Checking In - Seasonal Depression

Hi friends -
I'd like to apologize, dear friends, for the inconsistent uploads/livestreams. I've had a touch of the seasonal blues, but will definitely be back this Saturday at 4pm (est) to do a live.
Thanks for your continued support and patience, friends. Much love.
Jason

[@Herofixtv]

Thanks for checking in bro , I know the feelings about the depression , please feel better bro .

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you so much, Leonard. I appreciate your caring and your support more than I can express. Your a great man, and I have all the respect in the world for you. Thank you for being a friend. ✌😊

[@CMoore8539]

You look Gorgeous!!! We Love You, Jason. Stay Strong and we’ll look forward to seeing you on Saturday!!!♥️

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you so much, Cindy. Much love to you, too! Talk to you Saturday, friend. 💙

[@courtneyremarks1133]

Hey Jason I FN love your hat!!! Owls are my absolute favorite!! 🦉🦉🦉

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks so much, sweetheart! I love owls, too. (Owl has been my nickname since I was 17.) ☺💜☺

[@christychason78]

Hi friend! I feel you on all of this. Take all the time you need. Love you 💛

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks for understanding, sweetheart. I'll definitely get back into the swing of things. I hope you're doing well, dear friend. Thank you for your friendship and your caring and support. You mean the world to me, and I'm proud of you always. Much love, Christy! Talk soon. 💛💙💛

[@jaimereynolds258]

Always nice to see your face, Friend

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hiya sweetpea! Miss your face. Much love to you, I'll be in touch soon. I'll drop you an email this week, so we can catch up. Thanks for your continued care and support, your patience, and your increadable friendship. I'm a lucky man. 💛💙💛

[@honor2798]

So great seeing a video from you Jason, ❤️

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you, dear Honor. From the beginning, you've shown me nothing but care and support and encouragement. I can't even express fully how much that means, and how deeply you're all appreciated. Much love and respect, friend. ✌😊💛

[@Blondie727]

Hey Jason! 👋😊 I live on the east coast so I understand the misery you speak of. I also tend to get depressed towards the holidays & that’s just around the corner. Lol “he who shall not be named”. I wonder who that could be.🤔😒 Anyways, I wish you well & please keep us updated regarding your agoraphobia. I’m still working on my recovery and it’s not easy. Good hearing from you my friend. 💜 ❤️

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hello Reneé! Yes, this east coast weather has been so nasty and rainy and grey, I think it's natural to get the seasonal blahs. And holidays nearing never helps. In terms of my agoraphobia, I have my good days and bad days. I'm sure you know how that goes... The struggle is real! ☺ I've been forcing myself to go out at least once a week. I filmed one of my exposure therapy videos a few days ago, when I went for a walk, but unfortunately I had my finger over the mic, so no sound picked up. (Story of my life, Lol.) I'll be recording another one on my walk Thursday, and I'll put it up Friday. I hope you've been doing well, dear friend. Much respect and love, and talk soon. Thanks for always checking in, and for your continued care and support.

[@heartslove1942]

Hey Jason! I like your hat! I was about to text you yesterday or today, if I hadn’t heard from you so perfect timing. Wishing you the best. Take care of yourself!!!! 💙💙💙💙💙 Edit: don’t ever feel guilty! We are never mad; we are just blessed by your presence, thankful you are even on YT.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hiya Annie! That's funny, I swear we think of each other at the same times! I was going to text you, too, and explain why I hadn't uploaded in a min. Then I figured it'd make more sense to let everyone know, cuz I didn't want anyone to worry. Thanks for your continued care, concern, support and friendship. I appreciate it so very much, and cherish you, dear friend. 💛💛💙💛💛

[@StraightTalkinFedoraChic]

Jason, your hat rocks! Maybe we should start a hat club...sort of like that Toronto group -- hats on for awareness.

[@TheseFourWalls]

@@StraightTalkinFedoraChic Thanks, friend! And that's actually a very interesting idea. (I have a crap-ton of hats, too!)

[@imjustanasshlesometimes3488]

I feel ya.... Minnesota is the same. Then with my PTSD, Nov- Feb I'm in a funk. Best way I can explain it. Lots of love. Wishing you the best ❤

[@TheseFourWalls]

Same here... My worst months are October - February. It's cold, grey, bleak.... It depresses me, and makes me anxious. When the snow piles on, I easily feel trapped. And the symptoms of my CPTSD get so much worse during those months. Thanks for the kindness, the comment, and the identifying. I feel so lucky that we are all here for each other, supporting each other however we can. Much respect and love, my friend. 💜💛💜 Be well.

[@imjustanasshlesometimes3488]

@@TheseFourWalls I completely understand. I live in the country.... And winters here get -40 and tons of snow. I feel so trapped too. As I get older, the winters seem to drag on way too long. Lots of love, dear ❤

[@sarah29880]

Hey Jason. Take all the time you need 💕💕💕, looking out for yourself is a huge accomplishment on this journey. So easy to look past how far you really have come with all of this. You are doing great 👍.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you so much, dear friend. You've supported me from the beginning, and I can't thank you enough for the care, encouragement, and kind words. You are such a sweet soul. You're golden. And I deeply appreciate you, my friend. ✌😊💛

[@sarahkalnajs5810]

Me too!

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hey Sarah! Yeah, seasonal depression isn't very much fun... Sorry to hear you experience it as well. I know a LOT of people who experience it much worse than me, so in that sense, I'm lucky. Plus, I've got a great support network here on my channel, and in my personal life. Thank you so much for commenting, and remember; seasons come and go, and so will the depression. Much respect and love, friend. ✌☺

[@myriahramos9672]

Looking good J!! Miss you Always! I’m currently in out patient, and back on a low dose maintenance med... it’s helpful.. ✨💛💖 dont listen to the HaTeRs, Do U!!!

[@TheseFourWalls]

I'm so happy for you, Myriah! Your recovery is obviously front and center. You're absolutely making the BEST decision for you, and I couldn't be more proud. You're making it, gurl! You're doing it! Thanks for all your love and support, my sweet friend. You're a beautiful person, in every way. And I'm always just a phone call or text away. Xxxxx💜 (Ps, miss you too)

[@StraightTalkinFedoraChic]

you're lookin' good Jason. the hat rocks. I get the Autumn blues too where I get so down, It is physiclly difficult to leave the apartment. So I get where you're coming from. I like the colours of fall, but not the rest that goes with it. Looking forward to your livestream this Saturday.

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thanks for the kind comment, and ALL your support, my dear. You have all my love and support in return. I look forward to seeing you Saturday. It's also been an honor to watch your channel grow. You're a sweet, warm, carefree soul. I cherish our friendship. ✌💛

[@AwkwardAnxiousJennifer]

It's good to hear from you. I'm glad you're trying to get back into your channel. I know how hard it can be to get back into it after being away for a while. I won't be able to catch your live stream now that I have a "real job," but I'm glad you're doing it. Winter is the worst season for me, but it's not that rainy here in the fall. That would bother me for sure. Anyway, glad to see you again!

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hey Jennifer! So nice to see you, friend. Yes, it has been tricky to get back into the kind of "flow" I had started to feel, in terms of building my channel and putting out content... But life's starting to feel more routine again, so balance is returning. 😊 Winter is a time I dread... I'm always cold anyways, but then add the -20 degree days we're now prone to here in upstate... Ugh, it's dreadful. Plus, winter is suffocating to me. Bleak. Isolating. (And coming from an agoraphobic, you'd think I wouldn't mind that last part, lol. But it's a different feeling of isolation. I don't know how to explain it.) Thank you for dropping by, friend. Your care and support has meant a lot to me. And I'm proud, watching your channel grow. Thanks for being a friend, Jennifer. Talk again soon. ✌💛

[@cindybriggs2725]

I hear you friend i go through it every year love you friend

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hopefully this year will be a tad easier for us all, now that we all have the support of one another. 😊 Thank you for all of your continued kindness and support, sweet friend. I feel blessed every day, to have you all in my life. Much love and warm thoughts to you, Cindy. 💙💛💙

[@candiceyoung8244]

Hey my friend, its good to see you, you look well,i look forward to ur live,take care😘❤💜

[@TheseFourWalls]

Thank you, dear friend. I truly appreciate your friendship and support, Candice. I'm always overwhelmed, in the best way possible, by all of the warm comments you all leave. I don't know how I got so lucky to have so many wonderful new friends, (cuz none of you are "subscribers" to me, your my friends) but I'm deeply moved, and eternally grateful to you (all). ✌☺💛 Take care, dear. Much respect, love and appreciation.

[@candiceyoung8244]

@@TheseFourWalls you're so welcome,,i feel we're all blessed to have found our little community. Im sorry uv been having a tough time lately, but the people who care will be here for you,,love to you my friend 😘❤

[@sackytacky]

Hi Jason. Great to hear from you. Glad to see your looking so well. Had a quick view of your vids and was so glad to see you doing well. Big difference from a year ago all round...your vids should act as optimism for anyone else coming off opiates and dealing with ment health issues. I suffer from seasonal affective disorder as well (sad) . Starts in October and lasts until til about spring. Might use a sun lamp this year to help with extra rays to help with endorphin production (now that I'm having to rely on them naturally)...keep up those positive vibes man!

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hey friend! So nice hearing from you, too! Seasonal affective disorder is tough, I certainly sympathize with all the many who suffer with it. Thankfully, just as the seasons do, this too shall pass. And I'm here, if you ever need to talk. I really appreciate your continued kindness and support. And thank you for such an encouraging comment; I think it's harder for us to personally witness change within ourselves, and how far we've come. It's nice to have someone point it out. Somedays I feel like I'm a bit stuck in a rut, but most days are good... Real good. I'm so grateful for that... To actually be feeling life - good and bad - feels like a blessing... I feel like a very different person than I was last year... Thank you guys for helping me trust in the process and keep my head above water. ✌😊✌ Be well, friend.

[@Motherlyescape]

Hey Sweetie finally making it on KZbin to catch upon all my friends😍 I was so excited to see you uploaded. I too have been battling the same thing and have been trying to pull myself out of it. Love all the fall fun and baking but hate how down and unmotivated it can make me. Hope you find yourself feeling better soon! Love you my my dear friend 😘

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hello, dear friend! It's always nice receiving a comment from you; I appreciate the kind words, the warmth, and the encouragement. All you beautiful people have kept me going, when the going got tough. I'm humbled by you all, and increadably grateful every day. Much love and light, dear friend 💛

[@Motherlyescape]

@@TheseFourWalls 😘💪💯💜

[@heddashaven6900]

You've got nothing to apologise for, darling Jay. I know what you mean about the lack of motivation, but I have to keep pushing myself. That's just me, though. I have missed you terribly, but I understand completely why you've pulled back. There are always going to be toxic pockets online that we don't like. I know I find them very draining. As for he who shall not be named, he is a scourge on the community. The weather here has been dark, grey, dull, rain and wind. Not great when we have depression. We just have to sit together, and wait out the winter months, until the warmer sunny times return. In the meantime, please remember how much you are loved. You're never alone. With tons of love as always, from your big sister Hedda xxxxx

[@TheseFourWalls]

I'm glad I have your hand to hold this winter, Hedda. Your friendship and your increadably kind, authentic nature have helped me thru some dark times. I'm eternally grateful for you. You'll always have all my love and support. And The Haven will always feel like a lovely, warm home-away-from-home. Love you, sis. Thanks for everything.

[@heddashaven6900]

@@TheseFourWalls Jay, if I was given the chance to do only 2 things for you, it would be to listen while you talked to me, and then to hold your hand, whenever you needed me to. I genuinely love you, Jay. My husband doesn't always get it when I try to explain the feelings between people in online relationships, whether they be platonic, like ours, or romantic - he feels it's not real unless you physically meet the person. I told him that souls can recognise each other, from lifetime to lifetime. I told him that when you and I met online, it was as if we had known each other before, and that it has always been platonic - it's been a family link, time after time, even with the genders swapping places. (He has an open mind when it comes to past lives) So when I told him that my soul recognised yours, and that we had been brother and sister, then he began to understand it. When I call you my brother, it feels right. When you call me your sister, again, it feels right. The love I have for you is very protective, Jay. That's why it's important for you to know that I'm still holding your hand, and protecting you. And, of course, naturally loving my little brother. xxxxx

[@TheseFourWalls]

@@heddashaven6900 Hedda, you brought tears of pure joy and gratitude to my eyes. I love you to the moon. And you ARE my sister. I have no question that I knew you the moment I met you. Like I've said to you before, I'm naturally guarded and withdrawn... It takes A LOT for me to feel close to someone... But not with you. With you, it was instantly "I know this woman, I trust this woman, I SEE this woman".... I'm honored that you see me too, and that you call me little brother. Because I truly love you like family, my dear sister Hedda.

[@kerryirving2949]

Nice to see you Jason

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hello Kerry, my friend! Nice to see you too. Thank you for your continued friendship and support. It means a great deal to me. I hope you've been doing well, dear friend. Much love and support to you, Talk soon. ✌😊✌

[@kerryirving2949]

These Four Walls I'm not well at the minuite Jason but to much to go into at the minuite. Thank you for your comment Jason, means a lot! . I hope to make your livestream on Saturday

[@TheseFourWalls]

@@kerryirving2949 I'm so sorry to hear that you're going through a rough patch, my dear. You've always been here, supporting, and sharing your kindness... You're an absolute gem, and I'm lucky to be able to call you a friend. I wish there was some way for me to make things better for you, Kerry. Just remember, I'm always here to talk, if you need. Much love and appreciation to you, dear friend. ✌💛😊

[@kerryirving2949]

These Four Walls That comment is lovley Jason! Thank you very much for your words! ❤️. I might sometime Jason or say some of it in the livestream depending what the livestream is about. Do you mean there's another way I could talk to you? I don't want to trigger you or anybody or make things worse for you as your not well at the moment either

[@TheseFourWalls]

@@kerryirving2949 Please feel free to share whatever you're comfortable sharing with me, anytime you want. We're friends, and I'm here for you. It's so kind of you to think about triggering me or someone else, but I want you to know I'm here to listen to you, and offer support wherever I can. Feel free to email me, anytime. My email is Zennorjd82 @ gmail (. com) ..... (Sorry I had to write my email out like that, but if i just try to write it out as-is, KZbin blocks it.) Reach out anytime. I look forward to hearing from you. (Ps: also, feel free to bring up whatever you're comfortable with in my livestreams. 💛✌

[@littlesteph777]

[@TheseFourWalls]

Much, much love to you, Steph. My sishter for life. You are the beautiful silver-lining that made knowing that horrible man - "he who shall not be named" - all worth it. I'm truly grateful every day for your friendship. I will be in touch very soon, sweetheart. 💛💙💛 Love you.

[@littlesteph777]

@@TheseFourWalls awww that made my morning thank you. I feel exactly the same. Hope to hear from you soon. Love you too 💜💜💜

[@Ebbinge777]

I figure you’re not going to do a livestream today anymore... I hope everything is alright. Maybe you’ll stream next week? -Glaucus

[@TheseFourWalls]

Hello Glaucus, my friend. Thank you for checking in with me, and I'm so very sorry for missing another live stream. Unfortunately, due to a blown transformer, my neighborhood had no power today, from 9 am this morning until about an hour ago. So I'll be going live tomorrow instead, at 4 pm EST. I'm sorry for any inconvenience, and I hope to chat then. Have a wonderful evening. ✌😊