Wholesome Ways To Enhance Autistic Life

Wholesome ways to enhance autistic life. Using comforting activities, mini routines and rhythms to build a life that is cosy and regulated.
As an autistic ADHD staying well regulated and at peace can be difficult. With physical disability in the mix it can feel like a constant battle to be OK. So I've been working on making small, positive changes which can impact my wellbeing and are sustainable. In this cosy video I'm talking about and showing some of these routines.
This is a video I made about trauma in case you'd like to hear more - • ADHD, Autism and Trauma
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[@emdarki]

Just wanted to quickly say I loved the way you edited this! It just felt so chilled and has left me feeling really positive. P.s as a serial loose leaf tea and matcha drinker, I 100% agree that the ritual of preparing the tea is so wholesome

[@otterwench]

So appreciative of your openess. I was diagnosed as autistic last year, age 58. I've been with a terrific therapist a few years now, who is a specialist in neurodivergence. I plan to start EMDR therapy next month. Adding the piece of past that is/was my autism has really helped reveal a path through all the trauma I've carried for decades. Artvhas always been an important part of my life, but it has become essential. It's a way for my subconscious to communicate with the rest of me, and often helps guide me to things that need a bit more attention.

[@harmonyhope1709]

Good for you xx

[@PurpleElla]

I would also like to try EMDR but I figured one step at a time, I hope that goes well for you.

[@otterwench]

@@PurpleElla thank you. It can go smoothly but I'm prepping as if/ in case it's gnarly. Making sure my anti anxiety meds are plentiful, having a plan in place in case suicidal thoughts seep in etc. I am lucky in that my husband totally gets it ( turns out he is autistic too. We've been together more than 20 years,stronger than ever)

[@peekaboo7424]

I’m 61 & struggling with finances & transportation to get my medical assessment. I’m glad you finally have your answer.

[@BadgerLord]

mini rhythms are rly good. as another with ADHD and ASD, having a rigid routine can be just as damaging as absolute chaos. I have a morning routine of coffee, precicely decaf. Lunch is KZbin (horror games) evening is games/films and night/bedtime is facecare

[@tazza19100]

Recently diagnosed with asd and awaiting adhd assessment, also a spoonie. Struggling massively with burn out and looking at ways to slow down a bit and listen to what I need. Started my day watching this over breakfast. Such a chill way to start the day with some relaxing positive talk from one of my favourite youtubers. Thank you x

[@Teef305]

Wish I could find the words to properly describe how much I loved and appreciate this video!! Just wow! Truly felt like getting advise from a friend that cares unlike all the "self-help" advise. Thank you for taking the time to make this! 💟💜

[@PurpleElla]

Thank you for taking the time to comment, I'm so glad you liked it as much as I loved making it

[@deborahlee8135]

Thank you. I've never felt comfortable with self-care things, as much as I love them, because I've felt i should be doing something else. I am coming to learn these are the things that I NEED to do to help my mind. I must make space for these 'rhythms' (there isn't a lot of rigid routine for me either, because any change is unbearable) I used 'pattern' but I like 'rhythm' as a better fit. I feel you've given me permission as silly as it may sound. Thank you.

[@helenm1085]

I really like rooibos (the easiest to find in Australian supermarkets is vanilla + rooibos) for a milky uncaffeinated tea. Even my partner who won't drink "leaf water" likes it 😂 (with lots of soy milk and sugar)

[@scottfw7169]

Re: "With physical disability in the mix it can feel like a constant battle to be OK.", now that is Truth!

[@wiegraf9009]

Stoicism is world denying. I had to put so much work into deprogramming it out of my head. It's very very hard to be in the world but separating yourself from it is even harder in the long run. There is beauty in really being in the world, even if it is so difficult.

[@MEOWalina]

just popping into the comments to say that i connect so much with your experiences and interests. i was diagnosed with, and have been obsessively researching about, ADHD for the last 5 years or so, and have recently been researching about ASD and it seems highly likely that i have both. thank you for sharing your experiences and knowledge. you feel like a kindred spirit, and i am also obsessed with tea! 😛

[@kasandraarthur9729]

Thank you for this. The ending, in particular, was exactly what I needed to hear. It helped, and now I'm going to take inspiration and try to be more comfortable taking care of myself. I hope that it gets easier for you, too. And that you continue to enjoy your matcha.

[@helenm1085]

I've got a new housemate who has some of these rituals and I've been finding myself emulating some of their good habits. This feels like a good time to try to set up some of these routines or rhythms in my rather unstructured days

[@sandralantau7395]

Thank you for sharing, Ella. I really appreciate how explained the difference between a rigid routine and having transitions and rhythms throughout the day

[@annamariafassio1799]

Purple Ella, I actually do the same book, and I have in the past two and a half years been diagnosed with ADHD, Eds and awaiting ASD diagnosis. You can‘t believe how much this hits home. Especially the part were you speak about building up trust to your therapist to talk about trauma.

[@harmonyhope1709]

Must try out some Matcha tea. I already drink chamomile tea In the evening as I know caffeine after a certain time prevents me from sleeping. Like the idea of puctuating your day with routines and rhythms. Also love lush bath bomb ❤️

[@giveemelle7862]

cheered at the intro, I love Bird & Blend omg. the Peach matcha is my fav... also really love the Brighton Rock mint tea they do, that's my concentration-mode tea! Thank you for 22:11... that's a really powerful sentiment

[@becomingmentallybalanced4141]

Wow, you just gave me some really helpful insight! My 16-year old daughter, who is on the spectrum, has a problem with getting anxiety when she goes to bed. I had no idea that it might be because her adrenaline from gaming or watching something funny on the computer is still in her body and makes her anxious instead. I will definitely suggest to her that she has some sort of evening ritual to help calm her down before going to bed. Thank you so much 💜

[@harmonyhope1709]

Wow interesting. Hadn't thought about experiences as being trauma related to the autism traits. I've done for trauma therapy for childhood trauma( CPTSD) This is interesting for me. Thank you for sharing your ideas to help cope with the difficulties ❤️ Happy Friday

[@murielbilly4296]

It's not easy to take care of myself, sometimes I just forgot I have needs... So thank you for your video, when you say we deserve it, I almost burst into tears because I have a really hard time for a few weeks and things look like it's going worse and worse, everything in the same time (ASD, EDS, CPTSD and severe depression). I needed to hear kind advices. And accept my limitations. So it's not bad or lazy if I can't do anything before 12am. I like when you use the word rythm, instead of routine. Around 12 am, my transition is some time on KZbin, and I can begin my day. And around 4 pm, I make some tea.I have a lot of different black or white teas. The ritual of choosing which tea, in which teapot (the one I bought in Norway, or in Hungary, .. they all have an history), in which cup... and I'm ready for one of my creative hobbies... 😊.

[@valdkynd]

I just realised that the rainbows in your wallpaper have the wrong order of colours, now I need to calm down...lol... Thanks so so much for sharing your transition methods and self-care routines!

[@HarrietFitzgerald580]

P.S. Congrats on the growing channel !! ;)

[@LouWeasley]

I loved this video so much! Particularly when you didn't stop yourself from stimming which was so joyful and inspiring to see for me as I'm working on trying to unmask more even when alone. Loved hearing about you researching all the teas in such detail as well which is something I can very much relate to! Just 10/10 vibes for this whole video

[@spotterofgold]

Ten out of five stars!! Thank you!

[@mathilda6763]

the video just started, but I like your overall. it's really colourful.

[@ratratte]

I should note that the "stop thinking about it" and "you don't try hard enough" approach DOES help for some people, for instance me! Naturally, it doesn't work for absolutely everybody, but you shouldn't write it off as something that doesn't ever help

[@MayaASDDID]

This approach my not help if advised loosely, of course if one hath a specific goal mind, it may hath positiv affects on life.

[@bee9678]

Such a valuable video, thank you! Definitely agree, sometimes the keeping going is what is getting in the way of taking stock of what we actually want and need. As an ex-bubble tea employee, can totally recommend jasmine Green tea if you haven't dabbled yet, soo good especially with soya milk. If you are looking to add an extra special pop add a splash of Elmlea cream (aldi)! Drinks shakers are the best for making instant iced teas. More relaxed tea videos pleaaase!!! 💕🍵 Totally here for that I always wanna hear about special interests in our community. Could even do a tea/art video, would be so nice to craft along with you! Thank you for being awesome 💜

[@kathybramley5609]

Hi! Last month I did February Album Writing Month & got quite het up with it - overstimulated really from hyperfocus on turning feelings into music but went into areas that I hadn't gotten to in all the Tweety poetic stuff and had similar kind of meltdown release. There's also a lot of parenting details and other things. Today I've written and read more poetry than I usually do, and do feel calm .

[@kathybramley5609]

I also made a random weave ball with vines yesterday!

[@enarose7062]

Thank you for sharing this with us. I wish you as much ease as possible in your processing journey 💜

[@annaw6630]

I’d be interested to learn about the intersection between ADHD and addiction. I’m an addict getting sober, living in a sober living at the moment, and also have ADHD. a lot of the other addicts here also have ADHD. This just got me thinking (:

[@PurpleElla]

Then perhaps this video I made about the link between ADHD and addiction might be helpful? kzbin.info/www/bejne/bpbUfqCsjrmai5I

[@redbirddeerjazz]

I think it’s all about dopamine

[@Barb15]

I started making chai tea. And loving it. I'm in South Africa so we don't get as huge a variety of teas as overseas.

[@absotivelypawsilutely796]

Your statement of encouragement was eerily accurate for where I'm at right now in life and what I'm trying to learn. I didn't really have my needs met throughout my life and felt like I had too much to deal with to trust myself to meet my own needs, but now I'm trying to work out how to do that because I'm the only person I really have and I need to look after myself. Maybe from there I can figure out a way forward for me that will make things better. It does help me to hear others (particularly neurodivergent people) who have had similar struggles with meeting their own needs reminding me that not only is it an option, but a good one that can be pursued in many ways. I also really appreciate the way you talk about things, it clicks for me because I speak in a fairly similar way, which makes me feel better about how I speak, it means that there are people who communicate like me. Thank you.

[@jenny2361]

I loved this video. The music and little relaxing demonstration scenes were so incredibly relaxing and peaceful. You've encouraged me to do some painting and listen to music tonight. I really found this helpful. Thank you 💗

[@alienor5619]

Loved this video so much! It was so relaxing to watch, and there is so much genuinely helpful advice. Thank you for sharing it with us!

[@ashmelville]

I really love this video

[@Sky-Child]

Lovely uplifting music (I am only at the start of the video Ella, I will comment again at the end)

[@Sky-Child]

Wow! What a lovely insightful honest video. Trauma therapy is hard, but you can do it and come out the other side and actually you will feel better. Love your little tea lecture and the rocking too. Embrace the stim! Take care Ella ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

[@WillVenusASMR]

Wow, you certainly seem a lot more zen. Chilled. I really enjoyed watching and listening - thanks for creating this ✨

[@autiemedic3885]

I think this is my favourite video of yours.

[@saschaeverrett109]

Thank you. That was such a lovely video. I cried at the end, with your words about self care. That really hit home 💜. Love your jimjams and thank you for sharing your cosiness ideas 🤗

[@invisible__design657]

have you checked out rare tea company? the owner has a very sweet and informative and personal and healing book named "infused"

[@PurpleElla]

I just took a look but couldn't find the book, thanks for the recommendation.

[@invisible__design657]

@@PurpleElla Infused: Adventures in Tea by Henrietta Lovell :)

[@melissa23347]

Love this! 💜

[@pariah2society]

Oh my gosh, thanks so much for this

[@rebeccaelle135]

Thank you!

[@alexagates]

Ugh! I really love this video because I liked that you were just rolling with where you were this day. Being on the internet has to be really challenging sometimes ❤ I also enjoyed it because you did stim and you did point out what was hard - this feels like representation to me as someone with ASD. Doing something all types of people do (being on KZbin) but in your own way and in however you present 💗💗💗

[@anabelle1508]

I’m addicted to green tea as well, it’s my way of transitioning and a moment for myself when the world around is too much. You made me smile when you said you spent hours researching on teas because I did the exact same thing. Food is very important too. Oh and matcha tea with spelt milk is my favorite. I mix match with milk (no water) and drink it cold or warm, it’s really good !

[@HarrietFitzgerald580]

Addressing the ''BIG'' stuff, man oh man, the hardest, but so worth it! I want to congratulate you, many people don't ever step up and do that; I feel like, probably from childhood really, we're taught to push aside the ''ugly'' feelings and experiences, which is completely unhealthy, but it becomes our normal default pattern of being, it can be so HARD to break that pattern, especially as we get older. Taking care of our inner child can and is so hard, especially for people who haven't been taught how to do so or weren't even properly cared for as children themselves...and then as parents, wow, we can find ourselves having to parent ourselves as well as our kids and it can be so scary. Feeling those emotions ARE a full-time job, how do people do it?! I wonder...I think maybe for people who've gone through trauma and not truly dealt with it, we're stuck in a flight or fight mode...it is odd and uncomfortable and can feel unnatural to stop and change our thought patterns...because yeah, how can I control what I'm thinking? Or, how can I detact myself enough to change a thought, without it becoming repressing a thought/feeling?? Do I appreciate this brain/mind that I've been given...good point/question...I am undiagnosed, but highly, highly relate to ASD and now wondering about ADD too, as I do tend to be quite scatter-brained...do I need someone external to validate my internal struggles? Do I not know what I struggle with?? How can I help myself? I also love how you are moving away from negative thinking and not hating on yourself for coping in the ways you used to, now you are moving away from it and hopefully are on a better path, i.e. drinking tea, I love that!! I've actually, quite by accident, have stumbled into a nightly evening routine involving a cup of tea (black or green) and some chocolate and it has been heavenly! I strive to make myself some during the day sometimes, but it rarely works out (always being swept away into doing something else, especially with the kiddos around) and so that nighttime wind down moment, just taking some time for me, the ritual, habitual aspect to it as well, it is really nourishing to the soul! (And what better way to spend your time then by researching and buying tea?) I loved your matcha tea fun facts! I've been drinking this in the past few evenings! Love the idea of rhythms in a day. Trying to establish mine, but things are constantly shifting (life with little ones); if that's something you ever want to talk about/share, motherhood in the early years (were you diagnosed, how did you handle motherhood then vs. now, etc.), would totally be interested in that!! Love me a good bath! Need to somehow work this back into my days/evenings! Oh Purple Ella, how I have enjoyed this video!!! :D So glad that you made it and that I watched it all!! HUGS !!

[@nataliamartinez6834]

Aahhhh 😌yesss the power of tea ❤❤️❤️☕️🍵🫖🧋🧉💕💕💕 I can, and have, drink tea aaalll day ✨✨✨

[@Autisticheather]

I very much enjoyed this video

[@peekaboo7424]

The daily stoic journal. Is that by Ryan Holiday?

[@tom-leeallinnediego6903]

thank you

[@Toizia]

Have you tried liquorice tea? Its naturally very sweet with no need for sugar. I love to mix my matcha with a liquorice tea. Then use that teabag with cold water, to make a subtly sweetened liquorice tea water for after. Liquorice tea also goes lovely with lots of other flavours. I too am obsessed with tea, liquorice and camomile being my all time favourites. I like oat milk and honey in my camomile. I too have a morning matcha I recently incorporated. I have to now try the blue pea matcha! Iv been meaning to try blue pea flower for a while!! I will get some and mix with my matcha, thankyou for reminding me! X

[@PurpleElla]

Unfortunately I really do not like the taste of liquorice.

[@BilliesCraftRoom]

Love you and your channel, just a heads up about green tea and medications. 🚩It's worth checking with pharmacy and your medication into sheet to find out if green tea is something that would negatively interact with them. Not everything plays nicely together. Much respect and love Ella, love u n not disrespecting you in anyway ❤

[@merrymerrymead7749]

A lovely video. I must look into matcha.

[@thatrunningirl]

Really invaluable video Ella x How did you find a neurodivergent therapist? I'm in Oxfordshire and really struggling to find anyone good x

[@BadgerLord]

that whole numbing of emotions.. I think thats something I need to work on. I only found out last year that im Autistic. Pair that with the emotional whirlwind of EUPD and ADHD, it can be hard to deal with the constant swinging of emotions at max level. Distraction.. or rather, escapism has been my go to for a long time. Even though ive just learnt to unmask and understand, it can be hard to have more than 1 emotion a day for me. I attend DBT, which is great.. but I was put there due to EUPD and not autism, so I find the group work a bit more difficult than some

[@leslieyancey5084]

There’s something so comforting in having a good cup of tea! I love matcha lattes! Another favorite of mine is ginger root tea brewed with cinnamon sticks.

[@jmaessen3531]

Hehe! Can we make tshirts that say "proper hippy?" 😂 It feels like an oxymoron to me (edit: typo) for some reason. This video is a huge help, thank you! ❤

[@scottfw7169]

Re: "Where have I traded away freedom and how can I get it back", ... hmm, so, how does that work with a trade which was not voluntary, such as acquiring chronic mitochondrial and neurological autoimmune diseases? Actually, the thing seems more like a pirate raid and vandalism than trade.

[@amberdiane4486]

❤️

[@imchuckiewannacrochet]

You explained the stoicism part really well actually. I’m so glad you reminded me how much I loved that philosophy in my undergrad. Stoicism suits the autistic mind really well. Glad you and mr purple are enjoying it

[@iquestionexistence8730]

[@lenberry6721]

I think this is my favourite video of yours.