Bitlife but I always pick the worst option

Bitlife but I always pick the worst option, just like my real life :)
Twitch: / callmekevin
Twitter: / callmekevin1811
Instagram: / callmekevin1811
Second channel: / @donotcallmekevin
Stream Archive Channel: / @callmekevinstreamarch...
Editors:
Kippesoep001
TropicalFreeze2
FluffyroxGames
#CallMeKevin #Bitlife #Simulator

[@morosforhire4544]

I legit love how disgusted he became when he saw that “lick groin” was an option

[@_Kuma_]

His inner-catholic boy came out.

[@LaserBeem]

@@_Kuma_ um-

[@tashkent561]

@@_Kuma_ Flashbacks to catholic priests

[@Oopy_Doopy42069]

11:16 Your welcome.

[@Mr-Green0]

My reaction: 11:11

[@dr_n-t]

"My Father is Jimmy Wrong... My Mother is Katie Wrong..." Huh, I guess two Wrong's didn't make a right afterall

[@heavenlydusk]

Please get out you've been making puns for 12 hours

[@gremlin.x]

It's so hard being punny 😂

[@LL15onTT]

Take my like

[@FloridaGuy53]

But it does make a Hose A.

[@kaydengamingplayz1496]

his neighbor: Mr Wright Mrs wright Master Wright :I Am Wrong :Can you "Wright me a book" dum dum tshhhh

[@sepiasmith5065]

It's genuinely hilarious how good Kevin is at the prison escape minigame. He's gotten a lot of practice

[@noirfan4363]

Man knows prison like his home. Cuz its his home

[@thewanderingmistnull2451]

It's hard to trap the prison's architect in the prison.

[@2juiced]

Lmao it’s the Emulator Version of the escape minigame. Try doing it how it’s intended to and you’ll not believe it xd

[@breadbox3987]

@@2juiced its either a problem with ARM emulation or thats just how the android version is

[@gayusschwulius8490]

That's because of the fact that he plays something on a PC the was made for a phone with worse controls

[@adamj.58]

10:28 clown littering? Then he kills you? Sounds like Kevin playing Hitman to me

[@SuperShona2912]

"Father Time: The Greatest Hitman of All" is actually quite profound

[@KotaTheGreatest]

Also sounds like a movie

[@cantaloupesoup8830]

ikr? It's so poetic

[@flyingtoast27]

Who's paying him tho

[@cantaloupesoup8830]

He feeds off our mistakes

[@KeiZiahKnight]

@@flyingtoast27 mother nature probably

[@louis8487]

Imagine being rejected by the US army, they fecking take anyone

[@thatoneidiotfromdownthestr2337]

Anyone but Kevin they know what he would do with a gun

[@clickerkiller8]

Not in bitlife

[@louis8487]

@@clickerkiller8 Then bitllife is unrealistic

[@clickerkiller8]

@@louis8487 yeah but that's why Kevin got rejected he's playing bitlife

[@kabhes9040]

@JUSTIN SHARP I feel like you got recently rejected from US army.

[@ahobbit1273]

“Father Time, the greatest hitman of all” was such a powerful throwaway line

[@lisab9507]

"I'm going to call him Daddy Cockford-Balls" Had to check this wasn't another Super Seducer vid lol

[@apelord7310]

Every video Kevin makes is a super seducer video

[@rinqueen]

“BitLife but I always pick the worst option” ...isn’t that what you normally do?

[@itsbtwnyouandi]

that's just the description of the video lol

[@acabosasha]

Totally true! Just like last time when Kevin tried a lot to become a youtuber in Bitlife

[@devonesq.7533]

kevin irl is the only reality in which kevin succeeds he is one in a million

[@sirteshi3804]

Was about to comment this but I was this comment lol...

[@trans_and_gothicpiano2676]

Damn, you beat me to it

[@tuned2008]

St Default's High School. The education there is average.

[@bearjewify]

I like how default is now a Saint. I feel like I missed something, but I really don't want to know what happened here.

[@normalperson1642]

As she eats a cucumber.

[@jocelynfurr7554]

Doesn't that imply that he got syphilis from the principal?

[@hls6627]

St. Default’s Middle School, you mean

[@theofficialkermitthefrogyo2716]

@@notapplicable2968 because they are defaulted to think otherwise

[@abbeyurban7733]

"is there any jobs in the arts" was a little too real for me

[@konumbra]

it looked like his soul left his body when he said "Daddy Crockford-Balls"

[@EnergeticSpark63]

hey

[@SuperGravyMan]

“Wrong-Houle” is a very unfortunate surname combo

[@zenruh8150]

@Christopher Smith lol it's in the video it's his mom I think 😂

[@ThatBish380]

Worst Movie

[@that-possum-guy3209]

Oh yeah? I had a couple named Glasscock-Fingerwell once.

[@Vicioussnakeboy]

@@that-possum-guy3209 In my bitlife game, I had a hookup with an IRL friend I added in the game and got an STD I mean, it can't get worse

[@chonkfry6682]

Are we not going to talk about the mother changing her last name to Wrong-Houle after remarrying?

[@soggymoustache8515]

I don't get it

[@Fr0staX]

@@soggymoustache8515 Wrong-Houle= similar to Wrong-Hole.

[@myleslos9658]

Remarry me

[@lesfrog649]

LMFAO

[@iexistasaconstruct]

Mustve been salty

[@wonzaga2643]

“St. Default’s High School” nobody gonna talk about how Default is a literal saint in the CMKU

[@manologamerss5801]

Not sure how though, like she would not care about anyone, like what kind of saint is just neutral during any sort of massacre or seeing anyone suffer.

[@jacksonb.valentine8208]

As USMC vet (Marines), "I want to play with swords" definitely would've gotten you in lol

[@redscrunchie222]

Sounds like a great job option! /j

[@samthelion3925]

"Every single choice I get I'm gonna pick the worst option for me." Loving the consistency in your videos Kevin.

[@treblinka9530]

Gregory

[@Apple13556]

@@treblinka9530 yes

[@invisibleninja7873]

1k baBEE

[@stare4539]

frrr

[@caseyc3355]

“my happiness, health, and looks are so bad!” same

[@user-nb4wl9ob4l]

:( I'm sure you are great

[@caseyc3355]

@@user-nb4wl9ob4l awh thank you :,)

[@kliffalibur3497]

Yeah. You're fine just the way you are. Don't worry too much about it.

[@scavneo2972]

Good for you

[@deadaccount505]

Same

[@Tony36271]

Lisa: “Who will police, the police?” Kevin: “IDK, coast guard?”

[@aloskss]

Ha I’m dead.

[@metrolobster1054]

Ha I’m dead.

[@jon3845]

Ha I’m dead

[@dword1399]

Ha I'm dead.

[@ItchyNipple2400]

Ha im dead.

[@ConMan-ye4ou]

“How am I supposed to get out of my depression when an unusually heavy snowfall in Canada generates a month-long spell of avalanches killing 163 elk and 16 people?! …Why did they lead with the elk?” I keep rewinding that part over again and I can’t stop laughing.

[@ercon]

He should try an "always choosing the best option". Pretty sure he would still end up in jail for three trillion years

[@oZqdiac]

It’s a basic fact Every CallMeKevin BitLife life ends up in jail and possibly in debt too

[@hayatobun]

18:03 Fun fact: quinine, a substance which makes bitter drinks like Indian tonic bitter, is a known cure for malaria (although nowadays it's replaced by its synthetic analogues) - so malaria cure smoothie that Kevin talks about is not that farfetched! Another fun fact: British soldiers in African and Indian colonies were being given quinine in the form of tonic as a preventive medicine, but its bitterness was hard to deal with, so they used to mix it with alcohol - thus creating the famous combination of gin and tonic.

[@AlexisTwoLastNames]

this was cool. i love finding nuggets of info like this

[@cherrybeetree]

i like how they decided alcohol was the best option to reduce bitterness lmao

[@DrCandyStriper]

@@cherrybeetree also sugar which of why tonic is sweet and bitter.

[@gayusschwulius8490]

>although today it's replaced by its synthetic analogues Actually, it's still used in some cases when other medication doesn't work. Also, some poorer countries still use it because they can't afford synthetic medicine. It's a very effective drug, even 150 years later.

[@hayatobun]

@@gayusschwulius8490 thanks for expanding on that, what an impressive drug indeed

[@tobyelliott6175]

Kevin: “The Germans, they don’t hold a grudge” The stab in the back myth:

[@myname8509]

You mean " DIE DOLCHSTOẞLEGENDE"

[@ikilledcaptainalex666]

Meine Enttäuschung ist unermesslich und mein Tag ist ruiniert.

[@marioanothlp]

"Nibelungenlied" sitting in the corner....

[@vishwajitmahesh]

*quietly watches as 3 Germans slowly bring out knives*

[@vishwajitmahesh]

*quietly watches as 3 Germans slowly bring out knives*

[@SeanSMST]

Gotta love Kevin's subtle jokes, like putting the first second or so of Sweet Home Alabama when he's talking about giving the ring to the mother, love that. It made it way funnier compared to if he just mentioned the song since you recognise music instantly and it can catch you off guard.

[@callmeturg]

the penguin (ASMR) is such an icon

[@yourlocaljoyandhappiness8461]

He's gonna turn into the new mascot of the chanell i bet

[@whytho8856]

almost as tall, dark, handsome, and thicc as THE kevin himself

[@callmeturg]

@@yourlocaljoyandhappiness8461 i hope so

[@callmeturg]

@@whytho8856 heck yeah 🤟

[@malinalovegood1361]

So are you Call MeTurg

[@snailgirl355]

here’s a fun drinking game: take a shot every time kevin gets his poor bitlife character in jail 😳 edit: you’ll most likely get irish hammered

[@deadchild3927]

I would play but I don't fancy dying of alcohol poisoning

[@robertsteele541]

Sober, you mean?

[@eboyshrek3090]

@@robertsteele541 ur mum gay

[@wozaow]

@@eboyshrek3090 ur dad lesbian so proud of them for coming out 🏳️‍🌈

[@killlerkai18]

In America that's called being dead

[@Hoologramek]

Kevin pondering emigration to where would be the worst decision while hovering over "Poland" Me, a Pole: "Do it. He will never find happiness ever again"

[@radcrabart]

"it feels like i've lived an entire life and i'm only fifteen!!" yeah that's pretty accurate

[@ImmortuiRex74]

Is no one going to talk about how his parents were a police officer and an army enlistee? Like I feel that's an important detail for this character.

[@windermelon9567]

his mom's name after remarrying was literally "Wrong-Houle"

[@dopesickdog]

@@windermelon9567 o-oh... oh no

[@redscrunchie222]

OH GOD NO

[@jenkins4258]

Title: every option is the worst Me: so Where's the change?

[@JessicasASMR]

Kevin: The Germans don’t hold a grudge Uh... who’s gonna tell him?

[@wireshock4633]

* Alsace-Lorraine intensifies *

[@ComXDude]

*_Sudetenland intensifies_*

[@SasukeUchihaOfTheSound]

I'm about to hire a hitman. Take kevin out with our sparkling water and whatnot

[@louisupton3740]

Jesus christ died for our sins

[@Yeezus-mf5mt]

Was heißt grudge

[@justsomeeggsinapot1784]

Everybody gangsta till the clown pounds you in the chest

[@drmeat414]

It felt weird hearing him say “call me Kevin” in the intro 😂

[@Spencerinio5]

It's like waking up and you find your left leg has been lobbed off

[@louisupton3740]

Jesus christ died for our sins

[@TailsIsDisappointed]

Ah, yes... just like when Kevin played TellTales Walking Dead...

[@joaquinayling3244]

Classic

[@faithlessberserker5921]

I’m subbed to you. I think I see you in a lot of comments sections.

[@ligmaemperor7064]

just like my life

[@calvenmuswagon7445]

Now thats a game I havnt heard of in years

[@bodaciousdoggo8971]

Tails I’m a disappointment

[@blasianfj]

Kevin: "No luck finding the Blair witch so far" Ad: "Do you feel like you're being... watched?"

[@TruetOfficial]

“But... she’s my mom” *kevin queuing sweet home Alabama

[@legendzero365]

Did anyone else notice the high school is named after "St. Default", the patron saint of neutrality?

[@nicholasdelpizzo1594]

“Bitlife but I always pick the worst option” So just like every other Bitlife or choice based game video?

[@yourlocaljoyandhappiness8461]

Pretty much

[@rdclips3647]

More like in any game Kevin plays

[@UtopssAKAPJ]

basically every game Kevin plays

[@anko_dtm]

but this time it's his only goal

[@sarac9424]

I feel like these bitlife videos have taught me more about the dangers of STD's and not treating them than my sex ed or health classes ever did in high school 😅

[@WolfenGamer]

“Why did they lead with the elk?” It’s just Canada, we like animals more then we like people.

[@Zzantzanter]

That's exactly what i was thinking

[@lorettadunne210]

So much for "Canadian Hospitility".

[@MirrorHall_Clay]

Tbf, it's deserved

[@lylahsworld3930]

Yep, the elk and beavers and bears are much more important here

[@305backup]

Kevin: Trying all military branches Also Kevin: Skips Coast Guard

[@2023-Sucked]

Also Kevin: gets rejected by all of them

[@jasonantares3116]

I love how Asmr is slowly starting to become a bigger part of the main channel. Reading that back I realize how that sounds weird out of context, but I ain't clarifying it more!

[@TumblinWeeds]

“I graduated from high school. Oh I’m not depressed anymore” Literally same lol, turns out not spending 6 hours a day with bullies does wonders for your mental health. Also no cliques, no popularity contest, no weird ass hormones, no more acne, no useless classes that all the adults around you gaslight you into thinking “they teach you about life” and you’re just lazy, You can buy anything you want without asking, you get to decide your own schedule in college, you decide what’s good for *your own* mental health (and for some people, that *isn’t* forcefully shoving them into social situations and hoping they get used to it). So no, adulthood isn’t “so much worse than high school so quit complaining” like many people claim. Leaving that school fixed what 3 years of therapy couldn’t.

[@ArcanistShion]

You get a thumbs up from me, glad I’m not the only one who thinks this!

[@strawbman]

I was the same bro. I left school at 17 and became a tradesman, and it was the best decision I ever made

[@alioc3298]

Bruh how is the workplace any better

[@strawbman]

@@alioc3298 Depends what you do for a job probably

[@alioc3298]

@@strawbman I teach art classes at a paint and sip bar. I get to drink wine during work. I still don’t like working

[@annab4931]

5:12 that interview question was asked by an actual cat which is why he got the job by answering "sleep"

[@soggywaffles3020]

“But I pick every bad option” Literally every bit life video

[@treblinka9530]

Gregory

[@bigworld2724]

@@treblinka9530 Gregory

[@theo3854]

literally every video*

[@Brigadier88]

Last but not least, navy. Coast Guard: Am I a joke to you. Everyone: Yes.

[@thisisthebananaman3176]

Poor coast guard, you get barely more respect than the Marine Police.

[@flaming.river.]

The fact that only one minute and thirty seconds into the video Kevin passes up the opportunity to call his stepmom "Misses Gay" 💀💀💀

[@vanatan1]

Kevin: "Germans don't hold a grudge" Me: German Me: Are you sure about that?

[@pao6207]

The “but” titles are making a comeback!

[@Spencerinio5]

Yeah, he's done "doing something a little different"

[@Taggart00]

Kevin must know nothing about cats, as cats love sleep so being pasionate about sleep would be the best answer for understanding cat behavior.

[@LizzieNya]

11:05 just putting this timestamp here for future me. It's 12 am here and I bursted laughing so loud I woke up my mom c:

[@jamesbarras3834]

I just imagine a doctor coming out to call his daughter in for a vaccine and jusy having to shout “this is wrong”

[@KuueenKumi]

Better yet, the usual way they do it: "Wrong? This is Wrong?"

[@namelessonstage]

Can’t believe Kevin dedicated a bitlife video for my life :’)

[@amirhossienbehrouzi7992]

E

[@Barry.B.Benson]

“Bitlife but I always pick the worst option” So basically my life

[@JR-pf9in]

You chose to watch Kevin, that's never the wrong choice

[@evans8882]

Oh Barry, hello!

[@sidoniegabrielle269]

“essential oils, but in smoothie form” kevin pls enlighten us on the specific mlm you work for

[@HeatmetaI]

That SPLIT SECOND of Sweet Home Alabama at 9:28 got me GOOD

[@akaThaJordan]

THIS! For a second, scrolling through the comments, I thought no one had noticed. But I knew that would be giving myself too much credit lmao

[@willywonkers6868]

Me: returns from ad Kevin: Guess I'm dying then

[@RonnyBoy007]

Me 3/4 into the video "There's no murder in this video, I don't like it" me when it finally happens "Yaaaaaay"

[@Doilem]

The worst option for Nationality: American. True Kevin, True.

[@Madmax45247]

Don't know. I think I'd rather live in America rather than Syria or South Sudan.

[@timbrown3666]

@@Madmax45247 People in South Sudan live in actual stone age conditions. Anyone who complains about living in a first world country is too privileged to appreciate what they have imo

[@CraicDealer]

@@timbrown3666 tbh, compared to the rest of the developed world America is pretty terrible, on pretty much all measures, healthcare, education, employment rights ect. Saying America isn't as bad as Sudan kind of misses the point

[@timbrown3666]

@@CraicDealer The original comment didn't say it was the worst first world country though, it said it was the worst in the world. Which is objectively pretty false.

[@ArcanistShion]

@@CraicDealer also America isn’t nowhere near as bad as Sudan, this country is too big to be compared even.

[@justawhiskey41]

As a soldier, I love that even Kevin forgot the coast guard 😂

[@Moon_Religious]

Alternative title: Kevin struggling to juggle his addictions

[@benjustben7714]

F in the chat for all the people who have fallen asleep.

[@rdclips3647]

F

[@pcpt]

f

[@jaleel.4239]

F

[@themightyalmatysquirrel4228]

F

[@smurf1578]

I am asleep

[@sarahschulz7987]

kevin: picks every wrong option and becomes an animator me, an animator:

[@BuddyRitt]

Daddy Cockford-Balls is legit the funniest part of this video. Please enjoy it as much as I did. It's at 10:53 btw

[@draisaitls]

ASMR is an icon

[@Bellandora]

I love Kevin reacted with “Why is that an option?” in the attacking a classmate options.

[@pegas1ster]

"father time, the greatest hitman of them all"

[@aidenstaudt7473]

Why licking some groin count as an attack

[@RayvenLunaNite]

Sexual assault

[@chole2743]

Title: Bitlife but i always pick the wrost option Fans: When dosen't he pick the wrong option

[@gramor9816]

To my fellow photosensitive epileptics: 10:46-11:00 contains flashing imagery.

[@lorgaraurelian6676]

I relate to Kevin. I also look up symptoms online and freak myself out.

[@Reineerus_The_Rat]

Is no one going to talk about the fact that at 12:20 the job offer he got was from a place called The Balls Company?

[@user-ko8xy8nz2s]

For some reason kevin saying "she is a tough cookie" is Hilarious

[@habebamahmoud8451]

11:12 Kevin out of context

[@YouKnowItsFake]

Cheeky bit of midnight flashing lights 10:45 - 11:00. Might want to stick a warning for that

[@unholyfatman]

"Every single choice I get I'm gonna pick the worst option for me." So like every single one of your bit life videos lol

[@raptorjesus2516]

"Bitlife but I always pick the worst option" Sounds like a regular callmekevin video

[@eleanorneath530]

Kevin: It's my mom! **literally two notes play** Us, immediately knowing the song: oh lord not this

[@jasmin2003t]

17:22 "Who am I least likely to offend?" "The germans" Me a german: ...aight

[@Kelseylouise8]

I am hysterical at "AH Father Time, the greatest hitman of all" Lmaooo

[@kanesky]

Kevin, you don’t need to hurt yourself every video to prove your love for us… this game doesn’t even have sound

[@cowboyanxiety]

it actually does have sound! although, not very important sound...so you still have a point. lmao

[@danielburger2307]

When ur last name is Burger and Kevin makes fun of it 😢

[@katherinebrilowski]

[emigrating] “who will I least offend…. The Germans. They don’t hold a grudge” was the best subtle humor I have ever heard

[@printisdead1983]

I can literally hear kevin giggling at his own jokes while he does the edits lmao......"ill put my face on this furrie pic ..hehehehe."

[@pascusrex4152]

“BitLife but I always pick the worst option” *starts in the US* ah I see this man knows how to choose poorly!

[@laurendyer2838]

1:32 Massive missed opportunity to have called the stepmother “Mrs Gay” Like come on Kevin, it would’ve been hilarious! Actually, that would make picking it the right decision... so nevermind

[@Stevie37]

Also, his mom became Mrs. Wrong-Houle...

[@laurendyer2838]

@@Stevie37 oh my god you’re right I take back everything I said, that’s the best name

[@vengefuldeth]

How does this game hate Kevin so much that it will let a clown beat him to death xD

[@totallynothatguy1698]

I died when he said he couldn't marry someone because she was his mom and "Sweet home Alabama" started playing

[@officialblimp]

seeing the name “THIS IS Hux” always makes me laugh

[@SlightRecoiI]

Watching Kevin's videos is like taking antidepressants.

[@coylers100]

Ive been watching these bit life vids last few days and ive never laughed as much. Love your humour. Really helping with this lockdown. Please keep up the good content. 😁😁

[@Farlindo1945]

Hey Kevin! I just wanna say THANK YOU, man. Not wanting to be kinda "cliche", but at this moment of my life, your videos are one of the few things that make me laugh. So, really... Thanks Kevin! Wish the best for you

[@BJ-jh5is]

Kevin: I’m going to pick the worst option available Me: So every time you play bitlife 😆

[@elmirdays]

Yes I needed this after a horrible day! 🙌🏻😩😄

[@sagefournier2725]

Saame

[@calebsmith1548]

17:30 Glad you didn't choose Cuba, you sure have a *lot* of Cuban fans because Western internet is *so* accessible there

[@Kandranos699]

Really enjoyed the editing on this one! Great video! Loved every second of it

[@kylekung2455]

I want to pretend each bit life character he plays, have some sort of telepathic influence to someone in the multi verse to make the same decisions

[@feelinglostinthepeople]

Lmao the mom's name is Katie Wrong-Houle. Guess she's always having a rough time 🤣

[@CJ-qw4og]

7:37 lmao wow Amara from the Ring and The Blair’s Witch must be twins

[@thatkidactor]

Did anyone notice that Kevin put Samara from The Ring instead of the Blair Witch when he was making a joke about searching for her? Lmao