Willow - It's A Total Disaster

[@givmi_more_w9251]

Not all the participants were bad. The horses were cute and fulfilled their roles as mounts flawlessly.

[@Adrian-qr6gk]

horsies are always good aren't they.

[@sneeringimperialist6667]

You don't know how much cgi was involved in making them cuter...

[@scottmantooth8785]

*there method acting was subtly very brilliant and worthy of many bags of oats*

[@jgostylo]

Holy crap, the chase scene with the horses had me and my kids rolling on the floor laughing. All of the close ups were about as unnatural looking as I have ever seen.

[@leonkent1365]

They're not the only ones who weren't acting.

[@Innominate3000]

Scientists warn that within 5 years time disney will run out of childhood classics to ruin

[@legatedrengr]

That seems like a rather conservative estimate to me...

[@tintinismybelgian]

Which childhood classic will be the last one to fall?

[@plamenyonkov9154]

One word for you, remakes.

[@steffanyschwartz7801]

@@tintinismybelgianironically it’ll be Walt’s first creation. Mickey himself

[@Kossage]

@@plamenyonkov9154 I would love to see a live action show of Chronicles of Prydain if Disney still has rights to it. The Black Cauldron was flawed but still an enjoyable romp that showed promise even though it had to cut out and alter stuff and condense the story a lot, so having a multi-season series to explore the books in depth would be welcome. It pains me that Disney and fans often forget Princess Eilonwy in the Disney Princesses list. Just imagine seeing Arawn Death-Lord on screen in his full glory. :)

[@Arassar]

"I don't know what Marvel sees in this girl" I do. She's got the perfect multi-culti look. Actual talent doesn't matter to these weirdos.

[@polarvortex6601]

yup

[@regroot3]

You nailed it

[@blaisebaileyfinnegan8202]

@@PocketDelicious She's visibly not White.

[@Beau74]

That's exactly it. That's the only reason.

[@nigeltheoutlaw]

The epitome of la creatura.

[@davidkanizsai9914]

The TV series has 8 episode with a total playtime of roughly 400 minutes. This 12 minutes long review video has 1.6 million views so far. So Drinker actually saved 400 * 1.6 million - 12 * 1.6 million = 620.8 million minutes for humanity. I call this serving the good cause!

[@4G63Tx]

Lmao hell yeah!! I knew this show was going to be absolute shit, and I was right again. I loved the original movie as a kid. I hate modern Disney.

[@nomadperson4619]

You probably failed maths if you assume that everyone haven't watched the series before watching this review. You also assume many people won't watch series after watching this. C'mon many people watch just to kill the time.

[@tableswithoutchairs1168]

@@nomadperson4619 GUYS GUYS I found the one fan of the show

[@piorcholnmurgatsh9488]

@@tableswithoutchairs1168 you should get an achievement for that

[@mikoto7693]

@@nomadperson4619You’ve got a point, even if we half the numbers to account for people who have or will watch the show, that’s still a high number and a service to humanity nonetheless.

[@XeniaChow]

Rings of power, wheel of time, witcher and now willow. The people that tried to gaslight us and said this is a "golden age for fantasy" are such despicable people.

[@jamesestelle7260]

Don't forget Star Wars and Marvel

[@death-king1834]

The only real exception was possibly Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance which despite only lasting for one season consistenting of just ten episodes was some of the best televison I've seen within this modern decade. You can really tell unlike near everything else from the Witcher, Rings of Woke, Willow or Wheel of Time the people who made that show clearly loved and respected the original movie and generally sought to add to it rather then tear it down for the sake of THE MESSAGE.

[@firefoxriouyh6541]

@@death-king1834 which I'm so glad that netflix is not making another season. They would've messed it up. I'm sick of sequels now.

[@AnonymousJ0E404]

Witcher Season 2. Season 1 was was good. But now I’m worried.

[@vincentbeton]

No one ever denied it would be "golden" as in "Shower"

[@rileysmith3406]

Your "Go away now!" was delivered with more emotion than any line from any character on this Willow series.

[@harbl99]

Yon Drinker seems to have the Big Mad about this one.

[@rogersmith7396]

@@harbl99 The film pulled him out of a drunken stupor.

[@anxioussamurai9017]

It's kind of amazing that The Drinker's critiques of Disney's shows are always more entertaining and insightful than the shows themselves.

[@mothichorror446]

That's what happens when you get someone who actually knows how to write.

[@fyrchmyrddin1937]

In total fairness, Warwick Davis wasn't very good in the original Willow either. I know that "vertically challenged" & "actor" probably makes for a very small Venn Diagram group, but after seeing both Peter Dinklage & even old Billy Barty, one realizes that the talent pool isn't very large. Or rather, (apologies) deep.

[@hpaulbryant729]

And because the Drinker's critiques of Disney's shows are more entertaining than the shows themselves, he should get his own special section at Disneyland. Maybe even a ride..... we can call it the "Vomitron." A Multi-Media experience where riders are forced to watch a diverse cast deliver "the message" while spinning around in a cage with 11 other vomiting passengers.

[@theashpilez]

I do not watch the movies unless directed to by the multi faceted drinker...

[@ecurb10]

🤣🤣🤣

[@kasaibouF29]

Remember when Willow was just a story of a dwarf and a baby going on an adventure?

[@craigdaurizio686]

​@@privatecitizen5968 Greatest swordsman who ever lived.

[@craigdaurizio686]

@@privatecitizen5968 It is 💯

[@cassavaman3784]

"I am the greatest swordsman that ever lived" - Madmartagen

[@austinsavage]

i LOVED that movie and watched it multiple times

[@HowToChangeName]

No, I dont watch the 20th century version either

[@kaasmeester5903]

"Getting old and can't do magic anymore". That about sums up the current Disney corporation.

[@endoskel9262]

Painfully true…

[@wxwxsrg]

Or most humans... "magic" gets harder to do when you get old... look at James Cameron! His T levels got so low, he turned hostile against them!

[@Kodaiva]

Modern tv

[@kolossis8283]

@complete video here me when Willow is actually a tall man😔😔😔😔

[@FightOstinFight]

Holy shit. You’re right

[@michaelbauer2950]

I had a professor of creative writing once tell me when I was in college that "you cannot write characters who are smarter than yourself." I have been thinking about that a lot recently.

[@chasehedges6775]

As the Drinker says, “A character is only as smart as the person writing them.”

[@jackp492]

That’s hilarious, damn what a deep cut, sounds like a good teacher

[@GodwynDi]

I think you can, but to do so takes time and serious writing skill.

[@Sand_Dolphin]

There's a trick you can use. Since you as the writer are creating all the problems and dilemmas the characters will face, you know the answers to solve those things. Just trace backwards from the answer to the question and let your smart character follow that path.

[@dougrobinson8602]

@@GodwynDi Maybe; but if you haven't researched and consulted with people who have lots of knowledge about a subject, anyone who does have practical knowledge will know your character is full of shit.

[@bmack1708]

"Ginger plank of wood" checks so many diversity quota boxes, i'm surprised she doesn't have 3 roles in this show.

[@Launchpad05]

'SHE'S THE BESTEST EVARRRRR!'

[@kungfew1396]

Well she's mixed race ginger so her diversity hire points are huge! Seriously Kathleen Kennedy obviously just wants lgbt and no strong male leads in every Lucasfilm turd because she knows she can't be fired so why not.

[@NormanReaddis]

She's perfect and the industry knows it. A multiracial ginger really fits on the Gingercide narrative.

[@IndyDefense]

With her red hair, I wonder why she wasn't cast as Elora Danan?

[@beatsoara]

shes in everything... fuck!

[@sharifrancis9826]

I just love how the characters speak in a modern manner, and wear modern looking clothes, even though this is a medieval fantasy.

[@Pete_Ness]

And half of the old characters talk like they’re from old times, it’s so weird

[@kents.2866]

Yeah it's super weird. Like at least try? When the berry bush grew from magic I was expecting a response of "oh fucking Hella cool bro" 🤣 then you have people wearing jeans and shit. Just why?

[@xandertempelaar]

Halfway trough ep1 I was like: is this real?? It’s like watching Saved by The Bell.

[@goazer2]

I mean it worked for Xena Warrior Princess. But they can't remake that since it would remind people that there was a popular female led action series that outperformed the show it spun off from all the way back in the 90's which doesn't fit the woke narrative of women being oppressed.

[@KP-rs5tu]

They bought their clothes at Walmart in between scenes.

[@CSifjrixhrj]

I’m convinced that the best thing about these terrible shows and movies are the Critical Drinker reactions they prompt.

[@chrisakaschulbus4903]

Dead fish can't play instruments.

[@jimherold7827]

Fucking yes. I look forward far more to the Drinker's reviews on these abominations than the actual abominations.

[@peteclegg1578]

I never watch any of them - just here for the Drinker lolz. If he says something is good then I mentally flag it for future consumption.

[@willmrc1]

And the pitch meeting from Ryan George

[@luisvelez1952]

Sounds like this series should have never been made.

[@arekpetrosian4965]

We should all take just a moment to thank The Drinker for sparing us the horror of having to watch this show. He threw himself on that grenade, and he deserves our gratitude.

[@maxpower1413]

willow was a childhood favourite movie of mine so I watched the first episode full of enthusiasm. it felt like my heart had been ripped out, eaten and shat back on my face

[@mikespike2099]

Even after seeing his overview of the show I feel like throwing myself on a grenade!!! ... I feel very unwell.... my eyes burn!!!

[@luzifersohn5010]

The only thing i disagree with is: She Hulk IS still worse than willow.. but that doesnt mean willow was any good.

[@findmeanewname768]

I believe our drinking friend deserves a round of applause! This is the first time his “go away now” sounds more angry than drunk… I raise my glass to you drinker!

[@tyjones5019]

Well said!

[@Chilicharger665]

The "GO AWAY NOW" had more acting in it than all of Willow. Impressive.

[@mnomadvfx]

There was no acting, just tired resignation of a drunk Scotsman 😂🤣

[@timothygremlin9737]

Finally, Drinker has provided the Hulk we all deserve.

[@chayophan3078]

No shit, right?!? Well said and spot on!

[@eugenetswong]

I think that he was genuinely pissed off when he said it this time.

[@illusioNery]

Patrick Bateman: "Oooooo! :)"

[@jeffhoward162]

Worst part is, there were 2 books published as sequels to Willow that were excellent. They followed Elora Danan as she grew up and learned about her purpose, fleshed out the world, and showed Willow Ufgood after becoming a great wizard. It actually ticked all the necessary boxes for those all about "the message" tm, and was still a great sequel and conclusion to the original movie. Shadow Moon and Shadow Dawn, I believe they were called.

[@Regmuslima]

I had no idea there were books written as sequels. Definitely gonna add those to the list

[@banglefaar]

There where actually three.

[@HelcaraxeUlairi]

When I sat down to start watching this series. That’s what I was expecting…not the dumpster fire that was the series. I didn’t finish it

[@constantlyenthused336]

“Strong Female Character, Ginger Plank of Wood and a group of talentless diversity hires” is flawlessly put. This entire review is flawless

[@guyverjedi]

Ginger plank of wood ... I just took a mouthful of my drink ... I now have a wet crotch... thanks drinker.

[@chayophan3078]

Right?!? Only while watching the Drinker"s reviews do I experience so many conflicting emotions, sensory combos that I would have thought impossible! What else can induce one to laugh heartily while simultaneously gagging with rage-fueled nausea and disgust? Only the scorched earth, no-fucks-given critiques of the Drinker extraordinaire!

[@cagentz8581]

I loved the original movie. As such, I was hyped for this series. That lasted about as long as it took the screen to focus on Kit and Ginger wood plank. It’s a boring series that manages to take a dump on the original.

[@JohnInTheShelter]

Yeah, this is good stuff.

[@taz3810]

The only ginger they can have lol

[@aphthakid]

Disney's love for Ginger Plank of Wood is 100% based on what she looks like. Both Solo and Falcon and Winter Soldier did the same trick where she wears a helmet then in a dramatic moment takes it off and absolutely everything stops for a couple minutes because the creators are expecting everyone to have their entire worldview destroyed by this reveal. They also expect the audience, just like the other characters, to instantly forgive everything this character has done and desperately want to be her friend based solely on her appearance.

[@M4GG0TK1NG]

I'm fairly certain in both Solo and F/WS they intentionally made her look more ethnically ambiguous than she actually is because in Willow she just looks like a ginger but in those other titles she looks fairly brown skinned for a ginger. She just checks all the diversity boxes. I wouldn't be surprised if the actress was lesbian or bi cuz they care about that shit too

[@Laneous14]

I mean I've seen biracial people before, including black people with red hair. This girl is not really that unique and additionally looks like someone bashed her in her face with an ugly stick. On top of that she cannot act her way out of a wet paper bag. Honestly, I think it's more that she must be servicing Disney directors, producers, and Bob Iger multiple times a week.

[@richardmh1987]

Solo was such a forgetable movie that I don´t even know which character that actress played, as for Falcon and Winter Soldier, well I´m happy to say that the only Marvel thing I´ve seen since Endgame is No Way Home and that wasn´t from Disney ☺

[@Sure0Foot]

right?!?!? I specifically remember in Solo, seeing that ULTRA DRAMATIC REVEAL and thinking "...yeah, so? Who is she??? And why do I care??"

[@kreigalm7381]

correct, guess what that's called

[@elpretender1357]

I love it when the Drinker makes up nicknames for the characters and refuses to use the names they were given in the show. Such an entertaining power move

[@roboninja3194]

"Ocean Man" 😂

[@dercooney]

@@roboninja3194 mr nimbus? oh, that other guy - nimbus is cooler

[@mlamarana]

RIGHT!😂

[@tedferkin]

Probably helps avoid copyright strikes too. Drinker be a smart dude

[@travisspazz1624]

Seems childish. No wonder he watched Willow!

[@ianstrain4048]

"When a show literally takes the piss out of itself, it leaves me wonder what the hell I am supposed to do." Excellent!

[@krazy2dead]

Eloquent inebriation at it's zenith The Drinker can fix anything!

[@GaudiaCertaminisGaming]

Ginger Plank of Wood seems to have a cognitive force field around her. She’s so instantly forgettable that seeing her any time is like seeing her for the first time.

[@Laneous14]

Every time I see her I think 'ouch, that's unfortunate'. Often, biracial people get the best of both worlds, but, uh, not her.

[@Vaultboythefightingmachine]

The name Ginger Plank of wood is the only thing you can remember her by.

[@benjaminlangner]

Who? Her?

[@roystonlodge]

It's not like she's ever had a decent script to work from.

[@manug9781]

Ginger who?

[@khylerbane4523]

This was the most aggressive “go away now” ever. I think we finally broke Drinker with Willow.

[@jamesbrown4092]

Almost made me jump out of my chair. Sounded scarier than my ex-wife!

[@SpaceshipRocketFuel]

When he said it, I felt it.

[@Animanarchy]

I better hurry to the next video before he gets the bouncer to throw me out.

[@jamesbrown4092]

Fake channel reported to KZbin and Telegram. I think I know what you can do with your 'reward'.

[@daynechastant]

Raise your glass to a man who watches complete tripe so we don't have to...and discovering gems we never knew existed.

[@rainbowslushy223]

“Thats all I’ve got for today, go away now” has never been said with more disappointment

[@brians132]

@Flash bang Bastard

[@r0w5tortion84]

I'd say anger more than disappointment. I can't remember a drinker review where he was this angry

[@Sekir80]

@@r0w5tortion84 Yea. this go away was pretty harsh, but I don't blame the poor soul for it.

[@MrX-zz2vk]

It's time for Disney to just go away now. They're not even trying anymore. And they don't even care that they're not trying.

[@BrianWenger]

I hear more rage. The most disappointment I've heard was in one of the older Star Wars ones.

[@drewpooters62]

Gentlemen, it's been an honor watching the fall of intelligent entertainment with you.....

[@SRMoore1178]

What the heck is wrong with the studios and writers these days? This new generation of modern writers and creators are so far up their own asses. They don't seem to take a hint or learn any lessons from their constant failures and don't have the talent or guts to make anything original. Maybe the upcoming failure of Indy 5 will be a turning point. Whenever I'm tired of dealing with the BS and the people of the world we live in today, I like to sit back, relax, and watch TV that reflects the world we live in today.

[@Michael_CDK]

Godspeed, Drew Pooters.

[@willharkness8052]

I never thought I would see the fall of creativity with someone called Drew Pooters.

[@garyslayton8340]

Its not all bad The amazon prime Reacher show got funding for a season 2 Shit is amazing

[@velkanzi]

@@SRMoore1178You answered your own question in the second sentence.

[@justinlast2lastharder749]

Willow was a perfectly self contained movie. There was no cliff hanger. There was no Lore...there was only the events of that movie. It did not need a Sequel, prequel, ANYTHING.

[@davidmckown3590]

Actually it did get a sequel of sorts as a trilogy of novels called Chronicles of the Shadow War written by Chris Claremont and George Lucas. I haven’t read them but I heard they were not good.

[@SignoftheMagi]

@@davidmckown3590 I read them. They are ok. Not great but at least makes logical sense.

[@albertosillywhips7281]

Right? When I heard there was remake, my first thought was "Why?"

[@heikkint]

'self contained' huh.... sounds so familiar. 4chan needed /mlp/ as a containment board years ago and it started to live a life on it's own. I would not mind if garbage would be 'contained' in this area as well.

[@teabearchurchill5600]

@@SignoftheMagi In point of fact they SUCK. And that's speaking as a fan of both Chris Claremont and Willow in general. Hint: In the first chapter of the first book, EVERYBODY DIES who was in the movie. Except for Willow, who inexplicably changes his name in the first few pages.

[@4862cjc]

That was the most emotionally charged “Go away now” I have ever heard!

[@thomasask828]

The Drinker seems absolutely enraged in that moment. As a fan of the movie in the 80's, and as someone who has become a huge fan of the fantasy genre mostly because of the movie, I totally understand the level of vehemence in that simple line. I wish the writers who keep doing this, would just "go away now" as well.

[@maybenot909]

I actually shook from it I was scared

[@bobman929]

Thought I was going to get punched then

[@brettpierotte2954]

Felt like when your favorite teacher finally loses it with the class

[@SilverSpade92]

♫ The Drinker knows you’re watching♩ ♩He knows you’re in bad shape ♫ ♫ You better go away now,♩ ♫ or you just might seal your fate! ♫ ♫ You better run fast, you better not try, to embrace the wokeness or thumbs-down this review. ♩ ♫ Critical Drinker will always, find you ♫ Happy Halloween- I mean holidays!

[@mehitablestorm8877]

It's amazing how EVERY FANTASY SERIES turns out to be.....just like our world today.....which I'm always trying to escape.

[@gsofficial]

I mean they DON'T reflect the world we live in today, either, because in no world can an anorexic teenage girl win a fight against anyone.

[@theslay66]

Well, you know, a world where minorities are the majority... only magic can explain this paradox.

[@benoitmatters3674]

@@gsofficial Actually they reflect it quite well. Megan Markle is a good example, a mind numbingly incompetent chronic liar but apparently a hero no matter how undeserving or ridiculous that notion is, and it must be true because sheep like whatever they are told is trending on social media. Just like this punishing series, it is complete garbage and you can look forward to a trans character in season 2.

[@u.a1952]

@@benoitmatters3674 perfectly said

[@CHarris1066]

Seriously, there are like 72 genders now, they will push this BS into the fantasy world no doubt, they will probably somehow put covid propaganda in this sh*t. Victim mentality. Black people seemingly common in fng anglo saxon Brittain, and also the star of the show, unless a pink haired non binary trans woman knight doesnt win out on the victim scale.

[@cRAVEtrance]

The show felt like someone's spoiled tweener niece wrote her own fantasy novel, who promotly nagged to have her aunt/uncle at Disney turn it into a show, and the execs, hamstrung to turn the questionably "done" script into a show, retconned Willow into the script, BECAUSE THAT WAS THE ONLY WAY THEY WERE GONNA CON ANYONE INTO WATCHING IT.

[@Rich_H_1972]

Disney are the only company that consistently makes me feel I've been ripped off when I watch their stuff. For free. That takes some effort guys, well done.

[@hiamaraldvaan7221]

Im really mad there is no more movies for real men to enjoy and how they force to worship fake women characters.

[@olafgurke4699]

Ikr? Even when you pirate that shit, you want your money back.

[@Maria_Erias]

@@hiamaraldvaan7221 As much as they try, they can't take the 80s and 90s away from us. It's Christmas time. Time to fire up the ol' Christmas classics, like Die Hard.

[@DmytroBogdan]

@@olafgurke4699 you want your time back. So 10-12 min of Drinker's video is enough for me to skip this show altogether

[@Slaggedfire]

Time is the most valuable currency you have. You definitely got ripped off.

[@blampfno]

Every time the entertainment industry releases a project for 'modern audiences' I grow more thankful that humans have limited lifespans.

[@Rick-fc3kc]

All the “modern audience” talk makes me nostalgic for the Dark Ages

[@xycap8351]

I LOVED WILLOW THIS IS NOT WILLOW

[@sheridoncary2602]

@user-vz4qv8rl1f yeah at least shit was interesting at that time

[@scottmcfadyen293]

Brilliant ! that's a great quote.

[@cagneybillingsley2165]

when 80% the show are intentionally ugly people or lesbians, you know it's going to be terrible

[@Wagnar6000]

These drinker videos are actually the only way I take in modern movies and shows these days.

[@quademasters249]

Me too. There's been absolutely nothing released I've cared enough for to climb out of my computer chair.

[@EonSlumber]

He is the “let me go first” guy.

[@pokerabend1]

you can also watch brandon tenold, his topic is different he goes on cultrashmovies with a little humor.

[@meestabond7583]

He is singlehandedly saving millions of our cumulative hours and deserves a drink from all of us for his noble efforts

[@skiltonjackmusic]

Yup

[@meganfoster8838]

Now Sorsha was a REAL strong female character who switched sides for the sake of a good man. Wouldn't we have loved to see her and Madmartigan having adventures while raising Elora and the other kids?

[@PorchBandit]

though I agree...I'll leave asking Val Kilmer to lose 25kg and stop being a dick on set to you lol

[@michaelmartin4552]

The only problem there would be real life. In real life, Val Kilmer and Joanne Whalley got married, and then divorced 8 years later. And add to that Val had cancer which resulted in his larynx being removed.

[@jps6071]

Now Sorsha was a REAL strong female character... yeah - and sadly this series turned her into a useless, incompetent and hypocritical piece of trash, who first tears down her daughter for "disrespecting and insulting" her brother the "crown prince", two minutes before insulting and belittling said crown prince herself, is entirely unable to do anything useful when a group of enemies just walks into her castle and kidnaps that prince right under her nose and then instead of sending an army, rather sends her daughter and only other child with a small group that includes her "politically important" fiancy and endangers their lives too for no good reason. Similar like the Star Wars sequels did it with Leia.

[@myfi5h]

That was the angriest “go away now” yet. The drinker might be done with Disney on a whole new level.

[@axelhopfinger533]

Yeah, that definitely was a "go away now!" that holds a deep, personal grudge and is absolutely, unequivocally done with this shit and is determined to make the one's responsible for it regret it dearly! 😠

[@samcochran8203]

That "go away now" came from a place of deep seated anger, and honestly, I feel like I have that exact same tone stuck to the on button nowadays when it comes to things made for "MODERN AUDIENCES"

[@tommymarco]

that was the best ending for this garbage. it sounds like a terrible series

[@davidfitnesstech]

I hope not. I must see the drinker do more Disney reviews. They're 100 times better than the actual movies.

[@UchihaOokami2596]

Honestly I feel that this show might have been the kicker. I almost feel that while the Drinker had valid criticisms for the original movie, it might have been a childhood favorite to him. Thats just the feel of vitriol I get from his "go away now" that kinda matches how I sometimes feel with the shit being pumped out. I just don't care but then there's the shit that hits home for something near and dear.

[@edub1170]

when The Critical Drinker says "Because this show has to reflect the world we live in today" it's hilarious every time to me 🤣

[@-taz-]

It doesn't REFLECT the world we live in, though. It PROJECTS the world they want us to live in.

[@nigeltheoutlaw]

All I can think of when I see guuuurl bosses is Mauler saying "you go girl!" over and over in his Black Widow review.

[@dealanocluaid1012]

I prefer nah it'll be fine

[@jgobroho]

I love when he starts doing his laugh too lol

[@Muckylittleme]

They write their characters how they want young people to be because it is all about destroying Western society and traditional and natural societal roles.

[@TheWarmachine375]

Tolkien was right about evil never create, only corrupt all the good things into twisted caricatures they made out of it.

[@Veronica.John10-10]

The Bible says that too before Tolkien did 🙂

[@arturiaarthus8367]

whenever someone quotes Tolkien, it's always wrong. at least google the actual quote, and actually quote the man. ffs.

[@justin9744]

Please, stop.

[@WhiteWolf126]

@@arturiaarthus8367 Melkor spent his spirit in envy and hate, until at last he could make nothing save in mockery of the thought of others, and all their work he destroyed if he could.

[@arturiaarthus8367]

@@WhiteWolf126 thank you very much

[@amilitarymind]

That was an unusually furious and angry "Go away now ". This show must have really gotten under the skin of our Drinker. We appreciate what you have to go through for us brother 😂

[@pietropes1322]

I love how I have no intention of ever watching these trashy shows but as soon as the Drinker does a vid I'm here loving every second.

[@Richterdgf]

You and me both. Most of what currently passes for entertainment is so terrible, the only value it has to offer is as fodder for KZbin critics to rip apart. Disney owes the Drinker a debt of gratitude, for it is through his skewering that this show finally manages to have a justification, however small, for its own existence.

[@runek100]

Yeah its great, I know what is comming out in the world and see how it all crumbling down. And I have fun.

[@rapidroadsode8789]

I thought it was just me

[@adamgardner2244]

Me too lol

[@emixmim]

Same here, it's just way more entertaining than these shows would ever be. I'd take 10 minutes with the drinker than 10 hours of shit TV.

[@ohhhreallynow9056]

Goodness. Never heard Critical Drinker be so angry at his go away now. This show had really taken a toll on him.

[@thomassmart4088]

ask Shad about caravans

[@petriew2018]

honestly, in a year where the concept of art was set back by several decades, even this steaming cesspit really stands out as the biggest pile of flaming trash imaginable. Rings of Power was bad, but Willow is just.... infantile at every level....

[@randyjones3050]

Well, he did have to go watch all 3+ hours of "Avatar 2" immediately after. That's enough to make even the most sane of men lose their shit.

[@jkfozul2316]

@@petriew2018 worse than rings of power???

[@petriew2018]

@@jkfozul2316 yes. it's objectively worse writing than Rings of Power. Rings of power looks really bad when compared to the source material, but on it's own it's just a convoluted, stuck up, generic fantasy show. Boring and predictable as fuck. but Willow? Every character, every plot point, every bit of world building is just so incredibly.... dumb.... like, actively insulting the viewer levels of dumb.... it's relentless in how stupid it all is

[@darrenortez9816]

I remember Warwick Davis had a show on HBO called Life's too short. And on that show one of the jokes was the possibility of remaking Willow and how ridiculous it would be

[@EvilDoresh]

I guess that was before he got the check from Disney.

[@fullstackweebdev]

I can't wait for him to bring up "The Top 10 biggest Disney+ flops" on Tenable at some point. That'll be brilliant.

[@NeroLeMorte]

Disney money money to stronq

[@DeezNuggz]

warwick davis reminds of a football for some reason...

[@NMemone]

Every once in a while I randomly rewatch that "Liam Neeson wants to do comedy" scene. One of the funniest things Ricky Gervais has ever done

[@experiencedgoat9884]

As a ginger we don't claim the ginger plank of wood as our own. But her character has no soul so she can blend in with other gingers

[@indy_go_blue6048]

She looks like an NPC to me.

[@snapperjessen]

@@indy_go_blue6048 NPC being No Personality Characteristics?

[@shuttittuppitt9355]

Channeling Cartman, are we?

[@thefanwithoutaface8105]

This is really freaking sad. Willow was a fun, classic 80s sword and sorcery film. It wasn't anything too groundbreaking, but it was fun, with good effects, a likeable cast of characters, a memorable world and an outstanding soundtrack. This just spits all over that.

[@chasehedges6775]

Just depressing what’s happening to our entertainment and our good stuff.

[@LoneWolf-wp9dn]

@Chad 007 dont do that shit... people will flag you too

[@polarvortex6601]

no, it was shit.

[@Pentti_Hilkuri]

Willow was one the first movies I saw in the theater as kid. The new Willow is like a nicely aged milk version of it.

[@kahuna7433]

Way to trash my childhood hero😂✌️

[@laythbarzangi8477]

_"The diarrhoea-splattered toilet bowl of modern entertainment"_ is the most aptly poetic description I've ever heard. Trust the Drinker to give us gems like this. 😆

[@WolfSyndrome]

The Angry Video Game Nerd walked so that Drinker could run.

[@LARDYCHRIST]

He's certainly got a way with words 😆

[@johnnycastellanetta7183]

Dear Drinker, We, as fans of yours and of storytelling in general, be it film, television, and other media, would like to acknowledge your sacrifice in experiencing this drivel in order to produce entertainment for all of us. It's really a shame that so much of modern media doesn't offer much else of value. I think I can speak for at least a lot of people that watch your content when I say cheers for being a voice for fans of storytelling. Keep on wading through, and we'll keep watching.

[@andrewvanorden2336]

I like how you used the word "drivel" instead of wrongly saying "dribble" like so many idiots do nowadays. cough cough Itsagundam

[@jamesupton4996]

Speak for yourself.

[@johnnycastellanetta7183]

@@andrewvanorden2336 I literally hate it when people use literally wrong, too. It's literally another of my pet peeves. 😋 *shutter* 😋 I would of written you a better reply, but I literally didn't want to put more effort into it. 😋

[@johnnycastellanetta7183]

@@jamesupton4996 Thanks for your contribution to the discussion. No one is forced to agree with me or allow me to speak for them, of course. Duly noted. I filed your comment in my very important comments place. 🚮

[@juggernautheadcrush4161]

@@andrewvanorden2336 Gundam does that intentionally. It's part of his schtick.

[@RollTide1987]

And now it's being removed from Disney+

[@brockdavid]

“That escalated quickly… I mean that really got out of hand.” 😂

[@Hodaris_Darlin]

Good!

[@KaiserSaucy]

It’s gotten to the point now that I don’t even have to watch the actual show anymore to enjoy The Drinker’s surly rants… 👏👏

[@panthrax555]

It will be a shame if hollywood ever goes back to decent writing, because drinker will be reduced to writing simple scripts full of praise instead of these masterfully comical takedowns.

[@brianhaugh152]

The Drinker watches it so we don't have to. 😏

[@stephenschenider4007]

I really don't even watch movies or shows anymore and love his rants. Also makes me feel like I'm not missing much.

[@NealKlein]

I wouldn't place so much stock in his reviews if he didn't work so hard on making them intelligent, edifying deconstructions. Baby, if I want actual rants that offer no points proving their arguments, there's a ton of mediocre KZbin channels out there I could punish myself with.

[@michaeld5888]

We need a way to see the unintentional comedy in these shows without actually having to endure them. Life is a comedy now written by people without a trace of humour. Best to just savour the prime extracts from those bold and noble people who make that sacrifice and endure the whole sorry saga rewritten to correct the past 'incorrect' thinking for us. In the the UK we wait in dread for the latest crop of multi cultural attitude corrected rehashes of Dicken's 'A Christmas Carol' which will surely soon be upon us. Corrected of course by people who know far better.

[@Laughing.Lion.]

Ginger plank of wood is exactly the future they have in mind. That's why she's so popular.

[@Muckylittleme]

Exactly They write their characters how they want young people to be because it is all about destroying Western society and traditional and natural societal roles.

[@michaellane5381]

Tbh I had hoped she was going to be the girl from the movie just so she would matter more and so the party would not be as unbalanced... And then the maid crossed the bridge and I could see what was coming while I hoped it wouldn't...

[@castleaether1965]

My thoughts exactly; blending everything everywhere into one amorphous mass until nothing is unique or special ... a bland, tasteless hell of forced homogeniety. And I'm not talking about the TV shows.

[@advictoriam3106]

Oh my god Erin Kellyman is in this?! Ahhh I can't wait! She's my favouritist! I love nothing more than watching someone with the same emotionless, dead eyed expression on her face no matter if she's the happiest she's ever been or she's watching a friend die. It's so amazing that the only indication of how she's feeling comes from an amazingly written dialogue where she can say her feelings instead of showing them because that's how people display emotions of course.

[@MegaJani]

[cries in sorrow]

[@leejones5810]

@Trent Hamsley 🤣😂🤔😂🤣😂 I've not seen that font before

[@carabe197]

I recognized her because of her teeth, not by her face

[@chasehedges6775]

She was so meh in Solo

[@somerandomguy9891]

Who's that? The ginger one?

[@KK-ib4uf]

The plank of wood was the plank of wood in falcon and winter soldier as well. It's amazing how she kept the consistency. I guess she's got magical lady parts. How else is she getting all those roles?

[@xminusone1]

She's multi-ethnic AND a lesbian. I'm surprised they didn't make her their official spokeperson already and that she don't have 4 roles in that serie.

[@IvanOrdell]

She's the best example of what's wrong with Hollywood / Disney / Netflix casting post 2019

[@SuicidalSummerSnowWoman]

she is mixed and most importantly, u can actually see it when u look at her plus ofc she is a woman so yeah they HAVE to take her in every disney project

[@goazer2]

What worries me about that is she started in Solo when she was definitely not yet 18.

[@richknudsen5781]

Her only magic part is mostly used while on her knees in front of the producers.

[@DiggitySlice]

The episode where strong female character and ginger plank of wood beat the shit out of each other to accurately represent same sex relationships brought a tear to my eye.

[@bluglon16epickyhrac45]

Nooooooooo FEMALES! Whatever will we do?!

[@omosango7870]

The bestest couple evar!!!!

[@UnbeltedSundew]

Best comment, you deserve a pin.😆

[@wheeliebin18]

Fuckin' LOL XD

[@Afrologist]

Topkek you've obliterated my sides

[@TheHilltopPillbox]

Can we just take a moment to thank TCD for watching all this crap so we don't have to? He has literally saved me dozens of hours of personal tragedy. To TCD: A heartfelt "Thank you".

[@SundraTanakoh]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/kHiTl5SNYrGFkLc

[@Kekoapono]

Personally, I’m still experiencing that tragedy, even without watching the show. But, perhaps my suffering would’ve been even worse if I had actually watched it.

[@abuyusha8740]

Yeah dude, thanks for taking the bullet time and again.

[@kartoffelman111]

@@Kekoapono You've basically got the condensed bitter pill version of what would otherwise have been a large kettle full of shit to slowly slurp down. I prefer the pill in this case. The agony is the same but at least it steals less of our precious time.

[@TG-fe7si]

Ya I agree 😉👍

[@luisnunes3863]

Drinker, every repetition of "strong female character and ginger plank of wood" had me in stiches.

[@andrewpetik2034]

Exactly the same response from me! Hilarious!! 😂

[@msfussyb]

Same😂😂

[@osmanyousif7849]

I find that actually insulting to call her Plank, because in Ed Edd N Eddy, Plank has way more personality.

[@fredtott4684]

And that laugh at 3:26 Epic !!!

[@ronanjager3829]

@@osmanyousif7849 were talking about real life planks like the ones you can smash your hands through like in karate, not a cartoon.

[@CasualChairEnjoyer]

I love the part where the guy says, 'You gotta be vigilant out here or you die.' then he dies for a gag, not getting any character development. Also they manage to not see or hear like 12 guys on horseback on a giant, open, flag field.

[@EH_1995]

Disney & Marvel have been so generous to us this year.. so many terrible shows for the Drinker to make videos about. Thanks guys, I'm sure you'll continue this excellent run into 2023

[@MrSuckeragi]

they just want to make sure drinker has his lights on for christmas this year

[@gregbirger5810]

The sheer artistry of the Drinker in calling out the pig swill that's supposed to pass as modern entertainment exceeds the writing capabilities of the entire writing staff on this new show. You, sir, are a wordsmith swordsman.

[@ScotsThinker]

Drinker is a writer himself, so what you said makes sense.

[@mikespike2099]

Ginger Singularity!!! Hahahaha..... she is like a carrot Go11iw0g doll!

[@stan7816]

I didn't know until recently he's a published author. 10+ novels.

[@sarcasticprick]

One might say he’s a cunning linguist.

[@gregbirger5810]

@@stan7816 And about to be a filmmaker. There's a short film project backed via successful kickstarter based on the main character in his novels. It's in pre-production now. Proud backer of this one, very eager to see what he and the team he's working with are able to pull off, unbound by the shackles of (Hollywood) mediocrity.

[@misterbeach8826]

Here's the shocker: This Willow was written by Jonathan Kasdan, writer of Solo: A Star Wars Story, and... the upcoming Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny. Talent and all...

[@Edfiki86]

Let me just check out early life…. Just a coincidence

[@mrderp1292]

@@Edfiki86 Stop noticing things!

[@jwilde642]

Proof that talent isn't necessarily inheritable.

[@dodywidodo9433]

Jonathan is no Lawrence sadly

[@handroids1981]

@@Edfiki86 Every. Fucking. Time!

[@waynehewett4017]

Worse than shehulk ! That's one thing I never thought you would say my friend ! And we both thought the studio couldn't possibly get any lower We both were proven wrong I spose the challenge now is to make something even worse that willow and break that record too

[@AdityaSingh-lb6wg]

I seriously laughed everytime he called her " ginger plank of wood" 😝

[@pederhalvorsen2289]

FRECKLE JESUS!! 🤣🤣

[@m.redleg252]

It was even better when he speculated that having 2 redheads n the same movie would destroy the universe.

[@jamesrad6317]

The ginger singularity that could destroy the universe was what got me 🤣

[@louisduarte8763]

@@m.redleg252 And he lives in Scotland, and that's full of redheads, right? It's a wonder the universe didn't collapse in on itself already!

[@salvation7362]

Ellie Bamber (Dove/Elora) actually has red hair, my guess is she was hired first and then Disney's "red headed chosen one" came on board and they had Ellie dye her hair blonde because they didn't have one of those yet. This show is a shining example of what happens when you have to tick off all the boxes of a check list FIRST and then figure out how a story can be made with the results. I think that's how Shakespeare got his start.

[@Auxius.]

Could be a wig, I bet you the show is going to do a dramatic ginger hair reveal ‘omg it’s Alora after all’, while she’s already been revealed as being her in ep2. Truly wouldn’t put it past them to be like this. Mother of god.

[@Auxius.]

Nevermind, she’s blonde at the bafta awards. Absolutely puzzling.

[@tommymarco]

@@Auxius. theses people are hard to track mate :)

[@danandtab7463]

the dumbest thing besides the hair is the idea that they were making any kind of sincere effort at hiding who she was. and whoever wrote that into the show forgot that she was a very prescient baby in the movies, being fully aware of everything going on and who she is, according to dialogue from the glowing lady.

[@TheMeta141]

holy shit that is so much darker than i thought. they made their 1 other redhead dye her hair. holy shit redheads are getting the Star Wars black character treatment.

[@alex-c7567]

"I can smell the writer's room" is a classic drinker line.

[@Laneous14]

Stale, unwashed clams is a very distinct odor.

[@wavion2]

@@Laneous14 I feel like there should be curry also... stale, unwashed clams and curry.

[@MyenMarlkin]

Oh. Ginger plank of wood is actually a "lesbian" and "multiracial". Explains why she's getting all those roles and that they are really high on her.

[@CIintB3ASTW0oD]

Willow might not be LOTR, but it was one of the very _few_ fantasy movies we had back in the 80s that managed to scratch multiple itches. Not to mention Madmartigan was played charmingly well by Val Kilmer. It might not have aged as well, but it's still a fun watch.

[@Volkerkatzki]

And the sequel book series is a very good fantasy story.

[@n.l.4626]

Willow didn't age well because LotR happened; because before that it was more or less the best fantasy movie we had.

[@brianpeck4035]

@@n.l.4626 Conan bette

[@krizan1]

Yes, along with 'The Never Ending Story' & 'The Dark Crystal': 'Willow' was one of my favourite movies. 🤗

[@barrywhittingham6154]

@@krizan1 Add Legend to that list.

[@asifalimirza]

Red haired plank is most likely one of the daughters of one of the Disney producers. I grew up in Los Angeles and went to a HS full of kids who's parents were Hollywood producers or movie execs. Their kids would show up in all kids of movies, but most never made it past being an extra. The only actress in my HS that made it was Patricia Arquette and her brother David. Robert...I mean Alexis (Ahem) didn't quite make it

[@anon7596]

Kathleen Kennedy's gf 🤣

[@MrLuiguimaster]

That "go away now” was specially powerful and intense this time. Thank you, drinker.

[@Charlie-fk4ly]

From the first words alone, I can seriously feel the anger from his tone. I can really feel how Drinker was holding his temper as he explained the disaster that is Willow. And, it is at the end that he really snapped.

[@mnomadvfx]

I can understand it - WIllow is one among many 80s films that defined my childhood so I would feel the same way.

[@cornelius8617]

This video was one of his most funny videos so I hope he gets angry more often.

[@eugenetswong]

Yeah, as I said in another thread: I think that he was genuinely angry this time.

[@codemaxim3168]

Damn! You felt that one too ehh!?

[@gordonpromish9218]

yeah, he seems actually wrathy in this one

[@PatrickBurdine]

I am sure the writer's room was saying "yaaas queen" every time they wrote a strong female character line.

[@cleveryoutubename4445]

The only acceptable use of “yaaass queen” is when Captain Holt says it.

[@benkraze3103]

lol

[@BluuSkyz]

I felt like I personally invaded the drinkers personal space and was annoying him when he told us to go away. Willow did a toll on him.. stay strong drinker.

[@teekay_1]

@teleg871 I tried, but it said you must first send us your credit card number to reach you. We're waiting for your credit card number.

[@Ickygrunt]

He said this was worse than she hulk I think he would have rather you invade his space

[@JohnnyBoyDNDcomic]

You can almost ignore the video and completely judge his reviews based on the “go away now”. I remember he had one that just felt tired and broken at the end of his game of thrones review

[@jezebulls]

That was probably the most aggressive “go away now” send off

[@TK421-53]

What I don’t understand is the contradiction between the drive to reboot old movies, yet the insufferable need to reimagine these stories with current sensitivities and drenched in identity politics (political correctness). This is clearly painting by the numbers by modern production companies, take one part “known story” add “all political correct tick boxes” add “mediocre moralism” mix and presto “modern TV show / Movie”. Lack of actual creativity, lack of talent, lack of daring to stick their necks out, lack of originality etc. Let’s be honest, the entertainment business is a reflection of our society - a shallow and empty illusion. So how can anyone expect a modern reboot of a mediocre movie at best be anything but complete shit?

[@lorpis8284]

Congratulations! You made it further than I did before turning it off for good. It' felt like it was written by teenagers for teenagers in a high school drama class. It wasn't just the unrelatable obsessing that means very little in the face of inhalation, or the acting that came across like no one wanted to be there, it was the little things. Like how their cloths always looked bright and laundered while living rough on a hike across the country side; the musical score that lacked the levity of the original; and, the lack of common dark prejudices and social statues that brought importance to the presence of Madmartigan and provided a personal struggle for willow relatable in some way to all ages. It should be mandatory for any adventure writer to maybe go on an adventure and live in the wild for a time, or at least step outside their gilded life to see what a competent adventurer and high stakes life choices looks like. This show would have been much better off for it.

[@yumyumeatemup]

The fact that Ginger Plank-O-Wood only ever "happens" in Disney titles is a sure sign that she isn't ever going to legitimately happen LMAO

[@beatsoara]

i hope so!

[@chucksenhowzen9740]

The ginger plank has got to be one of the ugliest things I’ve ever seen. God help it when that thing turns 30 🤮🤮🤮

[@zappodude7591]

@@MundaneThingsBackwards That was also a bot.

[@avikaurelius4992]

The Disney casting department got an instant hard-on when they saw her. “Hey Jeff, you know how we always replace red-head characters with black one?” “Yeah, Bob, I know” “Well, you’re about to shit” *shows red-haired black girl*

[@99Vood99]

Lol I prefer Nerdrotic's 'Freckled Jesus' instead! 🤣🤣🤣

[@sorrelakbishop]

Thank you, Drinker. I salute you, sir. Many fans can now avoid the trauma you've suffered. Your selfless sacrifice is not in vain.

[@andreavenaa]

Right. Learn from others mistakes and save yourself some pain.

[@ryanmiller5473]

My wife loved the movie and I also liked it, we we’re planning on binge watching it together. We didn’t get 10min in and said F it. Absolute dumpster fire.

[@scottmantooth8785]

*long live the Drinkers Liver...may it continue to thrive and be impervious to all forms of recreational ethanol for the sake of enduring cinematic suppositories such as this*

[@PrincessFionaYT]

I love the drinker. But let’s be fair, none of us thought this was gonna be good and none of us were going to watch it anyway. He didn’t save us from anything but he certainly entertained the heck out of us after the fact.

[@MikeTXBC]

In reference to Madmartigan, the reason Val Kilmer isn't in the show is because he's recovering from throat cancer and has had several operations that've rendered his voice practically useless. So in this case, it's not a bad decision by Disney, it's that the actor in question is incapable to play the role due to poor health and complications from treatment.

[@austinsavage]

im just surprised they did not race-swap his character to be a Japanese transgender lesbian

[@demonsmoke1788]

Well also considering that the queen is also his ex-wife in real life and this is the movie the "fell in love" and now they hate each other... not surprising there too

[@Jayskiallthewayski]

Damn, that "Go away now" was mad af. Oh and I love how Warwick Davis said on Twitter that the shooting was gruesome but that he did it all for us. Guess he did it for free out of pure enthousiasm....and it shows.

[@joshuajohnson9390]

You know it's bad when you're nostalgic for the 2010's

[@incurableromantic4006]

It's amazing how things like the Star-Wars prequels and the Star Trek films from the 90s, now seem like "The good old days". That's just depressing.

[@SaladHate]

These strong female characters are so strong so they forced me to turn off the movie right at the moment when i first time looked at them. What a great power

[@Trektech1980]

Everything you said was spot on in this review 🤣🤣🤣 I loved the Willow movie and tried to watch this. I got to the 3rd episode and when the two farm Ladies wearing clothes from the Bass Pro shop were introduced I gave up. They already weren't taking the story or acting serious, so when they gave up on the costumes I did too.

[@MagcargoMan]

I was utterly baffled when I saw that. He showed it briefly in the video but I'm disappointed Drinker didn't bring it up.

[@TI4438]

Never would have guessed that was a clip from the show! I wondered why it was in the vid. WOW!

[@Trektech1980]

@TheGlassesPro 🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@RawOlympia]

😅🤣😂🤣

[@arcanetraditions]

Your deadpan comedic attacks on the blatant issues with modern cinema, are an absolute gem.

[@Fedaygin]

@secret5017 Soooo same spammed comment with different handle & profile avatar. Alrighty ^^

[@dlewis9760]

@@Fedaygin KZbin won't stop them. they never do. They go after people posting wrong speak.

[@Fedaygin]

@@dlewis9760 That's bad.. :/ Thumb up as thanks for saying.. I still keep doing this in some content creator pages that i like to follow. I wish you relaxing upcoming Yule Holidays & launch of new year once we've gone around the star

[@lastridge]

When they wrote Kit, you just KNOW the brain-dead writing room was thinking she was super-cool and edgy.

[@andysalter7192]

Yep, I am sure the writers room full of 20 something woke cult Feminists thought she was the embodiment of awesome!

[@j.rebekah8605]

'A gender confused angst filled millennial will be fun for audiences! So relatable!'

[@westhorizon2472]

@@j.rebekah8605 😂 As a millennial, I still found her ass annoying.

[@xminusone1]

@@j.rebekah8605 I bet she's relatable for the people who wrote these series but that's about it.

[@Kermit_the_God]

​@@j.rebekah8605millennials are in their 30s and 40s. Need to update your hated generations. I'm a 42 year old millennial. That chick isn't 40

[@XeniaChow]

Please PLEASE Disney, go make a season 2. I would love to see you waste money on it.

[@icepicjoey]

@Chad 007 a full clip that explains what? Reported spammer.

[@Noperare]

The problem is, that is YOUR money. Between ESG score and bayouts, the entire USA will become Venezuela before the government let Disney broke.

[@Veronica.John10-10]

Except that our kids will watch this s***.

[@ayushshukla6823]

They will just subsidise it and get tax write off to make up the cost.

[@atronic1234]

@Chad 007 you are a scammer spammer, fr

[@alexscott1257]

"Using safety scissors to open bags of crisps" pretty much sums up society these days. The Drinker's gone done it again!

[@benjaminshort4169]

Drinker during the usual episode: "Go away now." Drinker during this episode: "GO AWAY NOW" I actually flinched because the change was so jarring.

[@BlazeHeartPanther]

I chuckled at that sudden change of aggravation

[@matthewvanburen6415]

Never heard a more angry go away now from him.

[@RogueAstronomer]

Every man has his breaking point.

[@PatrickKniesler]

Worse than rings of power certainly deserves it.

[@TheHilltopPillbox]

1980's: Two best friends find themselves about to be separated because they want to follow different paths. No problem. They congratulate each other and wish each other the best before heading off. 2022: Two best friends find themselves about to be separated because they want to follow different paths. BIG problem. Each character complains that the other doesn't respect their feelings, and that they should just continue on in their current state because...feelings. Skip to Act III - Both characters suddenly possess all the skills needed to defeat the enemy.

[@ebaugh7320]

It's hilarious because it's true

[@linzenmeyer]

They were salty because they didnt get to scissor each other.

[@bujharvard9313]

@@linzenmeyer How goddamn unoriginal can this show be?!?! When the two lezbos are about to make out, they play the same damn song that was played during the lesbian sex scene in Monster. The use of modern rock music in this show is extremely inappropriate.

[@GT-ft1iz]

Sad part is that the Willow books that were made by Chris Clairemont were really good IMO. They follow Elora and develop her character really well. I was afraid the "new" show would be a disaster. Damn it, Disney... you did it again.

[@LordVader1094]

@secret5017 We're literally watching it here already, bot

[@WinterLady87]

Absolutely love the books, they were my favorites when I was a teen

[@Crunch_Buttsteak]

They weren't woke enough so Disney tossed em

[@LiveLongAndProsperHonestly]

I rolled my eyes very hard when the brother was kidnapped and she was the only one who could go save him. I rolled my eyes even harder when I realized every single male in the show an episode and a half into the show was a mix of: Supreme Idiot, Ragemonster, Exposition Man, Spineless Dweeb, Bumbling Old Man. I didn't make it to the end of the second episode. I saw the awful writing on the wall complete with a giant middle finger composed of feminine hygiene products right next to it. Months later, everyone sane saw how awful it was and they cancelled it, and removed it from their service most likely as a tax write off.

[@GothPaoki]

I like how people talk in a medieval like world like they talk in modern social media!!

[@IndyDefense]

To be fair, the OG Willow didn't have medeival-sounding dialogue either except for one point, where it mocks that kind of dialogue with Madmartigan falling for Sorsha.

[@garym6315]

Modern writers don't seem to understand that a plucky band of unlikely companions should only happen when there are no other options and they HAVE to work together. As you say, a queen should be able to use every resource at her disposal. It was the same with the Kenobi series when a king and powerful senator decided that he could only ask Kenobi to recover her because, um, people might somehow find out that the child he has had since birth is the daughter of Skywalker?!?

[@quademasters249]

This. You use the whole army till only a gang of plucky characters are left.

[@Bhavyo]

Its brave to call them writers as they lack the absolute basic writing skills. Its so low level writing, it hardly qualifies.

[@lukebatchelor717]

the worst thing is that people will look at the willow series remake and say "Well, I guess sword and sorcery movies won't be successful, so let's not do anymore of that!", when it has nothing to do with the genre, but the writing

[@budgiecat9039]

nah Disney will try again one more time. They still got Dragonslayer in their archives lol Either that or theyll bring back the Black Hole

[@observationsfromthebunker9639]

@@budgiecat9039 May God forbid, on both of them.

[@randomdude189]

And the casting. These are clearly trying to cast people based entirely on looks instead of anything relevant. The rarity of a ginger black looking female is more important than acting to the caring agents. It’s sad.

[@fictiontheorizer1991]

Same as they did with comic books and westerns. The pattern repeats itself until there are no icons left to plunder.

[@KurtAngle89]

Nope, it's PRODUCERS that will make that conclusion. Wich is even worse

[@user-sb3wh3dd4v]

"Strong female character, ginger plank of wood, and a group of talent-less diversity hires..." PRICELESS! 🤣

[@jozsefizsak]

You watched four episodes? You are truly a man of steel and a worthy hero for the rest of us to admire.

[@phantomsights4533]

I was done after 2

[@RACEgale]

I was a teenager when he movie came out. My wife andI were excited for this show as we really enjoy the movie, even today. We turned it off 1/2 way through episode 2. It’s absolutely awful and pays no tribute to the original movie. This review is spot on.

[@blackieblack]

I loved it as a kid. I showed it to my kids and they liked it too. It's a fun, cute movie for kids. I wasn't going to bother with the modern interpretation, but now I'm REALLY not going to.

[@theblackflame4002]

Its another example of why not just make a new show instead of using nostalgia click bait to get people to check it out

[@iznon]

🤢

[@julianbentham3989]

I thought the original movie was mildly entertaining, not enough to have ever watched it again though. Thanks to the drinker I need never to watch this other than to annoy myself. Which I won't

[@G1R2TS]

That “Go away, now!!” Was said with true vigor.

[@rockargen9591]

i felt bad for Graydon throughout the show, he got dragged into danger, almost died, got posesed, got hated for being posesed, learned magic and was finally useful, then he immediatly "died" and they almost forgot about him 10 minutes later.

[@PorchBandit]

It's a medieval fantasy and they have a character named GRAYDON. that's all you need to know about the writers of this thing.

[@preston7960]

How about the old "mentor" guy who got killed almost straight away? He had supposedly been mentoring the kids since they were little and was very close to them, but after getting killed nobody gave a single fuck.

[@debbieandmarc]

I lost it at "beta male who uses safety scissors to open his bag of crisps." 🤣👏🏽

[@joe-zj8js]

I like the 2 redheads creating a ginger singularity that would destroy the universe comment...i lost it and almost wrecked

[@Lopyswine]

Me too

[@vfvs11a]

He actually did get some character growth and was kinda likeable by the end, but certainly didn't save the show.

[@CapnArrich]

That was a "Go away now" of canny rage. The original had charm in it's simplicity. I am convinced that Warwick Davis is aware of the assassination attempt, and was probably more worried if the check cleared. I recall the meet the cast he did like last year. The aura of contempt coming from him was palpable. And Willow can't use magic anymore? Really? They went and Jake Skywalker'd him? That's a load into itself.

[@dercooney]

@flashbang.. potato wedges? is this supposed to be humor or just some attempt at advertising?

[@zacharyhaverkamp]

@Sarko the Mad just bots lmao it replied to every comment practically

[@silverletter4551]

I never even heard of the original movie. The drinker is right. They really are sucking the bottom of the barrel

[@ronwatford7331]

I remember in that "meet the cast" how dumb everyone was and trying to make it funny, especially because the ginger plank of wood made it clear she'd never seen the original.

[@thedadwars]

@@silverletter4551 Did you grow up without electricity or something?

[@Virtualblueart]

I think "Willow" himself was exited when he was asked to reprise his role, but after getting the didsapointing script went into full "I'm just here for the money" mode.

[@demonsmoke1788]

I said the same thing lol When the show is called "Willow" and you are a side character to the show that's in your character's name... you know it's garbage.

[@Martyisruling]

Willow isn't worse than Rings of Power. I made it through Willow. I had to see how bad it was going to get. Also, i was really rooting for the villains in this one.

[@BlkRamGuy]

I think the reason Disney loves the ginger plank of wood because it hits all the demographics and genders all in one person. She is like their unicorn!

[@clintoruss153]

Albino looking

[@Rondo2ooo]

It's cheaper... controlling dpt. loves it

[@Rick-fc3kc]

They need to saw an arm off to attain “differently abled” status and then she’ll be perfection

[@petriew2018]

she's also probably cheap too, 'cuz i can't see anyone trying to outbid Disney for her services....

[@williamjpellas0314]

@@Rick-fc3kc Nah. For that she needs to be simultaneously autistic, homeless, an illegal immigrant, and covered in tats from head to toe. That's in addition to being multiracial and having no discernible talent.

[@KaiserInGilroy2K]

I liked how “strong female lesbian character” and the “ginger plank of wood” have this look of disdain on their faces after Willow was telling the fair-skinned blonde haired blue eyed serving girl would be the future ruler of the Willow realms.

[@melhawk1352]

I'm sure she's got a Scandinavian background - which puts her in the 'exotic white' diversity tick box 👍

[@sirpiken]

I don't know if the show explains it but it's fucking stupid for Elora Danon to not have been raised by Sorsha and Madmartigan since it's pretty heavily implied at the end of the film.

[@bones10145]

And the stupid thing is she's not supposed to be blond!

[@Baalur]

@@melhawk1352 'exotic white'? What are you talking about? Anti-Wokeism seems to be capable of rotting brains just as well as Wokeism itself. Scandinavian Nordics are the whitest people there are. None more white. Deal with it.

[@melhawk1352]

@@Baalur It's called 'irony'. Deal with it.

[@WarhavenSC]

Princess Kit seemed awfully confident that all she'll ever need for her trip are four arrows.

[@barbados3592]

she's a lesbian playing at being a man ruining a pro family story and surrounded by plot armor. it doesnt get more safe than that.

[@harlannguyen4048]

4 arrows that are from the modern day, that is.

[@richardott3706]

One for each gender.

[@ladyheavdev]

At least Hawkeye had eleven of them.

[@Petaurista13]

Well.. Lydia was at my side through whole TES V with only 1

[@lostkrusader4495]

"Ginger Singularity" - lmfao! And hey, you can't fault Warwick for his acting. He's ascended to the Hall of Fame after the Leprechaun franchise and so has earned the right to do anything he wants onscreen. He's like Bruce Campbell to us - he could show up on set high and drunk and belch through his lines and we'd still watch him. Plus he probably only came back for the same guilty feelings that brought Mark Hamill back to Star Wars. So I can't blame him for not caring, especially when the writing is this bad.

[@johnlawlessmusic]

I’m almost happy that Lucasfilm makes these horrors just for the entertainment of watching Drinker rip them to shreds

[@MegamanXfan21xx]

I can't wait until he reviews the next Indiana Jones, which TOTALLY won't erase Indy from time and have a woman retroactively take his place!

[@roninkraut6873]

Willow was one of my favorite movies as a kid. I’m sick of my childhood being retconned into garbage…

[@jailcatjones3250]

You and me both, but I feel it's still just the beginning

[@xSilentZeroXx]

Hey man. It ain't canon if you say it ain't canon.