Why Does the Narcissist Stop You Socialising?

[@nopereradicator]

Happy hour with coworkers. Brunch with girlfriends. Thrifting with my sister. Window shopping with my mother. Concerts. Girls weekend getaway….😩 This conversation was had a million times. I’m so glad I escaped.

[@kr8882]

This was when my father was the biggest of A holes. Taking the car keys to prevent my mother from visiting my grandmother. Refusing to drop or pick me up for nights out. Imposing a time limit of 23:00, when I was an adult with a full time job. Locking me out. Not allowing phone calls from friends. Orchestrating chores that I had to do before I was allowed to go, only for it to take so long that it prevented me from going.

[@cassanovana]

That is insanity run amok. My heart goes to victims. ❤

[@loriwong6173]

My mother has been living in a skilled nursing facility for1 1/2 years. My father lives in a senior apartment in the same complex. He used to visit her every day from 10 until 12 and again from 2 until 4:30 when he would go back to eat lunch and dinner respectively. She manipulated him into coming from 10:45 until 6:00 p.m. every day for the last 14 months. He is no longer "allowed" in the communal dining room as he might speak to other people, so he picks up his dinner in a tray and re-heats it every night. She usually calls him 6 times a day and nearly every night she has a "crisis" and talks him into coming over at 8:30 p.m. so he cannot work on his hobbies or have any downtime. She complained to me today that he doesn't come over early enough, so I am sure in a few days he will be going over an hour earlier. For Christmas this year, the whole family was going to meet at my dad's apartment and visit. We were to wheel her over and wheel her back in a few hours. It is not going to work out, so my immediate family is going to visit in her room and my Sister-in-law has invited us and my dad over afterward to visit and see the grandchildren/great grandchildren. I let him know of these plans and he e-mailed me back telling me he couldn't go. She would be upset if she were "left out". mind you, we get together only once or twice per year now. I could put a pillow over her face!!!😡

[@Pony-t9v]

I just got no end of silent treatments …. then he would arrange to be away on business… more and more…

[@heyo-faerie]

My “stepfather”’s very thin semi-façade meant other people noticed how caveman-like he actually was pretty quick… he became convinced their friends and acquaintances were always talking crap about him every time they saw him “for no reason.” So he convinced my physically disabled mother - at that point who could no longer work - to basically never go out the few chances she felt well enough to. This was her downfall, because he made her so disinterested that she didn’t even want to visit my grandmother and uncle anymore. So when he later on caught COVID, she wouldn’t listen to me to go stay with my grandmother. She just couldn’t be without him, and I blame the severe social isolation he encouraged for that. He would also constantly call her while he was at work and ask her if she was talking to another man. Kind of a compliment that he knew she was a catch even if she was hooked to an oxygen concentrator. But she barely left the house at that point, dumb f()ck. Plus she was extremely loyal, so it made no sense to keep asking her that. Meanwhile, he was probably doing what he accused her of but failed at an attempted work affair since he was barbaric and paranoid there too. 😅

[@katiemulcahy1]

HG, when ever you play the ladies part, it reminds me of Ashleigh and Wynne. Very entertaining as usual!

[@marigoann2755]

This reminds me of when my narcissist parent got jealous of me spending time with friends, and "forgot" that I said in advance that I was going on a trip or going out.

[@Joa5588]

I can't imagine anyone daring to talk to me like that. This would have the opposite, direct effect. As well as it would increase the distance in the long run. It was hard for me to even listen to it. The woman's reactions were disastrous. However, I easily succumb to "positive" methods.

[@Pony-t9v]

Excellent example ❤

[@SqueakyWheelie]

So like my ex. Thank you, very validating.

[@moniquepeerboom2196]

because they always think that you are cheating like they do! 😉

[@ihdtdd]

I'd dress in muted colours, nothing flattering and I'd put my make up on in the car, just to meet friends and keep his thoughts calm before I left. When you are micromanage you'll loose friends, it inhibit your personal growth, you lose networking and other opportunities, finally, your accumulated wealth will decrease, just to think of a few things.

[@Tekay37]

About the "I hate you!" exclamation. What happens if you call that person a liar in response? Do they double down on saying that they hate you? What happens if you use the exclamation to say "Well, if you hate me right now, then it's better if I leave until you don't hate me anymore." or something similar?

[@davidarundel6187]

I have a neighbour , as you described . They didn't like being "sprung " and developed an almost instant hatred , towards my , for no reason , other than stated . I've heard those words from them , when they "leaked " their delusional thoughts and supposed hatred . Suits me , as its one less narcassist , to deal with .

[@Pony-t9v]

I never had a girls night out …. but l did go to fellowship meetings at my church ⛪️ that was difficult enough he moaned about baby sitting his own children… that were in bed … l insisted that l needed to go to this meeting to grow and develop my faith … you should be encouraging me … he was jealous of Jesus 😂

[@reneegardner2286]

The abuse makes you agoraphobic