Your Mom's House Podcast - Ep. 632

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The jeans are getting pulled completely over your head this week with Tom Segura and Christina P! Now that J Nadav is C Patty, the main mommies try to teach him about Christmas and what it's all about. We open with a clip from a certified marine screaming into the abyss and really annoying his roommate. Tom and Christina share stories of all the crazy ways their kids are trying to ruin their house, share Joe Rogan's reaction to poutine, and get a neat new update on Norm Summerton! Christina reviews the dumbest holiday movie of all time "The Holiday" starring Cameron Diaz, Kate Winslet, Jack Black, and Jude Law. That gets the mommies to debate who would be a better lover between Jude and Cameron. We look into Jude Law's personal life and how he can afford all 6 of his kids and girlfriends/mistresses. Christina goes over how divorces ruin wealth which makes them go over all their possible divorce strategies, and the booth boys revel Christina and Bert Kreischer are pretty much the same person, which makes Tom the fun beacon. We watch a super cool post-race NASCAR interview with Kyle Busch, come up with possibly the best name for Christina's new Netflix special, and Tom shares a recording of Christina and Bitsy snoring together. ChrisJeansa shares an article of a man who killed his wife with cobras, which got the main mommies into clever ways to get rid of your spouse in different regions! How would they make the YMH staff disappear? And then, we wrap up with a wholesome batch of Christina's curated TikToks.
tomsegura.com/...
christinaponli...
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/ yourmomshousepodcast

[@dizzynixx3033]

I absolutely love when Tim impersonates his son, its the BEST

[@danielsweat7382]

“Hey Tom”

[@heads_together_crypto2422]

This means great episode!

[@Br_ittany1119]

It is hilarious. I wish they'd do a day in the life.

[@ryancassarini4557]

Always liked how he does his son's voice lower than his

[@BikerDaddy22RideorDie]

Its "tom" fake fan lmao

[@nhrideordie]

Christina “I’m nothing like Bert.” 2 minutes later Christina and sunglasses “It’s so cool. Like night time when it’s not. It’s night time in your own face.” Tom “Uh…yeah”

[@Randomoccurences1]

You can for sure hear that comming out of Brets mouth....

[@Stonesmetalworkchannel]

We absolutely NEED a supercut of Tom talking about his kids

[@imjustapancake3188]

This comment better get boosted bc I seriously want this so bad

[@dakotahneal8110]

This plus a 60 minute set written just for the moms channel just with stories about the kids we haven't heard

[@Stonesmetalworkchannel]

@@dakotahneal8110 absolutely

[@liberated4505]

its going to be in his next special

[@DanDannyDanielleBob]

"Fully Tok'd" is the correct title of the special. The sooner you admit it, the sooner we can move on.

[@Sluttybags]

I’d like to see a “Nadivity” Scene, with Nadiv as the baby J

[@LimorG]

Oy my God yes כן אלוהים כן

[@weirdgirl94]

jesus was a j

[@JoE-kx7dw]

Make it a t-shirt 😆

[@LimorG]

@@weirdgirl94 it's pronounced Jeansus

[@ks.nicole]

LMAO

[@John-fj9eo]

Shout out to everyone out there having a good Wednesday. Remember it’s Thursday tomorrow and then it’s basically the weekend. I’m getting a lot of chores done this weekend. I got errands to run. Hope you all had a happy thanksgiving. Christmas is coming up so go get your tree if you haven’t already, and get those lights up outside.

[@TendoTheDude]

Don't forget to get you a hot breakfast and hit the ground running.

[@nickmeyer238]

I hope you all have a good December. It's going to be a magical holiday season. Whether you're Jewish or Christian. It's going to be good. Congestions to Paddy for his first Christmas this year. Set up those nativity scenes. I hope to see a bunch of them outside. And after the holidays it's the new year. So happy early new year. I hope you have some resolutions and that they're good.

[@oni3161]

Now that’s a cool guy

[@Libblelabble]

And most important of all… watch for whaaspuhs

[@Strider258]

What about that crown molding

[@McCarthyJohn100]

If Tom made an animated show of his whole family where he voiced most the characters (kids, sisters, top dog, bitsy, Charo, etc.) It would for sure be an instant classic.

[@thomasthebankengine818]

I just love these two, and thank them so much for all the hours of entertainment and much needed distraction they have offered me over the years. Long live YMH ❤️🙏

[@knock9091]

Long live the King and Queen of HighTight🎉

[@joshuadodd4126]

Can we please get a wife swap for a week Bert and Tom? I think this would be hilarious!!

[@kekmountain2882]

Oh shit that would be amazing

[@kylegordy113]

Shit would be brilliant lmao i really hope they do this

[@sshuggi]

Bets on what day Mommy Tina kills Brent?

[@HarryManback0]

That would be a great deal for Leeann and a total shit deal for Christine.

[@MrDubshooter]

That would be top tier content

[@ricog2343]

Christina: “I do wish he listened to you more on your podcast” 😂😂😂😂😂

[@manuelsosaavalos7414]

We all do lol

[@eddieclark6629]

Lol Tom has perfect impersonations of his parents and his kids

[@ennabasur]

Christina- I don't even know how I'd kill you.. Basketball court to Tom- Hold my beer.

[@marlasinger1808]

I think He said “I’ve got your SIX” as in “I’ve got your back” 🤣🤣

[@joeyd3447]

I was thinking the same thing 😂

[@shawnbradford2243]

Sure he could find a guy to get his back 😂 just has to bend over

[@etchmo52]

I was gonna post the same thing. Glad I scrolled down a bit.

[@dannyvzsz7682]

They are so r worded. Poor guy got mislabeled as a cool guy

[@ArousedRatJones]

Sometimes Tim and Kristen are just as tokked as the best of em

[@rickchronister258]

Did anyone notice the amount of milk in Tom’s coffee today. Definitely more than a splash. RIP Starbucks barista !

[@Smokeyxz]

Yeah… that barista is long gone…..

[@jaytalbot8186]

Wow that ratio was way worse than what I was expecting lmfao

[@jessie7288]

Splash of soy!

[@slimthickens3981]

that shit is whiter and more christian than Patti

[@jessickalush3305]

Good eye, jeans

[@jimsilvis197]

"Stick this fork in the outlet" "Thats how we turn the lights on" I'm going to hell, and you're all coming with me.

[@ryansousa6193]

You’re wrong about Rittenhouse Tom. Do more research please

[@codyhelsel9725]

It’s a joke. Shut up.

[@michelleportelance8009]

I love when they talk about the boys, when Tim does the voice of what the little one is saying. OMG!!! It makes me laugh, so much.

[@dubsbridge]

It’s so fucking good

[@LimorG]

"I'm sorry I'll do better" I died 😂

[@StanleyKubick1]

shoutout to the YMH fan who took Norm out for a beer and made him feel normal and wanted.

[@leahjassmann9396]

That was me, he's awesome!

[@HolographicSweater]

I thought of something pretty alarming whenever Enny said that it’s impossible to murder him because of his paranoia, which is that the reason Dr Drew is trying to get Enny into therapy could be to make him easier to murder. Why Dr Drew wants to murder Enny, I have no idea, but there you have it 🤷‍♀️

[@athinasophiasoaping5540]

Christina makes me laugh so hard…”there is no girlfriend!” Lol

[@brittanylight2629]

Just dropped my dad off for heart surgery. This is gonna help me get through the wait. ❤

[@kaylacleland2590]

sending love and positive thoughts!!! ♥️

[@kekmountain2882]

🙏

[@givelyeve]

sending love!! 💛

[@SportsMatt13]

Can’t wait to set up my Nadivity scene this Christmas so Jesus can touch it though the fence

[@dsauce8780]

You just accelerated my fajitas.

[@marcusshaner7066]

Holy shit. Solid gold. I'm so ashamed by how hard I laughed at this.

[@jessyelane11111]

Hahahahahahaahahagag

[@SunnyDementia]

"I want you to be alone and sad." As a divorced man, this really hit home.

[@mysticapprentice]

I feel you buddy, so the best thing you can do is find every way to be happy, even if it's just hanging out with friends and having BBQ and beer. Ay Ay Ay!

[@mcooper7743]

More celebs that didn’t watch the Rittenhouse trial.

[@alexjames3797]

These fucking ellis stories are so good lol its the only shit I can show my family and they laugh as hard as I do.

[@chilibeer3912]

They don’t also enjoy pootine or dildo reviews?

[@righthandeddashboard]

@@chilibeer3912 i’m bewildered by that information

[@mikewizz29]

The genuine fear Patty felt for his life when Tom responds to him saying "Wait you're saying I don't have fun?" put a big smile on my face

[@alaguilar7446]

Patty fucking ruined it all on Dr.Drew saying it's all a bit I was really hoping for Tim to snap on him

[@davidpowers746]

*Paddy

[@mrybird4044]

Someone has to say it: *I’m really digging Christjeana’s look today*

[@featherin.it.2580]

Christy is so serious talking about Tom moving on

[@therealBeerCanDan]

GOOD MORNING JULIA Today is a nice day, it's Wednesday. Halfway through the week, so have a good day at work. It's cold here so cover up. Shout out Jennifer, it's her birthday. Have a nice day 😊👍

[@jenniferdennis6465]

Happy birthday Jennifer!

[@zachc7111]

Watch for waspes and remember to drink water

[@timaciousdfiftythree]

You should come down later for moose soup

[@nickmeyer238]

SUU WUUU!

[@JoE-kx7dw]

🎶🎶🎶🎸Cool Guy Club😎

[@Br_ittany1119]

I love murder talk with Tim & Tina. Makes my heart melt.

[@skankhunt6066]

Let’s go full throttle! I hope this comment doesn’t scare you!

[@John-lo4xz]

Touch my knife through the fence

[@christianbrix4311]

Love Christine's vest here, and her wardrobe in general

[@martinfabry9494]

What brand is that

[@callahan9119]

Christina gets all exhausted from a nanny raising her kids.

[@IDUZINTERNETS]

Love the new producer Patty. The last one was a little too J-ish

[@faperito2389]

Team Jesus!!!

[@Courier_Seven]

A little?

[@frecklefart909]

*Paddy... Please stop with Patty, it's Muricanised Irish and it hurts my soul

[@señor916xfour]

Nadiv must’ve gotten a raise because he’s laughing harder and louder even more than usual this episode!

[@gnarf250]

He’s just trying to get his laugh heard. So annoying

[@robertfrost8264]

It was funny in the old studio because it was through the wall.. he's incessant, non-stop and it's *way too loud* now.

[@KenzoQasim223]

i hate the chucklefuckers in the back it's the worst

[@paulfarmer9443]

It’s baby Jesus in his life

[@lawrenceleong8747]

Stop dead naming him Chomo. It's Paddy O' Callahan. Native is dead and buried.

[@frecklefart909]

I actually giggled out loud when Mr. O'Callaghan changed hats, it was a nice touch 👌🏻😂

[@miguelsomarriba1103]

Shoutout to everyone going around doing their thing, is beautiful wednesday is getting colder so better keep warm. Shoutout to all people having their birthdays this week. Don’t forget to keep doing your stuff.

[@rossworth]

1:31:30 - He's saying I got your SIX, as in I got your back. The man is clearly a certified Marine for goodness sake!!

[@larryeller9489]

That’s what I was thinking 🤔

[@Revolution1117]

Yeah, I'm surprised Tim didn't catch that, given that Top Dog was in Nam.

[@Svoorhout85]

He's a certified Marine Marine. That means he's worth 2 marines.

[@Kynect2Hymn]

Yeah I can't believe no one there didn't realize that lol

[@jonnyhollywood514]

Patrick laughs soo hard during the cast i sometimes think he's lost his mind lolol

[@bendejo8]

It's just because Allah and Jesus are fighting each other over his hat.

[@FWbaracuss]

He's a good J

[@brandonwallace5758]

I'm probably stating the obvious but the ambient laughter from the peanut gallery(mostly Patty) tips this already GOLD podcast over the top. Every. Episode.

[@Judgement_Kazzy]

Get Christine and Brad Williams in a cage match for the next YMH Live

[@erandyg1311]

Tom’s coffee looking extra milky today. RIP that barista.

[@peterjonston5905]

*glugluglugluglglg

[@YoMama9021]

Someone weirdly obsessed lol

[@thecapricorn11]

💦💦🍆

[@Menkii]

The sunglasses made this podcast 1000% cooler, almost as cool as fed smoker😎😎

[@nealstanesick6234]

Any idea what kind of Ray Ban's Tom is wearing?

[@karlakrobertson8504]

Feather it

[@michaeltonikov]

that is how is done at Falcon Car Wash my dear brother!

[@thedapperfoxtrot]

As someone with a learning disability, I'm cry laughing at the notion of duping someone to their dumb death. 😂

[@dimebagshane]

I haven't laughed that hard at a fart video in so long. Holy shit I'm in tears. The dudes face his eyes its priceless. And I swear I replayed it multiple times and I swear it sounded different everytime. 👏👏👏

[@gonzolanshe9192]

Dude me too. Crying 😂 Would love to have the source video

[@dimebagshane]

@@gonzolanshe9192 same! I need it

[@Simon-hp4py]

When Patty took the cross out I died hahaha

[@angelamerkin]

The best part of being born on Dec 1st is knowing it’s Tom’s least favorite day of the year #AirSegura

[@unicorn_bread]

Happy bday, birthday twin!! 🎂

[@angelamerkin]

@@unicorn_bread same to you!! Best day of the yearrrrr

[@ryanweaver6717]

Ayyy gang gang

[@diosabbathdisciple6618]

Tom: Wait Nadav, you don't think I'm fun? Native: *sweat beads forming* "You're fun too." Nadav missing poster goes online within 2 hrs

[@Misfit.Profit]

Thank you Christina for knowing the difference between venom and poison. You’re still the smartest person in my room🤗

[@TheIsaeldelgadojaime]

The Revelation of Christina being Bert is hilarious 😂

[@YoMama9021]

I don’t see it. Bert is a mess of a person. Money doesn’t fix you.

[@ZombieGameAreMe]

Imagine if the new studio is literally just a recreation of Charles' office

[@jjjsofficial7478]

I'lllllll SAYYYYYYY 😂

[@leathercoatguy]

Or Studio G.

[@shooglechic]

I like that...

[@josephdavis2695]

Got this nice view. Where are we…. Oop…. Yeah… THERE WE ARE ha ha ha ha. Got my coffee.

[@bradenlatimer385]

Is it just me with the minimal setup for the studio and the zero guests has given this show a resurgence of how funny this show can be

[@jacksonlusted908]

Friendly reminder that Kyle Rittenhouse is a hero

[@thecapricorn11]

❌

[@sparky4947]

Push keeps getting more handsome and Tom keeps getting more beautiful.

[@koalateagames2494]

ChrisJeansa laughing at the opening clip revealed my love for this show is about our growing ability to digest all this fucked up shit into humor.

[@Samantha-og6yc]

ChisJeansa is my absolute favorite name thus far 🤣🤣🤣

[@RedZedHeadTV]

A CERTIFIED MARINE..... MARINE

[@darkdogdigital6364]

Holy Shit! The bit on the lake murder is gold! As a person who works on Lake Travis and has dealt with it, GOLD!

[@StudioMod]

44:33 when Nadav picked up the crucifix casually and kept talking I literally laughed for like 8 minutes lol

[@Seewalks]

Tina is literally Patrice's "Ain't that better" bit!

[@troygomez5254]

Why the TV so loud you should watch the game on mute ain't that better lol

[@raspberry-jam]

Tom doesn't look like he eats dry turkey sandwiches ..

[@WitzyZed]

You can sit in the vent!

[@420thewhite]

When she said " I dont want you to be happy with someone else after me" I felt that

[@josef2012]

Fun date 😬

[@420thewhite]

@@josef2012 😂🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂

[@Deadman1000]

Like a sociopathic, lunatic with no self esteem?

[@greatsinceadolescents1742]

The relief in his face is top shelf

[@juancarlosceja7414]

As a recent widowed I really enjoyed your guys talk. To bad you already gave yourself up by talking about it. Rule #1

[@kevinleach3830]

I watched 100+ episodes before i realized Nadav was the crazy laughter in the background. Now its my favorite.

[@yannikakapralli]

ITS THE BEST

[@drivehard2395]

Live show: Worth the price of admission just to see Joe's reactions. GOLD! Chris's stuff... GOLD!

[@GETmessedUPP]

Is there any way to watch it live at home if you cant make the tour?

[@sarahlowell3763]

Joe was so boring but his reactions to the heavy segment were funny. Unc Shine and Chris saved the show.

[@thelifeaquatica]

Christina doesn't talk about herself enough to be Bert

[@simenolsen7889]

I love hearing Tom talk about his kid! Sounds like a r-worded grown ass dwarf.

[@kraigj7]

I like sunglasses in stores mainly when I'm high and don't want to make eye contact without the barrier

[@StanleyKubick1]

the true sign of a weak man

[@monkeywang9972]

“Your die hards come with you” -Christine You bet we do, every heavy segment!

[@variaxi935]

Hope I die hard

[@georgeo8397]

That quote can mean 2 things

[@milesbrown9236]

Tim, not lying your progress is stunning with your weight loss. You and christy have inspired me physically and emotionally. Keep it going man, will love what you do to the end of time.

[@chucklefizz]

I am eternally grateful for this podcast for the amount of joy it brings me. Seriously brings me out of my negative thought patterns. Much love ❤️

[@clevermissfox]

Loved seeing timmy on the bad friends live!!

[@torodeoro7423]

He saved that episode from being a total mess

[@niteshade8546]

@@torodeoro7423 Tom didn't want to be there and it showed. He was a poor sport on there until the ymh questions.

[@AnonymousFREEZEpOp1]

@@niteshade8546 Well Andrew Santino has a real problem with comedians who are funnier than himself and is so insufferable to be around im not surprised. Tom probably only did it for Bobby.

[@osloconfidental1807]

@@AnonymousFREEZEpOp1 where is this info from? 😂 Santino is hilarious, and he loves Tom

[@STSGuitar16]

@@AnonymousFREEZEpOp1 as much as i love Tim, santino is a million times funnier than he is lol

[@Grandpama2]

Timothy and Christiana need to write an animated show about their kids where Timothy does the voices.

[@CJ_Bell]

I hope their new studio never gets built. The mommies have always been at their funniest cooped up face to face with a tv between them IMHO.

[@smeffbensen8045]

WE NEED A SHIRT that says its nighttime in your own face

[@theknownunknown9883]

1) cynthias mommy milkers are definitely following proto 2) shout out to Denton, TX!! where are all my Denton mommys?! 🤣🧑‍🦼

[@shawnbradford2243]

Down there some to visit family, Okc jeans here!

[@bryanriggs9639]

I lived in Denton for a year a few years back...

[@lassorbrandon]

I cant wait to see the J's Nadavity Scene

[@yoyo-vz2yt]

Wasn't expecting Rowdy Fxkn Busch on here. Good shxt mommies!

[@vanyllinha]

I don’t know why I rewatched it after a year, but I don’t regret it

[@andrewnolan7029]

Waiting for Tina to show up in a KB M&Ms jacket next week. KB's interview is just the tip of the iceberg!

[@GriseldaxDOOM]

Man this has to be one of the darkest YMH episodes lmao

[@thedukeofkidding941]

Nadavs contributions are getting better and better and I'm here for it

[@j.gallegos948]

Native thinking the Christmas tree goes outside was fu#$ing hilarious.

[@tylerhamm2628]

I was in Ireland a couple years ago… Garth is a God over there, those chomos go nuts for him.

[@RiseReligion]

Rittenhouse looked exactly the same when he broke down when getting the verdict as he looked on the stand. So either he's a great actor or maybe, just maybe it wasn't fake.

[@MegaFlorest]

Hmmm, not exactly, but also...shut up nerd. It was a joke. He looked funny.

[@Ryan23251]

"Can I have you be miserable as part of my exit agreement?" Couple Goals ❤️

[@FWbaracuss]

This is the funniest episode in awhile

[@Brochacho-nl5bk]

We all know when Tom said he can’t think of any guy he would be mad that she could be with. We know of one 🐀👑

[@GrilledCheeseDanny]

Gang gang

[@lostinsauce4515]

a ferret's just like a stretched out rat

[@nerdherd6771]

Keep featherin it brother. I think the new "cool guy" actually said I got your six like I got your back.

[@jageforthewin]

I died laughing at Tom and Christina’s bit of his mother’s paranoia. 1:14:02

[@alexandriacredeur5184]

I was dying too

[@dawierdo12345]

Who else wants them to bring their kids on the podcast for a few minutes? That would be interesting

[@the_OG_OG]

Happy Wednesday, Mommies! I'd like some privacy.

[@coreys.4778]

Some constructive feedback to YMH. on live episodes, either have the guest on from the beginning for the video clips. So we as viewers aren't watching the same clips. It takes the full enjoyment out of it. Or have different clips to show the guests. Besides that you guys are killing it, keep it up.

[@rJRomeroj]

Did anyone else notice how Nadavs googling speed increased x1000 fold whilst' looking up the assisted killing?

[@thelifeaquatica]

Christina's new special: The Contraption

[@robertmcdonald3779]

The 1st Clip, lol I'm in Denton and I didn't know about all that thank you old dude! Keep em high and tight!

[@seansantana4024]

It’s about time men’s wearhouse put an ad on this you’re gonna love the way you look

[@BadGoyz4Life]

More like Cool Guy's Warehouse

[@daneillekucinski2194]

That’s the best Christina quote I have ever heard”by the end of the day I just want my vagina to seal itself shut” 🤣

[@SiZzLePoPPiN]

I love how the entire time they are talking about the smokeshows jude law has banged, PIG is just frozen on the screen smiling in the background on the montior......PIG THE REAL SMOKESHOW.... LMAO

[@beercavetech]

They both agree to play the first clip and then Christina goes “I seen the dumbest Christmas movie ever yesterday”

[@Bruce1Parsons]

Proof Crystal is the same as Burp Christening

[@briccs3830]

She’s the worst

[@oBuLLzEyEo1013]

@@Bruce1Parsons Oh come on that's not even close now, lol...

[@younggordan8748]

That was very Brent of her

[@sarahmaynard5883]

I love the energy shift when they put sunglasses on… I don’t know everything just cracked my shit up so much more after that am I tocked

[@TheDeal187]

Yeh

[@reed4109]

These guys need guests again, this show needs a bit of pep

[@thetragicschoolbuspodcast]

Hey guys I'm Matt's roommate (from the opening clip. Certified Marine-Marine) That wasn't cigarette smoke btw. We burn incense while taking dumps because its a shared bath. Jack and Jill bathroom. We don't smoke in the house.