What is she thinking and feeling when she says shes busy?

[@TheGryffindorable]

People mostly are never too busy for anything - if someone wanted to date you, they'd make time just like people make time for eating, sleeping etc.

[@llVIU]

I'd say if it's one week... sure. Honestly, I'm a guy who wakes up at 6 and comes home at 18:30. I'd barely have time to shower and drive anywhere... I need to be in bed by 22:00. I'd have to do it in one of my days off. So let's say that one weekend I am doing something importnat, whichever... okay, well typically you shouldn't be put on hold for more than 2-3 weeks, right? That's my opinion, what do you think? If she/he puts you on hold more than a month then he/she doesn't want to make time (i.e. thinks that walking the dogs or doing groceries counts as ''busy'') and she is not interested. Some people just want to be busy 24/7 and don't care about relationships

[@bradleyqnoble]

Victoria Daisy PREACH! 🙏🏾

[@thelegendkillersshittyduff1335]

Because there selfish pieces of fucking horse shit

[@v8matey]

If she says "She's too busy". Just add the words "For You" Afterwards. And there is your answer.

[@My6StringSweetheart]

Well said. If you confront them about it they'll play victim.

[@michelgregoire799]

Yes your not significantly for her...

[@whoisderf]

If she's "too busy" move on. Seriously, move on. There's ALWAYS time. There's ALWAYS a way to take a few minutes of your "busy" day just to say hi.... I had a job for a couple years where I worked 60-90, sometimes more) hours per week. I still found a way to att he very least shoot my friends and family a few texts or a quick phone call... There IS ALWAYS time!

[@zorin40]

My thoughts exactly and this is what ruined my marriage because she is not happy to let me go and yet not willing to get closer. I have now spent 26 years of my life hoping and dreaming and bearing the guilt that it is all my fault and I should be grateful for things done for me. But I don't WANT things done for me - I just want the soul, reciprocation a few minutes a day to just be closer to me- all this have been verbalised and no effect. Why don't I leave? Fear, uncertainty and shame PLUS it seems in Australia at least, chances of getting a decent woman interested in a non-white guy regardless of personality is near zero - from my personal experience.

[@michelgregoire799]

Yes

[@tomhill3205]

I'd rather be single than even think about being with these stupid time wasters. I really hate why they always have to be confusing

[@tomhill3205]

The best thing to do is just to cut them off and then they'll come back to you. It's the same with friends who think they can use you but the moment you cut them off then you have taken advantage of the other person

[@michelgregoire799]

Yes....

[@beatman9758]

i disagree with you. if girl who constantly saying she is busy is not interested in you. i went through this nonsense with my ex

[@DigitisedPaul]

What a nightmare to have to deal with.

[@MetalCooking666]

If what they're doing is "kind", why is calling them on it "standing up for yourself"? But, moreover... I have found that there is no point trying to reason with someone who is giving you the runaround. If they're not interested then they're not interested. The best you can hope for is that they will reluctantly agree to meet out of guilt and feel uncomfortable until they eventually admit that they're not attracted to you. The bottom line for me - and this is where a lot of the PUA stuff falls flat for me - is that I want a girl to go out with me because she really WANTS to go out with me. I don't want to have to confront her, make her feel bad or play any other kind of head game. These days I just take a zero-tolerance approach to wishy-washy girls and next them whenever they start with this nonsense.

[@SavertonJr]

You make a great point, I think within the interaction you have face to face try establishing the meet up there to see if shes into it. if she uses "im busy" then you can either try to push in terms of asking "if theres a way to fit it in her schedule" but if you are getting answers not to your liking, do what I did today, delete th convo and move on.

[@My6StringSweetheart]

People have time for who/what they *want* to have time for. Never buy into that BS excuse. You think if Chris Hemsworth tried to get in contact with her she'd brush him off *because busy?* No she'd suddenly have time.

[@ps2gamerali]

Bad Advice this will only make you look desparate. If she wanted to go out she would reschedule at a later time or date if she says she's busy just cut her off. Better luck next time

[@bobstanley8297]

I was going to do what she suggested but i’m glad i didnt because its too pushy

[@TheReaper002]

@@bobstanley8297 You have to be pushy sometimes even if it appears needy, personally I think this is good advice and if she says no the 2nd time you put the ball in her court saying: "sounds like you're very busy, hit me up when you're free". You never go for plans again until she initiates/brings it up and if not then you don't have a headache from dealing with a flaky woman.

[@Jass-ub5zf]

Women will give you the wrong advice, they want you to chase...

[@llVIU]

Tell that to women. Us men completely flood dating sites because we actually care about having a relationship. Women are reckless and put feelings over logic. They chase more ''masculine'' men who tend to generally be douchebags who have no real respect for women in a relationship... same way men keep chasing women who don't care about them, simply because the woman looks pretty. That's my opinion. Or at least my experience... I constantly put my heart into searching for someone and relationships... and in all 6 times I got dumped. I'm torn between thinking that I am not a good person or women are not good. Maybe it's a mix of both.

[@HairyBushPilot]

I followed these tips about a week ago and she finally agreed to go on a date. She canceled a day before the day by saying her "friend" was coming to town on the evening that we were going tot go out.

[@oncetwice5942]

I’d really rather someone flat out tell me they’re not interested than make too many excuses. I’m too old for mind games smh.

[@donsolo_9946]

💯

[@Pistonhammer]

AMEN !! seriously i mean that , Amen !!! The said chick is 37-YEAR-OLD nurse for crying out loud and shes just gotta tell me that shes not interested and thats that !! is it that f***ing hard !!!!! Am seriously at the end of my tether as thats all you got to say is NO !! For crying out loud !!! Am a 32 year grown-ass man and am getting too old for this childish mind games bullshit !!!

[@rajkittur1998]

If you want to be happy, then only you can do it to yourself, no other person will make you feel happy, productive or any other emotions.

[@antongurira2686]

Why does it have to be a game. Just be honest. It will make the world a better place

[@mav1877]

I generally agree with Hayley. However, there are some exceptions. I would wait a week or two then ask one last final time. I've had girls who expressed interest in getting together then gave this busy crap. I waited a week or two then asked one final time and got the girl out. The other option is to just say "When you figure out your schedule let me know." Then never contact her again and see if she replies. I actually had this situation just recently and I gave her one day and thats it. If she never replies, forget it.

[@monstersince]

this is youtube we're never busy

[@עמנואלנחמו]

Haha

[@SaidMahmoud]

I love your honesty, plain-spoken

[@priority45]

I usually don't ask this things on youtube, but I met a girl 2 days ago, we were making out, there was no space and time to get to the "final" part have been texting 2 days since (although already told me that she has important project to do on the weekend) and I wanted to close and asked if she has a free time during the week, she responded " I'm going to be super busy from now on, I'll let you know though", if somebody sees this comment I would appreciate your opinion. My solution is to skip the texting, call her next Monday, if she says being busy again, than is over

[@AspieGamer1986]

My ex just doesn't see me as important then. We aren't even dating and yet she can't make up her mind about whether or not to talk with me. Talk about ridiculous, why do women have to be so vague. God, wtf. Plus she like me has Aspergers. Well not my problem anymore I'm gonna go get my life together.

[@Pistonhammer]

I have Aspergers too and my F-ing gf did the same thing !! I mean why cant she just be upfront and honest and just say " No " for god sakes !!!

[@Kristoferwitha_k]

Ready?.......its means low interest. "Great. Let me know when your free" then, Stop reaching out. Saved you 10 mins

[@Lakk6Metal]

People in general, have many options. And when deadline comes up, they pick the best. And lies to the rest.

[@SHER7935]

Busy mean she not interesting x End off lol

[@3StonePoker]

Seems i've just met similar girls to this lately. Always too busy to make any kind of time for me, but seem to keep me on the rope. I tried the direct route and got told I was being too pushy. Don't fucking understand it myself to be honest. I have a kid and work fulltime but I can pretty much arrange any freetime I want if I gave a shit about someone enough, pretty clear I'm not that interesting :D

[@swamidude2214]

Ok so I called her today and she sounded really tired, as if she just woke up, but its the middle of the day. She is saying she is really busy with work and I know she is also not going out or anything like that. The problem is she also has health issues and does feel bad often. So basically I know it isnt just an excuse. We often had plans that didnt go as planned because she felt bad or tired. So she picks up te phone and sounds like when we were together and she felt really bad. So I just said sorry for calling you right now and ended it pretty fast. If she is acting it, its really smart, but honestly its hard to determine... when we broke up she did admit she was gonna miss that I always took such good care for her. But she didnt love me anymore and didnt trust me because I didnt keep my word several times and she didnt think we had a future together. I do feel with her issues she isnt gonna find somebody soon that will deal with all that. I mean sure for a while, but Im afraid she gets hurt because commiting to somebody with chronical disease is pretty heavy. Hell I love her and I would have taken care for her forever without questions asked. But even I am thinking, maybe its better that I dont have to deal with all that anymore. It has given me quite some freedom the last 3 months. Its a horrible thing to say and if you are together for 7 years and slowly health issues develop you arent gonna leave because of them. She often said weird things like that I could go if I wanted to and that I could do better or that she wasnt good enough and held me back. I never questioned it. I loved her, if she felt bad we stayed home and I took care of her, it seemed the logical thing to do. She is so vague and its so hard to figure out what it is she wants. I honestly think she now actually feels being alone is better. I dont know why she keeps pushing me away... I did mess up, but either she was telling me to leave because she didnt love me anymore or she says she doesnt love me anymore so I can leave. It can be both ways and I dont know which one was the lie.

[@zarkov821]

Very good videos, keep the good job 👏 by the way you have very attractive voice

[@iDTecKt]

What the hell do you do if you meet somebody while working, this has always ended up with me losing a chance?!

[@samgao]

Funny, met a girl at the mall, exchanged numbers texted her for a date, and she said she was gonna be busy all week with a ":\" Then I did the "Let's just go out for drinks for an hour" routing kind of a bit more aggressive and already put it in the "loss" pile when she answered "I'll see what I can do" which is weird... I mean hell, she could've just ghosted. Oh well, with that being out of the way, I'm still not holding on to this thread, but at least I just called her out on it, and if we DO decide to have drinks, there couldn't be anything but just brute honesty during our communication.

[@mav1877]

Well, i tried it Hayley. I suggested tomorrow. See what she says. Usually I just dismiss the girl and move on. But let's see as I did have a lot in common with her. She said she was out of town this week and next at a work conference.

[@MastorFonker]

Hayley, you're doing a fantastic job. Thank you for putting so much effort in it! It makes the (relationship)world a better place!

[@Bond10000]

Long distance thing here - I went back to her city on business and contacted her for a drink. What if she says that she liked me a lot when we met (hanged out, had fun and hooked up) but she’s currently going through a hectic moment she is in a terrible mood as she quit her job due to an aggressive abusive boss, the company is not paying what’s supposed to after she left and she’s been looking for jobs. Plus she will soon go to the court for a custody battle for her son? And she goes: “I was fine back then when we met but all these things now are making me feel like this: (eye rolling emoji)”.

[@Happybeargamer]

Yeah it's not cause honesty is bossy or considered that way or taught that way. I think it's just out of a disire to be nice, I've done the exact same thing as a guy.

[@stephenboud1711]

1st rule of text don't demand which is what she is saying creates a needy vibe . what you should be saying to yourself is "ive got my own life to live and i wont text back straight away until i no longer feel needy about it and i wont demand a yes or no answer from someone i haven't met since getting their number". best thing here is from my own experience don't let your own emotions rule you and when your ready try to change her mood not her mind. increasing the girls buying temperate with a few texts not loads but 1-3 texts and then go for the date again is far more important at this stage than getting a straightforward answer out of blue. shit advice from this girl. It would work if girl sent it to a guy but not other way round. No one do what this woman has just said please you will lose

[@spootnik00]

Not good advice if she likes the guy she will make time, if the guy persist then the guy looks desperate and it is a turn off

[@samiamgreeneggaandham]

I had a woman that I met at a saddlery. I told her mom I was getting a whip for a date.,. The date was something fake I said so that the mom would talk to the daughter and the daughter would come to me. They were both the owners. Family run business She hears me talk about it, whips around, listens, and comes up to me after her mom leaves, starts talking to me about the bull whip so on so forth. I end up telling her I want something less, explaining why it's bad to use that., End up getting her number, end up flirting, end up ending the conversation with her calling me sir and master. I asked her out for the weekend, she says she's busy, but free next week. I text her tonight, and she says she is unavailable for the week. I simply say it was nice meeting you so and so, have a good day. she then starts talking to me and texting me a bunch and begging me. I then say give me a day and time you're available and if you're willing to meet I'll move my schedule a bit to make it happen She refused. Why? Because she's not interested. She's an idiot. She came up to me, she initiated giving me her number, she started calling me sir, so on so forth. I say women are idiots in this regard, but they're not really idiots. They just like to waste people's time. It is not about being too kind, it's about being entertained by watching a man squirm. They will feign interest at all costs. No woman who is interested is going to go all of that distance only to turn away at the last second. It doesn't happen. I have had women literally travel the world to see me I've had women who ended up cheating on their husbands. Ruining their marriages potentially. I've had women get fired and lose their jobs to have sex with me. I've met the hottest woman on a jumbo jet with 200 other people on board, and f***** her in the bathroom and an hour after meeting her and getting to the mile high club on an international flight. women will do anything to be with a man that they actually want to be with. Under no circumstances should you assume that they're interested if they've turned you down and are single. and then if they really really really like you, they can be in a relationship or even married and it doesn't matter

[@seansayer7684]

Hayley I'm glad I found you. I've been tempted to go the stoic indifferent route mistaken for masculinity but I resonate with your call for male directness and masculine vulnerability. I've sent the message and I feel better now knowing I've spoken from the heart and if she still has no interest it's okay.

[@ericbaxter3944]

Worked 80 hours a week for 3 years in a row and had time for dates and fun activities. Susie from accounting surely can't be too "busy" with her part time job at Macy's. It's all a farce.

[@tabutu1]

busy=go away im not interested.

[@michelgregoire799]

Yes or a other or many others significantly guy are in the picture.....

[@NicsNutrition]

This is great advice!!

[@xanderv1984]

To the creator of video or anyone reading this, does the following response a pal of mine got from asking a woman out for coffee sometime = rejection? "Yes sure! I struggle to find free time though...very busy these days."

[@rivoncz]

This, this, this, thousand times this... Happened to me so many times... Thanks for this advice. I'm just wondering if it will work even after this "busy thing" happened and I stopped messaging the girl for a few weeks essentially.

[@willievargas671]

So that's why me and that girl are communicating each other was off

[@cashguyofficial1786]

This advice is only good because the girl in the video just wants you to get your head straight. If you really like the girl it's worth the time to get at her and if she agreed to a date and even went on a date or two with you and you know there was an attraction she just wants you to chase till she is actually free. This advice will fuck you out of the girl of your dreams if she really does like you.....

[@sanjayr7977]

Thanks for a great piece of advice,I didn't think of it that way.

[@cashguyofficial1786]

Your vague advise can make you loose the girl of ur dreams. It makes you sound needy if u say what she wants u to say. She is doing it cuz she's on the girls team and she wants dudes to get over it but if the girl likes u it's fucked up bad advise

[@antigtohighlights1079]

so basically she's telling us "No might mean Yes if you're just assertive" lol

[@troyharper6967]

I'm going through this right now I just stop asking & if she doesn't say shit then oh well I'm good on her because when I talk to someone else she will be pissed oh well

[@TheRealCalijokes01]

I been verbalizing now I think I’m a parrot 🦜 “maybe land”

[@gurtana]

Thank you, Hayley. Good advice, But one question that I am thinking though is what if the girl has a boyfriend but you feel there is a connection there? I am guessing your advice would be the standard "plenty of fish in the sea and move on", but I think life and relationships are more complicated than that. It's not that you want to wreck what she ma have, it's just you believe in more in the spark between you both. So, I'd like to see a video with advice on how to approach someone you know (from work, for example) but they might already be seeing someone else. Or is that just a general "no no. Don't waste your time"?

[@YoAmAGangster]

In all honesty that is a horrible advice. I used to do this with girls and they would sometimes agree to meet only to have them flake. Or they would keep giving more excuses or simply straight up ghost me. Fuck that. If a girl is "too busy" and does not offer an alternative when I ask her out or just hits me up when she's free, I drop her and move on.

[@RikthDcruze]

no one is every too busy...

[@SilverFox_82]

Loved your video she did say yes to me after a couple of days after I gave her a Valentine’s Day gift but said that at the moment she said she was busy with 2 jobs and said she would get back to me when she was free. She does smile at me at work cause we work in different departments and chats to me but stressing out if she is just telling me no in a good way or she’ll get back to me . I was told to ask this I’m going to just ask if she is still interested in going out or hanging out and If not I’m ok with being friends if it’s a no so at least I get a response instead of waiting and wondering

[@markjayasuriya7950]

Thanks Hayley, tried this today and it worked!. I was able to set a date, even though initially she said "i'll let you know"

[@YoAmAGangster]

What happened next? Are you in a relationship with the girl now?

[@JetsetUnited]

What happened with your situation Mark this being 2020 now?

[@azzazz4549]

This question is irrelevant. If a girl I found attractive walked up to me and I was busy I wouldn't care. I'd think it's a good thing in any situation

[@justme-so2en]

My. Gf is getting her doctrine and she’s starting her own business but still we are able to date and talk .

[@roopealho1515]

I'd rather they hurt my feelings straight than doubt.

[@justinl1511]

Appreciate this so much!!

[@infinitywarrior1017]

Hayley thank you for all

[@deathmachineusa2689]

I'm busy= Move on. She is not interested. Tell her Cya.

[@rubikscube6722]

This is terrible advice. She’s busy bc she lost interest in you and doesn’t have the maturity to just tell you that. She’s not being “polite” and “kind.” She’s cowardly and inconsiderate. When people know they are into someone they freakin know. No one is busier than she who is purposely blowing you off.

[@googleuser8740]

Hi Hayley thanks for your advise. I sent a variation of what you recommended to a girl I met online and got back the following reply:- "well thats cool you really sound interesting and i love that well i think we still need more time to chat here and see how it goes can you pls send me some of your photos and sure i will share mine also,,,,," What should I say next? Any thoughts anyone?

[@conormacdougal2344]

What is she thinking and feeling when she says shes busy? Tell her to get lost and walk away!

[@scienceisareligion2231]

Thank for the information but in my case it's late.

[@Zmego1234]

I like your perspective time well spent.

[@msa7490]

I absolutely agree with this video....

[@sullenday]

Your excuse for why women behave like this is pathetic "they said honesty was bossy."

[@varietygaming8901]

sullenday chill why you so negative

[@Simmuh2]

No downvotes crazy

[@HammerFitness1]

I feel like women will view that as "pushy".

[@JamalF11X]

Just walk away, life is short

[@MagicAyrtonforever]

If a women sleeps with you and she's not that into you.. She needs to move along..

[@kevinparkerful]

How about move on? Why put her on pedestal? Human beings will always make time for people or things of interest...ALWAYS!!!

[@charlesberry4893]

Or you could do none of that and just go find one that doesn't say "I'm busy" without a follow up date. There are billions of women find the ones that want you from the jump

[@russiandrivers9986]

I'm busy = I'm completely full of shit

[@beloglavisup2]

I just wrote a message in that context. I hope I'll get results

[@thefalsecritic9520]

This advice sounds like you're trying to force the date, which is never a good idea.

[@Holypikemanz]

going off without saying anything is pretty female. Leaving a good male message isnt bad.

[@Lakk6Metal]

Best is to stay single and alone.

[@jamesmakume2630]

what would Houdini do? exactly!

[@900cc]

What if it's your ex?

[@walt2121]

900cc Walk away, best strategy with exes 100% With a new girl is different but if it's your ex, you probably already experienced this kind behavior with her in the past and you probably pushed the subject that got you nowhere, do you think doing the same thing pushing will get you different results, wrong. With exes it's different. Best thing is to tell her maybe another time or let me know if you change your mind and walk away never look back.

[@ericmunyagatanga8186]

Bad idea! Do not force a girl to go for a date. If she says " I am busy" it's simply means she is not interested. Cut off all contacts, until she gets back to you. If not remember, there are plenty of fish in the sea!

[@monstersince]

Maria is sleeping. she prefers Darknet

[@MetaphysicalMusician]

3:15..cuts to the meat and mustard..ywc..Good advice

[@Mr.Meme1885]

To be busy, or not to be busy: that is the question. Stop being a psychological and emotional test dummy for women!

[@poshiziegler3082]

Oh wow. Exactly what situation im in. xD

[@KeikoFXDesigns]

You rock Hayley

[@cadillacman2141]

She's busy? Move on guy, just move on

[@michelgregoire799]

Or she is bisexual waiting for a rich doctor.....

[@corie_1032]

your beautiful!

[@LakenTak]

Gee, Hayley, instead of talking for 9 minutes, you could have just say, Guys! be Honest about what you want! There finish, all this small talk is just wasting my time.

[@LukeBass1000]

+Laken Tak :')

[@prestow]

+Laken Tak it's not a recipee for food, explanation is needed, and the most information you didn't get, she said how to talk to them and why too.

[@LakenTak]

praestvs She can really just sum it up in a 2 min video.

[@prestow]

+Laken Tak I agree on that.

[@LakenTak]

praestvs "Guys just be honest about what you want and if she still says no, just leave it" Even a min would do. People have short attention spans these days.