All 10 Personality Disorders | Overview & Symptoms

[@christinewatson1989]

People need to understand that it is normal for the traits listed to apply to you. People with legit personality disorders have these traits to the EXTREME and it has a HUGE impact on their ability to live a normal life and maintain normal relationships. When someone claims to have a personality disorder because they have a FEW of the aforementioned traits, it is disrespectful to people who actually struggle with them in a very serious way. If you truly do have a personality disorder, trust me, you KNOW IT from a very young age.

[@MissyCrowley]

No you don't...it's often worse than that. I am many with me just assumed we were brain damaged,unfit for life and stupid. My mother used to explain clearly to me that I wasn't as good a person as others...I believed her...kids do that The teambased thorough diagnose (got that twice) with extreme results really freed me a bit and I could finally cut my mother out of my life for good In her symptoms she so clearly describes she could be me! But I would not have been able to express it "Liners" with a serios diagnose tend to learn all that there is to know about. the condition, it's part of the symptoms. High functioning "liners" often gets to be experts on what Borderline is...but that intellectual knowledge does not really help.the symptoms since they are totally emotionbased, has nothing to do with knwledge or intelligence. We can not help ourselves through that if you know what I mean? Then the DBT teaches you even more about how to verbalise the condition even more We have to LEARN our symptoms and the techniques handle them. Nothing comes natural in the relating to "the world" for us It's not an easy life even if you master the ways to ease the worst anxiety, panic and often suicidal behaviour (Liners are more likely to commit suicide than any other psychiatric diagnose) because it will always be there. You have to be strong because you have to handle these symptoms all your life. But most of us we are or become (must for survival) very strong and remorseful individuals. Believe it or not! If we wasn't strong we would never have survived our childhoods :) But I often say: -It fekkin sux old mans balls to be me! It does...it really does. But this is who I am and I just have to play the cards I was dealt

[@katiejuby]

i've recently found out to be diagnosed with chronic depression and ocd, but i was not even aware of the ocd until entered into a mental facility, and they pointed out my counting habits, need for orderliness and perfection, and a habit of following inane superstitions out of some irrational paranoia of what would happen if i didn't. my ocd isn't severe enough to really interfere with my life although. so i cannot say it had that big of an impact on my life. still, i must point out i was never aware of any of my disorders until i was much older, and in the ninth grade. when i was younger i merely thought i was just an odd child because i was raised to embrace that everyone was different and thought nothing of my feelings. i simply assumed people felt the same way at times. so what i am saying is that not all people with personality disorders know it from a young age. some even develop one overtime.

[@RichWitchBitch]

Missy Crowley Im looking for people to converse with who are diagnosed with BPD who can help give me insight possibly to my own daughter's diagnosis. I feel very responsible in that she was raised in a way that had i to do it over again would not have happened. While I did my best she suffered at the hands of her very alcoholic father and my leaving him for a woman/ 15 yr. relationship. While I take ersponsibility that began 13 years ago and no progress has been made. She does use everything to her advantage. I often have said that I gave her more ammunition by arming her with books and therapy. There has to be a way through this that we can all work together in. However she is not in therapy and has recently went off meds again. She has good days but there is an underlying energy of 'mom is the enemy. i love mom more than life. mom is the enemy'. i have forever rescued her and then lectured to high heaven with resentment. i need answers.

[@wishinevermetyou]

Carla Curlee I'm diagnosed with BPD and I can absolutely assure you that I had good childhood. Neither of my parents abused me in any way, but a person can develop a personality disorder without having to have been abused or something similar. My parents got divorced when I was only 1,5 years old and at that time it's very important for the child to receive a lot of attention - and I didn't. Furthermore I've experienced my father yell and throw with things when he gets angry. But he never laid a hand on me or my siblings. So what I'm basically trying to say is that it's not necessarily your fault your daughter developed BPD. You might have given her the best upbringing you could and she would still have developed BPD. One criteria for BPD that is often not included in videos like this, is that in order to develop BPD one must be a very emotional person. But I think you daughter should start in therapy, it will help a lot I can assure you. I've been in therapy for almost a year now and I've really come far. DBT is the answer. I really hope your daughter gets better!

[@BloodOrangeSun]

Curlee Jean here

[@ldscyclist]

It's not that I don't like people ... I just feellll better when they're not around. ok ..back to my cave. :-)

[@originalmetalman9430]

me

[@joseeallard6696]

I admire the way you honnestly relate on personnality traits that most people wouldn't even try to question themselves about. I also appreciate when you specify that some personnality disorders may look like some mental illnesses like bipolar disorder (wich I'm living with) but are different, and the way you tend to stay objective about it all. Keep up with the good work and thanks for the awareness you provide about these issues. :-)

[@spectrumofconsciousness-waja]

Yes, I too have alot of respect for you, i appreciate your honesty and it helps me to be more honest with myself, i relate to much of what you share. Can you comment on or do a video that explains the causes or the specific traumatic experiences that led to these 'disorders' or is that too personal?

[@KrejzolskieFilmy]

I am always against it when people who are not specialists try to educate the rest about mental disorders because most of them give information that are misleading and often even untrue. But the way you do it makes me happy. It's far more professional, even if 15 minutes is too little time to explain everything. Thank you, keep doing your thing!

[@TheTwistedStory]

I am currently studying for my psychology final that covers personality disorders, psychological disorders, and so forth. I found this video to be incredibly helpful in distinguishing the differences. Thank you!

[@Emptiness512]

I think you are beautiful in sharing these inner characteristics of yourself..it takes a lot of courage and i commend you for it...this is helpful for me in trying to understand my brother's disorder...so i thank you for taking the time out to do this

[@JUNKYARDOGvideos]

I have borderline personality disorder, I find I get in arguments with people for no reason all the time. people like me for a while then they universaly turn on me. as seems to be the way with borderline. I have very few close friends, which I don't mind, I'm no big fan of humans. the avoidant type sounds a lot like me too.

[@RichWitchBitch]

My daughter has BPD. Its the hardest thing to deal with I have ever experienced. She has a nine year old daughter. Very difficult situation for us all. My biggest desire is for her to accept diagnosis and continue therapy. Ive no way of convincing her of how much the medication does work. (taluda) she prefers to eat xanax and drink sigh. All i want is to find a way to co exist and maintain love and joy with her and not the extremes that I face nearly weekly. I seem to be the one person she attacks ..she says im the only person that wont leave no matter what so she feels more 'comfortable' to attack me. its the hugest love hate relationship i have ever seen (on her part toward me). I wish you had insights. I wish someone had insights that comes from "her space" of thinking/feeling etc. My daughter is 31 and still functions like a 15 year old . I dont want to do anything but help support and make life better for her (codependent in me as well as MOTHER). But there are times when I want to run away never to be found by her again. I infact did do that six years ago just after my partner passed away. She somehow being also diagnosed narcissistic disorder (over/attention seeking) made it about her. I get no support, no consideration, no respect, she expects and demands control and loyalty as well as to be taken care of . if she goes to jail because she's drunk driving she expects to be bailed out. having the disorder do you think it best to continue life this way or is there some way that from 'her' perspective (the bpd's perspective) that I could get insight into. You are the first person I have ever addressed who also has the disorder and willingly admits it.

[@JUNKYARDOGvideos]

sorry to hear that Carla I hope your family finds the good side of it `i`e the creative side all the best.

[@berryfreaxx6915]

JUNKYARDOGvideos I'm Borderline too... I have to fight alone..

[@iSugarHeart]

Berry Freaxx worst part is that it looks like you have everything together. But you dont.. you're expected to function in life normally but you just cant.

[@MissSindorei]

also borderline here.. diagnosed, I hate having to deal with people, everything I say seems to be portrayed as rude

[@timothygilbert1979]

your level of introspective thought is fascinating - must be cathartic to be able to think so openly and deeply about yourself. kudos

[@killingjoke3366]

Agree with Eric Crawford. I was professionally diagnosed with two psychiatric illnesses but yes, I am human and as most people, I feel and think all kinds of things. That doesn't mean I have all personality disorders or psychiatric illnesses. If this person seriously had all of these disorders, she would, in my opinion, not be able to survive in this world.

[@billejoel4808]

Hello Autumn. I had an experience yesterday where I saw a person at our local movie theater, literally transform from a kind person in one second to an extremely aggressive almost possessed person. It was a very shocking experience to me as I had to restrain this person in order to avoid damage to himself and others nearby, while his parents were witnesses. This lead me to try and understand more of what is going on in the minds of persons and eventually, this lead me here. Thank you for your enlightening knowledge about these topics.

[@selflike]

This is beautiful. Thank you for the time and energy that it took to compile and present such an easy to understand overview. The science of mental illness is not empirical in nature, which is why research and funding are so non-existent, it is theoretical and treatments that are found continue to be improved as lives are improved. This isn't better gas mileage or even cancer identification. This is defining the undefinable. Thank you again, for your honesty about your application to what related to you, for your attention to detail that made it easy to follow and learn from, and for your courage to speak up and out about Personality Disorders. You have my support. Keep up the good work.

[@l6318]

Hey, just wanted to swing by and say thanks for making this video. I have bipolar disorder, but I've recently become interested in learning more about personality disorders (about which I know very little) because I have a friend who who has borderline. BUT!! I also wanted to say please don't take to heart the ignorance of some of the comments here made by people who think they know more about you than you do. Those comments and the people who made them are backwards. AND ESPECIALLY: It really breaks my heart to see so many trans-phobic comments, especially when you said that any kind of criticism can be difficult for you. Rude, intrusive and inappropriate questions or comments about your gender identity and gender expression are, in my book, simply not OK. People who lack empathy should be ignored. Thanks again and take care! -LB

[@ukatheism1]

This sounds more like a college freshmen who takes abnormal psychology 101 and self diagnose themselves with everything they read because they identify with every emotion out there, (but it's about extremes and duration which is why the DSM has criteria). Everyone has emotions, so that's why people can identify with a definition, but it is a much different picture clinically. I have my doubts about her having all 10 personality disorders because there's too many contradictions and distinctions between each. Having everything under the sun is more likely a red flag for hypochondriasis or just attention seeking.

[@breklein3338]

Or maybe she is just a bigger person than most people and can ADMIT to her faults. Everyone has multiple flaws....most don't admit it though.

[@ukatheism1]

What ??? All humans have faults and flaws. It is normal to have emotions. It is fine to admit that it is normal to have these feelings and emotions. In most cases it is healthy to admit we have these emotions and feelings at the appropriate times. The problem is that no one can have all of these disorders, They can have some that overlap, but there are some that are incompatible with each other. That is why I say it is somebody who does not understand the difference between abnormal and normal. Most likely a person with hypochondriasis or histrionic disorder who pretentiously acts out the other disorders to seek attention whether it be negative or positive attentions.

[@breklein3338]

She never said she had these disorders. In fact, if you PAID ATTENTION, she explicitly said she didn't. I wouldn't call that pretentious either. She is not pretentious. I think those that misperceive or interpret negativity in everything they see are the ones that seek attention or that suffer from mood disorders like depression...... If you could use your judgement accurately and if you had good judgement at that, you would be able to see that she is trying to relate to everyone and to people that may identify with these disorders. Everyone has some degree of each of these disorders, but not necessarily the disorder, because like you just said-it takes extreme interference & disruption in daily life to receive these diagnosis.

[@breklein3338]

In addition, hypochondriasis was removed from DSM IV. It is called illness anxiety and somatic symptom disorder that you are looking for. However, she does not have any of those symptoms. She is not adamant about having a PHYSICAL illness nor is she adamant about having any illness at all and she is not misattributing normal bodily sensations.

[@ukatheism1]

***** I do not think it is appropriate to say to someone who has one of these personality disorders that a normal person can relate or identify. It is like telling a crack addict you can relate to their addiction, an amputee that you can identify with not having a limb, or mother who lost their only child and never having any yourself. In each case, the grieving mother, the crack addict, and amputee will be understandably upset if you say you can identify with them and not have lived a day in their shoes. She gets a pass because she is young and naive.

[@lucheeese]

To clear out, you simply can't have all of these disorders at once, if you meet the criterias for one, you're bound to exclude yourself from another. Most people can identify traits from themselves in some symptoms of the whole disorders, this definitely doesnt mean we're all within the spectrum. I think you mean to not claim having any of these, and it that case you should be a bit more careful with wording "they very much apply to me." :) That being said and aside from that, I think these videos are good. From a fellow schizotypal!

[@EnchantingWings1]

But you can have a mix of different personality disorders - that is what is called Personality Disorder Not Otherwise Specified. You can have a mix of some, but not all.

[@lucheeese]

I know Natalia. My point being you can't have all at once. Different disorders, different symptoms, meaning if you have symptoms from one you're bound to be excluded from another, as the symptoms naturally differ, hence different diagnosis.

[@bekahhwatsonxx5456]

Em just saying I think she knows what personality disorders she has she's the one who's been tested for it and knows herself not you so don't judge if you don't know

[@witchf4ce310]

She's describing how she relates to them and how much. I'm personally fine with that being borderline.

[@KnowledgeBoutique]

McBirdsong This is untrue. Although some disorders appear to directly condradict others, you must take into account the occilating and cycling effects of these diagnoses. BPD would probably be the umbrella example. As you may know, when these illnesses are left untreated, they metastasize and can morph into symptoms which meet ctiteria for a "new" diagnosis on this spectrum. I would suffest you refer to your DSM 5 to note both the overlap of diagnostic and common co-existing pathology criteria. I hope this helps

[@imck76]

wow. you are so authentic and concise. this video is loaded with direct info, and it most helpful. It is a gift. I thank you!

[@simonebittencourt8251]

Autumn, congratulations for the video! It is surely very informative and interesting. I remember my Psychiatric Nursing lessons in college and had never had these descriptions so clear and well explained. Here I found it and thank you for that very much. Besides the content, I want to thank you for the great honesty you invested in this video. The examples you gave help a lot to understand the many faces of these issues. You are so insightful and articulate and it is quite remarkable from you to share your own experiences in a way we can be educated about and understand you better. Your deep understanding of emotions is incredible as well the clarity you have of your own self. This is the first time I came in contact with your work here and got so impressed and really touched. You are so sincere and authentic, qualities really very rare to find nowadays. What you do is really admirable. By sharing your own perspective of these disorders, you take others out of isolation, you bring validation, and social acceptance. I have always believed that the best way to understand a person is by listening her personal experience, her emotional essence. As you pointed out, you live many of these symptoms, and there is nobody better than you to translate what they really mean in a person`s life. I got very touched by your video. Also, you have this extraordinary face that expresses a lot of radiance. Your voice is pleasant. Your presence is powerful. Thank you really. I speak from my heart. You deserve all my admiration and compliments. Forgive me, for having written so much, but I really wanted to leave a comment about the impression you left in me through your video. I wish you the very best wherever life takes you and that you find people who respect you for who you are, your essence, your struggles and accomplishments. You said that you feel as you have a bad inferiority complex, but believe me, you are in fact, a very strong and inspiring person. You should be proud of yourself in so many ways... I could write to you much, much more, but I do not want to take too much of your time. I am motivated to watch your others videos, so I will come back to leave more comments, if you do not mind. A last thing, forgive me for my broken English. This is my second language and I am still learning. With all sincerity Autumn, I liked you a lot!

[@niamhart221]

I am not looking for a self diagnosis. I myself have been diagnosed with mild Autism as a child. I don't have a personality disorder at all but when Autumn explained Avoidant Personality, I was in tears. Because all those traits are what I am going through!

[@oohkillem872]

Okay. This is going to seem harsh to some people, but I think that many of these traits can be found in almost all people. I know that they can become so strong that they become medical conditions, but it kind of aggravates me when people self diagnose themselves because they can relate to the symptoms some times. Again no hate is being given here, so I'd ask for none in return; all nice conversation here.

[@LifeisaBeautifulting]

Thanks for saying this , I thought there was something wrong with me because a lot of these characteristics fit me . These things are hard to self-diagnose , I could only relate to 1 thing for each disorder (except for cluster C)

[@creatorofpizza]

not really. the paranoid disorder that I believe I have, most people actually don't believe that everyone is out to get them or always have their guard up

[@alex3078]

yes I agree but the one of the main reason why its a disorder is that its something that can go out of hand or just something you may not be able to control all too well

[@drekaflugan]

Well the thing is, lot of people fit some of these, but to truly be a personality disorder, it has to interrupt your life on a much bigger scale, and have lasted since childhood. Also I think they are chronic, which means they will never truly go away, just get more manageable. For example I relate so much to every single point about Avoidant PD, but I do not think I have it, just that I relate to it because I have/had really bad social anxiety and low self esteem. I think self diagnosing can be helpful, for example if I would wrongly think I have AVPD and start seeking out help for that, but find out I actually have social anxiety and/or something else, then I would find out faster. And even if you are wrong then it's likely you have something similar, and even if you don't get help from a professional you can at least find some advice online on how to deal with aspects of your problems. Because people even with the same mental illness can have different symptoms, what's most important is which symptoms are making your life the hardest and what to do about them. So you can for example have the symptom of extremely low self esteem and start working on that, and it will do you good no matter which illness you would have. But yeah there are also bad points about self diagnosing especially if you would self medicate and get the wrong medication. And even psychologists can diagnose wrongly and mess up at times, scary stuff. I may have gotten some stuff wrong I am no professional and English is not my first language

[@AlexLaPanda]

The difference between showing these traits and actually having the disorder(s) is that the disorder is a pervasive pattern that affects every aspect of your life. These symptoms are just the diagnostic ones - there are far more to these. I have BPD, btw.

[@achelkyle1646]

Hi Autumn! I haven't quite seen all of your videos, but I'm getting close. First of all, I just wanted to say I admire and respect your bravery. Recording these informative videos and putting yourself out there for all the world to see requires incredible bravery. I haven't had the pleasure of personally meeting you, but from what I've seen, you have a lot of knowledge, hope, and humor to offer to the mental health community. I have DID, BPD, PTSD, GAD NOS... finding you and Silence Within Me has really helped. I don't feel so alone, so thank you. You're AWESOME GIRLY and I'm so very grateful!

[@SuperMiley1994]

Im avoidant personality disorder and social anxiety

[@GetWellSoonR.E.M.]

I have paranoid schizophrenia myself and im a 15 year old transsexual mtf. I have not transitioned yet. Its horrible but im glad i have someone whos relatable. :) u have a new subscriber

[@LaraSchilling]

Classic Borderlines. I am one. It was the only logical answer to my mental state. (Now I notice what an oxymoron that statement was...) The self-destructive component was extremely prevalent before I forced my parents to let me take medication for the inner sufferings. When your parents were in such utter denial for so many years about your mental state, you sometimes need to throw yourself in there. Of course, it took a year of therapy before meds were even an option. There is no way I would feel ok without medication.

[@jacksonfrazier24]

This is one of the better educational videos about personality disorders I've seen on this site. A lot of videos don't answer my questions but this one left me with no more further questions; I can now firmly grasp all the concepts behind these disorders. Great job.

[@worldpeace8744]

Remember that no matter who you are, you are perfect, otherwise you wouldn`t be here. The universe is a perfect system, and you are a part of it. Society is a very imperfect and sick system, so never judge yourself from a societal perspective, look at yourself from a universal perspective, because thats whats real. Society is only manmade and mostly bullshit. Dont let others judge you or tell you whats wrong if it doesn`t make sense to you, listen to your own heart, and question everything around you, including what im saying. This world wont see any real peace, justice, morality, unity or love unless we change ourselves. The mind is the root to all the problems we experience; fear, hate, sadness, confusion, aggression etc all stem from the mind. We are being controlled by our own minds, but we dont need to. To stop being a slave to the mind and society we have to learn how life really Works. Google *Truth Contest* and read *The Present*, its the most important document on earth and it will change mankind when enough people reads it.

[@DoodieSmoothie]

+orphanslayer69 Don't tell him/her to grow up. What she said makes sense. This is the truth. The thruth that is hard to imagine, but we are self-destructive in so many ways.

[@AB-lt2pg]

The universe is not a perfect system. It's random, chaotic and unpredictable. We too, are far from perfect as a society BECAUSE we are imperfect as individuals.

[@catherinejuliano749]

Hi, I just wanted to say thank you for this video. It was extremely helpful to see the 10 d/o's laid out within the three categories. Not only was this video helpful in an educational sense but clinically it is important to unconditionally accept others in hopes that various personality traits do not express themselves in a way that is harmful to the self or others. Beautifully done and easy to connect with, thank you!

[@Yves_Victory]

You're a good women, you know more than others which I can respect deeply.

[@wild333ful]

I thought this was very organized and great for a novice in psychology! I have been reading books on psychology for years though, and a Personality Disorder has to show an intense, pervasive and disruptive effect on daily, work, family activities. I have many traits of the personality disorders, but finished school and am currently working therefore, it seems strange I might have one of these... I think many job changes and difficulties at work (which I have definitely have, come to think of it) are a sure sign of the validity of the disorder(s). Hmmm not sure if I really have a PD or not but this video layed it all out, so I can go forward and look more into it. So well done Autumn!! Please give yourself more credit and have more confidence, because you really owe it to yourself for being incredibly fearless and it's okay to bask in your own glory sometimes. Having a lower self-esteem is something that with practice can be overcome and amplified, I want everyone to give themselves that watched this video a big hug and really say "I appreciate myself," because in this world there isn't enough of that! Take care... :)

[@teresawilliams1888]

Autumn, this was a great video. How do I get a transcript? Thank you!

[@AutumnAsphodel]

Thank you! :) Transcripts to all my videos can be found on my website. You can look in the description of each video on KZbin for a direct link to the article on my website. Here is this video: autumnasphodel.com/?p=129

[@bobbot2881]

+Autumn Asphodel What about not making eye contact and talking to someone and looking away and make eye contact for a second and look away 90 degrees? What about letting someone always having their way? Like I would go to get my kids and my sister-in-law would promise the kids something and my daughter would be upset and crying and I would let her stay. Someone would annoy me like this crackhead would come up to borrow money for crack and this went on for months.

[@kenchappakenchappa5192]

bob bot sex

[@mariaashbrook721]

thank you. I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder because they didn't want to diagnose me any further since I wasn't of age. watching your video at first I I had no idea what the diagnosis ment and why they diagnosed me with it. and now I do. Watching your video going over all the symptoms and all the disorders it makes sense now. and it's scary to realize that I see some of myself in the A group as well as B group. This video helped me understand myself in a way I didn't think was possible. So for that thank you so much.

[@danjackson7758]

(Odd): Paranoid Schizoid Schizotypal (Dramatic): Antisocial Borderline Histrionic Narcissistic (Anxious): Avoidant Dependent Obsessive-compulsive

[@smellamyblake8352]

I remember one book I read on personality disorders came up with a way to remember them: the weird(paranoid, schizoid, schizotypal), the wild(antisocial, borderline, histrionic, and narcissistic) and the worried(avoidant, dependent, obsessive-compulsive).

[@nancyvega1785]

Your honesty is to be admired! Thank you for your vulnerability.

[@Redflowers9]

I'm not going to claim to have any personality disorder, because that's pointless, but I will say that I find most people boring and animal-like, living without any control over what they do, and being open is like giving my feelings to dogs that just want to dominate and be top of the pack. For this reason, I spend most of my time in my room, trying to scrape up the motivation to pursue things that don't need a lot of relationship building, or long term interaction. I have empathy for those in pain, but a lot of people are just boring animals with a shameless lack of control over their life.

[@ChinaDragonGirl]

It's very similar for me, unlike you I perceive people as shapeless and formless shadows who are just walking around and barking without knowing what they're actually doing. I prefer being alone but I feel intense loneliness from time to time. I was diagnosed with schizoid depressive personality disorder and I honestly feel relieved not to be emotionally dull and stupid for no reason and to be judged for thus. Unless you don't have any social or personal problems resulting from your condition, it shouldn't be a big problem but you can consider talking to a consellour or therapist.

[@Redflowers9]

CrimsonMeme Thanks, I'll definitely give that a try. I try my hardest to avoid raising people's expectations. Even this message is hard to type, because I want to genuinely thank you without provoking expectations, not that you have any. I spend too much energy on avoiding intimacy, repeating the god send question "what am I doing next? ", and then I make mistakes, and I'll get really angry with people who push it on me, females tend to do this, but they can't help being emotional creatures, like I can't afford to care about them anymore. When it gets too much, I just adopt another identity where I can avoid having my emotions controlled. It's not multiple personality, because I know what I'm doing, it's very subtle and most of the time, socially acceptable, but hard work. It will be a personality that I've seen off TV or someone in real life, that I know no one else will know. I remember doing that as far back as when my mother was screaming her heart out at me over any trivial excuse she could find, like I sort of became Simba from the Lion King; for some reason it just gave me some mental space. My mother hated me, she wanted to control every single thing I did, endless harsh criticisms and a lot of them were lies, and all her numerous partners got a slice as well. She poisoned her ex husband's dog just because he disagreed with her. I'm sure she's given me a fear of intimacy, but since then, I've just been filling the void with as much stimulation as I can afford. I meditate to find peace without relationships. How do you deal with your condition?

[@ChinaDragonGirl]

***** You're welcome, please don't feel pressured or forced to respond to it and only do so if you actually feel like it. Don't worry about provocations and expectations, I won't get offended and neither will I therefore offend or attack you. I'll try my best to properly write these things. Of course I can't say I understand you as I did not experience the things that happen to you and as we perceive and handle experiences all differently, I won't be able to tell you exactly what to do. Reading your text about your mother remembers me on my situation with my aunt. I come from a chinese household and like it's common, studies and good grades stand before everything else and was the most important thing. I lived with my aunt for about two years and it probably emotionally mutiliated me as she was verbally very abusive and partly hit me out of her anger at me and at everything. Well she obviously hated me but she pretended before my mother that she would just want to best for me, which my mom believed as it was her sister that said thus to her. As for today I can't directly feel the effect but obviously it's there, maybe unconciously. If a person loses a leg but doesn't think of that, the leg wouldn't come back. I don't guilt my mom but I do hate my aunt. It's a lot anger and aggression I harbour which results in potential self harm or harm to others or potentially suicide/murder (which I have thought of a lot and for that reason I went to the consellour since I had a feeling of surpression by it). I have amazingly many problems in getting along with my class mates and since I skipped a class and was send to school a year earlier, all the people in my grade are two to four years older than me. People either forget me, don't care for me which I find very amusing, assholish but fine for me, or are clinging on me expecting me to be their best friend. I oftenly don't get the pointe out of a joke and need time to think about it, forget to or don't laugh. I like to talk frequently in order to speak out my mind so I can see if there are any mistakes or flaws in my theories and perceptions. I choose people randomly, or rather those who I think aren't as stupid as they seem to be. It works out quite fine, still I cannot stand how people don't take me seriously at all, partly because of my age. Sometimes I feel like they want to see another personality so I pick up lines or puns or any behaviour from Anime/Manga/Movies/Books and adapt it to see if it works and after a time a line has such a stigma in my mind that it becomes a part of me. Holding on such an identity on the other side is not easy at all, it's tiring and not a solution even though it currently is happening subconciously. For you the female creatures, for me the male clumps of indentified black pixels. I don't even really seperate the genders, they're human so they're the same in a way. For that, I absolutely despise ignorance and hypocrism. I don't even know how I'm dealing with it, I'll endure and be glad when I'm alone again, I'll try to see positive things in talking to others like looking through my mind and theories by talking, I'm throughly living for myself, I draw, read, play the piano to express myself so I can understand myself better, I do sports so I feel physically satisfied, I also only social interact so I can tick this from my to do list and so I can get along with myself even more. I think putting yourself into your own focus will help no matter who you are or what condition you have and I think this is the best that I or maybe even you could do. In this process of seeing yourself, you can find your own way of dealing with it, one healthier and nicer way than what you're currently doing and seeing as not nice. They want to put me into therapy and I guess I'll deal with it, still this condition is something I consider a part of me and I do not want it to vanish. It's an important thing that helps me to grow and this is the most important thing to me. I hope you can find a way to deal with your situations too, they definitly are not easy and I can't imagine your situation in your environment. Now I've written way too much but I guess I was way to engulfed in my flood of thoughts. Sorry if there are grammar mistakes, I don't speak English as a first language and excuse me for this long ass comment. I still want to add that my condition can have cultural bias, nonetheless the condition is affecting me.

[@Redflowers9]

Your English is better than mine and tonnes of brits who aren't bilingual, or at least, you explain things very clearly. I definitely relate to what you say about jokes and talking to yourself. Strange ideas like, females act dependent when they're actually independent, because it's their evolutionary subconscious testing males to see if they can take care of their dependent offspring. The best one I've had is that people seek attention because they want to be copied, because that's the one thing that makes us human, the ability to copy one another; how could we be here without all our culture, language and ideas, and the ability to work together rests on our ability to imitate each other, so now our needs are more unique because they're more indirectly related to passing on our genes(?) maybe we want to be copied as individuals, and we're still competing but on a subtle level of being relatively spontaneous. This idea could explain how arts evolve, one person acts differently by accident, gets more attention, is more likely to be remembered, and copied to their unique needs, others recognise this, then try to copy, then something more spontaneous is needed to keep out doing the other until you're left with raw talents that can't be copied. Fans going to concerts dressing up as their band members and taking on their attitudes and beliefs. Religions are just big long lists of how to behave, why is there such a big incentive to control how other people act in their personal lives? This could explain why things as subtle as charisma are effective. But then again it might just be the fact that we're more likely to receive the benefits of the group if we get more attention, linked to just learning how to get the parent's attention to get fed. So I worry that my intuition is just being skewed by my desire to find an explanation that helps me disconnect and distrust, to see people as machines, and love as a desire to be copied to add force to the unique modern behaviours that get us fed, nothing more. I feel a motivation after playing piano in front of people that I can't get from anything else, yes, for some reason I can do that. I get the impression that you're more Schizoid, and I'm more avoidant, because you seem more content in your condition, whereas, I feel I could almost have friendships if the people just accepted who I was and I didn't have to keep pretending to feel the same way, so as much as I hate to admit, I do have to try to stay disconnected, or I can look manipulative, which is why it angers me so much when someone forces their individual values of intimacy on me, it just seems so selfish. The best I do is just accept that I'm a bit crazy, and I save my fear and anger for when I'm being pushed around. It's very complicated and exhausting to keep up with everyone's fundamentally mysteriously different differences, if you see what I mean, so I would rather have isolation and so I envy your condition. I work with people who have Borderline Personality Disorder, very controlling and attention seeking, but I don't feel like I should be there, and I'm not sure whether to leave, because I would like to do something like landscaping, to be alone out in the open air with nature, keeping fit, but then I've been advised to stay there by others who say it will help me... which, with a lot of struggling, it has, a little bit, but for how long? Life is short. My mother walked off a couple of years ago, and had the nerve to email me to tell me all about herself and her new perfect life, so I ignored her, and in fact, my whole family never cared to take my problems seriously, so I've cut them off, because I don't want them asking me for anything, whilst I just waste my life. My step dad is the only one I talk to, because we play music together and he's the only one who relates to how awful my mother is, but he's a little bit schizotypal, like if you tell him that you have these issues, he'll just bring god and jesus into it, and "let me pray for you", "your on a voyage of discovery", but it's relatively heaven compared to the rest of them. So I guess you could say he's the closest person in my life, because there's something unconditional and innocent about him. Thanks

[@ChinaDragonGirl]

***** You seem to be quite a deep thinker and overthink everything that happens to humanity as well to you and your environment. I really like this honestly, I think a person who can use their mind and rational thinking conciously is someone who has a big advantage is life. I genuinely don't like humans and their behaviours, I have hard times dealing with them but I'm overly interested in every sort of psychology, Philip Zimbardo being a big leading figure for me. When I thought about how paradox my interest, literally obsession and my behaviour is, I was thinking of why I would think this way. So I concluded that I see humans as machines, objects and subjects and experiments. Humans and humanity are so full of mysteries, scientic and philosophical mysteries. Every science is meeting in a human, biology and chemistry, physics and psychology, everything has an effect of our bodies and minds and it's fascinating how we act. My consellour said my way of thinking can be dangerous as I am not good in seeing the emotional aspects in myself and humans. Well I think this is the best way to view life and myself and I never thought differently. I play the piano as well and I think I can relate pretty well to you, playing piano is a relief, listening to the tones I play is refreshing and I feel like venting to my piano as well as embracing everyone tone that comes out of it. I put emotions and feelings in my play I think and while I'm way too nervous to play in front of others, I think it's still nice to see how people can hear that I put work and effort into playing the piece. Kind of contradicting? Or maybe I'm overthinking again? I don't want many friendships, it'd be way too much responsibility and people and that's the last thing I want. Still there is frequently overwhelming loneliness and I remember how I will never have anyone but myself. Something funny is that the closest person to me (if you can call it "close") is a person I met over the internet, a girl with Asperger Syndrome. I was especially interested as I was suspecting myself to have Asperger. We have same interests, similar circumstances and we can rant about the people in school and around us. It's an amazing and smart person I genuinely respect. They have mental issues but nonetheless they are someone who I can talk to without being judged because of my interest and obsessions, as well as inappropriate jokes or talks. I think it's much nicer and easier to talk to a person I do not know in real life, texting can be a pain as you don't immediatly know what the opposite is thinking but having something to READ and not having to to listen and remember what was just said to analyse it is much more comfortable. If you really need someone to talk to or anyone to vent to, I think you should try to find one, not even necessarily more, person in your life (if you think that could be your step dad then that'd be great) that you can frequently talk to text to in order to calm yourself or even to surpress this growing loneliness. Being in more or less contact with the people you can't get along can be of advantages, it can help you stay connected with what you (used to) want to be or be like so you wouldn't have these tiring struggles. I think it can be really interesting to watch people with Borderline Personality Disorder, I generally like to analyse and maybe even understand behaviours of people with disorders or in specific situations (f.ex Stanford Experiment, the Bystander Effect and so on). Working with them on the other side can be really hard, especially since I need time for myself. I can imagine that it can be hard to quit your current work and lifestyle as well as learning something new or even changing your life. Still you should do what would be the best for you. I have seen myself a lot in my inner mind at a place in Norway or Sweden or even China where there is nothing around me but my house and a lot of landscape, nature and silence. Trying to find oneself, being in such a identity crisis is one of the hardest thing I could imagine as I was very very frustrated just months and weeks ago, resulting in a lot of dark thoughts and actions. It's incredibly exhausting since it's like you'll never find an answer for it, which is cruel and awful. It'd be a big and risky decision for you to do such a thing you want to do. Maybe you could take some time off, go on a vacation to a place you'd like to go? You can discover more about yourself and the world and it can help you a lot to not feel so surpressed and pressured by not only the people and things around you but also yourself. Sometimes you make yourself into your worst enemy and I think instead of hating yourself you should try to actually find the perfect balance and harmony between your mind and your body (which isn't related to self esteem btw, that's another topic and issus to discuss for me). It sounds clicheed and even cheesy but I think once one adapts and understands this mind and thinking pattern, it's quite plausible and the best way to live I can think of. Personally of course.

[@frankiepoprocks]

it's nicer hearing someone else say they have these problems rather then be ashamed

[@Travilss]

I'm avoidant , i desire relationships but don't know how to go about getting them

[@LiterallyScarecrow]

So I was diagnosed with Schizoid and Antisocial Personality Disorder, along with Schizophrenia. I believe that, while this video just gives a very centered and simple overview of the PDs, it can help others to understand them on a good level. Great video, Autumn.

[@vladimircoslovbichbich7206]

I KNOW ITS STRANGE BUT I FIND HER REALY CUTE!!!!!!!!!

[@DUHMAN199912]

Him

[@jubjub9699]

dead rising 11 *her u transphobic piece of shit

[@skeletonwitch.]

I got hospitalized just a month ago because of catatonia and social anxiety, but in the end, i got diagnosed with schizotypal personality disorder, and with the prodromal phase of psychosis. Now i am trying to read every single article, and watch every single video about the topic, even though i know most of them say similar stuff, I just can't really put this information anywhere in my mind, I really didn't expect this

[@ChrisMarasP]

΅Why did she paint her eyes so heavily? She made them look scary.

[@linzbelle]

because she can.

[@MrSeminole77]

I came to this with a skeptical view. But I appreciate the personal viewpoints along with the clinical definitions. Like watching a instructional vid, there is a huge benefit to hearing the way things work and seeing the mechanism in action. In this case, the issues that exist I and how they work on people they effect. Well done and thank you !

[@danab172]

first, your eye make up is cool. second, you are very brave to make this video. cheers to you to go up against stigma.

[@KaiStrohscher]

You say that people with BPD fear abandonment and like to seek attention. Do they sometimes see the person who abandoned him or her as a threat or enemy? Last year, I went from El Paso to another town in Texas in order to attend a truck driving school. There I met a woman who became very attached to me. This lasted three or four weeks, but as soon she learned that I needed to go home to El Paso she changed her feelings instantly. A week before she had been the nicest person, but a week later she totally ignored me. She had been waiting for me to make the move towards starting a relationship, but when I finally made the move she refused just because she knew that I need to leave the town for a few days. She invented a lie that Fraternity policies don't allow her as an employee to be in relationship with me as a driver. At one point I had to leave the town in order to join a different company. Since then there is a lot of resentment towards me. She even told me "I will destroy you and then you will finally know why storms are named after women"..

[@SarahElizabeth580]

can you please make more videos about schizoid and avoidant? thanks

[@bbrxox290]

I love how you can put up these videos and help people learn about the different disorders as well as your own. I look up to people like you.

[@divyanshushankar8134]

She is scary.

[@martialkintu2035]

Divyanshu Shankar You mean he?

[@Mozarks007]

You function well for somebody with so many symptoms, at least well enough to make good videos, which most people can't. You apparently know your subject matter from the inside out, which, at least in my eyes, gives you a certain credibility lacking in the cold professionalism often found on many videos. Keep up the good work, you are doing people a service and probably helping yourself as well. Thank You!

[@hollysue30]

Just a shout out to you to thank you for the education and to make sure that someone has told you that your videos are used in Nursing School Programs to teach students about Personality Disorders and other mental illnesses. Your making an impact and we thank you for it. Side note: My teacher mentioned you were transgender and I thought she must be mistaken. Seeing your other videos, you obviously are, but what a magnificent transformation you made! Best :-)

[@AutumnAsphodel]

hollysue30 Thank you so much! Wow, I feel honored that my videos have been used in class.

[@hollysue30]

I felt my text book wasn't so great and used your video to make a graph on the 10 different personality disorders. Thank you

[@_serreina]

I admire your openness and honesty. It takes a ton of courage to talk about personal things like this, it's really inspiring. Looking forward to more videos.

[@flauwegeit]

Can men also be histrionics ? I relate to many of the points. Good video, and so cincere ! Respect for opening up this much

[@KiLLED5639]

yes. But I believe it occurs more in women than men.

[@flauwegeit]

It's hard to diagnose myself, so called professionals also did not seem to have a clue. Instead they simply labeled me autistic, even tho I am clearly not .. I did several tests and scored below the threshold of a so called normal person. I feel branded with something I am not, it bothers me

[@clockztickin]

flauwegeit No shit. Not knowing who you are is the hardest part of life I think. Look up everything. Relate however you can and find your own answer b/c no one else feels what you feel but only certain people may relate. Who knows, you might just be normal.

[@jessa2814]

It doesn't necessarily occur more in women, men are less likely to be diagnosed with HPD because many of the traits are actually accepted in men rather than women. Theres a whole "sexist bias" according to some people when it comes to HPD, a lot of men will get diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder instead, as HPD and BPD frequently co-occur.

[@KiLLED5639]

Jessa Kelley I'm going of the articles I read online. They all say the same thing, plus the DSM-IV. I don't know if it's changed in the DSM-V.

[@marciabaker2700]

A simple thank-you for your time and effort. A comforting video with a lot of easy-to-understand info. Excellent job. Lost a friend to PPD recently and having a difficult time with it.

[@Shingjanjie]

is it possible to have a little bit of cluster A and cluster C ?

[@mareeloup]

+Grace 夢幻專家 No

[@mocuishle6116]

Yes.

[@mirastonem2768]

This was extremely helpful for me! Whilst in the hospital my doctors and such really didn't explain anything to me, you explain things so clearly and it's just amazing! Thank you so much for making this, THANK YOU THANK YOU

[@QuëstionšnÅňşwęŕż]

were all struggling with something. beautiful video.

[@mamarox56]

thank you for sharing this info. I feel very isolated and often times lonely because my bipolar disorder. when I hear someone like you who has the courage to expose themselves, it HELPS. I am exhausted by this illness and am also tired of feeling guilty for not being more.

[@emilyyoung9285]

Can I have borderline, dependent and avoidant at the same time?

[@mareeloup]

+Emily Young No

[@bitchpudding6800]

I watched a few of your videos and you actually saved me from attempting suicide today. I just want to say thank you so much and I absolutely love you!

[@hypnamog]

I'm in A,B & C. In other words; Cluster F (Fucked).

[@leslierepin]

Thank you for posting all of this~ Your shares are very giving to those of us who are students in clinical social work, diagnostics and work with an array of several different types of amazing people. :)

[@stephanieconroyslife]

I just really want to hug you, but I am codependent....

[@danielmurray04]

Stephanie Conroy lol run far, and fix yourself.. it can be done, but there is a definite push to keep you on them, with them.

[@gothbattyy]

I have Borderline Personality Disorder, Depression, & Anxiety Disorder. Thank you Autumn for helping me realize I was in denial, and this helped me

[@KrunchyTheClown78]

Luckily, none of these apply to me :)

[@uiffbkttg3945]

Cuz ur a fucking *narcissist*

[@tellitlikeitis8691]

U if fbk Ttg LMAO

[@jackl.8343]

Hi Autumn. I have to say your video was well done, informative, SPOT-ON, and showed tremendous insight and courage to be so honest about how you relate to or associate parts of your thinking and behaviors with some and not with others. Those three things, done with the transparency you displayed, along with the essential aspects of each disorder, is pretty bad-ass. I also want to thank you for clarifying a couple things that were unclear from just reading. Btw, as I am sure you know, just short of 15% of the population have one, but usually show more than one type of personality disorder, which you displayed quite beautifully. Cheers! ~ Jack

[@IvaZinga]

Do all people have at least one disorder or there are people with none of it?

[@bradleynoneofyourbizz5341]

Before you can be clinically diagnosed with ANY personality disorder there is certain criteria to be met. Probably the most significant one reads, "The enduring pattern leads to clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other important areas of functioning" Basically, does it make your life unmanageable?

[@sammiboy1993]

I have recently been diagnosed with PTSD, GAD and a possible personality disorder, you have helped me understand why I feel the way I do. If only I the professionals would pull their fingers out and put as much dedication in as you have done with this video! Thanks again bird ! You can always add me on Facebook if you'd like a pen pal haha

[@wolfpackleaderalpha]

Out of curiosity, what is your world full of mystical or magical things like?

[@jubjub9699]

wolfpackleaderalpha was this sarcasm or saying it's fake ? Btw it means daydreams an down way of living if you did not know

[@creatrixZBD]

Don't worry, I don't want to be your friend :) but I did feel moved to want to thank you, and mention something... It's refreshing to hear all this expressed succinctly and articulately, much appreciated. But the main thing that kept me watching and listening, was that you radiate a lovely, genuine sense of warmth and "Yourself-ness" that really reaches out from the screen. I don't quite have the right words, but how you seem so open and giving despite your own vulnerabilities is really, really inspiring.. I hope that doesn't sound silly, but thank you so much. :)

[@mohammednoba1]

It is really great .

[@cedricbottom2932]

how can people not like this! this is what I live with every day and it compleatly screwes up everything . wish I had looked in to this years ago. great video and it helps

[@punkybrewstar83]

You are awesome :)

[@beckeesheerin6227]

Hello there. I give you a lot of credit for making this video. It helps me to understand what my family member who is suffering is dealing with.

[@tehjargonz0r]

this girl loves talking about herself lol

[@hannaha4305]

Bingo, you nailed it, that's her disorder, self absorption, she is so focused on herself she hasn't developed a personality that is rooted in growth and development. There is no depth, shifting from one thing to another like a chameleon , it's sad.

[@rosehibiscus1899]

@@hannaha4305 Can you describe to me what a *“chameleon”* type of person mean? 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

[@TheStarpuncher]

Dude she's annoying

[@Vaehlo]

She's a nassarcist-

[@ericsacks5731]

Well the video helped me so hursh

[@jessa2814]

GREAT video! Was working on a case study & reading my DSM-5 right before I watched this, one of the few vids on youtube with correct information! Good job :)

[@GamingJojoWorld]

BORDERLINE applies to me totally

[@jessegarcia32]

stop self diagnosis. It minimizes the actual patients with this disorder.

[@drekaflugan]

ok but what if this could help them get diagnosed if they actually have it. no need to be rude

[@marcieclark7911]

Thank you for this. I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder about 2 years ago (which was a very very rough time in my life) I'm finally getting to the point where I'm not ashamed about it, because I know now it is not my fault. Its a struggle, that's for sure. But thankfully I have a wonderful fiancé who's been there for me since day 1. I'm learning more and more about my BPD and I really loved this video. +1 subscriber :)

[@jehovahuponyou]

MOTICIA ADDAMS HAVING A BAD MAKEUP DAY.

[@bertThugh2]

I appreciate the presentation. It is very accurate in the details. The traits of them all are actually on a continuum ( 'line' if you will), wherein the further along on the anti-social personality scale the disorder is (go from left to right in severity), the greater is the intensity of the traits one shares in common with the other disorders. But the 'point' along the continuum where a disorder is the most clearly defined, is the 'point' where the severity of the disordered thinking is at its own maximum, & therefore the disorder does not 'run into' the other disorders further along the 'line' (going towards the right), though all the personality disorders share the same general bottom-line traits of the antisocial personality (that exist along the entire continuum). Autumn is very beautiful inside & brave to be putting herself 'out there,' very self-aware, articulate & intelligent. I think she is very 'in touch' with people. It shows big time. Kudos to her!

[@plalelal]

If you have to paint a face on that you show to the world, aren't you living a life of illusion?

[@aliciasanchez4]

+BodaBoom BigAl if you have to trim your beard and not bathe, aren't you presenting an illusion? God people are fucking stupid

[@plalelal]

Alicia Sanchez Yes you are.

[@walloffire2225]

Very informative! It's great to see that you have such clarity of your own psyche, challenges and self awareness. You are obviously intelligent and that sometimeus can be a burden because we tend to over think a lot of things. You are doing something very productive with your knowledge. This is a rare combination and I commend you for your interest in helping others. Great job!

[@Griptonify]

She's suffering from ASWD Attention Seeking Woman Disorder. Strange how many women have that these days.

[@mummyIzy]

Would be interesting to see your diagnosis prior to her transition...

[@riverwest1]

"Personality disorders" never looked so good! You're awesome!

[@paisleysprotests9849]

You made a lot of claims as to "relating to" clusters A and C which is comical. Your B, no question. Are you transgender?

[@floptropica239]

Paisleys Protests yes she is

[@michaelesposito239]

I have advice. Tweark for 1 minute to open the video..Educate us then tweark for 1 minute to end the video...You will then be able to educate the masses with this method because I believe you have it going on physically and mentally. I like it alot.

[@professionalserialkiller3782]

Are you crazy 😂

[@jubjub9699]

Professional Serial killer that's offensive. ....... could you not use crazy? 😑

[@doomkatt13x]

Thank you so much Autumn for this video. It explains so much and I actually felt better for watching it. Especially locating my symptoms to the paranoid, borderline and dependant/anxious. It's always nice to retrieve info from an attractive goth too! Thanks again and I've subscribed. Keep up the good work. X

[@gussygatlin3093]

All i have to say after reading some ignorant comments here... Is if these symptoms are effecting your everyday life... There IS a problem... Don't judge others... Because you don't understand their struggles... Another thing i learned.... Is there is a spectrum in everything... Maybe we are ALL nuts in one form or another.... We need love and compassion to help others... Im in love with a Beautiful man that i could never give up on that has issues.... If it were ME... Id HOPE he would never give up on me as i struggled to keep my head above water!!! He loves kittys... They help him cope... Along with that Love and Comassion... Hes going into the hospital Wed. for his evaluation. I pray we find answers and he can finally find peace within himself... Thank you young lady for your channel... God Bless You. Also... Finding The Lord helps too! ❤

[@gloriasenpai8980]

my favourite mental health youtuber such a nice person

[@melindasanderseclectic]

You are good at pointing out your boundaries. This is something I like about people under the penumbra of skizophrenia. I think being perfect in videos is a requirement of a good producer.

[@kyliemiller8024]

I was diagnosed with depression during the summer after seventh grade. Ever since then I have been interested in psychology and I plan on majoring in it. Probably around my junior year of high school I was looking into disorders and realized that I fit most, if not all, the criteria for Borderline. It scared me mainly because I didn't want to be categorized as something else, something worse (at least in my mind it was worse). I haven't had the courage to bring it up to anyone but two people neither of which I am related to. I push people out of my life. When I meet someone and try to pursue a relationship with them I warn them that I will hurt them. I always do. If things are going well I often create an argument out of nothing. I create a problem sooner so that I won't hurt them later. I've always been very sexual in how I express myself, but I have found that a lot of times when a guy likes me I see it as they like me for my body and therefore I give them sex because I feel that's all I'm worth. I feel like I am an object. I stopped taking my antidepressants (yes I realize this is bad but for a while I was doing great without them, I was happy and stable, but then something changed in my life and it went downhill) and I started having horrible mood swings. Again I started arguing for no reason and being nasty towards loved ones. I've never had a stable relationship with anyone in my entire life. One minute I love them and think I can't live without them and the next I blame them for everything. I've always felt like a burden, like people would be better off without me. I mean there's more, but just by this would you guys say I might have borderline?

[@pirzy02]

I'm prepping for psychology exams. You are a pleasure to listen to, your method or presentation is so clear and so easy to understand. Also, I didn't get lost in facts and figures because you make it about 'people' and not just the 'conditions'. Thank you.

[@palomathereptilian]

I'm totally Paranoid, I was diagnosed w/ PPD some months ago and it was so enlightening for me bc I spent my almost entire teenage years (I'm 19) suspecting everyone around me, creating conspiracies inside my mind that everyone hated and bullied me at school and neighborhood, actually the trigger for the PPD was the bullying, but at several times it was something of my mind, not real bullying... And the worst part is that I could not imagine it was something of my mind, and that delusions ended made me fall into severe depression, kinda avoidant personality too... But I don't think that I'm Avoidant too bc I have Asperger Syndrome, and this avoidant thing have always been present in my life, I think it's an Aspie thing... And now that I'm in a relationship, I feel even more the presence of PPD in my mind, G'd I hate it a lot to be Paranoid, I feel like I mess up everything with this shit personality :(

[@donnavickery9623]

You are not narcissistic. But you are a beautiful human being with extraordinary gifts. You are valuable and you are important !!! Don't even think that you are not beautiful, important or gifted !!!

[@pattyhegedus]

Very informative! My Mom was diagnosed with anti social personality disorder, may she rest in peace. I'm ashamed to say that have gone through life without looking into the disorder. ( I'm 55). I have some of same traits. I used to say the only difference between her and I was I knew I when I was being rude and she didn't. Thank you.

[@tedtate57]

very interesting. I don't think i've never come across anyone who was as honest as you.

[@sdhc21]

I believe it's just the stages of being human, and what makes someone human but it's always good to know what the label is.

[@thatothergirl4663]

Anyone with antisocial here? Honestly, when you have ASPD you feel like nobody understands you. You often have thoughts about homicide and there are many people with this disorder who are also depressed. It's tough for us. People often think of us as murderers. Nowadays when someone hears the word psychopath, the first thing they think is a killer. But that's not true. I really hate that I have to hide this from people but even though I sometimes show clear signs of the disorder, no one seems to notice due to lack of knowledge. And because of that people don't understand us. They treat us like monsters and avoid us at all costs. That's why I personally think that hiding your personality is best. Of course it's not easy to pretend to have another personality but it's one of the few things to do if you don't want anyone to know the truth. Conduct disorder is the same as ASPD. It's when you show signs of ASPD but you're under 18. I'm only saying this for the people who want to tell someone about their mental state (if they suffer from this) so make sure to include that as well. Otherwise people might not really believe you.

[@dezlovdahl7163]

thank you for this.. the first time someone has explained my disorder and it has not made me feel bad about myself

[@karamarieramsey8749]

Thanks again Autumn for another in-depth and personal video, and can relate to a lot of it. Stay strong and beautiful.

[@ellyess7203]

Autumn Asphodel: I have only just seen this presentation. It is very good. Thank you.. I am so sorry you have such a terribly hard time. I sincerely hope your life is getting better. I think you can hope that as you grow older things do improve a bit. This isn't saying you are young and therefore not so good at managing, indeed you are very capable, this video proves it. I am just saying that in many ways I grew more confident and calm as I got older and I welcomed that. You deserve to be confident, to know you are loved and are lovely and to have a good life. good luck, my Dear.

[@zanatheweirdo]

This has been very helpful. Thank you very much for sharing this. I overcame depression via therapy and giving up control to medical professionals. I feel fabulous but I do have random periods of PD like 5/6 times per year for about a week at a time. Stay beautiful. I love your eye makeup :)!

[@karyn2480]

Hi Autumn, Thank you for taking so much time in researching the Personality Disorders. Your presentation was very well put together, easy to follow and understand and informative . I also, appreciate your transparency about you. That is brave of you. God bless

[@naninhawn]

I'm not a native speaker of english, but you speak so clearly, it really helps me!. Thank u. I really like your videos.