A Crap Guide to D&D [5th Edition] - Sorcerer

Joseph makes a dumb Dungeons and Dragons guide for dumb people
intro/outro music is original piece by JoCat
►Support me: www.patreon.com/user?u=9866256
►Twitch: / jocat
►Merch: www.redbubble.com/people/joca...
►Hit Point Press: hitpointpress.com?aff=4
►Twitter: / jocat105
►Stream VODs: / @jocatstreams958
►Website: www.jocat.net/
►Discord: / discord
Other music courtesy of Epidemic Sound: player.epidemicsound.com/

[@kingdonut8272]

I remember seeing a comment somewhere that was something like "I'm going to play a bard/draconic sorcerer hybrid, bard because my father was a bard and draconic sorcerer because my father was a bard."

[@synsastral2753]

Fucking glorious

[@mistamemewide]

…I actually did this. A Draconic Sorcerer/Glamour Bard, of which his Grandparents a long time ago helped a Silver Dragon and the said Silver dragon blessed their bloodline with draconic magic.

[@kevalyn8586]

Yes!

[@trevorburke8660]

Thats up there with "Who are you? How did you get in here?" "I'm a locksmith ... and ... I'm a locksmith."

[@funynonsence]

@@trevorburke8660 same energy as :what’s your name rank and intention. :…. Doctor, Doctor, fuun.

[@triknight7243]

2:42 Oh well, at least he found his roots.

[@XSniper74184]

That was terrible and you should be proud of yourself.

[@mesome777]

That was terrible and you should feel terrible

[@Carstuff111]

@@mesome777 Does that mean I should look terrible for laughing at all of this?

[@mr.zman8]

*big bang laugh track*

[@Chagogo]

*Ba-dum Tss.*

[@hotsauce1543]

Turns out “turn into a potted plant” is an actual wild magic effect in the official 5e wild magic surge table

[@ItsAlwaysOct]

I knew this because once I was in a dnd group and everytime our sorcerer roll for wild magic, the entire table would start chanting "POTTED PLANT! POTTED PLANT!" at her

[@uselessweeb6505]

Now this is why dnd is amazing

[@OneNerdyAce]

EnderKnight_03 | My character turned into a potted plant once. The table didn’t say anything about casting spells, so that was the legacy of the Magical Pot

[@Sam-oi1bb]

I'm starting my second character this saturday! Had to pick wild magic sorcerer for the lulz

[@Miss_Phoenix_56]

@@OneNerdyAce Actually it states you are incapacitated, which means you can't take actions or reactions.

[@thunderdrae7749]

Wizard: *Studies for Magical Abilities* Warlock: *Has an Eldritch Sugar Daddy* Sorcerer: *Has a Bard as a grandpa that actually managed to seduce the dragon they were fighting*

[@Apollo_G]

Lmao I have a tiefling warlock with draconic bloodline so I might be able to make that work

[@gilbertosilva1304]

@@Apollo_G So, you character came from a family of bards. So you are a Sorcerer Tiefling from a draconic lineage called Jorge Jamal Jameson.

[@eldritch.madness]

donkey from shrek be the OG bard

[@alpharius3661]

Ok I do understand the joke but really I think that the sorcerer has the hardest and most drawn out form of work compared to any other caster. They need self control, or they risk hurting everyone around them, where while other people have limits, sorcerers can’t just use their full power because it would most likely kill their friends and themselves. It’s a great story telling technique and I think that this is obvious when you look at sips, because he could give into his curse and become completely unbeatable and a demigod, but he keeps himself in check so that the people he cares about don’t get hurt. But when they do, he loses himself and forgets all his effort and control and lets his power go free to destroy, so no, they aren’t born talented, their born cursed with the need to work to keep everyone around them alive

[@alpharius3661]

@Taramafor Haikido alright I was more talking about PCs because there aren’t really any NPC sorcerers, and the players are usually the hero’s, so I was speaking from experience

[@carrieseymour5197]

The only appropriate reaction to rolling potted plant on the wild magic table is "oh no, not again", even if it's the first time it's happened to you.

[@ingridplata2411]

Nice reference

[@Xanman22512]

"And if we ever knew why the potted plant thought this, we would know a lot more about the universe than we do now."

[@internettevarolanadam]

At least you're not a poor soul named Agrajag which your only existence is to getting killed again and again.

[@nasreenmerchant5433]

Im 1k like

[@Pumpkin-man]

That or a whale trying to greet a planet from about 10 thousand feet up... If nobody understands the reference, let me say this; *42*

[@pedropohren]

1:58 all effects: Turning inside out Making a good live action Disney remake Explosive diarrhea Endless bombardment of eggs Eternal spooning Losing your pinky finger Graduating clown school Marrying the last flower you smelled Getting lost in the sauce Becoming Spiderman Exploding, then exploding again Turn into nothing but abs Tea tastes like candy Drown in puppies Swim through puppies Be adored as a puppy Remember fry’s puppy Ha got you bet you’re sad now I am too now, shit Beat dark souls Bring your OC’s to life Nail a drawing on first try Fail drawing on first try Fail to even pick up a pen Become a mascot of a fast food joint Become a one hit wonder Growing fur on your teeth Every inch of your skin breaks out Secrete soap out your pores Bleed milk Piss milk Turn all liquid in the area into milk None-stop casting Flaming nutt-shots Getting your life together Paying off the loan Take out six more loans Become a famous hobo Eat butterfly wings Gather all four limbs of the forbidden one Win free tickets to guam Go on a cruise with Tom Cruise Become one with the force Dabbing Growing three extra fingers but in random parts of your body Growing a tail made out of tongue material Running out of made-up effects for this joke 2:45 On the actual wheel at the end of the episode: Give up YT forever Become happy with own work All hair falls out Fireball right on top of self TURN INTO A POTTED PLANT Make Bard x Paladin mutual & canon Do crap guide to Smash Bros Finish all those commissions Actually play D&D with someone (EDIT: included 'becoming spiderman' which somehow escaped my sight as i wrote the initial list. Who would have thought? '-') As JoCat would say: 'And now you know all the made-up effects without having to endlessly play/pause the video. You're welcome.' *plays catchy ending tavern tune*

[@beholdnonsense5100]

Too late I already played and paused and played again to read them all

[@CrownofMischief]

well now i want a crap guide to smashbros

[@afancyhat4630]

Thank you kindly sir/ma’am. *Catchy ending tavern tune intensifies*

[@glitchwarrior7270]

Actually, "fireball right on top of self" is an actual effect of Wild Magic.

[@malgorzatakawken]

@@glitchwarrior7270 I'm pretty sure it is

[@ashopal5811]

Friend once got "Turn into a potted plant" and "Polymorph into a sheep" during the same combat

[@AegixDrakan]

Oh man, that's Ba-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-d luck. XD

[@Lyoko012345]

To bad it wasn’t a whale and a potted plant.

[@makaramuss]

Cleric:"huhhh..... not again"

[@ladybug6525]

....Potted sheep?

[@WolfDoggie]

So did he become that Whimsicott pokemon?

[@savvythedivineyethuggable7493]

Basically anyone: *mentions wild magic* Sips: "Now this looks like a job for me."

[@demongamingafk2216]

Fucking love it

[@syrusalder7795]

Who?

[@savvythedivineyethuggable7493]

It's a character made by Dingo Doodles.@@syrusalder7795

[@NbLumineIzHere]

@@syrusalder7795​​⁠ the monkey. hes from a rly good campaign called fools gold, his player is the youtuber dingo doodles

[@TwoToneShoes]

I figured, of all people, a bard player and lover would understand how important it is to bang magical super entities like dragons. Sorcerers are just the natural consequences of Bards.

[@purplenova7690]

That's the whole backstory of my Half-Dragon BloodHunter

[@Joryho]

Always lay the dragon instead of slaying it.

[@thatguynamedgabestyfy8348]

now it makes sense why they use charisma to cast spells

[@Eramiserasmus]

I always wondered what happened after that Bard's sleepathon through the Dragon Council during peace talks.

[@lilysnow2062]

But what if the dragon is a top.

[@uniscornia4290]

I love the reference to sips from dingo doodles

[@Aasha]

the geek in me squee'd and clapped its hands when wild magic and Sips popped up.

[@rezuplays5942]

a small percentage is WILD MAGIC. *curse starts growing* a BIG GIANT PERCENTAGE OF WILD MAGICCCCC

[@GG-Gamer1]

YAY!!! SIPS!!!

[@mindisfrozen]

I see a Sips, but no Sneeze!

[@joshmargolis1424]

I was watching with my friend and yelled out SIPS and they were so confused

[@a1theloser59]

One of my party members genuinely turned into a potted plant while fighting a god

[@whoseverpanic3160]

Is would have been ironic if it was a god of nature 😂

[@thefunkyfish5640]

Happened to someone in my game while she was trying to make a move on her favorite npc

[@JaelinBezel]

That sounds distinctly unhelpful

[@Ivoryforge11207]

Jocat : * talks about wild magic* Sips : *appears*

[@newgamer9144]

*yes*

[@KurrinaNightwalker420]

I think I heard puffin in here too.

[@radiantbluewolf7436]

@@KurrinaNightwalker420 WHERE???

[@KurrinaNightwalker420]

Yea nvm I misheard my bad

[@savvythedivineyethuggable7493]

Fellow men of culture I see.

[@headjuice125]

"My dad owns Castendo. I'M THE SORCERER BOY, I'M THE ONE WHO CASTS!"

[@JoCat]

I love dennis and arnold

[@waynerooneyisbest]

I got my magic from my parents, please don't tease me

[@taylorjones1641]

I wonder why Arnold stopped animating

[@Sir_Bucket]

The adventures of the sorcerer boy and Mr bard

[@lapaba1236]

Whats this reference to?

[@mindofthelion712]

My favorite Wild Magic Surge effect is "rewrite the memories of the nearest 1d100 children to believe that you are one of their parents"

[@GBS4893]

Damn is this one awkward.

[@candycadet528]

Oh dear lord. That opens up so many consequences that my brain hurts. This potentially rewrites entire campaigns or is just like awkward.

[@mindofthelion712]

Alternatively, all items carried or worn by target are transmuted into water

[@aceofjacks7071]

I mean if it happened when I was in an orphanage I wouldn't complain tbh

[@Ghostra-jz9vs]

@@ShugoAWay he'll yeet them for you

[@SpectralKnight]

We actually had a guy whose sorcerer character was flying around when he needed to do a surge roll. He fireballed himself and broke concentration (unconscious). Now he needed to do a second roll because the DM was like why not you used the thing that lets me decide when you roll as well. And the Fireball had knocked him out so he would be down a death save from fall damage. He turned into a potted plant, crashed into the ground and became normal (still unconscious), Where my Warlock could rush over and healing potion him.

[@CPTBlarg117]

Oh yeah, it's big brain time.

[@gavinbrown216]

“Not again”

[@zyggybaranowski6852]

Me: A potted plant? Plant: Begins to wiggle jocat-ishly ME: JOCAT THE POTTED PLANT!

[@ZesTofthelemon]

*JoCrap 🤓 (yes i know this was 11 months ago, it's meant to be a joke lel)

[@aduckwithayoutubechannel]

Potted plant: **dons fedora and leaps into action** _Doo bee doo bee doo baa_ _Doo bee doo bee doo baa_ _HE’S A D&D PLAYING, MAIDEN LAYING CREATURE OF ACTION!_ _HE’S A CERAMIC LITTLE PLANT MAN WHO’S NEVER FLINCHED FROM THE FRA-EE-AY-EE-AY!_ _HE DOES MORE THAN JUST SPEED-RANT!_ _CAUSE HE’S A MAGICAL POTTED PLANT!_ _AND THE DRAGONS SWOON WHENEVER THEY HEAR HIM SAY:_ *“…”* _HE’S JO-CAAAAAAAAAAT!_ _JOCAT THE POTTED PLAAAAAAAANT!_ _POTTED PLANT!_ _POTTED PLANT!_ _POTTED PLANT!_

[@smolglitch]

now id love to see a doofenshmirtz themed bbeg where they only recognize the pc if they pull out their weapon or something bbeg, roaming a town in broad daylight: "Well, I expected my nemesis to arrive here already but if they aren't coming I just have to let my evil schemes out, and you look like the adventuring sorts, so I'm sure you'd be at least mildly interested. The inspiration for my plan comes from my tragic backstory as a garden gnome, for you see..." then the person removes their bandana or something bbeg: "Hmm? A wiggleborn barbarian?" proceeds to roll their eyes and draw a sword bbeg: "JOCAT the wiggleborn barbarian!?"

[@ViralN9]

I'm steadily getting convinced that all these characters are just part of one massive adventuring party.

[@UltimaXReborn]

A party consisting of one of each class. The madness.

[@ihategnomes6247]

Better than 4 rogues, a druid, and a monk *stares at my current party*

[@DLOFT002]

@@ihategnomes6247 makes me appreciate my crew a little bit more. 2 monks, 1 paladin, 1 rogue, 1 ranger(sometimes), 1 sorcerer pretending to be a cleric, and then me, being a wizard so that we have some actual range damage.

[@RebelGuitarist747]

One of my partys currently has a barbarian, sorcerer, monk, gunslinger(me) and 3 clerics(ambition, grave, tempest)

[@DLOFT002]

@@RebelGuitarist747 clerics for days. Do you guys ever go down?

[@Elliandr]

*actually pauses to read* : "remember fry's puppy" "ha got you bet you're sad now" Yes. Yes I am...

[@saltyswan9738]

R.I.P. Seymour

[@Killjoyreign]

Dogomite

[@dxjxc91]

If it takes forever ♪ I will wait for you, ♪ For a thousand summers ♪ I will wait for you, ♪ T_T

[@advknight4351]

Till you're back beside me, 🎶 till I'm holding you 🎶 Till I hear you sigh 🎶 here in my arms. 🎶

[@kindnesstemmie6625]

Seymour will not be forgotten, not matter how many times Netflix takes it off

[@IceRuby-ur4zl]

900 year old Wizard: "I have for studied for countless centuries to master the arcane focus." My 317 year old Elf Sorcerer: "I dunno, man. Sounds like a skill issue to me."

[@bloodyidit4506]

Enemy sorcerers are the reason my Bard's "I think i might be his dad" jokes work. And in one case it was true in that campaign.

[@minnarew]

impromptu family reunion

[@frogcultleader1811]

equal and opposite energy of gorgug’s “are you my dad?”

[@bloodyidit4506]

@@frogcultleader1811 "i'm everyone's dad, son."

[@Mordechay98]

the bard: you wont hurt your father! the sourcerer: you werent even in my birthday!

[@K1llerKreal]

The potted Jocat plant with that look has got to be my new favourite expression from now on

[@JimmyRaven]

And the fact that the wiggler DM is also a potted plant is a nice touch.

[@dindapriska]

Need that as a merch!

[@FlintTD]

He's a real wiggler now!

[@minaly22]

The first adventure for this group of 'players' would be to undo the magical curse that has turned their wiggler DM into a potted plant!

[@CRAZED4MORE]

chachachi Jocat?

[@AGrayPhantom]

1:50 It's Sips from Dingo Doodles!!

[@ASandrei321]

Yeee :3

[@RouxAroo666]

And he just had to mention the fireplane. Hehe

[@artpossum7870]

I am happy I'm not the only one who noticed

[@demonderpz7937]

Love how wild magic is just always represented by Sips

[@JaelinBezel]

Is it Sips or Dingo?

[@savvythedivineyethuggable7493]

@@JaelinBezel It's Sips. Dingo is the KZbinr.

[@cinnamonzor7043]

he's a cultural icon

[@katiedouglas19]

Well....he deserves it.

[@flawlesspiner1674]

2:42 experiencing this part becomes very different once you know that becoming a potted plant is literally on the wild magic table

[@JunkJester6131]

1:50 Is it just me, or does anyone else feel like Sips is practically the mascot/icon for Wild Magic?

[@joshuahicks7798]

Yes, yes he is.

[@scottbruckner4653]

He's the only character I know who uses it. With proficiency.

[@Curera291]

I love that :p u I'm being a mascot for wild magic-

[@josiemcmillan5012]

I actually said out loud, “Holy hell, he’s a Dingo Doodles fan!”

[@YuubiTimberwolf]

Sips is a legend.

[@Blak0the0mag]

Santient mokey, that randomly cast fire plane portals... Never heard this one before Haven't realise, that Dingo is actually pretty popular, until now

[@TheGuardDuck]

When you can tell a story like that, it gets catchy, and you just itch to see how it ends, so you remember it. Plus there don't seem to be a lotta rpg KZbinrs. Puffin and Bashew are both super funny, and their assosiation with Dingo makes sure she gets attention.

[@krishnavbose9303]

Siiiiiiiippppppppsssssss

[@theaeon]

Siiiips! *jumbled screaming*

[@ashtong1039]

@@TheGuardDuck oh wait sips

[@mateovitela5861]

Holy SIPS

[@hellspawn3200]

01:55 I get the reference now

[@Therberus]

Hey JoCat, I love all of your content, you definitely don't diverse all the abuse that came your way. Thank you for everything that you have done, and I hope that whatever you do next brings you joy and happiness. Stay strong 👍

[@muhammadramadhan2208]

One time I turned into a potted plant while casting invisibility to get away from town guards. My teammate was searching for me for hours. Because even after the invisibility wore off, there's literally no reason for them to think that a random potted plant must be their missing friend. Eventually the rogue pulled "that potted plant wasn't there before" out of his ass and deduct through crazy sherlock holmes reasoning that it must be "the sorcerer with his crazy antic again". He just straight up smash me against the wall which turn me back to normal, albeit unconscious.

[@Remi-Toruzen]

Just M That nat 20 roll to break the laws of logic and “save” the poor plenty friend of his.

[@Leivve]

To be fair, after x amount for irl time, the joke has worn off; and I would permit a pc to ass grab like that just so we can move on.

[@muhammadramadhan2208]

@@Leivve nah just hours in game time, the whole thing were done in minutes. Would've been quicker if they weren't fucking around with me.

[@thinkEdem]

I mean, that effect should only last until your next round, but I like the way it went instead... (Not to mention you also become incapacitated, so your concentration on invisibility immediately ends...)

[@socksthecat13]

Dingo Doodles and Puffin Forest, get over here and play D&D with this boi!

[@capterson4]

That would be.... ABSERD.

[@fashionsoulsonlysouls5575]

capterson4 ‘MYESSSSSS!

[@elliottwood5423]

Yes please! I love them all get them together to have a party

[@nathanwilson7929]

Make Jonathan Pruit the DM and add that to the top of my bucket list of things I want to do. **Though I have other dream DMs, I think Pruit would be the better fit to the group vs Monty or Jerry k.

[@ianmurray8925]

Dingo was on here earlier she left a comment

[@theflaasmomflyr8691]

“Remember Fry’s puppy” “Ha got you you’re sad now” “Now I am too” Oof.

[@shirothejunglevayne3807]

no one: absolutely no one: me: So my character is a sorcerer, his dad is a human and his mother is a red dragon, whe--- DM: *oh god no*

[@simonvandooren7071]

His dad was a bard, you mean?

[@elzed2667]

Wait chromatic dragons can’t shapechange so-

[@juangallegos2988]

@@elzed2667 maybe it was Tiamat

[@user-sm4mi8ug9q]

​​@@elzed2667perhaps they had a scroll of polymorphing conveniently laying around? Also I think chromatics can still learn magic, so it probably wouldn't be too far fetched for one to have a scroll or two.

[@ripl0x]

"A small genetic loan of a million mana." Lol Also, I hope he's a potted plant in the next video...for continuity.

[@heatherirwin1333]

riplox sadly it only last 6 seconds

[@zarjamar1883]

I literally laughed out loud when I saw the Sips cameo. XD. Nice!

[@fat_bird6969]

Good reference

[@TextRibbon]

My eyes got huge. XD

[@phylippezimmermannpaquin2062]

Ah, weve reached optimal like capacity

[@av.punk.801]

Yes

[@masencahill]

So there's this guy. He calls himself Rick, and turns himself into a potted plant. I swear, it's the funniest shit iv ever seen

[@droman608]

Metamagic: The one school that Wizards cannot have unless they multiclass.

[@gustavodasilvaprobst890]

Using 2 levels.

[@elijahs7374]

It's a feat now

[@BM03]

1:20 BILLY MAGE HERE TO TELL YOU ABOUT THIS AMAZING NEW CLASS

[@Heavenlyhounds96]

That better be the name for the Wizard or Warlock XD

[@Herobrine-xc5xk]

Amazing

[@SetSeth-yl6ke]

BUT IM NOT DONE YET :D

[@koohikoo]

A a sorcerer main, I simultaneously agree and am offended

[@Samagachi]

0:57 I find it hard to believe that anyone who willingly runs a wild magic sorcerer can easily piss their pants in fear

[@litchtheshinigami8936]

the way my character gets slapped around by anyone anyways (i have almost died several times due to dumb things.. i got healed by this elf woman in town and instead of thanking her properly my overly rizzy Bisexual rabbit person decided to slap her ass and try to rizz her up. she then cast ice spike wich then brought me back to 2 health again. then the very beginning of the campaign my character was so cocky she started a bar fight and got smacked to china INSTANTLY KNOCKING HER UNCONSIOUS. however she does not learn from these things and just continues on being unhinged.) another fun thing is when the team decided hey lets yeet you up this cliff (cuz i'm smol) and if i had fucked up my dexterity i could have very well died horribly right then and there. she doesn't give a singular fuck tho unless it's in a dungeon then she does know to watch out because humanoids can be decieved monsters and beasts cannot at least not as easily.

[@requiembeeblebroxx]

Where sorcerer gets REALLY wild is when 'fireball right on top of self' is deliberate. *RQG feels intensify*

[@yugijak]

1:53 Ok that's a reference to dingo doodle. No way it isn't. How's Quinora liking that impromptu vacation anyway

[@Sectsoldier]

She wants a Refund

[@BlackOctoberFox]

0:21 When you were supposed to slay the Dragon but you're playing Bard.

[@destroyerinazuma96]

Always makes me think of the Dragon Half fantasy manga about the daughter of the knight who married a dragon instead of killing it

[@destroyerinazuma96]

@@capeisdead2987 ah, thank you! I forgot

[@Technodreamer]

My cleric/rogue is now four years younger due to a wild-magic area we had to explore early in the campaign. His twin sister is not particularly happy about suddenly being the older one.

[@jacoblansman8147]

I want to know more - how did this happen?

[@Technodreamer]

@@jacoblansman8147 Random magical effect de-aged him by four years

[@shadowgjhgitgjh2215]

On the plus side, that wild magic did wonders for his skin, he looks years younger!

[@Technodreamer]

@@shadowgjhgitgjh2215 Fun fact, we played that campaign up to level 20 and several max-level one-shots, and nobody ever cast dispel magic on him. He was still younger right up until he took the boon of immortality!

[@silverspirit920]

I realy love the Sips referance, but the *F I R E P L A N E* referance is just in another level.

[@andrewpenn1145]

I love how the sorcerer is a doppelganger. Looking to commit a little inheritance fraud, are we? Edit: Nicely done, Jo. You avoided having to actually finish all those commissions.

[@dreadnaught5029]

Andrew The Mighty I play a doppelganger it’s fun

[@dylanwight5764]

@@dreadnaught5029 I once played a topless gangster. They're kinda similar, right?

[@Carstuff111]

@@dylanwight5764 Bwahahahahahaha!!!!

[@dreadnaught5029]

Dylan Wight I don’t think so

[@ziziorens348]

*Obligatory Dingo Doodles reference acknowledgement*

[@1r587]

*Obligatory Zone-Tan profile pic acknowledgement*

[@ziziorens348]

1r5Drooodle nice.

[@lukedeakin7124]

*Obligatory Panic Grim Tongue reference acknowledgement*

[@TheMeanAdmin]

Ooh, "getting my life together" is an option. Sold!

[@amyboyer6559]

The wild magic sorcerer being sips from dingo doodles fools gold campaign is the most wish fulfilling thing I’ve seen today. Thank you for this great gift.

[@twirlingwitch5446]

There’s a wild magic sorcerer in my party, and the sorcerer and the Dm both decided to increase the possibility from 1 in 20 to a 1 in 4 chance. Later in the campaign, the sorcerer was put under the geas spell. Immediately after he was put under the spell, he got a wild magic surge and turned into a sheep. Needless to say, the encounter went smoothly.

[@worthasandwich]

Our groups "Suddenly Sheep" story happened when we were fighting a white dragon, and the druid could not make it that week... that left the cleric and warlock to fight the dragon.

[@SignoftheMagi]

You want some real fun? Make it 1 to 1.

[@zimzimph]

Those odds are moot if the DM doesn't even call for it (RAW there's no exact way to decide when it fires, it's 100% up to the DM)

[@nimbus997]

Might I ask, what is a geas spell? I dont play D&D-

[@niminox6479]

Odds that feel more or less balanced - number on the die needs to match or be less than the level the spell was cast at

[@cynthiaschuh6538]

did anyone see that ´make bard x paladin mutual and canon` thing in the wheel of randomness

[@usafriptide1719]

We were sooooooo clohohose! :'(

[@shadowstriker6506]

I was distracted by the “Actually play D&D with someone”

[@ninjabluefyre3815]

Bard and Paladin are my favorite classes...

[@bass-dc9175]

The Effects @ 1:58 turning inside out making a good live action disney remake explosive diarrhea endless bombardment of eggs eternal spooning losing your pinky finger graduating from clown school marrying the last flower you smelled getting lost in the sauce becoming spiderman exploding, then exploding again turn into nothing but abs tea tastes like candy drown in puppies swim through puppies be adored like a puppy remember fry's puppy ha got you bet you're sad now I am too now, shit beat dark souls bring your OCs to life nail a drawing on the first try fail a drawing every try fail to even pick up a pen become a mascot for a fast food joint become a one hit wonder grow fur on your teeth every inch of your skin breaks out secrete soap out of your pores bleed milk piss milk turn all liquid in the area to milk non stop casting flaming nutt shots getting your life together paying off that loan take out six more loans become a famous hobo eat butterfly wings grow all four limbs of the forbidden one win free tickets to guam go on a cruise with tom cruise become one with the force dabbing growing three extra fingers but on random parts of your body growing a tail made out of tongue material running out of made-up effects for this one

[@softbread2073]

@Andrew Whiting arent they two girls?

[@Le_Codex]

I just noticed that JoCrap is holding the mic at the base of his wiggler hat, which would be where his head and mouth actually are

[@LassBisharp]

When you said that wild magic is the only one that matters, I felt that. Also, I totally noticed you did a sketch of Sips here!

[@witchBoi_Connor]

The ending screen of you being the potted wiggler is hilarious. It might sound disingenuous but I just want to genuinely compliment this video because it was great, like the other Crap Guides.

[@GaijinGoombah]

0:06 I see what you did there JoCat.

[@lrugelgumiho4751]

Never expect you to be here

[@nebs6888]

Holy. Why does nobody recognize you!

[@professornope4792]

Gaijin in a D&D Comment section...SAMURAI FIGHTER

[@cameronscott9399]

OMG YOU PLAY DND?!?!?!?

[@ninjabluefyre3815]

What did he do?

[@dymphygoossens]

I had a wild magic sorcerer whose biggest dream was to become a potted plant. He did.

[@SkintelNKeychain]

I like how different jo acts here as opposed to when working w others. He is so wholesome when he isn't being possessed by a wiggler

[@starsilverinfinity]

_"I spun it to hard because of my stonkingly huge muscles"_ XDD

[@acitrus]

When the Fairly Oddparents were good >.

[@inquisitordragon6827]

9 out of 10. Because you the potted Wiggler ain't Wiggling in the outtro.

[@jeffreycollins5368]

That's because he is an angry wiggler. No wiggle only rage.

[@TheMigMan3225]

What other video was there more wigglers?

[@jasoncampbell3558]

0:05 Panic Grimtounge from the Unexpectables. Nice.

[@dorkmax7073]

The Sorcerer is the guy in class who falls asleep but still coasts through the with a C+

[@yourcasualgamer4120]

Please do a crap guide to D&D: Dungeon master

[@mattk6719]

The most powerful class of them all.

[@merchantziro4285]

Oh my God, that would be greatness

[@josefzalusky7307]

“Hey, if you were expecting a video on how you can be an influential force of nature, basically a god in a fictional world, too bad, this is about DM-ing, where you have to deal with CLERICS and Seduction rolls, welcome to a crap guide to DND.”

[@Someone-sq8im]

yES.

[@articusramos808]

Today Mark's the day.....

[@hydrxyMoron]

"The Wheeeel of Wiiiild Magiiiic!" Delivery was so on point hahaha

[@johndoe5432]

Playing sorcerer as anything other than wild magic is just anti fun.

[@mintmane]

@@johndoe5432 My Divine Soul Kobold Sorcerer who's convinced he's a lesser god says otherwise.

[@doubleoof7907]

So Joseph Joestar is technically a sorcerer because he got a magic-sunlight-power inheritance from Johnathan.

[@unknownentityenthusiast6765]

Honestly? I could see that. Would that make Jonathan a warlock with Baron Zepelli as his patron though?

[@burningcole2538]

Arcane knight for the OG JoJo

[@NotAHologram]

Stand users are Way of the astral self monks then

[@Rain-cs3wp]

I’m a sorcerer in my first ever D&D campaign and I cannot describe to you how much our DM was laughing when my first Wild Magic Surge was ACTUALLY turn into a potted plant.

[@t.m.gacutan5523]

"make bard x paladin mutual and canon" DO IT COWARD

[@Moh4a4d]

Canon, but not mutual.

[@lukedeakin7124]

@@Moh4a4d nah, we know its mutual from the races video

[@Scorpodael]

@@lukedeakin7124 They got married in the Warlock video, too.

[@shimahatusi4456]

1:57 SIPS

[@jayjaygolden5123]

I love that Sips is the embodiment of wild magic sorcerers here.

[@masterpiece1817]

I love that “Turn into a potted plant” is an actual effect of wild magic CF

[@nomnomgoblin8901]

Oh cool Sips and... 0:06.... is that Panic Grimtongue?! THE BEST DAMN BARD IN ALIVAST!?

[@FatTexanGamer]

Hm...Looks like i- Oh, wait. It’s just Tiengo in a Panic Grimtongue costume.

[@kurothefox6020]

Woah Panic plot twist, 2nd favorite character of The Unexpectables

[@ThieftheFlygon]

I did not expect to see Panic here. That’s a pleasant surprise.

[@maaxorus]

JoCat watches The Unexpectables? My life is complete!

[@scottbruckner4653]

Hello, I'm also from that fandom. Good to meet you.

[@ixsusdalder]

"Make Bard X Paladin mutual and cannon" I lost my shit at that. (The Bard is cute, she deserves love)

[@TheGuardDuck]

Pretty sure she gets a lotta love... Of course, she wants the one who doesn't want her...

[@kaitlyn5324]

1:40 THIS is what should have had the picture of Sheogorath.

[@heatherirwin1333]

0:45 you really had to do it to us...

[@Zthewise]

I don't think I've seen an angrier potted plant.

[@phylippezimmermannpaquin2062]

First I'm told of lewd plant pots now its angery plant pots

[@jewlbunny]

Panic Grimmtoung, Sips, and the late great Billy Mase. Best one yet.

[@trevorpayne8674]

"One way trip to the fire plane!" >Sips Hehehe

[@neophobicnyctophile8264]

I want a Pissed Off JoCat Crap Guide Potted Plant with Sound-Activated Servo figurine! IN EVERY ROOM OF MY HOUSE.

[@lizapiashko9105]

1:21 SIPS!!!???? AND THE PORTAL TO THE FIRE PLANE FROM EPISODE 5/6!!!??? WHY THIS MANY DINGO DOODLES REFERENCES?????

[@kaiwolfie7828]

They made a video together

[@DirtyDerg]

Because it's like the unexpectables or Mathew Mercer, can't go one day without someone referencing their favorite podcast or group numbering in the hundreds of thousands comment and want to emulate some aspect of their success instead of wanting to play a character all their own. Slips isn't anything new and neither is the whole concept of character creating, but FFS I get tired of starry eyed socket bulging loins ready to burst whenever their favorite content creators are mentioned.

[@finnpom7795]

@@DirtyDerg They were just happy that Sips was in the video jeez

[@Skysupercharged]

Because yes

[@patrickkirchner2254]

HALF-ORC BARD

[@XieronDraxin]

Wild Magic finally getting the attention it deserves

[@TheOriginalCDub]

I love that sorcerers are portrayed as entitled trust fund babies here. It’s just so perfect.

[@topsyturvy1097]

My sorcerer is SO obnoxious he's great

[@Heartlesscube7]

imagine being born being hard carried through life by one of your parent's genes.

[@awesomemantroll1088]

I think you're starting to understand wealth inheritance

[@sentimentalmariner590]

Too real m8.

[@mysidianbard5890]

The wheel of wild magic was one of the best things I've ever seen. Simultaneously so very true and hilarious.

[@stroke9239]

I find it hilarious that the "make bard x paladin mutual and cannon" one was bigger than the others, even if it wasn't intentional

[@PedroShaPe]

"Zippy Zappy Casty Blasty, watch for the lightning, it gets nasty" 100/100 would replay again. 3 months old video, but i still keep getting back just for that single line.

[@comabsolver]

Victor It is probably the most accurate description of Dota 2's Storm Spirit I have ever heard

[@thronezwei4412]

I play a Storm Soul sorcerer and this description of the subtype is accurate AF.

[@vladtimofte6511]

Storm Spirit! I am Storm Spirit! O ho! Storm Spirit has arrived! Ha ha! I am here! Feel the wind in your hair! Stormy weather… The calm before the storm… Storm Spirit! Storm clouds are gathering. Storm Spirit, moving in. Stormy weather time! Told you a storm was coming!

[@magolor3219]

Darkness, darkness, darkness. Scaly in denial- Jocrap at the bottom: for the last time, I’m a Wiggler, not a dragon.

[@fayethefey1213]

our party had been transported to feywild and after some time of looking around and being amazing and horrified and confused we found a giant palace. we started walking towards it and once we were about 50 meters away from it and fey princess came out and started screaming at us and telling us how we were intruders. she wouldn't shut up for a while so my character said "you talk too much". she then looked very upset and the next thing i know i was potted plant. that's a really d&d story of mine

[@TbassIS42]

Love these guides! Thanks for your time and efforts to create them!

[@Alovatololo]

2:30 True, I felt that in my soul. I had the dumbest sorcerer. The very definition of failing upwards.

[@Morfeucomvoce]

I love how you are adding action-figures on the table as you make videos on classes.

[@DrakonLameth]

I mean, for the Crap Guide to Monster Hunter Weapons series, the fire spit got more and more cluttered by all the weapons surrounding it as he went on, so it makes sense that the miniatures for the classes all hang out together as he goes for this Crap Guide set.

[@Brawneteer]

Had a great moment during session last week. Our party has had the magic weapon "Sunlight Rose" in our possession for a while now. For the most part it's been in the hands of our Sorcerer/Warlock multiclass character, but just recently changed hands to the new Rogue of the party and has finally started seeing use. The first time the Rogue hits something with the scythe, which happened to be a demon, the DM calls for a d100 roll. Roll happens, and the result causes the demon to instantly vanish as it's banished back to the 9 hells. At this point, the DM reveals to us that the magic scythe has the hidden property of Wild Magic every time it hits something, with certain changes made to actually make it beneficial, I.E. negative effects caused by wild magic are applied to the struck target. The Rogue moves to his next target, a hellhound, and hits it, causing another d100 roll. At this point I reference this video with "The wheel of wild magic" and the final gag of "turn in to a potted plant", and the DM freaks out because I called the hellhound turning into a potted plant.

[@epsreborn9718]

Everytime I watch one of these I want to give each and every one of the characters - as well as Jo - a warm, reassuring hug.

[@Involuntarily_Retro]

JoCat, why must you tease us by missing the best wild magic option by one?

[@jacobrodriguez5289]

Feather beard, fireball on self or sudden sheep?

[@Domitaku]

@@jacobrodriguez5289 Fireball on self is my Arcane Trickster Rogue Fire Genasi concept xD

[@jacobrodriguez5289]

@@Domitaku you absolute madman

[@SladePate]

Thanks for the drawing of the Smol Dog.

[@GrandleJams]

You gotta take the time to truly appreciate it. Take your time and stare into the dog's soul.

[@JoCat]

I'm glad you like it. half of the time it takes to make these videos is trying to come up with what to draw

[@Carstuff111]

@@JoCat You, sir, make D&D even more awesome!! Was the smol dog Seymour waiting on Fry?

[@OviraptorFan]

101 small dogs.....heheheheheh(did the 101 like)

[@rat_lemonade]

2:46 I love that turning into a potted plant is legitimately on the wild magic surge table

[@bunnybismuth]

I always crack up at the outro to this one. I know it's coming but it always makes me laugh.

[@razorraptor2247]

I hear one of the things on the wheel is summon a tarrasque through karaoke and lights.

[@FallenStarProductions]

Ha sips from Dingo’s story! Hilarious as always! Same with the animations! I’m trying to get into animation and would love some support

[@doofisconfused]

I died when Sips just poofed out from nowhere.

[@JoshSweetvale]

0:32 Ooh yes. 1:50 Referencing TB and Dingo in the same video.

[@LRpaul145]

So, the party so far: Dwarf Barbarian Tiefling Bard Elf Cleric Halfling Druid Human Fighter Dragonborn Monk Elf Paladin Half-orc Ranger Gnome Rogue Changeling Sorcerer

[@MasterGibz]

Changeling Sorcerer?

[@Bluecho4]

@@MasterGibz Doppelganger and Changeling are close enough to be confused. Changelings are the playable race, according to Wayfarer's Guide to Eberron.

[@TheGuardDuck]

Did I miss something? How do we know he's a changeling?

[@unfortunateimperial6019]

@@TheGuardDuck, when he showed the joking character sheet (at 0:45), it said Dopleganger, and the closest playable class to a dopleganger is a changeling.

[@unfortunateimperial6019]

And the Wiggler DM

[@surgeseraphim7741]

1:45 is that a reference to dingo doodle's D&D story I see?

[@alphaslootari3126]

I just realized... According to this, Azula's a sorcerer and Zuko's a wizard.

[@jacoblansman8147]

Azula casts a decent bit of lightning, she's a Warlock casting Eldritch Blast. Zuko is a monk who multiclassed into Wizard just to cast Fireball.

[@professionallybad126]

Technically all benders are sorcerers