Why you should define your fears instead of your goals | Tim Ferriss | TED

[@omicron942]

Dude that quote... "Easy choices, hard life. Hard choices, easy life". That's brilliant.

[@instantentertainment9351]

Love it

[@user-ez5vq9fd2t]

There is a very similar quote (don't know the source) that says something along the lines of, "If you do only what is easy, life will be hard. If you do what is hard, life will be easy."

[@dpaganuccipag1700]

Om

[@SamuelEiche]

"I've never met a strong person with an easy past."

[@ماهرالسماحي-م4ل]

Omicron942 you are right

[@fajzulin]

Another very good one is: Good habits are hard to form, but easy to live with. Bad habits are easy to form, but hard to live with.

[@jaceydurland9098]

That's a really good one.

[@antoinetournecuillert1099]

Hard choice, easy life / easy choices/ hard life

[@mohammadazzam269]

Thanks for the quote !

[@ranc1977]

"Good habits are hard to form, but easy to live with. Bad habits are easy to form, but hard to live with." We won't notice if something is bad - through Deficiency motivation.

[@raymondyap6412]

That is a more elaborate version of "Easy choice, hard life. Hard Choice, easy life" Or maybe it is the other way around. "Easy Choice, hard life. Hard choice, easy life" is an abbreviation of "Good habits are hard to form, but easy to live with. Bad habits are easy to form, but hard to live with."

[@2MuchSwag4Funzies]

Watched this talk today and asked out a girl I've been crushing on for months cuz of this. Turns out she's been crushing on me too. powerful talk.

[@oreo8373]

❤🔥

[@2MuchSwag4Funzies]

NIKS POSITIVE people avoid being positive because they're scared of getting hurt. That's why the importance of Stoicism is huge in this talk. This girl is drop dead gorgeous btw, I never thought she'd even crush on a guy like me. Positivity goes a long way.

[@stm12p]

i did the same thing today. Got rejected tho. I guess I gotta stay stoic.

[@ImOutsideTheBox]

Well done man! Now you'll discover the REAL hard part which is building a relationship haha, but that's OK because it means your learning and you'll have a great time

[@2MuchSwag4Funzies]

stm12p hey man but at least now you know, rather than regretting you never tried. And who knows, maybe she'll see you differently in the future, I've seen it happen. Rejection isn't really the end

[@moritzschroder]

almost 3 years ago i sat in the car, driving to an interview for a job i didnt want, in a profession i didnt care about. during that drive i listened to the tim ferriss show and it was so insipring that when i eventually arrived at the interview, i had already decided that i wouldnt take the job. instead i moved to stockholm, recently started my own personal development company, grow my youtube channel and am happier than i ever would have been otherwise. thank you, tim!

[@SaharaKnoblauch]

good for you! 🔥🙌

[@englishjosh]

I feel as though I'm in a similar boat. It would be good to discuss more with you dude

[@DanielsPengetips]

Good for you!

[@hantzleyaudate7697]

Wolkify hey, would you need any help with building software for your people? I develop apps and websites, have you thought of online courses?

[@m4ri5a8]

Congratulations

[@cliffhanley2120]

"I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened." Mark Twain.

[@sarahhussam2759]

haha i love this

[@tahitihawaiiblue]

😂

[@antoniao7439]

Ooooo i finally get that quote

[@williampittard]

.

[@ranc1977]

He also said: Good decisions come from experience. Experience comes from making bad decisions. Mark Twain In most cases the man's life is about equally divided between happiness and unhappiness. When this is not the case the unhappiness predominates-always. The Mysterious Stranger by Mark Twain Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination. MARK TWAIN, The Mysterious Stranger

[@claudio6032]

Now i know why Bruce Lee said: “Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one”

[@Shotgunster]

I'm not sure but he probably was quoting someone from the ancient ones.

[@Fujtajblus]

@@Shotgunster At the end of the day, it does not matter who said it, only that this wisdom is carried to the future for others to learn from it.

[@2livenoob]

JFK.

[@pileofashes85]

I think I've heard this quote in meditations by Marcus Aurelius

[@BearfootBrad]

I thought this was jfk

[@Musashi246]

What if I...? Define: All of the 10-20 worst things that could happen if you take the step. Prevent: What could I do to prevent each of these points to happen or decrease the likelyhood? Repair: If the worst case scenario happen what could you do to repair the damage (even a little bit) or who could I ask for help. _________________________ What might be the benifits of an attempt or a partial success? (Higher discipline, skills...) -________________________ The cost of inaction: (Emotionally, physically, financially, etc.) 6 Months: 1 Years: 3 Years:

[@vlogsbyrow]

Thank you sir/ma'am :)

[@donedumi-leslie5304]

Thanks Sweechie!!

[@willd0g]

Sweechie thx

[@idoumouamarbaga6175]

Sweechie thank you for the effort

[@daniellipenda6249]

Sweechie thanks

[@50interviews]

At 3 mins into his talk, Tim defines stoicism as "an operating system for thriving in high-stress environments and making better decisions." Brilliant!

[@Plasmafox]

Stoicism is how an Emperor justifies slavery by declaring that the slaves can simply choose to be happy.

[@ranc1977]

That is definition of mental health. Stoicism is being trapped into crap fitting to abuse and toxicity and pretending you are covered with rose petals.

[@singlachirag12]

Two things this talk taught me: "Easy choices, hard life. Hard choices easy life" "We suffer more in imagination than in reality"

[@Gapetz]

Did you only took the quotes out?

[@anatoligorianski3395]

Lazy

[@ranc1977]

What happens when suffering becomes reality?

[@Learned333]

Is not the continued exercise of "fear setting" going to be the real teacher, and not some quotes? Quotes led Tim Ferris like a bread crumb trail to real solutions.

[@birgip.m.1236]

Sometimes there's only hard choices which don't create an easy life.

[@Breathewithbrock]

What I love about Tim is his complete LACK of ego. We often think business mogels/athletes/actors are these bulletproof individuals that have no problems, but they are struggling with things just like us. That's encouraging to me.

[@realemmareid]

I love that too

[@teno777]

Everyone has an ego, it’s just some people have learnt how to temper it.

[@exploitedfight8081]

Oh he definitely has an ego. You can see it in his facial expressions. But he's very calculating at what he's showing/saying

[@SmallSpoonBrigade]

@@exploitedfight8081 keep in mind that he's known for pushing his responsibilities onto others while reaping the reward.

[@RajendraSingh-wh4pn]

Before achieving success everyone struggles atleast once!

[@HarveyBirdMans]

"The only time a man can be brave is when he's afraid" -Ned Stark

[@MrCmon113]

When you need to rely on the bravery of others you don't mean that you want there to be some inner struggle, you want them to stand fast. Whether that is because they overcome their fear or because they had none to begin with is irrelevant.

[@wiseauserious8750]

Great quote 👍 it's important not to lose your head over the fear of life's challenges

[@Ray2311us]

marvin harvey FACTS

[@SquidCena]

@Laughing Out Loud No one said anyone was more brave than anyone?

[@parbatisharma1431]

How can a man be brave when he's afraid.

[@redporkpadthai6368]

This is way more helpful for me than goal setting. Depressive episodes have impeded my goals on numerous occasions and being able to tackle them from a different from the place of fear that they create is so much more helpful.

[@lintang790]

True for me too

[@HarmonicWave]

That's exactly why the title drew me to watching this. I have all kinds of goals, even specific ones with time frames. But then I don't take action because I don't feel like I know how to do the next step and worry that I may get part way through a process and then have something go wrong, especially when other people (clients) are making big decisions. What if they change their mind and I get myself stuck in a complicated situation? So I don't do anything and the months go by and my goals keep getting pushed off into the nebulous future.

[@בנינירן]

after 2 years of growth non stop - i can say- this was the best tool i encountred on the internet. BY FAR , THANK YOU TIMOTHY

[@plantbasedandpositive5477]

"I realised that inaction was no longer an option for me" - This is so relevant for me right now, I am grateful that I stumbled across this video today. Great talk, I'll be using that fear-setting exercise :)

[@ranc1977]

Inaction is Charcot Hysteria - it is not being lazy. Self pathologizing ourselves leads to personality disorder. Invalidating our emotions, experiences and pain leads to self abuse and narcissism - where we cover up our wounds, pretend they do not exist and then build up fake persona of grandiosity and perfection - that other people must obey and admire. In short - this is path to mental illness and schizophrenia. Very soon reality will hit - and the reason for inaction will appear again and again. Then we will be left with toxic advice to label ourselves as sick abnormal for feeling pain and harm - and we won't notice that toxic people, external factor - are the cause of our immobility and pain. This way toxic monsters like Putin and Trump stay in power - since zombies are preoccupied with self and narcissism and rigid mindset of scapegoating easy targets.

[@Nmdresser]

Such a well-spoken, driven guy. Nothing is a better teacher than life and grinding through the struggle.

[@ranc1977]

Nope. "The best teacher is the one who teaches you how to be your own teacher." Mehmet Murat İldan

[@TasTheWatcher]

"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain"

[@janvanhof1469]

Let's give everyone a heart-plug :)

[@Fred0014Channel]

David McGhee The Dune

[@gabogalaiz]

David McGhee god dammit that's harsh

[@hanswoast7]

Thanks for this quote, dude. It's a nice one :) Source: “I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.” ― Frank Herbert, Dune(#1)

[@KrittinKalra]

David McGhee Thanks for the quote

[@xxkarenp]

Last time I watched this video I was contemplating and planning to move out of state. Now It has been a little over a year since I moved. Better things came after I moved past the initial fear. Thank you.

[@daniel4647]

I think what you said here is more inspiring than the talk. I always try to move away, but after about 3 months I lose my mind and go back to where I'm from, where it's nice and safe. I'm thinking that if I just stuck it out past that it would probably get better. I think I'm going to try again, thanks.

[@chocopieces9529]

it's been 3 years for me, still here. I'm doing steps to make that move though, thanks to stoicism.

[@AliceP.]

So good to read this, it's exactly the fear I'm struggling to overcome.

[@abudabisas]

wow im from town called palanga, hahha

[@ranc1977]

Almost every mental disorder originates in childhood experience and originates as coping mechanism. When you are threatened with something, you would not be anxious, you would be afraid - as you should be. YT Dr. Gabor Mate

[@zspearl]

I broke up with my partner of 9 years partially inspired by this talk-and I’ve never been happier. Generally a stoic practicer now

[@boyandcatmum]

I am so grateful these wonderful and courageous people so selflessly share their lives and how they overcame such personal and painful situations with everyone in the hope to reach someone out there. This was really helpful thanks Tim.

[@TaliShlafer]

KZbin's algorithm for suggested videos couldn't be more spot on for recommending this video to me. I've been working on huge life changes in the last few months and have hit a point in the last couple of weeks where I'm feeling totally paralyzed by fear. This talk is already helping me start addressing those fears and feel like myself again. Thank you, Tim.

[@avinash369]

Tali Travel may God give u more power. Amen

[@sarahthemango4829]

~ the moment when i realize that i did all of these fear setting techniques in middle school & thinking about all of this at my desk while doing homework changed my life forever~

[@BrilliantBusinesses]

This is my favourite Tim Ferris speech, I use 'We suffer more often in imagination than in reality' to help me make any kind of tricky decision - and 'Easy Choices - Hard Life. Hard Choices - Easy Life' is something I think about a LOT. Great work Tim!

[@andrewpride5230]

I had no idea he had Bipolar Depression, have been listening to him for a long time. Powerful Tim, thank you.

[@Maria70007]

This talk only works in a very limited context. There are so many people who suffer trauma from reality - people of color post-colonization, rape and sexual assault victims, grieving family members who have lost a loved one, the countless marginalized groups whom the “meritocracy-based” Western system fails more than they can comprehend. To ignore your emotions or act as if you are making a bigger deal of things than you actually are is to deny being true to your experience. Emotions are a reminder that you are alive, and while they should be managed if they cause your life to spiral out of control, I personally don’t resonate with the ideology that to endure hardship without complaint is to cure yourself of any mental ailments. I’m glad this talk has worked for some people, but for anyone who heard this and thought it invalidated their experiences, I am here for you ❤️

[@HackTheBeat]

thats not stoicism. please explain to me, how is it fear(emotion)-setting close to ignoring emotion? Its just the oposite.

[@Maria70007]

@@HackTheBeatit’s been awhile since I posted this, so I will do my best to respond to your question from what I remember. I’m not saying it is bad to identify your fears - I just have a problem with the speaker’s framework in doing so. he is not saying to identify your fears in order to work through them. He’s giving tips on how to disprove them or prevent/reduce their likelihood. However, plenty of people have fears that are rooted in reality rather than hypothetical scenarios, things that are out of their control, things they have experienced and still have not recovered from. There are different ways to process emotions, and the method this speaker is proposing cannot be used equally for all fears, because sometimes you have to sit in it. If you have been traumatized, if you more susceptible to exploitation in your life, or if you are in grief, you need to be able to validate and process your fears in order to move forward. Running away from your fears when they are embedded in you does not work

[@HackTheBeat]

I agree with your viewpoint. Different problems, different solutions. I misunderstood your previous comment. Thank you @@Maria70007

[@lisatomei9664]

@@Maria70007 I can feel your pain through your words. Specifically, you seem to latch on to "grief" as something having been experienced by all marginalized society members--I think it's important to understand that grief is not an emotion, but a "state" and can only be gone 'through' - my reply is more to your saying how fears are rooted in reality and each one of us creates our perceived "reality" based on our experiences, and it's not to say you can just run from fears, but you can identify, become aware, and CHOOSE to be less fearful. More faithful.

[@TrNdke]

Buddhism had been the best practice I've done. Similar concepts in Stoicism, but the point is that everyone needs and operating system and a way to update their internal "software". That's the only way you stop being blown around by the winds of change and start learning to ride the waves and set your own course.

[@Suckyea]

this last sentence man, is it your own or? because thats just a brilliant metaphor.

[@dayelu6028]

Buddhism gives you a way out of the matrix, a kind of ultimate way to existence. Stoicism still deals how to have a good life inside the matrix.

[@EtherealBeauty89]

Daye Lu exactly. That's why I found the talk very creepy. It teaches you to function even more effectively. That is crazy. You deal with stress, but don't get rid of it. The guy even sounded like a robot to me. A lot of ego in there.

[@birgip.m.1236]

​​@@EtherealBeauty89Life requires some tension (ie stress), it's how growth happens, so I dunno how realistic it is to pursue getting rid of stress Also, you need some ego otherwise you become a doormat for other people's 💩

[@zouhd7749]

most impressed by: hard choices, uncomfortable conversations are more often make easy life.

[@laukathy8464]

This talk gave me the push for a breakup at the beginning of 2018. I've grown a lot since then and know it was the right decision. Thanks Tim!

[@deanbrown1591]

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."

[@nayad1129]

Thanks! some people like me around here needs to remind this from time to time..

[@maychellelabitoria1390]

Matthew 6:34

[@ranc1977]

This is the same as to say to depressive person not to be sad. And to smile. Worry is much more complex than this. If we do not use our brain, we will be zombies. Overthinking is not pathology. When we worry there is real true external factor such as toxic people who manipulate and control us - for the very reason we do not think nor doubt them.

[@mrbarkan]

Going to watch this everyday until it sticks to my brains. Thank you Tim.

[@BeFreeHugATree]

Did it ever stick?

[@Praying_ManTas]

@@BeFreeHugATree Actually it got stuck in his brain, causing it to clot. This lead to death.

[@realemmareid]

still watching?

[@yashbhatla4329]

The message that he wanted to convey is clear, instead of watching this on everyday use the table and transcend your fears.

[@kasraahmadi8885]

good idea! It´s been 3 years since you commented this. I hope u still do this, when not, u can start again

[@1989maihan]

His presentation was poetic! No pauses. It was fluid and engaging. I wish i could present like that one day.

[@koushikmaji7998]

Work on it, you will

[@juliandsalazar]

@@koushikmaji7998 You will

[@ranc1977]

Probably high on something.

[@downbntout]

Practice, as much as it takes. Public speaking is only a learn able skill.

[@Wendathena]

Love this talk. Resonates with me as I am someone who has a bit of anxiety and my mind often goes to the worst case scenario. When I verbalize my fears in a conversation with my husband (even when they don't have anything to do with him, although it is often about our children), he responds with defensiveness and tries to invalidate what I am feeling and tells me that where my mind goes is just too extreme. Recently when this happened I asked him if maybe he could instead of trying to talk me out of what I was feeling, to ask "what if that did happen?" and then spend time talking about what we might do if various scenarios came to pass. Hearing this talk really validated to me that there is value in doing this.

[@wolfferoni]

I needed this right now. Going through a depressive episode. Really unhappy with my life but I've spoken to therapists who never gave me this exercise to really push myself and see the damage that I'm doing to myself in the long run. Thank you

[@ranc1977]

It is an ironic habit of human beings to run faster when they have lost their way. Rollo May

[@denraethel]

For me, writing down my fears was one of the best decision of my life. Realising what you exactly fear gives you self awareness. What's better is that after writing down your fears, you also identify what you don't fear, which was the bigger part for me. I saw that all this time I was living focusing on my fears. They were in my mind all the time and always held me back from things I wish I could do. I owned my fears and made them a part of me and because of this, I could never get rid of them. Defining what I don't fear changed it all. After all those years of suffering inside the mind of fears, I would call this one "real freedom". Thank you so much for this lifechanging video, Tim Ferriss!

[@lorenzoantonio5589]

Tim, if you ever read this, it's important for me to express what a brilliant speech you gave.

[@zuby985]

love Tim Ferris; I have read 4-hour work week 3 times, plus others. with that…what he is doing here is focusing on the fear in order to overcome it. A more powerful method is to simply live in the moment, in the present, in the now. Why focus on the imagined future, which doesnt exist? the courage you get from facing an imagined outcome is also imagined. He is actually going against the quote…”we suffer more in our imagination than in reality””. if that is so…why disect the fear that is just our perceived catastrophic future? when you live in the present there is awareness and nothing to fear. we act out of true inner strength and are ok with any outcome. This is only if you want to live a happy life and succeed, not just externally, but internally.

[@jwh0122]

3 pages of fear-setting 6:01 What if I ...? 8:13 What might be the benefits of an attempt or partial success? 8:38 The cost of inaction

[@beldonhuang]

Thanks for noting this down!

[@snowrabbit5860]

Define, Prevent; Repair

[@mysoulshelter]

Mind-blowing conversation which popped up so unexpectedly. I am grateful to everyone who takes an action for broadening out TED-talks! Stay tuned and impressed ❤

[@AliceP.]

I've been unhappy with the place I live and the profession I chose for years now, ever since the beginning of college - and it's been two years I graduated. I'm still 25 so my mind keeps telling me that this is the time to change things and be brave, so once more I'm planning to move to another city and start from scratch, but I've had these times before and I always give up after some months of planning because it is so scary. My father is willing to help me with money and/or support and he doesn't pressure me that much yet 'cause I'm young but I'm afraid I'll grow old and find myself in the same position. Of all the steps he described that last one is undoubtedly the scariest.

[@sravanthkumarchintalacheru1359]

How's everything going now?

[@muhammadisrarulhaq9052]

More Power to you main. Remember its about the journey, not the destination. So don't get scared of thinking what will happen, instead enjoy the process of you building yourself, only that matters man. Because as for results, we could be dead tomorrow

[@AliceP.]

@@sravanthkumarchintalacheru1359 I did move to another city, it's been a little over a year. It's all been messy and I'm yet to find my balance, but I definitely feel happier. I always think of how interesting it is that I finally took the step a little before the pandemic broke - I would have been feeling miserable if I were still in my hometown, unable to leave the house. Almost feels like someone saved me, cause I don't know what my head space would look like. The place where I live now has a dog and lots of green spaces. I smile at least once a day, drinking coffee whilst looking at the landscape or playing with the dog. I'm able to breathe. Thank you for asking!

[@PatisaNombakuseITAuditMentor]

I love this talk, I used to run away from my own fears. When I started confronting them, magic happened

[@adhd2372]

Very well said. Some points for those who want to take away some gold 1. A stoic is not spock, not emotionally deprived 2 The speaker idealizes a man who does nor allow fear to prevent or stall his decisions and action ;rather, he uses his principles and values to guide them 3. Instead of avoiding fears and decisions that need to be addressed,DEFINING them, finding ways to PREVENT them and REPAIRING the worst case scenario that could come about, is an approach that could alleviate fears and give more clarity to the situation. 3 Addressing the issue of inaction, avoiding something should be assessed on its long term outcome on one's life.for example, the speaker assesses the outcome at 6 months, 1 yr etc.

[@lefaek3720]

This is one of if not the most amazing and effective talks I’ve ever listened to. Fellow ted talk addicts, listen to the talks with eyes closed and focusing on the words themselves instead of watching the video. I find it helps in understanding the message better. Even missing the visual media is okay.

[@hankigoe829]

1:25 "Many rounds in the ring with darkness", what a great line

[@NickyMondelliniActriz]

“Easy choices,hard life.Hard choices,easy life”, this is so true! Hard choices are what bring the greatest results.

[@eliana93fer]

Amazing TED talk, the fact that he starts by sharing that we once was about to kill himself I think makes the following speech much more emphatic and meaningful. Thank you for sharing!

[@denise2169]

Great talk! have found that going THROUGH my fears (sadness, depression, etc) and coming out the other side, has helped me finally find growing inner peace. I learned that I would come out the other side, and even if I didn’t ‘succeed’ in my endeavours, I knew that I would be still be OK, and that any sadness or fear at that moment would release. Hard choices because society taught us to avoid them, but when you get used to it, it is empowering, positive and life-changing!

[@beldonhuang]

Nicely said! Glad that you overcame those negative feelings and became a better person than before!

[@GaberInc]

Watching this before my first day back at university in five years (dropped out last time due to crippling depression). Thank you for the continual electronic mentorship and helpful exercise, Tim. Time to buckle up and get this done.

[@andrews9615]

That philosophy boils down to three questions I ask myself everyday. What do I know? What do I want? Knowing those two things, what is my responsibility? I spend literally hours asking myself those same three questions over and over.

[@Ryanspashai]

The title caught my eye, interesting because I thought this was a bit pessimistic, I was totally wrong.

[@therabbithat]

ShowerThoughts positive thinking is the most harmful and damaging disease around at the moment, arguably the number one killer in western countries. don't think of a white bear

[@EvanNDoan-ry8vf]

+therabbithat omgosh. thank u . I feel so much less alone..

[@a.m.5973]

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, that is what he figured out on his own. This ted talk is basically how CBT worked for him. Check it out. It helps others with ptsd and panic disorders.

[@mansourkibarabara464]

Hola

[@thechxshirecat]

"we suffer more in our imagination than in reality" this is so true tho

[@fab211]

MayainWonderland I saw something similar somewhere else, "99% of the things we worry about never actually happens"

[@humbaleeyours]

story of my life! lol

[@vihangsupare95]

Not making this up but I can relate to the quote so much that I literally cried after pausing the video.

[@AlbertoGonzalez-uu9sb]

I know, I have always pictured worst case scenarios, thinking they would become reality and I started writing them three years ago. The other day, when I looked at them again, I saw that none of them were founded fears, none of them have become my reality. Still, I find it hard to manage anxiety; I do not have it figured out. In words of Jorge Luis Borges; " I worried more that I should have".

[@ARichardP]

So true. Our minds are stoked with fear, be it from biological, evolutionary, familial, religious, political or cultural sources. It's helpful to make the harder choice to work to "get behind" the mind so we can observe it doing this worrisome dance. And then not get involved in that never-ending conversation. The mind keeps making stuff up like an attention-hounding noise-spewing geyser. What a relief to just watch it and not be hooked into mistaking that display for who we are.

[@frankpray1701]

He stepped up stoically to be this transparent, and the result is hope for persons suffering from bipolar disorder. The decision to give this talk may not have been easy for Ferriss, but it was beautiful.

[@msontopoftheworld]

Thoroughly following his process could lead to over-thinking; which can then increase stress, which leads to depression! Sometimes just "do" and deal with the fallout as they come. I wish him and pp who suffer depression/suicide thoughts the very best. We're strong and can overcome. 🌺🌸🌹

[@GabiIaccovazzo]

"we suffer more in our imagination than in reality" what a phrase. Makes a lot of sense. It is so real.

[@TheScienceCube]

This is to my students - "Easy Choices, Hard Life! Hard Choices, Easy Life!" Jerzy Gregorek I really hope this TED Talk is seen by youngsters as they prepare for life ahead. Thanks Tim!

[@ravenonefiveninefour]

This reminds me of when I was a teen. My parents were drug addicts and seasoned felons. I grew up telling myself often, "don't be like them". Worked.

[@ms.shatinams.lin_beifong3687]

I'm so glad that this video was in my search results on KZbin on goal setting. The past two years have been very stressful for me and just last year, got even more overwhelming through a betrayal. I've been feeling so stuck in life that I really have no emotion to anything that should be exciting. I only feel "alive" when I'm rushing against time to get to work or study for school but even then my head is not in the game. After dinner with a family member this past April, I've decided to move out of state and somewhere where I can feel again. Right now, I'm creating my list of fears as Mr. Ferriss suggests and hopefully I will feel something while I tackle my list. I know some of my fears if not most will cause me to come out of my comfort zone/survival mode. And I do believe this to be coincidental because today is July 14, 2019, exactly two years from the publish date of this video. :)

[@wondergirl2561]

Tim Ferries is a legend of modern life. He is always on the point, no extra words. A true strategist.

[@pelosauve]

My fears loose their power over me when I put them on paper and speak to another person about them. Every, time.

[@Netbase2000]

Mine don't

[@rameshhansaravendra]

Nate Tube . 100%

[@a.m.5973]

@@Netbase2000 What he figured out and does is called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Read up on this. This is very powerful stuff that helps people with panic disorders and ptsd. This is more than just writing it on paper. What you do is a root cause analysis of this problem looking at fears, then rationalizing this bad approach like asking 'how successful was it for other people to avoid this action', the consequences if you can't change, the strategy to change like trying to do this differently (example: he talks about forwarding phone calls) - this is the part that you begin to get more rational about this, a positive reminder about this approach, a plan if you forget and get a little irrational again like how to get back on track, and reflection of this like thinking how you feel afterwards. You can add identifying the specific emotions behind your initial reaction and look really deep to figure out when you first started reacting this way. This will require a lot of focus for every action you evaluate - it might take more than 3 pages and it will take a few hours. It will require uninterrupted time - this is more than just writing on paper in passing or being distracted and focusing elsewhere. Do this right it will change your life. Check out the research on this.

[@Clemsterful]

I concur. its effective with the person that earn the trust and all they have to do is listen.

[@elled10024]

Brave heart you have, Mr. Ferriss. So sweet. So good. Thank you for being you.

[@GlenHunt]

Coming from someone who has been where I am now gives this weight with me. I've never liked trite messages of hope, especially while I am embroiled in an ongoing battle with my own chronic psychological illness. This, instead, has reiterated to my mind that my #1 fear is confronting my fears while I am largely unable to manage them. First dealing with my fear of my fears is recursive, but as long as I can keep it straight this is a tool and modality I can use.

[@a.m.5973]

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, which Tim figured out for himself and uses, is really powerful. It helps others with panic disorders and ptsd. There is a lot of research behind this.

[@mraz2685]

this is one of the best tedtalks I've watched literally cuts to the chase that fears must be faced and when they are faced they won't keep you stuck anymore

[@mochammadmarsha4238]

practical solution for procrastinators like me, or simply for those who might be too afraid of the downfall before they even try. excellent ted talk, one of my favorites

[@ItsMeNotus]

THIS IS TIM FERRISS? I listened to this podcast 3 years ago, constantly rewatching so I could implement this. Now, I read his books and follow his blogs, and throughout all that I had no idea he was the one who did this lecture

[@vidishasoni6585]

Without any title references or relatability... this is the second time I'm hearing this thing Stoicism. The universe definitely want me to follow on that..👍👍

[@KarenKefauver]

Tim, thank you. This talk is so important. To have someone of Tim's stature and influence talk candidly about his own struggle is incredible stride in national discussion of mental health.

[@thefilipinojoe]

Life hack.. Always follow your heart, do what is right, and trust everything will be okay. Be fearless and know that your level of fearlessness is evidence of your faith in a higher power and the promise that everything will be fine if you follow your heart and do what is right. The more I have done this, the more blessings I have received.

[@Nichtword]

I do not fear much in my life since I am still a teenager. But I think Tim teaches me to face the future fear without anxiety. I really appreciate his talk and learn a new thing today. Thanks to Tedx too.

[@DraRed73]

I listened to this and concluded: What am I afraid of? -> Nothing = Not challenging myself Thanks for the inspiration to find something to be afraid of.

[@mariaferguson2224]

Awesome!

[@NEWGREATNESS]

This is by far and easily one of the best and my most favorite Ted talks. Thank you Tim Ferriss you have no idea how much I needed to hear this.

[@ThePasindu]

The most impactful TED Talk I've watched

[@atulsarkar3760]

The thing that i admire most about Ted talks are they never throw the philosophies inside you , they come up with data,statistics and real life examples.

[@NancySolariLivingFullOut]

Wow I love the idea of “fear-setting.” It allows people to move past hesitation and progress on their path to living full out.

[@a.m.5973]

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy - this is what he figured out for himself and described in this ted talk. There is research behind this method. The results are real.

[@septamush]

I love how Tim talked about the need to identify fears and even how to overcome it. You'd see that they are based on experience, even his books are also amazing! I’ve heard influencers and authors who does it too, even therapist that host podcasts like the Pioneers of Insight podcast, but not too many others.

[@MandhanAcademy]

thanks God ! Highly effective Life changing Talk :) a lot of gratitude for Beloved Tim Ferriss :)

[@redwarf8118]

I Thank Tim not some imagined God.

[@ethangunter9330]

@@redwarf8118 Let people live their lives...

[@redwarf8118]

@@ethangunter9330 don´t tell me what to do. I am just holding the mirror.

[@TheGardenerNorth]

I can't believe that of all the time I've been painfully searching for help, advice or even the answer to all my woes in life, at 59 years old, my daughter just put me onto this man and its like the light bulb didn't just go on, it exploded releasing hope.

[@pink1lipstic]

I love this Tim, he's so inspirational whenever I listen to him plus all of the advice and suggestions he offers are easily doable. You change people's lives Tim, that's amazing!

[@tashmoore3825]

I like this. One of the things I noticed since I've listened to positive talks or podcasts is that I had a tendency to disregard the advice of men. Not always, but I would usually discount it by asking another woman. Possibly without even vetting which woman I was asking. There are reasons for this yet it's something I've been working to repair because not every man is wrong. This is great advice, from a man, about evaluating our fears concerning outcomes.

[@ЛадаАлимова]

Thank you Tim for one of the most impressive and mind-blowing speech I have ever heard. It has a tremendous impact on me. Thank you!

[@benedetta8001]

"The hard choices we most fear doing, asking or saying these are very often exactly what we most need to do. " Thank you, it helps me a lot :)

[@SpringHWhipple]

Ahhh,Tim. Been following you and reading your books for years. Thank you for this talk, Sir. I came upon it again at just the right time. Solid advice. Great things to think about when having to make those most difficult decisions. Cheers to your continued success!

[@TheEarthsAngels]

This is great came - up in my feed today! Thank you for sharing. My husband took his life almost 8 years ago & I’ve struggled making sense of it. I’m in a good place where I can now help others. All information is greatly appreciated. 🙏 ☮️👊🏼

[@rahul8346]

❤️ Summary ❤️: Write if you did decide to do something new, what will happen? Page1 - Fear Setting 🤔 Define: list of bad things that can happen... Prevent: List of action that you can take to prevent the bad effect. Repair: Assume if worst case or the most feared thing did happen, what list of action can take to repair it. Page2: What you will gain? 🥳 List all things that you may gain, example: New skill Thrill Experience Page3: Cost of Inaction 🧐 In 6 months: what would be the impact on your physical, mental, financial health due to not going ahead with the decision in next 6 month time. In 1 year : same as above but for 1 year timespan In 3 year : same as above but for 3 year timespan All the Best 👍

[@helenarocavianna5021]

I admire Tim Ferris success after struggles in life. But the Red Line here to me is the Estoicism! The most Perfect philosophy ever, it's based in the simple and total truth, my life changed for the better since I discovered this divine philosophy. It has to be exercised every day!💯

[@rio0323]

12:27 This quote really scared me and motivated me.

[@therealmonopoly5575]

Fear stops us from being greater then we really are or think. When I feel fear at doing something ? A voice within me tells me to go for it and do it any ways. After the doing it the results are amazing and a increase to another higher level in my life. This the beautiful part about the results ? When you think back and say wow if I never made that move I would not be wealthy, I would not have this great career, this woman would not be my wife right now. Once you start feeling fear only means for you to push yourself and do it. Trust me your future self will be so, so happy of you doing that. Great video man I LOVE IT. 🔥💯🚨

[@KasieMusic]

My favourite TEDS talk so far. So much wisdom in one video. Absolutely fantastic.

[@jomontanee]

At the near end when Tim told the story of Jerry, his mentor, about the sufferings that Jerry and his wife faced I cried. What a powerful true story indeed.

[@chinmaysheth8860]

This is a lot like Dale Carnegie's book, "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living", a good read for anyone.

[@3dgar7eandro]

This is probably one of the most powerful and life changing videos I have seen... But it is no surprise it has only 3 million views... The rest of the world doesn't know how important it is to take action and to confront our fears 💪😌👌

[@ferramirez4570]

One of the best Ted Talk i've ever watched!.

[@ThePasindu]

Agreed. Same here.

[@prima6170]

Thank you for putting yourself out there. It's important that people understand that people who want to commit suicide are not crazy. If you have thoughts of suicide, it's important that you talk to someone immediately. Usually, the feelings pass in a few hours. Usually, when we get into your late 20s we learn to cope better with our problems and these feeling diminish greatly or disappear completely.

[@susanhansen9032]

Where has this inspiring philosopher been all my life?

[@RobertTommy-bn2xw]

I felt too much overwhelmed and depression right now . But I listen to TED speech. It gave me to keep on going. Thank You for helping us. 🎉❤ I am not only watching but also I am learning English language from this website.🎉

[@davidkonevky7372]

I felt that when I would put my fears on paper, it would be a lot worse. Turns out there's 2 "bad"outcomes that could possibly happen, and they are MUCH smaller I thought. They can easily be fixed, and the benefit is much more bigger too! This put me into perspective to how much we exagerate things for excusrs

[@significantvloggers6033]

This quantifies what I've lost in the last few years to tragedies and errors. In youth, things happened to me that I could not control, and I was forced to take a hard look at what I could do. In adulthood, there is much I can do--but what I cannot do I feel I should, and that's a fallacy that blurs what it is I'm capable of. I was not capable of figuring out last year's sudden disability alone--I'd had no experience with anaphylactic shock prior, nor with environmental allergies, nor with figuring out the homelessness that followed 3 months into becoming sick due to bills, inability to work, and inadequate doctors. I should not let that incapability define what I'm actually able to do, nor should I let that rock my confidence, especially since what I did do with the 10 hrs a week I had the ability to be productive with was build a non-profit for at risk, homeless, and foster youth from 2 people to 6 board members, 6 volunteer staff, partially funded, structurally capable of doing what we've set out to do--now in two countries--and get invited into grant writing, all while doing the footwork of figuring out my health. I've been through alot more than that over the last 4 years, and I thank you for helping me put words to what I actually need to do to rebuild. With Love and fondness in my heart, I wish you only success!!!

[@JPatelLive]

5:35 = Tip! 6:35 = Exercise 📝👍🏾

[@ddg8431]

Had no idea Tim battled bipolar disorder until I heard him speak on the Rich Roll podcast, which in turn brought me here. If you liked this Ted Talk, you will love the Rich Roll interview of Tim. Tim goes a little deeper into who he is and things he has battled. As always Tim, thank you for the leadership and guidance.

[@osmans1694]

When u do TED talk instead of Tedx that means u have made it in life.

[@COINsimp2024]

O s #goals

[@kerryobrien6110]

TEDx is like the Fun Run at a 10K.

[@jamesgrahamclas5204]

Only way that guarantees you’ve made it through and in life is salvation and forgiveness of sins through Christ Jesus.

[@paulomendes1193]

I hope you're joking

[@jov__ana]

Paulo Mendes hahahh

[@suewilson9833]

I was so nervous for my new job. I am not a native English speaker, but managed to get a job in a prestigious local company. So worried and scared. I watched this, followed what you recommended and it was very helpful. I survived in that company over a year now. Love and thanks 😊

[@Katkiwi25]

Unrelated to the talk, but he reminds me of handsome Squidward

[@kupamanduka]

OH MY GOD NOW THAT YOU'D MENTIONED IT I CAN'T UNSEE IT ASDFGHJKL

[@KoreyThatcher]

SO MUCH YES

[@cuteflygon]

What an underrated comment...

[@SquidCena]

Really?

[@RahsaanBoone]

lol

[@helfulvids]

Great talk. I could not help but see the parallels found in project management: 1) Identifying risks 2) Performing quantitative risk analysis 3) Performing qualitative risk analysis 4) Plan risk responses