“You’re Probably Not Going To Like My Answer”

[@SunilU-z8p]

Never tell people how much money you have.

[@unfairsanic5089]

Or never be a walking confession in a first place

[@BREEZYM6015]

I have $____.00 to my name. 😂

[@nicholasselke5214]

@airthrowDBT I don’t tell most people I know where I work or what I do for a living. If someone asks me where I work, I say “at my job”. They don’t work with me so it’s really none of their business

[@erikmarchese4290]

Otherwise they will rationalize somehow that they are entitled to some portion of it.

[@kay88188]

Yeah, people will find out where you work, where you live and what you have(car,etc) which they will use to estimate how much money you have and they will borrow or not based on that.

[@outsidethebox262]

I listened to a rich guy once, he love loaning people in a small amount. If that money doesnt come back, now he knows who to keep outside of his circle. He actually budget this.

[@jomaoliveira7949]

Sounds to be a very wise man.

[@stephengamber6233]

A test to see who's irresponsible and untrustworthy.

[@Shortballa11]

Very smart. They ask for $500 loan, and you contribute $50. You don't lose sleep, but still helped out and see what is what.

[@maryannanderson2213]

I have a ne'er do well cousin who was constantly hanging around my brother pestering the life out of him wanting "money for a cup of coffee" or "a ride to town" or a "gallon of gas". There was never a huge amount but it was just constant annoyance. He came one day and needed to "borrow" $50.00. My brother gave it to him. He told me, "It's worth it to me to never see him again." and he never did. They lived in the same small town and if they met our cousin would wave but he never again even attempted to have a conversation with my brother. The $50 was just gone with the wind and my brother considered it the best money he had ever spent!

[@fightsportspace7327]

Careful with this method. Still take into account what you’re okay losing. Some people will build trust with you by paying back the small amounts and then hit you with a BS story for a much bigger amount. And since you trust them, you’re more likely to fall for it.

[@joefroelich4934]

Never loan money that you wouldn’t give away.

[@tristan2332]

100% correct. Whatever you "loan" be ok financially if you never see a dime back cause that's likely going to be the case.

[@AsadoMao]

If you would give it away, just give it away

[@froggore52]

Correction: "Never loan money."

[@alejandrarivera1087]

💯

[@BREEZYM6015]

If you're giving it away then it's not a loan. 😂

[@anthonydavis6027]

I quit lending money a few years ago. Nowadays I ignore every request for money no matter how sad their story is.

[@TheAustrianPainter87]

But my daughter has lupus. Can I hold 2k? 😁

[@gundam0039]

It's why America is in trouble now. These leeches screwed up their lives. Then decided to pull others into their crap. It spread like a plague. The fact that Dave himself mentioned the lesson is proof enough. Evil people who knowingly took loads of student loan debt 50k, car debt 60k, divorce debt and think it's okay to pull someone in who has little to no debt (5k) and royally screw them and get them to spiral out of control from all the stress they put them through. No matter though, we 4 who were given the title will get them all.

[@PoyTroy]

People ain’t asking me . Cause I have “none”. They say whenever someone as you for money, you just say the same thing back to you , like “ I was just about to ask you “ lol

[@daveid6244]

Absolutely unless you g I t more than uill ever spend look after yourself help ur kids other than that no

[@darlateegarden7595]

Yeah it's best to just give it away if someone is truly in need and you decide to help

[@gammayin3245]

"The secret to happiness is low expectations." My favorite Dave quote so far!

[@Ryan_DeWitt]

Mine is similar, although not a Dave quote. If you always assume people will act in their own best self interest, you will go through life a lot wiser and less disappointed.

[@daltonbrasier5491]

High hopes, low expectations"

[@Anonyme67]

My husband quote

[@wfm125m]

I told my wife this many times when she was pissed off at me :D

[@privateprivate8366]

Never knew he quoted that. I’ve always said, it’s low expectations and standards. For me, Hell is other people, so I get more happiness being alone. Others need to have low expectations also, since they’re not getting anything from me either.

[@mikemcconeghy4658]

"You are thinking about it, they aren't." So wise. You can apply that to a lot of situations.

[@4862cjc]

1. People who are responsible with money will not borrow it from you. 2. People who are irresponsible with money will ask to borrow it from you, and they will not pay it back. Why do you think they ask you? Because they have bad credit and a bank will not lend to them.

[@kathyporch7195]

#2. Again and Again and Again. Ugggghhhh

[@b4ph0m3tdk9]

This is true both #1 & #2

[@BanjoPixelSnack]

There are some people who are bad with money but when they borrow it they do pay it back. I've lent my aunt money before and she has repaid me. Lending a few hundred is one thing, lending thousands is another!

[@privateprivate8366]

Sometimes, people will ask to borrow money, specifically because they plan to not pay it back and the money is worth the lack of consequences and losing a friend.

[@PublicNuisance2K25]

His wife suggesting he lend money to her family is a major red flag

[@TimothyNyota]

exactly

[@C420sailor]

Yep. Wife is using you as her family’s bank

[@TheSouth-j7f]

That is what I thought straight away. Yikes.

[@Gizziiusa]

gold-digga by proxy.

[@davidOConnor-z3l]

I think she’s in cahoots with his best friend and they’re $5000

[@jonajacket]

I ended up in a dire situation during lockdowns. My brother lent me close to a years salary. It got us out of a spot and I was entirely grateful. I went rice and beans and paid him back within 18 months.

[@alanparedes2034]

I always complain to everyone that I'm strapped for money. Twice in my life did I tell friends that I had some extra money in the bank. A few months later, they both asked me for a loan. Luckily for me, they both paid me back. I learned another lesson. Even to good friends, always act like you have no money.

[@ToOpen6seven]

Yep, I had one friend who I would loan more to quicker than any family member. She paid me back 100% of the time and that is why we are still friends.

[@Shortballa11]

@@ToOpen6seven Yea majority of my friends pay back loans, but its also why I don't give big loans because its less likely to ever see that money again.

[@kevinerosa]

I had to get off social media. I will post a sale or a trip im taking with the family. It will immediately be followed by friends asking for money. I learned my lesson to never tell anyone what I have.

[@sensimania]

Yup! I noticed that people will definitely store that info in their memory bank. Sometimes it doesn't even take months for them to ask. I've had people ask in a matter of weeks (or even days) with some sob story - after learning I had some extra cash. Funny how the sob story didn't exist prior to that.

[@MrX-zz2vk]

​@kevinerosa And if you do go on a trip, never tell all those fake "friends" on social media that you are on a trip, and don't post pics from that trip until you get back. Or tell them you're going on said trip in advance. Because otherwise, you're just broadcasting to everyone who might see it that you're away from your unoccupied home for X amount of time. Not a good idea.

[@thegodblogger3812]

Wife told hubby I KNOW YOU'VE GOT THE MONEY. Wifey is totally in on the scam.

[@Shortballa11]

I doubt she is in on the scam. Just naive lol

[@gundam0039]

​@@Shortballa11That's what you think. Edit: May knowingly or unknowingly.

[@OldManAndTheSeaOfTooManyCats]

Definitely is. And just wait for the follow-on crises that she’ll expect hubby to rush to the rescue.

[@criticalthinker1123]

Oh no why are you guys so materialistic?

[@sagemathew9740]

He STILL married her. Red Flag.

[@jvsaints]

Yep. My husband "loaned" his sister $12,000 and she never paid it back. She did, however, buy new furniture for her house. Made me so mad to see her treat him that way. I can't believe people treat others this way.

[@fire12731]

Shame on your husband and your sister in law too

[@s.m.4198]

My sister asked me to help her to pay her electric bill after bragging to me about some stuff she bought. I told her hell no. 😂

[@Neddie2k]

It’s his sister, stay in your lane.

[@thetaekwondoe3887]

What did she SAY the money was supposed to be for?

[@Shortballa11]

The worst is loaning a friend money and then you are out with them, and they spend way more money than you.

[@daveblackman816]

Bro will never see that 8k again.

[@jimmymcgill6778]

The 5k, sounds like a gift.

[@DefinitelyNotRin]

Rule #1 , if you loan out money never expect to see it again

[@Ryan_DeWitt]

Well, I think at least now he understands why his mother in law was pissed. She didn't take any crap and was demanding to be paid back. Ironically she was, with this dude's money.

[@woohan6430]

I loaned my older sister 50 bucks when I was 15 Never saw it back Learned my lesson

[@tinaduncan72]

I have no problem saying, I don't think I can do that.

[@Dstuff44Duval904]

Always refer family and friends to the bank for loans.

[@mnoble247]

Tell them you have no idea how to go about the paperwork or a credit check works so they are better off going to a bank. When they tell you the bank wouldn't lend, ask them why they were turned down. When they go "I dunno' you can tell them 'I dunno' is my answer to your request also.

[@JenniferNewLife144]

😂

[@phased3941]

​@mnoble247 or you could just say "sorry but no" instead of climbing up on that high horse and being a condescending asshole lol 😅

[@LisaLisa-in4vw]

People need to use the word NO alot more often!

[@Sheryl777]

👍

[@adrianm296]

“a lot”

[@tofu5259]

This lesson cost me $22,000 at age 19. 24 now, and it was the most powerful lesson I've ever had today

[@d_all_in]

What's the story behind that amount? Seems like a lot for a 19 year old.

[@tofu5259]

@d_all_in After high school, I worked the night shift at a saw factory 60+ hours a week while living at home with my mom. Ended up saving a lot of money but didn't know how to take care of it. I gave it all in cash over just a few months to a new 'team lead' from Italy that begged me to help him or "bad people were going to hurt him". Guy was convincing and said he would pay me back. Turns out he was a coke addict that scammed me and several other people at the factory, and the bastard dropped contact and moved to Florida. I was so stupid that I went behind my family's back to help him and ended up in a mental hospital. I had a lawyer take my case, cost me another 3 grand, got a lean on his house he cosigned in Massachusetts, but they went into foreclosure, so I just wasted my time. 5 years later I'm out on my own working a new job, taking a different approach to life.

[@miamitten1123]

You d0ughnut

[@thesuperdingos]

Never call it “loaning” your family or friends money. You’re giving it away for free.

[@Massivemonster1234]

Sad, but so very true.

[@socku5850]

If he ask for less then $100. I would give it as a gift. No need to pay me back. But, for a over $5000 no way.

[@richardwallis9374]

I’ve done this once for a friend. I got collateral. He signed his 6000$ car over to me for a 5k contracted loan. He paid it back and I gave the pink slip back. I was ready to keep the car and lose the friend. I’d never do it any other way. Better to just not do it tho yes. Help where you can and in other ways.

[@davidOConnor-z3l]

I’ve only had one experience in over five decades in my younger brother asked for $600 for his rent so I gave it to him no problem because I have it and I love him but I don’t expect it back and I’m not gonna ask but he knows he can’t ask anymore

[@gracewithouttears3687]

BTDT. We wrote off $10K years ago as a loss when we realized a friend was NEVER going to pay it back. They were able to fly to Europe multiple times but couldn’t pay anything towards the debt. We never told them it was forgiven and it has now been probably 25 years and they’ve never mentioned it once. Lesson learned.

[@deirdrekiely6187]

Did you ever ask for the $$ back?

[@HOLDXSTEEL]

Dude ask for 30k and say the extra is interest 😂

[@mine4532]

Are you all still friends?? Just curious

[@ToOpen6seven]

If I loan someone money and they don't pay me back, they are no longer my friend. Even friends, when times get tough and they cannot, will let you know and make alternative arrangements. I use to be the ATM, not any longer. I adopted the, 'I cannot loan, but I can give...' motto, and these people continue to have their hand out. I am not rich. I am a single mom of 3 and now I take care of my mom with no assistance. Who is going to loan me money to pay my mortgage when I cannot? No one!

[@thomasorchard]

What is "BTDT"? And are you still friends with this person? (I hope not.)

[@wittenberg5]

The flip side is if you give someone money and then they voluntarily pay it back, you are pleasantly surprised.

[@noelaird3273]

I learnt a long time ago that lending money is like going to a Casino, don't give what your not willing to lose.

[@Sheryl777]

👍

[@nicholasselke5214]

Or if you are willing to loan money, require it to be secured with collateral

[@davidOConnor-z3l]

What’s your name does the Cyclelogical Hill advantage of money as it makes you feel powerful that makes you feel God like you feel so good and I/they think your God when you’re doing that at that moment in time

[@RGTomoenage11]

Never tell people you have money. Keep charging them.

[@Shortballa11]

Ive done this in small amounts $20-$200. Majority repaid it back, but still about $400, I've never gotten back. Ive forgiven the debts and stayed friends, but the respect level is definitely lower. Forgiven, not forgotten.

[@percivalgooglyeyes6178]

I learned early on when someone starts to hem haw and start to ask me for a loan I say; "oh man, I was just trying to get up the courage to ask you for money!". It shuts it down every time. I've even used it on the "parking lot panhandlers" with effective results.

[@jorgerojas1576]

I lent 10 thousand dollars to different people that was never paid to me. I learned the lesson

[@BillMelater-o8n]

A lot of times people aren't actually asking for a loan, they're asking for a subsidy for bad habits.

[@davidOConnor-z3l]

You leave addictions out of this!

[@coopernecole7962]

​@davidOConnor-z3l maybe he meant bad money habits .

[@Astro95Media]

My parents loaned me the cash for my divorce eight years ago so I wouldn't need to owe interest to a bank for it. They simply said "Pay us back when you can". Once the dust settled and I finished paying off my student loans, I paid my parents back in full expeditiously over the course of a few months. They had every penny come back to them.

[@zwieback1988]

This is what normal people do. I would not have a problem in paying back my parents if they lent a big amount to me. Important for me would be clear expectation on both sides. If they sit there and comment every buck you spend on something instead of paying back faster, this will hurt the relation as you than need to hide things. If it is defined to 500$ per month and you hit that or are above they can not judge

[@pamsmith1665]

Should have paid your parents back first

[@zwieback1988]

@@pamsmith1665 depends…. On how much the rely in the money and what interest is on the loans. If the would earn more at the same time you should pay them back before, otherwise and if they do not need the money at the moment it is ok to pay off the loans first. After all most parents like to support their children.

[@wfm125m]

​@@pamsmith1665parents know that their kid will be better off not paying banks extra than them.

[@pamsmith6890]

@@wfm125m Their "kid" is now an adult and mommy and daddy need to stop. The real world isn't going to wipe their noses or their asses....

[@TCR2025]

Stop trying to be a hero.

[@davidOConnor-z3l]

When the loan was approved she gave him very hot sex for that night

[@bfrandsen1]

I had this same experience. Paid $2,000 on the "family loan" and carried anger around about for 3 years before I was able to let it go. Absolutely learned that lesson.

[@davidOConnor-z3l]

you have to let it go because blood is thicker than water,,,Even though they may owe you money when push comes to shove they will have your back by DNA and genetics alone hopefully

[@mcsd1250]

I have learned to never loan money. However, if you feel you must help your family, friends etc, always get collateral. Guns, game systems, vehicles with titles (you hold both). I have learned that when most people find out they have something to lose if they don't repay the loan, they suddenly no longer want your help.

[@johannesswillery7855]

Lol that's great advice! I have more bicycles and fishing poles than I know what to do with from short term loans. And have sold the guns I got as collateral.

[@zakkrick]

Family and cousins never pay me back for the last 20 years. They always get mad at me if I bring it up. This is why I went into credit card debt. Now that I’m debt free I will never trust them anymore

[@JustinCase780]

His wife thinks he's an ATM.

[@tonytoni1150]

A lot of them do..

[@siva47931]

Same with Dave's, Sharon hasn't worked a day in her life

[@djpuplex]

​@@tonytoni1150Mostly all of them do.

[@SJtheMFZB]

​@@siva47931It's not fair to put Dave's wife in this unless he's remarked as much himself.

[@Sheryl777]

@@SJtheMFZB 👍

[@louismat319]

If you loaned 20$ and never see that person again, that was 20$ well spent

[@miajean352]

Wow! Well said. I love the way you looked at that!!!

[@gundam0039]

Wrong

[@gundam0039]

Don't give em a damn thing.

[@Jim_Curtis]

Dave forgot to mention to the guy to not be suckered by his wife into doing things he should not.

[@TonyCox1351]

Yeah people definitely put themselves in these situations. I’ve never had to lend anyone money in my 39 years, and somehow this guy has found himself lending money to multiple people

[@kbanghart]

He didn't forget to mention it, he said to talk to his wife.

[@Jim_Curtis]

@@kbanghart Talking to her and getting suckered by her are two different things. He's still likely to get suckered by her if he doesn't get a backbone.

[@deirdrekiely6187]

New marriage = guy won't do anything to piss off his wife. Whipped.

[@deirdrekiely6187]

​@@kbanghart She was pushing him to lend money.

[@davidmercado2329]

Never do that. It’s a terrible mistake doomed to disaster. If you lend to someone, word will spread, and more people will come to you for loans.

[@Chele-nm4qx]

I don't understand why the generous person ends up being the bad guy in the end- so why bother being their saving grace by giving them money!

[@moistpeanut5986]

Never loan to family or friends. Just give it as a gift.

[@EricMoore790]

Money hurts relationships.

[@lovebugsg84]

Yes it does

[@georgewagner7787]

Just say , i don't have it to spare

[@todd2456]

That's called a simp tax.

[@moak08]

His wife going to clean his account before divorcing him and taking half his assets

[@Sheryl777]

@@moak08 If she's going to do that, she'd better do it before he runs out of money due to giving it all to people outside the family.

[@pyronixe]

Todd has over 100 comments on this channel, 0 are constructive or worth reading.

[@Sheryl777]

@@bobjames6622 👍😂

[@shannonobrien9922]

Dave calls it The Stupid Tax!!!!

[@kevinerosa]

A buddy asked me for "3,500" because he was in a mess. He didn't tell his wife and reached out to me because he didn't want to face her. I offered him a gift of $100 and a copy of TMM. He never spoke to me again 😂

[@l.w.c.2519]

Wow some “friend” huh!

[@SteveSabbai]

1 out of 10 "friends" are Real." -Steve Sabbai

[@dougf9900]

Dave is right. The relationship has changed. You will never look at those people the same regardless of whether they pay you back eventually or not. He's also right to say that those people aren't thinking about repaying you at all. It never worries them even for a moment. They are already scouting out the next sucker to borrow from. You are in the past. People who go around borrowing money are only thinking of the immediate situation. They have no ability to think about long term consequences. They certainly aren't making future financial plans that include paying you back.

[@thesewingeyedoc]

I made that mistake with a so called friend that I have known for over 35 years, but I loaned only $300. But never again…and this person is no longer a friend.

[@Shortballa11]

$200 for me. Never got the money back, and never mentioned it again. Still friends, but the respect level is so much lower.

[@reese85]

$300 bucks ruined a 35 year plus relationship, seriously?

[@KjtheGreatPro]

Can we all chip in and pay for the 300 and for you to have a heart transplant to forgive a 35 year long friend for a mistake.

[@reese85]

@airthrowDBT if you actually knew me in real life, you’ll kno I’ll have no problem giving someone $300 bucks and I def! Wouldn’t let that come between a 35 yr plus friendship!

[@nicholasselke5214]

@reese85 all of my friendships are predicated on accountability and trust. For that reason, if someone borrows money from me and doesn’t pay it back, they have broken that trust and have made themselves disposable to me. If someone wants to be in my life, I demand that they keep their word. And when they temporarily can’t, they need to reach out to me directly with a plan to get back on track with their word

[@mrcrowleyoz]

Always know who you are lending to. Help people who are really struggling, not for people who keep mismanaging their money.

[@s.m.4198]

I used to share with everyone whenever I got a promotion or a raise. I’m the second person, after my dad, and the only one of my parent’s children to graduate from college and build a career. I was always so proud of my achievements that I would announce every milestone. Looking back, I realize that wasn’t the best idea. When I would say, I don’t have the money (even though I did), they would say I didn’t know how to manage my money. Now I just say no, and I’m ok being a villain in their eyes.

[@joshuawilliams6153]

I lost a elementary school friendship over loaning money. I think what got me the most is that I did not ask for the money back I think his guilt led him to basically stop talking to me/avoiding me. Never again

[@vickieclark5931]

If you can't afford to give them money, then you can't afford to lend it to them. I would just let it go and use this as a learning experience. I've done that in the past. Fortunately, it wasn't 8K, but it was a couple hundred dollars. I just forgave it and NEVER let anyone borrow money again.

[@b1crusade384]

2:59 loaning money does not create a master/slave dynamic. It’s create a swindler/sucker dynamic.

[@ditttch]

Not paying it back is the same as them stealing it from you. Now you know what kind of people they are so write them out of your life and move on. Expensive lesson .

[@Ella-Bella2024]

I'm not convinced he realizes his mistakes. He's a poor judge of character. His wife doesn't sound good at all. She sounds like a user and can't be trusted.

[@elizabethashton9590]

I agree with Ramsey on this one. Start lending money and it will never stop and you'll grow bitter and resentful because you won't get it back.

[@LNCMD2023]

No. It is not the borrower who is the slave. It is You who loaned the money who ends up as the slave. You end up begging him or her to pay you back the money especially if the borrower is your close friend or a relative. They will give you all kinds of excuses why they can’t give you back the money now, maybe next month and so on.

[@MiscellaneousMeMe]

I had a ‘friend’ when I was in college that I leant money to. After several months I asked her for the money back and she said she needs to get her hair done. I knew then our ‘friendship’ was over. I got my money back but after that never spoke to her again.

[@ryanmedows6072]

If someone has multiple cars, don't give them anything. If they need the money that bad, they'll sell one of their cars.

[@maximusdecimusmeridius5438]

He learn a 8k lesson 😂

[@GainzByMellow]

😂

[@Massivemonster1234]

Learned, not learn.

[@Tehui1974]

@@Massivemonster1234 Wow.

[@GAFB1122]

Dave is right about not loaning money, BUT it is interesting because in my past, I've had a family member loan me some money and guess what, I paid it back as soon as I was able without being asked. See, that's how I am. It's called character!! But I'm also the person that if someone does me a solid, it's a guarantee that I will show my gratitude and make sure if or when they need a solid, I'm there for them!! I've helped many people move on a Saturday morning when most run and scatter and say sorry I can't, I'll be away that weekend. You know what they say. If you want to know who your real friends are, ask someone to help you move on a Saturday, lol.

[@kidneycarecoaching3766]

You are the exception to the rule…

[@coopernecole7962]

​@@kidneycarecoaching3766same but I've never been loaned over 625 (to save my car during 2020)

[@catherinefrancis5827]

Don’t loan money nor co sign for anyone!! Same difference😊

[@Jolson17929]

He’s setting his marriage up for failure already

[@tubenachos]

Time is ticking 💯

[@djpuplex]

I'd say he didn't setup anything he got suckered.

[@fire12731]

So is his wife

[@deirdrekiely6187]

​@@djpuplexIf he had a backbone he could have said NO. There was no gun to his head. Man up!!!

[@barbararepko4824]

I see divorce in his future once he smartens up.

[@Peterjohan2308]

Unfortunately, my entire family has also learned this lesson from my oldest sister. She will cry and complain about how she has no money and so much debt and beg you to lend her some arbitrary amount. You might see a small percentage of it back, but you’ll never get it all. I should also mention that she makes more money than anyone else in my family. She just chooses to live an unsustainably lavish lifestyle at everyone else’s expense. The first time she borrowed money from me was when I was 15, she was 32.

[@mnoble247]

My family knows two things about my finances: I make better than decent money and no you can't have any of it. What really pisses them off isn't my stingyness it's my offer to train them on what I do so they can experience my successes and they WON"T do it. I'm willing to make them a loan of my time but that's not good enough.

[@JMGENTERPRISES]

Anytime friends or family ask to borrow money, i tell them get a cash advance or personal loan at a bank. They usually reply that they do not have any available credit to borrow or dont have good enoigh credit to borrow. That right there is your answer. Stay clear of loans. You are not a bank. Theres a reason these banks do not loan to them. To high a risk.

[@111msw]

Paid the 'Stupid Tax'.... you're right there 👍

[@mamajojovegan]

I love my daddy Dave Ramsey. In Texas they it Big hat no cattle. Never judge a human being by material things only and think they get it together. Here this man has two cars, driving a Corvette and cannot pay his bills, asking people to credit him. He is not paying. If you tell him sell the car, live your income, he will say you are jealous of him. Following Dave Ramsey has helped me in all aspects of my life. I am still driving my 2015 car. It takes me to work, church, the gym and the grocery store. Now that I have finally agreed to work from home full time, they are coming to set up my office , I will walk and will ride my bike everywhere and only use my car to go to church.

[@mike-yo8qj]

Agree with ya -- it's amazing how much others will spend with money they don't have to impress other people. I know people that are worth in the $10+ million range that drive beaters.

[@pamsmith1665]

My car is a 2002

[@felipeoliveira2219]

I learned that lesson at age 20..since then never ever loaned anymore.

[@scott4825]

I'm totally there.... if you feel the need to help someone, give them money or assistance, but loans to family/friends aren't worth the headache.

[@joanneburke9901]

Never loan money to friends or family if you expect to get it back.

[@hirambond1432]

First and most important. Loan is a noun lend is a verb. You lend people money. You do not loan people money. This video is absolutely correct. It ruins relationships it ruins friendships. You should not worry about losing those relationships. Because those people do not care about you or they would not ask you to borrow money to begin with. I have been there, and I have almost never received my money back.

[@KathleenMcNe]

An acquaintance asked to borrow money from me four times in the last couple of years. I declined his request each time. He is unemployed and blowing through his inheritance. A bit earlier he traveled to Europe annually for several years (and was unemployed then too) while I was working full-time-plus (even though I could easily afford to retire).

[@jpjohns2466]

I love ALL my family and most of my friends....Any time someone has come to me asking for money, they promise how they will repay me. Each time I'm able to accommodate, I knew I'm giving that money away. That perspective switch has helped me tremendously.

[@rashadthewealthcoach]

NEVER LOAN ANYONE MONEY, REGARDLESS WHO IT IS!!! YOU WILL NEVER GET IT BACK!!!!

[@Shortballa11]

This a little overboard. A lot of ppl pay back money. Its more like never loan an amount you can't afford to get back.

[@reese85]

@Shortballa11 most ppl in these comments are overboard

[@johnyang1420]

What is wrong with people?

[@williambutler3103]

I always think about this: one person borrowed $1000 from me and only paid back $200. Years later she sold her house and made a ton of money but made no effort to repay me. But the story that bugs me the most is a coworker who never had any money on him when we went to McDonald's and so i paid. He would order lots of food and finally, after paying 3 times, I started bringing my lunch to work.

[@nas6315]

And NEVER co-sign on a loan!

[@Dana-p1o6o]

I have never asked a family member or friend for a loan, but if I had to because of crazy catastrophic circumstances I would do whatever it took to pay that person back with interest. I cannot fathom how someone can take someone else's hard earned money and think it is ok to not pay them back every penny.

[@ericervin4778]

I'm 46 years old. I was probably around 13 when my dad told me "never LOAN someone an amount that you can't afford to lose. If they pay it back, fine. If they don't pay it back, then it's STILL fine because again, you didn't loan them an amount that you couldn't afford to lose."

[@geraldalves9107]

I've quickly learned that it is best to give and don't expect anything back. You'll be much more at peace and this is how the Lord would want us to give as well. Help people with no strings attached 🙏

[@nicholasselke5214]

Make sure you’re actually helping. If you do what you think is helping for someone who won’t help themselves, then you’re enabling. Don’t be an enabler

[@JDAfrica]

I’m not a bank, and I’m not a collection agency…. If you need money, YOU get a loan from a bank. Had too many times when I lent money to family and becomes weird at family gatherings becuase the skipped a payment and bought concert tickets instead.

[@kawicheater]

reminds me of a quote 'givers have to have limits, because takers have none'

[@GAFB1122]

As I wrote below, it's not just money. It's about doing someone a solid. I'll do you a solid once. But if you don't show gratitude, if you don't do me a solid in return (if/when I need it) or you don't follow thru with what you said as in paying me back THEN I will write it off BUT I will NOT lift a finger to help you again!

[@ishaanebrahim3070]

100% true. The best advice from Dave Ramsey. People, you all listen to this man. Been there, never again.

[@twiggy0405ify]

I tell my friends/family members I have money I just don’t lend it out, it’s best you get mad at me it will affect me 0%.

[@KirstenBayes]

I'd never lend money. I gifted my best friend some cash ten years ago, when an absolutely horrible situation happened, and it remains up there among the best things I ever did.

[@bradcruise6291]

This is why you never tell your friends or family how much money you make or how much money you have because they will compare it to how much they have and think that they deserve some of that money because you have enough to give them compared to what they have

[@jonhay75]

Correct.

[@Judy-c3d]

I finally told my daughter that I can’t help her out financially anymore. I had to tell her repeatedly and she finally stopped calling me asking me for money. It’s taken me years to do it but I have so much more money now.

[@sprint7412]

If you're going to loan out money then make sure everything is in writing and the person has property that can be used for collateral. Maybe even keep said property in your possession until the loan is paid in full.

[@melissab3217]

We tried to help a guy out once - instead of loaning him money, we gave it to him in exchange for some work on our house. A year later, he was still making the same poor choices and asked us to loan him money. We said we can't do that, and he blocked us on everything. It put a bad taste in my mouth, like he was only using us for money.

[@James_Hough]

Giving money to a person in real need is great. If you are loaning money expecting that they are able to pay it back, a real need is not there.

[@kkadam96]

Yup. It feels like extra money in your pocket. lol

[@smartguy360]

Never loan family money, they will in most cases never pay you back

[@TMHF]

My wife and I have the following rule: 1. We will consider your request and happily gift you money if we are able. 2. You are under no obligation to pay us back. We don't expect it, and we won't hound you for it. 3. However, if you do not pay us back, we will not gift you money again. This framework removes all of the drama involved and has been very successful in it's application.

[@thetaekwondoe3887]

Do you tell them you're "gifting" them money though? If I borrowed money and was told it was "gifted" I'd be under the impression you don't expect to pay me back. If you said it was a loan, I'd understand there was an expectation to pay it back. ...Not that I'm borrowing from family or non-existant friends, but, just saying, wording can be of importance.

[@TMHF]

@@thetaekwondoe3887 We clearly state the exact rules, in the exact same way, that I just stated in the comment that you're responding to.

[@thetaekwondoe3887]

@@TMHF It's just....if someone doesn't pay back a GIFT, it doesn't make them freeloaders or horrible. It's just kind of a weird thing. Your version of "gift" seems to have strings attached.

[@TMHF]

@@thetaekwondoe3887 I never said that they were freeloaders or horrible people. How are there strings attached? What about this are you not understanding?

[@SDADanCars]

So true 🫡👌

[@sunnyside287]

When people ask me for money I tell them to go to the bank. Never ask people to loan me money either.

[@bmoshareholderappleshareho855]

Like Shakespeare said, "Never be a lender, nor a borrower."

[@chrisbenjamin5564]

I have burrowed money a few times in my life and I have repaid them back. I have even paid it forward to people who have done good deeds for me. I don't lend money out or give money out. I gave in the past and learned my lesson. Everyone doesn't have the same value system.

[@jimmymcgill6778]

He didn't ask for 5k, but he gave it to him? That is called a gift. The other person had problems paying the mother in law. But he still loaned them money. This is not a reason for people to loan anyone money. You just don't loan out money to people that already have problems paying someone back already. And if you give someone money, without them asking. That is a gift. So they do not owe that 5k.

[@CJ-xg6pf]

I made the same mistake...forgive yourself and forget about the money

[@stephengamber6233]

Never loan more than you would give. So when they don't pay it back, it was always a gift anyway.

[@blackice6184]

I love how DR keeps it real with the callers. He doesn't sugarcoat anything and I believe his approach gives the caller the reality and consequences of their financial transactions! "The Bank Of Bradley" Lmao😂

[@Mikey-HTTR]

Don’t loan people money or borrow money from people. Give them money but never loan.

[@ralfschuurmans7115]

A friend of mine was in a problem. He came to me with a detailed plan, how to fix it, how he would pay me back. So i lended him onetime the money and it worked out perfectly. He learn his lesson and our friendship did change. It became better. As friends you have eachother back.

[@williamharvey124]

My wife and I have had at least 10 of these conversations. I always have to remind her that I don't loan money, if I give someone money, I do not expect it back. She has had 5 or 6 strained relationships because her friends asked for money, we agreed to give it to them, and we don't get it back. I, seriously, am good with it, we are helping them, but she stresses over it, and continually asks for the money back. I love her for that, but I seriously do not care, I have always seen it as a gift. At the end of the day, it may have helped me retire a year sooner, but I feel like the good I have done for others far outweighs my chance to retire at 60.

[@d3clips391]

I have said this to people before, the response is to remember to have a positive perspective. (I am not against giving to people, just said to not expect much back from younger folk)

[@jasonmoquin]

I never borrow it and I never loan it. It's a good balance. Equal footing both ways.

[@ezmealstravels9221]

No good deed goes unpunished

[@tylerhair9067]

Never loan money to friends or family. If you are in the position and want to, you can bless them with the money but never expect the money back.

[@thisoldbelair]

Recently one of my best bud’s had a car breakdown that he didn’t have budget room to fix. I knew he would put it on his credit card that he was working super hard to pay off. So i offered to pay for the repair. We ended up fixing it ourselves for very cheap, but still, that interaction of me being willing to gift him the repair actually strengthened our friendship and was a sweet experience. Would have been very different feeling had I offered to loan him money.

[@TheHoriginal]

I love this ❤️