Women don't close: what you want doesn't matter

[@psychacks]

It's come to my attention that -- when it comes to relationships -- many women are not very good at sealing the deal. This is because women don't close. Like bad salesmen, they tend to lead with what they want, which is unlikely to end with a sale. For better or worse, what you want doesn't matter. Rather, it's a good idea to lead with what the other person wants and frame what you want as a means to that end. Join my community: the-captains-quarters.mn.co Buy my book, "The Value of Others" Ebook: amzn.to/460uGrA Audiobook: amzn.to/3YfFwbx Paperback: amzn.to/3xQuIFK Book a paid consultation: oriontarabanpsyd.com/consultations Subscribe to my newsletter: oriontarabanpsyd.com Social Media TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@oriontaraban Facebook: facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090053889622 LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/orion-taraban-070b45168/ Instagram: instagram.com/psyc.hacks Twitter: twitter.com/oriontaraban Website: oriontarabanpsyd.com Orion's Theme: kzbin.info/www/bejne/jaO7c62HZ613e7M Thinking of going to grad school? Check out STELLAR, my top-rated GRE self-study program based on the world's only empirically-validated test prep system. Use the code "PSYCH" for 10% off all membership plans: stellargre.com. Become a Stellar affiliate and earn a 10% commission for every membership purchased by a new student you conduct into the program: stellargre.tapfiliate.com. GRE Bites: www.youtube.com/@grebites4993 Become a Psychonaut and join PsycHack's member community: kzbin.info/door/SduXBjCHkLoo_y9ss2xzXwjoin Sound mixing/editing by: valntinomusic.com Presented by Orion Taraban, Psy.D. PsycHacks provides viewers with a brief, thought-provoking video several days a week on a variety of psychological topics, inspired by his clinical practice. The intention is for the core idea contained within each video to inspire viewers to see something about themselves or their world in a slightly different light. The ultimate mission of the channel is to reduce the amount of unnecessary suffering in the world. #psychology #dating #women

[@RealHomeRecording]

How do we as men cancel the sale and avoid having our tires slashed?

[@etuitivemillionaire]

All 💃are 10s and they are all beautiful in their own unique ways. Not!!! Doc is trying to get cancelled. A lot of people don't like the truth

[@manishchandola6468]

@@etuitivemillionaire I don't want this channel getting cancelled or banned or whatever.

[@etuitivemillionaire]

@@manishchandola6468 I was being ironic.

[@BlissinaBlink]

@@etuitivemillionaireno his messaging is just off. He needs to tell women to take control of their climax to ensure they climax each time they have sex. And vet the man with words if he knows how to pleasure a woman and can ensure she climaxes. Women aren’t as motivated to have sex because it’s a gamble if they climax unlike men who get off 100 of the time. Complying with sex and it not working out because it wasn’t a curated experience is a sure fire way to kill motivation or sustainability in the sexual relationship. Women begrudgingly giving men sex to sustain the relationship or acting out of fear because he might pick someone else decreases the experience too, he can tell if she doesn’t have her heart in it, it’s not the same as a woman who is all in. Focus on the mechanics and permission of women’s sexual pleasure is the gateway to the end goal…not whatever this was.

[@95TurboSol]

My tactic on knowing if a girl is compatible with me is imagine her as a guy and or someone you find very physically unattractive, would you want to be best friends with this person if she were a guy? Or a girl that was very unattractive physically? Would you spend your weekends hanging out? I've met so many girls that I found attractive then imagined this and found the literal only thing I liked about her was her appearance. Try it and be amazed, it will save you much pain in your life if you master it.

[@elibennett6168]

I agree with your strategy, though it is not what the video describes about men who he says are hyper focused on one thing - it means you are going beyond outer appearances and looking at the person/character for the long term and also assessing your own motivation with each woman. Years ago before marriage, there was a handsome guy I was mildly interested in and we hung out with a group of colleagues after work a few times, never dated. Became totally turned off when I saw him be needlessly ugly and immature toward a waitress. It was like the future died because I saw the poor character behind the handsome face. I married my husband because I saw his easy-going, good character that meant a good life partner.

[@davidm8394]

@@95TurboSol 💯 this works for me everytime… part of why men suffer is because they refuse to allow themselves to perceive a woman without the allure of sex

[@mandaloin]

Problem is I met a girl just like that - truly, genuinely enjoyed being around her. We had tons of fun and laughed a lot together. But I just wasn't attracted to her and no amount of time with her changed that. I have yet to meet a girl who I both enjoy being around and find attractive.

[@95TurboSol]

@@mandaloin I feel your pain, I've only met 2 in my entire life that check both boxes, it's very special when you find it

[@jamesstark6703]

The saddest part is when they looked hot before you committed, they gave you everything you wanted - once they have you with a baby, they take everything away.

[@fivebooks8498]

I see most women leading with what the man wants and then taking it away once he commits.

[@maxk880]

Which is why you should never 100% commit. Sure, lover her, live together, make children. But always keep a part of you to yourself

[@Skate-Steve]

@@maxk880 hell no dont live together!

[@zellerized]

Ya moving in together is a rookie mistake

[@baffinsansterre]

She likely had no attraction in the first place.

[@wilfridjoseph6172]

@@fivebooks8498 this is facts

[@edwardsenesac]

My father was a salesman from the 1950's and said that we are all salesmen daily.

[@johnroberts1141]

Some better than others

[@undauntedthud6872]

My Grandfather, whiledating a woman younger than his youngest daughter responded to his grandson, "Grandpa Milt" He did not respond to just grandpa "What are you going to do when she turns 40?" Immediately he responded, "I will trade her in for two 20's." The thing is he enough had enough rizz, swag, and money to do it.

[@Ace.0.0.0.]

We are walking billboards. Everything we say & do shows people who we are. We can't hide it.

[@Gk2003m]

To a hammer, every problem looks like a nail. Good salesmen are generally clever, but rarely intelligent. Taking life advice from folks whose only objective is to grab as much of your money as they can is an irrational concept.

[@cynthiabauer5763]

@@Gk2003m you have a very negative view on sales, you must have experienced scams and trickery.

[@legiontepes3474]

Once again, Orion screams in the void. Women start from the assumption they are perfect and deserve everything. They have no idea or interest to learn what men want.

[@sammyb1651]

🤣Facts. Plus-in case it wasn't glaringly obvious-they're telling you what they want because that's all that matters (to them). And that doesn't change at any point during a relationship.

[@Valentina.Montano]

Is that why men are always telling us only our beauty and reproductive capacity matters? The problem is we don't want to focus on that, because we KNOW men can just divorce us and leave us with the children when we aren't so beautiful and young anymore.

[@MohamedTarikRochdi]

If one out of 200 or 300 heed this message. It means that we get two more happy people in this world and that's good enough.

[@conceptualclarity]

Problem is we have a culture that just about rules out the idea that there is any such thing as a bad wife. If a wife behaves objectively badly then the question asked is what did he do to force her to do that?

[@classic7033]

​@@MohamedTarikRochdi I think this is the point of the video. It's to educate the women who are trying to bag the men they want. Granted this doesn't necessarily mean it's a permanent solution

[@davidbowman2035]

Don't sell a product ... sell a solution to a problem. Listen to the customer.

[@kevinhornbuckle]

“You are the problem and I am your solution.” Best be pick-up line ever!

[@Beanp2025]

@@kevinhornbuckle That's cute!😂

[@experimentalgroup9473]

‘ Yes, I understand your need for my house and half my earnings, but what does that mean to me?’

[@TheAustrianPainter87]

😁

[@ShaunyP26]

I took half her earnings and all the shit in divorce. You don't have to settle for this, my dudes.

[@LisaCulton]

Most men can't buy a house unless a woman is paying half the mortgage.

[@experimentalgroup9473]

@@LisaCulton but they sure as hell can take half even if they don’t

[@NEONlights-lb8um]

@@LisaCulton that's not true. Some men can't buy a house without a woman paying half the mortgage. Not most. Most women won't even offer to pay half the mortgage.

[@JaySmith-pv2mw]

It's still astonishing to me that you have to tell modern women, many of whom are successful and intelligent, to actually offer men what THEY want in order for the women to get what they want from men. That means what men actually want, not what women THINK they want, not what women think men are SUPPOSED to want and realizing shaming men into wanting other things isn't going to work.

[@akulkis]

Yes, the old "And what's WRONG with a 300 lb woman with 4 kids by 3 different guys? If you can't handle that, you're not a 'Real Man'"...... shaming ploy literally never works.

[@Nethemas]

They've been raised to believe they're a trophy from conception, that the merit is already earned. Very few however can stand on the merits of their genetics alone.

[@Marcelube]

You bet!

[@standardofexcellence]

Much of it involves our needs, and many are on beginning level 1

[@firstnamelastname-ve9gj]

its backwards advice. the woman is hte prize not the man. most men are very immature and not emotionally developed - a waste of time

[@vv-cv6ud]

Once she is mad or in divorce proceedings she’s on mission to close your life

[@RealHomeRecording]

😂😢

[@CM-137]

That's why you have to defang the snake before you even start something.

[@bryanutility9609]

If she’s dumping you at because you deserve it. 😂

[@vv-cv6ud]

@@bryanutility9609 i dumped her

[@vv-cv6ud]

@@bryanutility9609 actually I dumped her before the level of nuisance crossed over me

[@ShonnMorris]

This is one of your best videos! I work in sales so it's very relatable to me. After hearing this being said, the explains why I don't bother with most women. Every woman I ended up getting into a relationship with offer me something first. Not just sex but they took the time to figure out what I like rather than making demands on what they want. I never entertain women who come across like that.

[@seetsamolapo5600]

Best book on sales?

[@timfisher1588]

​@@seetsamolapo5600how to make friends and influence people. Classic for sales

[@XristosArgyropoulos]

​@@seetsamolapo5600 "The psychology of selling" by Brian Tracy is a really good one

[@deanchur]

"Why would a guy want to date you?" "I have a high paying career, a house, a car..." "Congratulations, you became the husband you wanted, but why would a guy want to date the husband you always wanted?" Repeat ad infinitum...

[@ShonnMorris]

@@deanchur Facts

[@edelweiss5411]

If you don't realize you're a means to her ends, you're a fool.

[@Simeonsvids]

A fair exchange is not a robbery, she’s a means to your ends

[@fox1actual]

@@Simeonsvids100%

[@RichOrElse]

If you are employed, you are a means to your boss’s end, you’re a tool

[@cosmictreason2242]

Only way not to exploit each other is that your ends cannot be lesser (satisfaction, toys) but must be greater (God). Then it works

[@sid98geek]

​@@SimeonsvidsThe issue is that the amount (of money, effort, time etc.) sacrificed beyond which it seems like an unfair exchange is different for different people. Most people want to give less and take more.

[@UTJK.]

You are absolutely right! I met a girl who did exactly what you say: shifted in later age from being sexually promiscuous to wanting a serious relationship. She dated me and I always had the impression that me or another person would have been the same for her, as long as she obtained her relationship for the final goal to achieve the wedding.

[@Mereologist]

Which is not to say it's impossible to become the niche, desired product. And it becomes clear if we think of our own shopping purchases. It is probably true that any brand of toilet paper will be functional for wiping your backside, but every person probably has their one brand that they prefer. They may have started completely indifferent, but over time came to like one best. Which is also not to say to be wary for people who DON'T make that transition. Some people don't care and never will. Learn to distinguish your best customers from the others.

[@shanaevans-bassett1044]

Anybody with insecurities anywhere does that.

[@ElimEx1]

Men fall in love with the person, women fall in love with the process and the goals. The men are interchangeable.

[@bryanutility9609]

Yea I want the hottest youngest thing to have my children. If you’ve been with enough women you see how average they are all. Very little uniqueness between them & that’s ok.

[@bryanutility9609]

@@ElimEx1Men fall in love with hot sex & everything else is fake

[@ItalNico]

Some years ago I hired an online dating couch who helped me a lot. The one piece of advice I never forgot was when she stated that when creating your profile, always include a list of what you have to offer a potential mate. She was adamant in stating that far too many people (primarily women) focused entirely on what they wanted but said little to nothing about what they had to offer someone else. I saw it first hand across multiple dating platforms.

[@williamweb9782]

Spot on. Ego can make them talk about their achievements, they can talk about how they are the complete package. They rarely talk about what qualities they can bring to a relationship because they are using their own blueprint with regard to what they want! There is a real disconnect there.

[@bretbuckley704]

Even in person, most of the women I've talked to about relationships and asked advice from, it's always them talking about what they expect out of men. There's hardly any mention, if at all of what they have to offer in return, or how they reciprocate the man's efforts. It's always them putting the burden of fault on the man for not being good enough, despite all the good he does and not meeting *her* expectations - many of which were never communicated, we were expected to "just know" from the start. A lot of these women seek instant gratification and hold men to these egregious standards that they often don't even hold themselves to. The other thing I have noticed is a lack of problem solving skills among women. They would rather just throw away a perfectly good relationship over the most petty inconveniences, even if it's temporary or completely fixable.

[@bethechange9762]

I think insecure women don’t see what they offer…and from fear, they focus on what they need to get rather than what they bring and would like to offer. Hard to have a balanced view of both sides.

[@sa.sa3917]

As a woman, I understand you. In my particular case I got very sick. I wasn't looking, but ended up meeting a guy, who likes me and I like him, but he is proceeding very cautiously and I understand him. Talking to a friend, she said he wasn't worth it, after all, according to her, I'm incredible, deserve everything and how can he not see that? I laughed. How can I demand something, at least at this moment in life, if I can offer little to the guy? 😅 In fact, I wonder how he hasn't given up yet. Great guy, bad timing.

[@bretbuckley704]

@ Steady communication, affection, and reassurance goes a long way. I'm a more reserved type of guy...I guess that'd be close to being cautious too, so I hate it when people expect me to give myself away to a woman and make all of these super bold moves on them right away. Typically a more a cautious moving guy is less likely to give up if he likes you. I would also tell you to give him time and be patient. I've dated and been in relationships with women who gave up and went cold on me after a short period of time, I could tell some of them had an instant gratification complex paired with terrible communication skills. Don't do this, give him some green lights to make moves because when past exes went cold on me like that it just stressed me out, gave me anxiety, burned my confidence, and made it really difficult to feel inspired to do anything for them.

[@Lakshay.Vermaa]

"the cat decides what milk is good". Classic from Dr. Orion

[@jaimelabac]

🥛🐈🐈‍⬛

[@MC-ze8wj]

Honest question, are people usually this calculating nowadays? My husband and I met as teens not that long ago (15 years). We never had any of this on our minds. Like, I never once thought, " Better get the good cream out to sell him so he'll be hooked" sounds a bit cold. We just really liked one another and things naturally flowed from there; Orion seems to actually distill what happened pretty well (we got our needs met through one another) I suppose that's why we've gotten along so well, but laying it out like a trap just seems cold.

[@Hollowed2wiz]

​@@MC-ze8wj you were both lucky. The calculations usually happen subsconsciously (aka emotions and feelings). When you are lucky and in tune with your partner, you don't need to be that explicit about the process since as humans we are designed to excel in it. But when it doesn't work, you need to be more intentional, which is more calculating and less intuitive, thus this feels more cold. But overall, it's the same things happening, nothing as change since the past 100 000 years or so.

[@MC-ze8wj]

@@Hollowed2wiz Yes, we are certainly very blessed. You're right about it being subconscious. I have been thinking about it since I watched it this morning and I had a thought; I think also its that if you're well suited I think as a womn you would WANT to give him what he wants just as badly as he wants it from you and vice versa. This was my experience with my husband. We both wanted to give one another what we desired as much as the other. Trying to force it by being so calculating (like I will do this for him so he will give me x) seems like it wont work long term. Idk for sure because I've never been in any another relationship, but I suspect it's not going to end well if you dont what they want as much as they do. Just my 2c from my experience, don't know if I'm right but just what comes to mind from what I've lived. Perhaps if it never comes naturally trying to make a deliberate choice to please one another is better than being alone.

[@MC-ze8wj]

@@Hollowed2wiz idk why my reply was censored:(

[@alexleggett6270]

"Does this fit with your experience?" Why Yes..... yes it does !

[@wilfridjoseph6172]

Lol man your comment have me bawling with laughter

[@johnvienna3422]

Defo always always frickin does 😂

[@SRL1996]

I’m simple words, he’s suggesting every woman to be humble…what a Gem

[@TheAustrianPainter87]

Only father time can dish that out😊

[@tigre9271]

That's helpful.

[@timfisher1588]

They humble around early thirties.

[@smug9471]

Humble and their cake too

[@AnaSchultz-kx9tq]

Something that only creates problems for those who 😊.

[@ddleupriandboast]

Happend to me last month. Single mother of 40. Good looking, but cranky and wanted upfront commitment before even flirting. We spent some time together due to circumstances. But tensions rose because I had no desire to give her a commitment. In essence she says. You are not good looking enough to have a filing with. No thanks.

[@West1010]

She did you a favor bro, even if it was just a pump & dump in your eyes. I was with a single mother for 3 years, and will never do it again. Trust, trust, trust me it's not worth it.

[@runningwarrior5468]

Mother of 40??? That's alotta kids, bruh....😂

[@marktapley7571]

@@runningwarrior5468 I think the record is a Russian woman with 54.

[@Jeffaloo]

@@runningwarrior5468let’s hope he ment 40 years old haha

[@bungkusi2432]

A couple months back I found my old school mate, a divorcee, she said: "since we already know each other since school day, i think we should not waste time and can get married faster." 😅😅😮😮😮

[@hamilton7181]

Anyone else also get less and less interested in romantic relationships after hearing Orion's take on them lol. I love his advice though as it helps me dismantle my prior Disney like fantasies about women and romantic relationships, thanks again Doc for this gem, fellas we got find out how to get Orion on the Joe Rogan podcast!

[@bryanutility9609]

That would be epic. Men can have a family if they actually stop being weak. Most men doesn’t even know how to dress well 😂

[@jamescheaye927]

Lmao, yes, it does. But Dr. Taraban does a great job of distilling information and dispelling a lot of the rhetoric in this space that can be divisive. Like a lot of the talking points in the manosphere (Monkey Branching for example), Orion has done a superb job of explaining that in terms of labor and economics, and it helps you get over the resentment and forgive and move forward

[@frankberce5301]

Yes !

[@briangarvey83]

Yes. I'd much rather hire an "escort" than date.

[@ayoubthegreat]

@@hamilton7181 His perspective is very business-like and no one wants to be in a romantic relationship as a business. We get into romantic relationships because of our emotions and desires. Though it is important to understand the business and economics aspects of a relationship, it is not take away from the emotions. You can certainly have a woman who wants to give and love you openly and willingly and has more to offer than just touch or affection, but a true love and burning desire to have you and you the same for her. And it does not need to feel like a business, yet these aspects will still be involved in that, but it would not necessarily have to feel that way.

[@pkabzik]

most women are around 4..6 out of 10 - these type of sales people are terrified to close as they don't want to hear rejections. So they are just roaming around, beating around the bush hoping that a desperate customer would just purchase what they are selling, effortlessly. The fear of the anticipated rejection, my friends, is worse that the rejection itself.

[@AfriqueNY]

What you are missing is that they are still in demand. Billion dollar demand

[@jamescheaye927]

Correct. The rejection itself is actually releasing and liberating. But the anticipation of a failure one has concocted in their mind through irrational thinking, is just awful

[@ChickFenwick]

And how would you rate yourself? On a scale of 1-10?

[@pkabzik]

@@ChickFenwick I'm a piece of garbage. Nothing to see here lol

[@AfriqueNY]

@@ChickFenwick he looks average. Like the VAST majority of human adults

[@buttmankun]

The world is open to you if you can be useful and friendly to people you want things from.

[@EntertheGam3]

Well said sir!

[@tizodd6]

Maybe it's just me, but "Orion Taraban" is such a badass name.

[@dewaynerichardson5895]

It really is lol

[@jamescheaye927]

I don’t even know if Tarantino could come up with a better name for a character

[@derekgusoff6768]

I have a theory his parents were metalheads. He would have been born around the time the Metallica song Orion came out. 1986 or so.

[@nikholas7702]

​@@derekgusoff6768I'm so glad to see I'm not the only metalhead who made that connection 😊

[@hratchchaderjian-vb9pf]

Bad ass name all right. It brings your ears to attention for sure. Let's Go Orion...

[@Miquinee]

My pastor has arrived for the day

[@muscledpeanut]

I understand you 😂😂

[@yebzy]

i mean you should also be going to church tho

[@cosmictreason2242]

Get you some Voddie Baucham, doug Wilson, rc sproul, Paul washer, Joel Webbon, Brian Sauvé, these guys are patriarchal and from millennial to Gen x to boomer

[@travisstatik2573]

​@@yebzyA Pastor is not a psychologist

[@vinnievu1]

​@@yebzy Nah, most pastors these days are unreliable in terms of actually teaching the Bible, and I don't think they are good at leading their own households either.

[@ianlinares333]

maybe its just me but sex is just a pre-requisite for entertaining a relationship....there is still a long list of necessary atributes after it

[@immortaljanus]

Indeed. Some women might be aware that offer of sex would get them far but it completely derails them when they find out you want for more than that.

[@M0viLover]

Yup. A relationship without sex is a *friend*-ship.

[@carlosalbertogarbijr6212]

Getting sex at the start is never a problem, it's after marriage the problem.

[@rayrwyr]

Evolutionary instinct for a man is to have unlimited access to sexual opportunities so that he can spread his seeds far and wide. Evolutionary instinct for a woman is to collect the top quality Alpha male seeds and then find a Beta male (if her Alpha male does not care) who will provide for her and the children in exchange for some level of sexual access from her.

[@milenIV]

Orion did a video about his list of 4 prerequisites: 1. sex 2. beeing sweet 3. feminine and caring 4. EMOTIONALY STABLE ... something like that. And I agree

[@maximushung]

another nuisance not mentioned in this video (but he emphasizes in his book) is the same woman treats different men differently. the one she is fully attracted to, she never demands anything but does everything to please him. whereas a guy who marginal at best to her, she'll have a long list of things she demands from him. if you're the latter man, run as fast as you can because your divorce will be very costly because she never loved you but only you as a way to get resources she thinks she "deserved" - tolerating a husband she never really wanted to be with in the first place.

[@rayrwyr]

A man should choose a woman who is genuinely attracted to him.

[@lashedbutnotleashed1984]

@@rayrwyr It's a lot more complicated than that.

[@lucyburns4379]

He already did so in a previous video. I believe it's called The Law of Atttraction. You made a very good point about to what to do.

[@ak205]

Oh, yeah that’s advice applicable to me…

[@bryanutility9609]

@@lashedbutnotleashed1984it’s not that complicated if you understand attraction isn’t just physical

[@jackodonnell3463]

I have a lot of brilliant women as friends in my life, and we talk about tons of complex topics. I'm surprised at how little curiosity they have towards the male perspective. Men spend their lives trying to understand the female perspective. It's surprising to discover first hand that women have much lower interest in learning how men think.

[@ponygirlup]

I've been watching these videos for 2 years to understand men. It's been most enlightening and extremely helpful. Not just the videos, but the comments as well.

[@elainer8288]

Not true.I'm here trying to understand the male perspective better. And I know a lot of women that are curious and care too. Maybe your friends didn't feel comfortable asking you as a men.

[@E.P.7131]

Society conditions women to be self serving & self absorbed.

[@myvideosetc.8271]

They don't need it, and when they need it is too late.

[@jamessynnestvedt8369]

Thanks!

[@Papi-j2z]

As a male, sometimes I've haven't found something in the woman to close the collaboration your describe about. Many women don't have that much to offer other than kisses, a body and company? I suppose. It's very different when what drives your interest on someone is a deep common interest, being intellectual, existential o whatever. Shallow people have shallow relationships, shallow lives.

[@loalbdarija2307]

A man can live without a woman he just needs to pass on his genes

[@em5745]

@@Papi-j2z because that is the audience for what this video is targeting. transactional relationships, which is common for those either too ignorant to flesh themselves out in the dating pool. but tbh, it is very rare to find and you must cherish a relationship built on those mutual understandings. This video is good advice for men who need to get their needs met transactionally. Society doesn’t operate in the way by women leading with sex in order to secure a relationship, and it never should I.E: look at arranged marriages and marriage culture pre 1960’s

[@VivatVeritas1]

Look for wisdom, rather than intelligence.

[@mickdaggy4091]

Quality sells itself.

[@AnaSchultz-kx9tq]

Not quit. In a world of propaganda, those who don't advertise end forgoten

[@allynflinchbaugh4570]

@@AnaSchultz-kx9tq True. A quality product won't sell if nobody knows it exists.

[@Aaron281088]

@@AnaSchultz-kx9tq I'm sure anyone of quality isn't sitting in their mother basement never going out or interacting with the opposite sex. What he said is true. People of true quality don't really have to play the "game" of dating they just are and the opposite sex will come to them.

[@rizzamaeong]

​@@AnaSchultz-kx9tqso damn right. Obscurity is one issue

[@davidm8394]

Uhm not really hey😂😂… budget constraints are a very real thing

[@danielfcastro]

Orion never fails to deliver insightfull videos.

[@bobbys9853]

Sounds about right, I’ve said this time and time again. When I listen to women always talking about relationships and marriage, it’s always from a one sided perspective for what they benefit from (via marriage, kids, house, stability, emotional stability, consistency of presence, etc) but no woman ever mentions what she can do to maintain those benefits she desires. They have too much of a “me me me” complex.

[@paulsmith5611]

Very true but on the other hand I'm not sure I have anything special to offer her either. Women almost always have more friends and potential dating partners than men do so saying "I'm a good friend, nice guy, great partner, etc" isn't good enough. I admit that I'm done caring about random strangers and I'm certainly not going to uproot my life for a female that I hardly know. I have very little desire for anything more than a FWB situation but they are almost impossible to find and even harder to keep.

[@rayrwyr]

It works fine as long as she is very attractive.

[@rayrwyr]

@@paulsmith5611 -- Remember women want emotional experience from Alpha Chad and stable providership from Beta Brad. So tell her if you want to be Chad or Brad or both combined.

[@Chunkypooch]

@@paulsmith5611 I am a woman, and this is the honesty from a man I respect. You are correct in your reflection. Besides a man’s money and secure lifestyle they can provide, there is little a man can actually offer a woman that she desires. If you are so intent on your own gratification then pay for it. These services exist. FWB for a woman is pointless, but you already know this. Sex with most men for women is not even pleasant or fun.

[@say_ten_666]

@@Chunkypooch Yeah, as long as neither men nor women want children, we don't really have anything to do with each other at this point. Very few men or women will ever get what they desire, since by definition the majority of men and women are mid. For most men, dopamine from (video games + 🌽) > dopamine from your average (invisible) woman and for most women dopamine from (social media + girlfriends) > dopamine from your average (invisible) man. Dr. Taraban has discussed this as well.

[@ThomasBarone]

As a 59 yo man I see the brilliance of what you're saying because i watched and listened with undivided attention. I seriously doubt most women will finish half and of those that watch all of this video, 90% will have no idea what you mean.

[@plus41pseudonymus]

Every time I have the feeling that I don't need your work anymore, but every time it hits me the same way. Thank you for that

[@carlospita6442]

Yeah once they're done ridding the c.carousel, they get ready to settle down with a simp

[@Hdhfhhdh]

lol they still won’t settle for simp , they still expect a alpha. Even if they settle for a simp, women would resent him because they think they should do better because of their past

[@payamism]

Even at that stage, they try to optimize for the best available option. That by itself is normal behavior and makes sense. But, I have observed that women are awful at determining what will benefit them in the long run. As women are only loyal to their feelings at any given time, it comes down to their feelings about the options that they have at that moment. Ultimately, everyone is as loyal as their options!

[@bryanutility9609]

@@Hdhfhhdhgood thing I’m alway an alpha. Can’t imagine being only average.

[@SanjuktaSahoo-cm6uh]

God really made them weird ​@@payamism

[@zaq1337]

@@Hdhfhhdh It’s called the wife’s boifriend

[@faith9119]

This is so spot on! My girlfriends do not believe me when I tell them men are transactional. I'm also in sales. I'm 65 and in a 12 year relationship with someone who adores me. My husband passed but we had a long happy marriage. When you date relax sit back and enjoy him. Listen. He will tell you what he wants.

[@lout365]

When women do as he is suggesting, they usually end up disappointed because the man gives nothing in return and she feels taken for granted.

[@SteveJones379]

Apparently there's a lot of men willing to take what little women have to offer. Hopefully, as men educate themselves, the tables are turning. Thank you for the message! ☮

[@alexanderarcher9841]

Prior to the women’s movement, they all instinctively knew this and practiced it too. Something changed

[@akulkis]

What changed was the introduction Jewish propaganda into the culture.

[@bryanutility9609]

Yes men became weak and gave into their movement

[@dls95405]

They were trained by society and other women to think they're entitled to everything they want, as Orion just explained.

[@AnaSchultz-kx9tq]

They needed marriage to survive without jobs. Now they don't,so your days of being served are over. Deal with it

[@davbro9120]

They're married to the government now.

[@NotInformedOfficial]

Just bought your book right now. I'm excited for a good read. Thanks for the knowledge you are sharing with us Dr. Orion

[@ClinicianwithaMission-TinaGuid]

BRAVO 👏🏽 Orion! Keep speaking truth using behavioral science!

[@Laytonscott-k5k]

Exciting video, A year ago i took the no contact route, well i wouldnt say it didnt go well, but i missed her and sometimes you have to leave your comfort zone and go for what you want, Without knowing and having a huge ego, we might actually miss out on our soul mate all in the name of not settling for less, I know who i am, and at the same time i know what i want for me, so i did all i could to get her back, and I must say, it was the best decision i have ever made, we have been together again for over 7 months, yes marriage isnt always rosey, but i am lucky to have her, just as she is to have me, we compliment each other

[@EllaMila-g8t]

its difficult to let go of someone you love, i am in a similar situation, and i do not know what else do to have her back, i have been dying inside, people actually think i am happy, i am not

[@Laytonscott-k5k]

I feel your pain, after trying out the no contact experiment that failed miserably, i had to find other means, i had to reach out to a spiritual adviser, it was brilliant idea which i never thought it was, but it worked wonders for me.

[@EllaMila-g8t]

Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach him/ her?

[@Laytonscott-k5k]

Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters, and she is a great spiritual counselor who can bring back your ex.

[@EllaMila-g8t]

Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive

[@darrenheard9943]

Indeed, women enjoy being seduced by men. However, sometimes a woman's approach feels as though she's entitled to your interest because she's interested in you.

[@marcusmcgraw3519]

Some of us realize we’re so attractive we don’t have to try to seduce cuz we already do so naturally. That is how these situations should be played, not in a way that favors the woman like Orion is trying to frame here

[@timetheory84]

That is very true. One time some acquaintance women tried to set me up with another of their friends that came into the bar. I was on friendly terms with her. But I wasn't really attracted to her in that way. But when her friend asked if I would be interested, I sorta said 'sure', in not wanting to be rude. Anyway, I never pursued it or asked her out. A couple of weeks later, this girl that was interested in me just un-friended me on facebook. For one thing, if she was so interested in me, then why didn't she ever try to hit on me or come up to me and ask me out? So yes, entitled and had an overinflated sense of her own attractiveness. The friend that initially asked if I would be interested in her also eventually unfollowed me on instagram as well. We never had any drama or issue either.

[@darrenheard9943]

@@timetheory84 The sense of entitlement in dating can cause some women to feel insecure and vulnerable when they’re rejected. Instead of doing some self-reflection on why they were rejected, they may just deflect and blame men for their issues. Sadly. This dynamic happens a lot in society. The only person responsible for your love life is you. That’s it.

[@AnaSchultz-kx9tq]

​@@timetheory84Not entitled, they just didn't humiliate themselves like men wrongly are used to do. No one should insist in a dating, we try once and If atraction exists It works instantly. If doesn't,forget and move on. This is the best way to deal with It, men should learn that

[@AnaSchultz-kx9tq]

Actually most people who aproach think like that. In latin america men react poorly when rejected, get angry at the women. And that's ok as long as the person is not violent towards the crush, just ghost them and move on

[@robertfindley921]

I grew up without a male role model and mentor. Man, did that make it tough! It took until about age 23 to figure it out. I learned to toss the blue pill BS and all the useless and detrimental garbage my dorky friends and brothers told me. If I had an 11-year-old son, I would watch videos like this together with him, and discuss afterward.

[@msc8382]

" If I had a 11-year-old son.." And if you tell him to make up his own mind afterwards, you're golden my guy. I think you're onto something. I mean being there for your own kid doesn't sound like a bad idea at all to me. Saying that as someone who grew up without a male role model also.

[@Tim666-o5n]

If you figured this stuff out at 23 you did actually very well for yourself.

[@rayrwyr]

@@Tim666-o5n -- Yep. Most men die without ever figuring them out.

[@bryanutility9609]

My dad was not very helpful growing up. He died when I was 32, then I became a man. Got married the next year & had kids 10 years later. Wish I had woken up sooner. Using my older age & wisdom to raise my son & daughter with the mentorship I never had. ❤

[@Tim666-o5n]

@@bryanutility9609 Great job my dude, i'm 37 and just now really fighting my crippling social anxiety and addiction to distractions.

[@buoyantinthatnuance]

im a 19 year old from all the way from south africa learning the art of life here , so thank you

[@EditEvidence]

80% (at least) of life is learning all the tricks. be wary... only you can and will look after your interests.

[@pullshow..]

😂south africa 🇿🇦 where. ? 😅

[@buoyantinthatnuance]

@@pullshow.. just around Joburg , bet you from SA too mos' 🤣🫰

[@AviweZathu]

🇿🇦 EC

[@bryanutility9609]

When are you going back?

[@LetterSignedBy51SpiesWasA-Coup]

A narcissist will lead with what they want. A sociopath will manipulate to get what they want.

[@stagebloq6002]

Narcissists generally do both.

[@RoyalTeaLegion]

Either win or lose. There's no excuse to not be the best.

[@dontcallthemliberals3316]

Everyone is a narcissist at some point in their life, we need to chill out with the labels.

[@runningwarrior5468]

Covert narcissists will lead with charm.

[@runningwarrior5468]

​@dontcallthemliberals3316 you are right. Pretty much everyone under the age of 18. It's almost like it's a developmental stage that some people will go through, and some will stay in.

[@dhickey5919]

Thanks, Orion. As a man, I can appreciate what you're doing. I'd say you also hit an equally important point which is a woman's girlfriends and society feeding them bad information. This is perhaps the root issue and needed skill - discernment of the truth. This could be the holy grail of relationship success for many ladies.

[@IssacTrotts]

Thanks!

[@Isaiah-n1r]

That’s it! I’m giving up women. This is too stressful

[@stevechandler8847]

I had a friend (now deceased) who used to say men give love to get sex, women give sex to get love.

[@mykhaellb1826]

I approve of this title, instant understanding

[@banksofbarcelona3893]

He's helping women. They should lead with a product or service that can impact a man positively. Its much better than saying you're the table or you bring yourself to the table. A lot of men want the best for women. So they can have a fulfilling life. Not be abused by cold hearted people

[@marcusmcgraw3519]

Thanks for your common sense. When will men realize that Orion is keeping you in a game that favors the woman to capitalize on you? That way, when it inevitably goes wrong, you can go watch his videos to figure out why. This helps him, not men

[@BlissinaBlink]

I don’t know about that, I’ve made two comments that were respectful and they have been deleted. I suspect this one will be too.

[@banksofbarcelona3893]

@@BlissinaBlink it's censorship. Sometimes you can replace letters with numbers. I think he's helping w0m3n. Cos he wants women to live a fulfilled life. They'll do this by offering men something of value, that could add to men's lives. This is something women don't know

[@Chunkypooch]

He’s advising women to lower themselves for men who would never amount to them. Sometimes he has decent things to say… other times you get a window into his deviant mind.

[@bryanutility9609]

@@BlissinaBlinkYT auto deletes comments

[@TarkMcCoy]

Next week we'll be covering that pickup classic, "The Art of the Deal."

[@bryanutility9609]

That’s a nice country you have there, be a shame if it became the 51st state 😂

[@kirbythomas8637]

I wrote a book about the similarities between sales and dating and how the "toolbox" is very similar. So, when I heard your premise I was 100% in. I'm also a successful salesperson who was dropped into dating after my favorite person died. Closing often requires empathy in action from the salesperson and we get that to happen often with questions. We know where we're going with the question but we get there when they start to answer. Some women would benefit from a bit of "radical empathy" in the dating space but I find that too much narcissism prevents it from happening. When selling (or dating) it's good to take our eye off the commission (me focused) and put it on the mission (client focused). When they feel like I'm listening and responding it is very validating, and helps with bonding. It's quite basic when we build like that, and when we do close it feels natural. But only if it's done the right way. Good words, Doc...

[@kenosentity6455]

Most of them don't even know what they want let alone what their desired person/people want.

[@Boborion4]

Orion thank you for closing the gap between men women with each video you make.

[@donomar4815]

Orion Taraban has achieved the feat of producing top-quality videos while creating an extraordinary book on the same theme, but without saying the same thing. The value of others is one of the most lucid books I've ever read. I very, very strongly encourage you to do so. It's a huge pleasure anytime I open it. I really mean what I say .

[@markflierl1624]

The best advice I ever got was "lead the men and you will lead the women". It's so true. If men look up to you sooooo will women.

[@dcikaruga]

Problem with sales is that they're often selling crap, just scammers who work on appearances, although it can work, it's a bad idea long term because the product is exaggerated and usually fails to meet expectations. This is common with relationships as well, I can't find any other reason why it doesn't last long, same with men driving nice cars and wearing flash clothes but really don't have much in the bank. Even women join in as well with make-up, it's so superficial, but a good product is really what's important, especially in the long run.

[@marcusmcgraw3519]

Orion is a sales man for desperate men. He keeps you in the loop of playing a game that favors the woman, that way when it doesn’t work out, you can come back and watch more of his videos to figure out “where it went wrong”. This video is a good example of that. He takes all the pressure off the woman here with his framework, and this is what contributes to them having their heads through the roof

[@dcikaruga]

@@marcusmcgraw3519 He tries to be a realist - this is just how it is. All channels soon go down a path of making money and self promotion anyway, it's not about the subject anymore, it's about themselves and keeping the business going. And inevitably, they lose sight of what they were really about, then again, many dating channels here are just scames to begin with - picking on weak and gullible men, and taking their money.

[@marcusmcgraw3519]

@ I’ve seen your comments on Casey’s videos, and even though I’d say that sometimes you choose to overlook some of the points he makes, I have to respect your ability to notice the manipulation techniques used. Notice how much different (and more tolerable) Orion’s channel was before he went the direction he did with gearing it towards dating. You have to be able to examine the motive for his actions (and videos) rather than just looking at it by itself in a vacuum. You will paint a much more complete picture as a result, and it will tell you how to treat the matter

[@dcikaruga]

@@marcusmcgraw3519 If you care to study Zander more carefully, you should realize he's actually a very childish person, he's from a sales background and applies it to his channel. Really quite feeble minded, not very conscientious either, he understands appearances though but doesn't really know much aside from all the material he's obviously taken from other dating coaches. Orion is a psychologist by profession and does know the depths of the human psyche, a bit too mechanical for my liking, but he far more objective and clear headed than most other channels.

[@dcikaruga]

If you care to study Zander more carefully, you should realize he's actually a very childish person, he's from a sales background and applies it to his channel. Really quite feeble minded, not very conscientious either, he understands appearances though but doesn't really know much aside from all the material he's obviously taken from other dating coaches. Orion is a psychologist by profession and does know the depths of the human psyche, a bit too mechanical for my liking, but he far more objective and clear headed than most other channels.

[@munyadev]

I was afraid you'd be one of those YT Channels that tip-toe or sugar coat when speaking directly to females. You spoke nothing but facts, you've gained a new faithful subscriber

[@elibennett6168]

Well, that's what he intended. He's speaking to what you want to hear.

[@GregMunro]

Cool video, My relationship of 5 years ended a month ago. The love of my life decided to leave me, I really love her so much I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve tried my very best to get her back in my life, but to no avail, I’m frustrated, I don’t see my life with anyone else. I’ve done my best to get rid of the thoughts of her, but I can’t, I don’t know why I’m saying this here, I really miss her and just can’t stop thinking about her

[@GregMunro]

Amazing, how did you get a spiritual counselor, and how do i reach her?

[@GregMunro]

Thank you for this valuable information, i just looked her up now online. impressive

[@colaro4381]

You needed her more than she needed you. Next time make sure that’s reversed.

[@wildfeather]

Great! You're human. Now, maybe it's time to revisit how you think of yourself. Spend a week reviewing videos on Stoicism. You'll be over this in no time, and the better because of it. Allow yourself to mourn your loss. Understand, you are probable a beautiful human being. What she meant to you may be more about something you already possess inside. Again, it may be more about your own inner beauty than hers.

[@csanders4965]

Oh my god... this is the best advice. I can't believe I'm 56 and just hearing and understanding this..

[@kijkbuis2008]

Forget it men, you cannot satisfy a customer (women) that can never be satisfied.

[@bryanutility9609]

Then give your generics a funeral because you are not good enough to win in the game of life.

[@ottifantiwaalkes9289]

Partly cause they do not ever learn what they want. And sure are clueless about what they actually need.

[@crazzyross]

Straight Facts.​@@ottifantiwaalkes9289

[@emailsph3282]

Give them what they think they need... get what YOU want... then get out quick

[@missionlifemotion413]

You REALLY hit the nail on the head with this one, couldn’t agree more.

[@elpidalastname9834]

I love this guys stuff but I am so annoyed by the fact that his videos are likely pushed toward the male audience by the algorithm, so women don't see stuff like this. So much wisdom & he speaks in a way that makes so much sense.

[@LisaCulton]

We see it, but it's total nonsense. He doesn't understand women. Like this: lead with sex because that's what men want. Gross.

[@brendalalicker4855]

I agree completely and it suits both nen abs women. Once a young adult male complained about getting girls. That weekend there was a concert by a local but incredibly popular boy band, so I asked him if he was going. His answer, "no, that’s a show's for girls." Then I took out footage from Elvis Presley and the Beetles. Look! When do you think would be the best time to find a woman? When she is with her boyfriend or there, surrounded by other screaming women wanting a man?

[@TheBraunzone]

You can share it with women that you know .

[@brendalalicker4855]

@TheBraunzone shared it with two possibilities though In the opposite direction: Watch out for guys looking to find women under the influence of fame. If you're open to finding a guy, look for the one who's shows self-control and holds off the crowd to help you find the exit.

[@brendalalicker4855]

Like O. Taraban has often said though, young women don't usually ask about how to find a guy like young men do. The caveat takes the lead before introducing the "what to look for if/when".

[@RyazLegna]

I noticed your more intentional and less monotoned end of video “calling card”. Very well done. It actually made me want to listen again to the same suggestion to join the captain’s quarters because is sounded different than the standard catchphrase and seemed more like a genuine suggestion or persuasive effort. Like a conversation rather than a simple “like, favorite, and subscribe” that we all are so used to hearing. You do very good work and I look forward to seeing how else you adapt and grow. Big fan!

[@Avoid_Low_Frequency]

Ohhhhh! This one’s a good one!! It will take some getting used to on this idea primarily because this is not what I’ve been taught and told all of my life. I was told “don’t give a man what he wants early in dating.”

[@mikhassik]

I don't think that's what he's saying. It's not giving what he wants early in dating, but a promise

[@placer7412]

you fall into my "would" category anyway I can teach you all about what men want Am I doing this right

[@charles_pensamentocritico]

You don't have to give it early (although this is a strategy that can work sometimes), just that your "sales pitch" should acknowledge that when you try to close a deal, just saying "I want sex/long-term relationship" from the beginning doesn't tend to work very well

[@crazymonkeyVII]

Whether that's a good strategy or not really depends on the man and also on your past. No man wants to find out that you waited longer with him than with someone else. So yes, if you haven't been "quick" before, take your time, it's what makes you special. But if you've already had spontaneous ONS I'd seriously recommend against making *men you want to be with* wait. However, whatever the situation, you do have to at least acknowledge what you're selling. If you're selling a house, you don't necessarily have to allow the buyer to start living in it the next day. But if you don't at least acknowledge that you are selling a house, good luck with persuading the potential buyer to take out a mortgage and handing all his money to you!

[@ForceAlfaF1]

Giving it early is not necessary. What *is* necessary is being real about why the man is there and convincing him you will be real about it. Cut the good times to hassle ratio and don't demean and shame him over his sexual interest (God! Most women get each and all of those ideas stuck in reverse gear!) Any good man - - and most other men - - will bite that hook hard.

[@Turnsnap]

This was honestly helpful to hear as a man too, I too often ask for things without thinking what they get in return. And if im not willing to do the work to give them what they want, i should just stfu and take care of myself

[@etimspeed]

It's because the caller (initiator) is the buyer/payer. Women know this.

[@go4acro]

So awesome that your story always goes both ways and is always so clear when you talk Irion, now let's do this in real life.

[@skatecado2897]

This guy is cooking at full blast

[@morthim]

'can you imagine?' i've been in that call multiple times. at least 10.

[@michaeldinardo2519]

WIIFM: Whats In It For Me? Key to sales and women.

[@tamarathejudeochristianmedium]

I’ve tried to mentor young women and many just try to to get me to do their work for them. No one can do someone’s work for them, especially creative or spiritual work 🙏🏻

[@AnandaShreeAstrology]

Dear Dr Taraban, please if you care about people, make a caveat for those who are not falling into this entitled population. I'm an empathic woman (INFJ) who experienced neglect in childhood. I have been taken advantage by men more than once, who have targeted and used me for my money, energy and body. These experiences have been damaging for my self-confidence and left me in unfortunate situations. Advice like this can be a mind-f for woman in the trenches of abuse.

[@10towes]

Like he is saying. What's that got to do with him and us?

[@StingrayMk1]

I'm sorry about your broken leg. Good luck.

[@SmoothCode]

Most of my female peers love moving the goalpost to favor herself and her wants.

[@redoctober1498]

All of this is great advise but until laws change ( marriage laws, child support laws, alimony laws, criminal persecution of men for sexual desire laws, same persecution for the same crimes laws, equal legal opportunity laws, punishment for emotional abuse of men laws etc.), quality men will pass on it. This is a good video for beta simps who can’t get a woman.

[@emailsph3282]

The word is advice.

[@az_3kgt714]

The problem is women only think in what THEY want. Which is why they dont get what they want. They never think in terms of what he wants.

[@IamNana2022]

I am a woman. I love Dr.Orion's content. Its very helpful. Thank you❤❤❤

[@spilledit]

You using for manipulation ?

[@gitara2D]

All man know this since they end 7 years. :D

[@bryanutility9609]

@@spilleditI use manipulation all the time to get what I want. Why is that bad? I even manipulate people to get what’s best for them. 😂

[@perpetualprocrastinator]

@@spilledit That's how the world works, constant stream of benevolent,benign manipulations.

[@yeahrightbear8883]

My problem has always been giving women everything they want without them giving anything in return.

[@sumeet.]

After listening to this, I've had a deep realization that I did both of these things and in the end it was just a loss loss. Just change me in ways I couldn't know.

[@grinningchicken]

The problem is a misunderstanding of what the basic deal is. The woman gives the man exclusive sexual access and support in exchange for provision and protection. To close the deal particularly with a guy 30-50 yrs old she has to understand that if she likes some most of the other girls like him too. She has to show that she is the best option and understand that the days of being 20 when anyone who said yes to a 20 year old man was probably his best option.

[@edheldude]

I've noticed too. You can even have a discussion about it. They still try pushing boundaries and then you end it, and they cry, and you wonder what was even the point.

[@gregprince5283]

I would put it like this. Imagine you hiring someone to perform a service. They ask you to pay up front before the service or job is done. People are far more likely to do a more quality job when payment is given after the job. Paying upfront tends to send a message to the person performing the service results in a loss of ambition. People are far more likely to do better quality work if they know they have to wait for the payment until the job is done. This dove tails into the fact that women lose their ambition once they have secured marriage. They received their guarantee, so now they can pull back the reigns and lose ambition. They secured what they wanted, so there no need to try anymore

[@standardofexcellence]

Bait n Switch, Black Widow then get fat

[@bryanutility9609]

Most men become fat & lazy after marriage. They can finally stop buying those flowers & watch the game instead of going to the gym… oh what’s that, divorce? 😂

[@TheLayeredKing]

I feel like sales are dishonest and I'd rather find someone that shares goals with me than a relationship that's treated transactionally. If we don't have overlap in what we want, we're not a good match to begin with.

[@kenyanicholas6809]

@@TheLayeredKing exactly

[@andrewbakescakes9684]

Well said. The girls I have dated have lacked empathy. They couldn't imagine what the "customer" wants because they are too focused on themselves.

[@edheldude]

Yes, it's fully sociopathic.

[@andrewbakescakes9684]

@@edheldude - Yep. How my generation was taught the lie that girls are sweet and nurturing is beyond me. I sometimes think the boys of my generation were raised well by their mothers to be gentlemen, but the girls of my generation were raised to be narcissists by theirs.

[@edheldude]

@@andrewbakescakes9684 True. And boys were taught be acceptable and nice to women but not other way around, and they also weren't taught to vet women and look for red flags.

[@pascalHenrich]

This is by far the best video of this series. The truth of human nature that is unraveled here... just wow

[@nobody123-b5r]

I love you, man! I could literally listen to you talk forever. Please drop more videos, I'm curious about everything!

[@SubTroppo]

When the truth is comedy you know that things are really screwed up. I am reminded of that saying: '...first as tragedy, then as farce'.

[@detroitvcw]

Too egotistical, with a solipsistic mindset, and narcissistic tendencies. Thats why they haven't figured it out yet, although conceptually simple. I think some have a disdain towards men, a competitiveness, vendettas, or as i initially mentioned, narcissistic and theyre solely thinking of themselves which is most accurate.

[@bryanutility9609]

Most people are selfish. I’m slightly narcissistic because I’m just better than average. If you’re not, then you need to do better.

[@detroitvcw]

@bryanutility9609 You're slightly narcissistic? What does that mean, and because you're better than average, so that automatically means you can't empathize/compromise and be realistic. Play in your lane, end of story, don't over value yourself like narcissistic people do. None of what you said makes sense. You conceptually don't understand the concept of the video.

[@detroitvcw]

You're slightly narcissistic? What does that mean, and because you're better than average, so that automatically means you can't empathize/compromise and be realistic. Play in your lane, end of story, don't over value yourself like narcissistic people do. None of what you said makes sense. You conceptually don't understand the concept of the video.

[@deanchur]

@@bryanutility9609 Go spend some time around people who are better than you then, get some humility back and enjoy the process of turning it into confident humility. Life gets a lot easier when you can openly admit there are people more xyz-er than you; you no longer have to carry that burden of performance around.

[@runswithraptors]

Most everyone in our culture is taught to hate and be self centered from birth. No one loves anyone

[@orangeandslinky]

OOOOOOOOOHHHH man, you hit it out of the park this time Orion!

[@dsap4004]

This is completely incorrect. There are no attractive behaviors only attractive men. Women will tolerate you leading with anything you want if you are valuable to her. It's actually a good indicator of whether she actually likes you or not. If you can lead with what you want and she likes it then she likes you.

[@edheldude]

And that attraction is situational and temporary as she's constantly trying to disqualify you and trip you up. For men it's the opposite: we try to accept too much.

[@dsap4004]

@@edheldude The attraction is always there, how she feels about it at the moment is another thing entirely. Women have a way of feeling about their feelings. Once you realize there is no logic to it things become easier. Stop expecting women to be men.

[@jonblackwell9520]

This is why men are called to be leaders.

[@chasethehorizonx]

I'm happily married and I wonder if this guy is, as well. I was not interested in *convincing * my husband to marry me. No thank you. If you don't want to, there is no way in fuck I would dream of trying to convince you. A relationship is not a transaction. It is a collaborative effort. My husband knew he wanted to collaborate with me for the rest of our lives and I knew I wanted to collaborate with him for the rest of our lives, and we had the same value system, so terms didn't need to be negotiated. We just decided, and now our marriage has micro-negotiations like all relationships do, but I'm not "selling" him shit. I'm doing my best for him, without reservation, and he is doing his best for me. We didn't create a spreadsheet of who was going to do what.... We didn't need it because we were raised right.

[@jzemens4646]

'My husband knew he wanted to collaborate with me...' Sure he did. Lol Your husband knew he wanted to have sex with you sweetheart. Just sayin.

[@ncp321]

"*Everyone* has an important self-relevant problem". Exactly.

[@cjhickspe1399]

Just bought your book. Looking forward to reading it. Carry on.

[@coltonkennedy5826]

I pray that I find a lady that follows Orions advice

[@tbird12yt]

It's amazing that this needs to be said.

[@Sams911]

the dating market is fucked... why? dating apps... they need to be banned.

[@Cee_Eff]

As is the bar/club and other places one is supposed to meet women...same 💩everywhere

[@zacklewis342]

Or maybe just start calling them what they really are: Hookup Apps.

[@bryanutility9609]

@@zacklewis342as an introvert I love hookup apps. I hate being social & trying to meet people IRL. Who knows if someone is even single. Huge waste of time.

[@radixalpinguin]

they will collapse soon. even simps and cucks are waking up.

[@ShivaShaktification]

You are putting the cart waaaaay before the horse. Women don't even think about what men are getting out of a relationship. That would require compassion and trying to understand what it's like to be in a man's shoes on a day to day basis. That's impossible to do for anyone who is totally fixated on themselves 24/7

[@DuceOfClubs]

Not every woman is self obsessed, your statement is highly biased

[@marcusr3795]

@@DuceOfClubsyep true it’s only like 85%. Of them not all.

[@Raising_jennifer]

I’ve always dated like this, married like this until he came out as homosexual after 10 years. I’ve always asked how can I be of service to this man, how can I add to his life. I still ask this because this is the premise of a relationship, Ive always believed. Now I ask how can he add to my life, how can he better me. I originally thought if I’m good to him, he will be good to me. Nope, he will use you and go to a woman who wouldn’t do a fraction of what you did, simply because she is a “baddie”. Men complain about these dynamics but men actions say different. The very reason only fan girls are millionaires. Men don’t want good women. They either want the right to mistreat women or they insist on only fan girls to be good to them. 😂 Safe to safe I have no dates lol. What I notice is men and women are selfish, they are only looking to extract with little to no reciprocating.

[@say_ten_666]

Yep, it's always been this way, the internet is just revealing our true nature as mammals. We can use language and have tools, but, we're still just mammals.

[@sphericalspice]

@@Raising_jennifer Don't try to fool us! (And yourself.) You were a LQ wife and had chosen this kind of guy. You had cooked and cleaned for / after yourself, and when you took a shower, it's also for yourself. Now you want to sell to us it was for him. - Big BS!!

[@cosmicsea89]

Some women get it, others are oblivious

[@Yeeha494]

I’d say sex is crucial but even more: loyalty, respect, empathy for his suffering and struggles, exactly all the special treatment you want: you give to him, he’ll pursue you and commit. So be a good partner not just offer sex or something superficial. Also don’t punish the man for your past decisions, making him work for sex you offered random dudes for nothing or punishing him for supporting you by being disrespectful. Communication and honesty are a keeper’s traits. Women you wanna be with a keeper: be a keeper yourself. Respect yourselves and your partner and love them dearly or suffer the consequences of being bitter and alone.