Theo and Matt McCusker Tell Their Worst Break-Up Stories

Excerpt from This Past Weekend w/ Theo Von #504 | Matt McCusker
Full Episode: • Matt McCusker | This P...
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[@willhess8011]

“Wandering through your old life like a ghost” is an awesome line

[@eenotana3563]

💯

[@JamesGannon-iz7yh]

Fucking A. That's not a good idea

[@internziko]

These 2 dudes were born to podcast. Their standup is decent but their ability to sit around telling stories is legendary.

[@jasonotto9126]

Definitely. I find them just being them is so much better than their stand up.

[@liamrose.9]

@@jasonotto9126i agree. love theo especially but you can see he was meant to podcast. its not just that he’s funny, hes a great story teller with surprising insight

[@jasonotto9126]

@@liamrose.9 definitely. It took me a bit to get into him and Matt. But they have life experience and the more I listen the more I think I need to do this I got mad stories like them 😅

[@Kartman36]

@@jasonotto9126😊😊 you can see 😊

[@JasonWilliams-nq5sy]

@JasonWilliams-nq5sy 0 seconds ago I say this a lot-I don’t like Theo Von’s stand up, but his ability to pull silly analogies out otherwise of mundane conversation is where he gets me. He has a good variety of guests too. Happy for the dude.

[@tommyaudio]

"i can't be in reverse, i gotta wait till i'm in forward before i can cry"

[@byropesthrudirt]

Oddly profound

[@maxb9772]

theo is the best at saying these funny things that at first just sound like a random joke but are actually deep statements

[@cosmiccomedy7394]

That's a real gem right there

[@billyghostal]

1:27 one of my worst breakups ended with the girl leaving me a note on the counter saying "I want the Grill or the Dog, your choice". Both were completely mine, it was just a final stab. Anyway, dog stayed with me for another 16 years and we had amazing adventures. RIP Alex, you were a very ggrl

[@eagleboy2202iam]

she got the grill?

[@MrMan-fx3ow]

Why even entertain her saying that? Why not just take both any way?

[@RandomBogey]

RIP Alex? So you killed the ex and took the grill and the dog?

[@colin8477]

@@MrMan-fx3ow Because she would've been happy with that too, it would mean more fighting and arguing lol. He can buy a new grill.

[@Sky_Blaze]

Na f that..​@@colin8477

[@deanwinchester3249]

there chemistry together is so good lmao

[@Ervinabrahamian]

Their*

[@buckkylem]

“Obviously he’s in the wrong” 😂😂

[@DavidTWGoliath]

That SAE joke was crazy. 😂😂😂

[@imsaltylit3101]

😂 That description fits one of my cats lol, she gets so excited she ,as my son says, “fist bumps” …but it’s more like a run and full body bump , always reminds me of that stupid movie with Will Ferrell ( 🤢)

[@InvincibleMumu]

Theo’s metaphors are always a masterpiece after he explains it fully to you 😂

[@JaredFrye-j3n]

I was clean and sober for 3 years and relapsed. When she found my dope kit the second time after telling her I got clean I said I’ll leave and move out if you want me to. Totally expecting her to say no please stay. She didn’t. She said ya that’s probably for the best. Homeless shooting heroin in Denver for a year after. Never will forget that heartbreak. Heroin won again…and then again… clean two years with the best girl ever so no regrets

[@nataliaalfonso2662]

Thank God she kicked you out. Imagine how worthless and unlovable she’d be to herself for the rest of her life if she let you stay? And I hope to god for your sake and everyone’s if you relapse again the girl you’re with now kicks you out. Enabling users is no joke. It’s one of the greatest evils in the world.

[@RyanSemmel77]

@@nataliaalfonso2662damn you went for this response instead of a “good for you for getting clean. Keep it up buddy. I’m sure that was a really difficult time and I wish you the best”? Ruthless.

[@lindboknifeandtool]

@@nataliaalfonso2662like hating men is part of your personality. Watch men, they’re fucked inside out by women being heartless and they still come back. Men don’t hate women, men hate how all you women we interact with act. Power imbalance… like being able to ruin someone’s life with words forever. Christ you’re a person I fucking really dislike. Keep spreading toxicity.

[@damondriver6363]

@@RyanSemmel77 shes a woman. Modern women tend to be very cold and heartless

[@damondriver6363]

@@nataliaalfonso2662 yikes

[@djaniel4028]

“Straight dude crying, that’s a hot dude to a gay dude” 😂😂😂😂😂

[@JimNortonsAlcoholism]

1:10 Theo just went with Matt being handicapped lol

[@findlay1arches]

I picked up on that too n hilarious lol

[@Steveoclassic]

Lol stopped listening after the word handicapped 😂😂

[@joshprout1726]

“Oh yea” immediately

[@brotherbootlegger1777]

Im so happy Matt is starting to branch out and do his own thing and get recognition beyond just being the guy who does a podcast with Shane

[@suzanneblaylock9598]

''I wait 'til I'm in forward before I cry''. Brilliant.

[@lyndseygolden7546]

I’m from Arkansas and when I feel lonesome to the level of crazy I’ve gone through to get to adulthood I feel so much affection to how Theo tells the likeness of those stories of navigating the no whereness your life has to go to be in the south. I just feel like the fucked up teenager of my soul gets a hug in the story telling and really hope his career and life grow to be full of that kind of being seen and supported that he brings to the table by facing the bonkers of reality the way he does. ❤thank you for being the person you are. May your lovability return to land and support you in your life in multiples.

[@Geova-zb3ri]

This kind of cheers me up cuz I just am going through a divorce right now and I have also nothing but it's funny cuz we're not fighting over anything

[@s-rod4360]

Good luck to you buddy. I’ll be going throw a long term relationship break up soon.

[@TalkingThrones]

​@@s-rod4360 Break it off asap. Don't drag this out any longer. You both already know it's over. It sucks, but it's necessary.

[@Poolooskoo]

Hard times hitting a few of us it seems bringing a few dawgz to these videos. Look after yourselves boys we gonna make it

[@brando2118]

Matt lost his only possession in the divorce, a huge flatscreen screen tv

[@tonycruz9026]

“SAE” 😂😂😂😂

[@newmanifest]

Some people didn’t even believe in Arizona.

[@ErrolCodling]

????

[@newmanifest]

@@ErrolCodling Theo said that

[@Joshua-mv5zp]

Matt’s legit man.

[@anthonyalexander6266]

Just left my Highschool Sweetheart of 10 years. A friend said I'm wearing it well andthat was all the uplifting I need for the month.

[@Steven-kc7id]

It will be hard for a while but you will be okay brother

[@michaellk2254]

The fuck yeah is hilarious after hearing Matt had nothing.

[@minnesotatomcat]

The engine coolant system has nothing to do with the air vents, dumping water in the air vents isn’t doing anything 🤣

[@Hoss-]

How casually Matt says: “yeah, I’ve tried that too” 😂

[@minnesotatomcat]

@@Hoss- right🤣 fuckin city people

[@nooneyouknow699]

​@minnesotatomcat do you think city people dont drive cars? Matts not even from a city, neither is theo lol. Dumb people come from all over, just look at you

[@nooneyouknow699]

Its theo von why tf you take it seriosuly

[@chairlife7187]

"i'LL WAIT UNTILL IM IN FORWARD BEFORE I CRY"! YEAH!

[@benmckinstry4023]

Bruh so many bots in the comments. YT needs to sort this shit out.

[@sambarrett867]

Seems like there's more bots than real people on the internet nowadays

[@juanbait9670]

​@@sambarrett867 dead internet theory, its mainly bots , ai, and npc humans.

[@yayo4nasal]

How you think you get viewer / sub counts up?

[@juanbait9670]

@@yayo4nasal produce decent content, not fake your way with bots.

[@nosequiters]

@@sambarrett867 dead internet theory

[@HUSHMONEYBAND]

3:56 hahaha I lost it

[@BrendaTheeSolarGirl]

🤣🤣🤣🤣🗺️

[@PhilipSportel]

He's a poet in a bro's body.

[@levikeller7916]

5:52 who thinks that? lol 😅

[@Steven-kc7id]

3:59 I busted out laughing, never heard that one before 💀💀💀😂😂😂

[@FarlessBlue]

This is such a great clip.

[@SzeridaKowanda]

I plan to retire at the end of 2025 at 62 after 36 years in Telecom as a sales engineer. My wife will retire in May 2026 and she's loving life! But walking away from a good income stream and building the nest egg to living from the nest egg is a scary proposition couple with the alarming recession and CPI report

[@VanceHorsford]

I feel your pain mate, as a fellow retiree, I'd suggest you look into passive index fund investing and learn some more. For me, I had my share of ups and downs when I first started looking for a consistent passive income so I hired an expert advisor for aid, and following her advice, I poured $30k in value stocks and digital assets, Up to 200k so far and pretty sure I'm ready for whatever comes.

[@SueliPavlenko]

My advice: for newbies to grow financially this year, invest. Saving is good, but investing elevates your finances. Why newbie make huge losses on trade is because investing without proper guidance can lead to mistakes and losses. that will stop you from trading, this has been one of the biggest problem to new traders, I've learned this from my own experience

[@VanceHorsford]

Tracy Britt Cool Consulting was my hope during the 'bear summer' last year. I made so many mistakes but also learned so much from it, and of course from Tracy.

[@CovaciFiletti]

I'm surprised that this name is being mentioned here, I stumbled upon one of her clients testimonies on CNBC news last week...

[@CovaciFiletti]

I keep hearing a lot about Mis. Tracy Britt Cool Consulting O'Reilly, she must be really good

[@applejacks8160]

Much appreciated for the clip of clips🎉🎉🧚🏿‍♂️🤌👏🤯

[@lilsleepy1485]

i just wish i could let theo know he's the man because i've never met anyone like me and i see myself in him so thank you theo

[@powsno4485]

'Like a bird mom' 😂

[@DUNEATV]

Divorce is devastating and few are happier afterwards

[@jonvia]

Divorces are hardest on the pets.

[@hjhorn11]

Kids?

[@peterlombardo4301]

My wife and I got into a fight and she went to sleep in the guest bedroom that night. The dog was going from room to room. She was panting and refused to drink or eat. We could tell she didn’t understand it and was actually depressed. But the comment above me is 100% right, what about the kids? 😂 This is just a dog. Haha

[@aboveaverageMidG]

especially for hamsters and guinea pigs

[@alexlazerboy8354]

@@aboveaverageMidGThem shits already fighting suicidal urges all day, no need to give em another reason fr

[@garrisdom]

Not the dog being a sig ep member 😂

[@ballin6987]

Phi alpha Theo lol

[@chriskozub8012]

lol the map joke

[@Patrick.Weightman]

This was such a good ep

[@billbillson3129]

Thanks for the laughs!

[@NickWixx]

Love of my life left for Study abroad To Australia then I left to Navy Bootcamp. Before she returned I had been shipped out to Africa for 8 months. I never saw her again. She recently married. It’s been 10 years, She doesn’t look amazing but I still love her. But she moved into an 800k home so I guess she made the right choice.

[@CarolODonovan-f9h]

😂😂😂😂😂Have to be in fourth gear before i cry....Hello from Cork City Ireland.

[@davidkelly189]

Cork biy!

[@Humblemumble7]

I want to see a movie written by these 2. It would be better if it wasn't a straight-up comedy as well. Some crazy unexpected shit like 2 Civil War mercenaries from opposing sides that escaped from the same burnt down, makeshift military prison as the only sole survivors.

[@johnnash1119]

The Shaman & The Rat would be a great regular podcast

[@watcher1326]

Funny how much that intense heartache can weaken you.

[@Hausse109]

Hearing shit like this is crazy! You didn't understand the depth of human emotions until you were married then divorced!?

[@gazer99]

He was in his twenties. A lot of people now are emotionally stunted around that time unfortunately and it takes a really big life event to get them to get their shit together. Life and priorities are very different when you’re only living for yourself

[@danniamendoza9260]

Right.

[@xavierreivax9932]

been through it, there is usually music associated with the break up i have songs from 1987 takes me back to that break up for me, it's another part of me michael jackson

[@RandomBogey]

The uneven spacing of the sound dampening tiles is killing me

[@christopherfoy6668]

Are they th0? I mean I'm really looking They seem evenly spaced

[@Neo-cu1qb]

You're a loser

[@famerhacker]

take your meds freak. who even cares about that stuff

[@Katy-se2fn]

Thanks for bringing up dating without intention. One of the worst parts of dating haha

[@rabbittrance]

the SHAMAN BECKONS

[@nicknormando4220]

These bots lol

[@nicklohry9284]

Dumping fluid down the vents is WILD

[@samwayne5765]

We had a dog together? How

[@chuckleberryfinn1992]

doggie style.

[@cdrumz]

I think it’s interesting to point out that this man openly is pretty much saying “ I’m selfish and I don’t want to be responsible for anyone and I never grew out of being a fuck boy”.

[@JimNortonsAlcoholism]

These bot comments are insane

[@Lebowski333]

How do you spot one

[@peterkovic2241]

Unstoppable Force, meet Immovable Object!

[@duckera-4444]

The Shaman

[@SneakyG59]

straight deja vu lol. Or is this an older podcast? I've heard theo tell that gf story about the mom in the chair VERBATIM before, word inflection and word choices and all lol. Not saying the dude can't tell the same story twice, but wow that was like a rehearsed bit ☠

[@GunMarsh1105]

I relate to how Theo wants to hear every detail. How were you crying, where?

[@ShadowT23]

They're so similar hahaha

[@wacksparrow88]

Ya I can’t relate, I did all the fun stuff already

[@AndreMiller8889]

Watching Podcast With The sound off with my uncle who is a ghost but he’s a real person always most of the time in reality

[@chrisw3421]

This was so funny...but wtf, how many words are we not allowed to say or hear anymore? This is ridiculous, the creeping real censorship, its antithetical to comedy.

[@user-hu9sw5zf8j]

Bro basically ran away from a good woman and life because of responsibility

[@juice_alv]

Nah fr 🤣

[@robfreeman5783]

Mind blowing that the actual F bomb in these episodes is not censored, yet the 3 letter f** word is bleeped.

[@Zombiphobia]

fuck has lost its fuckin punch, the future is now old man

[@rednezke7646]

These 2

[@gabehorn52]

Isn't Matt the guy that said he wants to see kids with no tops on at the beach?

[@lydiaann5261]

💙💙

[@samwayne5765]

Get a new dag

[@whocares8662]

At the end i blew on my screen cause i thought it was dirty

[@samwayne5765]

Dags ain’t kids

[@tonydehaven4557]

😂😂

[@jeffyboyreloaded]

sae

[@highriseeeee]

never clicked so fast

[@saidwhowhy]

what the fuck did just watch?

[@Daniel-qx7dy]

Matt tries to sound like Shane all the time

[@JohnnySack16]

FIRST COMMENT LIKE MY WANG CHUNG SUN GOOOON. I’ll watch your whole family eat dinner.

[@yeahdude7184]

I've never had a really sad break up. I've always been so relieved to go. I would also accidentally develope a girlfriend and spend up to 5 years like "fuck"