10 Reasons Why Narcissists Avoid Kissing their Partners

10 Reasons Why Narcissists Avoid Kissing their Partners.
Kissing is one of the many ways romantic partners connect and is an important component of any relationship. When couples kiss, they establish emotional intimacy since the act entails feelings of connection and vulnerability.
Remember that narcissists have no empathy. Do narcissists kiss? They do, but the narcissist always has an agenda when he enters a relationship. That plan is to turn you into their supply.
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Video Time Line
Introduction 00:00
10 Reasons Why Narcissists Avoid Kissing Their Partners 00:33
Number 1 Narcissists Have Ulterior Motives. 00:38
Number 2 Narcissists Aren't Just Romantic. 01:32
Number 3 Narcissists Lack Empathy 02:34
Number 4 Narcissists Don't Want To Admit Their Feelings. 03:26
Number 5 Narcissists Won't Break Down Their Walls. 04:17
Number 6 Narcissists Think They Are Above Other People. 04:56
Number 7 Narcissists Don't Believe In The Concept Of Relationship Security. 05:42
Number 8 Narcissists See This As Losing Control. 06:51
Number 9 Narcissists Firmly Refuse To Build Emotional Connections 07:42
Number 10 Narcissists Avoid Kissing As This Is A Sign Of Weakness. 08:48
Music
Title: Depth Fuse
Artist: French Fuse
#spotthenarcissist #narcissism #narcissist
DISCLAIMER:
The information in this video is research-based and for educational purposes. Please consult an authorized professional for guidance and help on your specific case.

[@spotthenarcissist]

10 Reasons Why Narcissists Avoid Kissing their Partners. Kissing is one of the many ways romantic partners connect and is an important component of any relationship. When couples kiss, they establish emotional intimacy since the act entails feelings of connection and vulnerability. Remember that narcissists have no empathy. Do narcissists kiss? They do, but the narcissist always has an agenda when he enters a relationship. That plan is to turn you into their supply. 🙏🙏🙏Please support my work and buy me a coffee through this link: bit.ly/3aRsYjI Click Here to Subscribe: kzbin.info/door/Nf93_WzIGLOV1C4PDGjrQg Video Time Line Introduction 00:00 10 Reasons Why Narcissists Avoid Kissing Their Partners 00:33 Number 1 Narcissists Have Ulterior Motives. 00:38 Number 2 Narcissists Aren't Just Romantic. 01:32 Number 3 Narcissists Lack Empathy 02:34 Number 4 Narcissists Don't Want To Admit Their Feelings. 03:26 Number 5 Narcissists Won't Break Down Their Walls. 04:17 Number 6 Narcissists Think They Are Above Other People. 04:56 Number 7 Narcissists Don't Believe In The Concept Of Relationship Security. 05:42 Number 8 Narcissists See This As Losing Control. 06:51 Number 9 Narcissists Firmly Refuse To Build Emotional Connections 07:42 Number 10 Narcissists Avoid Kissing As This Is A Sign Of Weakness. 08:48 #spotthenarcissist #narcissism #narcissist

[@That_Handle]

🤨 00:24 - "....when _'he'_ enters a relationship... "? 🧐 Let's expand your audience instead of picking out a gynocentric philosophy, shall we? Love-bombing sure does occur from "her" as well so let's make sure we afford equal opportunity and equal representation. Limerence propensities occur both ways based on core wounds behind the attachment styles creating the attraction styles and the pursuant beliefs of Love Languages that are nothing more at times than externalized soothing deactivation strategies. 👏👐🙌👐✊️👊✊️✌️🤟🖖 🍻|🥂

[@kathleenquinn6053]

My narcissist ex husband told me he didn't know how to kiss. He would give a little peck like you might give Grandma when leaving the room

[@keithwittman4741]

issue that I have with this video is stating gender. Female narcissists exist, too. I didn't see it coming. Due to all explanations being labeled as a male personality disorder. Over 20 years of being used.

[@ksjanetka]

You can add NO FOREPLAY to that, too!!!!!!!!

[@missminti]

The first couple times they fake enthusiasm about it, by about month 3 - nothing but their own pleasure is prioritized. MY ex even had sex with me when I was so drunk I couldn't remember it. So awful!

[@jamiesauerwein8453]

Lmao my Narc told me all the ladies loved his foreplay I was trying to show him where the clit was

[@davelew86]

Yeah you can

[@jimmieblue6262]

It took a little over a year for my x es true self to be completely revealed. I told her before that sex is a big deal in our relationship and could she handle being loved a lot. About 7-8 months into it things started changing pretty quickly, and at the 1 year mark it was miserable 😢 💔.

[@gypsysoul7425]

True!!!!

[@SG-nu7go]

Doesn’t stop at not kissing, after they get you they avoid all intimacy besides having intercourse for their own needs.

[@mercyrahma9501]

Exactly ! So Thankful to God i am narc Free !!! 😌😇

[@debraannedimezza8075]

Exactly

[@lovepeace2137]

Painfully true

[@user-qc2qx2kw5b]

It’s true when I want sex I get no it’s only when he wants it.

[@carolnichols2869]

One doesn't even want sex. None for about 10 years now. But I am getting old, so I just look at it as I have a room mate.

[@spitfire8539]

Narcissists are like five years old trapped inside an adults body.

[@tansyvee3679]

Yesss

[@carriealonso2808]

That is what a narcissist is a Demon child trap inside and adult body that’s my ex

[@constancewalsh3646]

Very well put. My narcissist has two kids inside, the five-year-old and the raging fourteen year old. The adult has it all together and does he ever!

[@kaoshi_kutie]

Yes!!

[@donaldpaulson3920]

Would strongly disagree

[@JohnJohn-lu7wd]

What is most bizarre is that they actually believe that they are okay.

[@SkyePhoenix]

They believe that they are more than okay. They believe that they are above us common folk.

[@markmiller4503]

We’re crazy

[@vhayashi7369]

I know right!

[@royalbohemian9757]

Yet they KNOW something is wrong

[@lovepeace2137]

They are their own god

[@passinthru4788]

One sided relationship is an excellent way to describe being with a genuine narcissist.

[@gertiketsch6731]

Yess so right

[@gigidayz6936]

💯

[@dsmusicbird]

Beyond one-sided, they break you! And it takes a while to heal bit by bit. It’s worth it never to engage.

[@alwaysrighton]

"Genuine" and "Narcissist" cancel each other perfectly to describe what you have in front of you when in a relationship with them.

[@donaldpaulson3920]

Nope

[@cynthiajohnson9412]

It's not just kissing. They avoid any kind of caress.

[@kimvannote5024]

Intimacy

[@nancydarnell4852]

So true!

[@dennisrobinson8008]

Any kind of CARES... They won't give a fuck.

[@elcee7800]

Hey you’re right!!! Right to the wheelbarrow position.

[@IsraelWillBeFree]

Unless they want something

[@reneejames3325]

I'm so sick of narcissists! 🤮

[@CarlosHernandez-np2il]

As a sigma person we can smell them. To me narcissists and sigma are not the same. Both are parralle. But sigma are more kinder. But not so social. But narcissist are not to triste to much.

[@davidhinkson8856]

We kissed when we were dating and it seemed meaningful enough, but once we got married and she achieved her goal of having a child, there was no more kissing, hugging or any physical intimate contact and to me that was very hurtful.

[@sgtmuffinbadger6147]

Mine did this exactly as well

[@danielmuoto7731]

mine did same aswell, she totally avoids every love, intimate after our child was born, madness 😠

[@aleksandrmelenig482]

Exact same story here. Marriage, child... And forget about it

[@MrExtraFINESSEtrial]

WOW... Thank you so much for sharing the knowledge 🤯💡 no marriage, no children yet and this 3 out of 3 experiences have opened my eyes

[@galaosch9959]

Happened to me too, and I’m taking about a man. Once our 2 children came, out went our “intimacy”. Interesting ( and pathetic).

[@usatodaywife]

A narcissist gives bird peck "kisses" - basically the same kind of quick kiss they'd give their grandmother. You might even get a 1/2 dozen bird peck kisses in a row, but not a REAL kiss.

[@adel2457]

Oh my I often wondered about this. My husband doesn't even pout or move his lips. I just feel like why does he even bother? Just leave me alone already.

[@mercyrahma9501]

😅👍 Bird peck kisses Such an accurate way to describe their "kisses" indeed

[@user-kx6tw3fo1e]

😆

[@sharon_rose724]

Three quick kisses before he left for work, maybe one when he got home.

[@twofry64]

I only got romantic kisses early on during the seduction. Afterwards it was always the bird peck. He never held my hand or showed any type of affection. When I called him out he said he's not like that.

[@sheenaspitts1692]

I am crying reading this. Noone should ever have yo go thru this

[@crazyballpythongenetics4838]

Just finished a new episode 😒 and i am trained for this all my life .. i just watch these videos to tell my self yeah you already know whst why and when even i almost can't take it any more the only thing why i can keep up with the bullshit because i think i am a empath on the highest level i cant come up with that name anyway its hard ..to go trough this coctail narc female i love .. and the sadest thing of the whole story when she said relation or nothing i knew what was gonna happend .. so i did not pas the final exam te universe send to me .. amd i studdied soo many years for it .. 🤷‍♂️ today its her birthday .. and i am thinking of getting her the gift of beeing single again .. but i feel sad to do shit to her like that .. even tho she executes me when she gets the chance 🤦‍♂️note to future self trust your gut next time

[@themysticmuse1111]

Depressing AF. 😬😔

[@diamondgreenchoreoqueen]

I totally agree. It’s very so hurtful.

[@royalbohemian9757]

Extremely hard and sad and hurts like hell.

[@missb1982]

I feel you.

[@valvynagiah357]

I just broke up with a narcissist. This video is 100% true. This was exactly how she behaved

[@renaissance1763]

Same just left mines a month ago

[@williambr88]

@@renaissance1763 *mine

[@FarfallaSiciliana427]

Same - ended our relationship on a trip on Europe - I couldn't take it anymore

[@trillykolla8347]

Same . In a hotel room practicing no contact and struggling every step of the way.

[@rebeccahowie7234]

@@trillykolla8347stay strong!!! I still have to do-parent with mine but I just look at him with pure embarrassment at this point. Like how I allowed that in my life for so long!!

[@cindyspringstead7451]

Yup, bird kisses, no cuddles, no foreplay, no affection. I stayed for 15 yrs of his crap. His put downs. His bullying, his triangulation. I walked out a year and a half ago. I have not contacted or uttered one syllable to that demon that lives in a mans body. His coworkers even described him as a strange combination of childish and evil. Good riddance.

[@keithwittman4741]

Wish you well. Hope you find true love ❤️

[@dr.jenniferma3914]

Childish and evil. That's a perfect description.

[@charlie-girl72]

Very true ❤

[@cathymcdonald9175]

Yes. 16 years of it . Out of it 2 years now 🎉

[@vuyomzilikazi4229]

Sorry you went through that.

[@gailwhite5478]

I always wondered why he kissed like a little boy attempting to copy adults with a big smack, never "making out." I finally realized that this was probably because, even though he was his age intellectually and chronologically, his personality disorder caused him to be an emotional toddler without adult emotions that could be conveyed in a kiss. So tragic that these people go through life pretending to have adult emotions and hoping that their acting jobs are convincing. This is why they lie, rage, dish out days of silent treatment, play victim, and try to devalue their partners. It took years for me to figure out why he avoided kissing. How would a two- year-old kiss? Adult passion? Nope. Not even close.

[@elcee7800]

Gail, I couldn’t have described it better! Wow, yes! You’d think that would have been a big alarm bell going off for us, right? Do you think their new toddler mates will succumb to their overwhelming passion?

[@christineburton2540]

The first words out of my narcissist's mouth after we kissed for the first time was: "You kiss almost as good as I do." No joke. For real! 😆

[@LidiaGonzalez-ne8uy]

It took me 10 year to figure out what didn’t feel a normal relationship, something just didn’t ever feel right until one day I came across a narcissist video then I was able to put a name to it

[@suegilmartin3709]

@@LidiaGonzalez-ne8uy I wasted 14 years of my life, being married to a Narc. I couldn't figure out what was wrong with him. Once I pegged him for a narcissist, he moved out, into his next supply and still with her after, at least, 18 years. She maybe hasn't figured him out or decided to put up with his crap. I'm remarried now to a normal, decent guy. I am blessed.

[@LidiaGonzalez-ne8uy]

@@suegilmartin3709 I’m so glad for you I’ve been married 10 still together but has affected my daughter since it’s a cold no emotion marriage I can’t even say relationship there’s nothing of it

[@earlofmar7987]

If you are experiencing this from your dating partner, GET AWAY FROM THEM. Next, they will tell you to go to bed by yourself. Or more explicitly, "go get started by yourself". And they'll get themselves ready by looking at some nasty magazine. This is meant to be a put down to the way you look, smell or feel. Get away from them. They are evil.

[@samw1se607]

This is really weird. My ex made this “joke” to me

[@earlofmar7987]

@@samw1se607 I'm female, so the Narc in my life was a guy. I wanted out of the marriage & he threw all kinds of threats my way. But then assured me, "We would be better friends". Even suggested we go to Las Vegas, where we might be able to rekindle out relationship. What a joke that was. He behaved himself. Didn't drool over the women but then he didn't drool over me either. I was stupid for falling for his crap.

[@samw1se607]

@@earlofmar7987 wow. It’s just such a nasty character being and as time has gone on you realise more of these people exist, stay vigilant for your own well-being

[@earlofmar7987]

@@samw1se607 Yes, and stay out of Las Vegas. That's where my ex-narc moved too. He was so drawn to it, he moved there. There, the narc can get every supply they need, from drugs to porn. Right down, to reinventing themselves every night, as they stay on the prowl, looking for their next victim. I think, as we learn more about their behaviors from each other, and realize we 'weren't the only ones', going thru this; the better-off, we are. We can heal. They will be miserable. And, they don't deserve to see or hear from you. You are better than they are. Take care & stay safe!!!

[@shirleytravis7953]

😢I’m done ✅

[@phoenixrising8007]

They are disconnected from emotional intimacy ... It is non existent

[@orianam9835]

Because they froze as children. Very sad and hewrbreaking how these people were hurt

[@slfloveclub7386]

It’s shocking to see how many other people have gone through this as well…it makes me sick to think I went years without knowing I was dating a sociopath… now we have a toddler and I feel deeply saddened that I didn’t realize this sooner. He tries to make my life hell any chance he gets and co parenting with him is a nightmare. I even catch him smirking when he makes me or my child cry. Sometimes I think about moving with no warning. Trying to get back to myself slowly but surely.

[@DavidSmith-ki2we]

Girl get away from that crazy guy!

[@sweetiehogg7249]

I doing that very thing. I lost enough time with this terrible life..

[@nehaanand7099]

Do so. I recently did only to have him back haunting & tormenting me.. Trapping me, getting the supply, feeling me in a state of craving, years, requests with 5secs kiss initiation of smioch n dn stopping. No hugs, no connection, no emotions, only pretence n dn blame shifting, gaslighting, pull back etc etc followed. Trying to regain myself since last night after 3days of drainage of time energy true emotions & tears. Made me feel guilty, self doubt etc etc thanks to these videos. I hope to recover today itself.

[@ApocalypseofMichael]

Ever so carefully, tactfully run away with your baby. He will destroy you and your relationship with your child by turning them against you. You are Gold, know your worth lovely ❤

[@7ChakrasTarot]

Terrifying

[@SkyePhoenix]

Sometimes, he'd let me kiss him passionately... I felt unwanted, undesirable most of the time.

[@jodavis650]

Yep

[@ProfessionalDancer58]

exactly

[@carmelpedraza1113]

Yeah…. He let you kiss him….was it like he was dead? Feel ya

[@SkyePhoenix]

@@carmelpedraza1113 Most of the time, yes... occasionally he'd kiss me back... He was consistently inconsistent 😐

[@shawnadeyo]

When I met my ex narc we kissed. One time. I went on to date this thing on and off for the next eight years and we never kissed again. Whenever I wanted to kiss him he would turn his head. So after a few more times of being rejected when trying to kiss him I just stopped trying. This is so accurate and it all makes sense now.

[@vivianaaugustin4154]

Yes same here. It all makes sense. It all stopped after our wedding. Kisses like a bird or a two tear old

[@marlobx7442]

Wow that's deep

[@shilohbreigh3591]

Or find an excuse to walk away!!!

[@gabriellenunery6938]

This is happening to me right now and it is everyday….

[@artsylady3187]

same with my guy....kissed me for the first few weeks and then declared that he didn't like kissing and wasn't going to do it anymore...and was that a deal breaker...OMG I should have said YES... but dumb me keeps seeing him and no more kisses....and so many other strange things....never spent a penny on me in 2 years....not one penny....uggggg

[@karishort1891]

Literally -- I was with a narcissist for years and was screw#@ without ever getting kissed 😢

[@cherichappell2340]

Me too or caressing or anything

[@The_Mim]

Same. And, same. I'm still married unfortunately and cannot get out. I'm stuck.

[@wanderlustfinds]

Everything they do is transactional.

[@mariapena9157]

Me too…. 😮😢 I’m so glad to listening to this bc I always thought it was me….. that I wasn’t good enough to kiss

[@SpicyLady842]

Me too.

[@lynngeary7318]

Thank you for this talk about kissing with a narcissist. I thought it was just me! My ex wouldn’t romantically kiss me after we were married. Let alone before. Just the pecks. I remember crying when I realized he would never open mouth kiss me. I was married, but could not enjoy kissing! It was the beginning of numerous ways he hurt me, and slowly destroyed my self esteem. He hated it if I initiated sex, and always said no. It hurt me so much to be rejected but I learned to never show any hurt or reaction, or to completely mute my sex drive. It took me years to heal after divorcing him. 13 years later I finally took a lover…a non-narcissistic real lover, and that healed me. My sexual healing 🎶🎶 I am grateful every day that I got away from him.

[@dr.jenniferma3914]

Muted sex drive. This was me for years because he was so cold and withholding while having sex with someone else. I didn't know what was wrong but I thought I could be patient and take the pressure off. I remember wondering, is it my breath, is it my belly, is it my hairy legs, am I too desperate seeming, am I boring in bed, am I not enough?

[@cmmochalatte]

I must have been with an exception. My NPD ex husband would aggressively kiss me with his tongue down my throat. He was a porn addict and a wannabe alpha so I think he was expressing what he thought was masculine. I gave him cues to slow down and kiss softer but he never got the hint. Of course if I expressed displeasure all Hell would have broken loose so I went with it. After 15 years of that I’m actually the one who hates kissing now.

[@walkyria1]

All NPD are porn addicts. My NPD ex is too. Reason I DIVORCED him when I found out about the Pornography...and along with that, I found out he is a Narcissist as well. COVERT NARCISSIST!

[@VeledaG]

Shoving one´s tongue down someone´s throat is not kissing - it´s purely sexual, something completely devoid of emotion and love.

[@saturdayschild8535]

Exactly. I stopped kissing them because every kiss was like a scene from their favorite movie. Yuck. I hated it.

[@cmmochalatte]

@@VeledaG Your'e so right and after reflecting I remember that the only time he kissed me anyway was to initiate sex. I have forgotten that couples also kiss to greet or say goodbye. We never did that. Thanks for the 💡so I guess the vid was spot on after all.

[@zullmiramajid475]

😂😂🤣🤣🤣

[@darcybarwick3766]

Demons don’t like to kiss ..FULLSTOP

[@rbin5156]

%100 they use abuse and take what ever they can from anyone and EVERYONE. Its sickening, it doesn't matter who they are or what they look like. Young, old, married or single. As long as they get what they want anything and everything goes

[@chrispalmer3969]

they are excuses for humans

[@ever-3232]

So true… OR THE SISTER! The sister did everything for him , like if it was her husband and later found out they got attracted to each other. 🤢 🤮 Seems they don’t care whom it is as long as they get attention to fill that void they have within themselves. IMMORALITY *

[@rosierb852]

My ex revealed to me after I asked him why doesn’t like kissing. He told me 2yrs in that he doesn’t like kissing. He also told me that he doesn’t feel anything with kissing but wet, cold, like kissing a dead fish. That’s how he compared kissing people. I told him lips have 1000s of sensitive nerves that cause good feelings in our bodies. They are like this and think there is nothing wrong with them. That just one out of 100s of other issues they have! Like they don’t even like cuddling and sex is very robotic. Yet they see nothing wrong with their behaviour. He even told me with all seriousness that there is nothing wrong with him.

[@orianam9835]

Because they do not know any better and are constructed like this. Dead Fish 😉😉😉 this cracked me up

[@kimbutton4419]

What if he's just not into kissing? As simple as that? Same way other people might not be into anal or something. You could just respect his preferences

[@luciaparente5575]

​@@kimbutton4419???????

[@israelitequeen86]

If damaged beyond repair was a person....narcs 🙄🙄🙄

[@Marsase]

You know... I wish they taught us at school what is narcissism. I learned at 24yo after struggling to achieve standards that where not humanly. And now I got heart palpitations, PTSD, no documents or clothes. And I'm still determined to be happy in my life!!!

[@GregtheGrey6969]

Your teachers are covert narcs...all of them

[@zpop]

lifting you up in prayer that our Creator will restore the years the locust ate.

[@CynthiaSchoenbauer]

To me kissing is affectionate, a little like hugging. They have no affection. I went so long without affection that I forgot what it was but now this video is bringing back the memory of feeling not only loved, but worthy of it! Thank you very much STN!! This is a very revealing video for me. 🤓

[@adeledorman6447]

You think theres something wrong with you because of their treatment.....

[@kallahari7542]

It's NOT going to be better. What left for you is that you are going to be and feel invisable just like them.They don't want to be in our world that is too painful for them. Reality is pain and confusing for them. They want YOu in their world, not the other way around.

[@saturdayschild8535]

I stopped kissing the narc after they cheated several times. Disgust.

[@JumpWatson45]

Yep that's me I swear one day he came home and kissed me out of the blue !ND I smelled another women's vagina. I told him that I get disgusted by cheaters so he went out of his way to try and cheat on me. Now he is begging me to take him back and I am like no ur a nasty hoe

[@The_Mim]

Same

[@lionheartklaric3729]

The last narc didn't like romantic kissing so this all makes sense. They don't want to be vulnerable.

[@motorcyclerider3956]

All of this creeps up on you over time and makes you feel confused, sad, angry and many other emotions. In the end you start to feel exhausted from it all and feel a shadow of your former self. You really find out things are not good when you discover videos like this on numerous KZbin channels. I must admit to watching quite a few and find most educational and helpful in understanding whats been going on in my relationship with a narcissist.

[@tomdebevoise]

Agree with this, the kissing part went away when we were married and I spent many years yearning for the occasional lingering rub on the shoulder. In one part of our marriage, she would almost never acknowledge me when she came into the house. Moreover the sex is ... basically humiliating, most narcs will cheat and will leave little clues that is happening. Speaking as a male, the clues were sexy panties and bras (including stains) you never saw worn. Mine also left makeup and jewelry. There is a parallel male narc side I am sure. If you are in a relationship like this GTFO!, you will never fix it, it will never get better. It will just grind you down.

[@november1966]

Oh my gosh!

[@sgtmuffinbadger6147]

Yes thank God someone made a video about this.

[@cubanita365]

Mine would never ACTUALLY kiss me later on in our relationship. He would just press his lips against mine for a second but no actual kiss. It's like he thought as long as our lips had touched it was good enough. He'd give me a blank stare when I'd say he hadn't actually kissed me. I always thought it was bizarre.

[@megnotch9929]

This is so affirming!!! I had resigned myself to a life without one of my favorite things- kissing & making out. I thought it was my breathe. I wondered if she was insecure about lip hair (mustache). I was convinced that she had some past abusive experience where she was kissed against her will or in some power imbalanced relationship. I’m opening my eyes and this stands out as MAJOR evidence in the pattern of abuse.

[@rockybalboa4593]

I’m a gay man and mine ended after my ex took a 10 day trip to Italy and came back completely distant. He never told me any details about the trip whatsoever or who he was even going with. I assumed family or friends because he was Italian. I later found out he was visiting a married gay couple who lived there while over there. I’m left with such a sleazy feeling because I’m sure things went down behind my back. Of course he came back distant. He was involved with someone else for 10 days. All he did when he came back was make plans with friends and never call me to talk about his trip or anything. And when I called it out, I got accused of being needy and told “you’re damn right I’m going to prioritize my friends first over someone I’ve only recently begun dating!!!” By this point I hadn’t seen him for 17 days. I was never trying to intrude on his time with friends. I just wanted maybe an hour to get dinner together or a short phone call to see how his trip was. He also never liked to kiss and now I know why. He also didn’t like me putting my arm around him out in public. He wanted to be seen as available at all times for future supply. These people are so unimaginably cruel.

[@aleacejordan]

So sad 😢

[@lh4615]

So hurtful! You weren’t being needy, you just wanted to touch base, as any invested person would want to do. Sounds like you’re better off without that nonsense. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with wanting a healthy connection with someone, including kissing, touches and conversation. Hugs to you ❤

[@abutterfly7975]

They don’t iniate intimacy, like kissing, hand holding, cuddling, sex, compliments. You can feel they are vacant if you initiate something, no passion…….and they will never admit to it.

[@kenp9596]

Thank you. Now I understand why she is the only person I have been in a relationship with who won't kiss me. I suspected she was a narcissist and this just confirms it.

[@stacyjaye6350]

The same for me. And I've been with my fair share of women. Mine got me like, compromised LOL and then wouldn't kiss me! Freaking humiliation. Maybe that was the point?

[@cristoutheophanous1108]

I've had the exact same experience with my ex wife ( covert female narcissist) ,it's actually a rude awakening.

[@lovepeace2137]

I stay to help him because I want him to be happy but I realize he is happy being a cold deceitful lying child and only happy if I'm miserable. He's 61 and I have had more mature conversations with children. But he says " you made me like this..i was never like this before you, you're shot, you need help. Why can't we start over from scratch and leave past in past?" It's only been a year together ... Could've aged twenty already but I'm trying to turn his abuse into my strength.. I'm getting out alive. We are survivors, overcomers, now we thrive! Best wishes to all.... Stay strong and stand in Truth!

[@cherput88]

I wish i know earlier, i lost myself but now I'm free from narc and I'm on a healing path.. hope i will find myself again soon 😍

[@earthfriendlydesignhub725]

This video just helped me solve the puzzle i had when i was in a mind altering situationship with a narc. Wherever i want to kiss him he gave one excuse or another.

[@jada8944]

Makes so much sense now! It’s crazy how I was a victim of narcissistic abuse for so many years but all this information didn’t come out until after the relationship was over . Wish I would’ve understood all this then .

[@shaneerobinson415]

So true out of a 20 year relationship I can count on one hand how many times I was actually kissed… hmmm just have to laugh now

[@teresitaekim2565]

My health is important to me. I don't kiss a narcissist. Who knows who he is kissing behind my back. Let alone kissing, I won't sleep with him. He can move wherever that other woman is.

[@dehsa38]

Very useful for victims of narcissistic parents! You might see the same traits, in you, that the narcissist has. But that doesn't mean you're a narcissist, that was the only model you had. Now, you can do something else.

[@charlie-girl72]

I feel dirty all the time. Like I'm not good enough. Abusers can act like a little kid. Even kids are better I can't explain this. I was his mommy. Not his partner now he turned 42 still not really changed its hwll. I can't kiss someone who is immature

[@elcee7800]

So glad somebody came up with this video!!! I always noticed this from our early dating! I was like wtf???!!

[@Devarapalli]

Yes I am in love with narcissist, You have told the exact facts accurately, mind blowing analysis

[@s.martinez1717]

This explains a lot: now I understand why my narc partner, while she kisses me, her eyes look away. She felt I caught her on this various times but keeps falling back into old patterns all the time.

[@Pyrrhic537]

Most people look away or close eyes. Were her eyes open?

[@pocahontas4583]

This is crazy because literally for YEARS of our marriage he didn’t kiss me at ALL. He wanted s*x constantly but no kisses, hugs, nothing. When I would try to kiss him he would claim to be mad at me about something until I eventually stopped trying. Then he would also complain that I never “come on to him” (initiate s*x), well to me affection would lead to that. When he was going through a love bombing phase he started kissing me again after many years and admitted he forgot what it even felt like.

[@Pyrrhic537]

But for you to want to kiss him the sex was probably good. They are often good at it or we'll endowned. Maybe that overinflates their egos.

[@dr.jenniferma3914]

Yes when they're hoovering you they suddenly remember how to make love and kiss passionately. I suspected that when he stopped kissing me and foreplay with me it was because he was kissing someone else. They only have so much to give their supply.

[@brendawarner5415]

I always have thought that I must have bad breath....but at least some of these reasons seem likely.

[@IndianSumaira]

He literally said that to my face and I still try to hold my breath around him, I am already trapped I can't do anything now

[@badabbelt]

God I never thought about it in this way but eyes open 🙄

[@menonat]

I wondered always why my ex-narc used to hardly kiss, like just little kid smacks, it was very disappointing since I liked to kiss her passionately, but there was nothing in return , only sided... I feel pitty for her, which i shouldn't continue, it's hard and not easy to accept after so many good videos like these, but I have seen so many that these really helped me to finally accept that I was with a narcissist, I'm still healing :-)

[@antheaoneill9342]

I thought I had bad breathe 😂😂😂

[@mariagargus7726]

He gaslighted me saying he was insecure about his kissing. Another time said he thought french kissing was gross and tried to make me feel ashamed for wanting to make out. Thank you for the video.This makes perfect sense now.

[@joywebster2678]

The narc told me my kissing was awful so he never would let me near for a kiss. I'm just glad he wasn't my first date because I had never had anyone complain about my kissing before. So he'd permit a kiss on his cheek like he was my granddad

[@cynthiajohnson9412]

Thank you so much for this video. I have to say, those of us who have been in relationships with narcissists have always been aware of these voids on some level but, especially if you've been with a covert and/or were raised by a covert, you could never really put your finger on what was missing. It helps tremendously to put words to these feelings and especially to know you aren't alone in the experience or weren't 'just expecting too much'. That was the narcs in my life goto excuse. The problem wasn't their cold, withholding natures, the problem was my standards and expectations were too high.

[@PassionateFlower]

Yes everything you said is so true and has been my experience as well😞💔🥀 The problem is they are in fact the problem but they want to think everyone else is the problem except them because they would rather die before they ever admit they were the problem all along. And then they do die thinking they still were never the problem, just misunderstood heroes who were never admired or appreciated enough the way they feel they should have been considering how no one is "smart" enough to "understand" just how truly "genius and great" they are. No matter how successful they become or how many people sing their praise they still feel like no one truly knows the full depths of their greatness and this enrages them. How can such a "perfect, superior" being ever be expected to cater to the "pathetic lowly absurd demands" of his inferiors? His slaves? His minions? Why would a coffee drinker cater to the demands of his morning coffee? That coffee is meant for a single purpose, to be drank and consumed solely for the narcissist's benefit, then quickly forgotten about. He doesn't need to ask the coffee's permission to be drank. He doesn't need to worry about having to call or text the coffee the next day or listening to coffee's feelings or "drama". The coffee no longer exists to the narcissist after it's been consumed. He's already thinking about the next thing he will eat or drink to serve him and his body😔.

[@noeliasnell85]

My deepest hurt goes to all that commented 🙏 I too am a victim of such monster at 35yrs of marriage last 3 yrs I can see his narcissism worsening yes the kissing and caressing, cuddling, and caring have gone away but still keeping me handy I am getting prepared for when he decides I am not needed, I am worthy of my self I love me to much to give in to his plays now so when he stopped kissing I stopped giving I am just a roommate. I do love him and care about him as a human being because I love and wish him wellness 🙏 to all many blessings and hugs ❤🙏

[@dr.jenniferma3914]

They love to make you feel needy. Mine made me feel needy for wanting eye contact when I talked to him and for wanting him not to interrupt me with, "Look at that dog over there."

[@amandalidey329]

That's true. The "pecks" explains everything!

[@amandalidey329]

@roxyrhodes3035 That's ashame . I'm sorry u went thru that.

[@kellyhewittangleberger1557]

I was with a guy who would kiss like that. Honestly it really hurt so bad. I thought it was me, maybe I wasn't good at kissing but I knew that wasn't true. He also would never go to a movie unless HE wanted to see it. He would never walk with me, he was always walking ahead of me. I felt so empty inside. I blamed it on myself. I thought maybe he wasn't attracted to me but no, he wanted sex which he was HORRIBLE at. He did make the comment he didn't like kissing, they must all go to that excuse. I should have said that I didn't like having sex and given him a dose of his own medicine. Once I left the relationship and found my current husband I realized what I was missing out on for so long.

[@RD-yc6dg]

Compared to sex, the way she kissed felt weird. Never really committed like performing a chore. Now it all makes perfect sense.

[@juliemclain4430]

I always wondered about this.

[@greggwolffis7211]

This applies to both male and female narcissists.

[@mezlandia]

People who have narcissistic traits can be confused with people who fear true intimacy.

[@natashacastro71]

First reasonable comment.

[@EmsLionheart]

If it’s a fear, it can be faced, and fixed, but only if the person wants to truly grow, in order to be happy and make those around them happy. If one chooses not to, then that is called narcissism. No one is asking for too much here. At. All. 🕊️

[@7w7-2]

Unfortunately, infidelity tends to go hand in hand with narcissism. Especially, somatic narcissism. Narcissists believe EVERYTHING they need is external, including self-worth, self-esteem, validation, etc. Those things are what make up our inner world and we are supposed to develop and cultivate them within/on our own. Narcissists DEPEND on people to supply those things for them. Because we cannot (nor, are we supposed to) supply every want/need of a partner, narcissists are always on the lookout for "better supply". They will always gravitate toward anyone they feel can meet the needs/wants their spouse isn't (and can't). Narcissists are unstable and they cannot soothe themselves. They cannot meet their own needs and their needs/wants are constantly changing. Narcissists are black holes. They are human abyss' of unmet needs/wants. Even if you gave them everything, they'd still want MORE... All while giving NOTHING in return. Narcissists are also pathologically bored. They do not experience boredom the way normal adults do. They're like children. Once they become bored, they tend to throw their toys (people) in a corner to collect dust. Then, they search for new ones... Untilllll, they realize that their newest toy isn't as fun. Or, it doesn't function as well as the old toy did. Then, they'll go digging in the corner to find that old toy (the reason their relationships tend to be off and on). People are objects meant to keep them occupied and entertained. The newer the toy, the better/more exciting it is. However, EVERYONE will inevitably lose their shine with the narcissist. You must accept their reality and realize that it's NOT ABOUT YOU and it never was. This is also the point when it becomes crucial to sit your ego on the curb. Your ego will want to fight to be seen. Your ego will want to fight to prove you're enough. Your ego will feel it's "worthy" of the narcissist and fight to "keep" them... But, again: IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU. Most narcissists are extremely irresponsible. Many of them marry to secure stability. Or, to have someone they can count on to help with bills to free up their resources. It also ensures they'll have somewhere safe to land when they fall - because they always f*** up... Do yourself a favor and pull that rug of security out from under them and save YOURSELF. Narcissists do not have a moral compass. They do not respect the union of marriage. It'll always be a one-sided arrangement with you being the giver that's making their life easier and them being the taker that's making your life harder. We deserve the same love, attention, support and understanding that we give our spouses. You will never get it from someone suffering with NPD. Moreover, if you feel sure that your husband might never cheat on you, you might have to rethink. Most wives in marriages are shocked when they find out their husband cheating, and it happens more with people who never thought they would cheat. This is why you have to take the tiniest suspicion carefully. If your husband is cheating on you, the best and probably the only guaranteed way to catch him is to spy on their phones. However, spying on a phone is not something you can do without any external help unless you have the James bond level of spy skills. In such case you will need an expert phone spyier Metaspyhub@gmail. com for the purpose,,,

[@louisetaylor6952]

I read through the comments and I don't understand why so many people stay with someone who causes them such pain (and this treatment causes real emotional pain) ...when someone starts to treat you badly why not just realize this stinks and stop spending time with that person...I feel so sad for these people, it's heartbreaking to hear how they have been treated

[@joannacrehan4405]

It’s because most of us had narc parents .. we were never treated any better and don’t know the difference .. it’s a trauma bond

[@siqbal8586]

Its trauma bond.

[@siqbal8586]

Its trauma bond.

[@debraannedimezza8075]

This explains why there was never any public affection and we used to go out a lot. He was in the entertainment business we would go out together, and he would make sure his barstool was pulled a good 2 feet from me with his right shoulder, always turned away, so I was basically looking at the side of him and his back I used to have men approach me thinking I was sitting at the bar alone And I would watch couples interact at the bar and it used to break my heart because I would always get ignored. I thought he was embarrassed being with me in public and that was the furthest thing from the truth. There’s not many women that look like me I am unique and I’m approached no matter where I go by men, but these videos explains so much we’ve been separated six months I’m just now starting to breathe and going to therapy

[@HelloTuuuurdz]

Yes, exactly! Every time we go to a bar, I’m completely facing him while he sits completely straight. He’s told me that he was embarrassed by public affection when it wasn’t like that in the beginning. He walks ahead of me all the time. Gives me peck kisses and talks to me in a baby voice saying “you so cute” instead of ever telling me I look pretty, or likes what I’m wearing. I get hit on constantly and know I’m attractive. It been about a year now and his lack of intimacy has gotten worse. I started watching these vids and now it’s all making sense. It’s not me being overbearing or asking for too much. That’s just the way he is. He tells me he loves me all the time, but nothing to back it up. He’ll text me that he misses me when I’m at work at a long shift, but I come home and he won’t even look up from his phone while I’m like hey baby!! It’s so disheartening. I see what’s actually going on now. The shitty thing is I moved to be with him after a beautiful long distance courtship. Now I’m secretly making my exit plan. I know he’ll tell everyone I used him, when I’m reality, it was the other way around. He’s sucking me dry. I just gotta stay focus and although it’s going to hurt, I gotta leave.

[@crumpetclaire9690]

Spot on. I was with one for 12 years. Then went for a somatic. Nearly healed now though! 😊

[@luist3756]

Me too i was with one for 13 years and I’m healing now. I’m happy for both of us. 🙏💪🏼

[@crumpetclaire9690]

@@luist3756 taken me years! I started this journey 2016 - same time the world nosedived into the narcissistic abyss! But my programming went along further. Childhood. Glad you're on the way out...😘😘

[@SkyePhoenix]

How do you know when you're "nearly healed?"

[@The_Mim]

​@Perry Skye Phoenix in my opinion it's lifelong. There is always something new to learn.

[@ani2756]

AND WE BLAME OURSELVES 😢

[@ejakaegypt]

Mom is a narcissist Her and my dad have been married for over 30 years but I don’t ever remember them kissing ever

[@joywebster2678]

Mine too, my parents gave a cheek peck only when Dad left for work. Never saw handholding either.

[@iamresilient341]

I remember trying to kiss the Narc when we first started talking and he said he didn’t kiss, and I said why not? I like to kiss so we began to kiss from there on out. No pecks either. However I will never forget thinking every time we did kiss that he couldn’t really kiss that good. I guess it’s because he didn’t really kiss to begin with. Now I’m wondering if he would kiss me because that’s what I liked doing. Hmmm 🤔 probably so. I was with him for a long time too. I say I was with him because he was never with me I learned after it was all over. Oh well! Idc I’m the one who got away and is NEVER EVER going back to nightmare on Hell street. So he doesn’t have to worry about anymore kisses from me or anything else for that matter. I’m Living my best life and I won’t ever put me last again! I hate how I had to learn the lesson but trust and believe the message has been received loud and clear. 3 1/2 yrs of complete NC. I now can laugh about a lot of the BS I fell for. No worries it won’t happen again! I am very grateful and moving forward. ☺️

[@GuardianAngel..]

@I am Resilient you are a Genius you just gave me an idea for what I can name My latest Book check this out "A Nightmare On Hell Street" Pretty Good Huh?

[@coldawson8486]

Good job. Well done Mines 12yrs But empaths always attract them A friend for a few year's. Definitely a narcissist. But I didn't know such people existed. It was a very good learning curve for me watching this person manipulate individual characters. Male or female It amused me how most thought he was absolutely wonderful. Certainly charasmatic. But the dark moody side was the thing that always kept me at arms length Sadly drug's, drinking and smoking has taken its toll. And cancer has ended his system. But he still gets on. The chemotherapy tablets will fix it. So still smokes and drinks to excess

[@iamresilient341]

@@GuardianAngel.. Go for it!!

[@danielaspitz3052]

My covert Narc ex didn't give any type of intimacy. no touching, caressing, petting. He hated being touched and didn't give any of this. but he's a Sex addict and cheated emotionally. I cried a million tears because there was no real closeness. I felt like a baby probably when lacking warmth and care.

[@artsylady3187]

same with my guy......it hurts to be treated so badly....it hurts real real bad

[@emmanuelduru4942]

That's because they are demons in human form and demons have no soul

[@michaelcollins2399]

They truly are despicable human beings

[@dr.jenniferma3914]

I believe they know they're torturing us. It's what makes them high.

[@annthomson5648]

Yes they r

[@patrixjude1]

Thanks for explaining this. I got exactly this behaviour from the last 2 narcs I was involved with. It drove me crazy and made me frustrated, angry, disappointed etc.

[@scottmeth9019]

I felt LIKE I WAS KISSING A GHOST I FELT NO PASSION OR EMOTIONAL INTIMACY IT WAS PURELY TRANSACTIONAL

[@orionexplorer]

I was married almost 16 years to a narcissist, she is now my ex-wife for the last 22 years. She behaved exactly the way you described in the video. I am remarried though my wife of 22 years has many of the same traits as my ex, she loves, gives, looks out for my welfare all the time. I am a disabled veteran suffering from PTSD. My ex could not understand that I was different now because of my experiences. My wife as I said of 22 years does understand and helps.

[@ednamason8336]

God can heal you. Eat whole foods and the best omega oils. You okay 👍

[@juliebirchenall2107]

How very sad for them and anyone unfortunate enough to fall for the facade.

[@Foxfire004]

Omg. I often wondered this. My ex was a super passionate kisser in the beginning. But after a few months, he would never kiss me except a peck on the lips or the cheek. No more makeout sessions. It drove me nuts! I love to kiss. Truth is, I never thought he was a good kisser. Passionate but not good.

[@moonrakertv5]

I had one chick snatch away from me when I attempted to kiss and caress her! It’s hurtful but then I realized it must be something mental!

[@dennisrobinson8008]

You're not important to them. In their paradigm you are an object or thing to be used. They won't have strong feelings to you, actually your pain and annoyance will get on their nerves. This is why it's done.

[@HelloTuuuurdz]

Facts.

[@dennisrobinson8008]

@@HelloTuuuurdz Thanks for reminding me

[@user-of9bx1uk3u]

This is True to the Tea ☕️ 😊

[@SA-ud9nf]

Wow! No wonder there was hardly kissing or affection anytime or during love making. OMG! I was so naive. Thank you. 😲. 💖

[@Koda19651]

I could never figure out why my guy never kissed me during our time of being intimate. I thought he wasn’t attracted to me. he would only kiss me like fake kiss if he wanted me too pleasure him that was the only thing.

[@SkyePhoenix]

No affection... And he wouldn't touch me, unless I asked him to. He liked it rough. That's the only way he liked it. Once, when he was desperate for someone to service him... he went out of his way to come and get me. He told me "you know I love you" very quietly almost unintelligible. Then he called me a "whore" without my consent. Sometimes I wonder if maybe I'm a bit of a masochist. Nah, I think I'm just messed up in the head from all of the trauma/abuse that I've endured over the years.

[@karenkennedy6331]

My husband does not like kissing! Never has, withdrawals quickly, too vulnerable, too close!

[@ND-or5so]

In their heads must be some type of war. I got here first! I know you are but what am I? And so on. When I realized the mindset of this Narcissist, wow I robbed the cradle and this is a 50 year old man- supposedly. What a freak show. So disturbing. They need to be in a secured environment and examined around the clock for they are NOT human.

[@OlBlueshound]

I just rewatched this video again and it's as if you knew my ex partner so well. I am so amazed that this video describes her personality so accurately because I didn't know what a narcissist was until just recently. Thank you for posting this.

[@dannyflood9212]

Why is this only about male narcissists? My ex female narcissist fits this profile to the tee.

[@jamescalhoun4588]

Right !

[@The_Mim]

They just used female vernacular. This can pertain to either gender.

[@lorettascott5477]

It's not she hasn't mentioned sexes. Even the comments are about both

[@sharontaylor2243]

I really needed to hear this today

[@angelabyrne4384]

This makes me chuckle now as I had a liason with a narccissit and he said he didn't know how to kiss, I said you better learn and fast, I was pashing with him for ages that must have dam near killed him 🤣🤣🤣🤣.I wasn't aware what I was dealing with at the time, but his mask fell off, and the ghosting and smear campaigns erupted, I was bitterly disappointed in him. I am healing from it all and I have turned my back on him.

[@mangakamaiden]

He didn’t kiss, he slobbered until he withheld

[@mariannekoroleva6495]

They just have nothing to give...unlike GOD. Thank You!!:))!!

[@Tinymini17]

Thank you for this I always knew something was off when he mentioned that

[@v.nikkijohnson]

The title of this video in and of itself told me A LOT. I'm at the 7th tip and haven't heard anything that I can't relate to at this very minute.

[@neorev01]

I stopped kissing my wife years ago because I couldn't kiss the mouth that could say such awful things to me

[@rrtlife2167]

I completely understand and feel that!

[@The_Mim]

I stopped kissing my husband after he wouldn't stop cheating and lying about literally anything

[@DrJoaoMaglianoNeto]

Well… That explains A LOT about my ex. Since the time we start dating to all the 5 years we were married. At the very end when I said that I intended to divorce, kisses became much better between other things, but I have divorced anyway, enough manipulation. You have explained a lot to me.

[@syedasultana333]

Exactly.. 💯%correct👍🏻 thanku so much👍🏻

[@cherylduckworth11]

I dated a fella for a little while. And I asked him why he didn't kiss.. he didn't really answer but a day or two later he walked up out of the blue and gave me the most fantastic sexy French kiss, about knocking off my feet. I guess it was just to prove a point and then he never kissed me again. Lucky me, he went back to his ex-wife. What a barren way that would have been to live. That 10 month situationship left me cold. I find I still do not want a steady person in my life after such weird experience

[@charlotteclark6061]

Yes. My dude just put his lips on me, no pucker...I was like. .. That's not a kiss! Smh..dork!

[@conniecampbell3201]

This is so right on!!! 👍🏼

[@13271969]

out of all the things that I can relate is true no one has ever touched on this kissing situation. I absolutely 100% have been through this in my own life. It has been over six years for sure there’s more I just can’t remember what it stopped.This is ridiculous.

[@debbiepeterson6829]

I knew 4 hours after saying our vows. He then informed me he didn't like kissing and there would be no kissing.

[@artsylady3187]

did he kiss you before the wedding ??? that is horrible...I am so sorry....mine won't kiss me either and it hurts so very very very much

[@amygreen6017]

After being with a narcissist I vowed to never date again. Still going strong.

[@thetruth9652]

I didn’t date for 11 years. After I healed from wounds inflicted upon me by the nutcase a wonderful man found me. After seven months we are engaged. He is such a pleasant change. I love him so much and I know that he loves me back.

[@rebeccahowie7234]

Me too!! I got Trump walls built around me 😉

[@artsylady3187]

that is about what I am thinking too.....I never want to go through this again...OMG worst in my life....broke me down, killed my soul and spirit., destroyed my self esteem., and yet I loved him....not any more and never again

[@dr.jenniferma3914]

In this dating climate, I'm feeling the same. I'm noticing that people do all sorts of narcissistic things: ghosting, slow-ghosting, pretending to be interested in seeing each other but not reaching out, lovebombing and strong interest initially followed by disappearance after a few weeks. It's very triggering to date again after abuse because it feels like getting abused all over again. People aren't very clear about how they really feel.

[@jimmiegregory8386]

Every bit of this and all comments are spot on😮

[@Shadowwarrior2288]

He would get irritated if I tried being too affectionate with him. Couldn't even hold my hand or hug me in public. After awhile I thought he was embarrassed of me. Also he said I would be nothing without him.

[@missminti]

They absolutely make you feel like they don't want to be seen with you.