ENOUGH is ENOUGH! | Men Are DYING! | Men's Mental Health

[@themancuniancandidate2744]

A friend of mine killed himself (I prefer that term for its impact) 5 years ago. He was a successful and well-loved school principal, he was comfortably a property asset millionaire, and a real life-and-soul-of-the-party kind of character. He hung himself from his bedroom doorknob aged 51. His suicide note was heartbreaking. He felt worthless, and that his family would be better off without him because at least then they would be free of having him as a burden and they'd inherit his money. Scott, I know you can't read this...but your family and friends loved you for who you were, not your money. And our lives are diminished now that you aren't with us any more.

[@40OverFashion]

This is so sad. Every one of these stories is sad.

[@themancuniancandidate2744]

@@40OverFashion The sad thing is that so many of us have a friend or relative who succumbed to The Black Dog, as it's known here in Australia. It's a bloody pandemic.

[@omarcortes5754]

Mental health is extremely important and there nothing to feel ashamed for. As men we tend to think everything is ok but is always nice to talk to someone.

[@polarbear353]

I think it is wonderful that you’re helping bringing this sensitive subject to light. My best friend as a young adult committed suicide and as you know it is extremely difficult to deal with that. I must have went through every emotion in the book. Sadness, grief, regret and yes guilt. I just didn’t see it coming, you learn to go on but it is a burden that you carry with you. My hat is off to you my friend for talking about this, I think we as men need to do this more.

[@freepatriot9629]

I lost my best friend too.. I feel your pain.

[@polarbear353]

@@freepatriot9629 thank you and I’m sorry for your loss. I don’t know if they think about the people they leave behind. It’s a tragedy that definitely needs to be brought out into the light more.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you!

[@madcappiktures]

I had an appointment with my shrink just this morning, and I completely broke down in her office. Hopefully I’ll see a therapist asap, since it’s obvious I have a long way ahead until I’m recovered from this mental illness. I beg of you; PLEASE get help if you’re not well.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you for sharing!

[@Sodorboy98]

I CAN'T! Nobody listens. Nobody cares. Nobody takes it seriously. I just want to sleep. Just sleep and fade away. I don't matter how, so it's not as though my disappearance would be felt. Things would be easier. Everything would... just be better. Better than this. Better than all of THIS. ...I'm scared. I'm scared of everything. I'm scared that if I reach out, everything will crumble. Or nothing would change. Nothing would help.

[@regsantotomas]

As a society, we need to continue to embrace mental health as a spectrum and not just see it as fringe cases. It is no different than accepting we all have physical health issues in one manner or another. The sooner we remove the stigma of mental health, the sooner many more will feel safe to seek the help they need.

[@40OverFashion]

Very well said Reg! Thank you!

[@joepeterbilly2922]

I morbidly read the obits while I'm lighting the fire. So often i read about a young guy, wife and kids, or not, who had everything going for him. It will say "died suddenly at home" or something similar. At the bottom, it will usually say "Donations may be made to The Canadian Mental Health Society" . You know right away. It breaks me up every time, and I hadn't even known the poor dude. Thanks John

[@40OverFashion]

It’s so sad.

[@chilipepper9938]

As a person who has worked in healthcare for 30 years. The biggest predictor of self deletion is divorce, which increases the risk to 9 to 10 times. The family and divorce is the culprit that lead a lot of men homeless. I hope men do not get married and do not allow the government into your lives

[@mgammeren]

Don't forget that people who are getting through their lowest point in depression (with suicide thoughts, you can have depression without the suicide part) are the ones you really need to watch. Statistics show that the most suicides concur during that moment. And people get to say "he was just doing better! we didn't see this coming". Well stats show they do. We really need to speak out more and address a lot of issues that are going on right now in the world.

[@chilipepper9938]

@@mgammeren exactly!

[@jaysonx5576]

Important vid, John. My ex (film agent Shari Smiley) took her life a few months ago. Despite no longer being together, it’s been difficult to move past. I’m thankful for my guy friends that we’re able to be real and share our emotions. Gotta give a shout out to us men for growing and being emotionally vulnerable in ways our fathers likely weren’t allowed to be. 👊🏾

[@40OverFashion]

So sorry about this. Thank you for sharing!

[@harryhellerman474]

I am just now learning about your brother. What sad news. This is an important topic for us all.

[@SeanA.Skeete-wd4vi]

Glad you are"mentioning" and spotlighting this topic. Being a man can be so "stressful" because we need to or "appear" to be "strong"all the time😢. Thanks again as usual😊❤🎉💯.

[@40OverFashion]

Absolutely!

[@ronm6585]

Thanks John. I've got 9 years on you and your are absolutely correct. Men were taught to keep it all in and be tough.

[@noName-kn1lx]

Need to have balance being a snowflake and staring at your navel contemplating your feelings all the time is no good either

[@40OverFashion]

Thanks Ron! Appreciate your comment!

[@zeffirethedj8480]

I'm from the Caribbean and I was raised for man to be strong and never to have any feeling of depression. That is the culture here but I grew up struggling with depression and to tell you the truth I am still battling it today, but I am trying to live one day at a time even though I am going through some serious financial troubles which have me more depressed but its a fight and I have to survive. Thank god I recently subscribed to your channel cause it interest me and I feel I can be on my way to make myself a better person. Thank You

[@DesertMav]

Great video on covering this topic. I have thought about self deletion in the past, but I concluded that it's not worth it and that I would rather work on my goals and dreams before anything like that happens. It is sad to see some of the toxic social media mock this issue and in some cases even celebrate self deletion. I just tune it out and go into nature to get me through the day.

[@40OverFashion]

Well said! Thanks for sharing!

[@MistaBaze]

I was 17 when I learned that I was a troglodyte compared to other men. I’m 28 now and I think I’ve gotten the hang of numbing myself. Now I’m not gonna do it in one go, the key is slowly. Make it look natural. Gonna do it slowly over time by not taking care of my diabetes. Never learned wtf self care or self love is anyway so none of these ‘loved ones’ will notice.

[@khalidhilate9037]

If i can*

[@josearias2121]

Excellent video, we should address this topic more often. I am 62 years old, and you have to realized that making mistakes are parts of life and parts of the learning process.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you for watching!

[@dalecarlson7294]

Thanks for doing a great job touching on a very tough subject. There are so many resources available for those struggling with their mental health. Don’t be afraid to use them yourself or recommend them to a friend who may be struggling.

[@CarlosArnezJr]

“Manning” was definitely how I was raised. To this day my family doesn’t expect me to ever show (not even to them) my thoughts and feelings. I agree that that doesn’t work most of the time anymore.

[@tonydeneri501]

Important topic, John. Thanks for putting in front and center, and treating this with dignity. Well-done.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you!

[@stylishoversixty9459]

First I want to say thanks for speaking on this very important subject, indeed we all know of someone who is perhaps struggling with challenges that they feel all alone and hopeless and there is no way out, I agree that the generation of the 50's '60s and 70's men were told "just man up" be tough everything will be okay...well that doesn't work anymore these are definitely different times...and men need to talk with someone because simply we don't have all the answers!

[@40OverFashion]

Appreciate that! Thanks for watching!

[@downpeppertreelane387]

I found out my insurance pays for 1 hour of Therapy per week. It's been fantastic, check your health plan. I've learned to deal with people directly, talk things out....

[@paulschultz5873]

Timely advice, John. Us Gen Xers don't like sharing our burdens with others, but as the old saying goes, "A problem shared is a problem halved." Great video mate, keep up the great work.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you!

[@movingart8026]

This was an authentic video, John. Thanks! Mental health is your health as well, I'm a firm believer that if you're not feeling well mentally, talk with a health professional. It's nothing to feel ashamed of...😊

[@40OverFashion]

Well said!

[@movingart8026]

Thank You, John!

[@DovahsarusRex]

These are the very issues that inspired me to start Check Your Brother. So often men will be silent and no one will check on them. We need to check on each other and maintain connections even at the most basic level.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you!

[@KevinMcClave]

Thank you, John.

[@40OverFashion]

My pleasure!

[@ianrobinson5841]

Some say it's a selfish act but if you think in most how strong survival instinct is! You do anything to stay alive! To go against that and end your life shows to me how much pain these people are in! Seek help men please 🙏

[@freepatriot9629]

We never will know how courageous they were to stay with us as long as they did.

[@aimartinmotiondancestudio518]

I needed to hear this today. Thank you.

[@40OverFashion]

My pleasure!

[@Clownboy15]

I have always struggled with depression. Guess it comes with doing comedy (I’m a clown). But when I lost my fiancée three years ago I was done in. Outwardly people thought I was doing remarkably well. But my work was starting to suffer. Clients could tell I was phoning it in when doing parties. I stepped back from entertaining thinking that would help. It didn’t. Making people laugh is what I do and am most passionate about. But how do you do you make others laugh when inside you’re dying? I finally sought the help I needed last year and am getting back on track to being the performer I was and even trying to be better!

[@40OverFashion]

Appreciate you! Thanks for sharing!

[@12ryuzacki]

Thirty years old and it was pretty much engained into me to not show or express emotion. Taught to bury everything from the age of 15 or so.

[@40OverFashion]

Exactly!

[@jongurn00]

Thank you for always discussing what needs to be discussed John! I hope anyone struggling who’s watched this video sees that they aren’t alone. We’re in this together! ✊🏻

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you!

[@paul0wen65]

John, the national suicide hotline is 988. While I understand sponsorship is important, saving a fellow man's life can't be measured in mere dollars. I wrote a poem about this issue a month ago and referenced the 4x rate for men. Good to get the word out there. We're all in this together.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you!

[@stormfield9431]

Ty for this meaningful content. Not unlike an addiction... Thoughts and ultimately the undoing of life is due to a Void. You must fill the void with something, anything that can draw out passion. Passion in life and for life is how we thrive/ survive.

[@anaveragejoeslife]

I, too, was born in the 60s. I did a career in the military. We had no room for feelings, etc. If you complained, you'd get the standard answer of "Suck it up" or "Do you need a tampon?" Probably why the military suicide rates are high. Anyway, I am glad that now that I am older, I have been able to receive some help and realize it isn't a weakness to need or to ask for that help.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you for commenting, and thank you for your service!

[@chrisb3902]

Great video John! Thanks for the discussion on mental health - very sad regarding Grayson

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you!

[@mileswoodard4278]

Another great video that needs discussion John!!

[@mattgeorge7127]

I think we all go through anxiety/depression at some point as we age. The degree may vary but we will go through it. Talking helped me to family/friends/neighbors, basically anyone who would listen. Also questioning the way you feel may help as well. Are there facts to back up your depression/anxiety and if so what are steps that can be taken to correct them. I think for me it was a feeling of not doing/being enough. I had to change my mindset to that i'm doing the best i can and not being so rigid and hard on myself. I hope all the best for all of you. Thank you so much for this video!

[@40OverFashion]

Appreciate you! Thanks for sharing!

[@meteor1237]

Never know what’s going on in someone’s mind. As a police officer I worked several; always very sad.

[@40OverFashion]

Very sad.

[@garysandberg3259]

It is why having or finding a purpose is so critical!!

[@hejiranyc]

But even if you don't have a purpose, it's okay. Life is pretty much without purpose for the vast majority of us and there is nothing wrong with that.

[@jpbanksnj]

Great video. We are loosing too many great talents and our everyday brothers and sisters to this easy escape. For me, nothing hit harder than Bourdain. I had a long history with Anthony... But he CHANGED very suddenly, and that was a sign...

[@40OverFashion]

Appreciate your comment! Thanks for watching!

[@michaelobrien8219]

thanks for this talk - very frank, brave, honest and incredibly important

[@40OverFashion]

Much appreciated! Thanks for watching!

[@shaunleonard3878]

Thank you for sharing this message!

[@40OverFashion]

My pleasure!

[@russellekins2799]

Thank you for bringing this topic to us men, it's so so important

[@40OverFashion]

Absolutely!

[@Pete.C]

Thanks for the talking about this sensitive topic. I still cannot believe that we lost Robin Williams to this and because I am a golfer too, I was shaken by the news of Grayson's passing. :(

[@40OverFashion]

Thanks Pete!

[@darrenbeachy4567]

Thank you, John, for the important message in this video! I wished that you would have said the same thing about the COVID pandemic that, according to the CDC, killed more men than women in the US. Again, thank you for speaking out on this important subject for us men!

[@petewilliamson2609]

Good on you for addressing this

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you for watching!

[@matthewcormier8744]

Very informative Good people helping good people

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you!

[@leroyyoder3494]

Great video, sometimes hard things need to be said. Legend!

[@TimHunold]

I have a nightly call at 6pm with a buddy, it's a combo work day debrief (hate to sound like an agile retro, but it is how we can communicate) and then we go into just things on our minds. It's 15 minutes, it's on a schedule, and something solid to look for every day. When the weekend comes, we shed it and go grab a bite, take a drive, or do something. In an uncertain world that both hates us and expects us to have all the answers and then do it all, we need to look out for our team. If it sounds rough, the next day we go get together and do something easy, just to break the cycle. Also any kind of hobby or artistic expression helps a lot too.

[@johnkremastos4239]

Good on you my friend,great video Watching this from Australia 🇦🇺 ❤

[@noName-kn1lx]

I have a 24/7 line to help. Its free its never busy, based on love and completely understands who i am and what im going through. Its prayer to God, there is no substitute on earth for it.

[@TechnoLawyer]

If that’s what keeps you grounded, focused, and positive, that’s awesome man. Glad you found it.

[@kelleyhudson3157]

Sir, we are the same age, and yes, I feel the same way. I am thankful for your ch and what I have learned about fashion from you.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you!

[@Mike----]

Needs to be said. Thanks.

[@Espectro1680]

im 43 .. and this year i found out i have adhd , cptsd and autism . never knew .. they just told me i was bipolar and that was that ..if i didnt heR the chief keef had Asperger i would never looked into what it was . when i seen the symptoms i would have never knew . and probably end like him . cause i was close .. but i went and got help . and good now

[@roverwells]

One of the best videos in the channel.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you!

[@bsumm1473]

Thanks John

[@40OverFashion]

My pleasure!

[@BornLoveandEnergy]

I want men to open up more. I had a bad experience with counselors, so I decided to just want to be one. Men should never feel just, because they are men they should be strong to not need help.

[@michaelbetz520]

I have been there. It seems like there is no hope.,but there is. Get with a good psychiatrist and then you can start tying different medications. Its a long horrible journey,but there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

[@salemslotandmore8278]

Thank You for the Video.

[@40OverFashion]

My pleasure!

[@salemslotandmore8278]

@@40OverFashion ✅

[@butcho7492]

Great vid, John.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you!

[@mgammeren]

Great video and great tips! Another tip however is watch people who are doing better and coming out of their depression episode. Statistics show that people who are in that stage are most likely to commit suicide. They have back some energy to go out and do something.

[@Bus-Stuff]

There's a part you are missing. For those who have severe chemical imbalances, whatever you want to call it. Bipolar, manic depression, etc. The hardest part, speaking from experience when you are way up and everything is just the best you could ever have. In your mind already you are trying to stabilize, and pretend even if it's the best thing you have ever done, that it's no big deal, I could have done better. Because being proud of yourself for one moment could cost you your life when the bottom drops out, and you are just left with who you are day to day, even if outsiders would consider you someone to look up to.

[@mhutters]

This is a very relevant subject and I can't believe it's been online for 6 hours and only has 2,234 views from 417k subscribers.

[@40OverFashion]

Yep. It’s tough.

[@whatsnext9657]

Thank you for sharing

[@paulrenis8930]

After I got help, I realized a real man gets help.

[@mgammeren]

Indeed, a real man should accept that sometimes you need help with something. Why is it ok to get help for physical stuff from a coach or a financial expert but not for the most important part you have: you're brain/thoughts.

[@40OverFashion]

Absolutely! Thanks for sharing!

[@Dev-qs2yb]

Men's Mental Health Month and they introduced Pride month in this month later, International Men's Day, and they introduced International Toilet Day on the same day. They are clearly sending some msg and it's not a good one.

[@paulbrowning1758]

Whatcha talkin' about, fool?

[@Dev-qs2yb]

@@paulbrowning1758 do some research.

[@noName-kn1lx]

All these “months “ are completely irrelevant

[@michaelbetz520]

Not a joking matter

[@mikereese15]

Great video

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you for watching!

[@CoachSteveJandS]

988 is free to call...

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you!

[@aquicktake]

i'm of the same Gen X as you, and to me today's generation is extremely weak and soft, and it just seems like it's getting worse and worse.

[@guyh.4553]

John, you're just a kid! (2 years younger than me 😅😅😅). The younger generation are soft! Ha ha ha. This video is one of the biggest reason why I follow you. This subject is something that is near and dear to my heart looking at it, and coming VERY CLOSE numerous times. As a Vet, these numbers are significantly greater than the ones you've presented us. My #1 saving is my 2 cats, but one is gone now. And I don't know how I'm going to react when its here time as it could come any day. Plus, I've been in counseling since 1995/96 with varied results. That said, keep on doing this work. It does help. Legend, out.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you for sharing! You matter, my friend!

[@jongurn00]

I totally get the thing with pets. My dog is 13. Know that even though we’re strangers I’m with you in this as well. We can do this.

[@BradleyON1]

A lot of people won't want to hear what I have to say

[@BradleyON1]

No f****** website or f****** 24-hour hotline would understand

[@BradleyON1]

Happy mens Mental Health Awareness month guys

[@noName-kn1lx]

@@BradleyON1pray He wants to hear it and completely understands

[@brunopaolucci6054]

My wife’s 2nd cousin just committed suicide. Do you think it’s the medication making them commit suicide or it happens also when they are not medicated?

[@mgammeren]

Sorry for you're loss. Depression is something does weird things to our brains. People who are depressed and suicidal are prone to commit suicide if they get better or get out of the lowest point in the episode. They have more energy and can bring themselves to go outside. Medication does effect symptoms and can because of that help for the person to feel better/ more energy and take their life. I have worked with people with depression and it does effect memories you can't remember happy memories you don't seem to enjoy stuff anymore, you just can't. Again I'm sorry for you're loss I know what it is to lose friends that way. Take care of yourself and talk to a professional if you need. Also take care of your family and see that they seek help if they need that. Above all talk with each other and well, take care in this dark time.

[@TuneinR]

It seems this thing is prevalent in first world countries.We africans are familiar with our daily third world struggles but not with mental issues because if that was the case....we may face extinction.We are happy with or without.

[@q-storm767]

800K people die by suicide every year? 😮🙁💔 That's incredible... but not in good way of course. You would think the US population would decrease each year because of that statistic but we're still over 300 million and I digress.😐😟 I have to say John, with the exception of the Olympics, when Men compete, there's no 2nd and 3rd place, only 1st. Men just kept competing and competing in life until they finally won or grew exhausted in the race of life. Questions are raised after a certain amount of time about one's worthiness and value in our Society. What's wrong with me? Why can't I come out a winner or better? Is there room in this world for a man with less to show or offer?Is it true that Nice Guys always finish last? A legendary R&B Singer once said "Only the Strong Survives" Mental Health pays a devastating price sometimes.

[@Pete.C]

800K people die every year globally.

[@alwayspooh1588]

Great video! We have snowflakes these days who get awards for just turning up! I am a child of the 80s, and we had role models who kicked ass, won things, bashed the commies, scored the winning shot, and were people we could look up to. Suicide is the most selfish thing anyone could ever do. I have told students who thought suicide was an option "imagine your mum crying at your funeral, then imagine her crying on your birthday, then crying every Christmas. Is that the life your want your mum to live"? Suicide is never an option, never. Sorry for your own loss John. Talking is key.

[@40OverFashion]

Thank you! Appreciate your comment!

[@jongurn00]

That’s not the way to deal with someone who’s thinking of suicide. I wish it was that easy. Not being a jerk, but please don’t ever tell someone who’s struggling that it’s the most selfish thing you could do. Thats a guaranteed way to make it worse. Also, please don’t say snowflake it’s so played out. It’s the equivalent of wearing socks and sandals.

[@alwayspooh1588]

@@jongurn00 I disagree with you on every point you made. Suicide is the most selfish thing a person can do if they claim they love their mum, dad and whichever relatives. Regarding the term 'snowflake' it is used to denote someone who has the structural (mental) fortitude of a transient snowflake. The term is not, as you say, played out. However, I do agree that socks should never be worn with sandals! Surely the socks defeat the point of wearing sandals!

[@jongurn00]

@@alwayspooh1588 it’s a guarantee that someone who uses the word snowflake will want to fight on the internet. Thats not me bro. I’ll just say I feel bad for anyone fighting depression that comes into contact with you. Selfish is thinking loving your parents will make it better.

[@alwayspooh1588]

@@jongurn00 I feel sorry for most people coming into contact with me! Amazing that during WW2 depression was unheard of, despite the horrors of war. Snowflake generation Z and millennials indeed.

[@robertotorres226]

Congrats great topic.

[@freepatriot9629]

My comment was deleted.. wth?

[@40OverFashion]

I just jumped on here. I haven’t deleted anything if you’re asking me. KZbin will sometimes do that if improper language is used or something along those lines.

[@peterreed9566]

Shit happens. Life shits on you. Men will continue to take their lives and nothing is going to change that. Sad but true.

[@fs1357]

Turkish subtitle, please 🌿

[@ismaelhall3990]

Only men will ever understand.

[@paulkoza8652]

I don't think you are in a position to be giving out professional mental help. A big problem is that it is so easy to kill ones self today and unfortunately death is permanent.

[@robertvanderzwan2517]

We want talk to reall persons not ai

[@freepatriot9629]

You can call 988 if you are struggling with thoughts of suicide or know someone who is.

[@DiegoB0525]

Good message. But putting/talking about a sponsor undermines the message, I think.

[@40OverFashion]

Good grief. The message is still the message regardless. I’m trying to help men be better men, and also earn a living. Just skip over the ad read if it bothers you that much. Appreciate your feedback as always, but I refuse to feel guilty about spreading positivity.

[@jongurn00]

Better help does seem like a good company and it absolutely fits with this message. Thank you, John.

[@user-vm9jv4lq2t]

Are you 56 then

[@sethemmit1627]

Better Help dosen't care about me or you. It's just someone's job, so they can keep living somewhat comfortably enough to manage. Life is tough for the majority of us and life is sad with just enough sweet sprinkles to keep us hopeful. Best of luck to anyone struggling