn't even know. In school I had a small group of friends and various acquaintances because in school you're almost forced to make friends, since you're around these people all the time and it's easy to find at least one thing in common (especially with clubs) but other than one or two people, if I didn't have to see them because we were at school, I just didn't. Also, I hated school dances, I only went to one for each like... level, one elementary school dance, one middle school dance and one high school dance (freshman year homecoming) I super did NOT want to go to prom, and instead had a couple friends and a few of their friends come to my house on prom night and we all played cards against humanity, watched anime and stayed up to 6am. I maintain that I had much more fun at my non-prom than I would have had at real prom.

[@gwanagirl]

@@Lillyluvsanime my Lily likes anime,is fascinated by drawing eyes over and over,super fussy eater,always hands her work in late,prefers being home but unlike yourself she’s one of 7 but has her own personal space one area to sleep one area to get away when she’s overwhelmed which has a door so she feels safe it’s a custom high bed her dad made her so she can retreat,she hates lights they make her eyes water so bad including sunlight,she hates parties,gatherings,is a selective mute she won’t talk to anyone she doesn’t trust or love,has acquaintance’s in school cos she has to this lockdown stuff has been like heaven for her literally as she hasn’t had to mask her way through her school day you both sound very similar

[@Lillyluvsanime]

@@gwanagirl oh my gosh, she really sounds so much like me in high school. Yeah, of all the people in my family and my few friends I'm still in touch with, I think COVID has impacted my day-to-day the least because I didn't go out much to begin with other than to my college campus (which I like, there are plenty of open areas where I can have plenty of space to myself) and to my two favorite stores (Target and Five Below). I avoid sunlight a lot too, partly because of my eyes, but mostly because I sunburn so bad😅. I'm that person who will go for a walk wearing a hoodie and full length jeans in the Texas summer. I think for a long time my eyes were more sensitive than I wanted to believe/let on, because I hated wearing sunglasses when I was little, they'd dig into the side of my head, press into my nose, and they'd fall off a lot (I have a small-ish head for my age, I have to wer kids/yout size masks to go out during the pandemic because the adult size ones get in my eyes and I hate it. That's part of why I prefer to keep my hair short too, easier to manage, less junk in my eyes (and I think it looks better on me). Sadly, because I wasn't diagnosed as a kid, and my mom sees my, "quirks," as just... me (which they are, but... y'know, there's a reason I feel like I'm putting on a play when I'm working at a grocery store. There's a reason I was a teenager before I understood that my step-dad was being sarcastic and jokey with me, not just being mean) she still says she doesn't think I'm on the spectrum, but has been... I guess as supportive as she can of my pursuit of diagnosis.

[@birdword111]

I'm an autistic woman diagnosed nearly 4 years ago when I was 21, When I think of these signs, I realize just what my actions meant and find it annoying that I was demonized for doing most (if not all) of this, as if people were super determined to interpret my actions in the worst light possible.

[@TheKjoy85]

Like calling us spoiled and saying that we are just throwing temper tantrums instead of having a meltdown.

[@annemedcalf]

@@TheKjoy85 omg, my mum and sister say that about my child. She is now 15 and after 10 years of being told this, and her being diagnosed, they still don't get it, some people just see it as a cross to bear and can't be bothered understanding it, if only they would walk a mile in the shoes of someone living with autism.

[@TheKjoy85]

@@annemedcalf Despite me not having a diagnosis growing up, my mom and a vast majority of our family and friends seemed to understand that I wasn't throwing tantrums or trying to be manipulative, I was shutting down because I just couldn't cope. I have always shutdown more than I have meltdown. I will forever be grateful for those in my family and our close family friends who seemed to instinctively meet my needs even when we didn't have diagnoses or terminology to express them.

[@annemedcalf]

@@TheKjoy85 Hi Kelly, yes exactly, we knew something was wrong, we persisted and thankfully years later, (11 to be exact) we proved all the naysayers wrong, now our daughter feels heard, feels understood. Her meltdowns began at about 4, and continued. We couldn't help her, we could only support her and hold her, which isn't always the best result, but today she know is high functioning while still remaining happy in her world. Thank you for your sharing and the open connection. We don't need to prove ourselves to others, something we just need to believe in ourselves. That can be enough :o) Good luck to you.

[@annemedcalf]

oops I should have used the word shut down, I think 4 years of not talking in school was a good indicator or her shutting down outside of our house.

[@kimmcfarland3210]

Hi, my daughter was diagnosed with Autism and ADD at the age of 6. I started noticing a lot of things that she does in myself. Like having certain specific interests, good at remembering string of numbers,repeating phrases etc...

[@dsummerssummers15]

I din’t have autism (to my knowledge) but when I went to community college, I could talk my mentor’s ear off for an hour straight and wouldn’t shut up but as soon as we got into our group meeting with like 10 or 15 other people, I wouldn’t say anything. The presenter specifically asked me if I had anything to say, I looked at my mentor and she nodded her head as if to say go ahead, but the word no didn’t even come out of my mouth. I just shook my head no 🙃🙃🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️

[@archiecook55]

I'm in university and I feel like I can relate to that too, like I enjoy talking to my favorite professor in one-on-one meetings but when I'm in class with other students I am usually the quiet one who doesn't talk.

[@dsummerssummers15]

@@archiecook55 right. I can talk all of my friends ear off but as soon as I get into a group or around people I don’t know I’m pretty much mute. Idk if that’s a sign or if it’s just social anxiety or what

[@followyourdreams8469]

I did that i hated group projects but I am autistic and was laughed at a lot x Think lots of people like that just being shy maybe :)

[@followyourdreams8469]

I love talking as well xD

[@moragmckay3779]

Strangely, I've always been the exact opposite.Even when I physically couldn't say hello to schoolfriends in the morning and was considered painfully shy, I could stand in front of the class in debates or go on stage giving poetry recitals or singing. The sense of freedom I felt being able to express myself in these less personal settings was addictively exhilarating. I couldn't perform if I saw my Mum in the room, though, until I was in my 30s, when I had missed it so much I steeled myself to get over that by not looking her way, so I could begin taking part in fund-raising cabarets.It was always much easier with strangers though.

[@sharonyearsley6720]

I've gone from not speaking to the other extreme. It enters my head straight out my mouth no thought of where or who I say it to. I'm often told I'm rude.

[@UNITEDJACKSONSFANS]

Same here

[@ladybaabaa3294]

I'm a bit like this too. I used to feel like I simply had nothing to say and felt SO awkward, so just didn't say much. Now though, I seem less self conscious and there are many thoughts in my brain that I want to say! It's quite interesting. This change coincided with me commencing taking a benzodiazepine each night. For me, less anxiety = releasing my restricted mind maybe?

[@sharonyearsley6720]

@@ladybaabaa3294 I wonder if quetiapine is what changed me???

[@ladybaabaa3294]

@@sharonyearsley6720 That's interesting! Quetiapine might make you more sleepy and less tense and thus less quiet!

[@sharonyearsley6720]

Omg. I've just been increased to 100mg. But I get days when I'm plain brutally honest no mincing my words and other days when I feel hyper and I am worse. Yet if I have to have a confrontation I can't do it face to face. I have to use messenger.

[@mandyneuhaus2544]

Hey Dan, since you asked why we are here. I don't have Autism or know someone in my group but since I still deal with anxiety and other problems I became quite sensitive to the topic and I think it's very important to educate yourself to help people around you. I'm actually a quite extrovert person but I still struggle with certain social situations or this "finding my place in society". Most of the time I feel quite good but I know how good people can get with masking and that is why I really like to watch your videos or from other youtubers in that topic so I can react better in a situation or towards a person that is on the spectrum. A huge thank you to you! :)

[@MissDanaSophia]

Greetings! I'm in my 30s, recently self diagnosed, female non-binary, and mad that it took a pandemic to realize I was coping with my entire life with masking. Just starting the journey, and very grateful for your work

[@helkatww3992]

You have just described me and my daughter perfectly...I was diagnosed when I was 45, my daughter when she was seven, and none of our family members believed us (except my husband, who is extraordinarily patient). They believed that autistic people all sat in corners rocking backwards and forwards! I had to laugh when you got to the bit about collecting! I collect anything and everything, and now I've got nowhere to put anything anymore! At thirteen I forced myself to maintain eye contact, because of something a teacher said, and now I have to make myself break eye contact every so often, to make myself appear more natural - so I even have to mask my masking!!! Like another commenter on here, I end up focussing on making eye contact so much that I don't hear what the person is saying.

[@JK-me1du]

Lolz masking your masking! I'm just a few years younger than you and I'm trying to get my daughter diagnosed. But silently I'm diagnosing myself. The hardest masking for me was trying to laugh or pretend I got jokes when I totally didn't or found soemthjng funny but just couldn't laugh.

[@Jamie_Behm0310]

Yes!! This is what I did too. One of the things I always did was look above people's heads and not have eye contact. I had struggled finding work (and still do) and I read that eye contact was important so, I tried to force myself to have eye contact and then, struggled with knowing when to look away and when to look back. The process was so stressful that I would lose concentration on what we were discussing. I hated it! I'm now 43 yrs. old and though, not as bad now, I still struggle with this.

[@rebeccamay6420]

I think I do fairly well with eye contact... Except that I am constantly thinking about whether I'm doing it right: Should I look more at the left eye or the right or kind of switching between both, but not too frequently? Don't forget to glance away so the other person doesn't get weirded out by a constant stare, but don't look away for too long, lest I appear disinterested or allow my mind to engage with a distraction that makes me lose where I was in the conversation. Maybe if I appear to be thinking about the topic at hand, it will look more natural when I look away from time to time. Does my facial expression suit the topic or reflect how the other person wants me to feel about what they're saying?

[@annasen8804]

Absolutely! I’m thinking so much about whether the eye contact is appropriate etc that I can’t actually focus on what’s being said. This is very unhelpful especially if someone is trying to instruct me in something, as I can’t take it in if I have to make eye contact as well. I’m 55 and hoping to get a diagnosis next week ….. 😬

[@dahnemolony7577]

I've always found looking directly at people way too intense, so since I was a kid, I've just watched people's mouths instead. It takes the pressure off, and people still think I'm looking directly at them. Obviously, I'm really good at lip-reading!

[@logandevereux5076]

I just got diagnosed a few months ago and this video makes SOoooo much sense now!! I find it funny that you mentioned twilight because that was my obsession for five years and that’s all I would talk about. I do movie reviews now on my channel so I don’t drive my family insane with my constant mention of cinema and other books I read.

[@amandaroot7968]

End of day meltdown leads me into my start of day meltdown remembering what I have to go through again. When I find something I like, I obsess till I spend all my money. I watch old 50's shows over and over because I know how it will end and I can lessen my anxiety. Thank you for this video. I've been diagnosed with multiple mental health issues and just started another med, this has opened my eyes. But being a social worker, I look at everyone else besides myself, this allowed me to look inward. Thank you. You do amazing things.

[@_.alex.-]

This channel is a goldmine Dan. Thank you. This video in particular has been very eye opening as a parent in the very early stages of assessment for our eldest. An excellent resource!

[@jules_sophia19]

I got diagnosed a couple of months ago, at the age of 17. I was seeing a therapist before, but no one even considered that I could be autistic, because of my excessive masking. I was the one who had to bring it up and in the beginning, no one believed me. If I hadn't kept pushing I wouldn't have been diagnosed. But suddenly everything made sense and the research I did me understand myself better and I didn't hate myself as much anymore. Your channel was one of the first one's I stumbled upon and you've helped me so much with videos like this one. I can relate to all the symptoms you mentioned. I was always considered shy and just getting through the day left no energy in me and often led to a meltdown. But now, I don't feel alone anymore and having an explanation for everything I'm going through is so relieving, I can't even describe it. Thank you so much for what you are doing with this channel, you help a lot of people with your videos. (I apologise for my English, it's not my native language)

[@alexrose20]

I'm also 17 and have been wanting to get diagnosed. If you live in the US, could you please tell me what the process was like and how you managed to get diagnosed?

[@sophiekerr8964]

Your English is absolutely flawless! Kudos to you for learning a whole new language!

[@eloise2232]

Are we the same person? Your experience is the same as mine and I was diagnosed a few months ago at 17

[@jules_sophia19]

@@alexrose20 I'm sorry, I don't live in the US and my diagnostic process was quite unusual anyway, I think...

[@jules_sophia19]

@@sophiekerr8964 Aww, thank you so much... I actually prefer English over my native language, to be honest...

[@IntoTheSunset369]

Girls on the spectrum will change the world 💪🏻🌈 I just pulled my daughter who is level 1 high functioning out of ABA because it was inducing anxiety 😟

[@chibi-bombyx]

You are the parent little girls like me always wanted. Bless.

[@NiaLaLa_V]

@Jjjj Llll Circus animals don't enjoy that either. In fact, no animal wants to be used the way we use them. I find it odd you ranted that long about respect while ignoring that you threw animals under the bus you were driving.

[@birdword111]

You did the right thing.

[@rinpaisys]

ABA is a mixed bag, to be sure. Unfortunately it is utterly plagued with bad actors, and the few good places frequently get overtaken and/or bought out by the bad ones. There *ARE* ABA places that are good and beneficial, but they seem to get rarer and rarer as they get bought out by people who don’t care and are outright cruel, and drive out those who do.

[@nickytreagus8548]

I do not have anyone in my friends or family that are female and on the spectrum but I like to learn about topics like this. It's great to understand as much as possible so I can react well to strangers that may be struggling with these signs. Thanks for a great video.

[@shannonrappa2375]

I'm here to learn more for my amazing 8 year-old daughter. Thank you for all that you do for this community.

[@chibi-bombyx]

I have always had a very easy time relating to people and making friends, but keeping them is VERY hard because it seems very challenging for most neurotypicals to relate to or empathize with me. I can mask super well for a super long time since socializing and understanding why people do things is a special interest, but unfortunately I burn out super fast and need to spend a huge amount of time alone in my head recharging. Also that thumbnail is rad, I thought it was just me but one wiff of a banana even if I can’t see it gets me really close to vomiting takes a lot of energy to mask my face in encountering a rouge surprise banana eater...

[@chibi-bombyx]

@Jjjj Llll yep! For sure! Also when i was little, especially practicing aligning my emotions (in the mirror) excepted on my face for neurotypicals with what is fitting for how im feeling.

[@hollydunne526]

I was diagnosed at the ripe old age of 59 I have brought up 2 lovely sons they both have high functioning Autism , life is full of surprises ah ! I miss having family support it would of made life a little bit easier , kind wishes to all ! 😊

[@misstalulah9063]

I’m similar - I make friends easily but I lose them again so easily - intense masking - totally exhausting - and it is always a matter of time before the masking slips - and that is usually when I lose them and off they go. I used to have this feeling of - it’s just a matter of time before it all goes wrong, but i didn’t understand why! Waiting for the axe to fall... Such a relief to be diagnosed and to actually understand what has been happening all these years! The friends I can stay unmasked with are soooooo valuable. And in a lot of cases, I am coming to realise, they are autistic themselves!

[@KatieWellenbergMusic]

Same here!

[@natalie-mariedavies779]

I am 19 and I have had a late diagnosis of ASD at almost 18. I went through alot of traumatic experiences when I was young and this made it even harder for people to see that I am autistic because they thought that what happened to me made me abit weird. I also have dyslexia and everyone thinks that I have OCD. This chanal has helped me SOO much as I had no one to talk to about my struggles, THANK YOUUUUU!!!!!! (BTW I am a huge harry potter fan. And music has been a huge comfort for me too) 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿 😁

[@ThePhantomQueen87]

I was considered a problem kid and wasn't diagnosed til 32

[@tarafearn8984]

Thanks loads for this. You have just explained everything in my daughter, that makes it easier for me to understand her. AND how I have lived for 47 years, without being diagnosed. YOU ARE A STAR. Now I get it. I also have Autism. Shared, liked, & subscribed xx

[@patriciacarmichael426]

Hey thanks for bringing this to the forefront. I am 61 and knew that I was different from the beginning. I just checked all of your list and feel so amazing that I am not alone!! ❤️🙏🌹🥰

[@moajuh3378]

I really appreciate that you make videos for symptoms in girls! Your videos has really helped me to understand my diagnose after i got it a month ago.

[@Chelsey-Cello]

I had an obsession with Breyer horses. I collected them, among other horse figurines and I had a massive collection of rocks lol. It was not uncommon for me to come home from school with a bunch of cool looking rocks in my pocket.

[@woomeebly]

Yep. I was obsessed with horses at a young age. And speaking different languages.

[@amandaquedens1145]

Me too. And didn't even really care about horses in general. But whoever carved the molds for bryers was soo accurate anatomically . I appreciated attention to detail.

[@marymess454]

Hey! Rocks are cool and I collect them too. These days they line the edge of flower beds

[@zarpy43]

While i am male, Selective mutism, and masking resonate strongly with me. I was investigated for aspergers (Not sure what term i should use, i hate diagnosed its not an illness, it doesn't to be cured) as an adult a couple of years ago when i was 27, i have started masking less as an adult. But throughout my life social events have always left me exhausted when i got home. I remember when i got interviewed for my current job i was told i would need to have a professional smile or mask when interacting with users. And i felt relief saying i can do that, knowing i always do that with almost everyone around me. I keep some of my thoughts and hobbies private and to myself like if i share it people ruin it. Its kind of like i can make eye contact with people it feels massively gross and uncomfortable usually but i have learned how to. I spend so much of my energy thinking about what people say and do and how i should react to it. It almost feels like i try to manipulate people into liking me as someone i am not

[@isbammoi3358]

🫂🫂🫂 I'm right there with you. All my relationships feel manipulated, even though I care about these people. It feels like I have to manipulate or have no relationships at all.

[@sonya4272]

I have nearly all of these. I'm 52 and was diagnosed with autistic traits but not autism a year ago. Apparently because I can have banter with my friends and can make eye contact, infact i have to force myself to look away because i stare too much aren't signs of being autistic. They put a lot my issues down to me having social anxiety and depression from a very young age

[@TheAspieWorld]

Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).

[@emmaberry6178]

I was diagnosed on the spectrum back in October 2020 as a 23 year old. I had just recently had my first child months prior. At the moment I’m trying to navigate having my first child, receiving and navigating my autism diagnosis, all in the midst of a global pandemic. Anytime I look up anything about being a parent and anything about autism it’s always about parents of children with autism. I can never find any info about actually being on the spectrum and having children! I’m so glad that I found your channel.

[@marypatten7051]

Wow that's a time and a half! I bet you'll be an awsome mum and have a lot more empathy for your child than most parents! Hope everything works out!

[@Honey059]

OMG! I have all these traits. I have an autistic brother that doesn't speak. And since I'm able to, my parents never had me diagnosed. But now, from watching videos about it and remembering things that happened during my adolescence. My teachers used to get so upset that I always preferred to be on my own instead playing with the other kids at recess or in P.E. They didn't like it that I could entertain myself and be on my own. It's now so obvious to me why I am the way I am. I haven't been and still am not able to make friends or fit in. I always felt apart from my classmates and I could never relate very well. The shyness and having meltdowns also very well resonates with me. At least now I know why. Which is a relief cause I always thought there was something wrong with me.

[@hakunamatata0177]

I completely relate to every. single. symptom. you mentioned! I'm not diagnosed, but highly suspect I've been masking my way through life... I'm 44, when I was young, autism was never talked about and rarely heard of. The movie Rain Man was the only time I ever heard about it. Now I can look back and recognize soooo many ways I masked my inner struggles, and still do.

[@MB-xz7ct]

I feel so understood here. Thank you for the video and for those who commented. Kindness and compassion can change someone’s existence.

[@foreverdreamwithinadream6871]

Thanks for bring up awareness. Too many girls go undiagnosed is because people don't known that autism with girls can be different then with boys so they don't look into things more. With girls, they often just assume that not talking is just being shy or a quiet person and brush it off. I never been diagnosed; but I can relate to that. If I don't know the people for feel comfortable, I won't really talk. I feel awkward (I am just bad at communicating and connecting with people). I tried telling my family and just brushed off as well saying that not everyone likes to talk. It's a bit frustrating. I used to collect My Little Pony and dinosaurs when I was a kid and now my collection is mostly anime and music related-figures, clothing, songs, books related to certain music, etc.....also books and all that for Dia de los Muertos/Day of the Dead and I wanted learn more about the culture on my dad's side of the family. Also been a picky eater. Some foods just smells and looks so disgusting to me that I don't even want to try them. I don't really eat a lot of foods. I thought fans just collected things I never gave it much thought neither had nobody else really.

[@lesley1831]

Aspie girl over here! Amazing video Dan, everything it's beyond relatable and so the Harry Potter part (I'm a Ravenclaw)! I have selective mutism and shyness, having them whithin a new place, a unexpected visitor, an expected but uncomfortable visitor, classes, groups and that's far I can think of.

[@Val.Kyrie.]

I was a slytherin for a long time but into my 30s became very ravenclaw 😅

[@MissKpopJunkie]

I just got diagnosed and had to stop seeing my psychologist at the same time. Trying to figure everything out on my own (While trying to find a new doctor)... I'm so happy I found your channel!

[@ty-si4nz]

thank you so much for making this video, i’m currently in the middle of being diagnosed with autism quite late i think? i’m 15 so i don’t know if that’s late or not but videos like this really makes me feel less alone because i haven’t really told anyone yet what’s going on (the friendship thing definitely applies here) and that there’s not something just wrong with me and that a lot of people struggle with the same things i do, so thank you for making this video it’s really comforting

[@sydneymcdonough8078]

I didn't know anything about autism until I started suspecting my daughter of having asperger's and the more research I did the more I realized Im pretty sure I have it too. I'm 28 (I'm "obsessed" with Ryan Upchurch lol I do know exactly what you're talking about. Harry potter. Lord of the rings. The hobbit. Twilight. Supernatural. I've been through so many series obsessions at this point lol) and my daughter Hadley (obsessed with Jojo Siwa lol) is turning 5 years old next week on February 10th!!! This is me and my daughter 100%.

[@Sammstar420]

Upchurch is hilarious, and supernatural is my favorite show of all time lol. No spoilers I haven’t finished it yet! I’m putting it off lmao. I’m only up to the end of 13 :) I really don’t want to finish it lmao cuz I’ve been watching it for like almost ten years and I’m going to be so sad!!!

[@samt1206]

You have no idea how much you've opened my eyes! I started watching you during my diagnoses process last year and I just received my diagnoses of ASD and ADD at 20. You helped me realize and understand why I do some of the things I do and I just want to say thank you! Keep doing what you're doing 😁

[@jayverene1986]

Thank you for creating this video dude, my Wife told me to watch this, we are both high functioning Autistic with ADHD. Think this will really help, and yeah she is a super lady, like just so deep, and funny, shy at times and so cool, basically my best friend, but also my soulmate xxx

[@hannahmartincomposer]

I relate to so many of these symptoms but I never realised they could be considered autistic! I feel like I've finally got answers to so many things and why I've felt so different my whole life!

[@VeroLandzaat]

..... I “ survived “ my teenage years copying Bellatrix Lestrange...Can you imagine what I was like 🤦🏻 Later in life I apologized to a couple of people , felt so sorry.

[@Nakia11798]

I had a habit of just mimicking whatever friend I was with and no one thought of me as the same person as someone else. Only thing they could agree on was that I didn't know when to shut up.

[@L0rdOfThePies]

@@Nakia11798 yeah I tend to mimic the person I'm around, I mimic the way they speak after a while, if I was just myself well I'd probably be bullied and discarded more, known as the twitchy girl or something

[@LangkeeLongkee]

I would alternate different characters when I felt like it. Usually a Winx club character or How To Train Your Dragon (still my biggest and longest running special interest), some superhero or whatever lol

[@whiskersmom5850]

I always felt like I had to pick a person to copy when I was young. To know how to act in social situations.

[@teelesynclair5902]

I feel like a brick just hit: it's insane how much of this I relate to, I've never been diagnosed as autistic but I do have an ADHD diagnosis. I used to have meltdowns when I was 5 but they put it down to my grandad dying and he was close to me. I also become almost mute in certain situations, I don't know if it's because I've experienced bullying but I'm scared in social settings. I had terrible problems with eye contact, I had this particularly cruel teacher who literally used to grasp my chin tightly between her fingers on one hand and physically raise my head so I would look at her, I still looked away. I also obsessively collect makeup palettes, and nice hats. I have developed substance abuse disorders too at age 22, I'm 29 now and was raised in Glasgow, Scotland ❤

[@annawehrle5625]

I relate to this so much. I have an ADHD diagnosis but not an autism diagnosis too. I would have meltdowns before school as well as after. I dreaded going in the mornings. People would tell me that I was just aloof and overly shy. I was obsessed with building fairy houses and furniture. I can't help but wonder how many autism traits were just later discounted as being part of my ADHD, such as my collections being 'hoarding tendencies'.

[@teelesynclair5902]

@@annawehrle5625 they blamed my behaviour on stressful life events, my grandad died, my parents split up and my grandmother had a nervous breakdown because of delayed shock at the death of my grandad. My behaviour just got worse. I had meltdowns before school because I anticipated bullying from a teacher and students. I had a hair trigger temper, I physically ran around more than other girls and I played rough. I would develop strong interest in certain subjects and I'd read about them, draw the subject matter and isolate myself away with my newfound fascination. I think all this has muddied the water surrounding my autism status

[@spannycat2]

I have both ADHD and Aspergers Syndrome. Ya I can relate to end of day meltdowns.

[@aemidaniels]

i find some of these fit ADHD as well. i collect obsessively, clam up at the weirdest times, kind of role play a functioning human when I'm in public, I'm tired all. the. time.....

[@marymess454]

It’s nice to hear these videos, after 47 years, I don’t feel so insane. It’s a relief to know I’m autistic and I think I know this mainly because my son is too.

[@karlamarie7535]

"Why can't you learn things in school like you learn Eminem lyrics?" I dunno!?!?!?! I didn't have a say in this?!?!?

[@TheAspieWorld]

Oh man if only it was that easy uh!? Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).

[@mstmarieprov]

If everything were taught with music lyrics, I'd be good to go!

[@misstalulah9063]

Yes, same here. I have no choice in where my focus can stick and where it absolutely cannot.

[@Sky-Child]

When you can remember all the postcodes/car registration numbers you have ever had but not how to put your socks on. Yeah. Is me

[@misstalulah9063]

I’m hopeless at lyrics as my auditory processing is terrible! I always end up with very weird versions of the songs i get to know! 😂😂😂

[@Kiddly3000]

we like to please the people around us as well a lot of us do i also collect troll dolls the old ones are my favorite ones

[@lugaruna]

Wait... The people pleasing is an autism thing... I haven't watched the video yet but i noticed your coment and now im curiousXD. I haven't been diagnosed with autism yet but i have a very strong feeling i do after the things i have read. I am recently diagnosed with adhd.

[@Kiddly3000]

@@lugaruna what i mean by wanting to please someone is if someone tell me to do it i will do it or try to copy to the best i can because if I did not i felt like i fail at it all

[@lugaruna]

Ooow so if someone ask's you to randomly award some prizes to kids after a scavanger hunt right there on the spot you will do your best to give them the feeling they did an awesome job even tough it freaks you out and are teriffied of making a mistake/a fool of yourself? Damn that was a long sentense... This was also a thing that happend durring an internship of mine. I was just doing my job (taking care of animals in a small zoo) and a woman with a kids party just got up to me and asked if i could do it... not part of my job discription but i can't say no and i hate to dissapoint people. So if somebodey would ask me to award some prizes on stage and be a charming hostes on the spot i would do it without fail even tough i am shitting my pant's on the inside.

[@christinapalafox]

For me the people pleasing is like an offshoot of masking- playing a certain character for a certain person because I honestly don't know what else to do, socially. I think that this led to my being taken advantage of in certain ways because I didn't know how (or that I was even supposed to have) set boundaries.

[@ninilovenana]

I’m a people pleaser too but I think it’s because I’ll do anything if they do me the favor of not talking at all. Hhhaha

[@Slothisticated0252]

im 25 years old and i have been struggling with social interaction and fitting in since i was born, have been depressed since i was 14 but therapist cant seem to find out what is the matter with me. a lot of things you said in this video make me think more and more im also on the autism spectrum, combined with ADD and Paranoia. Its a struggle and im so tired of fighting but your video gave me a spark of hope. Thank you for this, its helping me find peace of mind and ensures me im not the one thats doing something "wrong".

[@OneofaSkeind]

I love your analogy about coming home and being so exhausted it's like carrying a heavy load and finally being able to put it all down. 👏🏻 👏🏻 👏🏻 🙌🏻 🙌🏻 🙌🏻

[@gillianpreston1248]

Check off for every single sign on your list in my case. I was diagnosed at 17, but it was suspected for years. When I finally learned that I really was autistic, it was such a relief. And watching your videos, following accounts on Instagram (@theautisticlife, @aspiememes, yours, others that I can't remember 😅) helped me to feel less alone. Really enjoyed this video, keep the great content 👍

[@sharonyearsley6720]

I tend to eat the same few meals on rotation. Weeks of this the months of that. I can't stand the thought of salads with seeds. Textures all wrong yet I can do seeds in oats.

[@mstmarieprov]

Same with the few meals on rotation, except that I've had oatmeal for breakfast going on 11 years now. Never thought it meant anything until my diagnosis!!

[@TheCelticTrio]

I am the same way with texture of some foods especially oatmeal. I did try and eat it but i wouldn’t be able to do it again.

[@wes4744]

Omg I don’t like meatballs in spaghetti but will eat it if the meat is grounded up. I’m also really obsessed with salad, like I can (and want to) eat it everyday, that and pickles.

[@constancedenchy9801]

I rat the same things over and over. It is really hard if I got to a restaurant and they are out of what I like. I will just leave. Also I can't deal with hot food. People will say "eat it while it's hot"...I hate hot food; I like my food room temperature. Makes me the last one eating. People get annoyed with this ...and I eat slowly.

[@constancedenchy9801]

Omg auto write changed eat to rat ...🙄😳

[@AshleighMargaret]

Wow...the "end of day meltdown" is something I've never heard put into words before. This always happens to me and I never really knew why, I just knew that it was something I've always experienced since I was young. Thank you for making this video!

[@MAXXY_BOI]

As an autistic girl, I'm so happy that you are talking about this. I go through all of that, especially with masking. I do that everytime I go to school.

[@8656737s]

I'm diagnosed with ADHD. I'm getting tested again in April. I wonder what else is going on in my brain? I was such a shy child. I Never made eye contact and had a hard time making friends. My sisters always told me I was weird. Thank you for this!

[@lurji]

i relate so hard man, im 15 and officially have adhd but ive been doing so much introspection thats led me to believe im autistic

[@heatherl.leonard5184]

Having issues with friendships, eye contact, and being called weird are all also common for those of us with ADHD.

[@kellymolenaar530]

“Masking” to me is a thought process, the constant simulation of situations before they unfold to try prepare myself mentally & emotionally for the upcoming interaction, this pops up in my head like an annoying notification in the form of short videos (I could come up with 10-200 or so variations of an interaction), these “notifications” come with a feeling of guilt & anxiety, & occurs in the hours, days, even weeks or months leading up to the event. I’m exhausted before the interaction even begins. This leads to mutism.

[@dncjific9234]

Thank you so so much for making this video I shared it on my Instagram and with my close family and friends this explains a lot perfectly what I struggle with when I can’t explain it myself - 💙

[@FireQueenTarot]

I feel like I was guided to this to help me understand my child, and myself a little better. Thank you so much! Blessed be 💙

[@charissakucera3635]

I'm listening for myself, age 60 and finally understanding why my childhood was so difficult. Also for my 2 daughters, now adults, who have many autism traits that females do...I remember as a 12 year old, I felt overwhelmed at times by sensory or mental input, and I would have emotional breakdowns that confused my mom and sisters. I felt I had no filter on my brain, which was painful at times. I seem to have high sensitivity and compassion to the extreme, but I'm not good at social interaction, so I use elective mutism, with facial expressions I have learned to show interest and understanding. Eye contact is still very difficult for me, and if I need to make eye contact deliberately in a social situation, it feels unnatural and I focus so much on 'doing eye contact appropriately, I can't understand the speakers meaning, the words don't make sense. I'm starting to understand myself now, in a new light of ASD understanding, and my girls, my only children, i can see how ASD makes sense for both, watching them grow up and navigate as adults. One daughter was averse to being held, mostly quiet and busy with complex projects. She is now finishing medical school and still very focused on her hobbies of falconry, and dog training for agility courses. The younger girl was alway distracted, unfocused, and did a lot of repetitive motion. She had attention and behavior problems at school and was diagnosed with ADHD. She also went on annoying jags of interests, and still is a very literal thinker. She now wants to go to mortuary school, but her decisions are often impulsive, like when she joined the Marines. She is very emotional, not logical like her sister. But I see the signs in both of them, and see how they are coping with the world, pretty well in fact. So I am on this deep dive into understanding what makes us tick, how we think, and ASD videos have been a big help in this inquiry. I don't plan on getting diagnosed, because it's a hassle,, but all the information i need is this video and others like it. The feeling I get is a kind of peace with myself and my life, and a huge relief. Thanks for reading all this. I don't usually talk much, so I'm just getting it all out. 💕 Carissa

[@chelseaalexus1839]

This made me feel at peace reading everything you and your girls went through and still adjusting to now. I’m still trying to piece together the possibilities of ASD for my family and I as well. Your second child reminds me of myself too. I feel emotions intensely which is why I’m often so caring with people and animals (specifically dogs). My older brother shows signs and he’s pretty socially awkward and likes to stick to himself most of the time (IMMENSELY introverted) and my older half sister has a son which was diagnosed with autism at the age of 2 (has been learning to deal with it to this very day). My dad had a lot of problems with my mom (they’re divorced he traumatized her lol) and he showed a lot of signs of ADHD from not completing/finishing certain tasks, to not being able to get up and do things. It’s possible he has both ASD and ADHD hence why my half sister (who we share the same dad with) has a son on the spectrum, or why my older brother shows ASD signs extensively. My older half sister is diagnosed with ADHD and for me I started to realize that I showed and still show signs of ADHD as well (Unfortunately I’m already an adult, age 21. Missed numerous opportunities and years to get a proper diagnosis and support for it as a child). Not officially diagnosed yet, but I’m on ADHD medication and they help TREMENDOUSLY. I still think I may be on the autistic spectrum as well though. It’s possible my sister and I have both ASD with severe ADHD which might be why it was harder for us to get diagnosed since we have more than one diagnosis. That plus studies on women with ASD and ADHD being low; causing most of us women to go misdiagnosed or undiagnosed. Other than that my brother, sister, nephew, and I definitely got our traits from my dad’s side of the family. I’m an adult now. I’ve struggled with so much and don’t have access for support either. It hurts sometimes knowing how strong my ADHD symptoms are and possible ASD traits not being able to be seen for an official diagnosis to help me prosper in life a bit better but I’m trying to cope. Thank you for sharing your story. It means a lot hearing about other people’s experiences similar to mine and I’m glad you finally have some closure despite many years of bewilderment ♥️… Wishing you and your daughters the best!!

[@almaresonante6796]

I didn't actually realized I had that much of an obssesion like my mom does about a lot of things. I actually used to collect a lot of Twilight and Harry Potter stuff, I still collect movies, books, pandas, music accesories/instruments, photography articles and photographs. As a kid I loved toys of all my favorite cartoons, etc.

[@susanlisson7066]

It starts at the 2 minute mark if anyone’s short on time.

[@TheAspieWorld]

Thank you!!

[@kittylynx8911]

👍i suffer from masking just diagnosed thank God cuz now I can get the help I've needed my whole life thanks for all ur videos they help so much

[@katherinemcgauchie9104]

Mum here! My son was recently diagnosed with ASD and we have an ADHD assessment coming up soon. 3yo daughter is showing some signs for both so I'm learning more to find out if it's enough for an assessment. Also going for an ADHD assessment for myself 😬 found your channel yesterday and I'm so thankful for the information.

[@candise9063]

Here for myself. Thanks for putting these out, I definitely feel less isolated knowing I share traits with other people ✌️❤️

[@mstmarieprov]

Right here with you! There are so many of us. 🥰

[@neshatimmins2737]

This is great. Thank you for making these videos. My oldest son and my youngest daughter was diagnosed with autism not to long ago. This helps so much❤️

[@31michelle64]

Interesting video. My daughter was a late diagnosis, although the warnings were there. She's now 22, and trying hard to negotiate life as young adults. One of the Interesting things my daughter did is she developed "stimming" activity in her teen age years. And she had speech issues as a toddler, but once she began speaking they, speech therapists, ignored her. Nice video

[@amandadaniels7489]

Next time someone I get close to asks me what aspergers is, I’m showing them this video. It pretty much nails down everything about me and my childhood.

[@yanahakai]

Uh oh! I haven't been diagnosed with Autism but I've certainly noticed that I have many traits & have struggled a lot as a result. I had a professor that was possibly an aspie & I thoroughly enjoyed keeping up with the fine details & relevant trail-offs about anthropology & even wanted more details, while a majority of the class was overwhelmed & considered his excess detail to be distracting. This was an indicator for me that I may be on the spectrum. Plus when I talk about topics I specialize in I habitually give details like an all in one reference book. For the eye contact, I've taken to reading body language & hand gestures while people talk to make up for not holding contact. Also, I'm Navajo & in our culture it's best to look at the chest while someone is talking like we're looking into their heart, so I occasionally do this too.

[@NatalieJade9000]

I’m a teen girl who has not been diagnosed but all of these things apply to me. Especially the obsessiveness, I have been obsessed with anything TMNT related for the past seven years. I have all sorts of collectibles and ramble on about it non stop. I also am selectively mute.

[@lillieeloit1231]

eyecontact is such a problem for me, especially in tense situations. i had a lot of embarassing meltdowns in front of teachers, professors and bosses because they where looking at me too intensely

[@FRALLE2]

Just a little note on the 'Selective' mutism and End of day meltdown/shutdown: Sometimes in really bad periods, there's times where I find myself unable to speak when I get home, but I'm also lucky enough to live together with someone I'm super comfortable with, and I usually know that reaching out to him can help a lot, but in those bad periods even trying to type down words over text can be too overwhealming, so I've learnt that sending emojis and GIFs can be a great help, as that's something I can actually do at those times. I've also heard of families where they'll have different pictures printed out (like a red dot to mean 'something's bad right now' ect.'), to help communication when words can be too much :)

[@TheAspieWorld]

Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).

[@essysworld398]

As an aspie girl, I especially had a hard time with masking and end of day meltdowns. I had nearly nightly end of day meltdowns at the end of middle school, then, when I entered highschool, it became too much and I began having at school meltdowns daily to weekly. That’s when I decided there was something going on and found out I was autistic. I thankfully don’t mask much anymore though and have slowly learned some confidence and social skills (mostly confidence acting like it’s an understanding of social stuff). As for collections, I will randomly decide to collect anything I like the aesthetic of. I have a small box full of coins and bottle caps I’ve found around the house or on outings, have the biggest collection of stuffies grown from since I was little, a shelf full of glass bottles, a cup full of dried flowers, a shelf full of calico critters, and I’m now obsessed with na na na dolls.

[@maxvolume7652]

This video makes so much sense to me! I’m non-binary (afab) but the masking, inability to maintain eye contact, fussy eating, fatigue, end of day meltdown, and especially collecting obsessively make so much sense! I buy a lot of pins, but never but then on anything. I have them collected in a box. It’s hundreds of dollars of pins and I don’t use them. Same with pens and pencils. Hundreds that I don’t use! I didn’t know that was a sign! If you ask me anything about Percy Jackson, BTS, or My Hero Academia, I’ll rattle off and recite anything I’ve ever heard about them, (especially BTS because that’s my current special interest) and I tend to info-dump on people I’m nearly 17 and I know for a fact I have autism, but if I were to tell my family, they’d laugh and not get me serious help or an analysis. And that’s really painful, because all I want is answers and a diagnosis, but I can’t get that.

[@TheAspieWorld]

Yes!! Thank you so much for the comment! Please subscribe to my channel to see more videos from me :).

[@Darvit_Nu]

My 2 children & I are on the spectrum. ♥️ It was actually your videos and all the information you share about autism that helped us get the first diagnosis! We appreciate you so much 😊

[@TheAspieWorld]

Aw I appreciate you!

[@lex4473]

The harry potter thing is too relatable 😂

[@diarts4458]

Absolutely! So much so I’m changing my house into Hogwarts! 😂

[@eowynmoonlight]

Ravenclaw person here! :)

[@lex4473]

@@diarts4458 Awesome!! :D

[@lex4473]

@@eowynmoonlight Cool! Me too! :))

[@hollyinhell]

My daughter has diagnosed Asperger's so I am only watching this vid because it showed up in my recommendations. However, I watch a lot of your other content so I can gain a better understanding of my kids diagnosis and learn how be the type of mother she needs, based on her individual attributes and challenges, so I can give her the best chance to become confident, capable and independent woman we all want to see our daughters become. And to be honest, raising an autistic daughter has never come easy for me. I struggle every day with knowing if I am doing the right thing or failing completely as a mother.. She doesn't allow her dad and I much affection, prefers to be alone in her room and she rarely shares, with her dad and me, anything more than her personal interests. I find it hard to have a close relationship with her because she is so guarded. I work around the parameters of where she feels most comfortable, which makes me feel like maybe because I don't force more involvement that I am in fact an uninvolved parent and screwing her up emotionally for the rest of her life. I feel like I have no idea what I am doing, so I must be doing it wrong and because of it, my kid will grow up and be miserable and have a low self esteem.

[@jbmaitre5758]

I love the way you brush your non-existing hair behind your ear!!

[@rebeccalents7910]

This explained my daughter so well. she is 6. Thank you for sharing it.