Why I Stopped Charting While Trying To Get Pregnant

I have a confession to make. Four months into TTC I stopped charting my cycle. Today I share why we made that decision and how my knowledge of FAM carried me through. Enjoy!
Chart Your Cycle | bit.ly/2iI2DFk
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[@brionnawelsh9740]

I used a fertility app to help me conceive and I got pregnant the second cycle after we started trying!

[@Liv-kr1yl]

YOUR HAIR LOOKS AMAZING!!

[@Liannabelle8]

It's nice to hear someone talk about removing the stress of charting and tracking every step. It takes the joy out of TTC and intimacy with your partner. We've been TTC for 3 years, 1 ectopic and I'm finally at the point where I know we're healthy, my remaining fallopian tube is clear and when it happens, it happens. No worries or stress. Congratulations on your pregnancy! Ps I don't know how I never noticed before but you look a lot like the lady who plays Piper Chapman on orange is the new black!

[@FemmeHead]

Thank you, and I'm happy to hear you've found a good place with TTC. And I get Piper a lot!

[@mirandanatalia572]

Thank you for sharing! As one of the many people who asked about this, I so appreciate that you made a video about it. I also have always loved your honesty, so a special thank you for that!

[@FemmeHead]

You are so welcome!

[@MaayanLovesUnicorns1]

I just found out I’m 5 weeks pregnant a few days ago and am SO excited to follow this journey with you! I actually had a period tracker I would use to track my ovulation and as soon as I deleted it and let nature take its course I got pregnant! I am SO excited for you and can not wait to watch you grow as a momma!

[@FemmeHead]

Congrats! That's so exciting. I love learning about all the mama to be's in this journey with me.

[@MaayanLovesUnicorns1]

FemmeHead thank you ❤️❤️

[@Yeodoongiiie]

i am still just so happy for you! :) - Grey is a nice color on you.

[@wendywarner5636]

I was looking for something like this!! We have been trying to conceive since November last year. I didn t use a chart and track app then, i downloaded one in February, didn t temp then it was just to roughly track my cycle then (even though i was already super regular) and i became pregnant that month. Unfortunately, I had a miscarriage at around 6 weeks ( i really felt pregnant and absolutely loved it!) and that s when the obsessive brain took over, i really wanted to get pregnant again as soon as possible, from then i started to chart like crazy, BBT, scheduling, using OPK, spending so much time online researching etc ... in a matter of a few cycles, i became a chart expert! I changed a lot of my habits as well, i was a pretty healthy person but i think i pushed it too far, zero caffeine, zero alcohol, i did a lot of research on supplement and vitamins and take quite a few of them now, i m watching what i m eating way more than i used to etc ... I think it s a basic need of trying to have control over something i have absolutely no control over. (i m 36 years old so... the fear of this conception taking too long and for time running out is kind of freaking me out) i have been doing this until now and i think i m going to stop. Every cycle i m obsessing with these temperatures after ovulation, analysing any rise and dip, obsessing with any symptoms that are different from the previous month ( my body seems to play with me as well, bringing different PMS symptoms every month) which, every time Miss Flo showed up lead to me feeling very upset, feeling like i m failing. Today Miss flo arrived again when i really thought this time was the one! ( i was one day late with no cramps, i m never ever even a few hours late) my temps were ''perfect'' since ovulation and ... no. So this is it, this month i will leave the thermometer away, the OPK kit too and i m just going to enjoy life for a bit! I need to stop being so obsessive and live! I need to stop wishing these 2 weeks wait away, wishing these 7-9 days before fertility window away and just be! I m full of it now but i know it won t be easy for me to quit controlling life ahahah i m having a nice caramel latte right now, after 3 months without any and ....oh it does feel good! lol Anyway, that s it for the novel wish me luck in my new more freedom less control freak me life :)

[@ericagoehring1089]

That was basically my approach as well. We had been using NFP for three years before trying for a baby. Once we were TTC, I simply made a note of increased cervical fluid and timed things accordingly. We have 5 healthy children and never a surprise in 17 years of only NFP.

[@FemmeHead]

Awesome! Thanks for sharing your story of success with NFP!

[@NoellVidaurri]

I was hoping you would make a video on this topic! I am exactly where you were with not wanting to chart anymore because it starts to feel like work. I was becoming obsessed and had my emotions wrapped up in the whole thing. Still TTC!

[@FemmeHead]

The knowledge I gained from charting was so helpful, but at a certain point it was just better emotionally for me to take a break.

[@marieh5567]

I have Vulvodynia & prior to having my son sex was so painful that I couldn't do it often. I started charting both to see if I was even fertile after years of irregular cycles & also so that we could concentrate on the days before ovulation. It took 2.5 years to make our son & I became obsessive about charting & symptom spotting. Infertility & charting took over my life. Now we're trying again & I'm keeping track of my cycle & some basic symptoms but as I'm still breastfeeding & up at night I'm not temping & properly charting at this time. It feels much more easy this time around. Although it's hard to get out of that obsessively trying mindset.

[@fabilanz6851]

Thank you for sharing :) I just wanna say the 25% chance is just if you do not have any problems. If you have Endometriosis (10% of women do have it) for example the chances of conceiving is 1-5% each month. Treating endometriosis takes some time and it can always come back. So if you have trouble conceiving and if you are in a lot of pain while you have your period, you might have endometriosis.

[@lucypovey2972]

I also stopped charting, more so because I drove myself a little crazy the first cycle I had where we started taking known risks. At that point it was supposed to be a 'we'll just see what happens' kind of cycle rather than full in trying to concieve. I was taken by complete surprise once I got into my luteal phase and started obsessing over if I had got pregnant or not - I took about 6 tests from about day 7 of my LP and then got really disappointed when it didn't happen. I guess it was the moment I realised how much I wanted to get pregnant which was cool but I also realised I wasn't cut out for the whole 'two week wait' part of charting while TTC. Just checking for EW was the perfect way to proceed for me and relax about it all.

[@VamptasticGurl]

I relate to this so much! I don't chart with temps, just my apps (which I know are rarely accurate, though I always have a 28 day cycle) and my husband and I aren't officially trying. We have unprotected sex but withdraw during what I guess to be my fertile window. I'm driving myself crazy because we would be elated if we got pregnant "accidentally" so every month in my luteal phase I wonder and hope that I'm pregnant. I think I know too much about fertility and I'll never be one of those women who just lets it all go lol. So you don't chart anything at all? Do you use any form of birth control? sorry for the questions, just havent read a similar story to mine!

[@lucypovey2972]

Emily Roth your method sounds really similar to mine, i would still use kindara but basically just put in my period and egg white. Also used to use withdrawal like you but then stopped all together. I think it really helped to go to that next step of having unprotected sex in the fertile window without obsessing each time because we convinced ourselves it could take a while after it not happening a few times. Getting familiar with the very real truth that even well timed intercourse is not 99% chance to concieve like i had thought before really helped me switch from thinking 'i'm probably pregnant' to 'nah - it probably won't happen yet, it's only been X months'. Admittedly we also had his history to help with that - it took him and his previous partner a year to concieve. I always put this down to her having come off the pill, but i managed to recognise it would have been both of them not just her! We traditionally put all the responsibility onto women...

[@sheem.2450]

😭😭😭😭 We've been trying for a while now. Its been hard. And I know exactly what you mean when you said "I was so focused on trying not to get pregnant... Maybe getting pregnant should be easy?" I've had that thought too. 😥😥😥😥 Its so emotional. 😞

[@abbyglassgow3072]

Same here! Isn't it weird how you stress about "Oh man, did I get pregnant this cycle?" if you feel a little different when TTA, but once you're actively TTC you look back and are like, "Yeah. I had nothing to worry about. This is so much harder than it looks." Thinking of your and hope you get your BFP soon!

[@prcusenprnces]

You look so beautiful in this video! You always look beautiful but you definitely have a pregnancy glow here!

[@FemmeHead]

Aw thanks 😘

[@brittanygancarz2475]

I stopped charting too!! I got pregnant with my miscarriage the first month (while charting). After our miscarriage, charting just made me too nutty. Like you, I remained aware (“Hey, look, egg white CM!”) Now I’m almost 35 weeks! We all need to do what’s best for us, right?

[@FemmeHead]

Congrats on your soon to be little one!

[@katelynndasilva7532]

I haven’t formally ever charted but I’ve always had a good understanding of my cycle and did track my periods on the Flo app, so I had a general idea of fertility and ovulation windows. We decided to not try but to not prevent to relieve stress and pressure and it worked very well for us. I don’t like the idea of making sex a formality. I am curious why you haven’t started taking your temperature again now that you’re pregnant. Do you feel it’s not necessary? I think it could be interesting to see how your temperature may have changed since conceiving.

[@iamalexandra.]

Your temperatures don't change when you're pregnant, they just stay high because you stay in your luteal phase until you give birth. Some women like to temp throughout their pregnancy because a temp dip can mean you're going to have a miscarriage, and so, you can prevent it by seeing a doctor right away. However, you can have a temp dip without it being related to that, which causes unnecessary stress, so many women stop temping to avoid that.

[@kookiepooh]

We got pregnant on our first try 😭 I swore that it would take us a few times. I got implantation dip and really really good quality EWCF during luteal phase. I knew I was pregnant. I took early detection pregnant test 10 days into the luteal phase and got positive! 34 weeks pregnant now.

[@fuzzles93]

I’m worried that if I stopped then I won’t be able to have enough info if I need to bring it to the doctor after 12 months of trying.

[@FemmeHead]

That's a valid point! In the end you have to do what's best for you. And if you're planning that doctors visit in advance I can see wanting to have as much info as possible for them to give you some answers.

[@iamalexandra.]

I've seen several women on Kindara get pregnant after taking a relaxed approach to charting!

[@mrsbj322]

Got pregnant naturally 11 times (10 died....recurrent miscarriage), never charted, just did slippery toilet paper test....after wee, rub paper with thumb, when slippery, even when you cannot see it, the sex day!

[@mrsbj322]

oh, yeah, and sex about six to eight times a cycle when slippery.

[@iamalexandra.]

Actually, you should wipe before you pee, since as soon as you do, it'll change the way your cervical fluid looks / feels. Not many women know this, but miscarriages are usually due to a progesterone deficiency. Just sharing in case it might help!

[@samudrachathuranga]

:)