Are Sword TikToks as Bad as I Expected...?

[@Skallagrim]

I'm hoping that the first one is satire. Could have used a sarcastic tone of voice to indicate it... on the internet you never know, after all. Either satire or AI generated. It's just too absurd to be real... right?

[@jasonhare8540]

Literally said the same thing then looked up and saw we're on the same page 🤔🤣🤣🤣🤣

[@Benw8888]

I think it's satire

[@dexterion5940]

It's a Tik tok Skal...What did you expected,educational guide?

[@IPostSwords]

It's just that companies weird method of advertising. It's over the top, sarcastic, dumb anime sword memes to sell over the top, dumb anime swords with absurd profit margins.

[@nonsequitor]

Neither: it's what happens when idiots meet mass market clickfarming with assistance from non native speakers via AI scriptwriting - and as neither the creators or the intended viewers have any idea what they're taking about, there's nothing pushing back 🤦‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤦‍♂️

[@yjlom]

katana: no handle, not sword-shaped, blunt, bronze, as expensive as 2000 modern fighter jets got it

[@Skallagrim]

The price at least is a joke related to the One Piece character, but the rest... unless it's a references I'm not getting it's just... huh?

[@Arkancide]

@@Skallagrim The comments help explain. Apparently the character is named Law. Tiktok is cancer, and I can't stand young people. (fellow millennial)

[@Skallagrim]

@@Arkancide Yeah, that's what I pointed out in the video.

[@Arkancide]

@@Skallagrim Oops. Still waking up, carry on.

[@CazadorSlayer]

So what you are saying is a katan is actually a bronze dildo? Today I learned!

[@Philocyb1n]

THE BLADE IS UNIQUE , ITS MADE FROM CARBON STEEL AND SHARP

[@bloodlove93]

you are unique, you have skin and bones,unlike the rest of us.

[@Maedhros0Bajar]

To be fair, my sharp carbonsteel Kriegsmesser is obviously not a sword, but a knife. Seriously though, I hope whoever made that was joking

[@Tanzenergise]

@@bloodlove93 that is true, i'm only bone RATTLE EM BOYS!!!

[@milire2668]

@@bloodlove93 *- Mark Zzzzzuckerberg

[@vicenteabalosdominguez5257]

I mean, have you ever seen a sword made from SHARP before?

[@robertl6196]

"Fuzzy Tsuba" would be a great name for an all-girl Japanese pop-band.

[@melee-dexterdexterious2878]

You're right, hopefully the band would have gained a better world wide recognition than Japanese all girl pop-band Speed.

[@GoblinSquid]

It would be a better name for an all-boy weeb band tbh.

[@jonathanwienke512]

It sounds like some kind of hentai innuendo to me...🤯

[@flinchfu]

It's AI generated dialogue. That's why it's 100% nonsensical.

[@ehsanrahee7411]

That was my first thought, and it became more and more apparent to me that that's the case

[@seanrush3723]

Ai dialogue makes me run my eardrums through

[@GlidingZephyr]

​@@ehsanrahee7411The narrator was reciting the dialogue like he would from a script, too. My brain hurts, now.

[@lasskinn474]

it's dishonest text written by a person. think about the become a lord in scotland adcopy and it's website, none of it makes sense as a whole and it's not supposed to make sense as a whole, the idea is to someone to buy something they can say is a joke item later. it hardly matters if it's ai generated or made as a filler clickbait by a person hitting keys. it'll make just as much sense. "this is not a normal katana its shaped like a sword" etc, it's been basic idiocy level advert writing for like a decade now.

[@RetiredRhetoricalWarhorse]

See, I thought the internet had already made people dumber to a degree that was getting to be really scary... I wonder how low we'll be able to go now...

[@hankj.wimbleton_gamer-madn2412]

from the first 2 seconds i already had brain damage

[@nyx3988]

Same

[@SergioLeonardoCornejo]

Imagine the effect it has on people who consume TikTok content regularly.

[@bloodlove93]

that's the "magic" of tiktok...pure concentrated brain rot

[@getdown464]

nah man this isn't brain damage, this is brain necrosis

[@Agelessreaper121]

@@SergioLeonardoCornejo actually scary...

[@mrslasher1064]

"this sword isn't like other swords because it has a handle" *W H A T ?*

[@stax6092]

Yes, the classic Sword without a handle. No real reason to take a sword out of it's sheath or anything.

[@dragonslayer3552]

And it's SHARP ???!!! BRO what ??!!! In my life I have never seen a sharp sword

[@crusaderking9328]

I mean without a handle, at least there's something to say about equality. While you're hurting your opponent, you're slicing your own hand. Seems fair, doesn't it? ;)

[@Tryxxor]

I guess he meant katana instead of sword, a katana is just the blade without anything attached to it but i still doesnt make any sense

[@dragonslayer3552]

@@Tryxxor wtf are you on about katanas have handles... How do you think people held them by the sharp blade ?

[@GreatSageSunWukong]

that glass/plastic sword would look really good on a wall with some LED lighting to make it look like a fantasy ice blade sort of thing

[@justinbremer2281]

Or on a cosplay

[@poilboiler]

Or red to make it glow like magma. Green would look amazing as well. Need a lot of walls.

[@Skallagrim]

That would be awesome, yeah.

[@CrizzyEyes]

@@justinbremer2281 best part is all you'd need to do is tape a few cyan LEDs to it to achieve the effect portably

[@kemarisite]

My reaction to that one was to flash back to the glass daggers filled with green ... acid (?) used by Milady in The Four Musketeers (1974).

[@kanamisprs4330]

Pommels are so old skool, tickle him rightly with your fluffy tsuba. Thats real swordsmanship.

[@MonkeyJedi99]

Dang, I was drinking iced tea when I read your comment, nearly choked to death.

[@tamsinashton2293]

Tickle him rightly. 😂. That tickled my sense of humour.

[@Bogdin7]

How to go from Swordsmanship to Relationship.

[@TheFallenSHDW]

Striking the back to disgrace your enemy: ❌ Tickle them with your fuzzy tsuba: 👌

[@ApexZer0]

That saint anger joke was top tier

[@1IGG]

I didn't even recognise the song. It was so meh, I ignored it when it released.

[@EricLinstone]

I *really* wanted to like that album but I just could not. It's the only CD I ever threw in the trash. And I stayed with them through Load and Reload.

[@Kishandreth]

Thanks for clarifying that joke... I stopped listening to their new stuff because it couldn't hold a candle to ride the lightning. I never listened to the whole album.

[@georgedeng8646]

"Enema sword" thats the most terrifying thing I have heard of. Should be in a Dark souls game.

[@doomspud6302]

The chosen weapon of the LOATHSOME DUNG EATER!!!

[@bloodlove93]

charge attack, kancho of eternity,the everlasting butt burn does dark souls have charge attacks, idk and idc.

[@DeHerg]

Would not be surprised if it was a game translated from Japanese. (With chances being 50/50 for it to be an incorrect translation or not)

[@CyberVonCyberus]

​@@bloodlove93 Yeah, you can charge heavy attacks and in Elden Ring spells can also be charged

[@b0t123]

it's kinda hot ngl

[@Hankbob_Hillpants]

4:40 ah yes, my favourite weapon, a sounding rod on a stick

[@Lilith-Rose]

A sounding rod for horses at that

[@jimbob3332]

I mean... I'd be terrified.

[@brian_sipe]

*_Kirsche has entered the chat_*

[@jakubmaj4975]

​@@brian_sipe Never have I ever expected a Kirsche reference under this kind of video.

[@planescaped]

I've never been on Tik Tok in my life, and I feel incredibly smug about that.

[@TheScottishbear]

You're not the only one my friend

[@danielantony1882]

Hell yeah, my fellow follower of truth.

[@BeachTypeZaku]

You're doing yourself a favor and I can't stress that enough.

[@goldenageofdinosaurs7192]

Just feel fortunate. That place is a factory for lowering IQ’s. I actually think it’s quite dangerous to us as a species (social media in general).

[@maastomunkki]

Stay that way, unless you wish to inflict upon yourself instant brain trauma. I had one short look on someone else's phone and my IQ got halved. Now I can no longer even find my shoelaces let alone tie them..

[@terragamer7142]

4:18 "CLEARLY this is not intented to be functional" -Skallagrim while talking about a glass sword

[@withoutdaysofficial]

Glad I'm not the only one who caught that lol

[@adamlanglois563]

That app is from the part of the map where it says "here be monsters" where brain cells go to die

[@Slayerlord13]

I saw someone somewhere call Tiktok something along the lines of "the next generation of Facebook boomers"

[@Loki_Firegod]

The crochet sword one was actually really funny, couldn't agree more :D Apart from that, I've now had a couple more reasons to stay away from TikTok. Thanks! Also, because I know you can use the feedback: Great (and very funny) video, as always. No matter how badly the algorithm treats you, I always enjoy when you upload something new, and usually it either makes me laugh, or teaches me something I didn't know before, or sometimes both. Thanks and see you on (or under/next to) the next one. :)

[@jonaswerner8480]

2:58 "barbabianca: where do you put it exactly?" Highly underrated comment

[@massilcabanas34]

"Well... speaking of melons" 😂

[@Draslia]

It's almost summer after all!

[@ronwingrove683]

The words "fuzzy tsuba" will be forever etched in a cursed place somewhere deep in my soul.

[@GlidingZephyr]

By my own admission, I have a sizable collection of "tacticool" sharp implements. Some are more serviceable than others. What I don't have are a bunch of cheap katanas. Even though I was a complete weeb while I was a teenager and young adult (the mid and late 1990's into the early 2000's, respectively). Have I missed out? Do I need to see what TikTok has to say, on the matter? No, I didn't. And I don't.

[@IPostSwords]

Gonna take a wild guess and say "yes". Sure, it's not all terrible. But the vast majority is.

[@MysticPaladin]

SellswordArts does better short-form content that has, well, content, and is quite informative.

[@Lord_Marquaad]

Don't forget robinsword

[@MysticPaladin]

@@Lord_Marquaad Them too. I like that Robinsword has a more scholar look while SellswordArts does more of a devilish swashbuckler duelist.

[@gangrenousgandalf2102]

*ahem * Minikatana-

[@IPostSwords]

@@gangrenousgandalf2102 my opinions on MK are public record. No need to *ahem* about it

[@theperfectbotsteve4916]

"it has a handle which most swords lack." that line did more damage than a sword

[@taurengraybeard218]

My favorite way to start the day. Pedantic sword nerd commentary. Thank you Skal. 🖤

[@tirionpendragon]

The first clip you showed could have one shotted a bear totem barbarian for the amount of psychic damage it dealt.

[@augiedad54]

I follow you for the sword-talk, but you possess a truly entertaining sense of humor. Keep up the good work!

[@Skallagrim]

Thanks!

[@graywolfdracon]

Thanks for taking one for the team. Only time I watch something on Tic Tok is when somebody on KZbin makes fun of it on their channel.

[@Knoloaify]

The first video was probably translated from Mandarin using machine translation and AI voice-over. 3 Chinese ads on Tiktok uh, who would have thought.

[@gman1515]

Either that or it was stolen content that was run through an AI to reword things slightly. All depends on whether or not there was a legitimate link to buy the sword

[@galactigo4463]

Minikatana rarely uses computer generated voice overs but I can see why you’d think that

[@eddys.3524]

"It's a sword, Skall... but not as we know it.."???

[@Elriuhilu]

"Samurai off the starboard bow, starboard bow, starboard bow!"

[@Skaven_Trans_Girl]

Swords cannae change the laws of physics, laws of physics, laws of physics!

[@c99kfm]

"We come in piece, cut to kill, oops it broke!"

[@JustGrowingUp84]

These were so crazy, my two remaining brain cells beat themselves to death through high-speed collisions with the inner wall of my skull. Then they got raised as undead brain cells, and immediately started wailing on each-other with giant corkscrews that have fuzzy tsubas. Considering their undead status, this situation will probably continue for the foreseeable future.

[@crusaderking9328]

Maybe giving them sharp swords without handels, might help to resolve the situation more quickly.

[@grimreaper_cz]

This is the first time I dread what videos Skall will watch

[@lanigirognithemos]

I think the first video was trolling. You got me with the cliffhanger watermelon 🤣🤣🤣 Every time Zoro calls his sword I keep thinking enema too 🤣

[@Alepap.]

"This is not your normal katana, it's shaped like a sword" wat

[@TommyBaggins]

The only thing missing from these tiktoks is The Catfish Knife. Y'all remember The Catfish Knife? The one that "stares into your soul with its dead, hate-filled eye." I can't stop laughing at the thought of that thing showing up on tiktok.

[@shawnespinoza9300]

I am glad I found this channel! Total hilarious! Keep up the good work.

[@Zaznin]

Skall 😂 I was not prepared for this level of sass from a source other than my mirror so early in my morning. Thank you! 😂😂

[@Hatsworthful]

5:21 "the anatomically correct duck"

[@flyingninja1234]

I can only imagine the alternate universe, where everything is Crochet. That sword would scare people.

[@haydnmalyon7690]

Loved hearing the respectful mention of Robinswords. You two are my go-to sword guys.

[@plumaDshinigami]

TikTok is the fastest way to rot braincells.

[@cloudycat8178]

for the youtube stuffs, happy to see you still making stuff even if this one was late to my feed. Take care!

[@shkotayd9749]

We could feel your brain cracking trying to pore through that material bahaha xD

[@chasebh89]

"i shouldn't judge an entire platform by one video" In this case you absolutely should

[@megasuperhyperspeed]

I'd wiped the trauma of st anger from my memory. Thanks for the flashbacks

[@frantisekvrana3902]

3:23 Certainly not for self defense. The unscrewing and screwing back in of the knobby part would take way too long.

[@jonathanwienke512]

I suspect the raison d etre of the fuzzy tsuba is that some people can't find anything unless it has hair around it.

[@AdamCeladin]

Haha great video Skall! Tik Tok is so cringe full of fake videos and ,,Influencers,, :D

[@janhornak5739]

Hi Adam, didn´t expected you here, more like Jakub or Lukáš🙏🙇⛩

[@AdamCeladin]

@@janhornak5739 Haha i am friend with Skall at least 10+ years we made some collabs together ,))

[@djeeno]

my brain started itching at some parts but what caught my eye most was the incredibly overpowered cuts ninja-bro was doing. I mean, his form was... something, but he swung a light two-handed sword as if it was a lead pipe he was going to bludgeon someone with.

[@MarkWiseTechno]

The glass wall-hanger was cool AF

[@Brruhmine]

I might be wrong but the thing in 4:45 might be a "stylised" version of a Chinese Sword Mace/Bar Mace or Sword Breaker It's basically a bludgeoning weapon like a mace that is shaped like a sword

[@Skallagrim]

Original Chinese bar maces are mostly shaped like swords, yeah. This thing... not so much.

[@Brruhmine]

@@Skallagrim yeah it does look like one of those self defense pleasure masters which are apparently called keu chain strickers but longer lol. But u know close enough lmaooo

[@netherslayer3561]

Thank you for your sacrifice. And, my condolences; those first few really hurt

[@Umbral_Choir]

Even this limited and filtered exposure to that accursed platform gave me a severe case of brainrot. The damage cannot ever be undone.

[@Segalmed]

All a Chinese commie plot, no doubt. :-)

[@thereplyguyreviews]

The amount of brain hemorrhaging I suffered within the first 3 minutes was incredible

[@terraelaweonao]

Thanks for reinforcing my decision to avoid TikTok xd

[@k0lpA]

1:00 lol the number even ends with a coma $3,000,000, wtf

[@Skallagrim]

Guess it didn't fit the stupid vertical format. :D

[@jgbizarro2726]

4:15 made with the best material for a sword: diamond

[@stonedape3285]

Netherite is better tho

[@purplelibraryguy8729]

Diamond might be too brittle.

[@camb06]

For some reason, KZbin had stopped suggesting your stuff to me for quite a while. I’d forgotten how much I just enjoyed listening to you talk.

[@xGreenMtnx]

Love your videos Skallagrim

[@atotaldummy9645]

I hate how there's a tiktok that just says "give this a name" on top of the bloodborne cane whip, like it's not enough with only sony forgetting about the game

[@devastationofmankind3495]

"it also has a handle witch most sword dont have..." Me: dafuq?...ammm, ACORDING TO FCKING WHO?!?!?!...

[@madmalkavian3857]

Yeah swords with handles are weird. Makes it difficult to attach to my arm like a normal person would.

[@devastationofmankind3495]

@@madmalkavian3857 right right...or you can allways use the force sir.

[@darkner2390]

I spent years growing this brain of mine only to lose half of it to the very first TikTok video.

[@ChrisLeeW00]

I wasn’t quite sure what I was looking at until I noticed the fuzzy tsuba, it’s a sword 😂

[@antonakesson]

Wow. New channel logo, eh? Nice

[@odstpsych4702]

Why Skall, why, as an elder Millennial I had effectively scrubbed that song from my brain. Now it will never go away. Love you anyway. Keep up the good work.

[@CruelDwarf]

First clip sounds like someone narrated Ali express lot description and turned it into tiktok video. It is my working theory.

[@Bargadiel]

Chinese content farms try very hard. The sad part is this garbage still gets millions of views because children use the platform.

[@EdwardNavu]

Glad that I'm not alone with allgery from clickbaits

[@artwald1619]

So you want to get pedantic? Not every functional sword is made of carbon steel. Bronze/Iron swords are functional too! ( : They should be sharp though...

[@iitim2152]

Im 90% percent sure the first one is an elaborate anime joke to an anime i havent seen

[@Bogdan-oc1fm]

My brain is dead by dis monstrositi

[@atrocious7766]

Niarb a evah llits uoy tsael ta.

[@StarMystro]

Great video! I love your humor Skall. "Fuzzy tsuba" lol

[@Brruhmine]

7:12 "so clearly there's good content even on tiktok" *Skips shadiversity at the start* Classic lmao

[@VegetaLF7]

I think the most horrifying thing in this video was Anime Skalla.

[@houayangthe3rd]

Made by Chinese ticktocker using AI to speak English. Ticktock was a mistake, or was AI, or the Chinese, or maybe it was the friend we made.

[@saaaaaaaaalt838]

I'm convinced more than half of these are procedurally generated ads. No humans involved.

[@rinnsbebelindegrombe]

Nice to hear of you again. god påske!

[@comradezero]

"CLEARly" this wasn't intended to be functional. Nice.

[@chricre]

It is unique because it has a handle, made of steel, and sharp... no other sword has these features! 😮😅😂

[@NarlepoaxIII]

"This sword is completely unlike other swords, because it has a handle, and it's made of steel, and it's sharp." Oh... Okay.

[@Le_Rappel_des_oiseaux]

"Well, speaking of melons..." XD

[@Andy-413]

That guy's not the real life sword master, he's the real life jumping and spinning with sword master.

[@ignatz14]

Sword Technology will surely make huge leaps with the invention of handles and sharp blades. Can't wait to see where this goes :D

[@koenkooiman1490]

Haha, awesome video😂 would love to see you do this more often 😁👍 not solely ofcourse, just more often.

[@tapioperala3010]

Another great example why I will never *ever* touch TikTok

[@Zorgdub]

"This sword's blade is unique because it is sharp." ... right.

[@lukewilliams8548]

Your sacrifice for our entertainment has not gone unapretiated.

[@Genshion]

I have a new ambition. To make nonsensical, schizo sword tiktoks

[@vhaelen326]

5:08 big "on all levels... except physical, im a sword" energy

[@SquishyFletcher]

2:05 I'm not sure why that sword ad is cut so short, they're usually much longer, and in the longer version they do cut the melon. There's a lot of swords from this company (or dozens like it) that are apparently more than just wall-hangers...

[@jbeckley6849]

Skallagrim's soul died a little watching these TikToks.

[@dr.krimson1010]

Leprechaun Skal saying "It's the fuzzy tsuba!" at 1:50 completely broke me. I spent the better part of 10 minutes actually laughing out loud. My abs hurt.

[@wavetactics13]

Ever since Facebook jumped on the Tik Tok trend with reels, I've had a stream of product placement and twirly whirly sword clips every time I open the app.

[@zoromax10]

I could watch this for like 3 hours straight, please do more

[@alexmendoza3265]

I never comment on videos but you had me on floor with Fuzzy tsuba. 😂

[@christopherdunn8767]

Almost spat out my tea at that St Anger joke. That was amazing.

[@Stegopelon]

“I’m sure y did “ from like 1st minute i am sure this gonna be gold 😂

[@alinkinthechain]

That first one is no doubt produced by Mini Katana, a distributor (NOT A MANUFACTURER) of anime sword reproductions. These guys are marketers, not really sword enthusiasts, and I'm sick of their content polluting the internet. They spout nonsense like how a katana is superior because it "auto-aligns" itself in a cut, which is just untrue. I could forgive their method if they actually sold a decent product. Look if you wanna get a replica of your favorite anime sword for display, then they're probably up your alley. If you are looking for a sword, look elsewhere; you can find what you're looking for for the same price

[@65firered]

I'm getting Samurai Cop flashbacks. "He speaks fluent Japanese." Get this man a mocap suit. 6:12

[@TheGigashadow]

Love ya Skall, I just wish your videos were longer.

[@asdfjoe123]

3:10 - Come on man! Put a NSFW tag on your video if you're going to have personal stimulation devices featured. I've got kids watching with me!

[@Alexcursus]

3:30 that thing could be inspired by the Chinese Iron whip, which it a rod of a baton instead of angular like a bar.

[@SteveGBD]

i am laughing so loud! the faces while you judge the narration!! not the fuzzy tsuba LMAO