body positivity because you're ✨BEAUTIFUL✨

[@zaraandrews600]

*Me nodding in agreement when Shaaba calls herself a smoking hot chocolate snack* Never a truer word said!

[@desmondweber3683]

☕🍫

[@sydneymcdaniel3388]

Very much true 👍😍

[@IzzaKoshkina]

As a trans woman, the nose part made me feel so much better about myself, omg. I think maybe I should look at more body positivity content. Thanks, queen 👑💜

[@ghjgme]

I have a question based on how you worded your statement, if that's ok. Do you believe your nose to be big because you're trans? Is there some correlation that cis women are supposed to have small noses? I am only curious as this is not a feature that gets talked about as much. I know that I have some friends that have mentioned feeling more validated when cis women talk about body parts they are self conscious about.

[@IzzaKoshkina]

@ghjgme It's both, since afaik testosterone cause cartilage to grow at a greater rate, or something to that regard. And I suppose I have/had an image of cis woman having smaller noses. (Even though I know a few cis women in my family with larger noses).

[@SLYKM]

@@ghjgme All women, even cis women, worry about having big noses bc it's not seen as feminine. In another screwed up level,a lot of POC have an issue with big noses bc of stigma towards them for their racial characteristics (mainly Jews and black people). Big noses are surprisingly looked down upon and I don't get it personally, but the stigma explains it. Its really crappy.

[@ghjgme]

@@IzzaKoshkina I appreciate your reply. I've never heard this. I know rhinoplasty is common, because there is a lot of social stigma attached to nose size and shape (I usually assume this is rooted in racism), never really thought of a hormonal or gender impact. Anecdotally, my (cis) husband has a tiny upturned nose, doesn't even need to tilt his head to kiss me 🤷

[@GhostOfThisHouse]

i think it's also rooted in kindchenschema . Women are 'supposed' to have small noses, flat brow ridges, big foreheads, big eyes, plump lips and hairless bodies because it makes them look 'young'. It's also why we find certain animals cute, because they have features that subconsciously remind us of babies.

[@barbaram5769]

I cannot emphasise how much the phrase "strawberry legs" changed my life and perspective. I've always hated them (I'm still not overly thrilled by them) and I used to only ever wear clothes that covered my legs entirely, even sweating in Summer. In secondary school, we were getting ready for PE when I mentioned how I hated having to wear the PE shorts because of my "chicken thighs". That's when one of my friends, who I lost contact with since but miss dearly, said "noooo! Are you kidding me?! Chicken thighs! You're so cute, they're strawberry legs, you're like a little strawberry" and it still makes me well up. I wear shorts, short skirts, and swimsuits now with pride and I remember "strawberry legs" every time.

[@s0up_1223]

Omg now I want to draw a strawberry person

[@alistaircaradec2180]

Oh man! I remember being that "first girl to get boobs" in school. (I'm a trans guy.) One time, in PE, we were running laps around the football field, and two girls caught up to me. "Ha! Might be time to start wearing bras, huh?" I WAS wearing a bra, and I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me. Funny thing is, a year or so later, I got laughed at by some guy at recess for being flat-chested. Guess my baggy jumper was doing its job. All this to say, when it comes to growing boobs while in school, you're basically damned if you do, damned if you don't...

[@Peachessssss13]

The other thing is that skinny people also don’t just want to be skinnier. when I was 7 I hated how skinny I was I just wanted to gain more weight. I would’ve done anything to not be able to see my ribs. and I was body shamed so much being told I was too flat and skinny that I wanted to die. so yea it’s not always that we want to be skinner believe it or not. It’s really hard because skinny people always get pushed out of body positivity and told that we aren’t aloud to be insecure and that we don’t suffer. But we get body shamed just as much too.

[@stacylitwin1466]

100%! I got made fun of for having an eating disorder when I didn't just because everyone made fun of how skinny I was, fast forward to my twenties when I realized that I have several eating disorders and that is part of the reason that I was never able to put on weight yet was always told how good I looked when I was struggling to gain weight, it is crazy

[@LouforYous]

Yupppppp exactly

[@InThisEssayIWill...]

Same! Can't tell you how many times I've heard string bean or chicken legs.. just to name a few.. one of the Indian girls in my friend group was just so curvy and cute and I would have killed to look like her.. I have more stretch marks from growing boobs than I got from growing a baby..

[@meghantrimble6120]

I wanted to say this, too! As a teen, I was quite skinny, with a flat chest and small butt. People would often point out how skinny I was (in a negative way), and ask me if I had an eating disorder. 🙃 I was just a small person with a fast metabolism. I desperately wanted curves, larger boobs, a larger butt. Now that I'm older, my metabolism is slowing down and I'm not as thin as I used to be. Still learning to love my body no matter what size I am.

[@aristobat]

yes, thank you for this! I was thinking the same thing. My whole life I've been really really tiny to the point where people assume I'm 3-5 years younger than I actually am and it sucks. It's hard to feel attractive when you're constantly infantilized. I used to really struggle with the idea that I wasn't allowed to have a hard time with my size, but years later and I'm 21 and still struggling with my size like I have my whole life

[@basketchaos]

As a small child, I was always told how conventionally beautiful I was. As I got older, those same people found more and more things to complain about-when I gained weight, my family told me I should lose it; when new people met me, they told me I was too skinny and needed to eat. Being caught between so many people telling me how to reshape my body just highlighted for me that it’s impossible to please everyone, so just focus on your own comfort first and foremost 💜

[@Idkuprobdontknowme]

I didn't want this video to be over!! I was genuinely sad when I realised it was the end ;-:

[@shaaba]

I’ll do more! x

[@InThisEssayIWill...]

I struggle with body positivity, but body neutrality is a lot easier for me to achieve. Thanking my body for it's service instead of praising it for it's existence is more my speed. But hopefully with time I'll get there

[@ipyu4705]

I am regaining the weight I had lost after my depression right now (probably because of stress due to work, separation etc) and I really needed this. When I called my mother today and asked, crying, if she didnt found me ugly, she said "No, but losing weight sure wouldnt hurt." I dont know why I called her since she was the one during my depression giving me advice to eat "healthier" every f** time I saw her even when I told her how hurtfull it was, how messed up it was for all my life, but I hoped she had changed ... Thank you so much for this video, its such a perfect timing in my life.

[@VeryGoodDad]

I'm so sorry ❤️ don't let it get you down (easier said than done), some people just don't understand and you deserve better than that treatment

[@missnaomi613]

Please accept some mama hugs. ❤🧡💛💚💙💜

[@akitokutikabanae7010]

I'm in the same exact timing. The only difference is that i was kinda anorexic and then i became hyperphagic. So I was "too skinny" and now i am "too fat". People were always telling me "that's great you're gaining weight" and now they are... "Well, could be great to lose a bit ?" (Mostly my mum. Which i live with) Ans i'm so Furious for that. They made me inconfortable with my body when i was skinnier (i was feeling really great, no dysphoria, pretty less dysmorphobia) and now they dont like because i'm fat ? That's your problem buddies, not mine. The only thing I want is to feel great in my body. Not to seem good in their eyes. I'm sure you're beautiful. No, I KNOW you're beautiful. You were, you are, and you will be, no matter what. Sending you love sibling ❤️❤️

[@ipyu4705]

Thanks everyone

[@hexonyou]

I'm so sorry

[@noooodianoodles]

As a disabled person I find it hard to love my body sometimes. But I have to remember that I am doing my best and my body is the very thing that helps me do so!! Love yourself, you deserve it!! ❤

[@amyt3949]

Thanks for sharing, it's tough but finding love for our bodies and the labels we live with (CP). I'm almost 41 it's getting easier at last. I'm joining a dating app to enjoy the mess and mayhem of dating/meeting new peeps! Even when the wheels scare many (including myself) off trying. Society and sadly those who are meant to love us, often damage and punish our differences but we are all worthy of self love, compassion, joy, intimacy and a body that we love in spite of its pain and complications we often live with. Find people and things that allow you to live in authenticity even briefly, life begins to give you a of the myriad of wondrous opportunities on offer. Anyone reading this is worthy has a fantabulous body, mind and is miraculously you!♿🏳‍🌈🌏✌

[@noooodianoodles]

@@amyt3949 thank you for sharing as well! Good luck on the dating apps!

[@flynn5109]

My very blunt grandma's favourite saying was "If it suits the wearer, bugger the starer!!" and would always say this when she took me and my sister shopping when we were younger. This really helped me feel confident in my body when I was growing up and wear whatever the hell I wanted to.

[@mansikkapoika]

I really agree on not finding many body positive vids of guys and nb people and I wish there were more!! But Ezra, the last person in the video, is trans and he has other videos like that too and he's over all a super positive person :) It sucks how we're programmed to hate our bodies as soon as we're aware of them. No one is born hating themselves. As a trans guy I've had a rough relationship with my body. It was always a constant fight with feeling uncomfortable and hating the way I looked and struggling to fit into the things that were expected from me growing up as a girl. It was especially bad just before I came out. I tried to make myself into what other people wanted me to be. I fucking hated myself. Honestly still do. I felt like I wasn't good enough or pretty enough to be a girl and struggled with accepting that I'm a man. I've been a lot happier after I came out. Started doing things that made me feel better, not things that other people wanted me to do. It's been 6 years and I've been learning how to love myself as I am. Most days I don't but I'm trying. It's a mixture of dysphoria and body dysmorphia and dealing with years of bullying. It often feels like I'll never truly be able to love my body but I'm hoping I'm wrong haha. Sorry for rambling. Thank you for making this video, it made me smile :) You're awesome, keep being you ♡

[@VeryGoodDad]

I've felt this exact same way. It's so confusing. Sending love ❤️

[@StudlyFudd13]

I am at the start of your journey but only 6 months in since I came out as a transman. It's rough, but we'll both make it.

[@GlamourNNail]

I have a larger nose. As a woman, I'm not supposed to like it. But when I look in the mirror I see my grandfather's nose. He passed away with I was a teen, but here I am almost 30 years later and i can see a part of him every time I look at my own face. Those bits we hate are pieces of the past. Gifts from the ones who have gone before.

[@missnaomi613]

I love, love, love this! Thank you, Dr. Shaaba! *I am currently 51 years old. If I live as long as I hope to, I'm not even halfway there yet. *I have significant hair loss (may or may not be reversible.) *I am overweight, as in, not the healthiest weight for me. (Being kind to me as I work on that.) *My boobs and belly are droopy and jiggly. *I have a Cesarean scar. * My body hair is...dark and persistent. *I have some crinkles around my eyes. *Don't even get me started about my teeth! *I really don't care that much about how this shell looks, except where it indicates a health concern. *I don't need to look like I'm in my 20's. I'm not. I'm still beautiful. *I trust I'll find the right partner for me one day. Guy? Gal? Non-binary pal? Whatever. Anyway, they'll probably have a lot of the same physical "imperfections" that I do, and I DON'T CARE A BIT. Blessed day/night to all!🙏❤🏳‍🌈🏳‍⚧

[@CuppycakeWillow]

I'm turning 40 in August and I'm a chubby potato but when the warm weather comes I'm in mid-thigh shorts and crop tops because I can be a summery, chubby potato! We're all beautiful inside and out, and society needs to stfu and just let us all be happy.

[@rosejones8058]

I recently turned 55 and you know, it's great. I'm not totally thrilled with the bum-and-tum, or backpain, or my teeth, but some of the tum came from having 2 kids (1 getting stuck and needing a c-sec) and my kids are fabulous. The annoying persistent backpack reminds me how lucky I am to have so little pain and such good health. As for my teeth they only show in photos I am laughing in...all good...

[@TheTangentExpress]

15:48 Nooononoonono Shaaba, being a pillow is the BEST FEELING!!! People laying their head on you is AWESOME. It doesn't even necessarily have to do with being fat, it's just so fulfilling to know people are that relaxed with you.

[@WithoutAnAnchor]

Honestly the fact that you're taken aback by people raising things like teeth and noses as points of insecurity shows how redundant all of these beauty standards are! The things I've always been most insecure about, some people don't even register which is suuuuuuuper refreshing! Now I'm in the second half of my 20s, I'm learning to love my nose which I share with the German half of my family and links me to my Nothern European heritage as well as my teeth which allow me to smile a smile that makes that same German family always comment on how much I remind them of my late Great Aunt who was a bit of a legend in my family! Thanks for sharing the love, Shaaba :)

[@shirleyjeanpilger3482]

I just read an article by a doctor debunking BMI for weight management. It was never intended for that use and actually is misleading. I have a sigh on my front door that says "Be your own kind of beautiful!" Makes me feel good when I get home and others have said it makes them feel good too

[@Magic_Skeleton]

Yes!!! I think my doctors meant well but were misusing BMI because they always said I was a healthy weight, but as soon as i moved out of an abusive situation I gained 30lb without getting taller (or chubby)... 🤨

[@Patr0chilles_001]

some schools still do the whole changing together thing and i just think it's so weirddd and wrong they do it in high schools and primary schools

[@realbrooklyn2093]

My mum always felt self-conscious about her "strawberry legs", so as I grew up and developed more leg hair and started shaving, I too began to dislike my "strawberry legs". I just realized I still feel weird about my legs sometimes. This video inspires me to change my mind.

[@Trina88]

When I was in my late 20's, one of my older sisters' friends said to me 'oh just you wait, your 30's are the best years!' and oooooh my god was she right! I'm 34 and having the BEST time everrrr. It must just get better from here 🥳🤩

[@EmoNightDragon]

My mom has struggled a lot with her body image, and will at times say things that are very negative about herself, especially now that she's feeling the effects of aging. Then she'll make a disclaimer that "oh, this doesn't apply to you, because you're young and active, it's me that's unhealthy and old and have slow metabolism". As her daughter, this has definitely affected me as well, and I am wary of the signs of developing an ED myself. (I'm doing generally well with this now, focusing on staying active and eating "healthier" because it FEELS GOOD for my body and mind). And I also feel this defiance, that no, I will "age gracefully" by taking care of my body and accepting the changes when I get older. And I'll keep wearing whatever I want and become this cool, fun, stylish, quirky and wise old lady. That's the dream.

[@macaronmoon]

I want to have a healthier outlook on aging and be able to pass on that positivity so that hopefully other younger people won't have this fear of aging and their bodies changing

[@SarahHalina]

Body positivity is such an important thing. Society has told us what constitutes as beautiful for so long that people (mainly, but not exclusively, teens) feel like if they don't fit that particular mould, they aren't beautiful. It's just not true. Everyone is beautiful and it's great to see people putting their beautiful and real selves out there and hopefully if anyone is struggling with how they look, they can see that beauty comes in all shapes, sizes and colours and hopefully can see themselves as beautiful too. Also body positivity is needed for EVERYONE regardless of who you are.

[@Jigglypowerpuffgirl]

I’ll be 30 this year and I’m so excited! I’m more confident in my body now than I was at 20. I wear what I want. Cut my hair the way I want. Eat delicious food that I want and gives me energy to run around the way I want. I’ve grown into my nose 😂 I feel like 30 will be the best decade yet.

[@ATransBoi]

The teeth part is totally a regular thing, and I have dysphoria over my teeth. I had braces for a while which made them straight, but that’s not the problem I have with them. Over COVID lockdown I stopped taking care of myself as much and was having so much coffee to get through the day that I have yellowed teeth a bit and my family makes horrible comments about them, and no matter what I do to brush or floss now, they’re stained. I can’t get whitening strips yet and I’m scared of the sensitivity I’ll get after because I already have sensitive and damaged teeth.

[@gianni2003]

I feel the teeth part so much. Not only the first tooth to fall off, grew back crooked (and for this I have to put on braces one day and I'm scared since I heard it's painful as hell), but then half of my upper teeth row is more far back than the other and for the rest, they're really built badly and honestly I hate how they look and I wonder if it is affecting my voice. It sounds too childish for someone who's gonna be 20 in only a few months. Also, I honestly don't really like how skinny I am. Having a fast metabolism was a nice flex, but now I really don't like how I look on this regard. I'm even underweight. It's a miracle that somehow I hardly get sick at this point. I honestly find a bit hard to love my body for these reasons, but hopefully I can come around to that, because I'm tired of seeing myself as ugly

[@melissacoviello2886]

Love this so much. My mom has a lot of negative self talk, especially about her body. Over Christmas she made some very inappropriate comments to my sister and I about our weight and the weight of our kids, excluding 2 of them. I told her if she made any body shaming comments about anyone in front of my kids that we would pack up and leave. Feeling good about your body is hard enough without negative talk from a parent or grandparent. I’ve called her out before for saying something about my sister being willing to wear a bikini on the beach in Hawaii. I told her point blank, isn’t awesome that she wasn’t affected by body shaming comments the way her and I were. I stopped wearing regular bathing suits at 13 when I was 103 pounds and wore a size 3 (cause my butt was so big, which I love now). But back then I was embarrassed to have stretch marks and cellulite. I didn’t know that most people had them. I do wish maybe I was a few pounds less than I am, BUT I do value my body for all that it has done and mostly I have positive self talk, especially because I grew 4 humans in a 10 year span of time.

[@patriciaadolfsson214]

I still remember to this day how I felt when during my anual checkup with the school nurse she evaluated me according to the bmi scale and told me I was on the edge of being obese and had to diet and loose weight. This was during a time that I actually was pretty active and played a lot of football etc, so I wasn't unhealthy at the time. Looking back I know that now, but it ruined a lot for me when it comes to my relationship with food and exercise. It was the first time I cried like that in front of family members, I started eating only salads for most meals and got obsessed with my weight. I was eleven.

[@BiggerinRealLife]

I get body dysmorphophobia from my breasts. It's really hard. Thanks for talking about it.

[@bambino05]

I used to want a nose job, to the point that I could barely leave the house. At the start of this year, I noticed that my daughter has my nose, she is the most beautiful human I've ever seen and now I can't possibly think of changing it, if I change it I'll instill in her that her nose isn't beautiful. She is the most beautiful and I never want her to feel like that. Also I'm a size 8ish, according to my weight and bmi, I'm overweight. The comments I get from real people are that I'm either a healthy weight or underweight. Weight is literally just a number, the only time it might matter is in a doctor setting for medication

[@alex_is_back17]

When I was in 8th grade we got a GRADE on our BMI level in PE!!!! There was only like 5 girls who “past” and they were praised :/

[@SuspectMear]

TW// BDD AND EDs I started crying at this as a trans person with body dysmorphia and eating disorders. Your content makes me feel so much more loved and safe than I would otherwise. Thank you for constantly spreading positivity and making the world a better place. ❤

[@akitokutikabanae7010]

Same here sibling, sending you love ❤️❤️ we are beautiful ❤️

[@barrylangille3523]

Thank you for including a body positivity clip for men! Body image issues exist for men, and it needs to be recognized, even though the prejudices aren't as bad.

[@LiliGrosserova]

I just want to mention that even if someone decides to change their body/face through plastic surgery because it makes them feel better, that's okay too. As long as they're healthy and happy :)

[@rchhcsupernova]

There is a good argument against "body positivity bc our body does so much for me". I as a fully able, athletic healthy person am grateful for what my body does and lets me do and enjoy. Buy for some that is not the case, specially for those with terminal or chronic illnesses, their bodies can stop them from enjoying, or have them in pain and they are justifiably angry and that is fine. I am sure you (Shaaba) know and are aware as you know Jessica KF and she has talked about this, but for anyone reading that is something to think about.

[@thepickleboys347]

I really needed this today. I’ve been working on loving myself and my body, which has been easier at some times than others. My husband tells me all the time that I’m beautiful, and I wish I could see it. I just started watching your videos, and I’ve been going through them obsessively! I love your content, thank you for making it. ❤

[@shaaba]

best of luck with your self love journey sweet! It’s okay to not a million percent love yourself all the time, but it is good practice to avoid giving yourself a hard time 💛

[@williamswindler105]

CW for eating disorders I always feel so guilty watching videos that are about body positivity because of all the shit I do. Every day, no matter how hungry I am, I try to eat next to nothing. I try to limit myself to one meal a day if I can and try to snack once. It's so unhealthy. And I hate it. I hate the never ending headaches. The pain. But I hate the thought of what I would look like if I ate more than I do already more. And anytime I eat, though I never do, the thought of throwing it back up is in my mind. Every time I watch these videos, I'm so happy for the people in them. Loving themselves. Yet I know I can't do the same. I'm in the 10th grade. I started doing this shit in the 6th. And while I try to have a positive view of myself, it's so hard.

[@RunchuWombat]

reading this made me really emotional because i know so many people who have had similar struggles. please know that you aren’t alone and that you will get through this

[@Maria241097]

Thank you so much for this video. Content like this is beyond meaningful. I especially loved that few seconds about BMI. For context, most of my life, I've been about 20% heavier than what BMI suggests as healthy, putting me in the overweight bracket. That made me feel like a whale. But now, when I look at my photos from my teenage years, I looked normal, I wasn't taller, or fatter than any of my classmates. However, this isn't the worst part. The worst part is that my family doctor seeing my weight (just based on the number) decided that my weight is unhealthy, and wrote me a referral to a weight loss sanatorium, and I listened to him. I went there for 4 weeks and lost about 5kg. And then came home and gained 10kg. I was 12 at the time. This repeated 3 more times. The result now (25) is that I'm in the BMI obese bracket and I actually look overweight, with a bonus eating disorder (the stress eating kind). Your video made me feel happier than any therapist before.

[@heather9130]

Wow what great timing for this video. I just told my husband that I've been feeling unattractive and unworthy recently. I still have the belly from having a baby over a year ago at 36, and we're trying again soon. I do not feel like I did a good job of making my body fit enough to handle another pregnancy. And that's okay! My partner is so supportive, and my son thinks I'm doing an amazing job. This video is so positive and kind, I'm going to return to it when I feel down.

[@elvendorkthegreat]

I saw this this morning and thought it would just make me feel more dysmorphic so I didn’t watch it. Got back home this afternoon after being harassed significantly more than usual and I actually decided to watch this. Surprisingly, I now feel so much better. Thank you.

[@SpookyRooRiku]

Really needed this. Yesterday was doing some clearing out and found a old jumper that I wore after just having my son 7 years ago and it was a UK size 10 and remembered how I was told I was fat by everyone and how I needed to loose weight n I believed them. Now I'm double that size just wishing I had loved myself more back then and learning how to love myself now.

[@Eliza-xd5ck]

Body neutrality is the way to goooo

[@grumpywitch42]

I'm 54 and yeah, have many regrets about not loving myself when I was younger. But I do now and I love that younger version of me. So, she's nurtured and I'm nurtured. I'm not on TikTok but I do follow body pos folks on Instagram. Lots of variety of ages come along in my feed.

[@Jasmyne_J]

Sadly at alot of schools they still have locker rooms where you change, I went to one of those for like 2 weeks and I hated it (not just for those reasons but also I hate changing in front of others, it would take me a while because I would grab my stuff and go into a bathroom stall instead)

[@rowanrobbins]

When I was a lot younger, I wanted to have darker skin because I felt it was more attractive and interesting. I still believe that darker skinned folks are beautiful. All the different shades and nuances, if that makes sense! We all have different shapes and that is ok. Also, people with Albinism are beautiful. Don't listen to mean people and bullies. Many have a need to pull others down to lift themselves up. Be well, everyone!

[@nyx1642]

cw: ed/disordered eating So I struggle a lot with my body image. Not only am I trans (dysphoria and dysmorphia, such a fun pair), but since I'm trans masc, I feel pressured to to women's beauty standards, and I've gone a bit without , or eating very little, and this stuff is really wonderful and helpful. And I totally agree, we need more for men and enbies, bc the women's stuff makes me a bit dysphoric to relate to.

[@Jordyb33123]

Thank you for this. I had such expectations of being healthy this year and as soon as I got back after new years my boiler broke and I had to shed out thousands to replace. Then when I picked myself back up, my dad had a stroke. Then as my dad is still is in hospital recovering my mum went into hospital tonight. I’ve hated myself even more in the last month because I feel weak for needing food for comfort and still not looking how I want to. Aiming for body neutrality one step at a time

[@autumn7143]

Thank you for this!!! I have an hourglass figure with extra minutes, and my hubby loves me with it all. I’ve been shamed for my size many times in my life. I’m 44 and I have a 21 year old daughter. I have always been big. I even went to a weight loss camp as a twelve year old because my family thought I needed it. My teeth aren’t bad, but not whitened. I’ve also suffered from severe back issues all of my adult life. My favorite feature is my hazel eyes. Sometimes they’re brown, sometimes they’re green. Most of the time there’s brown on the inside and then go out to green around the outside.

[@mariiii3594]

“An hourglass figure with extra minutes” I wanna still that expression it’s *_so cute_*

[@autumn7143]

@@mariiii3594 please do. I think we all need ways to describe ourselves when we don’t fit the beauty standard and have more to love.

[@thingy164]

Shaaba, THANK YOU for highlighting how hard it is to find body positivity content for men. As a young man who’s struggled with my self image I know first hand how difficult it can be to find content like that, and how it felt that in the ways of representation there was always 3 categories, hyper skinny, hyper muscular or having a large tummy. It felt that any man represented anywhere always fell into one of these 3 and even irl there were very little people who didn’t. With being someone who always had a tummy but not one that was quite significant, I held a lot of self confidence issues and very much struggled to love myself however at the exact same time I felt guilty if I spoke out about this because there were always bigger people around me and it made me feel like I was talking over them. After a while now I am in a position where I don’t have negative feelings about my body and am much more confident in myself, but the search for body positive content for men is still incredibly difficult and it seems that the only people providing it are from hyper muscular men which again can be helpful but is limited when it comes to people seeing themselves in them.

[@jadecoyle990]

What also really bothers me about BMI is when you have to pay life insurance... I'm literally paying more because I don't fit this bizarre, archaic system. I went through a mortgage advisor who had a team to sort out all the insurances too, and the questions I was asked was literally 'what size clothes do you wear?', 'how much do you weigh?' and 'how all are you?', I'm only 5ft2", so anything over 8st is considered 'overweight' which is considered negative/bad, and therefore I have to pay more in life insurance, even though at the time I went to the gym twice a week, and trained in karate (I'm a 2nd dan black belt) twice a week. It's completely backwards.

[@sweariefaerie9621]

Girl, I adore you so much. I love that you're wearing crop tops before your 30s. I'm 36, and I only just developed the confidence to wear them last year. I sincerely hope you never lose that confidence, and that your kids will develop it early, should you ever become a momma. Let the world ever be inspired by us cuddly goddesses. 🥰

[@mspSelSil]

When I was a kid I was really skinny to the point everyone commented on it. Teachers, Neighbors, relatives... I even was too lightweight to go on the bungee trampoline while my friend was able to go :( Until fifth grade. Then people suddenly called me fat? Especially my thighs. It was really weird going from "too skinny" to "too fat". Even today I still struggle with this. I don't actively do anything to lose weight but when I notice I did lose some I get happy. And then I feel bad for being happy about it because it could come back any time.

[@SpringStarFangirl]

When you mentioned the a-line skirts and baggy shirts I felt like I had to say this. I am autistic. I feel neutral about my body- it exists and it does what it's supposed to do. I personally generally prefer looser clothing because it's more comfortable to me. I wear tighter clothing occasionally, but generally they have to be of very specific fabrics because of my texture sensitivity. True beauty comes in comfort. Even if it's not what the world tells you you should be wearing, if you're comfortable, you're beautiful. We should not be torturing ourselves for outdated and ridiculous beauty standards.

[@calsannepotgieter4200]

For me my body image has been greatly influenced by my mental health. When I was in my late teens and early 20s while I met society's standards I felt hideous inside and nothing I did on the outside seemed to change that. After a number of breakdowns, therapy and medication my mental health has greatly improved. And now I do not so closely match societal norms but I am happy with my inside and outside now. And I don't care so much what other people think. If they would be happy for me to hurt myself to meet a moving target of beauty they are not people that I want in my life anyway.

[@barbaram5769]

I cannot tell you how perfectly timed this video upload was. Thankyou for helping me finish my bowl of noodles today. I may even get ice cream (I probably won't but those noodles were dry af, I'm not a good cook). Love you and all you do Shaaba ❤

[@shaaba]

let me know if you go for the ice cream cutie, I’ll have one too! x

[@Cascadeis]

Reading the comments here is making me cry. ❤ I love my body, it’s amazing and perfect and strong (just not in a physical way). But it took a long way for me to get to that point - I’ve been where so many of these commentators are. For me things started to change when I had my first child, all of a sudden my “big” tummy was just proof of how amazing my body was and how many amazing things that belly had done! (After more than fifteen years of hating my body.) You can get there! ❤

[@StudlyFudd13]

13:21 My family would be furious seeing this. "How dare she be so gross and disgusting. We shouldn't have to see that when we go outside! Wear something that respects you, you're just disrespecting yourself. She must really hate herself." Words from my family toward anyone being proud of themselves. I don't talk to them anymore for many many different reasons, but this is one of them.

[@kearstinnekenerson6676]

I think my body is awesome the way it is and focus more on how my body feels and functions instead of focusing on my shape when I feel like I am being hard on myself

[@SunnyCress]

Everyone still changes together in school, I’m lucky that my school has 1 small room with 3 cubicles that I can change in because there is no way I’m changing in a group (I don’t feel particuarly negative abt my body, its mostly because I don’t feel safe in the boys and am not a girl (and changing in the girls would kind of destroy my stealthness that ive spent years trying to build))

[@willowisaperson2807]

nearing 4 months in recovery for a restrictive ed that almost killed me and i needed this tysm

[@sydneymcdaniel3388]

As a trans woman who started very late (59 now 61) I struggle with body positivity and gender dysphoria and most trans KZbinrs are so beautiful and I feel like it's to late for me. But I do have a new Boyfriend who loves me as I am ❤️

[@cathleenc6943]

Thanks. I needed to see this today. I am an older woman and I teach horseback riding lessons. I myself am 5'9" tall and weigh about 50 lbs more than I would like to. When I started working at one of the barns where I teach I questioned the part in the faq of their website that said they have a 180 lb weight limit for riders, because they don't have horses that can carry that weight (even the most conservative literature says that an out of shape horse can carry 20-25% of their weight.) This is a possibly achievable weight for me if I really tried hard to lose weight. I questioned this because I don't agree with it unless they had a barn full of ponies, and because I don't own a horse and don't want to work somewhere that doesn't give me the opportunity to ride. I was told by the owner that they don't follow it unless someone is grossly too big as they do have horses that can carry larger adult sized people. I have a student that is in high school and probably outweighs me. I have a pot-stirring new-ish coworker who, when I was trying to decide what horse was available for this student to ride, suggested two very aged horses that I myself wouldn't get on, even after I told her that the rider was larger than me and I needed a bigger horse. It's possible she was trying to set me up but I have been working with horses 4x as long as she has and didn't listen. Today I got a text from the owner talking about the weight limit on the website, and basically bitching about this student. I called her on the phone and it got a bit heated and she never likes it when I have logical answers to her arguments, so she hung up on me. I sent her a text with and accidentally sent it to the group work chat. Then immediately sent a message saying that I hadn't intended to send it to the group. Low and behold, pot-stirring coworker responded, clueing me in that it was her argument, not the owner's, per se. So then once I responded to her with facts, and she lol'd a response, and I called her out for being unprofessional and body shaming, I sent one last message to both the group and the owner that I was not willing to call up a high school student and tell her that her one fun activity that she does will no longer be allowed after months of riding there, because she is too fat. That it was mean. I also had previously quoted the 20% study. After a bit, I got a message from the owner saying that she could keep riding there. So thanks.

[@RedJadeArt]

I was having a hard dysphoria day, I needed this

[@frogonwall]

I have two things to say about the second video, one more related to the video and the other to what you said about wanting older people to have body positivity too. When I look back on pictures of myself from even just 6 months ago that I hated at the time, I usually think "why did I hate these so much? I look cute". Because of this, I try not to delete photos in the moment when I think I hate them. I have no pictures that I took of myself from under the age of 17 (I'm 22 now) because I would just delete them immediately and it makes me sad that I can't look at the pictures I took of when I was a teen. I'm sure I would think I was cute then too, and it'd be nice to have those memories. I also dress pretty "out there" usually when I go out and sometimes older women will compliment me and say they wish they could dress like that or they wish they could dye their hair fun colors and it makes me sad. I always try to encourage them that they can too! I hope when I'm a lot older, I'll still be dressing pretty "out there", because that's what makes me happy. I wish more older women felt like they could do the same. They would ROCK the cool hair colors, crazy makeup, and fun clothes! Also about the hand heart thing, I think I'm considered gen z? (I've always been confused about this) But I do my hand hearts with my pointer and middle fingers simply because it looks more like a heart with my hands -- I used to try with my whole hands but it just looks like a blob instead of a heart when I do it because of the way my hands are shaped haha

[@carmelr5504]

I've always been self-conscious about my teeth, not only with yellowing but I also had a a lot of work done with braces as a fairly late teen, which I have since almost entirely reversed bc I forgot to wear my retainers too much (I'm an idiot, keep wearing retainers guys), but I'm still learning to not hate seeing my teeth even when smiling in pictures. It's been a challenge but I'm getting better at it 👌

[@literaltrashpigeon5570]

I turned 30 in 2022 and it's gonna be my best decade! I'm determined to be louder, more alt, and grow into the transman I wanted to be. Also, hella looking forward to 40+ hoping I can evolve into a silver fox.

[@Moth.187]

being trans and disabled means I have some pretty complicated feelings in relation to my body. i have lots of body hair - great for gender euphoria but horrible for sensory issues. my joints are very weak and unstable. the dysphoria from by chest and my hips and my face. I try to reclaim my body how it is, as it is now. and to change it in ways that bring me joy. i have piercings and I intend to get more, as soon as I'm old enough I will get tattoos, I dye my hair funky colours and give myself the hairstyles I want. I wear shorts with hairy legs, because I like wearing shorts. I'm working past the dysphoria I get from wearing skirts by changing the way I wear them to make ME more comfortable - because, despite the dysphoria, I like wearing skirts that's what body positivity is - doing things for yourself and not society :)

[@Bogdragenshule]

I turn 38 this year and I've started to love my body now thanks to my wish to teach my daughter to love her own body. I might have been smaller and more even before, but at 37 I know what my body has been through and how strong it is. Oh, it also helps to have a partner, who adores me for who I am.

[@thelizardthatkatyaburnt4743]

I wanna add that as a skinny person I'm insecure about my body, but I do not want to be thinner, that's what I'm insecure about! At this point I've accepted that I wont gain weight anytime in the near future. It's hard to always hear people say that there's no reason to be insecure because I'm "so thin". That's literally the problem, you're making it worse. Edit: Also the fact that this comment (even to me) looks like sarcasm is a problem. Also I recognize the fact that society will treat me better than people bigger than me, but that doesn't change my brain thinking they're much prettier than me.

[@PaniPunia]

There was a bit of a scandal couple of months ago In polish social media - a popular science focused creator, who generally sends a positive message (think "long walks and sunshine don't cure depression - go see a doctor, there's no shame In it, it's an illness and you need medical help") published a little graphic about obesity. He said that it's an illness, it can lead to serious health problems, taking care of yourself means taking care of your weight as well. And boi oh boi, did that explode. He was attacked for "body shaming", being sexist (there was nothing about sex or gender btw), it was everywhere and the whole drama created a mental link that equals body posityvity with obesity glorification. And it's all so, so wrong... What he said is true, but the way He tried to defend himself was not the most fortunate (possibly because the whole narrative was flipped at this point and he was trying to say that he doesn't hate fat people while maintaining his stance that obesity is not healthy), and I feel we went three steps back In that discussion In Polish social and traditional media.

[@jasminefeliciano2880]

About teeth being included in needing a self esteem boost, in my own experience I've always had insecurities around my teeth, mostly because they are crooked/crowded! Straight white teeth are the beauty standard in media, and in life especially in the US. It's also harmful bc here braces aren't insured unless extreme cases, so low income ppl have difficulty accessing them :( and then your teeth are teased anyway

[@jace.alexander.almalki]

I want to watch this all-day everyday forever 😭💕

[@VideoBeertje]

I also struggle to love my body, but mostly because I have a chronic condition that makes my legs swell and I need to wear pressure stockings... Bullies called me "grandma" and I felt really ugly. Luckily I now wear whatever I want, but I still catch myself thinking negatively about my body every day :(

[@jewelcurrie345]

There’s always two sides to every coin. I absolutely adore the loving positive vibes in this video :) I think my sister and I are pretty good examples of teenage body insecurity in different ways: We have two rather different body types, my sister (nearly 14) is really thin and has a tall looking body (she’s 5’4 but she looks way taller because of her proportions), and she is really insecure about being so thin. She really wants to gain some weight, and have more rounded features, such as her pointy elbows, shoulders, knees and pelvic bones. I think she looks like a supermodel, but she strongly disagrees. I (nearly 16f) am much more confident and I feel more empowered about my body. I have the opposite of my sister, I have a lot of jiggly bits (despite seeming quite petite and slender), I have rather large thighs, butt, hips, tummy and a double chin at times. But I also have a rather small chest, and I sometimes wish I could transfer some fat from my tummy to my boobs. I sometimes feel rather bad about my body, but I try to be happy about it and I love giggling about the way I can make my whole body jiggle and my curly hair bounce simultaneously. I find that if you try to make parts of your body that otherwise you wouldn’t love so much seem more fun, and highlight the parts you do love, you’ll feel much better about your body :)

[@JJamieGreyy]

I love Ezra so much 😭 his page makes me feel so much better 💞

[@anjalisebastian4676]

1st 3 min of the video 2 tiktoks in and I already feel beautiful. # feeling the love. Thanks Shaaba babe ❤🥲🥹

[@mysterypost5575]

I've been working toward body neutrality in my own life. It avoids the toxicity of both negative and positive body image and sticks to acknowledging and caring for your body with acceptance and understanding. Very much in the vein of what Emma Thompson was saying. Your body is your vessel. You shouldn't critique or feel ashamed of it but you don't have to hyper focus on loving it either.

[@juliahausmann7767]

I'm skinny but I always was self conscious about my hip dips there even was a time I thought that I was literally the only one with that now I'm becoming more and more confident with them as I saw more people with it and liking it

[@herothebard]

Shabba talking about body positivity well admiting that she struggles with body positivity made me think. There are people who will be like "well you are beautiful so you don't understand what it's like to be ugly." Or people who are like "your not fat so you can't understand what it is like to be fat." Which there are two things to consider. 1 is that just because you think someone is skinny or beautiful or whatever dosn’t mean that they feel that way about themselves. Like I am fat and when I say that I mean I am legitimately "overweight" (quotations because I don't really understand what "overweight" or "underweight"means since I have never heard anyone described as "at weight" or anything like that.) But just because I am fat doesn't mean someone half my weight couldn't also be called fat or that the constant media pressure of being skinny couldn't affect someone of any size, like that is legitimately how eating disorder happen. But also 2 there is something to be said about how fat people or "ugly" people perceive the world, like if you have a scar that covers half your face people might ask you about it and say mean things about you because of it, but having that scar dosn’t make someone ugly (or at least to me it dosn’t) yet they might precive someone asking (even in if that person is trying to be kind about it and not making fun of them) as that person bullying them, because of how society works and their trama or past or a lot of different reasons. 3. What I consider beautiful about a person isn't going to match what another people thinks is beautiful. Or what that person thinks about themselves. Like I can say I think Shabba is beautiful (which I do but for a lot more reasons then just her pink hair and pretty smile) but another person might look at shabba and be like "she's nothing to look twice at" or worse. But both of us have our opinions and they shouldn't matter (even if sometimes they hurt) because the only person's opinion that should matter is Shabba and whoever she wants to find her beautiful like Jamie. Edit: I'm really sorry if I spelled Shabbas name wrong my phone kept trying to autocorrect to Shabbot)

[@CookieFlavored4]

Shaaba, you are an absolute angel for this video. listening to you talk about this just warmed my heart so much, we love you and you’re the sweetest content creator ever 💞💞

[@Alexigalaxi23]

6:26 i follow her! spencer barbosa, shes so sweet and ball of sunshine, she makes a lot of body positive vids and its so sweet

[@kaylamadison4760]

such a beautiful message, thank you for helping me love on myself a little bit more today!❤

[@ithulah]

Thank you, I really needed to hear this. 😭

[@Elwene2fr]

Thank you so much for this video! I needed some positivity today and I'd love it if you make more videos like that. You're always sending positivity and good vibes, thank you so much for that. I just realized with the video about body dysmorphia that, if this video is real, I can put a name on how I've been feeling about my body for forever (I'm 25 and I've never felt ok in/with my body since I hit puberty at 11. I'm trying to do things about that: eat healthy, be somewhat active, etc. but nothing seems to be working and I'm starting to think that maybe it's no my body but my mind).

[@byecatsstacey7467]

💜💜💜Nothing but light and love.

[@shaaba]

lots of light and love too! x

[@unapologeticallylizzy]

I guess I needed this. I'm struggling to like my body at the moment as it just feels so weak and pathetic and it's causing me so much pain.

[@aggressivecatnamedtiny2462]

I love ezera so much they were the last video we need more people like you and them🥰 chef's 😘 💜

[@SLYKM]

I understand this, but so many of those insecure girls on the tiktoks (reasonably insecure bc they don't look professional model air brushes), but they were not unattractive by any means. On some level I can appreciate myself more, but on another I know I look worse than that so it's hard to say that I relate to them. But it's still a good message.

[@cecile436]

I struggle with acceptance of my body. Ok, my 2 burn out lead me to go from 55kg to 70kg, and then antidepressant added a good 30kg to that (at the hospital, not taking any meds, I didn't gain any weight. From the moment I started to take the meds, I started to put on weight.) I don't really feel home in that body any more. Now I just stopped the meds (slowly diminishing the dose for one year with my psychiatrist, so not something I just ditch without medical advice), and I hope my metabolism will get back to be a bit more effective. Also, even when I was 55kg for my size, I had a double chin, now so much heavier I don't know if it still qualifies as double or it is triple or quadruple. ^^ I need to work on accepting my body, but I also see how hard the weight gain is on my body (I get out of breath each time I do a little something, exhaustion comes much faster, I tolerate heat even less than before...) Anyway. Thanks for this video.

[@HermioneDisapprovesOfJKR]

I love the idea of jewelry as our fuzzy dice 😂😍

[@sharkarts378]

I saw wz in the thumbnail and immediately clicked the video, thanks shaaba you are so wholesome

[@TheHaniverse]

I've never really struggled with my body image in that I thought I was unattractive but my weight was something that always bothered me. Being black I have heavier bones (black people typically have higher bone density) and I used to be a US size 0 (UK size 4) but I weighted around 60KG and I always thought I was overweight because of it. My uncle is a personal trainer and he said I looked like I weighed 40kg so that just further deepened the idea that I weighted too much. Fast forward to me 4-5 years later, my post-covid weight is now 75-80KG and I'm about a UK size 10-12, I look back at those pictures and I literally can not figure out what I was so stressed about XD I looked incredible! I do still love my body now, but I do plan to start working out to lose weight moreso for my health and because I want to start dressing up again but none of my old clothes fit and I don't want to buy a whole new wardrobe XD

[@vivalentine]

I didn’t expect to see Ezra and Shaaba in the same place today but I love to see it ❤️

[@Roanmonster]

BMI is a useful measure, but 1) not without context and 2) mostly on population scale, not individual scale. So yeah.

[@Eco_Hiko]

I wish 13 Yr old me could've had this momma Shaaba energy in his life.

[@HermioneDisapprovesOfJKR]

Thank you so much for this! It means a lot to me, and to so many. Lots of love to all! 💜💜

[@lazymusician10]

I liked this video a lot, would love to see a part 2 of more body positivity. 💙

[@Vim_and_Vitriol]

Thank you for this video, Shaaba. It really made me feel like maybe my body isn't so bad. 💜

[@emmarose5911]

I hope that by now you’ve found stylelikeu! I thought of it when you mentioned wanting some older people featured in body positivity :)

[@lapislazarus8899]

The thing I've struggled with is that I'm a VERY tall cis woman. Ever since I was a young girl. And I'm not like a tall supermodel, I have broad shoulders, (had) large breasts, thick-waisted, narrow hips and no hiney. I have LOOONG skinny legs, long arms, short neck, and very round face and squinty eyes, I also don't really have a bridge on my nose. People can see in my facial features my Mongolian and Native American genes. I just happen to be blonde and blue. But the hardest is how I TOWER over everyone. When I was a kid I'd have meltdowns because of reading what other eight year olds weighed... I thought I was a freak of nature! Now I'm forty-five, and I miss how I was "hot" in my twenties. I've been severely injured and now have a below knee amputation. The hardest part is I don't have the strength in my core muscles, especially my lower back, to get around with my prosthesis for very long. I feel like if I were younger, this would be easier. But being really tall messes up your lower back anyways, now it's a million times worse. So I'm stuck in a wheelchair. That messes with your self-image big time.

[@clareborsari7114]

You are beautiful, right now, as you are. ❤❤❤