Biden's Mumbles & Dance Moms | The Tim Dillon Show

[@jdl2962]

Please give an emergency broadcast Tim. Your country needs you.

[@ClarkKempt]

This!

[@Gaggerlotion]

We wish everyone well.

[@Qsurvivorfan]

Please

[@TheVelvetVixen]

That's why I'm here this morning expecting an emergency response. ❤

[@cpreid]

🏌️‍♂️

[@nasko235679]

Every time Tim says "FATTY BOOMBATTY" my soul heals.

[@CallMeKichael]

Another personal favorite is the way he said "PIGlet" one time, the enunciation on the pig is what truly got me though.

[@DaveWasThereMan]

It's fatty boombalatty but whatever

[@rainflowers1099]

I can relate to that

[@samcostanzo3370]

@@rainflowers1099

[@CIRCLEOFTONE]

That and it's a tie between Tim and Yannis Pappas who has the best "YAS!".

[@chuckleberry2025]

The fact Tim knows so much about dance moms reassures me that he’s actually gay

[@maxmeeks9910]

He says his parents didn't make the deal to make him famous as a child actor. I'm thinking, they did, and the memories are repressed.

[@rawkingkong]

​@@maxmeeks9910i think he was cast for the role of the friend in the movie BIG 🎬

[@BMG19FUNNYDIE]

It makes his comedy unique the fact he can actually sit through it.

[@saucyrossy3698]

This is the most astute comment on the internet. Literally. i congratulate you.

[@calvinjackson5013]

🤣🤣🤣

[@quicktrips]

Episode 400 is gonna be hot after the news this afternoon

[@SlippinJimmy4Life]

Very hot

[@space_1073]

it's a shame he posted yesterday and we have to wait an entire week.

[@ukaszpytlik6926]

⁠@@space_1073 #400 dropped 2h ago ;)

[@punished_gooner]

​@@space_1073he knew we couldn't wait

[@seanyfaulkner7106]

He was the only one with the balls to talk about it and w alex j of all ppl , YES & YES

[@deatox]

when tim has the percocet mom sunglasses on you know it’s gonna be a banger

[@MrSlayerboy99]

They cost $82,000

[@guccimane623]

@@MrSlayerboy99life in the big city 🌃

[@scumbaggo]

i miss my percocet mom, she went to the dive bar a block from me. id buy her a pitcher or 2 of lager for 2-3x smurfs. shot pool with her for hours. place shut down, everyone scattered like rats.

[@escapist502]

I also very much love that😂

[@vagabond251]

"Those were $500 sunglasses you asshole..." Tim: "Your sunglasses only cost you $500?"

[@darbyohara]

My favorite part of this show is that Tim now has ambulance chasing lawyers as a sponsor

[@brizzlefarmizzle]

My favorite part is I live in Oregon and when I lived in Tampa 10 years ago morgan and Morgan did the same ads but only were in the Tampa area lol

[@AlexanderTheMedium]

What in the Jimmy McGil

[@Thee-_-Outlier]

That's how you know he's from a northeastern big city lol. In Philly I grew up watching local ambulance chasing lawyer commercials on local network TV. "RAND SPEAR...THE ACCIDENT LAWYER" duh duh duuuuuuh. It was either those commercials or vocational schools like Lincoln tech who played "eye of the tiger" during the commercial to inspire dead beats to get off the couch and enroll quickly before chronic apathy settles back in.

[@graizur]

I tried calling them. They sounded scared to make money. We're done. Economics is done. Capitalism doesn't want to play with anymore.

[@momog5615]

They know their audience

[@outofbody6797]

my adult saturday morning cartoons. TIM YOURE THE MAN

[@morontv1401]

honestly

[@DanELLAmanCHELLA]

Omg perfect analogy!

[@TheReal3lackSheep]

Facts😂

[@RebR612]

❤THIS !!! lol same here, I have to make up hours today and I was just WAITING to be able to turn this on 😂

[@DownHillgamer]

It's a knife fight out thrre

[@twodeepmatt]

Tim is America's dance mom.

[@WilliamPosner-oe6tj]

Underrated comment

[@DerpDerpityDerp]

It's a real knife fight out there.

[@paulfroelich1024]

...But that's life in the Big City.

[@BlazRa]

🗡️🤡🔪

[@jlshel42]

@@paulfroelich1024it’s just acid! You’d ruin anyone’s trip!

[@rawkingkong]

Late night knife fight

[@BigKevinSports]

Hahahaha! 😂

[@Chino-bk9fd]

please do a emergency podcast tim yes or yes???

[@barryballer]

Best journalist alive right now. Love you, Tim

[@milhousevanhouten3796]

Alex Jones and Tim Dillon should have a daily 1 hour rant show

[@Zov631]

“The fking chemicals turned Tim gay”

[@momog5615]

My dream

[@manbearpig7521]

​@@Zov631😂

[@calvinjackson5013]

💯💯💯

[@SconnerStudios]

Tim get Biden on the show. He'd make a terrible guest, but he'd be good for the brand, and that's all that really matters right?

[@TheThriftShopSampler]

Tim should get David Sachs on the show, if only because Sachs is the only guy giving Biden the benefit of the doubt.

[@TheThriftShopSampler]

*sacks

[@gerarddeery184]

I wish him well

[@dertythegrower]

Burisma Tshirts for all patreon members

[@dertythegrower]

An honestly good guest would be Palmer Luckey

[@drones7838]

The distant laughter in the background is what always gets me about Tim shows

[@LateNightRewrites]

I really appreciate that his staff gets paid in laughter. And honestly I'm tired of PETA complaining because they're crated in studio. What good would a monetary pay system be to people who can't leave their in-studio crates to spend it? Smh, people are too sensitive

[@cdavid469]

He’ll never let the laugher on camera again, he learned his lesson the first time

[@dustinh4175]

Its a.i

[@alex-qd6of]

What was the lesson...? ​@@cdavid469

[@aufkeinsen]

i just started wathcin the tim dillon show, i thought this was tucker carlson laughing in one episode being in the back or something haha its a very similar laugh

[@Jell0zz]

Can't believe we'll get another Tim Dillon show within 24 hours, but I bet you he'll do it ..

[@bryan973]

Holy crap will episode 400 be crazy!

[@quentinisbell869]

Who else is feverishly checking every hour for Tim to upload his update after todays events

[@keenanweind1780]

Instead of "Land's End", the NATO catalog is called "World's End"...

[@michaelhenderson643]

I need tims input on the situation with trump Emergency episode plz

[@Unz360]

He finally sums it up with "everyone's a fkin idiot. What do you want me to do?" 😂

[@philmac1994]

I need the emergency podcast after the rally incident!

[@215DMC]

That bit about the drugs not working and bad ecstasy from the early 2000s had me in tears last week.... and reminded me that guy still owes me 20 bucks!

[@JesusRealUncle]

same

[@AF_1892]

Oh God you idiots. X was never good. I wouldn't take pharmaceutical grade. Buying some trash on the street, you're not going to have a good time.

[@4363HASHMI]

When they dropped red phosphorous ecstacy turned into jib.. Ffs why do I know that 😒

[@wyland_6247]

@@4363HASHMII’m off of 3 Nashville Nibblers lookin to sniff some taint

[@stevendepietro-norbury]

You're owed 100 now Inflation. 😂

[@conora.1192]

Episode #400 is gonna be an absolute 💎

[@FRM101]

Tim Dillon is the only comedian whose show can alter my KZbin algorythm to include news about Russia and Charlotte, NC.

[@joeyjonesSoCal]

Tim out here preaching the gospel again. The real estate rant was 🔥🔥

[@brendanlatty2857]

Tim we need an emergency podcast after the Trump assassination attempt.

[@nateperrin1706]

Our lord gave us our daily bread. God bless Pope Jones and Pastor Dillon

[@koj876]

"Give Israel back to the Christians" LOL that fucking killed me 🤣🤣🤣

[@spncrbchmp88]

Well the Christains had it long before Islam was even a religion. Christians may have the best claim

[@somethingcreativeprobably5160]

​@@spncrbchmp88 wasn't your main boi Jesus a jew?

[@caleighhraee]

@@somethingcreativeprobably5160Jews don’t believe in Jesus Christ

[@trevor7355]

@@somethingcreativeprobably5160Do you know anything about Christianity?

[@straightaaaz7580]

Tim I was locked up for a while I’m happy to be back 💪🏼

[@ProducerKeylo]

Stay free!!

[@Sir_punchwood]

It was just business! He's a business man, he was doing business!

[@Steve-eq8iz]

Damn, Affleck's kid is speed running her schizo rant lol

[@manbearpig7521]

The other one is trans and made the announcement at grandpa's funeral

[@Hongobogologomo]

they don't call it hollyweird for nothin

[@Everythingismeaningless344]

I take care of my control freak Grandma and to hear Tim talk about them bitterly trying to force everything is so spot on it's unreal. Thank you Tim for thinking of plebs like me and helping me not off myself by making me laugh.

[@BillyBoggle]

Boy ep 400 will be historic

[@Jayke0theruler]

Congratulating Trump on this particular episode is wild timing Timmy D

[@Jassbusters]

President Dillon 🫡

[@taLLdavid33]

you look like Buu in your profile picture

[@davidkujawiak7987]

👑

[@monkeywang9972]

@@taLLdavid33😂😂😂

[@rickybobby2789]

The Ukraine gets comedian Putin. Why wouldn’t we deserve Tim

[@lizziereads3767]

No thank you. I’d like to reserve him for Press Secretary.

[@brianonthewater]

Show next week is gonna be lit

[@georgia2277hike]

I just discovered this podcast yesterday, and I'm an instant fan for life. I've binged 4 in a row, but sadly gotta get on with my day. Amazing how entertaining the truth is, lol

[@capsjukebox]

NATO lost its purpose the minute the USSR ceased to exist

[@MattttG3]

Spoken like a real booming zoomer Tell us you don't know much about geopolitics without telling us you don't know much about geopolitics

[@rickalarcon7988]

The amount of caffeine he must consume before three rants could probably kill a teenager. He's amazing.

[@Elgringo2180]

“You all know I like to talk about car accidents… morgan n morgan” 😂😂😂

[@estyx64]

Love watching Tim’s spiral into Alex jones 😂

[@joshraczka8006]

Tim emergency Ep needed.

[@Bawk85]

Yes! I came here to say this.

[@hotjoesummer]

WE NEED AN EMERGENCY EPISODE TIM

[@turnermd1302]

Next ep is gonna be a banger lol

[@ivanqlef]

*something insane happens Tim: Now, me personally, I like to see this...

[@2masterofpuppets2]

I gotta hear Tim's take on Dance Moms. Great Television😂😂

[@sylviablack4935]

We need an emergency episode, stat

[@lincolncappe3240]

If I choke and die listening to this while eating breakfast can I hold Tim liable?

[@HappyHappyCultists]

I’m sure Morgan and Morgan will take your call

[@nicolejohnson999]

🍖🍖🍖🍳🍳🍳🥐🥐

[@thefacelessquestion3333]

Call Morgan and Morgan

[@rikkys]

"Jennifer Garner she was in that show alias my mother used to watch it turned her into a schizophrenic." 😂

[@norasaysthings]

I laughed out loud at that part

[@TheJoshestWhite]

"When you see a baby go KABOOM, thats just a fake baby"

[@jessetheademan7087]

LMAO

[@Zov631]

That baby is Hamas

[@Zov631]

That baby is Hamas

[@deadjoker13]

​@@Zov631 where did the baby touch you

[@justkidding8304]

​@@deadjoker13on the ear dude, that was trump

[@lucasglowacki4683]

The 500 lb bombs versus the 2000 lb bombs is like when KitKat comes out with “fun size” in a bag and charges you double🤷🏻‍♂️😂

[@brizzlefarmizzle]

I'll sell you 100 500lb bombs but not 1 2000lb because I have class

[@williemasterofdestruction5339]

Always look at the price per oz or each. Family size usually costs more than the small packages, which don't go stale as fast. This message brought to you by your local tri-state chapter of satanists for the eradication of religion.✌️💚🍉

[@philsidock]

It's the military-industrial shrinkflation complex! 😂

[@le9335]

@@brizzlefarmizzlekeeps the taxes and Nazis down tho.

[@josephwilson971]

Hamas isn’t selling tickets like the eras tour😂😂😂😂😂

[@manbearpig7521]

😂

[@cctv5348]

Wonder what Tim will cover next week 🤔?

[@lilith3953]

My female cousin, who identifies as a lesbian, is engaged to marry a man, the father of her children. He identifies as bi-sexual, and I have no idea whether that means that he likes dudes or that he is open to the idea of sleeping with women who are pretending to be men and women pretending not to have a gender.

[@00SmileTime00]

A lesbian is just a woman who is attracted to women and being bi means you're attracted to both men and women. No idea where you got any of the rest of that from lol

[@fitzwits]

You genuinely can ruin anything. ​@00SmileTime00

[@MattttG3]

A real genetic disaster for those kids

[@MattttG3]

That is such a conservative statement. Seething with foam from that much negativity; who are you to tell them who they do and don't like?!

[@ceehads]

They’re just horny. And greedy.

[@Phoenix-gw3si]

“Diamonds are made under pressure” said every dance teacher ever lmao

[@Thee-_-Outlier]

They are also made from coal, so you can't really give that encouragement to a black dancer

[@GrillsBare]

if only Tim knew what would happen today . can't wait for next podcast .

[@StefsRockShow]

I love you. You’re my favorite. You can go from politics to dance moms, and you just “get it” ❤

[@jennaguelfi7442]

Timmy D we cant wait a week for your emergency broadcast on this weekends events.. LOVE from Australia x

[@acepierrechaka1782]

Show 400 is going to be insane

[@Badj4s]

I was kinda hoping to already find it

[@ambassador8524]

Muhahaha

[@iceblink7376]

well….

[@justkidding8304]

🤦 Tim really wanted to go big for episode 400

[@johnbauernfeind8116]

Nothing serious just Alex Jones

[@Tcarp2034]

We need a Tim, Ray, Mullen emergency broadcast

[@97jaj]

5:54 “they’ll come right to the studio and kill us?”

[@jessm8696]

😂

[@ChuckNasty961]

Need an emergency episode now!!!

[@askinperson2839]

God I can't wait for next weeks show now

[@amarvelous11]

THIS IS THE BEST POD EVER CREATED🎉🎉🎉

[@Neresdipity]

Yes or yes?

[@MajorCanada]

Sweet lord the next one will be legendary!!!

[@davidorlow8043]

I think we need an emergency episode

[@ambassador8524]

True that!

[@tnowl]

Tim Dillon Show 400 will be insane

[@Publiksquare]

We need an emergency pod!

[@lola-i2e]

Hell yes!

[@michaelhenderson643]

I think this universe is a simulation designed to create content for the tim dillon show

[@Pubslife]

Great comment!

[@manbearpig7521]

😂😂😂😂

[@manbearpig7521]

​@@Pubslifehe needs a book deal now

[@mattsawatzky5165]

Yes

[@deoduceassassin]

The next episode should be great

[@alejandrocruz1397]

Episode 400 finna be must see

[@AustinWalkerYT]

Emergency episode

[@ambassador8524]

I was hoping for it too 😕

[@jasondraughon8825]

Another instant hood classic.

[@hollandjane5785]

ok but they should make kevin spacey the president LMAOOOOO

[@eomohundro]

Dance moms reference is how we know tim is gay

[@jamesmurray4062]

The way he already knew that's where Jojo Siwa came from 😂.

[@alexabeyta3808]

In light of recent news regarding daddy trump, I cannot wait for next week's episode 😂😂

[@AverageGuyMovieReviews]

Tim is cookin on this one

[@JohnnyFx83]

He's 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

[@jlot9118]

Melania Trump would love Tim she should be on the show

[@BigBadMadDog.]

Please don't make us wait a whole week for another episode

[@snesleywipessqueegeeservices]

I almost imagined a sand covered Ray Kump come struggling over that sandbank with the icecreams for them both...

[@Juck_The_Fews]

Imagine the wheezing and squealing noises he'd be making

[@migah139]

i liked the part where he literally said "democracy" followed by a whisper with "never gonna happen" 🤣

[@Pubslife]

Lmao, I missed that!

[@blacknurse8589]

Praying for The Don, man oh man next wk will be unreal.

[@ytaccount9859]

need an emergency patreon

[@pauliseri935]

There was an old Dick Tracy villain called "Mumbles"

[@BirdManUnlimitedLove]

I only watch this for the Morgan & Morgan add.

[@AaronJ9610]

Oh man, after today you know the next episode is going to be absolutely insane😂

[@turnermd1302]

I can't fkn wait lol

[@DrakeRose]

Lol remember when he called that realtor in Missouri and asked if the kids got corporal punishment in the school district?

[@S0036-n4x]

wait, where is this

[@vagabond251]

That's amazing.

[@1veryfunnygirl]

😂😂😂

[@svkettlebelle1653]

I do remember that !! Classic

[@xxHockeyMonkey92xx]

Episode number? I think that was like a year ago?

[@MidnightMadeIt64]

Tim saying "FATTY BOOMBATTY" at exactly 4:20 just made my day 😂

[@micahtetreault855]

I can't work out and listen to tim. I will break out on laughter and drop a weight on my head.

[@alexio5498]

I tried at work but the employees saw me laugh out loud by myself so I stopped, tried listening to it while driving and almost crashed because I was laughing, I can only listen to him at home, possibly with some wine and a joint

[@ashleylauren000]

The carnival cruise bit sent me 😂😂

[@Jaret-Godawgs]

Can’t wait for the new episode already

[@markpats290]

Listening from a European country you're 100% on point !!! 👍🎯

[@kylelotsis5706]

Was golfing yesterday when I was told the news about trump. I said “I wish him well” then proceeded to hit my drive.

[@AustinWalkerYT]

Lmao

[@GeneralConsensusPod]

I know Tim is mostly being funny but it’s pretty crazy that amount of times he says something and I’m like Holy shit that’s actually facts…

[@waragainstavg]

Tim Dillon for Press Secretary

[@nicolejohnson999]

🤩 brilliant idea

[@birsay123]

I love the beach sunset backdrop behind Tim. The sunset colours vibe well with Tim’s skin tones and his shades are chill ❤

[@wonder0076]

Timmy just ranting about nothing is peak tim 😂😭😂

[@scotthodgson4823]

Tim is the man. I had to stop the podcast to catch my breath after the Dance Moms rant.😅

[@xanthoussouls]

Listening to this on the way to the Outer Banks with my girlfriend who got to meet the dance moms squad. Way to break through the Matrix Tim dog.

[@Juck_The_Fews]

You don't have a gf, Jeremiah

[@xanthoussouls]

@@Juck_The_Fews Haha that was 2009, we all have to stop invading scrubs and settle down eventually.

[@2122Super]

It's a real knife fight out there

[@joehennessy94]

We need an Emergency Episode Tim

[@hkm_865]

Come to think of it, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a black person on a sailboat

[@Nome_utente_generico]

Tim!! Emergency!

[@suzymac27]

❤Tim Keeps me SANE 😊😊😊😊