When Dumper Knows They Made a Mistake (Podcast 366)

[@vincentbos]

'GET YOUR EX BACK' Advice & Support www.dateme.tips/

[@rrrrrrraaaa9]

What is hard for many people including me is that it doesn't matter how long it's been of a breakup we somehow end up missing them. 2 years gone by watching videos like this but great information.

[@vincentbos]

Hi Maverick, thank you for your comment. It's important to remember that your feelings aren't in a race. You are going on your own personal journey.

[@lungisanimoyo7569]

She reached out on my birthday, 2 months after leaving me for her ex, which obviously didn't work out. Told her I appreciated the gesture, but we needed to let the dust settle first and suggested we shouldn't be in contact for the time being. As simp as it sounds, I didn't want to tell her to f@$I off, because I had to to handle it it like an adult, not play the victim. Haven't heard from her since, though I know things didn't go the way she planned. Wont be her rebound again. So will leave her wondering if I'm going to ever reach out again, though I have no intention, whatsoever to do so. Moved on with my life, got a good woman in my life right now, and see no reason to reach out. The healing process can be tough, but the lessons learnt are worth the it!

[@nickf9392]

Dumper...regret all you want, makes zero difference to me. I know what you are, and I know what you did.

[@mysterio5837]

i doubt my ex will realize her mistake. She had too many traumas and guarded with bipolar emotional fluctuations. She brought her past relationship traumas to the present . Those narcissist, hope they get punished for breaking up with good men

[@kevintator2303]

My ex decided to contact me after 4 months of NC saying she misses me like crazy lol. Gonna see how it goes, plan on seeing her today. Edit: so we spoke and she admits she missed me terribly and begged for me back. She seen the growth i put in during NC and taught her a few things I learned. We decided to move forward and grow and learn from our past mistakes. But we're taking it slow and not jumping the ship. Guys please trust NC, they will eventually revisit the idea of contacting you and wanting you back. At least that's what she admitted lol..

[@vincentbos]

Hi Kevin, this is wonderful news! Another 'No Contact' success story!

[@thomasgarayua4979]

Dude congrats way to stay focused and calm

[@gamegirl8945]

Hey man congrats! I’m pleased for you! How are you both getting on now??

[@nitehwk88]

Happy for you. I'm almost 2 months NC. It's a roller-coaster of emotions. Taking day by day working on myself. It's hard but it's all I can do.

[@carolmaz8675]

This is good but I would wonder why they felt that way and would they be more likely to do it again .. she obv thought grass was greener and found a few muddy patches !!! Tres carefully bec once they do it they can do it again x

[@josselin3393]

She might realize one day. Or not. Her loss and a chance for me as I deserve much better than what she ever has been for me. I will be thankful someday that she did not saw my value when living a great life with someone that deserve me. Was happy not to wish her birthday yesterday, bet she will never wish mine anymore and this is beter this way :)

[@vincentbos]

Hi Josselin, you will find someone even better than your ex. Keep moving forward.

[@districtagenda5695]

Bought myself a new 2021 sport blue Chevy camero and she’s my neighbor, deff driving around and flexing on the whole neighborhood hope she sees me in it at some point in the next 4 months while I have my lease

[@vincentbos]

Sounds good John, enjoy yourself!

[@Seren2010kinder]

I made every mistake Blocked her Unblocked her Went to therapy Got back together then she split up after 2 weeks Slept together then telling her I still loved her Told her I just wanted sex - did that a few times We texted all the time Then I begged and pleaded till the point she asked me if she wanted her to block me so that I stopped embarrassing myself I said yes I’m now in no contact Don’t make my mistakes lads Do no contact and work on yourself She don’t want to be with me and I got to move on now She kept bread crumbing me all the time It was very push pull Push me away pull me in push me away Not healthy I’m just waiting to see if she reflects and sees what she’s lost I was amazing to her

[@vincentbos]

Hi Scott, it sounds like you have gone through a very challenging time. Try to focus on your own journey and having positive days as a single person.

[@Seren2010kinder]

@@vincentbos we are going on a date on the 12th she said that she’s scared of relationships and is worried that I’ll leave or she’s got too high of an expectation in relationships She’s got anxiety and avoidance style We will try and go slow we both still love each other just need to woke I. Each other I’ve proven to her I’m not one to walk out now she needs to understand that she needs to look at how she is and acts I think we can work and will work hard at it

[@Seren2010kinder]

I have anxiety style with slight avoidance Get to know your style and work on them and yourself

[@Seren2010kinder]

@@vincentbos we are back together and taking it slow Time heals everything focus on yourself and see what you did wrong Open up communication after time when you’re in the right place and she’s had time I just opened up and told her I’m not leaving her and stop being scared So slow and Steady for now

[@Seren2010kinder]

Didn’t even have to wait till the 12th just went down here and chilled talked and had fun

[@jameskemp2166]

Sometimes the dumper realizes they made a mistake by ever dating the person in the first place

[@sony4ever93nyc3]

My ex told my daughter she is going to stalk me n if I disappear she is going to try to get me back because she doesn't want to lose me n I'm thinking if she didn't want to lose me why break up the way we did than I found out from my daughter she had 2 bf and I'm like I'm done I don't want nobody I really wanted to marry her than I'm starting to realize she is crazy

[@BonjourBijou445]

This topic is quite timely admittedly. I’ve begun to wonder if I should block my ex. Having him on my social media is ultimately just making me unhappy. I have trouble not snooping. Then again, if I block him, I’m afraid I won’t ever have him contacting me. It’s quite a dilemma. :/

[@jimmoriarty935]

Unfollow him, this way you hopefully won’t keep seeing stuff he’s posts / forgetting about him but no blocking him all together

[@vincentbos]

@Jim - Great advice!

[@JannNavarro09]

First! Your vids are always very timely, Vincent!

[@vincentbos]

You have been 'First' three videos in a row! Thank you for your support!!!

[@baggergurl16]

This video reminds me of a boy I dated back in high school about 20 years ago. Anyways, me and this boy dated for 2 months and one day as I was hugging him goodbye after school I felt him stick something in my back jeans pocket. When I pulled it out it was a break up letter. Anyways, fast forward 20 years later and we get in touch through Facebook. He told me that was a bone headed move on his part to break up with me the way he did and he told me that was his one regret about high school is how he broke up with me and how he fucked up any possible future he could have had together. What I’m trying to say with this post, is that your ex may not regret in a day, a week or even a months time that breaking up was a mistake all we got is time on our side and walking away from the relationship with our dignity.

[@xMikeyHardyx]

Hey Vincent, currently binging your content so I’ll love to smash this after work. Good day to you sir

[@vincentbos]

Thank you kind Sir Anthony, How are you feeling this Monday?

[@xMikeyHardyx]

@@vincentbos Good mate, thanks! Hope your day is going well! Been single 6 weeks so it’s nice to hear an English perspective on what’s happening.

[@vincentbos]

@@xMikeyHardyx thank you. Hopefully Boris will have some good news for us regarding how the next few months will be. The key is to stay positive in all situations. You are going through the early stages of a breakup and it likely feels very challenging right now, but I promise things will get easier. This summer could be the best ever!

[@xMikeyHardyx]

@@vincentbos I hope so mate! March 8th kids are back in school so that’s a huge stride forward 😁 yeaahhh, I know 🙄 I find comfort in your videos, I’m still in that mode of wanting her to come back atm. I hope you have an amazing summer and make up lost time with friends and family :) you’ve helped me immensely these past 6 weeks. Thank you.

[@vincentbos]

Thank you Anthony. This summer will hopefully be wonderful for everyone. If you keep moving forward with positivity you can have a fantastic summer yourself.

[@joyanew1974]

My ex-partner of 9 months who dumped me 1.5 weeks ago - expressing that 'I check so many of his boxes, but he doesn't want to progress in relationship with me, and still wants to be friends because I'm one of the most important people in his life' - just sent me a Christmas present and card saying he'll always be there for me no matter what form our relationship takes from here. I accepted his decision and have been in limited contact. How on earth am I to respond to this gift?

[@frecklesjones4643]

He just want to keep you around in case that other woman changes her mind.

[@lovelystarchild]

​@Freckles Jones truth.....she needs to cut ALL ties with him & move on because now he is just toying with her emotions.

[@jasonrichardson8012]

Another good podcast Vincent thanks jason

[@vincentbos]

Thank you very much Jason.

[@jasonrichardson8012]

@@vincentbos my ex sent me a message but was not for me it was for one of kids I said am guessing that was not for me an I got back lol from her I don’t know what too think of it?

[@vincentbos]

@@jasonrichardson8012 there is a chance it was an 'indirect, direct approach'. However, it could have been a legitimate mistake. If in doubt of what to do, the best suggestion is to leave things for now and to go back into NC. Her last message was incredibly short and there isn't much you can go back to her with at this point. You can try and grow a conversation from very little, but it can be risky if you aren't sure what to do for the best.

[@jasonrichardson8012]

@@vincentbos thanks for your advice much appreciated thanks again I am in not contact unless it is for the kids or she messages me

[@basicdose.9872]

Vincent is best coach.

[@vincentbos]

Thank you so much

[@mannybermudez3416]

Hey, Vincent!!! I love the timing of your vids. Can you make a video on taking your ex for granted and what you should do about it?

[@vincentbos]

Hi Manny, thanks for your lovely words. Here is a video that might help you - kzbin.info/www/bejne/eGXao4eYg8t9Z5o

[@mannybermudez3416]

@@vincentbos I watched this vid. It’s great, but I’ll watch it again to see if I missed anything!!!

[@vincentbos]

@@mannybermudez3416 you are very kind, thank you!

[@Giants143]

she reached out in NC and said “i thought we were going to be friends still..” even though i never agreed to a friendship 😂

[@vincentbos]

Hi Will, thanks for your update. How are you feeling today?

[@Giants143]

@@vincentbos pretty good at the moment, just confused at the moment Mr. Bos

[@vincentbos]

@@Giants143 I'm sorry to hear you are confused. What is making you feel this way?

[@Giants143]

@@vincentbos i don’t understand why she needs to cling on to me if she’s choosing to see other guys, it’s quite repulsive

[@vincentbos]

@@Giants143 she sees value in you, but sadly not in a romantic sense (at the moment).

[@NS-yj7sg]

What to do if an ex who came back is starting to act distant?

[@vincentbos]

It would depend on the exact situation. The main things to look at though would be your communication levels, whether dating mode is being implemented and whether you are showcasing any of the relationship killer traits.

[@Seren2010kinder]

Read up on attachment styles it really helped me understand my recent relationship and why she acts and I act in certain situations. She just maybe scared and her survival reaction is

[@Riffs88]

My ex would NEVER write me a letter lol.

[@vincentbos]

More of a texting person? Haha

[@Riffs88]

@@vincentbos I hope so lol I'm just trying to get past week 2 of NC 😭

[@BillRWare]

I feel you LOL!!! I've forgotten how to write. Doctors writing prescriptions have better handwriting than me...

[@Riffs88]

@@BillRWare o.O she never wrote and thank god that relationship ended! 100 times better now

[@corinnehiggins3968]

My ex wrote me a eight page letter as to why he didn't want us to be together. 😢

[@samhouse9143]

My son’s mom left me, moved back in with her parents and we are no longer in contact we contact about our child through who parents. She is mingling, going out, and seeing other people but she still checks and views my Instagram story. What could this mean?

[@vincentbos]

Hi Sam. Thanks for your question and I'm sorry to hear about your situation. It seems as though your ex still has some romantic, emotional attraction for you. However, this level is relatively low at the moment.

[@samhouse9143]

@@vincentbos Oh ok. But here’s the kicker...she doesn’t even follow me from the page she viewed mine from. Could that mean she’s stalking me or she just trying to see what I’ve been up to?

[@vincentbos]

Here is a video I think might help with this question - kzbin.info/www/bejne/iaKTf3euorGSftk

[@Himothy_xx]

Why is my ex still harassing me after 10 months? Ofc I don’t ever respond. Any ideas on why?

[@barbersmurff2592]

I actually thought there were going to be more of a psychological explanation for dumpers regret. But great content nonetheless

[@vincentbos]

Thank you very much :)

[@samboriboun2213]

I dont regret

[@chrisds3484]

6months broken off 4months no contact, yeah i dont think she regrets it

[@mrjjthor]

Sometimes it takes longer. However, maybe she moved on and you should too. The worst thing you can do is wait. Improve yourself and she'll notice when you least expect it. Who knows, by then you might not want her back. Lol.

[@chrisds3484]

@@mrjjthor i think she moved on and im on my road to do the same, going to therapy, reading self improvement and self love books, focus on my job

[@mrjjthor]

@@chrisds3484 if she moved on then she found someone more compatible for herself. Work on yourself and improve. If you do other women will notice you and even your ex will notice you afterwards.

[@chrisds3484]

@@mrjjthor thank you for your help, i guess she will never notice it, but fun fact sometimes her mother reacts on my instagram stories

[@mrjjthor]

@@chrisds3484 I guarantee she will notice. I have exes from years ago that sometimes ask about me either from a friend or family member. If they hear you're doing well financially and on top of your game they'll definitely be more fascinated, even jealous or angry that they let you go. Just don't check on her and keep yourself busy. If she does decide to reach out it'll be when you least expect it. If she sees you're still the same guy as before she'll tell herself she made the right choice. Leave her alone and concentrate on yourself but you have to do this for "YOURSELF" and not as an act to win her back. Women are great at detecting BS so if she senses it then there's no third chance, lol. Best of luck to you and hope you stay on your purpose. I've been down your path and just sharing my opinion and experiences. I'm married now and I tell my wife that if she's not happy then I'm not gonna hold her down. It's not what I want but I won't stop her. I show her that by having an abundance mindset she's replaceable but she's never left even if other women takes an interest in me. The thing is I'm always trying to learn new things, I have an abundance mindset, I have the ability to lead, I treat her well, check her when needed, financially stable, and have plenty of skill sets. I'm average looking at best and short at 5'5 but still have no issues finding someone new if I wanted to. If I was able improve on myself then so can you. Best of luck brother! 👍

[@face2799]

What if it wasn’t an official relationship but more of a situationship/almost relationship that lasted around 1 year

[@vincentbos]

Any type of intimate relationship will hold value in the mind of both people. Your ex will think of you and there is every chance that one day in the future they might want to contact you.

[@face2799]

@@vincentbos ok thank you, I’ve been a month into NC. She said she doesn’t have the feelings for me I deserve despite her previously showing very high interest and wanting to become more serious.

[@afshansiddiqui2417]

I literally think I have done lot of mistakes and I will not get my ex back it's been 3 months of no contact and I haven't heard from her now I am feeling hope less

[@vincentbos]

Stay positive, but move forward with your life taking one day at a time.

[@afshansiddiqui2417]

Can you please give me the video on how much time does it take for no contact to work please? You are really motivating me

[@vincentbos]

@@afshansiddiqui2417 thank you :) Listen to this whole playlist - kzbin.info/www/bejne/m3W8fGmnetaaask

[@afshansiddiqui2417]

@@vincentbos thank you so much

[@mamoud6648]

I'm The Dumper But I Want My Ex Back

[@vincentbos]

Hi Mamoud, I have replied to your email. Check your spam / junk if you don’t see it :)

[@mamoud6648]

@@vincentbos✨ Thank just emailed you backed:)

[@jazminfinch892]

He liked my Instagram pic

[@vincentbos]

That's positive, keep up the good work.

[@mickeyts5626]

You put me to sleep Hav u ever tried not repeating yourself

[@vincentbos]

I hope you had a nice sleep Mickey.

[@mothebarakuoane363]

Mickey what are you doing here?

[@mothebarakuoane363]

Mickey what are you doing here?

[@byronnelson8170]

So you are just straight up copying Coach Lee’s titles now?

[@vincentbos]

I have made over 350 podcasts and currently upload 3 a week. I have a lot of titles.

[@shareinator]

@@vincentbos LOL, but within a week or two of Coach Lee being the only one on KZbin doing that title, you do it? Come on. Stop copying other people.

[@vincentbos]

@@shareinator within a "week or two" I would have uploaded 6 podcasts. I cover a lot of ground, with a lot of titles.

[@Bucky1836]

@@vincentbos dont feed the trolls bud, you dont copy lee i watch yall both

[@vincentbos]

@@Bucky1836 thank you :)