Decluttering Q&A

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[@alicejohns8535]

When my son was little we had 3 categories. 1. Throw it away. 2. Give it away. 3. Put it away. Easy to remember for him. Now as a grown-up he is much less messy than I am.

[@lauriekuhlmann3381]

I am helping my MIL clean out the very small kitchen in her apartment. She is no longer cooking, so there was a lot of trash and duh donations. However, at one point the phrase “where would you look for this first” popped out of my mouth😂 It worked great, she immediately pointed to a drawer and said that is where she would look for it first. Done!

[@ptcreations8947]

I remember the first time I had THAT moment... it was like "Ohh!" ❤

[@MissTiffanyK1]

I ask my 5 year old the question, "where would you look for this first?" and he doesn't hesitate, just puts the new/random thing away! He definitely doesn't have my overthinking problem!

[@olivemaycards]

We helped a relative who had a massive pile of paperwork from 1980-2020 and SO MUCH of it was envelopes and extra sheets with just an address or a non-discrimination policy or other completely generic trash. I was able to avoid getting overwhelmed by just starting looking for the trash. Even just taking everything out of envelopes and recycling them makes paperwork easier to handle.

[@ImLunaShesZeta]

Awesome job helping your relative. Stories like this really encourage me, and makes me glad I found people like Dana by the time I was 25.

[@amybee40]

I've done the same with my mom. Envelopes, duplicates, junk mail...

[@mariahwilson6505]

The look at 15:08!!! “There’s no way I would put trash in those super important paper boxes”. 😂😂

[@notnotnever]

I love to see you modeling self- acceptance by saying (paraphrasing) "I don't know when things leave my hands, and it's ok- I do a five minute pickup to get things functional and I don't have to fundamentally change how I am" 🤩🤩 Thank you Dana! And Reid!

[@micheledryden1057]

My daughter and I have been helped by your videos and books!!! I'm not certified by your system but she's going to pay me to help her declutter. Her hubby has been impressed with the dwindling piles in my home, especially my guest room. My hubby gave me the best compliment recently. He's thankful for how hard I work to keep our home clean! This month I'm adding a new system to manage: creating a weekly menu using what I have on hand. It's lowered my stress level, given me direction to take things out of the freezer beforehand, saved me loads of time, and lowered my grocery bill. Thank you so much, Dana!!!

[@sct4040]

Sounds wonderful! Sounds like you did a great job. Why does your daughter have to pay you though?

[@countryfrau8328]

OMGosh, Dana! I've never heard anyone else say that they put things down without awareness of it. I do that CONSTANTLY. This is SO VALUABLE for me to hear.

[@vivianhudacek1556]

Me too!

[@andreaf.6572]

I once had a 2 liter bottle of coke on the middle of the living room floor?? How in the heck did that get there?? (I live alone fyi - so it was me)

[@vivianhudacek1556]

@@andreaf.6572 😂🤪😂🤪

[@juliewright1895]

This helped me because I don’t just put things down but two of my teenage daughters (both with ADD) do it and they always have. I’ve worked so hard to teach them to be aware but Dana helped me to realize that it’s just them and how their brains work. Now I just call them to get their stuff or we all do a 5 minute pick up, no condemnation. Dana has been so helpful to me too!!

[@countryfrau8328]

@@andreaf.6572 Ha! Love it! Are we twins?! Ha!

[@Elizabeth-490]

Dana you have truly changed not just my house, but my life. I come home from work to a tidy house, a clean kitchen where I can cook. I don’t dread doing the dishes because since I’m doing it every day the dishwasher is not overstuffed - it’s fast. My cupboards are no longer so full that it’s hard to put away clean dishes, and I don’t dread cleaning up after supper because every food storage container already has it’s lid on it. Now when my husband offers to do the dishes I usually say no thanks. I find it relaxing! We’ve been married 33 years and this pretty much shocks him. I can have overnight guests with less than a day’s notice (I usually have more notice but I could). Thank you so much!!!!

[@Muminsudbury]

Yes! You have a Canadian Decluttering Coach! I am so excited to be a part of your Team!

[@karlene1292]

I love the take it there now method. I was famous for creating multiple piles and always being "not done yet". Then I would have to scoop up all those piles and hide them when I was "cleaning".

[@Cecily-Pimprenelle]

Yes. Love it. I’m not very good at implementing it yet, so I do have to deal with kind-of-messy micro-piles, but ”don’t pull everything out” still has an effect on the global messiness even if the method is Improperly Applied. And having ”checked” that what Dana says clicks with me and actually works does encourage me to do the steps properly. (Next: take the Donation Box to the charity shop... the problem is that I walk everywhere, the box is heavy, and it’s not easy to park at the store I wanted to go... BUT we need a dining table and their sister-shop a little further with a parking lot is the one that sells furniture, so I think we’ll be able to manage a Swap. Next box will be smaller, just in case heavy items also find their way in)

[@cindamersel4580]

Dana’s “take it there now” is a game changer.

[@rosywilson3076]

‘I rebel against people being too cheerful about this’ 🤣 love it 😂

[@stephaniewilliams7318]

I kept bank statements for YEARS. Neatly filed in date order, by account, taking up precious space in my tiny house. When I ‘needed’ to access them for a mis-sold ‘payment protection insurance’ claim, the bank didn’t accept liability anyway! That was the point I realised that holding on to all this ‘important’ stuff was futile, and got rid of the lot. Now everything is electronic, no need for me to keep much at all, just passport, birth certificate, driving license, educational certificates. I think in the US, you need to keep health insurance related documentation, whereas our information is all in the NHS electronic record.

[@gbk1t]

For anyone reading this. I want to say that Dana’s methods really do work. If you are feeling overwhelmed, just watch her videos, or even better, buy the books. It will be the best money you ever spend. Thankyou Dana. X. Keep doing the dishes !!!

[@lindawade9647]

I feel motivated when I listen to you. I have been making a lot of progress decluttering and digging myself out of excess items. I feel so much better after getting things out of my home. I even began recently enjoying decluttering. How shocking. :)

[@janethunt4037]

Thank you for saying that you have not "arrived" yet, that decluttering is a continuing thing to do. That is just the reality.

[@gapeach51170]

Maybe I am different , but I never go to someone's house and look or ask about something I gave them. Once it's theirs they can do with it as they wish. Your advice for paper clutter is exactly what I did. I had 6 file boxes and 1 rubber maid bin of paper. My first sort was 2 piles. Trash and keep(to go through after I got rid of all the trash) , it really did make the pile SO much less to deal with.

[@Serena.Hope.Eternal]

That's exactly what I did!! It worked so wonderfully. 🤗 Now I just need to go through and decide on what I initially kept. 🤪 Something else that has helped me has been to make decisions going forward from now with what I have currently. I'm no longer boxing things up to deal with on some far-off day that never arrives. For the last year, I have used two baskets. One basket has the very important definite papers I need to deal with....and the other basket has time will tell items in it. What I'm doing now is to determine if a binder or file system would work best for the truly important items I am going to keep. This is more of a trial-and-error for me at this point. Now that I have so much less paperwork to deal with ~ it actually seems doable now. 🥰 🧘‍♀️ 🦋🕊🦋

[@gapeach51170]

@@Serena.Hope.Eternal , I finally finished my "keep" pile from the initial sort. I put two file boxes in our burn pile and the keep was very small. I have been dealing with mail as it comes in ...so far so good...we shall see :) I am a butterfly (from Cas's quiz) so I bought a 3 tier basket thing from Amazon to hang on the wall so it's visual and I don't "forget" about the paper.

[@Serena.Hope.Eternal]

@@gapeach51170 that's great Laura! I look forward to finishing my initial paperwork. No actually ~ I look forward to already being done with it! 😉 🤣 😂 🥰 I must be a butterfly too. If I don't see it ~ I don't remember or think about it. Out of sight out of mind. 🙈

[@glendaw5221]

I am ALMOST able to do a 5 minute pickup and get my house back in order. Still working on clothes.

[@karlene1292]

Thank you for all your tips. Your realistic attitude and process really resonates with me!

[@suestewart546]

I was introduce to you while watching The Minimal Mom a few years ago. Although I don't have the same hang-ups about stuff that you have explained many people face ,your explanations have helped me to understand these folks. I have several in my own life and now have some effective but kind strategies to address their clutter IF they ask for help. Thank you so much for all you say and model in your own life.

[@sct4040]

1) I pretend I live in a TINY HOUSE, and ask myself what are the stuff most important to me and what I would keep. That mind set really help me. 2) don’t buy any organization gadgets, baskets, until you toss/trash first.

[@cassierittenhouse7351]

Super cute hair cut! 😍

[@tanyacampbell9167]

Hi Dana. I love the idea of the five minute pickup. This has been a major game changer for me.

[@cheerfulmouse]

My favorite decluttering language you use is ... "Doo-Lolly" Absolutely love it 💕 😘

[@karenelliott8046]

Your haircut! Love it!

[@GoingGreenMom]

For the person choosing a closet or dresser, I found that knowing I was a visual person was a huge help. Cas from Clutterbug has a quiz, and the options are basically butterfly (visual with big categories), bee (visual with lots of little categories), ladybug (hidden with big categories), and cricket (hidden with lots of little categories). So, once you know that, I found that a dresser didn't work for me because I forgot there was stuff in it, I just put folded clothes on a shelf in my closet and hang most things. So if I was choosing furniture to work for that, I would probably choose a wardrobe or open closet rod. Oh, and I use a clear plastic shoebox for socks and underwear. I don't own a dresser for clothes, and my kids don't either. Open top boxes or shelves and hanging what works for that works for our butterfly house.

[@laurahudson8210]

I've discovered that I'm a butterfly with ladybug leanings. I have an open walk-in closet with no door. I used Ikea Cube shelving to build a storage bed for myself. And folded clothes sheets towels Etc go in the individual bins oh, that are open topped. And while I do fold the sheets and towels and sometimes will fold the shirts, I usually just toss everything in. It has been a huge help in corralling my stuff

[@katie7748]

YES! And you can be a mix of them. Or one bug in one room, another in a different one.

[@GoingGreenMom]

@@katie7748 definitely! My sewing stuff leans toward bee territory!

[@MegOfBroccoli]

I don't own a dresser either but its because I stopped owning enough to fill it. The insect analogy never worked for me. Everyone probably does a little of each one depending on the item. When I decluttered, my biggest goal was having as much empty space as possible. I effectively didn't want any stand-alone storage. What I learned was this takes your possessions closer and closer to zero. 😅

[@amywjn]

I have listened to all your audiobooks. They are all great!! You did an amazing job. 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

[@marygueldenzoph7317]

She really does do a great job. It doesn’t even sound like she’s reading…she’s just chatting with a friend. Easy to listen to and GREAT information!

[@janethunt4037]

I agree. All 3 were great in that format.

[@lisalyons5878]

??? What do I say to family members who counter the container concept with, “There’s plenty of room for more containers! Look-I can stack them up three or four high!” And do. Love you and your process, Dana.

[@Cecily-Pimprenelle]

Well, at some point, there will NOT be more room for more containers on the shelf/corner/whatever? If the person can maintain their stuff with so many stacked containers, then I guess it’s ok?

[@subknit]

I have one of these too! If there’s empty space, there’s room for more containers. We have no empty horizontal surfaces.

[@grutarg2938]

Dana says that containers can’t take up space you & your family need for living your life. You need living room floor space for kids to play. You need kitchen counter space for cooking food. You need to be able to walk around without bumping into things. She also says you need to be able to get to things easily. That way you can put it all away in 5 minutes, and you can find stuff when you want it without having to dig through a stack of containers.

[@lisalyons5878]

Great replies! Thank you. Certain people in the family essentially containerize their hoard. Not a good example for the kids. I suspect what Dana would say is, work on my areas and the common areas and hope they come around. As their actual living space gets smaller and smaller…

[@debbiev.1311]

SO GRATEFUL🙏🏻😊 once again for the replay, because sadly 😔 I missed another Live!! Dana, you're AWESOME!! ❤🤗

[@loriz.5771]

I Love the fact that you gave voice to "current mobility" ! For those of us w chronic health issues, this is important to give ourselves space when we need it and credit for accomplishments 🌹

[@juliashearer7842]

You deserve so many more subscribers...I hope the numbers keep increasing...your method is just so helpful for getting past overwhelm, making progress and building momentum. Of the three of you in "Take your House Back" you are the only one I subscribe to.

[@jenniferikelman5516]

For the person who has keys on the table, I would just put a basket on the table. Keys (wallet and glasses) can go in the basket. The basket can be easily moved for meals.

[@heatherburrill]

I have just recently found you on KZbin (thanks to Dawn, Minimal Mom - she is also amazing!) When I am looking for an item in my house I often say “if I were a flashlight (for instance) where would I be?” On reflection luckily I have not had to ask that question of flashlights or I might have been totally in the dark. That being said I love the question you ask for finding homes for things. I also love that there is a person with an artist’s mind that is helping with organizing process. It seems as though you have the missing piece to the decluttering process that I have been looking for. I am a Long Covid sufferer who needs to move my life several thousand miles to get family help to manage daily living tasks. The 5 minute task is a life line. ☺ thank you so much

[@lesb9613]

Reality sucks. We helped my Mom clean out her house to move to assisted living. I realized the more space you have, the more you can store. The reality is, her grown children (Mom is 89) don't have room for all her shit. Sentimental items and valuables maybe. I am grateful to hear for going through this now, painful as it is.

[@MegOfBroccoli]

Keys on the dining table - great example of if your table is cleared any time it's not being used, keys would look so out of place that I'd want to put them "where" they actually go. Plus keys are filthy and most people don't spray or wipe their keys. You don't want them on your table.

[@taraamundson1140]

You can learn something from doing the 5 minute pick up or you could try this one thing I did with my son. When he did something wrong, I would have him repeat 10 times what he was going to do next time. For example, “I will put my back pack on the hook when I come home from school.” It really helped.

[@findingaway5512]

😂 The best. 😂😂😂😂 I laugh at your jokes too. The lemonade tip is great. I love your humor Dana.

[@deenebrakefield1798]

Your cupboards are always open!!!! Hahahaha thank you🤩 I truly feel better!

[@beachprints]

This is so helpful! I have had many times, most of the time over the past year or so that I was so focused on decluttering that I didn't get the regular dusting, vacuuming etc. done. I had a couple of years before that where I struggled to do anything due to major depression. I am doing better now. Still not really in a routine to get everything done, I am doing better in keeping up with the dishes most of the time. I love how you use one tiny step at a time. I love that even if I only get one or two things done in decluttering, it is still progress and only progress. Watching your videos has helped me make a major shift in feeling better about my process. Thank you!

[@heathercheatham2598]

You did such a great job! The nice thing is this time wasn’t too far off from your last declutter and you could see what you had used since then and sometimes there’s a hang up until you get to your second (or third +) declutter then you all of a sudden just feel free to get rid of it. Embracing that container concept!!!! Nice! You could hang your ribbons stuff up then get him some shelves later- since you work with the ribbon it might help you to use this as a decluttering project by putting them up. I really appreciate your willingness to share the realties of your space and also sharing what you feel comfortable sharing to help others who struggle.

[@ashleyfarnsworth9355]

Love the haircut!

[@georgebricker2224]

A good second thing to do after "Do the dishes" which is a wonderful thing is "Do a load of laundry". That means wash, dry, fold, and put away. Yes put away. The average household has four people. Each person makes at least a shirt, pair of socks, and underwear each day. Also maybe a towel depending on how often they bathe. Not going into that one. That is four shirts, four pairs of socks, and four pairs of underwear. Almost a load every day. Especially when you add a few towels and other things that crop up. Like Dana says time yourself. Maybe five minutes to get the clothes into the basket, 5 to get to the washer and get it started. Now go do something else for the 25 to 30 minutes while it washes. Put a timer on if you need to to remember that it will be done then throw into the dryer. Maybe 3 minutes. Set for your desired drying time and again go do something else and set a timer if you must. Next take it out fold and put away. With it being a single load that may take 10 minutes and voila the laundry pile is less. Doing this every other day and your laundry will seem way less daunting. Try it.

[@katie7748]

Each day of the week in our house is dedicated to a specific thing as far as laundry goes. Either an individual person (or two), bedding, towels, things than need to be washed on delicate cycle and hang dried...I don't usually have more than two or maybe three loads per day this way and it doesn't pile up (as long as I stay on top of it haha). It seems to work great for us and I'm so blessed not to need a laundromat anymore!!!!

[@grutarg2938]

For me it's just "put laundry away". Washing it is a routine that happens without needing reminders, but the putting away is the hard part for me.

[@Elizabeth-490]

I have the audiobook “how to manage..” and love it! I had no problem with your reading of it.

[@StellaClare29]

45:32 this is so great, Dana. I love you encouraging ways that work at every level ❤

[@cyclone8644]

Joyous win...... I've donated so many things lately that I've run out of donateable donate boxes!!! On to the BLACK trashbags!

[@ornellazamboni1623]

Thank you, thank you, grazie mille for just being so (naturally!) similar to me that you are constantly helping me understand how to go ahead and really do things.

[@Maylis98]

Last week I went to my parents house which is crazy with stuff (but far from hoarding). I told my mom that I would help her with one area if she wanted to. We spent two hours on a corner of a counter. I asked her if there was trash (it was mostly paper) and she said probably but it wasn't easy to see so we went through it all. We got rid of a bunch. But they craziest is my dad who started to go through his things without me saying anything.

[@beachprints]

Yes! I have learned by timing myself that the dishes usually only takes about 10 minutes. Even if behind, maybe it may take 15 minutes.

[@springrain777]

Really helpful you actually playing out the scenario for the children (around 24 mins) !!! THANK YOU !!! To think, actually, just to even think about' things ' & its value is new to them for a start!👍🏼

[@denisemarie6131]

can we declutter the yt ads?! ; ) Thanks for answering our questions, Dana!

[@kathystearns9012]

I laughed when you described different things because you were talking about me 😅

[@suecustard5725]

What do you do when most of the clutter belongs to your husband, and every time you try to address it, we end up getting in an argument over it ? He does not seem to understand why fishing poles, tools and propane bottles for camp stoves etc. belong in the garage and not the living room ! He just says " why do you get to keep your things in here, and all my things have to go to the garage or the basement" . He jut doesn't get it, he thinks my books, decor, pillows, pictures etc are the clutter and unnecessary items, while his things are purposeful and useful and it's so frustrating ! I love my husband and we have been together for 30 years, but I'm tired of being embarrassed to have people over because of the way our home looks. Please help !

[@Cecily-Pimprenelle]

Well, decor and pillows are not useful - not the way fishing tools, tools, camp stoves are. But WHERE would he use those? For the fishing rod, if he just walks there, maybe the closet in the entryway is a better place, for instance. And isn’t there a safety issue with propane bottles in the house? I mean, it sounds like part of these things aren’t meant to be used in the living room (apart from the occasional tool), so maybe use the ”where would it be more practical for you to store these so you can do an easy grab-and-go” approach. And maybe a solution will be to have a (pretty) tool cabinet in the living room. Or even a fishing rods stand, because he thinks they’re pretty to look at, who knows. It might bee worth taking a couple pictures off the wall to make room for it, because it’s better than them just floating around. And/or leaving the best spots of the garage for his stuff, so he doesn’t need to dig in a corner to find them? It also feels like it’s an organising question more than a decluttering one - you seem to be wanting for his stuff to be in their homes, not for him to reduce the number of things he has? Good luck!

[@grutarg2938]

Cecile B had a great answer. I would add that Dana suggests continuing to declutter your own stuff - maybe there are a few pillows or decor items you can get rid of. When your parts of the space are all clean & decluttered and he’s seen you making an effort, then he might be more willing to follow your example.

[@ucfhillcollege8296]

I would make a cute spot in a corner with his fishing poles with a cute flower pot or a wall decor rack with them. Perhaps he is trying to tell you that he does not feel represented in the living room.

[@anitajohnson782]

Could you take photos of the living room and sit down together and work out where his belongings can find a home?

[@kennethbailey9853]

Thankyou!

[@brightpage1020]

Hello, Beautiful! Lookin’ good! Thanks for this informative Q & A! Cheers to your continued success!

[@toniswope8759]

Omg i love it! Say sqeeze boatle one more time!! You are so cute and relatable.

[@MegOfBroccoli]

Don't nag your friends. If someone complains about their house, I say one time "let me know if you ever want help." I don't return to the topic if I'm in their home and they haven't done a thing. They're my friend! I don't care how they live as long as it's not a public health hoarding thing.Back off other people, if you said you're available to help, leave it. Don't keep asking or nagging them. Adults can live how they want. They know you want to help, so otherwise drop it. If you don't have to live there, don't bug people about their home.

[@mariaewerth670]

❤

[@lesb9613]

What do I do with negatives?

[@girlonaswing9439]

I have a question for EVERYONE. Do you read in bed or have an area that you do your reading?

[@lucystrider728]

Yes I love to read in bed! I got a bedside ipad holder that I can swivel overhead and read without holding it, play games, or watch movies! Very relaxing. I listen to ebooks or nature sounds to go to sleep if I am not very sleepy. I don't find it distacting, but I know a lot of people do.

[@Cecily-Pimprenelle]

No special place for reading here. In bed, or on any chair, or in the couch, etc.

[@grutarg2938]

My favorite place to read is in the bath.

[@DazzleDust32]

Hi, Dana. Question: What's a squeezeball?!

[@barbarapinto2305]

?if you have no mud room, no entrance area, where do you put your purse and keys, etc?

[@sandys315]

I found a very narrow table and put a tiny basket for keys - put purse next to the basket and shoes on the shelf underneath. It’s 9” deep and 24” wide and actually tucks partially behind a chair next to the door. That’s it . Purse keys phone shoes. I hang coats in the laundry across from washer n dryer. Our front door opens directly into the living room. I call that table my landing spot. Moving it with me to a new house… it’s priceless ! Garage sale find $10

[@micheleohmer4117]

A wall shelf and or hooks wherever it's convenient.

[@aprilhoover3481]

Hubs and I walk all the way through the house to our shared office before we let go of anything. He has a basket on his desk for wallet, keys, glasses, receipts, and all his pocket clutter. My stuff lands on the drafting table - purse, work bags, totes, glasses, keys, paperwork, mail. There's no rule that all that stuff needs to live by the exterior door.

[@Jeanniebugg]

Hang a hook on the wall?

[@marymaryquitecontrary]

I hung an attractive hook rack (backing with five hooks on it) in the front hall for reusable bags, colorful scarves and even a jacket at times. Such racks sometimes come with a shelf or hanging container for those who need to drop keys or store outgoing mail, books, or returns.

[@andie3131]

My daughter will find a place to shove it….. she doesn’t understand how to keep a clean room.

[@andie3131]

Oh and she’s 12….

[@beccismith4454]

Paper clutter… The advice you give at about 15 minutes in is something that I thought about and found pertinent for online decluttering as well… The other day I had about an hour of time to sat and focus on my emails, and sifted out I don’t know how many…! hundreds probably.📧🪄🗑✨🤗 I have had the same address for many years, some things I have kept in the past intentionally, even putting them into folders within my email account, otherwise I never even read or read once and didn’t return to… Lots of advertising emails or interesting newsletters etc. So I went through different categories and different senders etc., and deleted a lot. Not everything, but then I realized, but wait! I now have looked into these folders or looked at these categories, and now I know better what’s there! And made the connection with this strategy that Dana talks about. So even if I still have a couple of things in a folder that I think maybe I don’t need anymore, it’s slimmer and easier to get a feel for the next time I’m looking at it or perhaps actually looking for something. 😊✨🧚‍♀️