Trauma Specialist: Do This to Release Your Trauma’s Negative Energy & Rediscover Yourself!

[@lewishowes]

Thanks to Dr. Frank Anderson for sharing his wisdom with us! Leave a “YES” if you enjoyed this and share the biggest moment for you. And make sure to subscribe to never miss out on inspiring content like this again KZbin.com/lewishowes

[@jeffconley819]

I’m 60 plus and mostly been messed up my whole life. A childhood with a abusive mother and a father that looked the other way. I’m at the end of my life so what’s the point of trying to get straightened out. It seems pointless this late in life .

[@franhart7414]

​@@jeffconley819Everyone carries some sort of trauma. You're 60 so you could be here on this beautiful planet for another 30 or 35 years. Do your best to raise your awareness and learn how to be happier. Millions have and so can you. Just open the door/s. Enjoy your life

[@petrakreuzwieser3408]

❤

[@petrakreuzwieser3408]

​@@jeffconley819 If it's for the last five minutes in your life, that you can feel the love inside of you, it wont be too late... it's never too late. ❤

[@gemi9i1]

Yes a thousand x’s! Related so much to Frank & his experience with his parents & have been drawn to your @lewishowes journey as well. Ty so much for addressing more than one topic & especially discussions regarding mental fitness, how were affected by the past (esp in childhood & traumas). One of the Best & my empathy grows from this beautiful conversation. Thank you sincerely Dr. Frank & Lewis. 🙏♥️🔥

[@elainec5333]

The Four T’s to Trauma Healing 1. Thank your trauma responses. Thank your protective responses. Thank drinking. Thank binge eating. Thank suicidal thinking. Thank the depression and anxiety. Thank your responses bc they’re just trying to stop the pain. 2. Trust that you have what you need inside to heal. Don’t need a guru. Trust your gut. Trust your intuition. 3. Transform. What doesn’t serve you doesn’t belong to you. Witness experience and share the story, thoughts, feelings and physical sensations. Share whole experience without reliving it but be with it but not in it. Disconfirm the trauma. I’m loved. I’m seen. I’m important. Relational repair. I love myself. A friend loves and cares about you. Can love the other person who harmed you. Corrective experience after share. Release is possible. Body shakes. Feel lighter. Energy releases. Pain dissipates. You become you again. It’s freeing to let go of trauma. Reclaiming yourself. 4. Take back your power. Become you. You’re more you every time you release something. I can love and move on despite… Forgiveness is not condoning. If you choose to it’s more for you but you don’t have to. Who hasn’t harmed or been harmed? Forgive self. Trauma blocks love. Love heals trauma.

[@gab31282]

Thank you for taking the time to summarize it. Very much appreciated.

[@tanyabaughn3639]

Facts☮️💟✝️🦋 thank you!

[@ambergibson7381]

Great Summary❤️‍🔥Thank You!!

[@brigittegeorg]

Thanks cos I really don't like this guy.

[@lilyb7504]

Thank you for noting points. ❤

[@IamCoachCourt]

“You don’t need gurus, you know what’s best for yourself!” This is the absolute best

[@kathylibby3676]

So my cousin thinks she has her family dynamics figured out without counselling. Dubious. None of her 7 siblings agree with her conclusions.

[@IamCoachCourt]

@@kathylibby3676 I mean, clearly if there is some sort of psychosis going on it’s obvious. I think he was referring to the other people.

[@oambitiousone7100]

What if your gut is telling you to do something wrong, like leave your spouse for someone else? As in, screaming that THIS is what you need? The gut is fickle.

[@CALredhead]

@@oambitiousone7100Until we get good help - counseling, meditation, etc - it's pretty hard to know whether it's our 'gut' talking to us or just the part of our self that we constructed & learned to listen to in order to get along in the world we exist in.

[@parkerwhanau8340]

@@oambitiousone7100 sounds like your body trying to protect you by giving you an escape from your current situation. Not the solution! It’s a quick fix. The inner work needs to be done first.

[@lauragoodman3378]

Thank you. I've been on a healing journey most of my adult life. The last few months were dark, I was in my head in a negative way. I remembered a skill given to me during counseling. I needed to go back and rescue me from my trauma, and love me and tell me I am safe and loved and whatever else that me needed to know. So I started to do this with every trauma I could remember. I thanked me for the trauma response because it protected me, and told me I didn't need it anymore. Oh and a whole lot more. A week ago I looked in the mirror, smiled at me and felt peace, and I felt me, for the first time. I looked at me and loved me, I am 61, and proud of me. Then I found this podcast, and you supported me and gave me more guidance. Thank you.

[@lewishowes]

You are loved 🙏👏

[@annaak7849]

❤❤

[@pimmspimms5462]

This is so, so beautiful. I have a diagnosis of Complex PTSD as a consequence of childhood abuse. I’m in therapy - my psychologist is using the Internal Family Systems modality on me - and have begun to talk to my younger, traumatised parts. There’s something magical in rediscovering your inner child. There’s something magical in loving your inner child in all of the ways that your parents didn’t. I hope that, one day, I will reach a place of peace for everything that I’ve been through, pride for surviving… and then let the trauma go from my body, mind and emotions. You’re inspirational to me! You make me want to keep going. Continue to love and look after yourself always, 🕊️ x

[@dianemorrell9638]

​@@lewishowes but I'm not and know it.

[@Jupefires]

Also the caregivers we had that failed us did what they knew how to do. People can’t give what they don’t have to give just as we didn’t and couldn’t. On the side of psychopaths this is a fallen world with fallen people. Others actions toward us do not dictate who we are or determine our intrinsic value.

[@sharang747]

Your nervous system IS the "master key." It impacts everything... Your cells, your blood vessels, your immune system, your endocrine system, your muscular system, your digestive system, your brain and signaling pathways... EVERYTHING! But most of us are still ignoring it.

[@letakeokuk5446]

Not sure how to fix nervous system except through diet and exercise

[@l2sunshine173]

Whenever a negative emotion triggered by trauma takes over my body, I stop and i talk to it" I hear you, i aknowledge you but i don't need you today. You are from the past and it is ok to leave.We are safe now". I then sit and feel where it is in my body, breath, and feel it leaving my body. I am no longer trying to carriy it around.

[@patriciaberliner8050]

Thank you ❤

[@tls2626]

I love this ❤

[@TS-iv9ml]

❤ wow!! This is great and doable!! TY!!

[@alhana8293]

Wow. This is beautiful Thank you. This was so ppwerful had to screenshot your comment and save it to my journaling app. I believe this will help me get back on track I have been spiraling put of control for a while. THANKS ❤

[@SummerLove-u2o]

I'm sorry to say that you are further exiling your exiles when you say you are in the past and shut them down. Because they are still stuck in that moment of time when they got burdened with that pain & they want to be heard and freed. If you unburden the pain of the exiles you'll never get triggered. Try IFS. It is the most magical non-pathologizing model. I believe everyone needs to learn ifs. Much love ❤

[@mindbodymedicine]

A psychiatrist who doesn't push drugs and is relatable. I admire him and I loved this podcast. Dr. Anderson, thank you for your dedication to help those with trauma. I have the utmost respect for you.

[@roseofsharon7551]

AND he doesn’t suggest no-contact as a healing option. Supposedly 20% of youth today are going no-contact; it’s insidious that so much of the mental health industry is promoting the break up of families.

[@tinydanceryoutube]

And Lewis too!

[@tinydanceryoutube]

​@@roseofsharon7551read his story. He divorced his family to find himself years ago. That's why he is who he is today.

[@suziebee4240]

​@roseofsharon7551 you simply cannot heal trauma if youre in it. Some people see no wrong in their ways, and will never change, accept you, or even try to learn about you. Some people are incapable. No therapist has suggested to me to go no contact with my mom. That was a choice I made for myself.

[@judymatos3149]

@@suziebee4240I’m not opposed to you distancing yourself as part of your own healing. I would like to offer that our healing is not about the other changing or even understanding. It’s about acceptance and standing in your truth and honoring and respecting yourself enough to do that. We set boundaries because we don’t have to tolerate toxic behavior. I have difficult relationships with my mother that has affected every aspect of my life. Mother wound healing is helping dive deep into all of it.

[@oaktreedialogues6318]

"You don't have to carry stuff that isn't yours". This idea of trauma as holding somebody else's negative energy resonates with me. It makes sense for trauma as a relational injury.

[@damarisamaya5142]

I think part of that is bc we feel guilty for any reason, for me guilt has make carry that energy that doesn’t belong to me

[@Stacy-s1s]

"Awareness does nothing for healing when it comes to trauma because it's still in you and comes out of you." Now i don't feel like a failure when I get blindsided & overreact. Now I believe healing is actually possible. Thank you for giving me that hope -- it's been 62 years in coming.

[@richardscathouse]

I lost hope years ago.

[@noriwilliams4637]

All in the now

[@jimd4609]

62 years! Me its been 21 years, but in all honesty, we're intuitionlized by now. But I'm trying to heal now.

[@ziondaughter4399]

I feel the same way. Thank you for putting my feelings into words❤

[@Havely777]

Every step is a step to be proud of yourself for and to be acknowledged and celebrated. 🤟

[@dianeclayton4936]

I talk to my parts in the car all the time. I don't need to close eyes or meditate. I talk to my inner parts just as I would a close friend. ❤

[@austintaylor55]

Same :) IFS has helped give language and framework for facilitating the parts work

[@JDr709]

I’m love you and you’re energy! You need to take a step forward for someone else or yourself maybe. You’re on the next level brother(or sister). Pay it forward.

[@MsTee2]

Omg me too!

[@allisontaylor1818]

Your inner child , such an important part of you.

[@tanyabaughn3639]

Me too😂🤣😂

[@shinewithheart]

Wow. I'm not even 20 min in and this is powerful. Your mom apologized for not protecting you. That is what I wish I could hear.

[@chriestinenpape]

When you think you could never have had any more deep, thoughtful healing podcast from Lewis and his guest.... I love his podcast more and more

[@lewishowes]

Thank you! Appreciate you and your support🧡

[@Hooch737]

You Are NOT wrong!!!! So right, always a good discussion

[@magdalenanarolewska4934]

What an amazing discussion. Thank you ❤❤

[@TS-iv9ml]

Love the AND teaching moment ❤ I needed to hear that as I'm finally at a place & understanding to do this! As an Empath, it takes so much energy & time to get here. You two are perfectly placed and timed for so many of us, thank you so very much!! The healing and holding...boundaries.. perfect!! It's okay to do for you & NEEDED ... Craniosacral Therapy is helping where my disconnect is so I can heal 🫂

[@bernieotoole8905]

Tears of joy, ah ha moments, OMG's, ... I have been healing from Trauma (C-PTSD) and this is the most illuminating interview on the subject. It's incredibly powerful and I'll listen again and again. I know I found "my tribe" in people with trauma. Huge respect and admiration to all of us here. Lewis and Frank - you are both doing incredibly important work. Love and appreciation to you both and all the viewers.

[@lewishowes]

Appreciate your support. Thank you for watching! 🧡

[@kathylibby3676]

Generally speaking people who face their life trauma will get better. Those who don't choose to go on a personal quest will become bitter. Choosing to become better rather than bitter has served me well. And I'm still working on getting better.

[@megankwisdom]

💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯

[@TheBams1026]

One of THE best interviews I have ever listened to. No doubt this came across my feed for a reason.

[@lewishowes]

Thank you so much for your feedback 🙂

[@kyststudio-epicartadventure]

We don’t tell or read these stories to expose anyone, we read or tell because so many NEED this information.

[@elainec5333]

He’s genuine and doesn’t hold back on what’s important and helpful. He whole heartedly cares and wants to help. You can feel it.

[@allisontaylor1818]

Still working on this journey called life... i hit rock bottom 3 years ago and have had therapy since...so many feelings I kept inside, no boundaries, door mat,abuse, yelled at my kids, alcoholic parent , alcoholic myself...etc. Boy , have I come a long way since then. Learned alot of great things about myself.

[@pimmspimms5462]

You CAN do this, Allison. There will be low and hard times along the therapy route, but everything will be worth it. I grew up with an alcoholic father and know the deep pain that it causes. By healing your addiction, you are giving an extraordinary gift to yourself and your future… and, in turn, your children. Keep going! I’m sending love to you, 🕊️ x

[@allisontaylor1818]

@@pimmspimms5462 thank you so so much...i feel the love as I weep.

[@Dawn-tv1bk]

Pleasing others is really a protection of self.

[@SethNobrega]

Would you elaborate on? That’s an interesting take and I’m legitimately curious? Thank you!

[@godzillamanstreb524]

Yes protection from further abuse …..you try to please your abuser…..iow….fawning

[@SethNobrega]

Wow that’s amazing. I never knew that term before but considering the last two (psychologically/physically abusive) relationships I left, dots are starting to connect 🤦‍♂️

[@Dawn-tv1bk]

@@SethNobrega I’m saying that pleasing others is really a protection of self because at its core we don’t please others simply to make them happy. We sometimes please others to make them happy so they will be happy with us and think highly of us and like us. Can someone please someone else simply from a pure heart to make them happy because they love them and care for them, yes. But people who are chronic people pleasers often do it to protect themselves from the pain of not being liked or they want to be seen as this amazing good person. I speak from experience as a recovering people pleaser🥰😊

[@Dawn-tv1bk]

@@godzillamanstreb524pleasing someone to prevent abuse is called survival. I actually don’t call that people pleasing. It’s survival until you can get away🙏🏼❤️

[@infinitewavesofhealing]

I just can't believe he's 60! He looks amazing! Healing really does wonders.

[@evka24]

Wow

[@CatLadyKorea]

What?????? He is?????

[@infinitewavesofhealing]

@@CatLadyKorea Lol, Yes! He said it a couple times in the interview and I was in disbelief every time.

[@irenesze3099]

Make up la 😂

[@infinitewavesofhealing]

@frankanderson8507 You are so very welcome! And thank you for sharing your story and helping others to heal with your energy and expertise!

[@DianeO-369]

I totally agree ... we are all coming together ... a collective whole! ❤❤❤❤❤

[@annanims7876]

When Dr. ANDERSON said to his mom, "I have been living my whole life for you, and now I am choosing me!" That took reflection and courage! I have the reflection, now I need the courage!!!

[@kathryngganderson8636]

No that just makes you the spider. Hurting your mom should not make you feel better. Grow up.

[@Sonia-y6x8n]

It’s actually not about hurting your mom. And I would say look at the two paths. The one you’re on and the one where you get to evolve and step out of the familiar (family = familiar) and it’s not easy. Relationships are a two way street. So it’s not about being separated from yourself. If you lose those you love by being yourself then who are they actually loving? The real you or the projection of you? Did you actually “have” them in the first place? You don’t lose them when they’re not beside you unconditionally. It’s about open and honest communication. And in kindness. No blame. No yelling. Just compassion and empathy for where they’re coming from. And asking for the same. Asking for help. Do Ho’oponpono or gratitude for your resilience. Hurting your mom comes when you’re not coming from your authentic self - a loving relationship comes from being yourself and not lying to others by wearing a mask ❤

[@Claiire-vn5rh]

I paused the vidéo several times to cry... but you know what? That was really good. Yep, really good. Just wanna Thank you ❤

[@tanyacarlyle1422]

Me too 😢 hugs

[@twylabryant7197]

Sometimes it’s not just protective. It’s necessary to distance yourself from family members for sure. When you’ve tried everything but the pain they keep inflicting on you doesn’t stop you have to have a healthy boundary. You do not have to stay in those situation’s and there’s nothing wrong with you when you need to do that.

[@michellemonet4358]

Yes. Some people stay in a family system out of obligation even if it detrimental to their health.

[@marshareed1438]

I have CPTSD. I’ve done everything possible to get rid of the trauma. Then I turned 50 and I got traumatized! I couldn’t bounce out of it! I decided that I had to get away from the toxic person in my life. I took a self sabotaging path but it worked. I got better than divorced. Now I’m working out again & I’m dreaming of my next journey on a continuous basis!

[@lraejo]

wow. The part where he talks about not getting “ jump startled” anymore because he released it- the same goes for the negative self talk! It’s like when you practice self love, the negative thoughts don’t have as much access anymore. They just don’t over power anymore!

[@chevvalah1085]

Yes. I found that i have trauma that i kept trying to tell people about. Nobody understood so i would just shut down and panic more. But i started recording myself telling the story and ranting, and i would go back and give myself advice, because now that the emotions are out, i can tap into the inner wisdom and actually work on fixing

[@cherylm5002]

You are not alone, it does get better once we get the sh*t out❤

[@daott2213]

As parents we give our kids what we thought we needed to be happy and because we haven’t healed we feel resentment, overwhelmed, impatient, etc when they don’t behave as we want. The only way to teach a child to be emotionally healthy is to model it. Empower them and their self worth. You can only do that if you yourself are empowered and know and feel your worthiness.

[@mosis3287]

Love them Love you

[@NixTheNarcissist]

The problem with this is with complex trauma and dealing with narcissistic abuse is that loving them doesn’t work. It’s the opposite of helpful. Love isn’t the answer with them. Yes you can love yourself but loving them only In turn hurts you more in the long run.

[@crystalburkhardt]

Agreed! This is my experience with the narc in my life

[@elainec5333]

I wouldn’t even give a narcissist a wedge bc that’s too much attention than they deserve.

[@oaktreedialogues6318]

With narcissists, the idea is to love them from far away. You need to detach from them since hating them uses too much emotional energy. Detach, then look at them from a new perspective of universal love , without expecting anything from them.

[@MayaRoseSpokenWord]

My advice is love them from a far for your healing and let your inner child hate them with you... I hope this makes sense. It is the hardest healing because as Dr Ramni said, or maybe it was Lisa A Romano, that we are hard wired to love them and a part of us always will so I think it's best to surrender to the love of their sad story and the pain that caused them do what they do while honoring the anger and hatred in a sacred space that has nothing to do with your interaction with them.. good luck it's not easy to find the love but when you do it is so freeing and that doesn't mean you ever need to set eyes om them again. Good luck and much love to you❣️❣️❣️

[@michellemonet4358]

@frankanderson8507 yes but going No Contact is sometimes the only way. Ive tried to have a relationship with my 90 yr old mom. (Wrote her.5 non accusatory letters) She.still doesnt get me or why I feel the way I do. I chose to be at peace by finally deciding to stay away permanrently. I do feel empathy fir her. Not sure about forgiveness, but I feel much lighter and freer.

[@stevec404]

I had been silently screaming inside for about 50 years...then nervous breakdown #1 occurred. Healing began then, as well. Decades later, and I am still learning how to get past childhood psychological trauma. The sorrow I bear for a lost life is indescribable, yet receding as current efforts reshape a once destroyed sense of self.

[@Areyouanarcissist]

Me too

[@ToshanaHR]

Me too

[@miu9780]

Thank you, Dr. Frank Anderson. I finally understand the root issue. I chose my mother's decisions over my own choices and dreams. When I was in junior high, I wanted to be a nurse, but she objected. I'm over 50 now, and I still regret the big mistake of sacrificing myself to please her.

[@terrahillman151]

I agree with Frank about releasing trauma makes us look younger. Stress energy and trauma energy age humans. And makes us sick. There is no illness in healed humans. Only love and complete health. And youth. 🙌🏼❤️

[@Wakinguphumanity]

100% accurate ❤️

[@irinadumitru9088]

​@@WakinguphumanityThat s true...Fortunately I m looking younger due to a lot of healing traumas but I m still not done ...

[@lewishowes]

🧡

[@jacqueline2257]

💯

[@SheilaDavis-nu4je]

Maybe that's why I feel like I look so much older than I think I should! ESPECIALLY after I ALWAYS looked younger than I was; people always commented that I looked as much as 5 to 10 years younger up into my late 30's. But that was before being married to 2 abusive husbands, the first of which abused my 3 sons too, which I had an 11 year battle trying to get it to end, before I was able to finally get the support I needed to get away. I'm now 69, and on the inside my spirit feels like I'm still about 38 WHEN I'M NOT DEPRESSED, but on the outside, I FEEL like I've aged 20 years more than I should have! 😩

[@litalooloo4470]

As a random lady, I'm so proud of these two men. They are putting in the work to heal themselves. Thank you for all you are doing to help others on this path. Hugs to you both!

[@middleofnowhere1313]

I'm with Dr. Ramani. My forgiveness must be earned. It is not a door prize for the undeserving. Love myself when they didn't, yes i do. Those who deliberately made my life awful deserve and get nothing from me.

[@autygris1]

Haven’t watched this, was wondering if this goes against what Dr. Ramani says?

[@HumanityRisingNow]

Sounds like you still need to heal my brother/sister 🙏

[@northofyou33]

@frankanderson8507 Very true. My malignantly narcissistic mother abused me badly, but I am in the process of forgiving her. Not for what she did to me, but for the fact that she was a damaged person who had no idea what she was doing to me. I haven't fully forgiven her, but things are shifting, and I feel so much better about myself already. I'm doing it to empower myself.

[@jcepri]

@@northofyou33 My parents are both deceased. I'm working on pretending they were enlightened when they passed to the other wide and want to reach out to forgive me. It's up to me to accept their apology so I can forgive them.

[@punyashloka4946]

​@@hellothere98765no not for everyone.

[@leslietylersmith430]

Awesome information. At 71, am still trying to breakfree of residual trauma conditioning. This is so valuable & I so appreciate both of you for sharing this with us all!❤❤❤

[@jaydwegley]

They mentioned antidepressants & I 100% agree. When i started taking antidepressants, anti anxiety medication the light outdoors was actually brighter & i felt lighter. I stayed on for a few months & then decided to discontinue & through that i felt like i was able to learn for the first time in my life what happiness felt like & now i am able to tap into that feeling daily & i haven’t relapsed into chronic depression or chronic anxiety since. I hope this helps someone! ❤️ When i started i was devastated thinking i would have to be on the medication forever & for me, that was not the case & i believe that could be the same for many others.

[@florianewu1886]

Exactly, when a parent realizes that their triggered trauma self wounded their children, it feels like a moral injury. The shame needs to be healed also. I am also a Repairer. Wholeness is when we have re-integrated and self parented all the parts of ourselves. Ty for such an insightful interview! :)

[@sandyokeeffe2203]

Frank Anderson is a huge leading voice in the trauma treatment field. I appreciate him so much for all his beautiful work. He is truly amazing

[@magicalpatterns]

FINALLY SOMEONE speak about IFS internal family systems. Thank you 🙏🏼 is the absolute best therapy for trauma. Not only because is so extremely effective but because the therapist’s goal is to teach how to do it to yourself and let you go. Brilliant work discovered by Dr. Richard Schwartz

[@8Freakish8]

Since our brains have multiple personalities and thats why its same effective as literally giving therapy to a whole family. I think if we simply pay attention to the nervous and limbic system and its different states, we already refer to the "child" behavior while in survival for example. Gabor Mate talks since years about IFS and generational traumas. Mister bessel didnt even know what ifs was, said gabor shocked in a interview i watched lately. Yup yup there is still work to be done so the more awareness we cab spread to the world, the better 🌱😊

[@DianeO-369]

Thank you for the IFS ... Internal Family Systems 🙏🏼

[@claudiagomezlopez4852]

His honesty is refreshing What a great episode ❤

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@Phulosophy369]

By understanding his parents’ person’s life, he begins to understand why things happened and what he experienced. And from there he can act in a loving way. I did that with my dad. I did not know the horrific trauma he experienced as a 8 yo and teenager for so long. I forgave him and let him know that I love him no matter what. I could see the release in his eyes.

[@fayetriantis3341]

This has been one of the best interviews I have seen.

[@lewishowes]

🙌

[@ccpout-f1e]

Listening to and watching this video during my healing journey makes me feel less lonely. Thank you

[@J888-h7j]

I really appreciate people that have done the work within themselves to be able to dig out their true authentic self cause its only then that you can truly help others also dig themselves out of their trauma filled hard shell. Thank you both for what you'll do! 💙

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching! 🧡

[@warrenisaac5634]

This is an episode that everyone should see, if not for themselves then for those they love! There is plenty for everyone to take away from this episode! I will rewatch this one again and again. You provide so much healing for those that follow you and I for one am greatful. Bless you Lewis and Frank!

[@carolafriesen904]

I was a y care taker of my parents.My mom was prescription drug addict.My dad just worked all the time.Had to take care of my siblings.Unlike other people I no longer wanted to take care of people when I got older.

[@vickibazter3446]

So sorry about that burden. 😞 I hope you can parent yourself or find nurturing to feel safe. It's seems unfair.

[@patriciaberliner8050]

Thank you for your enlightening contribution. I felt I had to protect and defend my mother from my father throughout my childhood and on into adulthood. This could have had a significant influence on my choosing not to have children.

[@janswimwild]

Compassion fatigue is very real. You need your compassion now, and that’s ok. Take great care of yourself, you are worth it.

[@pimmspimms5462]

I’m sorry that you didn’t have the childhood that all little children deserve. It’s time to give to yourself now. Pour into yourself. Do what restores and replenishes YOU. It’s time, it’s time, it’s time. I hope that your future brings healing and peace, 🕊️ x

[@abstract20]

“Trauma blocks love. Love heals trauma.” Sounds like quite the conundrum to me.

[@pupplylove3003]

It is. That’s why it’s so hard to do

[@anthonycavallero6637]

Paper . ✂️.🪨..

[@malemaline]

True, I believe part of it is developing self-love and compassion toward yourself.

[@vickibazter3446]

@@pupplylove3003 good point. I believe we store our trauma memory in our body. I think body and breath work far surpass talk therapy to deal and break patterns. Not Easy.

[@tinydanceryoutube]

Lol. Right? But learning to love me which took 50 years by the way was the key that opened my heart so it could heal.

[@EpicLoveInstitute]

The chemistry and attunement between the two of you is off the charts!!! How you just "felt" each other was priceless. Such an amazing interview. Frank is one of my IFS heroes!

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@lesliemorgan3091]

This is the best explanation of dealing with trauma I've ever heard. Thank you guys!

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@clarisamompremier8005]

I loved this interview. I have not heard another guest refer/defer to other experts as much, it was so refreshing!! I also loved all the experts he was referring to..Brene Brown, Dr. Shefali..Dr. Becky..Dr. Dick S.... etc....

[@lorrainedevlin6409]

On the last day I want to spend it with a person who really loved me,appreciated me and will make that day one of the best in my life,that way I would die happy knowing that person deserved to be with me on that day.

[@gailyhanna510]

Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.💜

[@BeNice524]

I feel your spirit doing this interview Lewis. Stay strong brother 🙏🏼

[@MyOwnSweetHome]

Kids totally know correct behavior. At 10yrs, I remember a trip to Europe with my mom, watching her not being nice to the “help”. My daughter at 10yrs said to me, “I don’t like the way your mom speaks to you.” Ugh!

[@nikkawilliams8547]

This was so me. I held resentment, hatred, anger against my dad for 20 years. Glad that I finally let go of hurt and bad memories caused by him. I love my dad so much and I forgive him.

[@EcomCarl]

Dr. Frank insights on releasing negative energy from trauma are truly transformative. 💫 Understanding the role of shame and embracing the journey of healing can empower us to live more fulfilling and authentic lives.

[@KotobukiGirl]

OMG. I've still got a limerence object that is the compilation of my abusive narcissist parents. I know on every logical level that he's a creep; I haven't gone a day without obsessing over him for over a year. What I would give to feel that release! How truly wonderful.

[@irismckay6472]

Yes! Great podcast. Especially grateful for the section on trauma dumping. When we release our trauma in a healthy way, it's healing, when we share it to get sympathy or validation, it seems to get bigger.

[@andreavanda5402]

This one REALLY hit home! Dr. Anderson is such a gift. Lewis you are one special person with a HUGE heart. Thank you for bringing hope and healing to this world. ❤❤❤

[@rnancyp7986]

I love how Dr Anderson sorts out the nuances of the emotional experiences in the trauma clearing process, so incisive!

[@miyukiharley]

Yes , feeling like you are nothing because of seeing yourself as only having Value because I accomplished this or that thing.

[@JanieAmericanIrish7777]

Repairing starts with forgiveness and understanding. Forgive what was done. Seeing how it effects your life. The hardest is to understand when it pops up.We learn what to do till we are in that trigger . If we fall back. We have to forgive ourselves for not being perfect and tap ourselves on the back when we do overcome a trigger or a emotional response. We have to take into consideration that others we deal with might be masking their trauma as well. So you might trigger them. I get the wounded walk away or ghosting. When things are difficult to address we run. We all have that fight or flight response . It's freeing when we face it .Thank you for this video. Lots of trauma in my life. It bothers me when others say your using it when your trauma when your not ! This is only because you told them and they are using it to beat you with or put you down. It ticks me off. It's hard to confront when the people are no longer in your life. My father beat the hell out of my Mom and even tried to kill her. My easy memories are sleeping in the basement hiding behind boards with my Mom as he came in drunk and dragged her upstairs by her hair beating her ! He was a product of his childhood. My Mom was a product of her childhood. Both were broken and created broken next generations. It stops as you see how in your life that trauma effects you . I learn that it's like a dopamine hit to emotionally go back to that same negative patterns. I see when I do it but it's a best that I created. Healing In my thoughts starts with you. My fight or flight is what I have to identify more. That need to run or react to negative things. To not get into your own head or follow patterns that lead you to tgat sane kind of abusive situations. People are good to talk to but do not live your experience. They can offer a shoulder only. Drugs are a bandaid. All drugs keep in mind came from nature. Now keep in mind that most qho went off were on strong drugs and therapy. Like I said it's a consistent effort for those who are in a deep mental breakdown. The problem in this Society is we give drug's like pez dispensers. To people who don't need it and end up addicted or doing more drugs ! Do not address the root. That is a desire and finding the tools to heal. Natural cures for depression. Medical treatment for complete breakdown only. With follow up. A majority of us are in imbalances because of our diet and lifestyle as well. Once again thanks for this video .

[@michelehoover777]

Wow! This was so powerful! I have been working on trauma recovery for years but this really hit home. I would love a follow up with Frank Anderson on how to help out kids early so we can help release any trauma already caused and how to prevent further small t traumas with our kids. ❤

[@oaktreedialogues6318]

I love the "AND" teaching : can i love you AND acknowledge that i was deeply hurt by you?

[@Indigochildwithin]

Òmg this man is incredible. From a people pleaser because of a very dramatic childhood.i have spent all my life until the past 4 years,I only stopped because of more trauma of being bullied the past 9 years, I am angry at myself worrying about the very people that have bullied me..their loss they would have had if I had told on what they did/ doing. Now I am being kind to myself,don't be angry,it's the last part of the people pleaser experience, Now the voice inside says your being silly,snap out of it...let it go. Lewis you are a lovely gentle,kind beautiful man,I am so very sorry for all your hurt...you had to live thru, You are helping so many people with what you are doing,with the guests you have, You are loved..

[@mariadodds2042]

Frank is a great teacher. His transparency is very refreshing. I've just ordered his book 'Transcending trauma.' Thank You.

[@skychua7820]

How is the book helping you,how much does it cost at Amazon

[@lorraine8428]

'who hasn't harmed or been harmed?' woowww so much packed in that

[@Areyouanarcissist]

Some much worse than others

[@jelenahermanovic9740]

YES. Thank you both so much. "I didn't learn it, I healed it." Amen. 🎉

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for watching! 🧡

[@tenalemasters6802]

Forgiveness is not for the other person, it’s for you. Find a way to forgive it’s so healing

[@spinnettdesigns]

I'm about the age of Frank and similar in the drive for intellect etc. and I had several of these shames and I think that the neglect is the worst. Yet, after 20 plus years of therapy and every other health protocol known to man, its been totally worth it. Going from "I'm nothing" to mental health is the best feeling in the world. Please continue everyone and thank you Lewis for bringing these great helps to the fore.

[@susanoker4780]

I was once told that "Forgiveness is setting a prisoner free. And then realizing the prisoner, was you". Carrying that anger or hurt or negative emotion does not hurt them or affect them. But it hurts you. It affects you. That has always stuck with me.

[@michellemonet4358]

But anger is a stage in grieving.

[@susanoker4780]

@@michellemonet4358 Agreed. Anger is a stage of grief. But holding on to that anger, carrying it around with you, where, when you talk about the memories, you are right back in that moment, just as angry as when it first happened, that is not grief. That is trauma. And the only one being hurt by it over and over again, is you.

[@Katrina-z1c]

That guy is versatile and inspiring the way he learned to help people in his job. Picked a lot up from this . 🙏

[@shellytjohnson]

“I’ll tell you what happened to me. We’ll start there” 😂 Absolutely love this man 🫶

[@SH-ix6mc]

This interview was such a gift. Thank you both 💚

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@marycorkery2111]

Cranio Sacral Therapy is also a wonderful therapy that brings a somatic release

[@Areyouanarcissist]

Plz elaborate on that therapy

[@DianeO-369]

Wow, disconnecting and disassociating for survival as children... and leaving the family unit to heal in adulthood... and then going back to revisit to heal the 'whole' family... this podcast is powerful... Thank you♡

[@Emolisst68]

This is the BEST podcast I’ve listened to! Thank you thank you thank you!!! 🙏 😊

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@dawnbrookman]

So true. Kids are born with deep wisdom and love are so close to their (all of our) true essence and learn not to listen to this wisdom because of "life." There is nothing more pure and beautiful than a person who always speaks truthfully with a childlike heart. To be more childlike, you don't have to give up being an adult.

[@mariakarinabarrientos1656]

YES! Cried every “aha” moment. I love your channel! Please continue to share insights and healing practices into the world. I have so much interest in your work. Love and kindness be… Thank you !

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@JeanJeanieJeans]

This was one of the best talks about trauma and therapy I’ve come across. Thank you for introducing me to Dr. Anderson.

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@ElisPalmer]

What a beautiful conversation. Thanks so much ~🌟

[@CootiQueen96]

Thank you so much for asking if it's okay not to forgive and then breaking down that forgiveness is not about condoning the behavior. I've been stuck on thinking forgiveness is saying what they did was okay and kept me from being able to forgive. This helped me so much.

[@nkundwashanice574]

The questions Lewis asks is exactly what I ask myself before he asks. Bless you for being a good interviewer. You were born to do this😮

[@lewishowes]

So glad you enjoyed it! Appreciate you for watching.

[@brigett2704]

Thanks!

[@lewishowes]

Thank you so much 🙏🙏

[@WeGetRealHere]

I love Dr Anderson! I love his interview with Terri Cole as well. Such wonderful insights

[@shorelined1]

Thx. Will have to look that interview up because Lewis wastes so much time interrupting and grunting. Ruins any flow.

[@lailahreich3205]

This is what the whole world needs. The problem with evreything in human's plight. Its an internal problem of self and self love. Thats profound.

[@HappyCat1111]

Wow, really feeling the intellectual compensation! Getting my second degree plus other diplomas and certifications, wondering how many degrees will it take to prove my worth..damn, that hit home!

[@48dette]

This is amazing! I had so many aha moments! I just wanted to add as people may find this interesting, I suffered abuse my whole childhood but managed to push it away to the furthest part of me & bolt the door shut. Then in my adulthood after my father died, I married & had kids then slowly things started to arise. I was very confused because I had the symptoms of feeling unworthy & not good enough, but didn’t know why. After my first child was born my father came to me in a dream, he was crying I realized that this wasn’t just a dream, it was a message he had planted the first seed to my recovery. & this was the beginning.

[@lewishowes]

So happy to hear we have supported you!

[@aureliere]

What a lovely conversation on healing with Dr. Frank. His loving kindness and compassion shone through. Thank you Lewis and team for bringing him to your platform.

[@florentinaguggenheimer6557]

This man is a sweetheart. His voice reminds me of the guy on Schitt's Creek. Comforting♥️

[@MichelineNaderOfficial]

❤❤❤ YES! When we can release the trauma stored in our body, not only can we enjoy life more, but we can show up as a compassionate leader and create an entirely new version of reality. Thank you Dr. Frank and Lewis for inspiring so many people through your dedication to increasing awareness and having conversations like these!

[@Areyouanarcissist]

How

[@baileyb8619]

He is incredible. This is the most succinct and beautifully articulated message I’ve heard on this topic.

[@lewishowes]

Appreciate you for watching!

[@marlene447]

Wao this got me crying. Journey to self healing on its way! Thank you!

[@penniroyal4398]

I went to the bookstore today to buy this book and it’s not stocked yet but I requested to have one saved for me when it does come! I am looking forward to read and use it to recover from all the pain, trauma and suffering I’ve gone through in the 64 years I’ve lived this life so far 🙏

[@lalitaholmesstressfreefast1897]

Yes, you can look younger releasing trauma. I had a client who was told after a session she looked like a 16 year old. She was in her 50's at the time. I am constantly being told i look 10 years younger than i am

[@truthrn201]

I love my enemies but i no longer give them access to impact my life. Im doing great over here and when they see me, I hope they know true love and see an unstoppable woman! I don't need to harm anyone else to succeed or feel better about myself.

[@maevebutler4641]

Yes. I enjoyed listening to you sharing the conversation you had with your younger self..so beautifully articulated & very moving Excellent interview from listening to you both sharing experiences and how to heal our traumas.

[@daott2213]

After healing a big part of me, and Dr Ramani was there at the start of that journey, it became apparent after that she has healing to do. I love and appreciate her and her work to help people but there’s beliefs she carries that are not in alignment to her core which is unconditional love. It’s the core of everyone’s being.

[@daott2213]

It’s also why I disagree with Dr Ramani on empathy being the most important factor in our kids. They aren’t lacking empathy, and that’s not what creates narcissists…they’re lacking self love, a sense of worthiness. I agree with Dr Anderson, shame is the most destructive. We shame constantly as a society. When I see someone in a negative emotional state, I just know they’re reaching for a better feeling. I can now make space for them and know that if I need boundaries then that is never their burden.

[@anikalee9012]

I don't have anyone to share. So I stay in my body imagine Cristal Lord Buddha inside me give me compassion that I can feel with my whole body. I took me tree years I keep releasing many feelings I never know I have.

[@RoseRoseRoseRoseRoseRose]

If you are alone, then please write it down to vent & read about some healing techniques of professional psychologists to cure. Choose your favorites so you can give your heart a chance to heal. And never be chronically harsh to yourself when you have hard times because mostly, it's also one kind of trauma response to bl4me yourself (not always your fault). Much love & kisses❣️♥️🫂♥️

[@michellecook-hill]

@@RoseRoseRoseRoseRoseRose kisses??? A little much.

[@jessicama5799]

Try inner child healing. You witness your own pain and comfort and show up for yourself. It works and you know what your younger self needs more than anyone else.

[@2minuteschallenge599]

Much love & kisses. You are blessed You are unique You are a Survivor You are one of a kind You are real You are a beautiful living human being with so much energy to share. Keep moving forwards ❤

[@elenaangheluta]

Wow ..this what your wrote you are aware of how deep is ? It’s huge congrats to you and happy you did it , we are never alone ❤

[@arasyard]

Thank you so much for these kind of interviews. Somehow one advantage of the internet can gave us the validation and help that we need when we don't have anyone to turn to. We are able to learn from different people who shares our struggles. Thank you Lewis for your channel.

[@lewishowes]

You're welcome, thank you for being here! 🧡