WHY THE INFJ "REALITY BREAK" IS A BLESSING IN DISGUISE

[@Wenzes]

Have you experienced some kind of "reality break" that made you change your perspective in a major way?

[@BeholdIamaNewCreation]

For sure, I didn’t know what was happening, but I knew it was a very core spiritual and mental experience. The delusions were heartbreaking in a way, because of how much they tied to me childhood trauma. But now I’ve come full circle. Your channel has helped. But I manifested it. When the student is ready the teacher appears. Anyway, thanks Wenzes for your career shift and work to give back to yourself and others. I feel the shift back into reality. Putting myself in situations to expand again. But on my terms.

[@chrisrestifo7010]

Oh you betcha! After a 30 year relationship, I discovered things were not what they appeared to be. Mostly my own fault for putting on a pedestal someone who is only human! I thought I was " it" in their eyes. Yet the reality wasn't in line with my impression! Heartbreaking for sure. So much of an investment of my heart and soul. Definitely a learning experience! As bad as it was, my feetare planted firmly on the ground, and yes life goes on. Going forward, I will be investing more so in my own interests and pursuit of happiness.

[@MegaCyberleader]

NO, I like to take breaks from reality via the use of anime. Ever Heard of Super Crooks? :)

[@isabelferreiraalves6732]

Yes!! :) Thank you so much, this was really important to have a bigger perspective of how it works. And your hair looks beautiful :)

[@simovtransportmedia1137]

INFJ reality break is a mechanism for alignment of our inner and the outer reality, that is obviouse. The question is can it be not such painfull. It's about mindfullness I think. You got to know that you are susceptible of living in an introverted intuitive shell and you need to know from where you are locking yourself in this shell. The way you can do it is by aligning your introverted and extroverted function's so you can be intuned with your self, but don't be such closed in so you can gain power from your presence in society or in a concrete group. I know about myself that my inner psychological demons haunt me when I'm closed in my introverted shell. You need to go out and talk with someone that can show you his/her perspective of the situation.

[@aniokay]

Going through therapi is nothing but reality breaks if you've been raised in a dysfunctional family, where you have been forced to dissociate from your everyday life for decades. The reality breaking point is brutal, but the clarity you see afterwards is just magical/pure bliss.

[@skyhawk00787]

My reality break came a few months back. As an INFJ, for most of my life, I've been surrounded by people who've told me about how I need to alter my personality in some way - like how I need to smile more (too serious), how I need to speak up more (too quiet), etc. - in order to exhibit more archetypal proper behavior by societal standards. As a person who has a lot of empathy, I've always tried to be diplomatic and decent to others; the last thing I'd want is to make people around me feel bad or uncomfortable, and I'd feel horrible if I accidently did. However, after having SO MANY negative experiences with toxic people - along with my extensive solitude that I've had over the past year - I've come to embrace myself for who I am. I've come to the realization that I was practically meant to be a lone wolf. Even as a kid, I was often referred to as an "old soul." I'm still decent to people, and I certainly help them if I can, but I put my own needs and wants first and foremost. I also will NEVER again apologize, or feel ashamed, for having this personality. I understand that, for many people, the reality break can be difficult. However, it's easier when you realize that the toxicity is NOT coming from within you, it's being forced upon you by others, and you reach a point that you simply refuse to take it. This helps greatly in achieving optimal self-awareness, and you ultimately realize a sense of confidence that you never knew you had. Now, I couldn't be prouder of who I am! It may be more difficult to see in the darkness, but it's the LIGHT that ultimately blinds you. Don't rely on the proverbial light of "normality" to guide your way. Instead, step into the dark side and guide your OWN WAY!

[@lindateuling7862]

Skyhawk, I 100% hear what you're saying. I've had people tell me the same stuff you've mentioned here. I have a social side, but I tire easily, so I know what it's like to need to have serious time alone. It sounds like you're making some good choices, and I'm sure you'll do well. It sounds like you already are

[@HaleyMary]

I'm very much an introvert and a loner and I've been told that I seem too serious. I was telling one of my subscribers that I did comedy at open mic nights and he said that I seemed too serious to be a comedian. The reason they never saw that side of me was because I didn't share their sense of humor which was gross and uncomfortable bordering on harassment most of the time and I like more light hearted sitcom like comedy. I'm serious when the situation calls for it, but for the most part I wouldn't consider myself a serious person. I'm more easy going. It all depends on the situation.

[@celticcook3950]

Thank you for your soul penetrating message.

[@Ela29653]

I feel the same way. I only try to have good intentions with people and situations, but I keep experiencing that I don't quite fit in, and after trying to fit in for so long and feeling like it never works, I have stopped trying to fit in. This way, if you get rejection as you are being yourself, it's easier to know it's about the other person, not yourself.

[@joshuaanzalone2060]

Yes indeed I'm awoke now and I'll never look back

[@leonorabrandscheit]

for me it's about cutting people out of my life and not doing everything for everyone else, but only for myself. thats not so difficult if you get really betrayed. your videos help me with that soo much💚

[@jmonie02]

Yea. It's keeps happening. These are God's children. Rely on him and he will cut out all theme bad apples. It's free choice.

[@veyronpc]

I had a reality break a day for 6 months because i was waiting for something i had to watch unfold, and it didnt't and will not, now im confortable with that and im feeling an alien, no one can touch me anymore

[@leonorabrandscheit]

perfect timing. anyone who goes through that, feel hugged, even when you really don't want to💚

[@aniokay]

Brilliant, brilliant way of expressing what Fe is! I have been so adverse to claiming Fe because it for me has been synonemous with people pleasing and masking, which is a horribly suppressing path to continue down at when you have been forced into that role your entire life (whether I'm an INFJ or not, I have developed a crazy Fe due to my upbringing).

[@Betscu.]

Yes. We are diamonds in making.

[@cherylclough1804]

Do not underestimate or ignore the mama bear trait. Lots of souls want to co-opt us to make big money and sell out on principles. Mama bears are not just obsessed about how much power and influence they can survive. They are worried about if they and their babies can survive the current season and beyond.

[@achebwahs1111]

Was caught in the fog of an abusive narcissistic relationship for 10 years. Upon reflection I know that I was making excuses for their behaviours. Trying to convince myself that they were a result of deep-rooted past trauma and that it was my life mission to help them overcome their demons. There were numerous times I chose to ignore what was happening, as I knew I was strong emotionally and hung onto what was clearly just a notion that I could fix it all. So many lessons learnt about me and a genuine shift in how I perceive reality. Much love to all

[@kimkeck6266]

Me too for 40 years my dear!! 🌷🙏😳🥴😔

[@achebwahs1111]

@@kimkeck6266 That's a big sentence. Very pleased that you are there no longer. Much love 🙏💚💛💜

[@bladeguru6358]

Congratulations! It’s been about 20 years since my breakthrough! 💕

[@kimkeck6266]

@@achebwahs1111 thank you very much! I also had no idea that I am an INFJ-T, HSP, empath and Cancer sign! I knew something was very wrong at the beginning BUT I was already stuck and did not know what it was...he stole my intuition. Scott Morgan has a video about the INFJ/empath that explains perfectly the "dance" between the narcissist and the empath. He too is an INFJ and a counselor. He is very hard to watch BECAUSE he speaks very slowly. I feel it is because he is such an INFJ that he is shy and reserved. I am an introvert however I do not have a shy bone in my body AND I am not afraid to speak my mind to anyone when I am upset!! Read Pyschopath Free by Jackson McKenzie (?). It is an easy read and was the first of many to educate me on all things narcissistic! 🌷🙏🥰❤️‍🩹💪

[@achebwahs1111]

@@kimkeck6266 Hey Kim, Thank you for sharing and for your recommendations. I too am an introvert but like yourself far from shy. I have learned to navigate and operate effectively within many different dynamics and do so with my moral fibre in tact. I can step in and out of the energy of confrontation without wearing attachments, but It never is a natural or comfortable place for me to exist. I'll process all angles and potential outcomes of a cicumstance and sometimes I know it to be the only effective option. I will commit and do so without hesitation and always in a controlled manner. I will often feel ill following the experience as these behaviors are environmental adaptations rather than innately human.

[@alitariq5786]

Happened with me a month ago. Because of reality break, I didn’t know what to do and never felt so lost. Understood everything, analysed it. Getting better each day.

[@cinderling5472]

My gosh, my lady. I have no idea how you do this - but you look into my heart and soul, saying EXACTLY what i personally needed to hear... It's more than i could ever ask for from a free KZbin video. I'm currently going through an excruciating reality break. Yesterday i was full of resolve to take action, and today I've fully dissociated, overwhelmed by doubt. However, you've given me some much needed faith. I'm very terrified... But I'll just watch your videos again and again until i no longer am. Thank You 💖💖💖🙏

[@terrijamison9154]

Yes we are strong. My ESTP spouse has told me more than once that I am the strongest person he knows.

[@anthonyr6286]

That comment about going to the movies and not caring about what it is... So true with so many things

[@KibatheMalinois]

Yip, devastating is the perfect word for my first reality break, that was about 10 years ago, it really hit me hard. That one was a toughie because home, work and family were all connected and it left me with depression, anxiety and a bit of PTSD because I literally flash backed all the traumatic moments. It took me 2 or 3 years to fully recover from that one but in that 2 or 3 years I started going to the gym and fixing certain other aspects of my life that I was neglecting hoping that the next time I'd make it through better not realizing that I was surrounded by toxic people in my life which led to the second and I took that one way better I think but it still hit hard realizing that I could not change the mindset of the people around me. I think my Ni might have still been under developed at this stage but it still worked. Best part is the more reality breaks you have the quicker you get over them. I went from years to months(this was last year), weeks and now it seems like only a few days sometimes. Nowadays I just look for certain behaviors or signs from the situation, the people, how they react and I can sort of predict that this is not going to work so it makes me face the truth then and there, deal with it and move on to the next step on my own. Every days a struggle but ya gotta roll on right.

[@joshuaanzalone2060]

Yes now that I know I'm a lone wolf I embrace it

[@mr.goodwrench8273]

Have I experienced some kind of "reality break" that made me change my perspective in a major way? Yes. I once worked for a company at a nearby regional airport. I had been there for 5 & 1/2 years. During that time, I realized I was in a really dysfunctional & toxic work atmosphere. I needed out. Once I found a position as a mechanic with the public school system, I was gone from that company and those people, and I never looked back. A small time later, that company folded and sold out to a larger company, and it was poetic justice for me. I have excelled since then. My perspective changed once I learned from observing how people manage other people. I found a better opportunity and those people missed me after I left. After I was taken for granted, I have never felt like taking anyone for granted.

[@KarolHofman]

Really inspiring as I'm faceing something similar now. 6 months ago I realised that people use me and take for granted, until I spoke up. I had a reality break that the company is not caring about people at all, and the decisions are made without considering people's psychical wellbeing. I want to leave but I don't have a plan where to go, with the fear of landing in a worse place. Any advice how to break that fear?

[@mr.goodwrench8273]

@@KarolHofman While there is still some time, and you have some resources, and motivation to move onto better things, you must make this move quietly without speaking to anyone about it. Your silence is your best weapon to fight your way out of there. Believe me. If they find out you are trying to leave, they will do anything to hamper your efforts to do so. Using sick days to for interviews with potential employers is something I did. Also, taking any off-duty education in order to get set up with your next employer. A small sacrifice to get a better payoff. I did that too. I hope this helps. Godspeed my friend.

[@aniokay]

It is through pressure PLUS healing that 'diamonds' are created ❤

[@lindateuling7862]

I especially appreciated your emphasis on zeroing in on our extroverted functions (Fe & Se) when being a game changer. It reminded me of a reality break I had when, even though I liked my work, my living situation was getting emotionally draining - lots of criticism, social and spiritual pressure. At that time I definitely used Fe and Se - and mostly to make some communication changes in how I worded things and adopting an "own it" attitude which I chose to show and not tell. (It took a lot of self examination and rethinking; I did a lot of reading, journaling and writing out my thoughts and plans.) I ended up moving out, and things did work out for the better. It's been my experience that I have had to have several game changing experiences along the way. I learned from the first one, but things always would come up in the next situation that perhaps needed something different from what I had learned previously. But having the experience taught me that it's okay to have to do game changing once in awhile, and we can learn what needs to be done by drawing from what we acquired from previous experiences.

[@faysmith7248]

What the actual...? Going through this rights now. I have PTSD, cognitive dissonance, and wierd PTSD dreams. So often have to pinch myself. Luckily I don't stay in it long. I have to hide until I've figured stuff out. Thanks good timing.

[@doubleambition5211]

Had a rough reality break for 2-3 months now due to our stubborn mind, and it honestly feels like I've been ignoring it. But I've learnt things and gotten better. But a lot of things have struck me recently all in one go, confronting my truths I grew with. And breaking out to see another way is getting better, but it still makes me feel rather vulnerable and low. I'm still trying but I've hit a rather big reality break that feels like it's been going on for too long. I'm just lost on ideas.. but I've adopted self care right now. Other than that.. I feel screwed.

[@cinderling5472]

Hugs to you fellow wayward soul. Trust that it will get better 💖🙏

[@TroyPosey]

Absolutely. But my break was from negative things happening in my life, my life was falling apart, friendships, work, me… 😂 I discovered my twin flame and something inside of me instantly got triggered, and I suddenly knew what I wanted out of life. Granted, 5 years later, and we’re still not together, and it’s been a really rough ride, but I have learned to appreciate the journey, and still hope for the outcome I want. And from that point, the awakening and small steps started moving forward. It’s been the best thing that’s ever happened to me. It helped me learn my boundaries with toxic people, find my worth, stand up for myself, my thoughts, my opinions, and to validate myself and my place in this world. A lot of these really big changes happened once I discovered I was an INFJ, and then found your videos. It’s been absolutely invaluable towards my growth. Thank you Wenzes! 😊❤️

[@TylerTheMonk]

Sri & Kira talk about this stuff a lot. Super relatable.

[@wildforest6851]

heheh I love how you framed that our dissociative state actually DOES help us and that we gain strength from it I am having 3 interviews in the following days and they are interviews all in different fields, which is something new altogether. But I definitely have been thinking lately about this, and the fact that now I will soon start in one of these fields and to - when that happens- start living more in the real physical world, accepting reality. But it definitely is good to know that our "addiction"/ bad habit actually will play an important and positive role for us for when we decide to start creating the changes and life that we want. Nice reminder

[@jadalauren6171]

It’s scary that she always posts a video discussing something that is going on in my life currently

[@Thereal_Vincii]

Ain't that crazy?...

[@laurafelix1943]

I base my FE in my early teenarger, when I was influencial for my friends, I was around 12 years old, and I felt confident being who I was. Somehow this changed but I always think about this season and I know I want to have this feeling of being myself and being liked by this, influencing people with my vision.

[@wr4050]

I REALLY LOVE UR CHANNEL ! Recently discovered YOU 😚 As An INFJ I am so grateful that though we are the rare 2% of population personality type; that there are so many of us, of Me walking around! That we DO UNDERSTAND US!@!!😉☺☺☺🤗

[@deborahwolff5651]

Yes, worked for a nasty Manager who never liked me and I felt I wasn't getting the recognition I deserved. She never gave me the chance to succeed. It has incredibly painful. My Department moved to the city and I went with my Department. The Manager got fired I was so happy ! I learned so many different skills and I was so much happier!

[@wakkun]

I've been going through a much needed transition; Thanks for the encouragement, Wenzes! 💜

[@brittabergholz]

Wenzes I feel you! Gorgeous job, you and your channel are just beautiful! Love, Britta

[@aniokay]

You know, I don't know if I'm an INFJ. But nonetheless, the advice you give and the insights you give are some of the best I've come across.

[@novicewarrior8945]

had a reality break about 4 months back , thanks for the videos , its always nice to know we're not alone

[@bobbyjackson8120]

My reality break unearthed an entire life of misdirection. My reality break was during the moral breech of maintaining an open adoption...a lawman and d.a. and 3 judges helped cover it up through unwarranted protection orders. My kid and I only spoke 1 tine in 11 years. My reality broke when the local cop I became friends with through local homeless shelter...was simply keeping tabs on me to keep me from the adoption. 2 year friendship and betrayal...ending with inspote of mentioning a daughter adopted by nearby lawman...that he was inlae cousin to my daughter. My reality break closed the first borns 18 year alienation to estrangement. Now, I'm utilizing the art of war, rhetirical analysis, thematic alaysis, 59 laws of power, and subconscience mirroring of narcissistic tactics. I found the cultivation of my intuition being raised by a malignant narcissist mother during a reality break became fragments of my dark side. Before, I manuevered the world minding the deceptions of my mother as preventatives to keep out of dangers. But my entire world down to the actuality of local law functioning corrupt....ive become something I'm even afraid of...and really wish you would interview me. Just as an example or refrence...what I was before all this was hidden. I was working and livibg ib a car wash. I wore furry suites and lived carefree in a 4 block radious known enderingly by all businesses surrounding. Then one night I answered a phone call from my daughter. Entire world flipped upside down ..and even opened up the lingering mysteries of the last 12 years. I know youre very busy though. Thank you for the time you take making these. They've been 1/5 my guide during becoming a whistleblower and i tegrading my dark side during a reality break. P.s. this break has had me incompasitated at a desk for over 3 years. I can answer any brqnching inquiry. It's all fluid for the mention now.

[@bobbyjackson8120]

This break includes labour. I stopped wotking so I could put my everything into this. I roommate with many and they combined have even more pets than heads here. Ive been permitted to camp in the back room and be the live in housekeeper/pet maintainer. I promise I'm that all in infj that seems hard to explain satisfactory sometimes...when simply saying they go all in or leave all distractions... I'm litterally paused in time...like professor x at this point...just retracing the past, and redefining the actualities long missed as my mothers flying monkey.

[@bobbyjackson8120]

And just incase you ponder a beneficial reason to your channel...ill speak annoynomously. I have no desire to enter the instructional field and dont make videos. I just know ibe become alot of what you speak of in the extreme areas

[@Star-333]

This happened to me in early 2021 and it was quite difficult but there were many blessings that came out of it also.

[@leftyguitarist13]

Thanks for this. Been going through this too.

[@tiggerthecat5525]

It was drilled into me from birth that my opinion doesn't matter.

[@cinderling5472]

It matters and you matter!

[@annee5582]

Yes 🤣 Ive been disagreeing with certain professors about my essay answers there assignments. I stand behind my work, and I know that I should have received partial credit. 😂 but all this back-and-forth doesn’t really help my situation I realized the professor is going to do what they are going to do. And I don’t have the power here to change that. I accept that, but that does not mean I won’t question others or stand up for myself again.

[@BeStillandKnow0000]

Face reality, and choose better for yourself 💞

[@heba1148]

Perfect timing, I desperately needed to hear that..

[@JustineAdlong]

I love your examples of Fe! Super helpful!

[@yeshua333]

Exactly 💯

[@repCanada]

Fuck you're blowing my mind

[@jeremysmith9694]

Hey is your book still available somewhere? I would like to read it. I can't find it.

[@hollychoate8146]

I feel that it’s just …. that we just might be wrong…. Not some complicated thing that you eluded too… anybody???

[@hollychoate8146]

Sorry I put 2 oo’s🙄

[@MegaCyberleader]

total full moon, last night, I couldnt stop!. Now I cant start :(

[@МарлинЛуизаБлэк]

Narcissist is actually a psycho who thinks he or she isn't aware of his/her craziness

[@maryprinz8087]

Do you ever talk about Lightworkers? I am one. Also, I think we don't like being with most people because they are communicating from their false self...from ego...from who they are not...leaving us with no one to talk to.

[@YAMISOOLD2009]

Good way to put it!

[@SamsonPavlov]

Yes ma'am! 🪄

[@Nafshadow]

Al hamde li Allah الحمد لله

[@tigre7739]

Great video ! 👍🤘😃

[@laurafelix1943]

I've been slowly trying to move into my FE for about one month, it's something that causes me anxiety and it's been so slow that it seens like I'll end up coming back to my IN, how to move faster to my FE and never come back do IN again?

[@_N0_0ne]

Thank you

[@MegaCyberleader]

I blacked out yesterday trying to meet a quota. And it for a lot of cash but I had a black out and somebody had to stop me in the middle of my job, and i forgot what time it was.....15 hours later.

[@MegaCyberleader]

luckly people how love and know what I am made sure to force me to take a break and boy was a made. Like a charging bull. But then I thanked them for stopped me. 15 hours is too long. I dont even feel tires, I harely feel ANY pain and boy did work it!!!. So what ever is happening because of the help Im getting from channels like this. IS WORKING WELL!.

[@futureshocked]

My INFJ ex best friend became an Antivaxxer and I am praying she finally has a reality break. The funny thing is that she turned on me for being pro vaccines and she did call me a narcissist and every name in the book. It was like a dark version of what you've been talking about in your last two videos. What are we supposed to make of an INFJ who does these behaviors but is actually wrong?* *sidenote: I've since talked to other mutual friends about this person and they've related similar breakups in the friendship because of her views on medicine and other issues.

[@catsmeow3478]

I am an INFJ who also saw the truth about the shots and many friends turned on me. Have you considered that you and your friends might not be seeing the truth? INFJ’s often see what’s really going on underneath the surface narrative of organizations and the masses.

[@futureshocked]

@@catsmeow3478 Except I worked in several different sectors during and related to the pandemic where I could see what was happening and what wasn't. I worked in Journalism covering COVID before most people had even heard of it (Dec 2019 was when our outlet first started covering it). I was a contact tracer. I've met people who are data analysts who had to *find hospital beds for little kids back in 2020 when it was raging out of control in the South*. Of COURSE I've considered that I could be wrong. I love alternative theories, etc, and this just wasn't it. I will always consider that Pharma companies are on some BS. But this wasn't one of those instances. Pharma companies, believe it or not HATE when they have to do mass medicines and vaccines like this because they have to disrupt their entire supply chain and huge amounts of their workforce to essentially break even. So no, nothing about the antivaxx stance re: COVID makes any sense from both my own life experience and professional experience, as well as the raw numbers. The thing about introverted thinking OR intuition is that...you could be wrong. You could be right 90% of the time, and wrong 10%. Seeing as 1 million + people in the US are dead from this, consider which is more likely.

[@tibo5828]

@@futureshocked You are the poster child for "cognitive dissonance."

[@futureshocked]

@@tibo5828 Yes, I have cognitive dissonance after having several friends verify similar stories about this person WITHOUT ME EVEN ASKING THEM. Ok. No, I'm pretty sure I've been dealing with an INFJ absolutely running amok and tearing through friends for really no good reason other than being a know-it-all when people need her most.

[@seansollars70]

Okay

[@Relaxinghypnoasmr]

Wenzes, can you do a video on what you think the best types for infj to be in a relationship with?

[@jeremysmith9694]

It's me

[@knightgern]

I am curious. Are you married ? if you are married what is his personality type? I think you are single but I might be wrong.

[@charlesbutler4363]

@Wenzes 🤓😆😁 I have a few questions🧐 What is "reality"??? Is there more than 1 "reality"??? Isn't "reality" determined by "environment"??? Isn't pain a part of life(wouldn't know what sunny days are without rainy days)??? Could it be possible that the "world's reality" is actually a dream(the world believed a cloth mask could protect them from an airborne virus)??? #realityisintheeyesofthebeholder Be BLESSED and Stay STRAPPED(with faith)🤠🤓😇👑

[@twinsrider1]

You talk at too fast a pace in your videos (for me). Please slow down.

[@m2pozad]

If my new INFJ typing is so problematic, I'm going back to INTP. Life was so much simpler then.

[@lovelight5407]

The world is BACKWARDS and much more fun in that dimension 🤍✨️

[@MegaCyberleader]

Social Intereactions. I talk about being a game master. I KNOW you read every comment and heart the best ones. BEING A GAME MASTER is the same as being a coach. Except Its placed in a Reality I create and people CHOOSE to play in it. I am fair.. as a GOD in said game. Why do I do this? Well simple. DND helps me with papwork and abstract though of others. Im alreayd highly empathic, and in some cases, I SWEAR I can hear the thoughts of others and even see thier hallucination when they are having a though playback with video. The reason why I can do all of this, Is because I got over myself for one, but the secondary and also primary reason, Is I took a severe injury that SHOULDA landed me in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. However I refused to give up and IF I CAN MOVE even if its pain. THEN ILL MOVE. So with years of meditation while I was suicidally depressed. I found that the answer was also the problem.. and the problem was its own solutions!!!!!! Basicaly PAIN water marks all my emotions, so I can decern mines from others.. IF they are in pain, I can desern the differance as well. Nobody likes pain. There is plenty of it. "Let the pain wash over you. :)" -j.c.