WATCH OUT FOR

[@NarcCon]

Book Link Below: Weaponised Love -a.co/d/g4bB4MI

[@imalwaysme4332]

Why can i not leave a message ? I can reply to a comment but not leave one .

[@SerenaWilling-c9f]

@@imalwaysme4332 not sure

[@Selah1141]

I purchased your book and now I just gotta find time to read it!

[@cherylgregory6027]

I had the holiday hoover last December (almost 2 years later) after I'd been discarded twice previously. Do not accept a hoover, they are adept at convincing you they have changed for the better. They do not change or don't want to. The cycle of narcissistic behaviour soon resumes again. They haven't the level of introspection to see that they are damaged and live in their own delusional world. They do in fact rewrite history in order to come back again. Their cruel behaviour is hard to accept and difficult for us to realise that these people actually exist. What a sad, empty existence. Great video, thanks Paula. Big hug to Remy. x

[@Redpill1962]

You are so right ! Same happened to me . He put on this new mr nice ,’I’ve changed act ‘ , . It confused me a bit but I knew something wasn’t right . Plus my boundaries created a problem for him . He got fed up and revealed his narc rage last time I saw him , complete with a snarly face . Good riddance ! I wised up sharp afterwards . But my ! They do some damage when you realise what you’ve been subjected to ! I’m living a good single life , but trust in men has completely gone .

[@thepragmatist]

Great comment. I completely agree with this.

[@NarcCon]

🙋‍♀️🥰🐕

[@mannazpsychicconsultant3125]

Just don't accept them back nothing good will come from it

[@DC71235]

They never grew up because they never had to. They’ve probably had enablers their whole lives.

[@thepragmatist]

That's a good point.

[@annie2873]

My narcissistic husband was always in a foul mood at Christmas so luckily I don't have many happy memories. This Christmas will be my first Christmas free from him.

[@bettydoughtery3920]

Merry 🎄 Christmas Glad you're free

[@NarcCon]

Enjoy in peace 🌹

[@Redpill1962]

@@annie2873 saviour every moment of a happy Xmas for a change 🥰

[@ajoibebebebe]

trust me! this will be your happy Christmas full of wonderful memories (bc he’s not there)!!

[@Jet-h7q]

Peace 🕊️

[@thepragmatist]

“Just remember that they’re not coming back for you.” Exactly.

[@Selah1141]

A boyfriend , I had 27 years ago would dump me and then Hoover me around the holidays and get me back into his life just so he would have someone on his arm to take to his holiday events. After the holidays, he’d start a fight with me. That was before I knew anything about narcissism that will never happen to me again.

[@carefulcyclist719]

The holiday period is a very emotional time, the narcissist knows this and will use that to manipulate you. Possibly through guilt or trauma bonding. Stay strong and stay away, this is a period for love and kindness, the narcissist cannot give you either.

[@DaisyCruz-yr3bu]

✋️💯

[@ananonym1617]

I was hoovered on Dec 24, 2023, and dumped and locked out December 25, 2023. Thank you for bringing this pattern to light.

[@HeSaidICouldntDoIt]

oh wow. yep this is what I started getting last week after 11 months. Still staying strong and holding no contact.

[@Selah1141]

I have already dealt with the holidays and let all of the narcissists in my life know that I don’t choose to be with them during the holidays this year. I will be spending my Thanksgiving, my Christmas and my New Year’s alone with my service dog and that’s just fine with me. I am finding that I just don’t even wanna be around any people at all anymore. The last narcissist in my life really did a number on me and I doubt that I will heal before I die at my age cause I’m almost 70. At any rate, I wish everyone here a very blessed and happy holiday season make the most of it that you can for yourself. Much love and many hugs to all. ❤

[@Michelehoffman-q7c]

I was in that shape for two years and then I realized I needed to have people in my life. Horribly abused by my narc sister, in laws and stepson, I'd had it-in every way. I isolated after getting rid of every toxic relationship and that meant every relationship because I was healing of my codependency and I realized I was surrounded by assholes. Last year I joined a gym, despite crippling PTSD and anxiety, I forced myself to go six days a week. I forced myself to make new friends and I ran from anyone showing narc traits or toxic liabilities-I dropped them like hot potatoes. It paid off and thanks be to God I found a handful of true friends, a stronger mind and body and a home away from home. It is hard, it's harrowing, but I hope you find your way back to others soon. I'll be with my husband and golden retriever this year, far away from slippery people and family toxicity.

[@kaba5821]

Much love and many hugs back!❤️ I too are planning a very peaceful Christmas holiday, with the best of company- my dog. And it truly is my choice, I’m taking care of and treating myself with kindness. That is what I need, and I’m grateful for being at a point in my life where I can really put myself first and be grounded in my decision. I do understand how hard holidays can be for many, but it doesn’t have to be dramatic. And it definitely has nothing at all to do with whether you are loveable or if there are people out there who would love your company or not. Because no doubt there is! And you are both loveable and worthy of it! I very much long for a family (not the same as relatives to me) but not necessarily for Christmas Eve/day, but for all the other days in life. I would love to find them eventually. But most important is that I have myself. And as anyone who has been blessed with a dog… ❤️

[@shericoleman7756]

I am 63 and recovery can be possible at any age that we are living and breathing yes ?❤

[@Selah1141]

@@Michelehoffman-q7c I am so happy that you managed to get past it all to the point where you can actually get out of your house exercise and enjoy new friends. I will get there someday too right now. I just need to be alone with God.❤

[@Selah1141]

@@kaba5821 dogs truly are our best friends here on earth.

[@treelover1050]

I HAVEN'T HEARD FROM THE NARCISSIST IN 4 YEARS. WE CAN GET A HOOVER MANY YEARS LATER. I HAVE BEEN NO CONTACT 4 YEARS. HAVE SPENT THESE YEARS STUDYING THIS CONDITION IN PEOPLE AND IN SOCIETY. STAY AWAY FROM TOXIC PEOPLE FOR YOUR HEALTH.

[@variniaspartacus5860]

Learn to spot the RED FLAGS and say NO THANKS AND F OFF

[@sleeperno1215]

Three years for me. I refused and still refuse. They got the message. But they will likely try again.

[@elderlypoodle9181]

My mother built up Christmas then demanded strict rules. Couldn’t be 5 minutes late, couldn’t eat too quickly, couldn’t laugh to loud, couldn’t relax until her champagne. A tense time until she relaxed.

[@jackiel7726]

So sorry that sounds awful. 🫂❤️‍🩹

[@orana23]

I am sitting at a place where I had an evil discard nearly 20 years ago, reflecting how I went home sobbing and crying out to God- what am I doing what's wrong? After listening 2x to this podcast, I decided to sit in the exact same place and reflect what it is like today. Thank you God. Thank you Paula.... your educating and love for us is a gift.... so here you are with me Paula (being that friend) where once I was in devastation and today for the first time I sit calmly, at peace, making a beautiful new memory🤍💝 Life is very beautiful

[@jackiel7726]

👏👏 well done 🫂 I know your pain ❤️‍🩹 It is devastating but we must move on for ourselves.

[@orana23]

PS to above.... FIRST TIME SITTING IN THAT EXACT SAME PLACE FROM 20 YEARS AGO I MEANT....😌

[@orana23]

​@@jackiel7726thankyou

[@NarcCon]

Such a wonderful message to hear God Bless You 🙋‍♀️🐕

[@joannajohnson696]

I have never had a merry Christmas or a happy birthday or any holiday with the narc. He ruins my birthday. His family throws him a hug birthday party with cake, cards and gifts galore. He gives me nothing for any holiday.

[@Jet-h7q]

It’s weird that they do that to everyone. Last Christmas my daughter wanted both parents together at Christmas so I invited my ex husband and to avoid exactly what you spoke about, agreed what he would bring - sparkling wine and a gift for each other with a maximum limit of £20. On Christmas day, I gave him a luxury product he really enjoys and he said with a straight face, that he had no gift for me and did not bring the wine or anything else to contribute! So he came for Christmas lunch and day totally empty handed! I thought I had covered everything to make his behaviour acceptable and more predictable, but no. Really, it’s amusing now we are separated. What silly games he plays.

[@Fanlady4236]

I blocked my ex as soon as it was apparent he would not control himself. No matter who he asked for my contact info, they insisted he could contact me through my lawyer. He continued until my children (i call them that because thats what he called them for 40 years) both insisted he contact through lawyer. That was after 6 years after he walked away. Nothing for about 6 months, the longest he has gone without trying. I couldn’t stand being in the same room as him, he emitted evil. If he finds me and tries to hoover, I will laugh at him and also dial 911 because he tried to “hurt me” and make it look like an accident, several times. A non person either pretending to be bits and parts of people he admires, or a demon. Two masks, no face.

[@Glyn-r]

The narcissist tried to destroy me and my reputation. If they ever come back for some food supply, then this restaurant is barred to narcissists. Let them find their supply elsewhere.

[@legs1157]

My 14 year affair with the covert Narcissist was built on hoovers. Each time I was painted black I felt free and blissful for a short while until being unconsciously hoovered back in thinking obviously that we were meant to be. Now I'm a free soul ❤🙏

[@kerry-annesimpson9646]

So you knew about the other woman smfh that's horrible as hell and you did it for 14 years. Shame on you

[@legs1157]

@kerry-annesimpson9646 Raised in a narcissistic environment FYI. Judgement is the opposite of Love

[@legs1157]

@kerry-annesimpson9646 We're in this community to understand and unpack anything related to Narcissism! Thanks for your commen, but its quite unconstuctive in terms of the Narcissist and their victims. I think you best jog on and think about your dark night of the soul!!!!! Thanks

[@kerry-annesimpson9646]

@legs1157 No it's quite constructive maybe next time you will know better than to mess with some one else's man. Have some morals and values for yourself. The only time a person wouldn't think it's constructive it's because you see nothing wrong in what you did, and that's disgusting

[@kerry-annesimpson9646]

@legs1157 And to be honest if u did what you did willingly and knew about the person who he was with then you aren't innocent and you deserve everything he gave you

[@angelnocharlie]

I was just thinking last week did I want another Xmas being completely ignored by him when quite suddenly yesterday I saw on fb he had new supply flaunted and was fueling on all the attention answering everyone who made a comment strange as he barely says a word on fb normally. Ive been discarded again and it's staying that way I know what I'm dealing with now. I had no warning just blocked and replaced on the same day by him though we all know the new supply has been around awhile. It's all done so fast to cause shock and max pain for the left in the dark discarded party, oh dont forget the i miss you text right up to the day of discard for max injury. I'm looking forward to a nice peaceful Xmas now.

[@teresagarcia7580]

Congratulations 🎉

[@wandarios5440]

Excellent summary on Hoovers. I had some earlier Hoovers post-discard, one about 5 months after, on Valentine’s Day. This obnoxious covert narcissist text me wishing me a “Happy Valentine’s Day” at a few minutes to midnight before the holiday was over. When I confronted Him, he said he had wished his mom, sister and friends Happy Valentine’s Day and why was it a problem with me. I replied, “Because I am not your mom, sister or friend and Valentine’s Day took a different meaning for us.” He, then, raged saying he was damned if he did or didn’t text me-either way he couldn’t win with me. And, then, he yelled at me that, NOW, I was going to stay alone. The audacity of this sick demented narc! The more I listen to videos relative to Narcissism, I see more examples of exactly what I went through with that Narc. Thanks, Paula, for your thorough and helpful videos that have helped me to understand what type of “situationship” I was in because, realistically, there was never a relationship as we all know. 🙏🏼❤️BTW Remy brings such a calm feeling in the background! Such a cutie! ❤️

[@NarcCon]

🙏🐕🥰

[@tinaureta9891]

Thank You Paula!!! You really understand. “The WORLD IS WAKING UP, THANK GOD!” I love what you said. So many suffering… we must be VIGILANT. For the Devil is like a Lion seeking whom he may Devour. They Devour your soul… BUT WE HAVE A SAVIOR! I called on the Name of My JESUS and HE Saved me! I’m 1.5 years FREE….. and it’s just in the last 4 Months that I have felt “UNATTACHED, UNATTAINABLE, & INDEPENDENT “ from the COVERT NARC/Genius Psychopath

[@angelnocharlie]

I got fed up with a text situationship and rebelled not answering quickly and then called him out for not answering me and that the 20yr old mr2 he just bought was for a date that Saturday night. Wasnt hard to see the pattern as he left and got married before after buying a sporty car to impress, that marriage lasted six months and she requested the divorce she said. Hey presto a week later the grand new supply reveal. Just laughable how predictable they are once you've been through the mill before.

[@variniaspartacus5860]

I experienced a little hoover last Christmas and New year we had only been separated for a few months at the time. He ran away leaving all behind especially the bills. He wished me and the dog a happy and prosperous new year, rather a slap in the face. He left the bills and no money ❤

[@PinkRoseDawn]

Dark spiritual energy- true.

[@Christine-j7b]

Sad but true happens with borderline personality type too, I just stay no contact now. Your doggie is in bliss such a cosy scene!

[@christinelamb1167]

Thank you so much Paula, for these podcasts! It is always good to keep having reminders of who and what the narcissist is, and their tactics, so that we won't get caught up in their web again. I need these reminders!

[@elderlypoodle9181]

Remy is the wisest dog on the trail.🙏🏻

[@NarcCon]

Very experienced ☺️

[@jeffs.7412]

I been lying to myself, I told myself no narcissist will interfere with my holidays. I have a older sister who is now smearing me with my nieces and nephews.. I let her get into my head, I'm running out of family. My God how evil these beings are.. Tis the season, God bless all and happy holidays.

[@Michelehoffman-q7c]

The family who matters and whom you want in your life will find their way back to you-my brother did. I get it, same exact thing with my sister and her children. It wrecked me but I won't allow them to hurt me, ever, ever again. It gets better Jeff, Godspeed.

[@lalunar8]

My memories of holidays and birthdays are painful because they weren't that pleasant and at the time i accepted what was. Last Christmas time we took a trip together and it was also close to his birthday, i went all out to make him happy but he was really off, and mean to me, and distant, shortly after that he discarded me, i believe he was already with his current supply and he knew it was our last visit together.

[@reinar915]

My god, I just understand that my narc sister has been hoovering me into celebrating Christmas and New Year’s Eve. I didn’t get any days off, so I went last week instead. I thought it would be a fun week, haha. We are almost 40 years now, so my expectation of a normal celebration isn’t so weird. I didn’t see my family for some time because I live in a foreign country. But I just realised that I have been hoovered back into a future faking story of (early) celebrating Christmas, with fun escape room game, nice food and cooking plans, a prepared room with fireplace and Christmas tree, and so on… in the end I got physics slapped in my face, she didn’t come to say goodbye when I left and now she blocked me everywhere. I am laughing because the peace at my own place and their drama and chaotic situation (my parents enabling everything) is such a huge contrast. It woke me up even more, my peace is so much more important to me now. Despite all the bullshit, I am feeling free and strong more than ever. Thanks for reading, I needed to vent this for a second. Lots of love ❤️❤️ And wishing you a peaceful Christmas 🙏🏼

[@Michelehoffman-q7c]

Ugh. We went no contact with our narc son in May after a brutal attack on his part here at our home on Mother's Day. We received the holiday hoover from my husband's sister two days ago-he reiterated that we will not be a part of the narcissistic cult that is their family-stay strong, stay no contact and enjoy a peaceful holiday.

[@stinaseemer4811]

Thank you again. Feels good to be reminded of all the good people like you who are out there ❤

[@jayTee-zp1jn]

Mine has tried Valentine Day hoovers in the past. Yeah, I’m a softie and romantic but nooo way was I falling for that crap! Ignored! They really think we will soften up but when we know, we know.

[@teresagarcia7580]

I didn't know what a hoover when I looked back he sent me a text on our would-be anniversary which I thought was bizarre now it all makes sense what was happening then 😢

[@mrs8792]

You are dead on!

[@billybotts9521]

Happy holidays Paula & Remy God bless and thank you for all your help over the last year, you're amazing lady 😃

[@NarcCon]

Happy holidays!

[@angiemcguinness355]

Great video again Paula. It's awesome to see Remy so comfy.

[@NarcCon]

Thank you! 😊

[@Selah1141]

You mentioned going back to that place and creating new memories. I have been doing that now for well over two years and it works! (of course all of the narcissists in my life telling me that all I’m doing is going back in ruminating over the past they obviously don’t understand that that’s how you deal with the past and heal from it) But this one I cannot do too traumatized over the holidays with family and spouses.

[@thepragmatist]

Paula - Thanks so much for this video. You hit the nail on the head.

[@NarcCon]

You are so welcome!

[@victoriagarcia-xb8ki]

Paula, you help me stay sane and make me laugh! What you share is so true and such a good reminder to not go back to life in the gauntlet they create for us!! We will regret it if we do. God Bless You!

[@NarcCon]

🌹🙏

[@i.l.9546]

This narc hoovered after 1 month, 3 months, 6 months and again 6 months, like clockwork. We had a relationship for almost 6 years. So accurate, Paula.

[@martyrose]

I tried doing the holidays once. I got chewed out because I told him to get off Facebook and eat Thanksgiving which he shoveled in his mouth and ran off to play with his friends. I then got scolded for hanging Christmas ornaments in the wrong places on the tree. That was it. I'm all done. Never again. I just spend the days with my dogs they're much better company. Thanks Paula & Remy!! 🐾 ❤❤❤🐾

[@NarcCon]

🐕🙋‍♀️

[@trisha_harris]

He tried it at Mother’s Day. Sent me a message saying our kids were blessed to have me and so is he 🤮 I didn’t reply. Yuck yuck yuck. He regularly does it still, reaching out to ask about things that have nothing to do with the children, which is my boundary.

[@mikhailvalyaev3518]

Thanks a lot!

[@sharynhassard1625]

Thank you Paula...spot on as usual. Remi has done a walk off😂 Much love from Oz❤❤

[@NarcCon]

He’s extremely self directed 🤓🐕

[@shericoleman7756]

Thanks!

[@NarcCon]

Sheri thank you so very much 🌹🐕

[@prunelle9051]

This is bad... but I discarded him and went complete no contact on the first of January 2020 without him expecting it. I googled his behavior, found Sam Vaknin and OMG. I knew what I had to do. I know that he is stuck with it while I'm celebrating it. Someone showed me pictures of him 2 years later celebrating the New Year with his current supplies. A woman version of himself, her (what I can only suspect) BPD histrionic sister and her narc husband. I knew right there and then that HE was dumpster diving and that they would eventually go after one and another. People with addictions and multiple mental health problems. The woman double looked so weird on the picture ... she told on herself. The ''official partner was there too. Sad situation for her. It's not going that good even though they want us to believe the contrary. My discard caused a massive injury. Massive. But hey, sometimes when you play with people, you meet your karma as an educated empath.

[@johnpichla9557]

You bet it's coming 😂 most definitely when you provided everything 😅

[@Lenak2266]

Thanks Paula,! 🙏 You and Remy look super cosy Paula ! Sending Grattitude !!.🙏 ✨ Love & Hugs to you both. 🤗💝💞🐶💖✨💖🌟

[@NarcCon]

Thank you so much you too Lena 🥰🐕

[@paulbrouyere1735]

If ever I see my narcissistic ex again I will call emergency number

[@painteddaisy6889]

Excellent!❤

[@kellyp4377]

Thank you, Paula, I needed to hear this now. I’m going through the Hoover right now…. It is beginning Right at the holiday season….

[@naspa2790]

They will keep trying to find a weak spot like a thief breaking into your home. Once in, they will rob and destroy. They will smirk at your weakness and feel powerful as they return to ravage your soul. Remember the lies and bad things they did. That’s who they really are. Not this pretend nicer version. You deserve much better. ❤ Love and respect yourself. I say this from my long history with a gentle, lovely COVERT narc who had me brainwashed for too long. I was an excellent long term source of supply. He used me while I thought he was loving me and needed me. I’m an Empath… so easy for Narcs. I blocked him from my phone. A year later I saw his number in my blocked folder. I’m sure he’ll try again. Like a drug pusher he hopes I miss the loving doses of dopamine he provided. Almost 2 years without him in my life. Lucky for me he’s now living in a different state. I’m much better but still healing.

[@transitionsnc]

Hi Paula ~ I wanted to let you know that I watched this video twice and it was very helpful. I unexpectedly had a holiday hoover from someone I hadn't heard from in 6 months. (platonic friend) I haven't responded, but I don't think she is in a good situation and my guess is she is looking for some type of support. I know this video is mostly geared towards romantic relationships but I wanted to write this comment so people know it happens with friends too. I had initially tried to help her but backed away when I could see that my "friendship" with her was becoming a one way directional energy of me assisting her (albeit in small ways). Often times, this one way directional energy is subtle and we don't even realize it, especially if it's a friendship and not a relationship. You're not seeing the person every day so I think it takes longer to pick up on. The conclusion I've come to is that I'm not obligated to respond to people who are potentially dangerous. This can be hard because a holiday hoover seems so innocuous, but I really think if you've seen the signs of destruction that it's best to stay away. Thanks for the time that went into making this video. Apologies for my long comment.

[@NarcCon]

🌹🙏

[@lolachlih3136]

Remy is adorable 🥰 your on point with this one they’re dark and so evil especially when you have to co parent with then I wish I can block him from my life for good thanks Paula❤

[@terribaxter5828]

This will be my first Christmas narc free!! Think I'll have 2 helpings of dessert, cuz I can! 😂 another great podcast. Thank you so much for being here! Love to you & Remy 😊❤

[@NarcCon]

🌹🙋‍♀️🐕

[@noelenesharp9615]

Thanks for this Paula and Remy. The narcissist in my life discarded me just prior to our 3rd wedding anniversary. His (new)is his old supply is (the same supply that got involved with him 3 times previously ) He previously was a Christian pastor sadly. He wrote a book years ago called Prick Radar which I am reading again. This time the rereading is showing the exact behaviour he exhibited at the time he discarded me.

[@tjtampa214]

You are right, Miss. 😊 Funny (not funny) when you said... "so, if you've recovered yourself- they want to see 'what else' you have for them." 😉 I had to laugh because you used this perfect "lilt" in your voice & it fit the statement perfectly. Thanks for the encouragement. 🌷 God bless you & enjoy your Thanksgiving being free! I know I am. 🍂🍂💃🍂🍂🌼🍂🍂💃🍂🍂

[@johnpichla9557]

The new " person " lied and couldn't provide the resources they thought was there? Boom! Hooverville, I want my old lifestyle back 😂

[@reverentalexanderchezeley-6367]

Talk about Narcissists being vampires. I've always wanted since I was little to play Dracula in a comedy spoof version on stage in the theatre. I can envision it now, me stepping out of my coffin in the dark, cobwebbed vault of my Transylvanian castle at sunset, in my long black cape and fangs, and as I step out of the coffin I slip a disk in my back. Vampire bats flying around the vault. Me bent over in agony holding my hip, shouting "Oh God me back." Ha ha ha ha ha, lol. Saint Anger Master Empath

[@gwynethst.francis7041]

He has (typically) "never celebrated Christmas" BUT this year he turns 60 and now wants to return to Italy for good. To live with his mother (typically) because he is down and out. Hasn't been back to Italy for over 40 years!

[@DC71235]

Italy is getting a Peter Pan back. Cheers to you and I hope you enjoy the season and celebrate (or not celebrate) however you want.

[@lishmahlishmah]

Oh my gosh 😱 Italy here 😳 We already have enough narcissists here ! 😭

[@DC71235]

@ I hear you! We have too many where I live too. Hopefully that guy will eat pasta in his mother’s basement and leave the Italian empaths alone! 🥰

[@lishmahlishmah]

@@DC71235 🥰 Right. No panic. Let's stay calm. Ok, we offer FOR FREE a complete Italian old style high carb food supply > > delivered directly to the basement. All the holiday long. Hopefully high carb + high cal food will make him too sleepy to get up from the table.

[@DC71235]

@@lishmahlishmah I love this! Yes, and add some wine to his spaghetti stained t shirt for good measure! Cheers!

[@ninashirley432]

Awww that’s so sweet you have such a good friend that would do that for you! 🫶🏽

[@Minister-Misty]

Happy Holidays & Healing Everyone!

[@lreevesnyc21]

Paula the perfect video at the perfect time. The holiday Hoover. Essential reminders to those still in the stage where they still hope that their narc will see their mistake in leaving you and come back. There are so many stages in the healing process. If this is your 1st discard you probably cling to hope. You haven’t seen the pattern yet. Even the 2nd, 3rd or 4th discard. You know their history of childhood abuse and you excuse them as they got “overwhelmed” ( you tell yourself ) and isolated to regulate themselves. But if you have been discarded ( and they always just show up again) , this is not because, poor them they got overwhelmed. No…. These discards are PUNISHMENT… because you did something that annoyed them. Once you get THAT that truth, you get they are spiritually SICK to the core and… … you are done! You stop hoping, you stop waiting because YOU are DONE! But if you are not there yet, and it’s the holidays listen to Paula’s video EVERY DAY so that even if you accept the Hoover and pick up the incoming call or answer the text you will have it ingrained in your brain, heart and soul they DONT want you back, they just want to control you and get you thinking about them to ruin your Holliday! I am at the blessed stage where I get … his soull is sick and this cycle of madness will NEVER stop so I am completely done.! FREE! That day will come for you all. Be patient. Practice self love and care. Know you are great supply but they are sick so bask in the healing and gratification of rejecting their Hoover this holiday season and telling them you are done with their disrespecting you. 👍🏻 Taking control back of your life in this holiday season will bring GREAT satisfaction to your psyche and peace to your soul. No more waiting! Now, pass the turkey and gravy!🦃💕👍🏻🍷

[@DaisyCruz-yr3bu]

agree with you 💯 number one Christmas wish 🤞 don't accept hoover 🤡 the best present 🎁

[@NarcCon]

🙏🥰

[@user-yy9be9mi6n]

Just watched this! Valuable information as we are now in the "holiday season". Thank you Blessings to you Paula, Remy, and this community

[@NarcCon]

🌹🐕

[@jodiemccoy8892]

Remy ❤

[@jesusitrustinyou6900]

LOL @ REMY!!😴 NEVER BORING.

[@NarcCon]

So true 🐕

[@allisonandrews4719]

There are very few narcissism content creators, no actually there are no other narcissism content creators, or coaches on YT who come across as intelligent or authentic. I’m actually a former psychoanalytically trained therapist. I was trained at an institute founded by a man analyzed by Freud, a man credited with being one of the first to ever try to treat narcissists (I was an object relations therapist, though). Yet you wouldn’t even believe the narcissistic garbage I fell for. But I know you would, beautiful audience of this channel. I resonate with so much here, even if I might also still translate it back into my old analytic languages, too. So many YT narcissism creators are clearly narcissists looking for supply. It freaks me out a little bit. Mostly men. This woman is so fierce, I love it, resolute and brave almost like a heroine in a graphic novel. If I had that particular kind of storytelling talent, I’d take the KZbin videos as the frame of the box/drawing, and she’d start out in the corner and there’d be a fire in fireplace the middle-distance to the right and a sleeping dog that migrated throughout box by box. In the story she’d so somehow be saving all the sensitive souls from torment here on earth from her living room, not unlike a 19th century revivalist preacher except having nothing to do with death or (our) sin. Or maybe more like a herbalist. In any case, once you get over the main narcissist you may find some hiding in your family or friend group you practiced on. It gets so much easier to tell them all heck no.

[@NarcCon]

🥰🙋‍♀️🐕

[@i.l.9546]

Received the holiday hoover 2 days ago but I am busy with my new rescue puppy who was abused by her previous owner😊 Its a lot of work to gain her trust and thats what makes me happy❤

[@JaneMetz]

Happy holidays to you and Remy ❤

[@NarcCon]

Same to you Jane 🌹

[@MargaretDeegan-z3b]

Paula, wow, what a teacher, love you woman a long time, explained, My narc ex husband, my mother, my sisters, my brother, my ex friends, You would believe me, a lot would not. Devils

[@Steve20333]

she said she would send christmas wishes. and a happy new year! I gave her a little feed, I said no ! im too fragile ? what she doesnt know is the 5 January,im out of here ! I was retired , but have decided to go back to work ! I have a new job ! with my old company ! and that means good money ! I'm leaving here like a theif in the . night ! 400miles away ! I have had ENOUGH ! ive finally understood ! thanks to you ! theres no more doubt !

[@flowerpower4944]

Once you go No Contact,,keep them well away,t.y.Paula,💜💜💜🤗

[@Selah1141]

Thank you for yet another excellent video with great suggestions and advice!

[@allisonemig8578]

Excellent message! So very true!! Thank you! 💯😊

[@NarcCon]

You are so welcome

[@allisonemig8578]

@ I literally received Hoover day after Christmas, like clockwork. For first time, I felt nothing, just laughed, did not respond. Truly unbelievable! I'm so thankful I've reached this level of healing & can feel appalled by it all! Love your channel, you have tremendous insight & wisdom in this subject. Thank you & God bless you! 😊💖

[@llunavermella_bloodmoon]

I didn't expect a Holiday hoover. Yet I think it just came. I was with a narc in a volunteer group. He added my email address to a list of email addresses that would receive an email he sent today.

[@francesoakford241]

The ex narc dissappeared every holiday occasion. Because he was off Narcing all over the place. Their childhood trauma is glaringly obvious at these times. You see it. And it has nothing to do with us. 🙏🆘♥️

[@annewoodcock-rr8zv]

I had the holiday hoover last December, 18 months after being discarded and immediately replaced. The result: another year of hell and heartbreak. He was still with the new supply when he hoovered. When he confessed, he said he wanted to "scrape his boots" of 2023 (i.e. her). A year on and after stringing me along, turning me into 'the other woman' , discarding, re-hoovering and giving the long silent treatment twice more... they are buying a house together.💔

[@mainerockflour3462]

Thank God ypu are who YOU are. 💖

[@freemebaby26]

I left my narcissistic boyfriend, he is hoovering me now !

[@i.l.9546]

Imagine when they get older there are quite a lot of exs they have to think of on holidays😅. I dont miss him at christmas bc christmas holidays are my favourites and after my divorce 10 years ago I started to celebrate them with friends and my children and their friends and even having a funny christmas party with neighbours. My recent ex partner came to my party just once in the first year and the following 5 years he didn't. I could not have cared less. The next day he always asked in a jealous way if I had have fun and of course I had🎉. Making new memories of your own is the way as Paula says.

[@jeffreyexposito3803]

I exposed my narcassist when she last hoovered me last December. I highly doubt she will hoover me this year or maybe for good. The narcassistic injury must have been severe.

[@lordsberg]

Yes Paula! You are a Saint!!... And so am I. LoL 🕊️😘🌹🐩 Thank you so much for resqueing me again! In God's time and your fashion. 😍 I was just leaving a Coda meeting tonight where we had discussed some very deep issues, and I recommended your channel on KZbin. I was so greatly and pleasantly surprised to find your new video on my way home and I was listening to you on the drive. It's funny as you were talking about Hoovering I was on the highway passing "Hoover Road" LoL 🤣 I had never thought of it that way. LoL You are so on point and finally gave me the perfect answer to my situation. I am sometimes tempted and occasionally desiring especially with the holidays to make contact with my ex inlaws, especially my ex father in law, that I loved, and still love them all so much! But all that I've learned with your help, and even now with this video, the critical information, some specifically for me, and some for helping others, You are a Godsend, and a Saint! And I Love You so much!...but I digress lol😂 The Hoover in my case is definitely her expectation of me contacting her and/or her family! You are so right! The spiritual aspect of it is evident. Throughout many months even if I was tempted to contact my ex, I know I cannot because, any minor contact that I had with her at all brought spiritual attacks of demonic nightmares that would last for days! I certainly don't want any more of that! Of course, always the optimist, as I learn more about narcissism, the desire to help, heal, and desires to fight the evil forces that envelope and/or control her, attempt to forge ahead. But then I learn more from you, and the Lord! Not always particularly in that order. LoL 😆 But forging ahead in Gods truth. Sometimes I Pray for them, and I'm moving on. Everything you've said and described in this video is perfect!! You know my situation is so very on the far side of spirituality, very few would comprehend it. You tend to get to the bottom of things and beyond! 😉💓🌺 I'll never be able to thank you enough, and we (King Phattie 👑 and I) are still hoping to meet you and Remy one fine day! God Bless You!!! 🕊️ THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! !! Love, and Shalom, Always, Rev.LB 🌹😇🐩

[@NarcCon]

Shalom 🐕🙋‍♀️

[@contessamendoza7935]

Nope...I got a permanent stalking order.!!

[@Journeyofhealing-o9o]

Thank you, Paula, for the heads up..He will be left in the pit he has dug for himself and leaving him with his own wicked devices..God will do the rest..Satan is Not going to steal my Joy..Happy Holidays to Everyone!!!! ❤u Remy ❤u Paula..Stay Blessed..Take Care

[@darinattard3244]

The last communication with my ex wife, was truthful as can be. I told her to go to hell and never contact me again. Since 2013, no contact.

[@Carl-pq9vd]

I had to work in the lead up to our last Christmas. No gift for me but I was expected to pay for gifts and mail them to her family and friends. She went to do groceries and blew 600euros of my money on food, stuff we didnt need and gifts for her pets. We had a plan to drive to a special place for christmas day. Day arrives and she retreats to a shed saying she has to do a reiki session for a friend. I wait six hours for her. She rages when I'm upset day is ruined. Cheap microwave dinner, she plays with her parrot and calls her friends. I've spent the whole day alone. First Christmas after i was discarded my cat who i asked her to look after till i found a home is brutally killed.

[@NarcCon]

🌹🌹

[@barbaragodfrey1402]

Love your show

[@fokkerfilms560]

I don't know how anyone could call your house a kip?! It's gorgeous and very cosy looking. ❤ My house on the other hand... 😂

[@fokkerfilms560]

Hiya Narc Con, I think I got a HH this afternoon. 😂 I can't say 💯 because I've blocked her completely. I discarded her in January.

[@Journeyofhealing-o9o]

There's a song Haters are going to Hate Hate Hate Hate Hate Fakers are going to Fake Fake Fake Fake Fake Shake it..Shake it..Shake it off! This could be our anthem 😂 Tell Remy, Thanks lol just having fun..❤

[@NarcCon]

🤓🐕

[@johnmackey5237]

The doggie needs a rug in front of his couch. It's will make it easier for him to get up and down when he get's older.

[@NarcCon]

Thanks John he has..he’s 11 so needs it 🌹🐕

[@BAsed_AFro]

Western Civ is ripping itself apart, and with the quickness!

[@nomie1491]

My Angels have been warning me that my experience would try again and sure enough he’s using disposable numbers. I won’t pick up! I know he’s trying to ruin my abundance and I GOT HIS NUMBER😂😱😂 this angel can see through that mask!

[@mariannaoleshkevich8996]

Very helpful 👏👏👏❤

[@NarcCon]

I'm so glad!

[@GeoCeoLeo]

I was blind but now I see

[@SteeleAway]

I got a text hoover from the narc to remind me it had been exactly a year to the day we had our first date..after we had been broken up for 9 mos! It wasn't to see me but to play w my mind once again.

[@Michelehoffman-q7c]

My dog Jesse does the same thing, no offense of course, when he hears videos about narcissists-he sighs and lays down, but not before giving me the hairy eyeball. Thanks for all you do, not looking forward to the FIL hoover in the least-I'm prepared though, thanks to you and my golden retriever.🙈🙉🙊

[@NarcCon]

🐕🤓

[@ninashirley432]

As I have grown older I see all these holidays as just money making times . W think we need to keep in mind that their is people in the world with no food. Not to mention the wars . There are many countries that don’t celebrate these holidays, especially people that are not Jewish and Christian

[@tjtampa214]

Here's an idea: Have a separate "burner phone" if you must stay in contact with the NPD. That way, your regular phone is yours ... for your business and pleasure.. and you won't be disturbed constantly. And from time to time you can check the burner phone at your convenience when you are strong to deal with that person that you are trying to be no contact with as much as possible. They can just leave messages for you or if you're available, you can take the call . That will fulfill your legal obligations.

[@NarcCon]

👍🥰

[@JeskaJane.]

He even tried using St Patrick’s Day to talk to me - I’m Irish ☘️ but still! 😅

[@NarcCon]

Whatever works !! 🙋‍♀️

[@SerenaWilling-c9f]

Well he cracked my rib on the 19 th dec last yr so surely he won’t have the cheek 🤞x

[@NarcCon]

🌹🌹

[@reverentalexanderchezeley-6367]

What's the weather like there with you on the east coast of Ireland Paula love? Below freezing here in North Wales. Great video. Thanks Paula. Saint Anger Master Empath

[@NarcCon]

Cold 🤓

[@reverentalexanderchezeley-6367]

@NarcCon Arye.