Addicted To Drugs And Alcohol...

[@rachel9120]

I never realized how good lookin Mod is until he got clean these past few months. Sober looks damn good on him

[@emotionallyexhausted1410]

Same girl, same

[@tabatha8843]

Agree 💯👏🏼👏🏼

[@tabatha8843]

bkob jackson have you seen him before he cleaned up?? Big difference. The clarity in his eyes

[@nb244]

I agree

[@Courtneyhamby294]

Agree!

[@josefsorgiovanni721]

Be the rockstar that doesn't die at 27. Thanks for sharing man

[@normanormie]

Josef Sorgiovanni Lol... he is..

[@meaghan3911]

he's not a rockstar though lmaoo

[@josefsorgiovanni721]

@@meaghan3911 o ok

[@allyreneeful]

He’s 32

[@sarakate5651]

@@allyreneeful I was gonna say.. he accomplished that already.

[@emeraldxo]

"I didn't really like being fucked up. I just had this desire to be out of reality all the time."

[@Vectd]

exactly how I feel everytime im under the influence

[@Jenny-bf4ss]

AGREED! Out of reality into the wonderland....out of wonderland and into hell.

[@cata3273]

your name says that u think drugs are cool

[@wesleythacker830]

How i wake up feeling each day ..

[@Dj3nlightened]

Word

[@ryanwhite9437]

We need more people like this, willing to be transparent, willing to give their testimony, willing to be honest about these things that are HARD to talk about and share. 'Preciate you dude.

[@TD-ry2ez]

“the pain you’re feeling can’t compare to the joy that is coming.”

[@nosteviewonder8959]

I love this comment.

[@nosteviewonder8959]

Alot of people need to hear this

[@woahmanitsvalerie]

I needed this today. Thank you 💕

[@nosteviewonder8959]

@@woahmanitsvalerie Keep your head up, healing will come to us in due time

[@woahmanitsvalerie]

NoStevieWonder! Yes! We got this.

[@SarahBaska]

[@alexasalguero3139]

Omg SARAH

[@Reign127]

Its Sarah Fucking Baska tubers now I have to watch

[@angeldangerous7346]

Sarah Baska 🙏💙

[@baileydrouin]

we love you

[@JordynMariah979]

What the flip I love youuu what are you doin here omggg

[@BeautybyEm337]

“i just had this desire to always be outside of reality as much as possible” i’m crying

[@davefx7949]

You can do that in healthy ways. Learn an instrument, learn to paint. That's what art is all about.

[@pixiewhittle505]

ive tried painting but since im a useless drawer i do acrylic paint pouring-covered some vinyl today :)

[@dainodawg3160]

not to be a dick, but this is literally what every drug user says and does.

[@KimberlyRSWorld]

As a pisces this is very relatable.

[@triscuit2314]

Kimberly Rosa ima pisces and have this same feeling! do pisces like to escape reality or something?

[@gal1885]

As a former alcoholic and addict who is now sober....and am in a super lonely/confused phase in my life....I loved this and I’m so grateful that he created and shared it ❤️

[@Thatmauiwowie]

“No matter the amount of negativity you have been presented with...five minutes from now could be the best moment of your life” -MODSUN

[@TopFrisch]

*COOOUUKAAAYYNEEE!!!1!!1!one!*

[@wolfieweirdbeard6656]

Or it could just get worse and more negative

[@fauberkaupfmann982]

But its fake. Trust me, its Pretty easy to distinguish a real good moment from a fake, drug induced one. Cocaine hangover (for the lack of a better term) was worse than depression for me, one of the reasons i quit Pretty early (thank god).

[@rinn1061]

I’m hitting 6 years clean from fentanyl this December. It is POSSIBLE. My son gets to be proud of his momma, gets to watch me walk the stage for my bachelors next month, gets to have me there for him mentally and physically when he needs me. We can recover, it is possible, and I am sending all my love to anyone who needs it.

[@woahmanitsvalerie]

Erin! That is such great news. Awesome job with your sobriety. I hope my two brothers recover one day soon because my heart has been broken for the past 15+ years of watching my brothers on heroin, fentanyl, meth, and anything else they can get their hands on. Your achievements are huge, and I know your son must be so proud of his momma! You are amazing.

[@thejaimebush]

Congrats on six years! And your bachelors! One day at a time babe! 💖💖💖

[@mellyme2184]

Congrats and god bless on your monumental achievements!

[@violetdrool]

So proud of you 😊🎊🎉

[@rinn1061]

You guys are the sweetest! I hope you are all doing well in your own lives, as well ✨

[@brianb2454]

after losing everything at 24 years old to coke and dope, i got sober.. now going on 3 1/2 years!

[@pain5731]

Fuck Yeah!

[@PVerse-fh4hl]

There is a street with a retirement home on the one side, and a kindergarten on the opposite side. The speed limit is 40 km/h. You speed down that road going 120 km/h and get caught by a law enforcement officer. The next day you are in court trying to defend yourself. You tell the Judge ‘’Im sorry I will never do it again’’ to which he replies ‘’by keeping the law in the future does not make up for breaking it in the past. There is a penalty that needs to be paid. If I let you go now, the penalty will be unpaid and no justice would be served.’’ The penalty he gives you is massive - you cant pay it because you don’t have that kind of money. You go to prison. Later that night, your 1stnight in prison, the warden comes and open your cell door telling you that you are free to go. Someone paid your fine. Will you accept the payment or will you remain in ‘’prison’’? You asked the prison warden ‘’who paid my fine?’’. He says some guy went and sold all he has in order to pay your penalty. You say ‘’cool thanks, I don’t even know the guy’’. What would you do next? 1. Climb into your car and drive down that very street again @ 120 km/h, knowing or assuming this stranger will pay your penalty again because he might have some other stuff to sell to bail you out again? 2. Try and find out who this person is and get to know him and thank him for what he has done. Also not to do what you did that caused you to land up in prison because it cost this person who paid your penalty a lot - He made a massive sacrifice for you. If the fine was $ 100 000 000 and you took out a loan to pay the penalty (hypothetically speaking), you would still be & 100 000 000 in debt. Only someone without debt can pay your debt. Jesus was without sin. Adam and Eve were naked in the garden before eating the forbidden fruit. They did not notice anything strange of their nakedness - to them it was normal. Once they ate of the forbidden fruit, their eyes opened to their sinfulness - they disobeyed God and realized they were naked. ‘’ The woman saw that the tree was good for food and delightful to look at, and that it was desirable for obtaining wisdom. So she took some of its fruit and ate it; she also gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it. 7 Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew they were naked; so they sewed fig leaves together and made coverings for themselves. ’’ Genesis 3:6-7 The fig leaves they sewed together can also be seen as ‘’self righteous works’’ to cover up their sin - the fig leaves won’t last forever as they will dry out and wither, exposing their nakedness again. God provided proper clothing for them to cover their nakedness properly…….. ‘’The LORD God made clothing from skins for the man and his wife, and he clothed them. ‘’ Genesis 3:21 This is the 1st time anything died / was killed. It was killed so that the skin of the animal could be used as clothing for the 2 naked people instead of them using leaves. During Passover the Jews had to sacrifice a lamb each year to atone for their sins. The lamb had to be spotless and without blemish. Jesus is called THE LAMB OF GOD as He was without sin, YET HE was slaughtered so that his BLOOD could cover our sins. Our good works (fig leaves) wont do. For you are saved by grace through faith, and this is not from yourselves; it is God’s gift- not from works, so that no one can boast.

[@TodayWithKyle]

Same thing here brother, lost everything way before 24 but decided to get sober at 24, going on one year and 4 months 💜

[@TodayWithKyle]

@@PVerse-fh4hl god ain’t got shit to do with my recovery, I put in the hard fucking work and looked within myself and did hard fucking work and nothing was easy or gifted by fucking no one but fucking me.

[@katiesandin7905]

Brian B.... good to hear! That's so great. It's not always easy but you are doing it...props!

[@tylerlambert7521]

122 days sober today. Drinking almost ended my marriage, caused me to die, and also took some of my best friends from me. I watch this video once a month now to try and remember why I'm doing this. Mod, you are one of my biggest inspirations of all time. If you can get sober and stay sober, so can I. Thank you for everything sir!

[@Dutchenter]

How you doing these days? 🍀

[@lemonwater8961]

Keep going 💪

[@Anninukichild]

U still good Tyler? Ever since covid lifes been tough on everyone 😢

[@143purple]

Hey can we get a update? 💜💜💜💜

[@tylerlambert7521]

Shit I’m so sorry guys. I have not relapsed once. My support circle has saved me a lot. I’ve almost fallen off the wagon a few times but my circle has saved me. As of right now I am 2 years and 10 months sober. My life has been hell lately but I haven’t thought about drinking at all. Besides the past 3 months, since I’ve gotten sober life has been a lot fucking better haha. If I had one message it’s trust the sobriety. It sucks at times. But trust in sobriety.

[@Idxk777]

Idk why this was in my recommendations but I’m glad I watched this 🖤

[@ravenlockwood3416]

I feel the same

[@christaleann4025]

Hannah X me too ♥️

[@chosen1980]

Same Frfr

[@normanormie]

Saaaaaammmeeeee

[@infowazz]

same here

[@halybackwd]

“this pain and this suffering that im going through will be gone one day”

[@iJuanGutierrez]

ha1l3y backw00d amen

[@laken118]

"Came to Believe" on the wall behind him, right by his head.... There's a saying in AA, "We came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity"

[@kaliyay7590]

❤❤❤❤ I absolutely love that you noticed that

[@mollyfoxxx]

L. S. AA helped save my life in the beginning but as I’m sure you know, they don’t support any mind altering substances such as weed. It’s a shame really because it’s hugely beneficial in terms of harm reduction/maintenance.

[@kimberlymason3767]

@@mollyfoxxx I agree.I have 23 years clean off drugs, including alcohol,I'm 43 btw.I do smoke though.It is the only thing that helps my pain n my PTSD n anxiety.They don't condone it,so I don't mention it.I don't lie but I still consider myself clean.Many will disagree.But imo,MY OPINION, it's better than pain killers that can literally kill you.Marijuana will NOT!!!!

[@laken118]

Molly Nolin I was actually onboard with “anti-weed” when I was first entering the program. It wasn’t until I ended up with my current partner, who uses marijuana for sleep, that I realized it’s entirely different. He can still stay off of every other mind-altering substance he struggles with. It truly is a case-by-case basis and definitely made me question the “die-hard” AA concept.

[@laken118]

Kimberly Mason you should read my last response to Molly, I totally agree.

[@elizabethbarnett1779]

I hope you see this. I'm almost 3 years sober now. I saw this video literally on day 1 of sobriety. Watching this again now today, is a burst of sunshine to my soul . This pulled me back again like that first day. The work you've done on yourself is my motivation to stay on track. I wish you nothing but the best. Lots of love. I hope I can hug you one day and say thank you. Thank you for making this video that I can pull up when I'm lonely and questioning myself.

[@praywithoutceasing2966]

It takes a real man to recognise the negative influence he may have had on people and apologise for it, respect! ✊🏽

[@surfinsilver]

Pray Without Ceasing Hello, I am building a channel based on addiction and helping others with kind words and happiness and positivity every day, in every video, I could use all the support & subscribers I can get to get the message out to people that it is possible to get clean! Check my vid out ❤️

[@Beantownn617]

“There’s a reason whiskey doesn’t taste like kool-aid” true fact 💙

[@kineticblues2766]

I always liked the taste of most opioids/ opiates unfortunately. well, heroin and oxycodone... I used to always joke that I'd love to turn that into a seasoning flavour. heh. ugh 😕

[@justinbaker5359]

@@kineticblues2766 oxy is an acquired taste

[@tittykittycookie2382]

@@justinbaker5359 Sho is

[@sarahwoodward4453]

kinetic blues too true

[@ShapeShifterPB]

Both are poison.

[@smartybabytv5547]

Mod sun dude start a podcast please! People love seeing this side of u! It’s clear u got a lot to say! Congrats on being clean fam

[@aje4298]

Yessssss

[@DonnieDeZahmbe]

I posted here a year ago about wanting to make a change. I had another self destructive binge in me, and it finally made me open my eyes. I just celebrated 5 months sober, and it feels great. Love you Mod, stay strong.

[@hamhi98]

Keep pushing forward

[@tammysaffordablecleaning]

Hope you're still going strong!!

[@143purple]

Hope all is well can we get a update 💜💜💜🙌

[@DonnieDeZahmbe]

*update* 2 years and 3 months! Every day without alcohol is a good day for me.

[@143purple]

@@DonnieDeZahmbe Hell yeah awesome 🙌💪😜 Good for you 😍😎💜

[@JoeTheBigShowParker]

I always thought you were a try hard & never liked you. This video changed my mind that you're a genuine guy with an actual personality.

[@hgs9880]

everybody wants to be Cobain so badly its incredible

[@JoeTheBigShowParker]

@@hgs9880 I knoooooow!!

[@anima6035]

@@hgs9880 dude you keep commenting this, you can't just whittle down a person's entire personality to "wants to be like cobain", like really?? Cmon my dude, life is not black and white👌x

[@hgs9880]

@@anima6035 youre dumb he said it himself in the beggining of the video that he wanted to be like all the artist who died at 27

[@maddyG7414]

@@hgs9880 dude we know, you keep saying it.

[@brekkangreene979]

The opposite of addiction is connection 💜 It’s beautiful to see you connecting to your Higher Self.

[@dainodawg3160]

problem is, if you get super addicted before you develop a personality (meaning when your still a kid), you dont connect with your higher self, you battle with you mind to create a higher self.

[@DiU-beldwhn]

0. .0 the higher self isn’t the “personality” or ego. It’s something that you can always access if you take the time. Were born being our higher selves and the lives we choose either bring us towards or away from it. It’s never to late to turn around

[@dainodawg3160]

@@DiU-beldwhn Trust me, im not giving up on myself, but i dont understand what you mean. Nobody is born self actualized, this is something that you acquire in life. What im pointing out is that with anything (in this case drugs) you can distract yourself from the pursuit of goals and needs. I'd imagine non addicts brains are wired to mate, feed, acomplish tasks, etc... Its my suspicion that drugs rewired my brain to demotivate and numb. Your brain (assuming your not an addict) sees a problem and thinks i need to find a solution to this. My brain sees a problem, and wants to bail out of reality. (side note, i dont want to come across as a dick, i just want to understand what you're trying to tell me)

[@MODSUN]

Brekkan Greene love this

[@voreshbo7031]

​@@dainodawg3160check out dr.Gabor maté❤

[@thefishylife6823]

The struggle is real!!!! After 20yrs of popping pills.!!!!! I'm going on 4 yrs. Clean!!

[@brandyyybabyyy436]

The Fishy Life ! Congrats to you!

[@missaMARYca]

Congratulations! Keep going, you are amazing and worth it!

[@nelidaflores4523]

amazing!!! so proud of u!!

[@adrianalyssa1121]

Amazing! Congratulations 💕💕💕💕

[@amber2735]

The Fishy Life ! CONGRATS

[@Daniel-e1q1h]

MOD SUN: I feel so lonely and lost right now. - 2019 In 1 year and 5 months, you will release 3 awesome songs called Karma, Bones and Flames. It's a MOVIE. MOD is an example of how you can really turn your life around if you dedicate yourself to your goals.

[@Jenny-tw3wh]

"Dependency on chaos" I relate so hard to that

[@HaliLaRae]

“This is not the end, time to start again” I love that. Really speaks volumes 🖤

[@kirsten9729]

This is raw. You’re doing the right thing by sharing.

[@shayward5237]

Came back to this video after your most recent tiktok I just know this version of you is so proud of who you are now mod

[@mercyorbit9351]

This is the D.A.R.E. (Drug Abuse Resistance Education) the world needs to hear.

[@surfinsilver]

mercyorbit Hello, I am building a channel based on addiction and helping others with kind words and happiness and positivity every day, in every video, I could use all the support & subscribers I can get to get the message out to people that it is possible to get clean! Check my vid out ❤️

[@jamiewilson2550]

YES MY DUDE

[@jamiewilson2550]

mod, sell this shit to the cops!!!! :)

[@cyliejeanjohnston2500]

For a long time, since I got clean, I have been saying that schools should be getting recovered addicts to give honest talks to kids, and it never happens. The issue is that people are scared of addicts, it’s as if you can catch addiction just by being around us. I think that we have a lot of knowledge to share, and the most important part of prevention is knowledge. People lie to kids and tell them that there is nothing good about drugs, and then kids think on their own “well why do all those addicts do it then?” People are so focused on trying to just tell kids that drugs are bad, nothing good comes from drugs, instead of telling the truth: drugs are like heaven on earth, they make you feel nothing and everything all at once, and it feels amazing, the first few times I did meth it was better than the best orgasm you could ever have - and we need to tell kids that, there’s a reason that people get addicted, we can’t keep lying to kids like that, because then we can tell them the truth - that it feels so good you never want to stop, and it only has to happen once to become an addict. Just like mod said, the second he tried coke he was addicted. That’s all it takes. Sorry for the tangent, but I believe so strongly in the recovered addicts being the forefront of drug prevention with kids,

[@janinegagnon7784]

“I’ve been running from the thought of becoming what is in my DNA” Damn. You are so eloquent. Keep ur head up x

[@elev8higher915]

Janine Gagnon has to look up that word😂 very true though

[@elev8higher915]

Had *

[@michellethaliaa]

I clicked on this thinking id just listen to a minute of it, watched every second. You have great communicatioin skills, and i am very proud of you.

[@MODSUN]

michelle zuniga ❤️

[@sharettebauman7311]

Same honestly. I don't usually sit through vlogs very well, but I heard every word❤

[@spideywidey100da]

yep i can never sit thru long videos but as soon as he started talking i stayed put lol

[@surfinsilver]

Hello all, I am doing my best to create a channel solely based on helping others with addiction and telling my story, IT WOULD MEAN THE WORLD FOR PEOPLE WITH LIKE MINDS TO COME SUBSCRIBE AND WATCH MY FIRST VIDEO I MADE YESTERDAY❤️ give me a chance I will upload every other day or every single day with relative videos on how addicts feel and think. Come join me if you wish✌🏼

[@KermitJaggerBand]

This was a really important video for me to see in April 2020. It was this very video and a couple of other recovery stories on KZbin that convinced me to check myself into rehab. Now I'm over 4 years sober, and work in addiction treatment now :) THANK YOU.

[@Martin-fd7gf]

I’ve never heard of him but gained huge respect for this man!

[@oak7746]

Check out his music 😁 he just dropped a new song!

[@FM_ris]

Same

[@orlalolo4585]

I never heard him either I just watched because I related to caption , but I'm about to check his music when this is over

[@dogwalkerlindsey]

His music is not very good in my opinion. But he’s a cool dude

[@orlalolo4585]

@@dogwalkerlindsey I agree I went to check out , wouldn't be my type music

[@kaseysolomon9068]

Ok when did Mod become so attractive. Do more of these. Uncut. Real. People are listening.

[@Sergio-fu7mv]

Kasey Solomon I’m so sorry, but I just gotta ask. Where are you from if that’s not too personal? Lol. Your last name is Ethiopian. So it just seems off because Ethiopians speak “Amharic” I think, and you speak English. Lol. Again, if it’s to personal feel free to not respond. I’m just a very curious being. 😭😂👌🏼

[@kaseysolomon9068]

Sergio Alcantara I’m American. When my great grandpa immigrated here from Austria, American policies made him legally change his last name to something biblical before allowing him to live here. So it stuck as Solomon.

[@710denverterp4]

Your cringe shut up

[@kaseysolomon9068]

710denverterp uR mOm iS cRiNgE

[@MrCowkids123]

I hated the drugged up version of you. This changed my whole perception on you. Stay Strong

[@carmen8958]

dude i’ve never heard anyone talk abt the eating disorder shit w this like one of the main reasons i really think i started doing drugs was bc i thought they’d make me skinnier and that sounds so shallow but like disorders like that really consume your whole brain and i was like 12, thank u for sharing that seriously i’ve always felt so fucking alone in that and one of the reasons it took me so long to get sober was i was TERRIFIED of the weight i’d gain, much respect mod❤️❤️

[@maygenmull8840]

Same I’ve battled bulimia since I was 15 I’m now 28 and I’ve been in recovery from it for 5 years I absolutely ruined my pancreas between that and being an alcoholic/addict (6 years sober on the 31st this month) the drugs took away the hungry and desire to eat so it all tied in “perfectly” being sober and in recovery for 6 years I’ve only heard 1 person share their story and in include an eating disorder so when I hear/see someone who can relate it is everything I still struggle till this day with being terrified of weight gain it’s a daily battle that never ends I have to stay vigilant

[@psyfrosity1576]

I also am terrified of gaining weight. I was put on a medication for a little while that made me gain some weight but thankfully I stopped taking it. Weight gain causes such depression for me. When I’m heavy that’s 90% what I think about all day.

[@zyonwilson7127]

@@psyfrosity1576 just remember that there’s no reason to feel shame about it. none, i hate that people go thru this because theirs no reason to feel that way luv ❤️ just know you’re not judged. beautiful soul

[@psyfrosity1576]

@@zyonwilson7127 thank you!

[@JAHLife]

Sending love your way!! I truly hope you are becoming a better person. Please know you're never alone. Try your best to understand weight is just a number. Who cares. It's about how you feel internally. Don't let the turkeys of the internet get you down love. I Love YOU!!! ❤️

[@ryantichenor5590]

You are doing what 99% of your heroes and idols were not strong enough to do. You are overcoming a charming beast and openly sharing it. This will be powerful for so many people in the scene. A lot of your heroes have lost to it, some have overcome it, but nearly zero have been real. Remember, you can’t own sobriety or success no matter how much money, influence and support you have. You rent it daily. Stay up on the payments. Much love!

[@orderofrecovery.quitdrinki6778]

"codependency on chaos" says it all. I feel this. Great share.

[@emerslancova7921]

I love your username

[@ZoeChanelll]

i’ve never seen a “celebrity” make such a raw video. new found respect for you keep going strong!! the world loves you 💜

[@ZoeChanelll]

yes. i would consider him a celebrity

[@knighttwhitet5535]

Just recently found you from your song "flames" with Avril lavigne. I started listening to your music and became a fan. I just discovered this video today. Thank you for this. Thank you for being so humble and showing that even rock stars, celebrities can feel lonely. I just celebrated 4 years clean off of Fentanyl on the 9th of February. Hope your still doing well bro and stay plugged in somewhere. Keep putting out bangers!! 🤘😁🤘

[@Ryan-yw8iz]

Same

[@fiercegrace6678]

keep going dude respect

[@laynedoe3455]

I went from being dead from fentlyl on Christmas, to having a life again today, thanks to stories like this reminding me why i got clean. So much of your music has gotten me through the last 3 months of being sober, and starting to work again. Its so exhausting and difficult, but without drugs I rediscovered my LOVE for music. Thank you for being apart of my recovery story, just ny sharing yours. Much love

[@koshadillztv]

woah powerful!!

[@Ashley__Rose]

Congrats!!! You must be so proud. 💜

[@bridgetison]

I’m so glad you’re here ❤️ this is powerful!!

[@brownshugga8295]

Layne Doshier i get mine from my dr for my fibromyalgia I don’t c that it does much just started on cbd oil it’s getting better

[@abbielavey548]

So proud of you. Keep it up, man. I know how hard that shit can be.

[@troysparks3772]

“ Money is the ONE thing that will kill a drug addict!” MODSON

[@cata3273]

isn't it obvious?????????

[@mattbower4763]

That and drugs

[@lean6am795]

@@mattbower4763 fs💀💀

[@peanutbutterisfu]

When u have money that’s how u get addicted quick.

[@sponkmcdonk3898]

Trust funds

[@JariAndMami]

"Transparency makes me feel good right now, even though it makes me cry" Yes

[@marycherry2001]

You reached me. I don't know how I landed on your video but was meant to be. Thank you.

[@deezys417]

i watched 15 min of this video and gave up nicotine after 22 years im on my 7th day just figured id say ty needed that

[@nope9745]

Deezy S Congrats bro.

[@deezys417]

​@@nope9745 yup today is day 19

[@lillianbaker2851]

Deezy S keep going bro. You got this!!

[@paigesknnr]

Congrats!!!!🎈🎊🎉

[@woskepthd646]

Pure love Jack12 just try it

[@AshleyHasADHD]

Hang in there Mod♡ I'm a recovering iv heroin & meth addict. I still attend a long term outpatient program but just had 2 years clean on Aug 25th. Sending positive vibes your way! *this too shall pass*

[@harleykrause2162]

Ashley Bishop congrats on 2 years! I’m coming up on 10 months heroin and meth free on 9/12. ❤️ keep kickin ass babe!

[@AshleyHasADHD]

@@harleykrause2162 Thanks so much!! I'm happy for you..keep on doing the right thing and congrats on your sobriety!!! One day at a time!!

[@Millie15071]

Good for you girl xxx

[@kaylafitz4753]

Keep it up!!!!! ❤️ stay strong!

[@danielwilson9724]

U mean methadone clinic? Thts my long term outpatient program

[@daniellepirtle]

You can literally see the hurt, regret, shame, guilt and utter lost in your eyes. I’ve been through it with so many people. You’re still here on this earth for a reason. Reach out. I’m rooting and praying for you. ❣️ One day at a time. Also.. team front tooth gap 🙌 I hear we’re a special breed.

[@raynalise4591]

#teamfronttoothgap aye

[@iJuanGutierrez]

daniellepirtle true front tooth gaps people are wild and free and sexy.

[@tayloralexandria581]

He’ll yea! We a beautiful breed 😌♥️

[@creampot3565]

“I was weak as fuck at that point. And I was showing the world how strong of a person I am” I got so much respect for this man

[@erica.ojibwe]

Almost 2 years clean from heroin 💜 everydays a struggle... But this struggle is a blessing 🙌💯💜

[@starandrose1]

Same here (17 mos)!!! It's definitely a struggle but I am so grateful to have the opportunity to go through this struggle. So many of us dont get this chance. Many of my close friends have lost their lives due to addiction. I'm lucky to have today and remind myself that tomorrow is not promised. Keep going and doing great things! Sending love your way and to all the struggling addicts out there!

[@MODSUN]

Erica W proud of u

[@LaurenAlmightyy]

I don't know you or Mod personally but I'm so proud of y'all. Thanks for sharing it gives people like us hope and people to look up to. I'm a recovering addict of 8 years and I've been clean for 9 months and going (opiates/heroin). I can't wait to be able to say I'm 2 years clean like you. Stay safe and stay sober, we got this🖤🖤

[@susanjacques8797]

That 2 years is a mile stone keep strong i wish you luck in your future

[@rhiana7166]

It just keeps getting easier! I have 5 years in January. Congrats keep killing it.

[@emilyward4388]

Please do more sit down videos like this! You are insanely likable

[@barreldreamz7852]

That's funny because to most people and including myself he's extremely punchable

[@jessicastollfuss7264]

@@barreldreamz7852 maybe don't be a rude ass bitch🤷🏽‍♀️

[@katiefleming304]

It's so crazy that a man who taught so many people how to love themselves was struggling so much in so many ways. Mod Sun changed my life & I had no idea how difficult his life was. No fans, Just friends. We love you Mod. You're a strong man. Go forward with sobriety and know that you have support all over the world ♡

[@auroraphoenixsky219]

katie fleming ❤️

[@meganmozeleski4126]

Life is a book. A good book is filled with happy, sad, confusing, even painful, hard to read, chapters. It can make you laugh, cry; It can evoke thoughts, and feelings you have to work through. But, you continue to read the book to the end. Life has this same effect on us. And, just like that good book, you have to always keep going. Why? Because nothing should spoil your happy ending; And you never know, someone else may want to read your book. ♡ Thank you for sharing your story. It opened up a realization into my own life, and I can't thank you enough for that. Keep on, keepin' on!! ✌💚

[@jasminemcsweeney7884]

"codependent on chaos" "I'm unapologetical about the life that I've lived because it is my life but I am apologetic for the sides of my self that I have shown to people" This is video is amazing, and raw and fantastic.

[@yebbi7291]

i just looked in the comments and saw urs while he was this exact thing, bro wtf

[@clurrtree]

All I’ve seen of you is with Bella Thorne. This video was so eloquent, in depth and insightful. I’m a therapist and I work with people who struggle with addiction etc so hearing these stories is so valuable.

[@_RavishingRaven_]

I got a tattoo of my favorite quote. *PAIN IS INEVITABLE, SUFFERING IS OPTIONAL* You got this dude..

[@marykrismanich6932]

I have the same quote tattooed on me 💓

[@jenniferborland3194]

This kind of honesty is so fucking rare. It takes a lot of strength to be this vulnerable - but there's so many people out there that need to hear that addiction & depression are illnesses, not character flaws. illnesses that they can recover from. I hope you continue to work & heal and create a life you're proud of. Be kind to yourself 💚💚💚

[@kellileann7409]

"I was codependent on chaos" I feel this.

[@tammiexoxo6823]

Omg... Me...🤟🤘👅🙋🙋🙋🙋

[@Sergio-fu7mv]

new Leaf get yo ugly ass outta here.

[@tylerdurden6350]

Wow some of yall are dicks shiit!

[@KMC1983.]

What is Chaos??

[@dawsxnofficial]

I also feel this whole heartedly

[@Noizedas]

That room is gross af. But still cool af. Just passed my four year sober mark. Best four years of my life. Also the hardest

[@giventogrow8533]

Dav Swrs ❤️ Amazing! Keep on fighting. You’re worth it!

[@iJuanGutierrez]

Dav Swrs congrats brotha!!!! can you tell me a few things you did, it will help me out greatly

[@Noizedas]

Juan gutierrez I almost had to change everything, stay busy, find some new things to distract you, couldnt go to a bar or a show for over a year without being triggered so just eventually had to find new things I like doing, surround yourself with like minded people and go to meetings. I went to two meetings a week for about three years. Now I just go once a month. Even if you don’t want to talk, just hearing people going through similar struggles helps a ton, you can do it

[@kellyr573]

Great job Dav Swrs....keep it going brother!!

[@jordynwilliams5053]

Keep going❤️I’m proud of you, it’s up from here

[@jakem6993]

I’ve lived with my boyfriend for 4yrs. He’s went through addiction. He’s 3 almost 4 years clean. He was at his lowest. This video should be everywhere on KZbin. Addiction is an epidemic. I really appreciate you doing this man. Good vibes coming your way man, you got this!

[@effy312]

currently on this video trying to help my boyfriend out with staying sober, he fell off the wagon frequently. sending love to you and your lover x godspeed

[@adrienneallen4817]

This is such an honest, raw, accurate portrayal of someone with mad talent that unfortunately became an addict. The negative effects of drugs, how impactful, how completely consuming in everyway drugs are, and how it effects you mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually -to the extreme. The level of denial, excuses, and lies you tell others and yourself, to convince yourself to continue to use, and not get clean. The all consuming pain of it all. Thank you for this mad video! I hope it helps others, and when you need reminding, helps You remember who you want to continue to be! And who you do not, want to ever be again. I hope you continue to work at your sobriety, stay clean, and if you fall -get back up!!! You are truly an inspiration, such a talent, such an amazing soul, such a pro... I look forward to your continued success, now that you are on the right path and sober. Nothing but Love and peace for you man ❤

[@michaelpothier7314]

I'm going on 2 years clean now from drugs, you are loved brotha!! Keep making amazing music and living your dream.

[@marrigrace3918]

You can do anything you set your mind to. Stay hydrated. Get good sunshine on your face. I’ve never seen any of your videos until this one but I just wanna say I respect you for this. Real respect. -just another addict

[@BeeTeaDubs]

Just another addict... Wow. Yeah. It's amazing how just a couple words can have such a heavy impact. I'm also an addict. I don't want to be anymore. I want to be where modson is today. Taking those first steps feel impossible. Withdrawal is the last thing I want to experience. I really want to try but its like I don't know how. Hopefully I can find the support, the help I need to move forward without addiction. I hope the same for you Marri.

[@carynmartin6053]

Amen, same

[@marrigrace3918]

I come from a family of addicts - we all have our vices. I went through pill addiction/self harm/alcoholism when I was 14, I was in-patient for a month and met a lot of other people my age - group therapy and guided meditation and cbd/thc helped me immensely. I experienced psychedelics 17-19 and met a hypnotherapist (I was never hypnotized, we’re just good friends and he was able to help me map my brain through conversation - lots of conversation ) I was lucky to have a mom who had also gone through addiction. My father is an alcoholic so - double whammy for the addict gene, here. I’m 25 now and I’ve been free of prescribed medication for a decade now- I still have my urges- and sometimes surges of the old feelings of how it would be to be on drugs- and the memory is enough for me now- I did it once- I experienced it and I know how it felt and now I can move on to new experiences- real experiences with my family and friends without worrying about if they see the real me- because I am the real me. I opened up to the people around me and had to be honest and just start over- reinvent the healthy you. Once you start, pay attention to your shoulders or wherever you hold your anxiety and try to mentally unwind that knot- the knot holding you back- loosen the knots- you got this, my friends. I don’t have all the answers but I’m willing to look for them with you. We addicts gotta stick together, because the people who haven’t gone through it- don’t know about it. Don’t listen to the people telling you you’re worthless- only you decide your own worth.

[@_Fluorescent_]

Danni Masters Studio: never give up hope. 12 years sober from opiates and alcohol, I can tell you they you do not have to live in pain. Sobriety truly is the gift of life. So much pain melts away when your clean. Take care and be strong. You really can do it.

[@baileydrouin]

much love and respect for you marri

[@trav3rsy]

Impossible says "Im possible" Listen to "Look Up" every day. Think i just about wore the thing out. Mod you have an old soul, shit happens and as long as you learn from it, you can only grow. Thank you for you music and everything you do, but, your purpose isnt done yet. This world needs you Mod.

[@youknow3219]

Love this

[@gracegorman1999]

I am in recovery myself. I used to get very messed up & still do a little sometimes. I love you mod sun! ❤️

[@SaraJean85]

I can see how hard it is for u to talk about drugs.. ur body is moving like its about to do a rail.. but ur eyes are clear and I hope ur words quiet the movement inside ;) it's hard but u r doing it so keep it up!

[@caseymariana3654]

Sara Jean wdym ? what do you see in his body language

[@SaraJean85]

I see someone who use to be an addict and no matter what our bodies go thru weird emotions when speaking about it.. it's easy for one to see in another the symptoms of overcoming but the body holds anxiety about it and I can see his struggles but his eyes are clear and his resolve is stronger then the ticks... that's great and soon when he talks about it.. his body will calm and in time he will be able to talk about it and not wiggle and squirm at all!! Super proud and dont know him

[@iadesigns]

@@SaraJean85 exactly. There's triggers and anxiety that comes with new sobriety.

[@alisonmcquiston8994]

You’re the first one I’ve heard talk about this codependency on chaos. I really respect you for being so honest and you deserve peace

[@qweenb.3552]

You're lonely but PLEASE dont get in no type of relationship right now! U NEED to feel all this pain.

[@amandaramalho6609]

Honestly, so true if I didn't stay single for as long as I did after trying to get sober I probably wouldn't be here anymore... I had to feel it and go through all the feelings I was always so petrified to feel.

[@moderndayentertainment5812]

What’s the deal about getting into a relationship?

[@plaidplatapus]

Raw Hip Hop time to get to know himself without any distractions.

[@julias2501]

Facts. As a codependent lover myself, I’m forcing myself to stay away from my ex and other people. (Hardest part is really staying away from my ex, I don’t feel attracted to anybody). Gotta feel these mental growing pains to change and become stronger.

[@julias2501]

Raw Hip Hop , in new sobriety you should aim to be single for at least one year. You can become addicted or co dependent on the other half and if things don’t go well it can risk a relapse.

[@lisamariegutierrez3372]

I know this is an older video but still hoping this is seen…I needed to see this, not because I suffer from addiction per sé but because I have difficulty with intimacy and personal connection in my life. I’m a chronic negative Nancy and truly truly have trouble finding positive in myself, body and personality, so anytime I come across your content it’s conveniently when I’m at a low and I sincerely feel my spirits lifted. Thank you for your authenticity, genuinely. LG

[@lorriecrow7872]

That in itself is an addiction

[@elliearmbruster9076]

I haven’t followed you or your music, but this video came up in my timeline. I am so glad it did. You are very courageous for sharing your story and I am definitely a new fan of yours now.

[@jessieswitalski7025]

I've been clean for about 170 days. Went to rehab in March and that changed my life. This is truly inspiring. Thank you for sharing your platform to talk about addiction.

[@denamullen340]

Jessie Switalski Good for you! Keep fucking with sobriety bb 💗💗

[@jessieswitalski7025]

@@denamullen340 thank you so much. I appreciate it!💞

[@amber2735]

You got this love!!💜

[@laurenturtleful]

Jessie Switalski ❤️

[@baileydrouin]

Proud of you so much!

[@amberblaze420]

wow it takes so much strength to be open about past drug addictions.. I am extremely proud of you mod. much love bb

[@cobain719]

You rocked tonight in Calgary. You're personality & energy is awesome. You would definitely make a great friend w a great heart.glad you sobered up. You're a good guy 🖤💚

[@Angel___333]

Why did it kinda break my heart when Mod said “remember me like this” and did peace signs and smiled 😭😭

[@HiHi-qd8ki]

cause after hearing his story you want him to live on

[@kristenburk3178]

He just opened up every dark, scary, vulnerable secret and shared with us his truths. Mad respect dude. Love you.

[@donaldlump7793]

"Had this desire to be outside reality" fck bro i felt that 💔

[@whitneystone9575]

Fuck ya! I felt That. Us addicts

[@chronicallybriana]

I don't know much about Modsun as a musician, but I give him major props and mad respect for putting this out and allowing himself to be that raw and emotional. I bet this has already helped so many people and will continue to do so. I like to weigh the cost/benefit of any decision, the positive effects vs. the consequences. I can't see many negative consequences of him sharing this, it's only going to bring positive change

[@CleeTorres_]

“Attracted to chaos” is by far the greatest thing I’ve ever heard. That puts SO much into perspective!

[@mohammadn9134]

@Otie Jason may or may not be revolutionary, i dont know if ur an addict , but i am . and what i can say is acctually that sentence is relatable, ive allways been attracted to things that i know is destructive and despite knowing its not good for me i still do it. so in other words attracted to chaos makes sense to me.

[@maxwellgibson8019]

@Otie Jason You're in the wrong place. Go find some other video to spread your hate.

[@abbybrockhaus2644]

gained soooo much respect for you. completely raw and real.

[@caridadfernandez9272]

Thank you. Its good to know i am not alone. You deff helped me, Its so hard & no one understands how real depression/ mental health & addiction can be. You know what your doing yet still do it.

[@dravonthatcher9185]

I was sober for 3 years.. during covid I've relapsed hard. I'm sitting here with a black eye and sore as shit after getting jumped at a party. I'm a musician as well and never realized the co dependancy on chaos. After being jumped I felt better... I was happy to be attacked by people. I love you for this mod 🖤 2 days without drugs and alcohol now dope sick in my bedroom. I'm not going back to that lifestyle. I'm going to suppress my insecurities and actually start putting my music out. Thank you, you potentially saved my life 🖤🖤

[@silenzebeats5409]

Keep going man, you got my support🙏🏼

[@Kayda-wz2ms]

Stay positive, Stay busy to keep your mind off the other things, keep it up , you got this, you've done this before. One Day At A Time. 👍🙏

[@ryanharrington5807]

Keep it up man i support you you got it💪 put that energy into your music instead

[@Cr0nkR]

Sick as fuck right now man so sick of this shit

[@gaijingabber1056]

a week later, how have you been? i pray your doing well, even if you arent, its never too late to change, i havent yet...

[@joshlomax9685]

Damn homie. I’ve battled alcohol my whole life I’m 38 now. I watched this whole thing and I can honesty say I’m at my wits end with alcohol. Ur awesome dude keep up the good work with sobriety and your awesome message of peace in ur music. I really want to change old habits and not drink. Much love Brutha. Stay positive ✌️. I’m sure ur fan base can relate.

[@samdaylighttattoo8018]

My ex boyfriend also had body image issues surrounding his cocaine addiction. He would make subtle comments about being chubby as a kid, and how he "looked so good now" but he was losing weight due to his addiction. You're not alone, and we're all proud of you.

[@XIIIXans]

shoutout to everyone that had no idea who this was until you randomly got this in your recommend

[@lucabelarbi3633]

Damn😂

[@AceXwilD]

Dats me.

[@kgbstudio]

still dont know who this is, and at 10 mins I stopped it..

[@kellymckinnon7085]

I knew him. Just not his story

[@tsivilsඞ]

@@kgbstudio ok so ur ignorant and disrespectful? Is that what I was supposed to take away from ur comment? I'm genuinely confused why u felt tbe need to comment that. u stopped the vid. Ok? but why are you bragging about it like not listening to someone's story is cool?

[@kenzie3279]

I love you mod. I wish my brother could have heard your story. He died of a drug overdose in 2016 at 28. I miss him. Thank you for your honesty.

[@Purplepixie42]

Kenzie I’m sorry for your loss. I lost someone I considered a brother last year to drugs.

[@aprilgeewhiz3814]

On June 29th I celebrated my 14th year of sobriety. I knew I’d either die or get sober and thankfully I chose sobriety. Here’s to 14 more years! Congratulations to everyone who has managed a day, a week, a month or any time. It’s worth it!

[@ladydi-lynn]

Congratulations! 26 years sober! 🙏

[@heathergruber7615]

Being in recovery can be a long road out of hell. I am going on 2 years sober, and your right .. It is one day at a time ..having gratitude for every day .. I am happy to have this life. I am greatful for you and your Recovery story and you using your platform to try and reach out to those in the middle of their battle with addiction.

[@ghostfacethereal]

I am so glad you chose to use your platform for this! I want to do this very soon. I’ve been in recovery for 5 years. I was an addict since I was 12. I was 25 when I decided enough is enough. EVERYONE NEEDS TO TELL THEIR STORIES. You never know if it reaches that one person who needs it the most! Much love 💚, peace ☮️ and light 🌟✌️🔮👽💚💚

[@diamondsngunns88]

Sarah Williamson 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽💜💜💜💜💜🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🌙🌙🌙🌙🌙

[@auroraphoenixsky219]

Sarah Williamson I too have a similar story.. love and light 🌅

[@amandawingz658]

With all the political bullshit happening with celebrities and America this video is refreshing and the most genuine thing I have seen/heard in a while. You made my cry and I'm not that person. I have a close family member who is an addict and so many things things you've mentioned he has also reiterated. Please please please keep going. One day at a time. Live. Love. Friends, family, and fans love you and want you to live and be happy and healthy.

[@emilyarmstrong5266]

I've watched this video so many times and it still brings me too tears each time. I'm so proud of you mod and I'm so glad you have started a journey. We all have battles and you sharing your journey will help so many others 💚

[@MrAdamChristopher]

love the honesty. wish more people would talk like this

[@JanoyCresva]

too bad he's doing drugs again. It was nice while it lasted.

[@valleyofashes]

@toxic avenger so true but the reality is, overcoming it has only made you that much stronger and more wise since you cleaned yourself up and came out the other side. So many people just want a reason to feel bigger than others but you know the truth so fuck them ✌🏼

[@valleyofashes]

@@JanoyCresva is he really?

[@angelbrumfield6134]

@toxic avenger I've been off of heroin for 12 years. I have scars on my hands people still scoff at me when they notice those scars. I work in customer service and a lot of merchandise goes through my hands. It's gotten easier dealing with the judgment but it does still affect me. I know what those scars represent. I made it out, I beat something 95% of people don't, I've known loss people I love didn't make it out, I've gained compassion,understanding and strength by way of the stupidest decisions, I appreciate life because I faced death and overcame. So people judge those scars but those scars remind me of second chances, faith, needless loss, empathy for those still living it, my scars remind me I am fortunate. When people judge me I remember I once looked at addicts through eyes of judgment myself and pray they never gain understanding the way I did and instead gain wisdom through education.

[@ShallowApple22]

@toxic avenger you get tarred for life they fail to see the journey your on and the strength it takes to fight your demons everyday but as long as you know who you are and your worth the battles half won. You got this

[@juliakalogeropoulos4772]

Rarely do I comment, however, Modsun your words have transformed me. Thank you for being your authentic self and exposing me to ideas and ways of thinking that never reached me. Thank you for making me realize that I need to allow myself a chance for the future. Thank you for living and continuing to live and preaching your path of life. I admire your strength, courage, and optimism. You have truly moved my life and way of thinking for the better. Thank you.

[@MODSUN]

Julia K love u

[@zulemazahir666]

So happy to see more people coming out about addiction. End the stigma/Stop demonizing addiction 2k19 Edit: good luck to all my fellow mentally ill addicts out there.🖤

[@jessicayoung6981]

Same! I am so proud to see people being open about their addictions and recovery!

[@RoYeah]

MOD you're a ray...not even, A BLAST of sunshine in a very dark world, and whether you read this or not it doesn't matter. I wanted to say that this video found me completely out of nowhere while I'm on my own strange journey to kick bad habits and gain some normality in my life. I've watched a couple of videos where you've touched upon addiction, perspective on life, and such and these words, especially "I'm not regressing I'm progressing" from your interview with Finn are stuck on a loop in my head. I feel like something beyond my understanding sent these videos to me to tell me that all this bad shit can be dealt with. You're such a genuine, down-to-earth person and I wish you nothing but the best in life. May the universe forever smile upon you and on those you love.

[@jules9266]

i love u mod, you make this world a better place

[@aliciagergely3883]

The blonde hair suits u u look hot keep it short too looks great

[@hgs9880]

everybody wants to be Cobain so badly its incredible.

[@mollyfoxxx]

HGs doesn’t look anything like Kurt’s hair. His was long and straight and certainly not this blonde. At least he’s decided to get sober before he *became* another Kurt Cobain.

[@hgs9880]

@@mollyfoxxx i didnt mean physicly i meant how he wanted to die at 27 he said it himself he was following a bad example of stars who died at 27

[@cynthiabrenhaug6696]

I love you modsun, I've always looked up to you and nothing will change my view about you 😗🖤🖤

[@sharonbates3227]

Just started getting depressed and thinking about drinking, after a year of being sober, then I came across this possibly caught my attention because mod sun is pretty damn cute, and made me think twice about relapsing

[@Ittsxan]

This got to me mod, I just hope u know you are loved by many. You are the definition of happiness to me. Your music, books, attitude changed so many lifes. Ever since I found you 5 years ago, YOU have been there for me during every low. Thank you a million times. Happy 110. You a rockstar, luv u🧡

[@StephiNicole619]

This. 100 percent

[@psychedelicate]

remember these moments when you think about relapse bb. stay strong!

[@MODSUN]

perrywinx ❤️

[@crazychic451]

I remember I went to a concert 9 years ago to see Breathe Carolina, you were one of the bands to perform and I remember you almost fell or did fall from the stage. You looked very drunk/high. I noticed the audience was quite worried about you. I'm glad you managed to leave that life behind and now getting better.

[@crazyguitarist12499]

this videos still saves my life. i watched it the day it came out and im watching it again now. Mod your story is so many peoples story. I suffered from alcohol dependency while i was touring, and it was a toxic cycle. I also suffer from an eating disorder. Cannabis has truly saved my life and im so so so so so happy that you are able to use this amazing medicine and get better. To all the addicts out there please read this. IT GETS BETTER ONLY IF YOU ARE TRULY READY TO CHANGE AND GET BETTER. YOU CAN GET BETTER. YOU MATTER, AND YOUR PRECESNCE IN THE WORLD DOES IN FACT MAKE IT A BETTER PLACE!