you are not your body

[@autumnleaves-77]

I agree Merriam we are not our body we are not our jobs and we are not our gifts. I learned this as a child when I was at school. I was not one of the popular kids, and only had a few friends. Then one day, I auditioned for a singing part in a school play. I never thought I would get it and I was not competing with the other, more popular kids - I just did my best. And I got the part. Over night, those people who never talked to me came over and told me what a lovely singing voice I had. Teachers were suddenly a lot nicer to me, paying me lots of complements about my voice, and just kinder to me. I didn't understand as I was exactly the same person I was before. They should have always been nice to me regardless of wether I could sing or not.

[@kathystclair9485]

We are a soul that lives in a body.

[@catherinewalker4526]

As challenging as it is for anyone in any era to navigate one’s own body image, it was easier to grow up in the 80s. Having said that, it didn’t feel easy at all at the time and I really could have benefited from watching this video in 1985! Thank you Merriam!

[@zigm7420]

As someone with multiple autoimmune conditions, I struggle with this concept. I find it’s easier to identify with a self outside of my body when my body isn’t actively trying to harm me. At that point it’s hard to think about much else.

[@apatheliac]

I like to think that I am *not just* my body, and that I am *also* my body. Believing that I am not my body (at all) really made me unbalanced and ungrounded.

[@strawberrylove5684]

Definitely understand where you’re coming from, because I’ve been there too. Where indifference made me not take care of my body well. But these days I think of my body as a “gift” I’ve been loaned. I don’t get to keep it forever, but I have a duty to take care of the gift I received (my body) in the same way I’d take care of a car, if someone gifted me a car. I have a duty to show appreciation by taking good care of it

[@LalitasCreations]

I agree with this, growing up Hare Krishna, and then trying it on an extreme level, made me too much of a minimalist and disconnect to bothering with appearance. But these days away from focusing on detaching from the body, I think caring about beauty is a treat, and grounding, so I do it a lot now, but also not stressed if I gain weight etc and am at peace with imperfections knowing I’m not just my body. It’s a healthy balance of not overly identifying with the body but also not detaching from it. Enjoying and beautifying the body but not being burdened by expecting too much from the body 😊❤

[@daniellaastor]

I’m in the health and fitness space and all about loving your body (and I love fashion and style) and the first thing I share is exactly what you’re saying here - you are not your body. And so therefore the technical ways to get the results you want are totally freeing.

[@Su-kros]

Thank you for this! One of the best things I’ve ever heard was that our destiny and purpose is to live forever with God in Heaven. He didn’t make us to accomplish something in life, we don’t live to perform, He made us because He wants us with Him always. Knowing that has really helped me in life🙂

[@tianlandai]

Love this content from you! ❤❤❤

[@tearsofmina]

I like the thumbnail you chose--the "Alp" is a German shapeshifter that sits on top of a person, usually a woman, and invades their dreams to cause nightmares and stifle their lifeforce. This is a nice philosophic video; some of the concepts you chose to discuss remind me of Buddhism.

[@despoinastafyla]

Thank you for this video ❤❤❤

[@natalieyork956]

You are so wise. And I always find your words exactly when I need them Merriam ❤

[@French-Kiss24]

Here is an interesting experiment to try to figure out where You are. Close your eyes for a minute. Then focus on your ankle. Ask yourself, “Am I there?” Then go to your elbow. Focus and ask yourself if you are there. Then focus on different parts of your body and ask if you reside there. After a few minutes, you laugh and realize You aren’t there at all. So where are you? That’s the whole point.

[@frenchy6115]

Well said.

[@strawberrylove5684]

Well said! 💖

[@EniloracCodes]

I totally agree with you, Merriam. We are not our body and we actually are not even our mind, but that can be a difficult concept. Anyway, I agree that understanding your body type and colors is freeing…it’s not even all about what you look bad in, it’s more about how you can look your best and who wouldn’t want to know that???

[@daniellaastor]

Agree with you fully.

[@SunblushStyle]

I was thinking about that the other day! I think it all has to do with people wanting to identify with a group or a movement (Pro-ana or Tess Holiday). Human beings want to belong in a tribe that values friendships, emotional support, and self-esteem. That is why it is more apparent nowadays since social media is the new “third place”. Thanks social media, there are so many “movements” and “clubs”.

[@JR-sx3gl]

It definitely was freeing for me. 1) as a Rounded/ Romantic I really struggled with how to dress as a young person, because I couldn't understand why I look so awkward in the styles other girls were successfully wearing. I thought it was my fault. I was maybe too fat (I was healthy weight, but not skinny), maybe not athletic enough. I was being shamed for having a bigger bra cup, which made it more difficult to look good in what I understand now were either Natural or Gamine lines 🤦‍♀️. Knowledge is power. 2) But a Romantic is "supposed to be" that coquette, desirable woman. It's not me. Wrong. It's just lines, patterns, fabric recommendations and you reflect your own personality, values, preferences through. You're not a copy of Marilyn Monroe. You're just a similar shape. You're still you and it just gives you a tool to present yourself however you want. 3) No pink for me, please. I gravitated to cool colours, didn't like pastels. Again I was judged for "not being like other girls". I'm not "extra", it turns out I'm a cool undertone and thanks to Merriam I know I am far into that vibrant, bright cool side of the spectrum. This system is genius. 4) Even among one type there is such diversity. Understanding your essence will help you with not only choosing your wardrobe, but learning about yourself. This knowledge is freedom for many of us. Now I can really express myself, the me inside to the world outside. Maybe some people know this instinctively and think it's just a waste of time. It's not for many of us. Very grateful to Merriam for what she's doing.

[@katitax508]

Important reminder!

[@SnugEmsCats]

Merriam, I love your channel and the ideas you share, but I have to disagree with the phrase "you are not your body." I believe we are our bodies, and we thrive when we listen to and connect with them in a deeper, more spiritual way rather than through a superficial lens. I have a holistic view of the mind-body connection-for example, how something as simple as drinking coffee can make us feel anxious. Our physical and emotional selves are deeply intertwined, and embracing this connection helps us achieve greater self-acceptance. I also agree that developing a personal style is more about the mind/personality/spirit. Style is a way to express who we are, and we can highlight any personality trait we want, regardless of the shape, color, or tone of our skin. That is a message you've driven home for me and I am so grateful as I used to view style as mostly superficial. For me, saying "you are not your body" risks encouraging further dissociation, when what we really need is more attunement to our feeling selves-which, yes, includes our bodies. As always, thanks for the thought provoking content! 🙏

[@JohannaJalonen]

If you have grown up listening your parents judging women’s appearances on TV and almost everywhere, it is impossible to get it out of your head that other people might not judge the way you look, everywhere, all the time. And therefore - like you encouraged in some previous video - it is essential to try to look your best 🤔 Because the world is tough, people are judgemental - and even if they actually were not, your appearance is still the first and often the only thing they base their opinions about you.

[@vedskameditace108]

Merriam, i love you videos. However, i find the underground music really disturbing. You have a beautiful voice and lots to say. There is no need for anything else. Thank you!

[@AbstractMindsThinkAlike]

I agree

[@katblu2870]

Thank you for bringing this topic up. I find that beauty as a value has taken a back seat in today’s world. Very unfortunate. If you have not yet seen a documentary by BBC Scotland - Roger Scruton, Why Beauty Matters, I highly recommend it.

[@merriamstyle]

I actually have seen that and I enjoyed it! Thank you for mentioning it.