7 Things MEN Say That Are Huge RED FLAGS

[@MeetStephanSpeaks]

❤️ Get tickets to my “Time For A Change” tour and much more -> www.stephanspeaksshop.com/products/time-for-a-change-tour

[@JackieS812]

I will be at the Chicago tour next month. I’m excited!

[@gmilner84]

We ready for ATL!

[@SouthernGospelSinger777]

Everything is a red flag to most women these days 😒.

[@GreeneChakra]

Stephan what about “Silence” as a response to Serious Questions.

[@dannbatch1898]

I was getting to know a guy, we spoke only once on the phone and the rest was voice notes and text messages, he explained he has 3 kids, with the eldest being 14 who lived with him and from another relationship a 4,6 yr old now my thing is I appreciated him be open and honest but what I’ve released when I asked where his head was at he some how didn’t give me a straight answer, he spoke about boe having his freedom now that he lives alone etc, then he would skip to talking about how sexy he thinks I am 🙄 basically it felt to sway the conversation to something else, then in another conversation which I instigated he striaght away asked me to send a sexy selfie which put me right off, up this point he hadn’t even attempted to organise date so for me all this was a red flag, he also mentined that he has insecure and jealously issues which he explained he is in therapy.. okay great he was at what issues he has and was looking to resolve it but I can’t justify him concentrating on my looks and asking for sexy selfies

[@SharonElizabethWhitfield]

If a man refers to his exes as crazy, then he is either attracted to crazy women or he drove them crazy. Either way RUN!

[@yazajag]

Exactly!!

[@SouthernGospelSinger777]

No, not necessarily 😄. Many woman are crazy and it isn't the man's fault 😄.

[@SoSo-hh4pv]

Whew ,🤦🏽‍♀️ almost drove me crazy

[@AmbiLane998]

Projecting; He's the crazy one.

[@jeniferfuhrman1525]

He is the common denominator!

[@zairademexicoacanada3453]

As I'm dating men at the moment, I thought of a good follow-up question for when they say "I just got out of a long relationship", or "my ex was crazy". I ask them: " What did you learn about yourself after that relationship? The answer will usually give me enough information on whether he has good emotional inteligente, self awareness, take ownership of their own mistakes, and in general, potential or not. ❤

[@MeetStephanSpeaks]

Good suggestion 🙏

[@cherylrobinson7876]

Love this! Thabks for sharing that.

[@patriciajamison7771]

Agree I do the same thing

[@teeturner2798]

I can cosign on that crazy ex one. But after a long relationship, anyone needs time to heal. Nothing they say could negate that

[@laurenreavis8516]

Definitely. Take ownership…so incredibly important. Not gonna beat you over the head cuz you made a mistake, but the fact that you can admit that you made a mistake is huge to me!

[@marilynbradley8487]

The man who says my ex is crazy, is the one who drove her crazy

[@Banga33]

👏

[@tammyfitzgerald5336]

😂😂😂😂absolutely pay attention 😊

[@tammyfitzgerald5336]

🎉❤we not crazy we just walked away to heal because they extremely nuts pay attention ❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@bigtreecombatacademy2927]

Not necessarily I have 2 exes that are crazy as hell , the rest are normal

[@user-fh1tr9zp3l]

Two ex's were crazy and u saw it fit to entertain them Then you were on a crazy exploration 😅

[@odessapalms6415]

Men who are “emotionally immature” and have not healed from past relationship damage, can be just as crazy as the women they claim are😊

[@lisadelgado228]

Amen

[@Banga33]

👏👏👏☝️

[@cindyvazquez4333]

@@odessapalms6415 100 percent

[@andziagreen4922]

True

[@mariangrimsdell1112]

A man child creating drama is always looking for a Mommy substitute or a Nurse with a purse 😂, and they will never see you as an equal partner , no matter what contribution you bring to the table, they will dismiss and devalue your contribution. These are Universal Truths across all cultures and all societies.

[@VmakesItEasy]

Healing from a situationship hurts worst than a actual relationship. Babe when he says he don’t want nothing serious, don’t try to change his mind leave him right there. Trust me.

[@KBdatruthseeka]

Ummmmmmm….i don’t know if it hurts worse👀 but it best to leave in any situation when someone shows you that they aren’t serious

[@saynotohookups]

I agree but I don't know if it would hurt more than a real relationship.

[@glamourgirl-n9b]

Unless you don’t want a relationship either, I say leave too.

[@hinepart]

Yes, it does

[@robinrobinson2354]

I agree

[@hollyandstelladoodle8748]

I am a calm stoic secure woman. My soon to be ex recently called me crazy and said I have anger issues because I expressed true anger. For the first time in our 10 year relationship. He called his last ex wife crazy and said she has anger issues. I see now that he is the problem.

[@walkaminutewithme4787]

We are all referred to as crazy when there called out. 🙏🏼❤ There just words to hurt us

[@Momlifeof04]

Wow.. got me thinking

[@DHARK1873]

Wait, you’re a STOIC but dating a man with an ex-wife!? 😂

[@deityselah]

Im currently going through

[@casseychaaneel_]

Preach sister!!

[@cindyvazquez4333]

People need healing before they jump into another situation/relationship. I believe God can heal you from that person that he never had for you in the first place. God gives me peace in my life today. ❤❤🙏🙏

[@AmericanDreamer]

big amen to this!!! Do you pray to Him for healing? How do you do it?

[@jasminemercier1998]

🙏🏾

[@cindyvazquez4333]

@@AmericanDreamer yes you just ask God to heal your heart, your mind, your soul from the trauma of the relationship. Thats how I found peace within myself!

[@Banga33]

👏👏

[@ladywithclasscarpenter1143]

⁠@@AmericanDreamerYes we should Pray for that person because they need healing from their past hurt; hurt people hurt other people; no one can have the relationship God intended for them until he or she is completely healed and whole🙏🏽🙏🏽

[@Laila_Voice_AsMR]

Ladies when a man tells you I don’t want to hurt you ? ☝🏾 run like there is Fayah on d mountain ⛰️ 🏃 🔥🔥🔥

[@just-j-2023]

On the mountain...run like that fire is five steps behind you. 😂

[@abitofgenevieve]

😂😂😂😂

[@heide-raquelfuss5580]

Very true! This men allways WIL HURT you. Another one... ' trust me' kind of sentence... They all where conning you! Run. Run. Run.

[@serahnuru5913]

😂

[@nurseexecinnovations]

FACTS!!!!

[@kaheaisaac1]

Yess I told a guy I wanted a provider who is Christian,kind and faithful . He asked what I bring to the table. I said I bring another man who won't ask that silly question. That was the second time I was asked that question so I had answer ready lol.

[@roses4me451]

A clown 🤡asked me that question. I told him: "I know what I bring to the table, because I AM THE TABLE. Therefore, I'm not afraid to eat alone!" He was outdone with me. Pay close attention ladies. It's all about what YOU have that he can "BENEFIT" from. Men never talk about what they will DO for the woman, how they will PROVIDE and PROTECT her. BM always want to get the MOST, by doing the LEAST. He NEVER wants to be held responsible or accountable for anything! It is so important that a woman has her own BAG, is financially stable, and DO NOT "need" or depend on a man for anything! (Thank me later)

[@danicaharley6273]

​@@roses4me451 We're not meant to try impress a guy. He's meant to impress us and show us what he's offering

[@Unaminousverdict]

Go girl !!! Let these men know you are not to played with I love this

[@luluxxx3994]

I'm gonna use your answer from now on 😂

[@NthQldGirl]

​@@danicaharley6273 this💯

[@djmandyland]

I had a "man of God" who preached how strong of a follower of Jesus he is.... yet he started talking sexually to me not even two weeks in, told ME I must have a spirit of lust attached to me that's making him do that and to top it off he insinuated he wanted me so badly that he would take advantage of me in my sleep if need be. I told him that is vile and I felt extremely creeped out by him at that point, to which he freaked out at me for making it seem like he would "be that type of guy" and that I should know better that he would never do something like that 🤨 he also talked down to me a lot claiming his anointing was higher than mine and that's why God has a shield of protection around him. I was just like ok bud, I'm gonna go now. Then he called me dramatic lol. Christian narcissists are a trip. Holy Spirit definitely helped me see RIGHT through that. Side note - Him trying to speak in tongues was always him starting with the same exact phrase lol I always tried not to laugh because it was so obviously a show he was putting on instead of actually connecting with the Holy Spirit. So defiantly look out for that, if there speaking in tongues always starts the exact same, they are a fraud.

[@Anonymous_Me591]

I've experienced someone like this. A hypocrite is what they are.

[@stacks3459]

Sounds like a guy I came across... mental illness is real. And narcissistic is a personality/ illness that is okay to run from asap! There's no pill for that at the moment. Also that's not a real man of God as in the God of Moses, Abraham, Job , Jesus christ of Nazareth. There's demons out there that present themselves as Lord or God. I only took the time to say this that without guidance some people think all or even most Christians or even other religious branches are wicked. Those type are wicked because of their choices not because of the real living God. I'm glad you made it out There's many people that fall in their trap. I barely got out myself tbh.😅

[@msdemeanour]

Ugh...what a total parasite this guy is ...man of god 😂

[@BrokeTruckerGyal]

You avoided calamity. Good on you!

[@lisavice7253]

🥹 o my dear Lord. I'm so happy that you didn't lose faith in Jesus because I have so many girlfriends that have after meeting preaching demons at church. May your guidance from the Hollty Spirit continue to keep you covered in these single streets. Amen!. Block him he's going to circle back around. Hopefully he doesn't know your family and friends, places you like to frequent and your address....

[@nellesor25]

If a man told me he just got out of a long term relationship i'm gonna reply, 'then you should be chilling now, not trying to date right away'. 😂

[@BL3SSed-Bliss]

Right. Of course, you know they just want sex. I know hormones can be a b*tch, but I pity those with no self-control.

[@glamourgirl-n9b]

A guy I know said that and so did I. We were in the same situation & years later we both realize, that’s why the relationship didn’t work.

[@ZendelAtkinson]

Perfect marriages or relationships aren't real; they're all different. What works for one person might not work for someone else. But I've come to understand that there's always a solution to problems. Five years ago, my wife and I were close to divorcing because of issues in our marriage, but we found a way to fix them. It was tough, but we survived.

[@SERIKAmrabat]

I genuinely want to be happy as well. I'm in a relationship, and even though we're apart, I can't think of life without her; my love for her is solid. I really want her back, and I'm committed to making it work. We've tried different things, like therapy, to mend things.

[@ZendelAtkinson]

Saying farewell to someone you love dearly is never easy, but in my case, I had the assistance of a spiritual counselor who saved my marriage from falling apart. Her name is Suzanne Ann Walters.

[@SERIKAmrabat]

Thank you for this advice. I'll promptly start searching for her online. I appreciate it. I'm optimistic that pursuing this approach will also lead to favorable outcomes for me; her absence weighs heavily on me.

[@ZendelAtkinson]

You should

[@sd04swa]

​@@SERIKAmrabat 😮

[@LisaLee__]

"im a good person" unprompted has proven to be a red flag phrase. Idk who needs this but if you get a gut feeling with this or any if these red flags, figure it out and just leave before it gets any deeper. Do not waste your youth trying to change a man or get him to do this or that babes. If he wanted to, he would.

[@casseychaaneel_]

Very true!!

[@theoutlawblonde]

Or asking if you’re a “good woman” or knocks on your character if he feels rejected

[@Jules-t9m]

I’ve just been told 7 months in he wants to go with the flow and some laughs bc he’s taking his time in making up his mind whether he wants to have a relationship with me or not 🙄I made it easy for him- just told him to Flow Off 😂😂😂

[@roses4me451]

Translation: "I only want to USE you for s3x and your resources. I DO NOT want to be held accountable or responsible for anything, and I DO NOT want to, or will be spending any money, or developing a relationship with you." RUN!!! 🏃‍♀

[@rroman6405]

Good for you.

[@annabelsogbesan1114]

😂😂😂😂😂 love the come back.

[@coreejacobs4780]

A man told me he wanted to go with the flow and see what happens, few months in I asked again he wasn’t ready for a relationship another 2-3 months he had a relationship, with someone else. Although I like to give people the benefit of the doubt and not nag, this was my fault I knew better

[@leeannballard6996]

@coreejacobs Good for you ~ so many Covert Narcissists out there Some are slick

[@Resilientqueen-c1b]

A man who calls a woman crazy is because he meets his match a woman who will stand up for herself and not take his crop.

[@Krystle-y2v]

Yes 🙌

[@Nike-jz3oi]

Anyone who says their ex is crazy, regardless of the ex’s behavior, is a red flag - because it is simply not a mature way to describe a person. Even if there were legit issues of that nature, a healthy individual will approach it with respect in the language they use.

[@tammyfitzgerald5336]

🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

[@BM-7888]

Excellent Definition⭐️

[@paintedrose846]

The RED FLAG was his lack of communication After 7 months in he tells me he has a 1 year old. 8 months in I found out he was married (“separated”) with an incredibly physically abusive covert narcissist wifey who “doesn’t care if he is dating me.” Guess who is stuck examining her own codependency realizing I can’t save him and his secrets were hiding knives that would end up in my back… Trust your intuition- figuring out the story is not worth your stress or your time

[@mysteriousqueen935]

How do you know she’s a narcissist? Sounds like he’s the narcissist

[@paintedrose846]

@@mysteriousqueen935 she called me on the phone the last time she held him hostage. She claimed that she just wanted him to stay there with the kids so she could go meet men, but she brutalized him instead. She broke his nose. I made him go to the hospital and the hospital told him to go to the police. Ran background checks on everyone I know he knows- his BM’s background check shows battery, domestic violence and child endangerment on her police report and when she met him (he was 18) she was a 26 year old nanny in the neighborhood who triangulated him against the 16 year old who she was already dating- convinced him to go to the courthouse alone with her and get married- told him he would lose access to the kids if he leaves… Long story short- I cannot abandon someone simply for revealing themselves- I am here to bare witness. He is flawed and he has to heal but he always comes in with effort. I know that I probably won’t see the fully healed version of him but I can hold space through a long distance relationship. I’m still growing and learning myself but my boundaries are firmly established - I am simply trying to understand “what about me attracted this kind of partner?” Until I know similar situations will repeat in other relationships until I heal from within. But I should have trusted my gut and thrown bigger fits for half ass responses. His communication skills have improved as he faces losing me. But I love knowing he is racing towards divorce whether I stay or go so I am the catalyst- not the factor. Violence is a non negotiable in all of my relationships (unless it is consensual bed play.)

[@paintedrose846]

@@mysteriousqueen935 she told me she doesn’t want him she just “doesn’t like change” but she’s happy that “he’s found a woman like you.” It feels like a weird game. She’s not happy that he’s filed for divorce and I’m not happy because he’s already lost me.

[@krisluck4541]

I became a widow last year. I had no idea how things have changed in the dating world. I met my husband at the University gas station, and we were inseparable until he took his last breath. Thanks for the info. I'm not in the dating pool, but even at the age of 50, I need to be on top of stuff like this if I choose to put myself out there.

[@tsams4048]

I will be 🙏 for you and I understand where your coming from I became a widow three years ago this month . 🙏 and trust the Lord He knows when your ready and brings healing through the process ❤

[@krisluck4541]

@@tsams4048 Thank you ❤️

[@deborahcarter904]

It's tough

[@sandramullen7804]

I'm a widow too and I tell you it's a cesspit out there ( in my experience ) barrier up and heart locked .never again. I feel so sorry for the younger generation of girls/women out there trying to find a LIFE PARTNER . God help them .

[@vernettabharvey5171]

You are a wise person!

[@sparkle3000]

Most people today are really looking to hook up, they should be honest about that upfront. You can tell in the first three dates.

[@mimiaquariusharris6244]

Honey I’m 70 years old and men some women have been just trying to do a hookup, booty call since I was a teenager. Nothing new just different times.

[@melanieboccinfuso5619]

Exactly!! No one wants a relationship anymore. People are too self involved.

[@SalomejaSaulyte]

"What do you bring to the table?" Is actually a must question to be asked by a woman or a woman's father.

[@beaj.h.1017]

very good!

[@alomaalber6514]

right now with the economic downturn there are lots of men of all ages and background that are not working. The white guys too. The new term is funny but helpful the HOBO sexual, they are straight men with no money who want to live in a ladies paid up apartment!

[@amberberrlessons6900]

God Must Be Our Solid Foundation! Both Parties!!!

[@MeetStephanSpeaks]

🙏

[@jasminemercier1998]

Amén 🙏🏾

[@SofiUk0319]

Exactly, cannot force love ❤

[@theoutlawblonde]

It’s a red flag if a man tells me what beliefs to have. The biggest. Controlling

[@roses4me451]

@@theoutlawblonde Anytime you see a man who is "very religious" and every other word out of his mouth is: "God told me", "I am the HEAD of the household", "A woman is supposed to SUBMIT", "Jeezus said", RUN as fast as you can! 🏃‍♀ He will always use religion and the bible to validate his abusive behavior.

[@Robin-z8h]

Only dead fish go with the flow...

[@qweej9890]

Exactly

[@joangordon8225]

Lol! Facts!

[@Nutbelly123]

Thank you 🙏 I’m healing from an 8 year relationship that was going no where. I told myself that I’m taking 2024 to get to know myself. Single mama of two beautiful boys. It becomes less painful with time. I don’t even know how to date someone right now 😂 hopefully I’ll get my confidence back till then I’ll run my restaurant and spend more time with my sons. My employees are like my family as well. Dating world is awkward

[@roses4me451]

1. Watch this video: "7 reasons why women must put time limits on new relationships." by R.C. Blakes. 2. Get his book: "41 Shades of men: The pursuit to subdue and use you." by Princella Clark. (This book is pure FIRE!!! 🔥🔥🔥 READ!! You will will NEVER be played again. (Thank me later) 3. "NEVER do wife duties at girlfriend prices!" (Judge Lynn Toler: "Divorce Court) 4. "Ladies, a man knows within FOUR MONTHS if you're the one or not. It don't take us that long! Men are simple. Men go HARD for what they want. If he is not chasing and pursuing you; You are NOT what he wants!" (Steve Harvey) 5. A farmer will NEVER buy a cow that he can get FREE milk from. You must know your worth!! When you live with a man who is not your husband, he DOES NOT respect you! You are giving him ALL the "BENEFITS" of a husband, without him making you a WIFE! He does NOT value you, because you didn't value yourself.😟 You are nothing more than a glorified "place holder" who is washing, cooking, cleaning, and giving him s3x when he wants. 😳He hasn't given you a ring and set a wedding date, because he DOES NOT see you as "marriage material" regardless of the "lies & excuses" he tells you. He is keeping his "options" open while seeing other women. Trust & believe, when his "dream girl" finally comes along, he will DROP you like a bad habit, and MARRY her within 6 months! Now you have WASTED years of your time you can't get back, and is now left with a "sore womb, broken heart, empty palm, holding a bag of AIR!!

[@mamaga1afua16]

What I bring to the table is Me. Take it or leave it.

[@heather7119]

I like that!

[@AmericanDreamer]

exactly!!!! 💯

[@lilbel73m.86]

Lol... I was asked that and I told him, "I am the table" 😊

[@mamaga1afua16]

@@lilbel73m.86 that’s right

[@FrancesHernandez-hf5ys]

💯exactly

[@Unaminousverdict]

The best feeling was ghosting my situationship while I’ve moved on he still reaches out and I never respond I hope he gets well soon

[@wynekapowell6288]

I thought men supposed to lead, support, and defend. So what I’m actually bringing to this table. Please get rid of that table mess lol

[@sw1452]

I met a man that hit some roadblocks about a month in seeing each other. After trying to support him for about 8 months I told him that he needs to figure himself out and deal with his problems. That I needed to disconnect myself for my own mental health. He married another woman (that he knew before me) about a year later. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I’m single-single for 4 years now and never felt more at peace.

[@mariereeder3635]

Don't worry. He giving her pure hell.

[@jocelynedge6037]

"What do you bring to the table?",.. Sounds like a working meeting at the office . I'm out.

[@enaalexis92]

Your story reminds me of Job, the devil was allowed to take everything but your life but God restored everything you lost ten-fold 😊🙏🏽❤

[@ela-sandcat]

Job was a man... men's lives can recover... women are usually left with kids and have a much harder ti.e starting over...if she doesn't have good looks, NOTHING will be restored in THIS lifetime...many men can start over and prosper...most women if they loose spouse or family...end up alone and poor.

[@recyclingrevolution4905]

“If I am still available “ when I learned to say that, I feel much better.

[@aprilcummings5933]

I wish I heard this over a year ago!!! And recently, I've met men who don't take accountability, expect the other person to "fix" their issues, and only talk in general terms to not commit to anything. Its exhausting. Where are those who's serious in finding their person?

[@roses4me451]

That's their game. BM come to the BW and want to receive everything from her, by doing the LEAST or nothing at all. Becky requires a BAG before she even gets involved with a BM. I told one: "Go down to the Mercedes dealership, and tell them you want a new car. 🚘 Tell the dealer you want to drive it off the lot and use it; but you DON'T want to fill out an application, have them run your credit report, check your employment, put down a deposit, or verify any of your information; and SEE what they tell you! 🤡🚔

[@gabj4665]

As I was getting to know a guy that I just met, I asked him questions to get to know him better and some of the things he said to me I’m the only woman that has ever made him feel this way and that he’s never told a lie in his life……😳😳😳😳…..🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

[@sandrarenner4402]

Run

[@judyplatz2885]

Hahaha! RUN! 😂

[@BrandyHoffart-wp6cn]

Omg😂 my boyfriend told me the exact thing....literally word for word total liar

[@lisavice7253]

I leave immediately when a man says he just got out of a serious relationship and he just broke up. I don't know any Brotha's WILLING to go to counseling. Anytime one attempts to come back and think he can talk me into getting back in a relationship, I finish him off😂😂 with, " lets go to counseling or the only way I consider it is with professional help"💥 he is out my face. 😂

[@MerriamMungia-mi7rc]

Girl!!! I love this!!! It's so damn true! Ain't it!! Lol 😂

[@xino_z]

lol i'll go out with u with professional help😂😂

[@jillianshuler4168]

I agree prenup is good, especially if you already own your home and you have things to lose and you’re much older in life I’m saying this as a woman who’s never been married and I’m 45😂

[@cdosby43]

I'm 57 and have never been married. I've got my own house, cars, etc. and would definitely want a prenup if I ever get married.

[@sammy4634]

@@cdosby43if you are in your 50’s everything you own before the marriage will always be yours. You only have to split objects that you acquired after the marriage (including finance). However, if you were already retired, you don’t have to split retirement money you acquired or will receive. If you are with a husband or wife for 10 years before you retire, then you will be responsible for giving him or her a portion of that 10 years of retirement income after divorce; but only if your significant other makes less than you and vice a versa.

[@bellydancerabiar7809]

Reading the Bible will cure addictions and diseases. One chapter takes less than 5 minutes. Jesus Christ wants a personal relationship with each of us. ✝️❤️

[@kayabe856]

Pls stop using religion to fix everything. It’s not a cure for everything.

[@mcleo9935]

@bellydancerabiar7809,so true

[@MerriamMungia-mi7rc]

Beautifully said!!! And so very true!!! Keep ur eyes on God and CLING onto him with all ur mind, heart, spirit and soul!!!

[@jeanninewright412]

Before answering this question of “what’s being brought to the table” we need to investigate if it’s appropriate enough table to even pull up a seat to let alone contribute! Vagueness is a veil/cloaking of ones self, or intentions, typically these folks operate as one sided, and you’re so right about the “my ex was crazy”shenanigans… it’s typically the person projecting outward who they are avoiding personal response- ability! To help me have better understanding of what someone says. I typically turned the conversation around in my head then go from there! Byron Katie is a good read for this technique!

[@doreenhenn1969]

My ex said his ex's were crazy. I now know he was the reason he drove them to crazy. I dumped him and moved on.

[@BMahinalaniM808]

10yrs off & on with my son's dad & 10yrs off & on with my last ex. I think single is where I belong 🙏

[@magalieatilus4152]

The I just got out of a relationship is a red flag that I would walk away from. If I met a guy and he said that he just got out of a long relationship about 2-3 months ago, he is not ready to date. I would NOT set myself up like that. He can work on himself and if I’m available when he is healed, then we could date.

[@just-j-2023]

I love and appreciate your posts. The more I've watched and self reflect... I've discovered I don't want a relationship. I'm good being a single woman and just focusing on myself, my family, and my career. It's funny how other people have a harder time accepting that fact than I do. I've had people say I'm being antisocial and I no longer bother explaining there's a difference between being antisocial and socially selective. Keep making your posts and counseling so many people need this knowledge. ❤

[@rubyZd-c9c]

This is so true., I'm just not interested in a relationship . I enjoy my time myself..too much energy wasted

[@Hood_Scriptures]

Yes I totally get it, I’m socially selective as well …some don’t even know the real definition to Antisocial, but they throw the word around 🤦🏾‍♀️

[@helenward77]

The quote in the beginning is more true than many know. I went from being a "runner" to a "lagger". Working on settling into the sweet spot of the middle.

[@MeetStephanSpeaks]

Thanks for sharing 🙏

[@user-fh7kf1qb9d]

Dating is so sad nowadays. I was seeing this guy and he treated me nothing more than hit me up. Call communication don't even text or call. I finally walked away.

[@JeanR525]

You’re so right. Three years here 🤦🏻‍♀️on and off from a situationship. My first and I pray my last 🙏🏻 It’s so important to be on the same path. The attachment part is real and difficult to detach. Hard lesson I want more then let’s go with the flow and false promises.

[@chocolatepuff718]

Had to get a restraining order on dude after he wouldn't leave me alone and guilted me for having boundaries. The relationship was only 6 months. After he put his hands on me in the end, he tried to make it seem like I was at fault. He's on house arrest now facing 3 charges. The only issue is, he has an online presence for his business, but I exposed the footage since he is the "perfect" man. After it all ended, I looked him up and saw he had a restraining filed against him prior and and a divorce

[@roses4me451]

I've said this a MILLION times, and I wish ladies would just LISTEN! When you meet a man, ALWAYS run a FULL BACKGROUND CHECK on him!!!🧐This way, you know all his LIES upfront and do not allow him to waste your time!! (Never tell them you ran a check on them. Quietly leave, block & delete) DO NOT have s3x with him, DO NOT move him in your place, and DO NOT believe anything he tells you!! A woman ran a check on a man she moved in her place. She found out later, he was a FELON who had a MURDER charge on his record! 👀He because FURIOUS 🤬with her!

[@loyaldior2950]

Is his name Marcell

[@casperinsight3524]

What you overlook today comes back to bite you back sooner or later 💥

[@MeetStephanSpeaks]

Better believe it

[@Keke-vs7gm]

Hell, I had a guy who was interested in me say to me that he asks females now what can you do for me that I can't do for myself. He claims he Was always the one doing in the relationship. Now that I decided to give him a chance, I now realized that was a manipulation tatic for a woman to do for him, so his saying is equivalent to what can you bring to the table?

[@shamekahughes]

My thing with that statement. How is that fair to you? Because he made the choice to do for thos3 women. Sounds like he chose you for that reason alone to show off that he's a princess too😂 Be a man, provide and protect. That's all they have to do. It's not that hard for them. 😊

[@susan5048]

If a man said to me he just got out of a relationship, the. I would tell him he shouldn’t be dating now.

[@greeneggslamb9336]

I will never ever give consideration to a man who would dare ask me what I bring to "the table." What table? Where's the table?

[@xino_z]

here it is

[@i.tsunami4258]

Like attracts like if he is a red flag, you are a red flag. Nothing to upset about. You are meant to learn and grow from all the wisdom you gain.

[@heide-raquelfuss5580]

Dangerous to say... So pedophiles seeck and are attracted towards children, so children are alike? A predator seeks prey. Is the prey alike the predator? A rapist and sexual offender is attracted to a woman, so she is a sex offender and also a rapist?

[@User-q5g3v]

Usually man are aware these are red flags as well and hid it under the table they do not bring it to the table 😂

[@xino_z]

😂😂😂😂

[@darialevina8973]

OMG, this is so on point! My ex boyfriend was telling me stories how his exes acted up crazy with him. Long story short, I also was acting crazy when I was with him. For example, I have run away from 4 seasons hotel when we were on the trip. Headed straight in red night! Never ever in my entire life I have acted this way. Hope never again as well. Now it is 4 months he is trying to get me back with gifts for me and my kids. And guess what - I am now also labeled crazy for not wanting him back 😅

[@mariereeder3635]

He probably a warlock. He is definitely demonic!

[@maryyoung4046]

oh boy🙄

[@humaneleaguelancPA]

Really good advice, thank you! I was with someone for 10yrs. and I heard a few of these phrases. I broke it off and he persuaded me to come back. I just told him a week ago, it's not working out and of course he is in denial, and says I can't talk about this right now. This is it for me, he has his house, I have mine, he lives 40 min, from me so, I'm getting to old for this lifestyle. I want a team player, I'm active, he's not. Is he a good guy, sure and everyone loves him at his job, but he is exhausted, doesn't have time, we are just not on the same page anymore. Thanks again for your video's.

[@PickleSammich-nd7pv]

If we’re not ready for each other now it ain’t never gonna happen. I’ve been strung along so many times and realized I was just back up. Never again.

[@rhythmnblues9195]

When you bring up what you think of infidelity or maybe he confided in you that he was cheated on in a past relationship and he says, “Everybody cheats.” Run.

[@yazz-k4m]

🎯You are exactly right and I attest that it is one hundred percent true. Now I do not ignore 🚩🚩🚩🚩the red flags, whether in supposedly loving relationships 💩🤣friends or co-workers, anyone cheats on you. Do not ignore your red flags, it is your conscience that is warning you

[@mcleo9935]

The longer we as women tolerate the B.S.is the longer it takes to get out of the situation

[@tammyfitzgerald5336]

Act crazy escape 😂😂😂😂😂🎉🎉🎉

[@MaggieAustin-tl9hg]

I’m seeing someone for two months who said “let’s just enjoy each other’s company for as long as we can”. At the moment I’m ok with this because I wasn’t intending on dating anyone over the summer. One thing is for sure, if we’re still seeing each other in four months the conversation of committed relationship will happen and I’m prepared to walk away if he’s not willing to make that commitment.

[@roses4me451]

Tell him that you are "celibate" until marriage. Watch him run like a roach 🪳who's been sprayed with a can of RAID!! ("Let's just ENJOY each other's company for as LONG as we can." He just told you he doesn't want anything from you but s3x! NEVER fall for this old player's line. RUN!! )

[@tashamack8701]

Thanks for dropping your gem today!!! Now I know what to look for once I decide to date. All your videos have really opened up my eyes. I stand on business and I don't play no games!!! I appreciate you Stephan!!!!

[@MeetStephanSpeaks]

You are so welcome! 🙏

[@alenahickman7573]

I was dating a guy who said that men lose in a marriage and men get the shorter end of the stick. However, this man also said that he wanted to be married 🧐

[@nathalian.7209]

did you ask him why he wants to get married if he thinks men lose?

[@alenahickman7573]

@@nathalian.7209 I did and he said he wanted the companionship and structure that marriage provides. He was divorced and he seemed to harbor some lingering bitterness and resentment.

[@ebonyg9632]

So basically he wants to be married to a friends with benefits situationship of a shell of a marriage & not a legitimate, respectful honest, loyal, loving, trustworthy marriage to his would-be wife , etc ..

[@alenahickman7573]

@@ebonyg9632 based on his conversation, that would probably be his ideal setup. Glad God saved me from that potential disaster 🙏🏾

[@matheussanthiago9685]

​@@alenahickman7573 he wants the benefits but not the responsibilities Got it

[@delnitap]

Even if the ex was actually crazy he enabled the behavior by staying and he liked something of that sort of behavior.. so it really is a red flag..

[@Laoriginal718]

Facts

[@AmericanDreamer]

or - most likely - he triggered her to the get to that level and then turned around to point the finger at her!!! Typically this is how men love to do it, so they can paint themselves white and fluffy and women - evil and crazy and whatnot!

[@PricelessJesus]

NOT true. Some cannot escape 😢

[@angelamuhindi6880]

Some of tge red flags come in later when one is alresdy emotionally connected and it takes time to break off!

[@mikbella1]

​@PricelessJesus not true.....anyone as a man can escape plus there's always the police if need be!

[@marilynbradley8487]

If a man just got out of a long-term relationship, It's not over. It's not over for him, and it's not over for the other person. The last time I fell for that one, he wanted me to wear his ex's same perfume fragrance.

[@VmakesItEasy]

Man that’s wild

[@Towanda-xq2xg]

Good day young man, hope all is, I know you are doing what you do best, helping those who don't know or have the COURAGE to check themselves, stop running after people who don't want them, being needy, people have so much work to do, including myself, I don't play games, being more mature and FIRST time on you, SECOND time shame on me and the THIRD time is a dam shame, I stop before things get to that point, smiling, wishing them well, walk away with ease and grace! Keep up the amazing work and let's go! 👊👊👊👊👊👊👊👊

[@coritellastory]

Con men dont disclose where they really are. They lie, front, or deny. How do you test out a con man? (because i know im not the only one who's been duped.)

[@shamekahughes]

Listen to them more until you hear the con

[@roses4me451]

Learn to judge a man by his "ACTIONS", and you'll never be fooled by his words. Today, they are looking for what YOU have that they can "BENEFIT" from. There is NO love, monogamy, commitment, or marriage in their game. This economy has them all "future faking" for a place to live, food, money, and a car to drive. Protect yourself by hiring a private investigator and letting them run a FULL background check on these "hobos3xuals", 🤡so you'll know all their LIES up front, and not allow them to waste your time! Many are dangerous FELONS who have committed extensive crimes, and have jail/prison records they will NEVER tell you about.

[@mariereeder3635]

​@@shamekahughesYes, they always slip and we have to pay attention

[@KittyQueenMeow]

Time. Don’t rush into the relationship. His actions must match his words.

[@coritellastory]

@@KittyQueenMeow this...thank you

[@chefnic4763]

Someone's energy speaks to me before they do. I know you're a red flag from the jump...next!

[@MeetStephanSpeaks]

Energy can be very loud!

[@tumba2372]

Me to,am quick to no his not the one for me

[@AnitaLuvsPeaches]

Yellow looks wonderful on you! Saw you at the Tribe Retreat! Thanks for all you do!!! 🙏🏾❤️🙏🏾

[@tamarrahicks8122]

I met a man that was ultimately trying to gaslight me, mention he wanted a prenuptial agreement before we got married. I surprised him when I didn't argue and my response was that I'd have my auntie review it to ensure all things were fair. 😂 at this big old age, I have assets to protect for my child as well. Folk act crazy when the worker of the two Ds come around. Death/Divorce

[@ritad.franklin6372]

BECOME A FRIEND FIRST, THEN DECIDE IF YOU WOULD BE OPEN TO A DEEPER RELATIONSHIP. GIVE THE FRIENDSHIP AT LEAST THREE MONTHS. WOMEN WARM UP SLOWER THAN MEN WHEN IT COMES TO, " IS THIS SOMEONE I AM ABLE TO TRUST FOREVER WITH MY LIFE. "

[@smithcanada654]

You are right.I went to a relationship in a long distance ,the guy was miles away .At first I knew it will be difficult,I asked how it will be possible then he said oh people move all the time!I said I will not be able to move in 5 years.He said he will do it. Then he was the one who said “no “that he can’t do move bcse of family issue.But he was very nice to me!

[@cindyvazquez4333]

I love what you said sometimes you have to hit rock bottom to lean on God. 🙏🙏❤❤

[@MeetStephanSpeaks]

Amen 🙌

[@PricelessJesus]

Hi x my boyfriend feels we need 2 gel more before marriage x we've both been thru stuff in the past

[@heatherschaffer9406]

I am in a relationship with a man that was just friends with for 16 years. We, have been in a bf gf type relationship for about 6 months. I am 48 and he is 66yrs. old. He, is having prostrate issues and has a pace maker on his heart. However, I just wanted to fool around with him like just four play. He, said, " it's all about sex with you, you need to grow up!" I said, " you had sex with other women in the past did you tell them to grow up?" I just walked out of his house got into my car and left, after he went to his room to get his paperwork. He, called me asked me where I went I did not get back to him until he reached out to me about five times in 7 day period, so he can think about what he said to me.

[@tammyfitzgerald5336]

Run 🏃‍♀️

[@karenevans9152]

Am single.Staying single.No interest in the way most men are today…happy as the way I am me.Won’t waste any of my own tym, space or energy on the rubbish out there…

[@tlindsey1977]

I agree. I’m dating a guy now… if it don’t work out…I’m staying single and enjoying life. These dudes are becoming a liability and useless.

[@xino_z]

agree super negative male energy taken its toll

[@kimberleymcdonald9235]

Thank u SOOOOOOO much. I was a fool. Lessons learned. 🎉 ❤. I will follow my head, not my heart. It's treacherous.

[@denanikiawilliams]

Hey Labossiere this is so informative. I usually out of habit sometime speak "Lets go with the flow". You just made me realize how of an impact it could have on your dating relationship. It would be so heartbreaking getting dismissed because of a misunderstanding or not being clear🤦‍♀️. This is so good. Keep teaching us. We appreciate it💜❤💙.

[@MeetStephanSpeaks]

Glad it was helpful! 🙏

[@denanikiawilliams]

@@MeetStephanSpeaks 💜🙏

[@lorettaquartey1549]

Bunny I wouldn't figure out what it actually meant till he told me u shouldn't bring any expectations in. I was wondering why he was behaving weird and all until I finally realize he didn't want or plan to be in a relationship with me. It was just too painful

[@JStig12]

The new video Mondays from Stephan are one of my favorite events!

[@MeetStephanSpeaks]

Thank you, I truly appreciate that

[@Weareallfavored]

Tired of the foolishness. I’ve waited and prayed for his repentance and deliverance. I see what’s happening in the spirit and I’ve stood and prayed and trying to navigate the red flags. He refuses to correct - too much ego and pride. I have to choose myself and love myself to open the door for a man with green flag energy.

[@roxy7255]

Love the second one. I think after a long relationship a man says ‘I’m ok’ after six months yet can’t point out any healing/learning at all big red flag. Low on emotional intelligence.

[@GladysAjiri]

Thank you Stephan for changing my mindset on relationships, coming across ur channel is one of the best things that has ever happened to me in 2022.🎉

[@cytinachavis9157]

That's good! I like the part when you said sometimes the man needs to hit rock bottom and lean on God not the woman.

[@HeatherAlecia]

A friend of mine says ex is crazy to minimize what is really going on because she's abusive and manipulative. Crazy is a good one to watch out for because it can indicate more time needed for healing.

[@felixmom12]

Sometimes when they say the ex is crazy it’s really them or either the ex got tied of their bs and started speaking on it

[@maketh1]

I had a guy ask me that on our first date, he asked me what do you bring to the table? My reply was the table and the chairs. He also said yeah I’m looking to buy a house I have two kids I have custody of, and and I said great and he said he worked in HR for a big company.

[@roses4me451]

Translation of what he's really saying: "I'm BROKE, and looking for a babysitter, woman with good credit to go in on the new home, help pay bills, and a submissive s3x partner who will cook, wash & clean, and take care of all of us." It's a big NO!!!! RUN!!!!

[@loriannjennings8479]

I think the crazy ex is only crazy once she is the ex

[@AmericanDreamer]

ha! That could be true too! yes.

[@arianna6682]

Another thing don’t believe someone who says I Love you too fast! Big Big Red flag 🚩

[@lauraraneri4250]

I will never be in a relationship/situationship with no commitment for 1-10 years!!! 😲🙏

[@paulimoh6374]

Thank You Stephen ❤. Am a big fan. There are few relationship teacher with a balance message. Your messages are insightful and very balanced. Thank You.

[@deeparker22]

True!!! I Wish I would have acted on it once I confronted him and not hoped for Change.

[@jazzbeinme9710]

No Therapy, go with the flow👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽 ❤❤❤❤so true, for both, him or her

[@buttermuffin1196]

I have heard the comment "I just got out of a long relationship" so many times from guys who are on dating apps. They seem to go on dating apps just to see what's out there and not to seriously date. Then you meet them and hit it off and they say that they are ready to date again because they like you. But they're not. Three times I've given men the benefit of the doubt and it has come back to bite me, as they suddenly ghost you or break it off abruptly. Thankfully, it was never more than two or three months of wasted time. Run ladies, run, when you hear those words and don't believe that they are ready. They're not, they just didn't expect to meet someone wonderful like you and you Will Get Hurt.

[@lilithmed86555]

All the "ex" of my ex are crazy...Included me!😂

[@tinacraft303]

True story, that first issue is also the last issue

[@ms.carpenter365]

Stephan, thank you for your consistent support and wise deliverance of the content you share in regards to relationships. It is truly amazing how you can provide such spot on scenarios of situations occurring within relationships. Sometimes we must pursue the initiative to heal inwardly to avoid toxicity, understanding red flags and most importantly understanding how to love ourselves first. We can’t pour into someone else with what we’re not pouring into ourselves (self love, self respect, dignity etc) if we can’t identify these things within ourselves we hurt others. Thank you for using your platform to speak on so many important things affecting people in society today. God bless you 🙏🏾

[@Amy_Stanmore]

Mine said we can be friends when we reconnected a little while ago. We love each other always and forever. We known each for a long time. Then they were really vulnerable and now completely ghosted me. Double standards, no direction nor real commitment. Its an unhealthy attachment yes. The most painful feelings Ive ever felt.

[@karinesavard2016]

My ex impregnated another women "he had casual sex with" and forced her to get an abortion without accompanying her to the clinic or care for her wellbeing!! He boasted about his own fertility on top of all the misery he caused. 🙈😢

[@kaheaisaac1]

Horrible

[@heide-raquelfuss5580]

Just horrible. 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩 RUN from this type of men. Poor woman.😢😢 Just horrible. I know this type of men. They all seem to be produced in the same factory. Men as robots.

[@susancurrie9246]

Stephan you are so on point with information. ❤❤

[@MeetStephanSpeaks]

Thank you very much 🙂

[@writeousrhema]

What I bring to the table can only be discerned by a GROWN man.

[@gwadkarukera]

Ladies, please don't ask men about if there is a timeline. A man knows.

[@saynotohookups]

And why is a man looking for a relationship anyway if he knows that he has no time for one? It must be all about the sex.

[@StephanieChatman]

Yea i DON'T DEAL with men that can't be upfront Just Met a dude online And we hit it off well I ended up blocking him because he told me he was cheated on and she ran back to her ex so he TEXTING me EVERY minute like i am in some TYPE of boot camp like I AM THE ONE THAT CHEATED ON HIM my whole life I Have been Dealt with those TYPE of men even wanted me To do buinsess with him BUT I felt he was still dealing with his ex as far as sleeping wise He was Italian and she is Black female BUT I am like NAH something don't sound and or Feel right I am never scared of Things people do as far as mobs and mafias and stuff because i am aware of them and neither do they scare me but if a man can't tell me upfront and call me and video chat with me I don't want him Wanted kids and all but I thought he was a great guy just My INTUITION SAID YEA THIS SOME BS ! that is why I don't Really TRUST these men because I only want a man that CAN SAY HEY I AM INLOVE WITH you The way you. Are inlove with me or Just get Out my face is how I am if we as people are in our 40's. Younger and or older and cant keep it Real WHY would I even wanna get dressed up And Go anywhere so i JUST BE like NAH IM good 💯💯💯

[@yanamoore3028]

Lovely video, Stephan ❤ Bless you. I think us girls have to also get used to having honest and direct conversations with men earlier. Give you a funny story, message before I asked where we were going was full of kisses (xxx - I’m British, we do this). After me asking ‘Where is this going?’ no kisses, ‘…can’t see it becoming a relationship, but we can still grab coffee.’ All in 24 hours 😂

[@lorettaquartey1549]

That's crazy 😂

[@cynthiagomes2979]

I do not have any issues with a prenup or trust. I have a request to be added to the prenup. I'm not going to be left out in the cold because you cheated and I don't want you anymore. Infidelity is the only thing God says I can divorce him for. Bet everything you own, I will be divorcing!! ZERO TOLERANCE!!!❤🙏

[@cdosby43]

I totatlly agree!

[@MikoyCreator]

Just watching like a few seconds of this gave me a headache. Dating sounds complicated/difficult. STAY SINGLE FOLKS!! 👋