Goth Fashion for Practical Adults and Babybats

[@timeladyshayde]

As a Goth with autism I have a number of sensory issues that make going "Full Goth" really uncomfortable. I can't wear lace for instance, it's like a cheese grater on my skin. Heavy makeup feels like poly filler. Toe-walking as a child gave me bunions so I can't wear pointy shoes or heels very often. My Goth uniform consists of black jeggings, floaty black jumpers and army boots, topped off with teal hair. If that's not Goth enough for other people then they can sod off!

[@NostalgiaChan]

I'll admit, the image thing was part of the reason I abstained from calling myself a goth for most of my young adult life, despite being interested in the subculture since I was a kid. Between living in a highly conservative area with no scene to speak of (someone screamed at me not too long ago out of their PT Cruiser just for wearing platform shoes once), not having the money for brand name gear and not having any DIY or sewing skills, I thought that I'd just come off as a poser if I claimed I was a goth with my dowdy-looking normie self. Not to mention the fact that as a short, chubby girl with bad skin that didn't much like having makeup on it, I certainly didn't fit that image of the ivory-skinned, raven-haired goth queen with impeccable winged eyeliner. It wasn't until I hit 25, stumbled on the concept of "corp goth" and followed a few eldergoth blogs with a firm belief in "screw subculture gatekeepers" that I started to overcome that extreme self-consciousness and allowed myself to partake more in the clothes I really wanted to wear, while at the same time letting myself not feel so bad that I'd rather wear simpler, more comfortable wear over dressing to the nines just to prove I'm really in. I also became more comfortable with the idea that I didn't need to wear black all the time just to show how goth I am. I like colors just as much as I like black, and as someone living with chronic depression, sometimes wearing all black can be killer on the mood. You have to mix it up sometimes. While money and living area are still dampers on the look I'd like to go for, I'm still taking baby steps to get there. End-of-year sales are your friend.

[@sophisticatedPJs]

If you're comfortable saying it, what area are you from? Sounds like where I'm from tbh (and also since this is an older comment, how's your luck been with incorporating goth fashion into your wardrobe?) I'm from NE Texas and it's really hard to find any hint of a scene here honestly so I totally get you.

[@jdb123ize]

Elder goth here. It was never about the clothes. For me it is definitely about the music, art, and literature. I never really got into dressing the role of a goth??? I will say this I am just as much goth as someone who does. Clothes are extremely superficial. It is the music that formed me and the attraction to darker things not who's wearing the newest expensive boots! Just a thought! 💀

[@kccrafts1]

I agree, im 29 and i dont have the ability to dress goth but i like to wear a lot of black and boots though. And i love dark lips or strange color lips. And im more obsessed with dark things and the feelings i get from being surrounded by dark things or listening to music that defines me...

[@witchinfected]

THANK YOU!

[@besmb-yo8qs]

I have a bit of problem with fast fashion, actually, but that has nothing to do with goth, rather, that fast fashion tends to be unethical. The industry takes advantage of people in Asia, plus, theres also the ethical question of animal welfare and climate change. Ive just started researching this, cause Ive bought goth clothes online from brands like Dreslilly, Wish, etc. The thing is: Goth clothes are hard to get in Norway, plus, the dresses are cheap and look nice. Yet, if you dont know wether the clothes you buy are made under safe conditions, what can we do? I dont want to buy a dress made through child labour or cruelty to animals. Yet, I still need to do more research, as Ive just started reading up on it, and wether boycotts can actually work or not.

[@alexismaddock3516]

This is extremely well said and more people need to hear this! I grew up in the 90's and it never was about being over the top and having the latest outfit because we shopped at goodwill and put things together ourselves because most of our parents weren't going to shell out the money for it. Nowadays I see so many videos of these people going all out with their makeup and clothing, which is fine but I work a full time job that requires a uniform and I have two kids growing up in a small town its just not practical for me to buy a $100plus outfit from killstar or whoever and then there is the issue of time getting ready. Anyway I'm glad someone is speaking up about this and shedding some much needed reality to the subject!

[@sarai72]

Alexis Tarleton exactly. Same here

[@breaking_candy7767]

I came across this video by looking up casual goth outfit ideas. I am 18 and I don’t have the money to buy all these expensive brands and I was starting to feel like less of a goth. I felt like there was this weird pressure to look a certain way. I am so glad I clicked on this video. You made all these points that just make so much sense to me. I felt like I was drowning in the social media expectations of what goth is. Thank you so much for saying these things, it really helped me a lot. I actually feel a weight lifted off my shoulders knowing that I am validated and that what I’m doing is good enough. This really helped out a lot and was a wake up call. Thanks so much 🖤🖤🖤🖤

[@MelindaGreen13]

Thank you, I really needed to hear this. I'd love to look a little more extreme than I do now, but I don't get out much. I'm autistic, so going out is basically braving loads of sensory input, tiring out from social contact, and then taking hours to recover from it. I'm not even talking clubbing here: I'm talking going out for a day of shopping with one good friend. I don't even WANT to know what full-on clubbing will do to me. No real goth clubs in my city to doll up for either, if aforementioned autism stuff wasn't bringing up extra hurdles to jump. My point with all this is: I'm sort of forced to be practical, as most of me leaving the house is going to work. Where I'm really restricted in what to wear: Dutch employers are WAY more restrictive than American ones. You can get complimented for skull earrings on a job interview over there, but there's no way you're landing that interview if you wear those here. That goes double for if you're young: ageism (discrimination based on age) is a big thing over here. A zebra with glasses on your shirt is already considered slight to medium levels of immature, I rest my case. xD My point is: there is an extremely slim chance that I'm going to look like Adora Batbrat (whose style I love, btw) or something similar on a daily basis. This also goes for weekends, as my job has been putting extreme amounts of pressure on me and my autism lately: I'm literally spending ALL my free time recovering from the intense stress reactions that I've been getting thanks to sensory overload, and nobody seems to beleve me on that... After telling me to hide it in the first place! Makeup and clothing are the LAST thing on my mind, as I'm also in social security at the moment, and I may be moving out soon. Big financial issues there, as there's little chance of making more than the lowest social security income in the near future. All of which brings even more stress into my life. I'm not landing myself in the hospital with a heart attack, because some asshole said I 'didn't look goth enough'. Because I'm already dealing with heart palpitations, sweating, shaky hands, etc. EVERY DAY. Thanks to everything that I have mentioned up until this point. Media and it's stereotypes can look at the darkly polished nail of my middle finger, then stick those stereotypes where the sun don't shine. After a good 12 years of supporting the subculture, I think I know what goth style is a little better than some reporter. I'm goth enough, and casual goth is a style.

[@elizabethlynch6544]

I am Aspie as well as darkly inclined. Even when i was younger

[@bananawitchcraft]

Same, I'm autistic and it's exhausting, some people say it's not a disability but I personally have to disagree

[@Accumortis]

This was an awesome video! Wearing what's practical for the day is always essential. Field study trips and labs in university, for example, are the times where I need to tone things down or dress a bit lighter. As for simple goth identifiers... Black nail polish has always been the easiest thing for me. No matter what, it doesn't tend to interfere or get into the way of things (unless there's a dress code situation), and it lasts quite a long time with minimal effort.

[@battleangelred]

I wear a very subdued and practical wardrobe at work but people still recognise me as goth. As someone who is now in my 40's and still active in the subculture, it pains me when I chat to people online who say they wish they could go to a club or event but they don't have anything to wear. I always say that most people wear black jeans and a band T. It's that simple. I also say that I don't walk around in a corset everyday. That is only for special events. It is sad that what younger people are seeing in the media and online is in fact alienating them from what is an inclusive subculture and most of the alienation is being done be people who aren't actually participating directly in the subculture. I think what you are saying is so valid and I am glad you have put it out there.

[@solvolva]

I love this so much. I have only just now stumbled onto your channel, but your words already resonate with me deeply. I DIY and thrift pretty much all of my things, unless I get something at a concert. I also don’t own any really elaborate goth outfits because I’m a single mom, and comfort is key in my wardrobe - though I’m always wearing all or mostly black and absolutely representing what it really means to be goth. It’s so important for us to express our fashion sense but also take into consideration where we are sourcing our pieces from and who we are truly benefiting (as far as being a consumer). Small businesses and local non profits need more support big time. Thank you for posting this!!

[@orangie9]

Olive Wolf Yes I'm on the same boat single mom that enjoys goth culture etc but enjoys comfort, but l love to dress up whenever I get the chance to go out, plus my family is not too keen on goth style because they don't understand it etc.

[@dazzlecookies]

I wish more people in the subculture//community felt the way you spoke. And spoke more about it outloud... “normal” goths kinda get hated on a lot! A lot of “oh no your not because....” situations And ew! What a bummer!! Loved how you brought all this up!! Maybe more conversation needs to be done like this!!! 💜

[@RoryPattonDreamerOfDunsidhe]

Another excellent, common sense video. I don't consider myself Goth, rather 'Alternative' and I self describe as 'Steampunk'. I find your videos address the issues of subcultures generally, not only the Goths. I particularly like your comments on everyday dress. Most of what I wear becomes very obviously Steampunk by the simple addition of Google's. However while being eccentric it is not socially offensive. I frequently receive comments on my dress, usually positive and your remarks about dress being a space for conversation really resonate. Eccentric, but not threatening or repellent, often does provide an opportunity to explain your subculture. I'll say no more, but there was so much in this I could go on and on, I agree with just about all of it, thanks.

[@hiroprotagonist525]

Good on ya mate! I think most older goths that have been around for a while have figured this out, but maybe the younger ones haven't yet understood this... so good video! I started out as everyone does, tentatively, and very much on a budget, and then I went on a walkabout of the subculture, and that got me to weird places... stylistically at least, and then came about the "average goth" look and following that were the first 10-12 years of being a step-dad which toned down my look a bit in a misbegotten attempt to make my son's life easier, but I couldn't forgo it entirely and even those small touches were enough to set me apart from the norm. Now that he's older and his mom and I are apart, I have been making a return to my old self for the past two years, and I've never felt better! All I'm saying is be you fer chrissake! Who gives a shit about what others think? s far as spooking the normies, I disagree (partially) wit you. One of the reasons we dress and look the way we do is because we need that armour to shield ourselves from the world that would hurt us, come on, you know this is true. We are not out there actively scaring people, but if we get a small amount of respect out of it, all the better. This is one subject I feel is often overlooked for what I can only assume are iterations of other points of views that are ultimately designed to get baby bats to behave in a decent fashion, which I have no problem with because not everyone has enough common sense to not go around behaving like some night creature out for blood (ya that WILL get your ass in trouble btw!). What I'm getting at is simply let's do away with this PC notion, and admit to ourselves, if nobody else, that we DO enjoy people being just a liiiitle bit scared of us; after all it weeds out the fakes and gathers the faithfuls, and it affords us a measure of safety which many of us have not known in our younger days, not to mention the old fuck you to the establishment (we ARE a derivative of punk after all...). Also, nice touch at the end mate!

[@DystopiaKaotika]

This. So much this. This is why I don't give two fucks about "looking über-goth" all the time, because fuck it - I'll wear whatever I want... even if that means baby pink fluffy sweaters with unicorns on them. Me looking like Hello Kitty on a crack bender on the daily doesn't take away much from my general interests and attitudes pertaining to 'goth' as such. I am - REALLY - a basic bitch in the sense that I favor skinny jeans, Docs and a t-shirt of some sort + a snazzy leather biker jacket. Sometimes the t-shirt might be pink, though. ;)

[@tjmario64]

Such an intelligent and thought provoking individual. Thank you for your wisdom, I love to heck the amount of Goth music I find, and subsequently looking to somehow dress the part, but understanding there is more to it than dressing the part. Moreover it's of being darkly inclined perhaps spiritually and internally which is expressed through multitude of ways and appreciating the musicality and culture of it. Thank you for your message.

[@1015SaturdayNight]

I have RA, so comfy goth is my life! Leggings and stompy boots forever. Cuddly clothes rather than restrictive ones are a must, heels are a thing of the past. That's OK!

[@laflaca6666]

Someone who has been in the subculture for 4 years, in the beginning I felt the pressured that I should dress like the people on social media. When I found Angela Benedict and you, I feel all the pressure go away. Most of the clothes I wear has last me for 4 years with some new ones do to growth but the ones that remains are the t-shirts because I get them a size extra and someone with a small that is a child size 3, it has been hard for me to find shoes that are my size and liking. I get stares from people when I go shopping with my mom and when I go through websites where it has my liking but they are either to big or too expensive. Now seeing this I feel better with the stuff I wear and my feet. Also I know a place to get brewed beer if you're interested. It's called Border X Brewing with two locations that is in San Diego and one in Bell California.

[@laynefangs]

After flitting through goth KZbin looking for the experience in hauls, lookbooks, and such, this is the video that really struck a nerve. You helped me identify some of my Internet-born insecurities and take pride in the authenticity of my all black workwear. Thanks, can't wait to check out your other videos

[@garymilligan9838]

Apparently all of goth dads shop at target lol, but seriously as much as I love my ruffle shirts and velvet frocks my wife and I also really dislike this modern ideal of you're only as goth as you look

[@akaaoife2312]

Ye, the look is a thing, but the music definitely goes first. If you listen to goth rock you can go in

[@DomesticatedGoth]

I wrote about this on my blog back in 2013, and back then, I linked to two other blogs that mentioned this (Jillian Venters' include) - and it's 5 years later, and it seems like it's now even more of a problem. I think the way visual content dominates online presentation is part of it - in some ways, this is a good thing for the aesthetic side of things, as it inspires people to keep pushing things, and 'improving' - to up their make-up skills and to do ever more creative, elaborate, beautiful and skilled looks, things that would make a theatrical costumier envious! However, I think the flip side of this is that it makes people think that this is how we all look ALL the time - and heck, I'm a 'every day is Halloween' type fancy Goth that has a wardrobe full of frills and even I sometimes dress down - especially if I'm miserable (I think there's a direct correlation between how happy I feel and how much motivation I have to put on my best and prettiest clothes, makeup, hair/wigs, etc.). Plus, there's digital editing - I don't look as good in real life as I do in modelling pics; modelling pics are usually quite edited, because they're trying to convey an aesthetic, not portray real life. I've written several tutorials on thrifting, DIY, and dressing practical, which I can message you (Cemetery Confessions) with on FB, if you're interested.

[@ostwestfalischehochmoorlei4705]

Some weeks ago we had a young carpenter apprentice, and an older carpenter, the old senior chef send us, for some work at home. At the older ones hair, you could see the 68th generation, and the young one had a fresh shaved undercut, longer bleached top hair and ear tunnels... normal carpenters, normal working cloth, normal work, but the hairs says all. Someone told me, that it was not easy to find work for this young man, not only couse of the look. But many carpenters, plumbers, electricians etc in our area searching for workers, and he gets a chance. I gave a compliment for the good job, for learning that business, and for the well groomed hairstyle.... thinking by myself that I should have shaved a week ago.... Life is not a goth movie, thats the truth... but sometimes its better. And its always nice, seeing an "alternative" person on his/her working place and with job typical working cloth.... ore more normal daily cloth. The details say enough, for those that are not totally blind.

[@megmcguigan3857]

I have finally gotten around to watching goth associated content on here and you are spot on when it comes to clothing and the realities of having a goth identity. I think more younger folk really need to hear this kind of talk.

[@jennifergroke]

What you're talking about here is so important. Not everyone is an Instagram model, nor are these "models" perfect. Because they're human, just like all of us. I also very much appreciate that you bring up the issue with class, security, career and other things that people can't have control over. On a slightly different note I feel I have to ask you - have you studied sociology? It really seems like it, in the way you talk about these things on a deeper lever. As a former sociology student myself, I really love that.

[@CemeteryConfessions]

Thank you! I have been reading the sociological literature around subcultures for the last 5-6 years as well as going through some general sociology studies on my own time to become familiar with the various frameworks and methodologies. Most of that has been around my podcast, but I've had an interest in how cultures work and what drives behavior for a long time and that's what drove me to sociology initially.

[@sablethornton6510]

Wow didn't expect to see someone so familiar here, I follow you on Instagram omg. This is kinda cool

[@jennifergroke]

Oh really? Hi there :D

[@karahb6573]

JenniferGroke i dont have instagram but i really like your channel! Id be super interested in some deathrock videos btw :3

[@jennifergroke]

Karah Blank Thanks a lot! And it's coming, I promise :)

[@aytakk]

Not just take risks but also remember that sometimes those risks won't pay off (or as you say look silly). We all have embarrassing moments where it didn't work. And thats fine. Gives you something to laugh about regarding yourself later.

[@ThereAsContrast]

I don’t think I’ll be able to accurately tell you how much I appreciate this video. I have always been.. for lack of a better term “darkly inclined”. But I grew up in a strict Christian environment and I have had my share of what I call culture hopping. I have tried punk, steampunk, dark hippie, Emo for a short embarrassing while, and for long periods of time just dressing more normie-like due to depression and lack of confidence. I’m 27 now and holy shit time is going fast and I just came out of a deep long bad time. I realised it’s time for me to shed my fears and embrace my goth side. I have always loved and partaken in the culture , music, art , books, and followed academia about goth culture. So yesterday I finally purged my closet of most of its non black things and I feel like a weight has lifted from my shoulders. I’m studying to be a preschool teacher (which in Sweden means 3 1/2 years of academic studies in early childhood education). And I’ve decided that I’m going to pursue my idea of writing a book on horror in children’s culture. My small town does seem to have stopped doing the few goth club nights that used to happen, but if my health will let me I’m pondering trying to start up a goth diy crafting/ sewing group and see if anyone shows up. So thanks again and I’ve started supporting you on patreon because you have done so much for helping me to return to the person I want to be ❤️.

[@CemeteryConfessions]

That is an amazing story, welcome home!

[@Qugoria]

I feel like I've been going through this my entire teenage life and even now as an adult, always trying to be more, more extreme and up until a year ago that really pressured me and made me uncomfterble and unsure about myself. 1 year ago I came to the realisation that it's not important. I started focusing more on the music, the gathering and overall society within the goth community and that if something has made me feel a lot more goth than those layers and layers of makeup. I still enjoy the extreme look and dressing up but in a current state of depression it's just not my priority, which sometimes makes me feel a bit less like myself but it's okay, I know I will come back to it and goth is always with me in other ways. As of now I just put on some cute tights and a comfy dress or tank top with a cardigan. Works just fine.

[@1015SaturdayNight]

Qugoria It's more fun for me when dressing up is a special occasion!

[@atr0phaneura726]

Omg Im so glad I found this channel. Even though I've never openly labeled myself as a goth I do feel a super strong resonance with all this. Jeez. I love what you say and also, your voice is amazing

[@cassandrax1512]

I don't usually comment on videos, but I wanted to thank you for making this. I hope more people find it and listen.

[@eternalwynter2254]

I absolutely love this video! I do not live in an area that would always be safe for me to dress up a ton. Some parts are safe but some towns near me you would get bullied pretty bad. I like to dress up when I travel to clubs or for some youtube videos. My teeth are crooked too haha I have little crooked vampire teeth and I dont look anything like I do in done up pics. Thank you for this vid! I think a lot of us can feel insecure when we see all the social media stuff. Also thank you so much for talking about supporting independent artists. I cant stress this enough :D you Sir are awesome!

[@hilarysell66]

@eternal wynter I myself am a goth with a disability (part time wheelchair user part time walking) and I can totally see what you are saying. But something that I am extremely grateful for is that I don't feel like I have ever been treated as I am any less (goth) for it. I have always been treated with respect. I unfortunately think that some of our extremism mentality that most of the population has acquired has unfortunately seeped into our subculture and times as well and it tends to create some of the elitism that we are seeing and it's really disheartening to me

[@aaronroberts6100]

Way to go man as a person living on disability its nearly impossible to buy some of the more expensive clothes out their I tend to just shop at Wal-Mart wearing jeans and a t-shirt I just buy them in black. And it works for me.

[@florentinogutierrez5461]

@Aaron Roberts I feel you man I limited on funds or no income at all glad I’m not only likes to go Wal Mart and get some jeans and Tees.

[@jaylivingstone8280]

Older Goth here. Thank you for many of the thoughts and words, keep up the great work

[@Jessinking]

i keep telling people target and macys are my go to everyday looks. they have constant sells, better sizing for people like me who are plus size and they have dress code approrpiate and casual options you can dress up and dress down

[@mandiduncan5437]

I also love that you made this video. I've always had a hard time finding affordable "goth" clothing that actually fits me. I am a larger plus-size lady with a good job that affords me the ability to buy nice things, with a dress code that isn't totally offensive toward alternative clothing, so long as it doesn't go completely off the rails; meaning I can dye my hair, or wear nifty shoes or jewelry and no one will bat an eye; yet I cannot find anything online that actually fits me. It's all catered to smaller-framed individuals.

[@MysteriousAsteria]

Lol, why does that video remind me of a certain user's whining on reddit, that "goff isn't EXTEME anymoar!!!". They even claimed that 80s goth were more overdressed and extreme than some of the costume clowns on the WGT catwalk corner. As you say, people make the huge mistake of looking at some of the most vividly and eccentrically dressed individuals, such as "alt models" and of course musicians (who often don some out there outfit for the purpose of stage performance) and then make the faulty conclusion that this is how "trve" goths should always dress, 24/7. I totally agree with you. It's more important to feel good in your skin and your clothes than dressing like some Lord of the Rings side character in an overpriced 500$ outfit every single day. I find that over the top outfits can come off as really costume-y and while it may be ok for an event I really don't think it works for every day wear. And I don't care if it decreases my non-existent goth cred points but I am still saying it: I find goths who sacrifice their ability to socialize and (for example) get a job, because they want to dress not just goth, but like a real life version of a hollywood character, a bit pathetic. Maybe I am a bit too conservative in that regards, but I don't get why it's so bad to tone it down a bit. One can easily find a nice job where you can be a goth and incorporate a bit of that into your job, but there are seriously people who feel they need to show their uber-gothness and demand people to accept them stepping into an office in a full blown costume. If you do not accept them as they are you are mean and discriminating or some shit. And sadly these uber-goths also take the fun out of it, because in my experience they are the kind of people who will rant and talk behind backs about people they deem "untrve". As you said, one should not have to be rich to be part of the subculture, but sadly some feel you have to become a slave to a brand and if you cannot afford them you are not kewl. That's some really gross shit. Killstar isn't even cheap, despite being produced the same way every other piece of clothing or even farbric you can get in regular stores. And good you mention that the little things can make a good outfit. I stopped buying ridiculously "edgy" items and instead focused more on the little things. A nice waist belt there, some cool earrings and of course the fitting shoes and you can look pretty good and authentic. No need for trousers with hundreds of rings, studs and other shit on it. Also it greatly limits the amount of money you have to spend on new things, because wth the right Accessoires, you can make so many different outfits, by simply switching what goes with what. 80s trad goths did it like that all the time, sice they were usually working class kids with no money. if one spends the time looking at some of the photos of your average, non-model goths/wavers of the 80s you'd see they had very simple outfits and what they really focused on were hair and make-up. Also I have to let it out, that I feel the goth corner on youtube really helped to give people the impression that you need to overdress. As mentioned here, many youtubers will goth the hell out of themselves before shooting a video. Just another thing that really annoys me (along with their sneaky hidden product placing and other shit)

[@laurenmorgana6429]

Totally agreeing with you@Asteria the movement is getting lost in a sell out market now, with all the alternative models showing more than enough on every platform.. money, clothes and how I look in my new hair color question ??? Or what should I were today I have so much to choose. What has become of us ? The existentialism question, and the Nietzsche aspect on life ?? I remember a time of rebellion finding your own tribe in the goth family. Yes, when you used to see someone dressed in black with that look, first thing was to approach them and have a conversation, later often clubbing together and exchanging telephone numbers. I used to dye my clothes black ..no money at 14 and my parents were not the one ready to buy me black clothings ;) sorry for my ranting and disturbing inadequate English ;) Love the Neon Judgement patch on your jacket and your channel.

[@antipatsy]

Thank you for this. I refer to myself as a retired but not repentant goth; I no longer have the time or energy for the scene as a whole, but my darker impulses still come through. I've always had to moderate my clothes for work, and never found it difficult.

[@TwilightKimvideos]

I’m so glad you made this video. I feel like so many fall into the trap of unrealistic expectations. There was a time in high-school, I felt quite depressed since we had to wear red, blue, white and khaki clothes. I felt very restricted since your style kind of spoke for you in high school. I’m lucky I have found a decent job where I can still dress as goth in a professional manner. But I definitely understand the struggle of no being able to outwardly express yourself and also feeling like you have to do in a spectacular way to be valid. Your message in this video really hits home!

[@laurenwiles2400]

Thank you for this video. I have been fighting with myself about my wardrobe and makeup. I'm a very casual dresser and I don't do extreme makeup. Since most goths on social media are dressed to the 9s, I have been debating on if I was even goth. I like the music and I have been drawn to darker things my whole life. I was feeling that since I didn't have a specific goth label or did a full look that I couldn't be one. Thank you for making my wardrobe choices feel valid enough.

[@sarahhostkoetter960]

I love watching/listening to your perspectives and research. It is very refreshing. I am a mother of two small kids, and I am in my 30's. The super-goth look is way too challenging for me and the crazies running around me all the time. I have to live, too. I can't focus on my appearance as much....but a more practical wardrobe, and less spikes! Anywhoo, I can't believe more people don't subscribe to you. You deserve more. You speak truth.

[@CemeteryConfessions]

I only have 1, I can't imagine having 2!

[@sarahhostkoetter960]

Yeah, we move a lot and I grew up an only child with a step brother I didn't get to be with constantly. It was lonely. I had my daughter for my son. They are best friends. It is so hard sometimes, but the love they hold for one another is incomprehensible.

[@KaiDecadence]

Honestly I find the toned down look much more appealing than something over the top. I guess maybe my sense in style changed in the last 10 years but I think the notion of an OTT look every single day is hilariously dumb because unless you can afford to live a certain way with not much commitments, it's not practical.

[@sarahhostkoetter960]

Kai Decadence totally. I mean I am still a person with a life. I got shit to do...

[@KaiDecadence]

Exactly. And it's still possible to show your love to the Gothic side in a comfortable look and I just like seeing what people can do with a simpler and practical look. Like for example, there was this blog called Sophistique Noir and the woman who ran it was just awesome. She was showing ways on how to make nicely dark but simplistic outfits for work and the weekend as well as creating a Gothic style that worked for her age as she was in her 40s.

[@doctornobody611]

when i go to events in the city, i dress up in the clothes in my profile picture. but every other day i just wear black or spider web leggings ect.

[@wendygreene]

I'm a Metalhead/Goth so I have the advantage of just tossing on a black band T-shirt and black leggings and calling it a day. I have to wear scrubs to work so I try to wear as many black scrubs as I can.

[@ep2848]

I've watched quite some videos like this about fashion and tips for baby bats etc ,because well.. I'm a newbie and im still doing research and stuff but this is the best video I've seen 👏🖤 it's very rational and even comforting somehow and it also has some advice that can apply to many other people besides goths this video deserves much more attention than the ones those popular channels made

[@FrankenFunder]

Amen to that. My day to day clothes outside of work are black jeggins (too fat for skinny jeans) from matalan and some type of black band tee or a sweater from h&m, black trainers or the couple pairs of goth boots I have. I don't own any pikes but I have a pair that look almost like pikes that I got on sale in river island for like £40. As you say it's the little things that give it away. The layers of silver occult necklaces and black beaded necklaces. The big dangly ankh earrings. The black skull beaded bracelets and haematite bracelets I layer up and the one silver bat ring that I have. On a normal day off for make up these days I tend to just slap on some liquid lipstick and perfume and call it a day. I only do a full face of extreme make up and stick my hair up like siouxsie when I'm going out to a goth event of some kind. Same with my more extravagant clothing. Those are generally reserved for club nights and gigs

[@peaksyrov]

I work construction so five days out of the week I wear fluorescent shirts and blue jeans hahaha , also I’m going bald so I don’t have the luxury of cool hair . But for me I’ve always been I’d say casually goth , I don’t think I’ve ever like tried to be goth , I like the music and I get a lot of inspiration from the music I listen to, I think I’m just creative and unique and I like what I think is cool , I like to express my individuality and I wear what I have , most my black tees are tattered from working in the sun and they look like shit , I wear black skinnies , I wear pikes I got from Etsy , a shitty black tee and one of my jackets I think is cool .

[@peaksyrov]

Always practical

[@MaleTears]

thanks for having talked about this

[@enshrouded3044]

Great video. This will save a lot of people a lot of stress and money. I had an epic fail once trying more extreme face paint and ended up more Fester Addams than Goth. I expected a total slagging but people just walked past and said "Goth" That made my day!

[@willowwoodmanor9404]

I appreciate what you have to say in this video, I agree that as a newer member to the goth culture it is entirely too easy to slide into the imagery that is fed to the masses via you tube and other media. Thank you and I enjoy your podcasts as well.

[@miriamreinhardt8939]

This is one of the reasons why I incorporate asceticism into my personal interpretation of Goth culture

[@kristiewommack2635]

Speak truth! I have been darkly inclined for a long time and the influx of the Internet Goth Gods has been so strange to see. Like...who died and made Killstar the End-All? It must be so frustrating for kids to see all that and think that's reqired everyday reality. The pic of "Goth does Target" is everything. Keep up the good work!

[@WyldwychsRamblings]

Thanks for sharing. I agree with you.. the whole media stereotypes have a lot to answer for, imho. People can be whoever they want to be in the internet... Lets revive the local cultures of goth. Most major cities have some gothic subculture, local to me, there isn't a lot, there are a lot of goths around, however, a number of them are divorced from each other, sadly. I live in a city, however, its not one of the major cities in the UK, however we have to go to the larger cities if we want specific events. However, I have to say, its enormously tempting to start something up... same with a more 'alternative' market... where creatives can share their wares... rather than the usual 'craft' fairs. hmm... leave it with me... I have a few ideas. :-)

[@Davrainbow]

Wyldwych's Ramblings If I lived in the UK I would join forces with you haha. Sadly located in Florida there isn't much of a goth scene that I know of. For obvious reasons hahaha. Too much sunshine...

[@VaruniaKhan]

This, 100%, love it. Glad you got around to making this video!! Definitely a subject that needed to be cleared up for some.

[@kodibyrd7092]

I tend to ignore the stereotypes but still get asked them a lot to see if they are true. Wearing black makes me happy. I do get asked if I wear my elbow length fingerless gloves to hide scars and I just walk away from that conversation. The answer is I don't have any scars on my arms from self harm. I wear black nail polish because I like it and it keeps me from chewing on my nails. I wear black eye shadows and black eyeliner to school (art school) and people complement me or they tell me "you cant wear that makeup when your applying for jobs in your field. First impressions matter" and I just tell them I know. I dyed my hair because I was unhappy with my original hair color so I dyed it black. I keep getting this stuff every day. Even when I come to school in a black dress and my jewelry gets questioned. I mainly wear baggy shirts and jeans and black boots with a baggy black hoodie. I wear a collar for the fashion and to help with my anxiety because it has a buckle along with my bracelets. Why cant people just see that I am trying to be happy with myself and my own fashion and life choices without trying to make me frustrated and upset? Sorry Im not going to change because society doesnt accept it

[@reudemort368]

Thank you for these I'm glad there is someone with balanced perspective out there 😁 very important points made, being able to allow yourself the confidence to experiment is the important part for me even though I'm now getting on a bit I still allow myself to have fun with it and mix it up.

[@phantomaniperv]

That comment around 15:00 - Ehm you realise you're cute af right?

[@jeanproctor3663]

Just what I was thinking too! :)

[@crowntheraven1372]

Gothic Subculture = Creative Individuality Ty for the encouragement😇🦋💀 It’s kinda in the middle for being mom, over the age of 20 & having a mohawk. I love the word goth, it’s a very tasty word that says “variety ”. To be honest I grew up in a strict household. Expressing yourself through clothing, makeup, band music or hair, hell no. My parents believed it was more important how the world sees you...not how you see yourself. I developed PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), anxiety (“how do you think other people see you” my mother’s favorite saying...I’m still rolling my eyes at that when I hear that every now & then when visiting them) and depression from the lack of being able physically expressing myself. I am proud to say I am the very opposite of them 😊 self expression is welcomed & my youngest is very expressive as is my oldest. I do agree with everything you had gone over in this video. Again, I thank you for encouraging those who are either new or have been a part of the gothic subculture for along time. Ty

[@uggie]

This is very well explained! I have recently been introduced into the subculture for about three years. It is great that members of the culture are devoting their time to help newcomers like me into the right direction. I really appreciate this video. Thank you for sharing!

[@lilylocket767]

When ever I click on a video from you I always know its going to be worth it.

[@Sanniz]

Loved your way explaining you can be goth even when you're not an Instagram model. I am elder and now gonna be 50. Not as extreme as I was when I was younger and most of the scene where I live is gone. Not really seen any youngsters directly either. Must confess I bought some Killstar, but also bought from friends that design own things. Or I try some diy too. My look is many times more comfy and everyday look. Black usually. Health issues and work stopped the more extreme part of me. But I hope in the future be able start again sew my own stuff. I am plussize and taller than many clothes are even from smaller brands. And shoulders and boobs too big to fit, so I buy the things I think can flatter my goth ego. Only missing wearing necklaces. Haven't been able do that for years cause my health. At least I have my ankh ring and my earrings. And for mention something else... You got a lucky woman by your side. You are a beautiful goth and for me more goth than some more extreme ones. Wish more could be like you when it comes to the thoughts about the subculture. Thanks for an excellent video!

[@CarolineCarnivorous]

Fantastic video! The only time I couldn't express myself in my looks was when I moved to the USA to work for Disney World for a while - but it didn't really bother me that much. As long as one isn't discriminated against because of being alternative, I think it's completely fine and fair to dress a certain way for work. It's work, for fucks sake. Most of the time I give zero fucks about how I look, I don't even care that I have eyebrow stubble (or worse, they grow completely out). I only put effort into my look when I go out. Maximum effort during WGT obviously, since it's my vacation and I get to wear those ridiculous things that are incredibly impractical in everyday life. And yes, it's completely true that the majority of the WGT attendants are dressed in t-shirts and shorts (it's summer, no wonder)! It's such a shame that kids think that what they see from these festivals (and on youtube in general) is what a goth looks like every day. That's one of the main reasons I started blogging, to do OOTD's no matter how fucking boring I looked, just to show them the reality. This stuff has gotten so bad that when a new kids comes to Gothic Amino and asks questions, we by default say that the look doesn't matter at all, just so they can realize it's a music based culture.

[@darkbaphomette]

I really enjoy watching your videos! I’ve never been very wealthy and this in a way makes me feel better. I see all of these people in these expensive clothes and shoes and I’m over here maybe having two or three nice outfits (what’s funny is I found them in secondhand shops) and the rest of my wardrobe is rather casual. As much as I’d like to dress nice and fancy all the time, I can’t really afford it and it honestly bothers me a bit sometimes. I don’t know why but it does. I’m rambling but my point is that I enjoy your views and your insight on these subjects!

[@jesterspookshow548]

I love this video. It’s a really good message also I shop at dark angel and get nothing but complements on the clothing from that shop

[@Nigredo1974]

Thank you for this video. 🦇 I do agree with you mostly, accept the part on clothing. I do believe in supporting artists 100%. But if I see something I can't live without I will get it.

[@jasminebarnette3125]

I often find myself falling into "you're only as goth as you look" trap and it makes me feel kinda crappy because I feel like I'm not "pretty enough", it makes me so relieved to hear videos like these, I also like Angela Benedict's videos about this.

[@cassandra2968]

I love wearing black, but I also love wearing other colors. My style depends on my mood. But I love goth music, the subculture in general, movies, art and the literature. I don’t really dress the part. Sometimes I wear all black and sometimes I don’t. I thought the culture was more about the interest in the music and literature than the type or color of clothing you wear.

[@pathogenoxide6917]

Definitely agree on the more practical side of goth style, gods knows being a former metalhead really helps on that aspect. It's a sad thing that quite a few folks worry more about the looks instead of the music, but I think that's a rather common problem, hell the metal scene was devolving to that and how loud you could scream while doing blastbeats by the time I moved out. But really alot of people need to realize, Black is damn hot in the southern summer, make-up runs, hair falls out, and looks aren't everything.

[@skellymom]

3:48 Kind of reminds me of Cosplay Conventions. There can be some really simple and amazing creativity and presentation. However, the more involved looks (and, usually the more expensive and time consuming) will get the most photography and circulation. Physical imagery plays a huge role in our society. The Con fandoms, geek/nerd/movie/gaming/animae/graphic novel movement has also been repackaged into commodity...just like Goth and other subcultures have.

We need more people like you in the world! Great video.

[@OpalWilde]

I thoroughly enjoyed watching your video, some really valid points here. Very refreshing, thanks for making it! x

[@dimitriusconstantine5732]

thank you for shedding some light on a very important subject! im subbed!

[@jeanproctor3663]

I'm glad you mentioned Dark Angel clothing. Their stuff is beautiful and washes and wears wonderfully (as does Laughing Vampire). I have a few garments from both companies. Fab video and spot on with everything you're saying. Thank you.

[@metalmyke1]

Will black sweatpants or some kind of black "pants" be ok? I do not have money to buy black jeans.

[@agresticumbra]

Do you have thrift stores nearby? It's amazing sometimes what two to three bucks can get ya.

[@nastassiamorrison4699]

Yes friend. It is

[@absolutlyunsure]

"...not an alien...sex fiend." Lol Very well put. Thank you for continuing your wonderful videos and helping many who don't or can't see the bigger image. You give a feeling of... More breathing room. I also really enjoy your discussions when you get the chance to have guests. Please don't stop.

[@Nambazi]

Great Video. I do alot of lagenlook and billowy fabrics, and its tough to wear the flowy fabrics without kids just grabbing on to it. An important topic about allowing ones lifestyle to grow with the person. Not a phase.

[@bluBlaq33]

Nordstrom in California let’s you dye ur hair any color so long as it’s soft or pastel in tone. I felt much freer, dressing up for work, working there.

[@cacaubmad]

As always, FANTASTIC video.

[@cacaubmad]

(btw, I really need to make summaries of your videos to my brazilian friends soon. Hopefully on my holidays! We recently discussed big brands and consumption habits in the subculture in our citie's local zine and it resonates with a lot of what you said.)

[@AyaSnake1]

Thank you for this video. It was very informative and you were telling exactly same thoughts as what I have about this and one other style.

[@yugiohmasterchannel101]

think you. you helped me. think you so much. .

[@witchothewood455]

Thank you, thank you! I love super extreme goth fashion, but I just can't wear that kind of thing to work and being as how I live in Texas, it's way too hot most of the year to wear some of that stuff.

[@foresttrees3128]

We're not all beauty gurus and make our money off of the fashion. We're people that like expressing the beauty of darkness through our dress, music, and lifestyle. Some of us just wear black tshirts and sweatpants everyday. People need to understand that.

[@razvandobos9759]

It depends on what job or situation your in that you can dress in the more extreme Goth attire.

[@davidhumphreys1422]

I love this channel! Great content, very assuring. Subbed

[@LasEnchiladas]

I try to dress the part if laundry and money allow :) But sometimes just a pair of black yoga pants and a band shirt is all that I have until laundry is done again! :) Where were you 7 years ago when I was finally letting my true self be revealed! Thanks again! Becoming a huge fan! 🖤🖤🖤🖤

[@theYguy300]

I feel like I'm a closet goth. My views on life, my favorite colors... me looking at certain styles that I dream of wearing but never going through does have me feeling a bit uncomfortable. I've finally decided to take this year to begin experimenting various possible looks. Hoping I can find my own unique identity.

[@pythosdegothos6181]

I do think though, work should NOT have as many restrictions on self expression as it does. However your points are very good ones, especially the comfort issue. There are other social restrictions when it comes to styles and that being one's sex or gender identity. I prefer leggings or skirts, and wear them with boots, and various tops. I also like to have my nails black, and have silver jewelry. However I am also male, and THAT alone makes it not only am I socially limited in what I can wear, but also many other things. This is also a reality. (I hate skinny jeans, and jeans and slacks in general annoy me, always have.) I do try to break boundaries however and present as positive an image as possible, in as practical a view on the goth look. I try to challenge social norms and especially gender expression norms. You hit on this in the trailing part of this very good video.

[@nevermore3928]

We didn't have quite the access to what is there today. Eyeliner, took a very long time to apply for instance, it was waxy as fuck and we had to literally light that shit on fire to get it hot enough to apply as much as we wanted. It didn't always go on dark either. We didn't have the internet to buy clothes, or have access to band shirts, we had to go see the band to get a shirt. We just frankly didn't have quite the access. We also didn't see what "others" were doing unless we met up with them face to face so extremities became gradual over time as we saw others do it in person and were influenced in that manner.

[@ShadowCaster575]

Thank you so much for making this video!!! Someone needed to say this.

[@virtuevelour5106]

This was fantastic :) Thank you for putting this out there

[@mangoandrice]

Did you say you have a blog? I'd love to follow

[@CemeteryConfessions]

thebelfry.rip :)

[@darklausal23]

Adjusting is important to me, I don't like narrow/pointy/ heeled shoes, so I have all black lace up vans with spikes (DIY) and I buy Harley Davidson buckle boots instead of clunky/tall boots or rounded tip dress shoes.

[@razvandobos9759]

That thumbnail is cute!

[@freeandunexplained3011]

I'm been very fortunate and, despite growing up in a roman catholic, creationist household, my family has been very supportive. At first, no. But through a gradual progression of my wardrobe getting darker and darker, they have lowered their defenses. I'm in college at the moment and I'm also lucky enough to be to dress how I want. I also live by a thrift shop and get the majority of my clothes from there and am constantly working on fun diy projects. So, I'd say I'm doing well at the moment.

[@darkchurchhill]

I do occasionally buy from largish goth retailers like killstar and disturbia because I have the money and like some of their items as they are more toned down then the super eccentric things I find with handmade sellers. However I was always under the impression that their owners were in the goth scene so I had no issues with it, but I guess I should do better research.

[@andi80s]

thanks, daniel. this is great x

[@autumnakins7640]

Omg I love your voice...

[@middleofnowhere1313]

There are the modifications we have to make as the years pass. No matter if you take good care of yourself, that black lipstick is probably not gonna be as fabulous at 50 as it was at 15. I have lamented the necessary changes to my wardrobe, but I have to be realistic.

[@rickonnye2001]

Great video watched it several times 😀😀😀

[@besmb-yo8qs]

I bought two dresses from Dreslilly, and I started thinking about this after I bought them. Any thoughts?

[@jetsetwm]

Yes I agree. Like your supposed to spend a huge amount of money lol to fit in ... Have a strict look. It matters but the music matters more.

[@cryptsandcatacombs3097]

❤❤❤Thank you so much daniel.

[@florentinogutierrez5461]

I was looking forward to see you and your child shopping at Target 🎯 for DIY outfits there’s hardly DIY tutorials for Goth Men outfits this why I go Adrogynous style inspired by Glam Rock, Punk Rock , Industrial and Rozz Williams.

[@thecageofinsanity.6968]

I had this person in my freshman year that would pull on my cloths when I would wear goth things that dangled I hated it so much I kept telling them to stop but they wouldn't I stopped wearing some of my favorite jewelry then they started telling me I was not goth enough. I was so angrey lucky for me they graduated that year, I kinda have exploded this year, I haven't had much backlash this year except my mother once told me I looked like Halloween when I wore black lipstick and contouring one day and told me to go take it off. I love expermenting.

[@Drakanx]

you talk everything there i should have listening when i was a "baby bat"