Bride Insists I'm Not Being Excluded From Her Wedding Because Of My Skin r/Relationships

[@bluexwings]

Coconut story: The fact that the church members called Michael OP's "true husband" and they're shunning her until she goes back to him sounds so cult-y.

[@meiimacca4054]

That's what getting tied up with church people will do to you.

[@shadowkissed2370]

I've been to a church just like that. The pastor's wife was shamed for wearing a full-coverage bathing suit in her backyard swimming pool, which had 7-foot-tall fencing all around. One of the deacons wanted to peek on her and then confessed to the pastor, her husband, that he had sexual urges towards her. She was called names and put down for it. There was also a member being abused by her husband, and instead of supporting her, the congregation blamed her, saying she needed to learn her place in their household and not act out. I had a second-trimester miscarriage I was hemorrhaging during and couldn't attend church one time because of it. My husband was told he needed to get me under control and not let me use excuses. They even said he should "drag" me into the church by my hair if necessary because it's his responsibility to keep me under control so my soul can go to heaven. We only stayed in that church because of my husband's family. It got worse when the old pastor retired and a new one came in with even worse ideas. We left just before the old pastor retired; we couldn't take the hypocrisy and abuse anymore.

[@xelectrix]

That and 3 services back to back?

[@ladythalia227]

@@xelectrixMormons usually have three sermons back to back. One for everyone. One seminary separated into gender and then a third. It’s been too long I don’t remember exactly.

[@franciebelcher4594]

Because it IS A CULT.

[@carlrood4457]

Now I think she chose the color fully knowing how it would appear on OP. She wanted an excuse to kick her out of the wedding that could be explained away.

[@Rose-yt5hi]

I feel sorriest for her parents. Imagine raising someone and they turned out that way. And unlike the OP, the ex-fiance, and the best friend (OP’s husband), it’s not as easy to cut off your own child. You just kind of live in perpetual disappointment that they’re that kind of person. lol.

[@DIEGOSHAY]

Do you think the OP is stupid?

[@Nyanx4]

@@DIEGOSHAY Do you think it reflects well on you that you can't sit through a single reddit story? Hell, there are even multiple speed options on YT. Pretty embarrassing lmao

[@gremlininblue2601]

@@Nyanx4 Not just that, but not sit through the story then proceed to go into multiple threads to antagonize people

[@JasperCatProductions]

I’m allergic to coconut, my husband reads all the ingredients on hair care bottles so I don’t get hurt. My hair falls out in chunks if I use coconut. This dude tried to kill you with cake! Run . All because you didn’t want a 3 some? Good grief.

[@melsehh]

My dad and my are allergic to peanuts and I do the exact same. I even refuse to have peanuts at all! It's not that hard to read the ingredients; I'm allergic to shellfish and my fiancé stays away from it. Accidents happen, but when it's out in the open like that? That's highly suspicious!

[@davidlionheart2438]

Coconut cake looks, smells, and tastes like NOTHING else BUT coconut. Why would someone who knows they're allergic to coconut eat it?

[@CRAZYPINKHAMST3R]

I have a coconut allergy too and my husband does the same. He also makes a point to ask if anything has coconut in it when we go to family gatherings or parties. Just to make sure. It is wild to me that somebody would "forget" an allergy of someone they love.

[@untitled-gv3qp]

​@@davidlionheart2438 She didn't realize her ex would try to kill her and she probably wasn't paying attention. If a parent, sibling or spouse you trusted handed you food would you check it for needles or sniff it to check for poison? Unless you're naturally paranoid your first thought after a small disagreement isn't going to be that the person wants to kill you, you'd see them getting you food and think that they were trying to do something nice for you to make up or something.

[@obscurityistheaim3685]

I have always wanted to ask this to someone who has a coconut allergy, does one have different reactions to raw and processed coconut? Processed coconut or cooked coconut causes me nausea, headache, stomach ache and some other symptoms while i am absolutely fine with raw coconut and coconut water. I have always said that i cant digest coconut well but some people call it a allergy, does that also happen with other people with coconut allergy?

[@P.H.R.O.G]

How disgusting to use religion to manipulate this woman into staying with the man who almost killed her

[@poohbear4515]

His whole family and church sounds very misogynistic. In their mind, why would anyone care about women when men are the dominant role in their lives and should forever be considered as “maids”, or “slaves”.

[@marshawargo7238]

When his dad said that OP needs to learn, compassion & respect for her "true husband & leaders" she should have said "Compassion & respect for people who try to or condone poisoning & murdering the people they profess to love? Yah, I'm not living that way, having to always watch my back, always wondering if I'll be alive or dead the next day due to my respect & compassion for psychopaths! AND this "church" & it's congregation are just a cult😢!!!" Addendum! "You Jim Jones/David Koresh wanna be!" 😮

[@ndawn90]

It's unfortunately extremely common in many religions. I was raised LDS (Mormon), and the number of women who were "encouraged" (read: bullied) into staying with abusive husbands by church leadership or blamed for their own abuse/SA is shocking. I include myself in that category. When I was 16, I was graped by my 21 year old neighbor. I went to my bishop for help, because I didn't know who else to talk to and I didn't know how my parents would react, and instead of calling the police and reporting statutory grape, he told me that I needed to go through the repentance process. I wasn't allowed to take the sacrament - which was something all the people in the ward noticed and gossiped about, so I got a reputation for being "loose" - and I had to meet with the bishop once a month where he grilled me for intimate details of my assault and read scriptures at me. I did that for a year, and when he decided that I was done repenting he told me, "I think you might be telling the truth when you say that this wasn't consensual, but I just wanted to make you go through the repentance process just in case you're lying to me." When I asked about what was going to happen to my neighbor, who was also in my ward, I was told to mind my own business.

[@CanyonALynn]

​@ndawn90 Your experiences and observations sound very similar to this ex-JW.

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

17:12 when OP tells the truth and calls him out on his projecting BS? And since when is a threesome a need? OP should take Michael up on breaking up.

[@alyzu4755]

Story 2: FFS, the gaslighting! 100% he hasn't told his father the true story. And, oh yeah, he's poisoned her multiple times. 😱 Efit: Even if the cake WAS an accident (which it absolutely was NOT), he still behaved like an entitled AH after she refused a threesome. All of his behavior is extremely alarming. Update: Holy cowbells! OP dodged a hail of bullets (pun intended). Her "true husband"?!?!? This guy is absolutely a sociopath. And his father may be one, as well. The fact that they lead a church is horrifying, yet not surprising. OP has been treated like cr@p by that entire community.

[@davidlionheart2438]

Coconut cake looks, smells, and tastes like NOTHING else BUT coconut. Why would someone who knows they're allergic to coconut eat it?

[@alyzu4755]

@@davidlionheart2438 It happens. Especially if someone is distracted. (It happened to my SIL a number of years ago. Luckily she's OK.)

[@CensorshipVictim]

I doubt the boyfriend's father is a Pastor, but more of a cult leader. I've never heard of a Pastor act like OP's boyfriend's dad or him. It sounds more like that weird "twin flame" cult that was going around a few years back.

[@podunk_woman]

In a few years OP will be back on Reddit in a thread about how she used to be in a relationship with someone who turned out to be a murderer

[@fleacythesheepgirl]

But Reddit is the bully and just as bad as her attempted murderer bf and we must treat our loved ones like he treats her🙄

[@robinronin]

S1: OP really came in immediately with the “The bride is not racist! She just... behaves like a racist.” 😭

[@pippo17173]

The wedding probably was the most obvious showing because I'm guessing before this, she never push her boundaries because of her skin color.

[@kateemma22]

She's not racist she just does racist things!

[@Nyanx4]

S1: That's racism. You don't have to be in a clan suit to be racist. Like... do people really think someone need to be burning crosses before you're allowed to call them what they are?

[@ndawn90]

Contrapoints made a great video where she talks about how bigotry isn't always the klan rally, tiki torches, dropping N-bombs variety. Bigotry isn't even necessarily hateful. More often than not, bigotry is more subtle and complicated than that. It's in her first JK Rowling video IIRC.

[@DIEGOSHAY]

So the OP, who is black and is the bride’s friend, is not qualified to say if the bride is racist, and must defer to you, stranger on KZbin?

[@pippo17173]

Op's ex friend seem to be able to hide it very well which is impressive. Really scary thought to think about a snake being that close to you.

[@Nyanx4]

@@DIEGOSHAY Gotta love people who comment without finishing the video. What, got too upset by the youtube comments and had to stop before the reveal, lol?

[@gaaraxnaru]

​@DIEGOSHAY Just because you are friends doesn't mean you know someone's true nature. I had a great friend back in the day, I'm black and he's white, now he's an out and proud racist. It baffles me to this day. We had so much in common and he was always so happy to see me, and this is how he thinks about my race? You think you truly know a person, but it all could be a lie.

[@karlat7880]

The father calling him her “true husband” is so creepy.

[@pris1378]

a conversation i had with my cousin about people being racist: cousin: i don't think anyone i interact with often is rac... wait... just realised my dad is terribly racist. me, thinking: you're 50 and just realising that *now*?!

[@xeldrine66]

TBF, your cousin probably had a bias towards his father because they're close. People tend to disregard the bad things close relative and friends do. I think it's a way to reasure oneself. "I'm a nice person, so the people I like are nice because if they weren't, it would mean that I'm bad." This conclusion isn't necessarily true, but it's something our brains do to protect our ego.

[@carlrood4457]

@@xeldrine66 We are all highly subjective in our observations. That's why eye witness testimony is pretty unreliable. Ten people observe the same events in ten different ways.

[@fallingawayfromthenorm]

Story 1 - It’s the brides own fault for not understanding basic color theory and how a color would look dark on lighter skin tones and light on darker skin tones. If she cared so much, she would have taken heed of OP’s warnings. She sounds like a bad friend and your typical bridezilla with zero ability to recognize her own mistakes. Post update: And she’s even worse than we thought but I can’t say I’m too surprised. I can’t believe she thought he’d want to be with her when she didn’t want the parents who loved and raised him to be in photos, and instead wanted his bio parents in them. I’m glad the bride got her rear end handed to her by her now-ex and her father. Groom dodged a bullet.

[@thomasjoseph5876]

The problem is her skin color BUT The Bride is NOT racist And my orange juice just exploded from my mouth and nose. Famous quotes in history ........... "I'm not racist, I have a black friend". Black friend: F**k that Racist B**tard. LOL

[@carlrood4457]

Oh, I think she knew color theory VERY WELL and picked the color so she'd have a reason to kick OP out without showing her racism.

[@fallingawayfromthenorm]

@@carlrood4457 I could see that.

[@pippo17173]

​@carlrood4457 ya before the update, no way this women not saw that during the planning. This is planned plain and simple.

[@untitled-gv3qp]

Makes sense. People with biases like that tend to be biased against a lot of things. Of course the racist is also against adopted family.

[@averycheesypotato]

I really hope OP in the last story seeks legal consequences for her ex’s actions. His behaviour was clearly escalating, she could have died that last time! He will absolutely repeat this pattern of behaviour with another (if he doesn’t take to stalking her). His family will cover up his misdeeds. The church community will cover for him. It’s dangerous

[@davidlionheart2438]

Coconut cake looks, smells, and tastes like NOTHING else BUT coconut. Why would someone who knows they're allergic to coconut eat it?

[@pippo17173]

@@davidlionheart2438 The women realize in the update that she was almost married to a cult. Bullet dodge and op should not bother trying to go back to the church at this point.

[@averycheesypotato]

@@davidlionheart2438 it may not have been made with much coconut- “contains coconut” rather than “coconut cake” per se. If you don’t eat coconut, the taste would be harder to place in small amounts anyway

[@dre1978]

I used to have a coconut allergy. I grew out of it but didn't know until a few months ago. When I was a kid I had a single allergic reaction and avoided coconut at all cost afterwards for over 10 years. To the point I forgot what coconut shavings looked like and accidentally ate something with them with my partner. The minute he realized I had a bite with coconut he was panicking. He asked if I had an epi, asked if I needed to go to hospital, and so many more questions while I just sat confused. I told him about my allergy early on and he made it a point to read labels for me, made sure to tell restaurant staff, the whole 9 yards. He tried to kill op on purpose. No other way to look at it. She should press charges

[@Endonia-ym3sl]

"The Bride is not racist in the slightest" proceeds to explain how the Bride is indeed, a racist.

[@thomasjoseph5876]

It's IMPOSSIBLE for the bride to be racist, she does, after all, have a Black friend. Bahahahahahahaha

[@shadowkissed2370]

You just know when someone starts with "they are the best," "they wouldn't hurt a fly," or "they don't have a racist bone in their body," it's about to turn into a tale of how they ended up in the hospital thanks to this 'angel' or how this 'amazing, non-racist' person gave them a good old beating while donning a white sheet.

[@thomasjoseph5876]

@@shadowkissed2370 You know it's time to pause the video and get your popcorn lol.

[@alexjesch-casanova6543]

The good old, "I'm not racist... But."

[@pippo17173]

@@shadowkissed2370 Its basically just a wake up call when people come to this reddit and ask if this is just normal behavior.

[@sersastark]

Most folls forget that racism exists on a spectrum and story1 was in fact was done based on racism.

[@ivorynk752]

Reminds me of Avenue Q "everyone's a little bit racist, sometiiiimes. Doesn't mean we go around committing hate criiiimes,"

[@ComaLies225]

I mean the bride was already being foolish for getting bridesmaids dresses in a PASTEL GREY. It’s going to look white under certain lighting anyway

[@nightmarefanatic1819]

Wedding party turned into a "Dodged A Bullet" Party I guess she took the line "It's a nice day for a white wedding" a little too literally.

[@Because-rt8qs]

"Her cousin is the color of printer paper." 😂 I'm also the color of printer paper and that tickled my funny bone! 😂

[@avaphynx]

Theres a level of racism in story 2. Jfc, also she was told she wasn't attractive by others. Theres a certain experience black women and other darker skin women experience. And being told youre not good enough due to your skin color. Is definitely apart of that experience..

[@kaykay8855]

You mean story 1

[@avaphynx]

@@kaykay8855 no I meant exactly what I typed. The op in story 2 is the only black person in her town and at her church. She said that's been her experience in dating and not being found desired. Story one never made those comments.

[@KE-hr4sb]

S1: You warned her. She played stupid games and won stupid prizes. Tell her you'll gladly not attend the wedding, your husband will gladly not attend the wedding, and this friendship is over. Seriously, screaming at you when she was warned (AND showed pictures)? Nah, fam. (And yes. She's racist.) My sister takes after my mother (Hispanic and Native American). I take after the Swedish side of the family. I borrowed what I thought was her pretty, medium-pink lipstick. It was fire-engine red on me (we were both wearing it at the same time). S2: Let me guess: he wants another woman, since "you're bi so why would it bother you"? Wow, that escalated quickly. He tried to kill you. File a police report and tell him you're already broken up. It's hugely telling that you get "sick" every time you have an argument. There was one post where a woman's husband was mixing slugs into her food, starting with her pet snail (and emptying her pills and filling them with salt)! She ended up having severe medical issues due to him literally poisoning her food! Please be safe. It's also not uncommon for "religious" people (even pastors) to have some really shady behaviors behind closed doors, sadly. My upbringing had some of this (basically raised in what I now realize was a cult), and look up the case of Micah Miller/watch some of her husband's "sermons." Warning: they make me sick to my stomach. Tell daddy dearest he's not your husband, or even your "true husband" because 1) you were never married and said vows before god, and 2) he was asking to sleep with another person already. (And bullet dodged!)

[@faeangel7649]

The fact that OP remembers feeling sick after several fights and subsequent times eating with BF is so scary. I'm glad OP is out of there

[@drimwalkr8923]

Y'know what, i was wrong. I thought this was a simple matter of people not understanding color theory. Border colors (like brown skin next to light clothes) will change how your eyes read the colors. But no, that bride is simply racist. Cut and dry.

[@SingingMermaid4]

Coconut story: Oooh she went to a cult-y church. Yeah.... glad she got out

[@shadowkissed2370]

Lol Daddy showed in detail where Jr got the punishing her for not doing what he wanted thing.

[@yamairad1]

Story 2. Whenever a parent calls because your partner is crying is enough to brake up. I'm not dating one of the parents. If they feel it's ok intervening it's over.

[@sapphicgeek24]

Story 1: Oh, sweetheart, that's a textbook case of racism.

[@meiimacca4054]

S2 jfc she needs some therapy if she put up with all pf that before the 3some request. Toss away relegion and pick up the phone to schedule a session.

[@lilunette9319]

She's so brainwashed that it is both sad and infuriating.

[@Davtwan]

Unintentional racism is still racism. Ignorance doesn’t make that untrue.

[@KH-tx6lg]

Any time a partner wants a 3 way, just say, "OK, I get to go first." I bet they change their mind real quick. 😅

[@imweakfordeaky]

Oh this douche thinks that his dream-threesome will be OP and Another Woman *both* trying desperately to worship his manly peen, not that OP is *actually Bi* and more likely to be The Desirable One. (…”Because women don’t ACTUALLY desire women… Women’s same-sex action only happens when there’s no manly peen around” according to these backwards porn-addicted pseudo-Christians)

[@25Erix]

Story 1: This could've been avoided if websites dedicated to this sort of thing had pictures of models of different shades so you can see how a color will look on anyone.

[@thomasjoseph5876]

They probably do but you have to look for pics of people with a comparable skin color in a different item of clothing but in that same color. Most clothing websites do that but it takes a bit of effort to find someone of the same skin color. I mean, you have to scroll down the page of thumbnails to find someone of a similar skin color/tone LOL.

[@carolroberts4614]

Op told her and sent her pictures! What else could she do?

[@thomasjoseph5876]

@@carolroberts4614 Maybe this was the bride's way of trying to eliminate the OP from the bridal party without showing the rest of the world how big of a racist she is? Or, she might just be an obstinate sort of person aka Bridezilla who doesn't take suggestions from others very well regarding her "Perfect Wedding Day".

[@Rose-yt5hi]

I mean, apparently the issue wasn’t the dress at all. If that wasn’t what set the bride off to kick OP out of the wedding party, she’d have manufactured some other drama to use as an excuse. She literally thought her fiancé’s adopted parents wouldn’t be in the photos because they’re black. Like. 😐

[@Viviolau]

No cause at the end of the story we learn it’s not the dress’s color that is the issue. It’s the OP’s color - bride is a racist.

[@PlasticBluVentRabbit]

“Well she’s not racist, but-“ Stop, you’re about to say somethin’ that makes her seem VERY racist

[@sdathomas5088]

This is why we need to get to get rid of the nonsense idea of "being racist = being a bad person." Everyone is racist because it's taught to us through socialization since birth. You, your parents, your friends, all the people you know are racist. Pretending that you can't be because it would make you a "bad person" is how we get situations like the in the first story.

[@avaphynx]

You mean bigoted or prejudice. Racism isn't just a individual issue, it's also a system. Ex, Jim Crow, Asian Exclusionary Act, redlining, the list goes on.

[@pippo17173]

I wouldn't be surprised that before this, she left lots of hints on her beliefs on what a true person is and it wasn't her acting horrible. People like this hide in plain sight because they know they will lose everything if they did.

[@YuToobVideos]

Story 1: I'm a black male, I dated a Filipina for a while. When her mother came to the U.S. her and I and one of our mutual friends picked her up from the airport (FYI, the mutual friend is a black woman). She introduced me as her friend's friend (the black woman) and not her boyfriend of 9 months. She said that her mother is not racist, and that "she would flip out if she date a black person", so don't worry about it because she's leaving in a week so no big deal. I broke up with her ( and her mom😂) and never spoke to her again.

[@BexsBoxofConfusion]

Wow that is horrible

[@ElaineFlores1982]

Actually, is not that uncommon at all… usually people from one ethnic group would rather date or marry someone from the same group. It almost always boils down to differences in culture, not so much the color of the skin. Like for instance, an African family in Uganda wouldn’t probably think to kindly of the idea of their daughter or son marrying a Mexican. Completely different cultures! But since the US has so many people from different cultures living in the same area, younger people are used to interacting with people from all walks of life, so it isn’t so culturally shocking for them. But the mother of your girlfriend was not used to it, so that’s probably why she freaked out! I don’t think it was because she didn’t want her daughter dating a black man, she didn’t want her daughter dating anyone else that wasn’t from Filipino heritage!

[@yamairad1]

You know, now I can't hear "sit back and relax" without hearing "chuck a prawn on the barbie".

[@ebbss4]

Why hasn’t OP gone to the police.

[@skyelindsey687]

They’re in a town where what the pastor says is law and she’s “less desirable” because she’s black. Even if she files a police report I doubt it will ever see the light of day, especially if the police are just as corrupt as the church.

[@francissobotka8725]

She's a Mormon and its a cult

[@nightmarefanatic1819]

For real, he tried to kill her. Which is a sin. I'd just go to another church and ask "How do you feel about women leaving men who try to murder her with her allergy?" Also I'd look up a list of LGBT affirming churches near where she lives so she doesn't have to worry about that.

[@ebbss4]

@@nightmarefanatic1819 huge part of the reason why I’m not religious and why I didn’t like going to church when I was younger. People use religion to control and manipulate people.

[@davidlionheart2438]

Why? Because the story is bullsh*t. Coconut cake looks, smells, and tastes like NOTHING else BUT coconut. Why would someone who knows they're allergic to coconut eat it? Didn't happen.

[@InvasionAnimation]

story 2 she really expected a pastor to be a good person lol. Especially one that raised such a psycho kid.

[@lilunette9319]

Seriously, they are red flags galore!

[@66DoodleGal]

The groom dodged a NUKE

[@katechiconi]

Story 2: the son regards her as 'the help'. She exists to please him, and if she'd married him, that would have lasted only as long as it took him to find a suitably submissive white girl. The fact that he feels entitled to punish her for being unwilling to compromise her morals just underscores this.

[@sidepai]

Coconut Story: Yeah. . . No. In my group of friends, a couple other people, and I have severe food allergies. Everyone within the group, whether they have allergies or not, is HIGHLY aware of ALL the food allergies and watch out for us when ordering take out when us 'three musketeers' aren't there until later for our weekly gaming hangouts. OPs ex is an absolute asshole. While OP was grazed by the bullet, I'm still so happy she was able to get away. Maybe get into therapy to work on her self-esteem issues, and to make sure she's in a better place mentally when ready for a new relationship so it (hopefully) doesn't happen again.

[@Dewdrop365]

I have a severe coconut allergy! I can't even be in the same room as it nor be around any of the derivatives (Polymers, co-polymers, etc). Whenever it's around me I swell up and get severe hives that last for days. It feels like everything is getting cut open and lit on fire, it's awful. I couldn't imagine someone doing this knowing how severe an allergy can be. This is 100% attempted murder. I hope OP presses charges. Screw that dude, I'm glad they broke up.

[@datmanydocris]

Story 2: "He said the wedding was stressing him out and he had a lot on his mind so he accidentally handed me the plate he meant for himself, not the one for me." That is a load of BS for numerous reasons. First off, if your partner is _that_ allergic to something, you shouldn't even be considering bringing it anywhere near them, so there's no reason he should have chosen coconut cream cake for himself. Secondly, I'm going to assume that the cakes looked different so there's very little chance that by the time he started eating the piece he had that he didn't notice that it looked different than the piece he gabbed for himself. Thirdly, he would have very clearly noticed that the cake he was eating wasn't coconut cream cake as soon as he took a bite. Fourthly, even if we cede those points and it actually was that he was so stressed that he didn't realize it was a bad idea to bring coconut near someone with a deathly coconut allergy and was somehow so dense he didn't notice the piece of cake he was eating looked different than the one he grabbed for himself and didn't taste like coconut cream cake, he leaned in to kiss OP immediately after eating a piece of cake that he thought was coconut cream cake, something that she is deathly allergic to. Fifthly, the fact that she has gotten sick numerous times after an argument with him is too many instances to be a series of coincidences, he is doing this on purpose.

[@warpthumr47]

To the OP with the psycho ex who kept poisoning her: the 1st red flag is that Michael is a PK. They are the worst people on the planet.

[@debbiehenderson7830]

Coconut story wow op had a very lucky escape is so many ways. Him being her “true husband “ is creepy AF.

[@mikef2811]

S2: OP, Run! It is crazy that her BF uses the BIBLE and Religion in an attempt to control her.

[@davidlionheart2438]

Coconut cake looks, smells, and tastes like NOTHING else BUT coconut. Why would someone who knows they're allergic to coconut eat it?

[@Nyanx4]

@@davidlionheart2438 **Probably because:** A) Not all coconut in a cake is visible. Sometimes it's used as a crunch layer or filling. It's not like all coconut cakes look like german chocolate. B) If other strongly smelling food is being served, coconut (which, you might be shocked to learn doesn't always smell like sunscreen) might be missed in the smell. I use fresh coconut a lot, and often it hardly has a smell unless it's cooked. C) Sometimes all it takes is one bite of an allergen to require you to go to the hospital. It's not as if she needed to eat the entire slice. Ask anyone with a severe peanut or shellfish allergy- both common where I'm from. D) Why would you expect someone you love to poison you? Obviously you trust them enough to get you food that won't kill you or you would have gotten it yourself. My turn to ask questions. Why would someone who seems to have functional eyes and fingers type something so stupid about triggering allergic reactions?

[@kateajurors8640]

Sorry OP saying everybody online's bleeding. Her for calling out all the red flags. She had just been skipping over when he is directly poisoning her after every argument and she's still debating after him. Using this manipulative tactic on whether or not she should be with him. Really shows she's gonna end up in another abusive relationship and fight for them. Because everybody else is just so mean.😂 All the while claiming everybody is being just as bad as her abusive acts😂😂

[@rosemarie1817]

The fact that Marky left the sweet laugh and misspoken words makes my heart very happy❤❤❤

[@LadyBern]

Story 2. I'm just gonna say it, she'd fall victim to a cult. I know Christianity can be one. But let's be honest that is basically what was going on, she got roped into a Christian cult and they were love bombing her with all of the togetherness and acceptance and sense of community. That shattered because the leader's spoiled little sociopath got greedy in a 1 year relationship. What really makes me think about the cult angle is how she reacted when people called her stupid for staying with him rather than dumping him that very night or before then. It's the getting defensive, people who are told that they are in a cult tend to get defensive and double down because they feel that they are too smart to fall into a cult. No, no one likes to be called stupid, but when you try to paint people as just as bad as the abuser you are categorizing them that way so that you can feel justified in ignoring them. Rather than letting a lightbulb go off that "hey my bf made me believe that I was doing something dumb, that I should be ashamed of my actions, and doubt myself so that I would stay. What was actually dumb was me staying."

[@neru1584]

Dude 2nd story OP literally was repeatedly made sick because her boyfriend was salty. What the fuck is his problem??

[@66DoodleGal]

She won’t do a threesome

[@davidlionheart2438]

Coconut cake looks, smells, and tastes like NOTHING else BUT coconut. Why would someone who knows they're allergic to coconut eat it?

[@starbird3939]

@@davidlionheart2438stop spamming the comments with victim blaming. Not every cake uses coconut flakes.

[@clwbchbabycakes]

Story 2: That's attempted murder. Call the cops on him.

[@SasoAkasuna]

You can tell his apology was fake and prepared before hand by someone else cause he said "my carelessness caused you harm" and two minutes later told her she was stupid for eating it??? So... Were you careless or was she stupid? Decide my dude decide!!

[@hotdog6523]

Story one gives me Tim Burton logic vibs😅

[@tartlynerdy]

Story 1 - NTA. I never trust people that start off with "it's nothing racist but-" and their story is absolutely about racism. The sad part is she's only going to hide it better instead of learning from this experience to be a better person. Story 2 - NTA. Op needs to stop being SO naive and grow a spine. This is a good reason to go scorched earth. You never mess with someone's food allergies. Micheal should be in jail right now. He's low key a psycho. End of story. This is way too much drama for a one year relationship and it wouldn't be acceptable even if they had dated for five plus years. Let's also not ignore the fact that Micheal was just looking for a guilt free excuse to cheat. Micheal is pathetic but who can blame him when he was raised by a disgusting man. There is a reckoning coming for both of them someday.

[@vfn2423]

Our couch king has returned!

[@carolroberts4614]

Don't mention The Couch!

[@ajeff7171]

He has! ❤

[@lillithherondale1972]

Michael 100% was trying to murd3r OP

[@LadyBern]

Another observation about story 2 Everyone telling the op to share the 3some request with his family don't realize that it's likely members of that church has done things like that or worse and it was overlooked because they "prayed on it and sought forgiveness from the Lord." The dad more than likely has a side piece somewhere. Remember it's all about the outward appearance. Don't believe me? A preacher/pastor actually admitted to his congregation about his acts of grooming and SAing a woman who had accused him. He pulled those same lines the bf did. His congregation cheered. The victim had to walk up on the stage and pull a Huey Freeman, 'wtf are you clapping for? He groomed me as a child, he took my virginity when I was 14, he continued to groom and take advantage of me until I got married in my 20s! This is not a man you should be applauding for statutory r@ping a minor who trusted him as a Spiritual leader.' Not exactly what she said but there's actually a video of it.

[@catsncrows]

Wildly chocking prawns!

[@chelseymathers2009]

I love Charlotte Dobre 😂

[@EternaMidnight]

"You guys calling me stupid for staying with him sound just as bad as him!" Does NOT help her case 😂

[@lilunette9319]

I've never wanted to slap someone awake across the internet before... omg, she needs a lot of help.

[@AngelaVEdwards]

Black women (and even some black men) have the most beautiful skin on the planet. I bet OP looked phenomenal in that dress. I wish she had shared a picture because I’ll bet she was breathtaking.

[@YuToobVideos]

Story 1: I must be a different human because I have never, or will ever fight to be friends with someone who disrespects me.

[@jumpmain]

The 2 story, it's nightmare fuel. So soo scary

[@janglesthearsonist5265]

I bet Backwards-Hat-Wearing Markee isnt even a real Ausie! He's just an American Markee putting on an accent!

[@BigRed1595044]

Story with the dress: I also thought dyeing it is a good idea. A few tips: make sure the dye is appropriate for the fabric type and make sure to use a lot of it. Top loader washing machine on delicate on hot is the best, fill it with water and then add the dye (liquid Rit) and mix it well. Don’t forget additives: salt for plants-based fabrics (linen, silk, bamboo rayon, viscose, etc) and vinegar for animal-based fabrics (wool, silk, fur even but I’m not sure it would work); look up ratios

[@lostshadows768]

First story: The bride might learn something, since it sounds like the bridesmaids, usually close friends a and family of the bride, were all horrified by her attitude. People who should be on "your side" telling you you're wrong, can be a wake up call for some people. Or maybe she'll be making posts about fake friends in the near future.

[@pippo17173]

Probably a result of having genes passed down by a racist in the family or in a environment she is in like college.

[@eph2vv89only1way]

The idea of adopted family not being real family pisses me off. My mom's birth mother died when she was 6 and my grandfather remarried when she was 9. Both grandmothers are my real grandmothers and my mom saw both as her real mothers. My dad was adopted. Both sets of parents are my real grandparents and his siblings from both families are my real aunts and uncles. My brother's widow is infertile and while my brother was alive they adopted a little boy. He is my real nephew every bit as much as my sister's kids are my real nieces and nephews. Adopted family is real family!!!!!

[@AngelaVEdwards]

Bride should have simply chuckled at herself because she didn’t listen to or didn’t believe what OP said about the color of the dress and then simply gone through with the wedding as planned. It’s not like people aren’t going to be able to figure out which one of them is the bride.

[@amypest1976]

Story 2: If I have said it once, I will say it again: religious belief is great (if it works for you) until humans take it over to warp one's faith.

[@AuroraPaintBrush4444]

Isnt this the entire point of wedding planning? Classic wedding planning is dress shopping. The bridesmaids, groomsmen try on the outfits and make sore they are harmonious. Like hair color. Red heads, blondes, Burnetts colored hair and even being bald. You plan around the bridesmaids and groomsmen.

[@misslauren6798]

I LOVE IT when reddit commentors open poster's eyes to abusive and narcissistic people! What started as a question about a threesome turned into an ENTIRE awakening!

[@jaymoon2377]

I'm not allergic to coconut, but I do have alpha gal syndrome (meat allergy, specific to pork) and my partner not only would never try to feed it to me without my knowledge, but he also rarely has it in the house. If it's in the house, he does all the handling, cooking, cleaning, and sanitizing. If we go out, he's asking the servers what's what and usually checking the menu's beforehand to make sure i'm safe and it's all okay. The thought of a spouse or partner not only willfully feeding you an allergen is disgusting and insane, him also being so blatant, antagonistic, and overall horrible makes it worse by tenfold

[@starbird3939]

Story 2 - NTA Oh god, OP is dating a unicorn hunter… and poisons her when she doesn’t agree with him. GET OUT.

[@Calalilyuf]

The thing is, his poisoning habit probably did not start with her and will not stop with her. She should’ve told others so that his next victim won’t fall through the cracks.

[@UnicornViking]

Story 2: The narcissist doesn't fall far from the tree.

[@justinburgard4700]

S2) OP needs to send the message she got from the pastor saying she's not welcome in church until she gets back with his son her "true husband" to his boss. Can't imagine the dioceses are cool with pastors excommunicating people for dumping their children....

[@yoyopron]

In OP's defense, people of color are so frequently falsely accused of "being too sensitive" and "making it all about race" that I can understand wanting to be careful who she called racist.

[@Zaddy-Lu]

That story by the last bi unicorn made me FURIOUS!

[@jess-bo98]

Backwards Hat Markee does hurt me! He keeps looking too damn good, hurts my eyes 😂❤

[@catte.]

This is so weird, I could have sworn I've heard the first story on TikTok but I feel like it was slightly different NTA though, it's the bride's fault and she could have easily paid someone to edit the pics afterwards.

[@taylorwashington7682]

Tik tok has a tendency to change details of a story to dramaticize it.

[@catte.]

​@@taylorwashington7682 yeah for sure, I just looked it up and it was a woman pretending to be the OP but I'm pretty sure it's not the real one because details don't match with the story. People are so weird for trying to impersonate others

[@loganjoh1]

Story 2: this is attempted murder

[@HonorWillow]

Giving someone something to make them ill or give them pain, allergen or not, is assault and if in a relationship abuse. She needs to report! (Obviously though it’s always up to OP as the victim)

[@kmaguire7161]

There are few things worse than a bride who has "the perfect vision for her wedding." Truly one of the lowest forms of life.

[@redthemc7194]

Story 1: "She'll have fun at the reception..." Does she not understand how weddings work? You have the ceremony then the reception a couple hours later at a different venue (most weddings)... Why would you pay a party you don't plan on attending

[@ariste01]

I have a sensitivity to onions, not an allergy, a sensitivity. I just get migraines if I have to much (or even smell them raw) My hubby is SO damned careful with my food. I can't buy it that he for stressed and handed her the wrong plate. Certainly he would have noticed when he wasn't eating what he got for him right?

[@QuayHollywood]

Story 2: Another petty potato has joined the Markee Army!!

[@boogitywoogity248]

Women and accountability, bf openly attempted to kill her, op: “why are you guys being mean to me? You’re just like my ex who I’m gonna go meet again.” Truly brainless.

[@johexxkitten]

Coconut allergy story... I didn't mean to give you the coconut cake, that was meant to be my plate... BULLSHIT! Who eats the thing their partner is allergic to, if there's a chance they will kiss later?? That was deliberate so he could head off with the guys, I bet he was off trying to score a more willing chicken.

[@DragonbornMike-ym2er]

Story 1: So, she was warned this was a bad idea. Expected OP to pay for this stupidity. Is taking it out on OP. Even if her hate is just coming from ignorance, that doesn't make it better. Accidentally being racist isn't a whole lot better. Update: Not at all surprised the groom called it off. And finding out that none of this was ignorance or accidental... yeah, no surprising.

[@zarahfrancisco3734]

Story 2: Honestly, OP should file a report against the ex. She might not get anything from it, but I feel sooner or later ex is gonna end up seriously hurting or ending someone in the future. If he has a record, it could help his future victims get justice.

[@StaubAufDenKnochen]

Your introduction made me smile thanks

[@SailorMoon998]

Damn that backwards hat look works SO GOOD on you

[@AvyFerg]

30:03 Dearest Markee, trust me-- she's ALWAYS "known" and it didn't start with him. Being the only XYZ woman in the area, esp if she's from Smalltown, USA, it's STILL a thing.

[@SilverRagaire]

Color theory back at it again with the “what color is this dress?”

[@nondisclosure3920]

"her skin is the colour of printer paper" 😂😂😂

[@autumnjey4683]

OP in that last story kinda pissed me off. "for all the people telling me how dumb i am for staying with an obviously abusive man, YOU are all actually just as bad as him" like what?? no honey you just don't have a spine.

[@suncricket]

Story 2: Oh no, the pastor 100% knew the whole story. Where does OP think the horrible behavior stems from? The father is just as sinful as the son.

[@katiecakesl4691]

The bride managed to mask her racism so well that when the mask slipped it fully broke and even her own family was on the groom's side. Makes me wonder what she said and thought behind closed doors and what lead her to become such a horrendous human being. I feel so bad for her parents, likely asking themselves where they went wrong.

[@rebeccak6682]

Wear that dress take tons of photos having fun in the dress, put them in photo book and send it to her as a wedding gift.

[@Because-rt8qs]

24:53 This is so bizarre because they're not married. Why won't the dad just accept the breakup? I know Jesus didn't want people to divorce, but they're not married. She has no obligation to date this boy.

[@nightdweller6446]

Bride nukes wedding and Groom dodges massive bullet all because of a dress..yup, op saved her bestie the trouble of a divorce due to previously hidden racism S2. Omd, today's winner of psycho r us is Micheal. That ended up being the nuke dodged

[@DominosAndHearts]

Loved the intro lol