Just when you think it (she) can't get better! It gets BETTER!!!!!!

9 days no contact. Grieving the person I thought he was, grieving the future I thought I had- its a lot… wish there was a fast forward button!

I just found out the man I've spent the last 16 yeara with has done nothing but lie and cheat on me. After being caught with the other %#$?!, he stayed gone for a few days. Then he came home like nothing had happened. After a few days of sleeping in separate rooms he brought up sex. I told him to get it from her, cuz we were done in that area.

Non judgmental observation.

Hi there Dr. RAMINI. Its me again, Elissa because I had a light bulb moment. ,Why dont you show examples of different forms of narcissism in people ,lets say in history instead of living today so no one should be in jeopardy. Sincerely yours, thank you very much Elissa.

I am.

My mom is a Narc, I watchd her take care of my grandma whilst she was on her death bed, like keep up in the night, checking on her, sleeping on hospital floors, and the entire time complaining to me and no one else that she's doing all this coz she's looked at as the broke one in the family, and how she too needed to go to work. This is the same woman who physically and emotionally abused me my whole life.... It's amazing how exhausting their life actually is, the facades and all...

No contact for a healthy person is self-preservation. Narcissists view everyone as disposable objects they can use and discard whenever they feel like it. Some are delusional enough to believe that going no-contact is a great strategy to get people to chase after and desire them more.

gaslighting by accusing me of gaslighting when i tell the truth

Ramani, I have always been an authentic person. They don't have to be over 50.

Their way or the highway . Your money is Their money , not our money . Meanness and greedy . Well understood Thanks for clarification Dr.Ramani so true .

Authentic people know what is theirs and what isn't. They see.

Thankfully, all the people in my life who care about me know that I tried way too hard and should have ended it sooner. But one thing they just don't understand is how tricky it is to stay safe trying get them out of your life. He is a narcissist, he's not just going to leave quietly; He's already said if I make things difficult he's going to FML . And I know he will do it. There are also community property laws so I can't just kick him out and change the locks- I wish I could. I have to say, I can cope with listening to people who love me continue to try to protect me and offer well-meaning advice when they just really don't get it. Rather be dealing with that than the absolute Hell of loving a narcissist.

It seems the people who are protective of narcissists’ reactions don’t remember very well the dangerous behavior of the narcissist and that narcissists themselves don’t know when they will put others in harms way. I have seen and know of many grandiose, entitled, vindictive narcissists. You NAILED it again. There is nothing about it trying to protect themselves when you see smoke coming out of their ears as they talk enraged. It is a dangerous place where they are when they get this way. Thanks so much!!!

How can you prove that Dr ramani is not a narcissist?

I can't clean my house anymore.

Now that got me right in the feels, all relatable!

Thank you so much for this!!!!! I relate fully to 99% of what you said. I practically leapt out of my seat when you said that Truth tellers will get out of Dodge as soon as possible: I emigrated on my own at age 19. Need I say more? In my adult years, I have found a peaceful place, in which I can be myself, and verbalize feelings, not from a place of anger. Life is complicated, and the path, long. I feel like things were left in a good place, and communication was meaningful at the end of my mother's life. I felt that we were able to talk honestly, and openly with each other, in ways that she knew the other family members could not give her, at the end. Thank you for all that you give, with such generosity.

One, only one person destroyed my life. It was the Narcissist. How did I get there????😭

One of the shaming statements that get to me is “you’re so selfish”

I’ve gotten the “I lied to you and cheated on you because it wasn’t worth the headache of telling you and that I didn’t see the relationship lasting much longer and the seats for the hockey game were too good to pass up” I feel sad realizing that the hockey game seats were more important to him than me/hurting me. He texted me that night “goodnight babe I love you” with another woman in my spot in the bed next to him. How does someone do that? It’s still so painful for me. I’m not sure how to work through this pain. Im on month 4 post break up.

It's a big turn off for me personally when women mutilate and disfigure their eyebrows

The more I learn about narcissistic behavior’ the worse I feel it s absolutely terrible

I left my narcissist 3 years ago after 20 years…i heart that I love him- it’s still hurts - he moved on right away- I completed 18 months of DBT therapy that changed everything for me…our son graduated- dad the narcissist moved on and seems to be happy- I can’t help but think…. Why was I not enough? Everyday its work.

Are we sure it'll be actually YOU responding and not one of your assistants?

I was so excited when I saw this video!💜💜💜

Your info is helpful. However my situation has changed a bit..At this point, kind of amusing only cuz I catch all the garbage that comes from mom. Currently my brother is her target especially after years of her using him as a flying monkey. However show is on the other foot. Mom is trying to use me that way. I am simply letting it slide. There is physical distance between us most of the time. So I am tempted to allow her "wrath" from a distance by "violating her trust". A simple conversation with my brother to talk about her gossip. However, when done with that I might really tell her to stay the hell away from me and my home. For real. Not sure yet. Have made tons of progress, but mulling a few options. My goal is not revenge. I simply do not want to participate in her game and think confronting her via text is the best way to deal with it. Especially when she reaches 1000 miles away. She is finally too old to keep up her stamina and I finally got my life moving forward. I want her out as much as possible except the occasional hi and send a card thing. Essentially I just do not have anymore hope or seeing anymore future to work on with her crazy. I have a few final hurdles with my own p.t.s.d. to work out and my job is not to ever take care of her, ever. Like she is going to a nursing home cuz I will never be available for any major medical problems. Just that simple. A nursing home. Looking forward to it. The dump em and leave em thing. Trying not to be petty but that is kind of where she deserves to go

Listen I'm here listening to you again. With. My son helped me with phone today, Sometime the past weekI decided when he said something awful to me again I decided and I told him while laying backwards on the bed that "I'm leaving you." He told me I want to take him to the cleaners. I told him I don't want nothing except if he decided he wants a divorce he has to pay for it. I am into I am into astrology my birthday is July 18th 1949. Most important my role model is Nelson Mandela who was born on the same day I was . Thank you for taking the time to listen to me I love you and I hope to speak to you one day soon in the future.Elissa Ryan AKA chicky❤

Oh yes!…….but when you actually do it….. guilt trip, manipulation, control…………true, they never say, “no”………and they play the hero - “I never tell you that you can’t do anything”, as they then demand more time to do what they want……your life gets flattened

Thank u Dr Ramani! You’re awesome and have helped me so much with Narc family dysfunction.. 💗

Too many people, without the proper certification are going around diagnosing people with Narcissistic Personality Disorder! It's getting ridiculous! Please leave the diagnosing to the certified Psychiatric professionals!

My sister used to say "you're only nice to me because you want to manipulate me!", "You want me to be the villain, yet again!!!" And she would yell at me, and be so upset, and leave me feeling just so confused.

Dr. Ramini I just wanted to add that in some cases when the narcissist starts recruiting flying monkeys it's often to hide a small or big crime they have committed. Victims should not get distracted by the dramatics of the game rather look beyond into the underlying criminal act. It's always important to be very cautious.

Thank you for all the effort you make towards healing those affected by narcissism. If only I had recognized what the narcissists were doing years ago…but better late than never ever!

I was this girl for so long. When I began to correct it I had less guys even approaching me to begin with. Now when I date it's also helped me to eliminate guys who will waste my time much faster. Dating now days is just such a nightmare in general, it's not even enjoyable anymore:(

Wow!!! This brings to light so many frustrating "conversations" between my mom and soon to be ex husband. It has literally created a physical response in my solar plexus of anger and disgust with the realization of being gaslit and mistreated by the "no answer response". It seems normal to answer a question in my mind, so I'd get angry and reactive from not getting an answer to even the simplest of questions. Which in turn, made me look like the problem; the hot headed red head. Such a crap stereotype they loved to use in their corner. Thank you for this validating video and topic, even if it hurts to know how manipulative people are.

Is everything a threat to a narcissist Sure does feel like it They’re cowards insecure

Oh. My. God.

I packed my bags over a dozen times, this time I was serious!! I had enough of the abuse. GOD made a way for my Children and I to get away. I had to get the cops involved. It was life or death and I chose life. Be safe please. Sending you all lots of Love ❤!

What's the difference between the healing program and the network? It's not clear. Thanks

I thank God every day for KZbin. All the darkness is coming into the light. Let's all do greater for our future generations. This is a life saver!

Dr Ramani, your videos helped me survive a devastating divorce while dealing with an adult Narc daughter. I can’t thank you enough for sharing your wisdom to help so many of us out here🙏🏽. May God bless you❤️

I had never heard of a narcissist personality. I went as far as to do bariatric surgery because I thought something was wrong with me that I was not enough are good enough. I didn't understand all the rage an he could treat others so well an me so bad.

I would like to join. But I'm no longer fully financially independent, nor wise in all new tech I will need my son's assistance, but it is delayed since he is living in other city But I really wish to join you I bet you could clarify a good few things for me, cause therapy that I went through haven't solved all the mistery what happened to me

My narcissistic superior call me a narcissist. For pete sake. Gaslighting at its finest

17:50 my best friend comes from a wealthy family. She cut them off because they were abusive. She still has the same notion, however, that she shouldn’t have to work because she is special. It’s maddening.

I've been really struggling with this. I recently found out my ex was cheating on me with a coworker, and when we broke up, he carried on with her. I think about our relationship, and I was definitely standing up for what I was ok and not okay with. He wanted to be out drinking and gambling however much he wanted. I think he found a girl who just had lower standards than me.

Wow. This is so true..and very eye opening. My wasband was even meaner once I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Yes he drove me to my appointments, but not without a lot of anger and resentment. And a whole lot of gaslighting and running me down. Finally..I realized…he was never. Ever going to be kind. He actually used my illness to get sympathy. I nearly died of sepsis because he’d convinced me it was all in my head…and I was just seeking attention. When my heart stopped in the surgery …of course they restarted it. But He phoned my parents for some strange reason to tell them about it. My dad told me years later that he’d never heart Garry so happy. He told them I might not survive the night. Which wasn’t at all true. I was stable and in the best hospital. He’s actually been diagnosed as a sociopath.

My narcissistic ex husband was 44 when we met. He’d been living alone since 17 (albeit in a beach house his parents gave him), and had tried to “launch” himself as a bassist in a band, a sound engineer, and then as a graphic artist. He was self-employed, and his know-it-all attitude lost him clients and therefore income over the course of our 7 years together. He blamed not getting his full inheritance from his father, a bad real estate move by his ex wife, his clients, for why he grew financially worse as time went by. As a NYC public school teacher, my income has never been great but has always been nevertheless steady, as is my health insurance and pension I have worked my ass off for in 24 years of a career which will be over in 8 more. We always paid our own way…but by the end, I was paying for HIS bills and my own, being blamed for not moving out of state because I’d lose the very job that paid his bills and got him seen at the doctor for just a copay. In the end, I was about $10,000 poorer but free, and now he’s someone else’s problem.

Amazing that you are doing this 😊 may I ask are people from australia able to join in as well??