Dating Problems & The Queer Ultimatum

[@AmbersCloset]

Should I do a video breaking down each person on the show?!

[@ehiobanor]

Yes!!!!! I’ve only seen one video that did this by Indie Nile here on YT, and they did amazing.

[@paulina.b]

Yes please 👏 🙌

[@meridithcortes9286]

A thousand percent yes !

[@iamqueenoftheworld]

Absolutely

[@AutBops]

Definitely 🙌🏼🙌🏼

[@Jessica-pn5ri]

Emotional maturity was a huge factor in all of the relationships on the show. It's hard to deal with someone in a relationship when you know they are not thinking big picture or can't reason on your level.

[@AmbersCloset]

💯‼️‼️

[@LifeAsDaphneOh]

"women are difficult" I felt that all the way through lol 🤣

[@AmbersCloset]

🤣🤣😅😅

[@roxywyndham]

What I realized from my last relationship with the help of my therpaist is that not everything needs to be a discussion, sometimes someone just needs their feeling validated and not analyzed. My mind automatically finds things that done make sense and want to call it out but I now realize it doesn’t have to make sense to me, I just need to hear what they feel and give them reassurance. This doesn’t mean all the time but sometimes you need to just let a person feel their feels because we all want to just feel our feels and know that our partner will be there to listen and validate.

[@AmbersCloset]

Absolutely!!👏🏽👏🏽

[@cheralewhite8253]

Big facts! Cause sometimes what needs said, has been pent up for so long. It just needs to be shared, but not always easy to do so when the other half is all about being dismissive or having an answer at the ready. Like let someone get what they need to say out, and sit back and marinate on it a little. Might wind up with something new and unexpectedly helpful for you and the relationship, to progress.

[@itstherealwonderwoman7436]

Such a good conversation! My ex was emotionally immature. To her, I was wrong for having boundaries and being upset bc she kept stomping all over them. The relationship was so exhausting. I ran so fast from her.

[@deedeesmexilife861]

I feel that people don't really connect to one another, and most are just hearing but not listening. I'm a Virgo sun, but my rising is Scorpio and my moon Aries. I am honest, sometimes too honest, I have heard. I don't feel that's a negative, I simply say what I mean and mean what I say. I do not like my time wasted nor do I waste other's time. The more deeper I get into my higher self, I realized I'm a Heyoka empath (not in the traditional way but my character and energy), I FEEL people on such a deeper level than they do me. That has caused some issues because they can't get away with things with me when I'm tapped in. Sometimes it feels like a gift and a curse 😂...but I digress. I'm wonderfully and beautifully made😌🙌

[@AmbersCloset]

know exactly how you feel…we’re a lot alike!

[@deedeesmexilife861]

@AmbersCloset I noticed that the alike-ness. It's what made me subscribe and tune into your channel more. That's pretty dope 😊.

[@1hanakimi]

Just glad to see you back Amber!!! 💜🙌🏽 I love the thought of visualizing yourself in the audience in order to see the full picture of what’s going on! Because the feelings are going to be felt, but it’s always a good idea to have as clear of a perspective as possible! ✨

[@Cherokee.Sunrise44]

Amber, the more you balance out your own emotional intelligence, you become less and less of a datable option for the average person. You will have to understand this and sift through the rifraff before going out on dates to avoid wasting your time ❤

[@AmbersCloset]

Absolutely🙏🏽

[@Bella_Mash2]

So true!!

[@reetanruutu]

Nice insights ! especially the part about looking at the situation from 'way above'

[@KarinaCappucci]

Emotional maturity is very important. I've been on both ends. I've been in a relationship where I was the one that needed to deal with my own shit. I'm not afraid to admit that either. The last girl I dated had a lot of things going on but she would take it out on me. I would try to listen and be there for her but ultimately I realized we were just incompatible as people.

[@deedeesmexilife861]

Emotional maturity yes! My ex fiance...whewww...you get tired of trying to show people who you are. Folks dont deal with their trauma and triggers and then they roll it into a relationship. Furthermore, they refuse to hear anything about changing and growing in a healthy way. Oh and the Virgo stating facts...yessss!! They try to deter and deflect because 9/10 they were point blank wrong💁.

[@GirlGeekLovesStampin]

Thank you for all the efforts you make to share love, peace, and wisdom! I really enjoyed the Queer Ultimatum and watched the whole series twice! My fav person was Mal, and it had a great variety of couples. Future videos: Do you know anything about professional matchmakers?

[@briannaspeezy4258]

Amber thank you for this content. You aiight friend? I felt your passion. Anyway, I didn’t mind the Queer Ultimatum drama/entertainment. The one thing I didn’t like about the show was, the show failed to show queer love in a positive light. There was some good that came out of it, I’m definitely not referring to Lexi and Raelyn, that is another topic for another day. I’m referring to self reflection, cast members learning what they didn’t want in order to learn what they wanted. Lastly learning through other cast members testimonies and baggage. Hell I know a saw snippets of myself good and bad in a few cast members. Gurl, Vanessa was renting space in Lexi’s head and it didn’t help Vanessa rented some space elsewhere 😮 in Rae. I saw Rae as a go along get along girl. She likes who likes her and prefers a partner dominate so she doesn’t have to bear any of the responsibilities/emotions of the fall out….

[@srcrz718]

Bro, omg so glad you're back. You need to be more consistent. The world needs you! lol.

[@all_corrupt_everything]

Love listening to you, Amber!

[@NoBSMase]

The first point you discussed made me cry.... I'm currently residing in heartbreak hotel and I don't know how to check out because I miss him soooo much.

[@doreenlybrand6728]

Yes please!! I love your page. I'm glad you're talking about everything. ,💯🌈

[@deedeesmexilife861]

I think in 360, and most of my exes think in just 90-degree angles, and it just becomes a you vs. them thing, and my energy doesn't vibe with that. Whewww ... I've been single for 2 years, a date here and there, but folks are just not there at the levels I want or need, and Im not wasting anymore time on the "space holders." I felt this WHOLE video, Amber😂😂🙌🙌🙌. Maybe she's born with it, maybe its a Virgo thing ♍♍💯

[@jeneanadams5398]

Emotional maturity 👏

[@silk62004]

Really enjoyed this talk. Thank you for inviting us into your living room. All that was missing was something to drink and snack on together. ❤

[@twinjawns1999]

Great video amber! Love your accessories! Where did u get that lovely necklace?

[@taliacrawley5552]

Yes! The emotional immaturity Amber! I have been there/am there...being made to feel guilty for being upset with the other person 😕 uggghhh so over THAT!

[@user-hr2tu7wg9q]

Love love love ! Welcome back my babes 🎉🎉🎉

[@danyulwilliams9823]

Amber love the videos you do!!! ❤😊 Say, do more fun 🤩 videos with CASE like, vlogs, challenges, Q&As, mukbangs and more on the CASE channel!!! ❤😊

[@Grneyedspeciallady]

Just learning that you’re a Virgo, ❤❤❤, being a Libra myself I can completely relate, I haven’t seen or watched the show, shoot this is all new to me, finding myself and becoming more open to new things, coming to the realization that it’s all the same, anyhow, thank you for sharing Beautiful!! Be blessed!!❤

[@angelalogue4633]

I love your videos. So what ever you do keep them coming ❤🖤

[@fameent22]

This was a hit on video Thanks amber I honestly would like a one on one talk with you How can I get this conversation????

[@HomemakerDaze]

We're so glad you're baaaaaack x

[@CaliBredBoii]

Deep down inside Deep down inside!! 😂😂

[@AmbersCloset]

🤣🤣

[@ResistTRUMP2025]

Emotional maturity…yes!!! 👏🏽 I was immature when I got with my now husband. He supported and loved me through my growth into who I am today. We’ve been together 17 years. I doubt I would have gotten here without his belief in me. ❤

[@2mrsnenajess]

Us Virgos Need Weekly 😂 #VirgoTalks From You That Enable & Promote Our Greatness & Values. Also, I Felt Like The Ultimatum Was "Triggering" For A Lot Of Relationship Trauma Reasons & As An Empath It Was Emotional Fluctuations Throughout For Me. When The New Season Comes On You Should Do A Reactions Video For The 1st Episode Or Like A "Watch With Me" Live Because Your Facial Expressions Are Hilarious & Relatable. 😅

[@DesireesReactiverse]

I swear I love a Virgos mentality! My man is a Virgo and I swear you are a female version of him ! ❤❤❤

[@marciafab7]

Hi Amber ❤ Great vid! Sending you a big hug!

[@chavonjackson2532]

That show made me think about all the relationships I had, I've been single for 8 years I know what I want and need out of a partner

[@elisegray6962]

Amber makes me understand that I need to find a Virgo. I love people who can show their true colors without starting a war 💘

[@laredabuchanan3492]

Thank you Amber so much 🤗 I needed to hear that. 🫂

[@danegoodson7629]

All facts. Luv the content on this one #Bravo

[@djauroramusic]

you a real one 👏 love ur channel!

[@UniquelyDevineGlamHippie]

Amber I love your vibe and a lot of your content. The show focused on drama, but as others stated, it also gave us a mirror to look into. I wish they would’ve put your show on Netflix it relates so much more to our community full of love and sisterhood a little bit of seduction and lots of fun. My question is you stated that it bothers you when females change Midway, which I agree. However, your next statement was I feel your vibe, but at this time I can’t give you the type of time that you want “ hidden agenda” . now hearing this puts me under the assumption that there could be a possibility that one day you would have that type of time for me and if you feel my vibe, why wouldn’t you want to make that time for me in the future? It seems the issue could be that no matter how thorough your conversation is it requires the other person to understand exactly what is meant by the words that you speak. So to avoid the situation, possibly explain the term feeling your vibe would help the issue. A more direct set of words such as I only want a platonic relationship based on my availability, or perhaps, I’m only looking for a friend, or the easiest: I only want a friend with benefits on my terms. All of these may be more clear at least that is my opinion. Lol. 😊 FYI: I am feeling your vibe! Your ability to communicate effectively and efficiently. You’re emotional maturity, your authenticity, and your ability to focus on big picture as well as detail. 💯

[@sakiko3492]

As a fellow Virgo, I need you to know - I felt lovingly (keyword) attacked as you explained how you operate when it comes to understanding a situation. That also has a tendency to get me into trouble. When I take myself out of the equation to get a better understanding or perspective, they're quick to press that I'm cold, distant or emotionally unavailable because I won't talk about something right then and there - especially in the heat of said moment/conflict. Processing is a thing. I wish more women understood that.

[@chillie000]

Do you communicate “I’m taking time out and will resume this conversation around X time”?

[@sakiko3492]

@@chillie000 Communicated that I need time to process, yes. I know that some people want to talk about a problem or issue right then and there. I don't like fighting when emotions are high. And that's where I seem to get into trouble a lot.

[@chillie000]

@@sakiko3492 it’s ok (infact necessary) to institute co-agreed upon rules of engagement around conflict. Eg the right to take time-out (but not as a manipulative or passive-aggressive delaying tactic etc as that would be controlling). Another excellent rule to consider is the right to enter the “Imago phase”. This was a technique developed by Harville Hendrix (he’s written a classic book on relationships). Basically the other person doesn’t get their turn to speak untill they have paraphrased back to you their understanding of what you just said. And vice-versa. POWERFUL stuff, but takes discipline. I firmly believe in investing heavily in conflict resolution skills / rules of engagement etc as let’s face it - emotions are fraught and conflict is rarely constructive as a result. We waste years of our lives in stupid Groundhog Day.

[@EdwardSanchezProductions]

This was a great discussion amber

[@feather151278]

Know yourself first. I know I am not comfortable with myself. I know I am not good at communicating. I know I am not good at intamacy. So I don't date. I don't put myself out there. I won't hurt another person. Simple.

[@millieb9450]

What happen with the show Comí g out for love on KZbin? Where can we watch the full episode?

[@ataradixon7756]

Great topic

[@ericahernandez3304]

I completely agree!

[@BusinessCazual]

That outfit looks so good on you

[@astelaalahmari3899]

Thanks girl I'm learning here upload more I miss u

[@WildOrsonNatureAdventures]

Omg!!! The stuck on one word. Like you are literally missing the important pieces of the convo. It feels like I have been fighting for this relationship for 5 years and now I just give up.

[@Lola-vq8en]

So true

[@Lola-vq8en]

Part 2 please

[@jdalex7412]

Dope ass art behind you, may i get a chance to know the artists behind them?

[@michelleb2570]

great video but only thing I would disagree with was lexi thing I feel it was too soon and she was hurt and felt betrayed as if ray cheated so I think enough time didn’t pass before they moved back in after that but just my opinion!

[@southernjustice615]

I'm 50 an most people still don't know how da act. When one can control there emotions, then one masters there mind😉

[@EdwardSanchezProductions]

Amber you are the best

[@docter_memory]

the negative impacts of acting defensively

[@sandimiller4234]

You are smart😊

[@keepitsimple9595]

Emotional intelligence .. alot of women are sensitive some more than others for diverse reasons childhood L's L's taken in relationships and L's in Life this tend to create fear panic and trigger traumas and intern they began to relate to their love interest in a toxic pesty unattractive way evey time a problem occur! During the dynamic of A relationship A total turn off counterproductive you want this but your doing that this is a NO! 👎 because aint nobody gone raise no grown ass woman! 💯 self accountability self healing have a relationship with self know thy self!

[@constanceperkins4474]

Men do the same thing to me. That’s why I’m single. 🤦🏾‍♀️🤷🏾‍♀️

[@sammierod2018]

What about if you’ve always wanted kids and you decide together that it’s not a good idea for your situation? I always imagined myself as a mother, but my girl has changed my opinion of having a child. We might adopt, but my perspective has definitely changed just from hearing other views.

[@Kiery112]

This show is a prime example of the problem with dysfunctional lesbian relationships, lack of focus, incessant selfishness, emotional immaturity, and faulty thinking.

[@Ruthblack99]

The problem with the show is that they find a bunch of broken people that have deep emotional trauma they should work on with professionals and throw them together in high stress environments for our entertainment. Don’t get me wrong, I watched the train wreck from beginning to end, so I am not above it. I also think that it will never end well when you try to ultimatum someone into making a serious commitment. That needs to be willingly made by both parties for it stand a chance to last.

[@bf9369]

All facts

[@AshleyLewisGrey]

🔥🔥🔥

[@vickimckenzie7247]

I think Mal and Zander showed a lot of maturity.😁🇦🇺

[@dialove222]

❤

[@iamqueenoftheworld]

Amber please I need your opinion on Sam love your content

[@kylaknight3655]

love

[@orbiii.niverse1392]

I ain’t ever dating another Virgo 😅 no offense Amber

[@irisjudea4971]

Suggested subject: How to cultivate emotional sobriety for yourself.

[@stephanieparker558]

How do you handle telling the truth and they don't accept it?

[@СапашЖумакадыров]

❤❤❤

[@brendamimms9282]

You need to reach out to Carly yashira. I think you could help her. She was in the relationship with Kassandra Lee.they split up and what you're talking on is kinda what she's going through. She's trying to find herself.

[@franciscaignacia8914]

🩵🦋🌺

[@claudiamoss7670]

Have you ever been in a polyamorous relationship, Amber?

[@HomemakerDaze]

Eh I hate gaslighting!

[@babygirlluvsyou]

Why you didn’t speak on Yoly? The Mal, Yoly and Xander situation was crazy intense and disrespectful.

[@СапашЖумакадыров]

Айлов

[@СапашЖумакадыров]

Отизенейм❤

[@EmiliaShikomba]

i think i am going to be lesbian single

[@chillie000]

What do you mean you’re ‘’made to feel guilty….’’ ? 3:16

[@michelleirenepedersen3294]

I think you should be careful with analyzing and talking about people like that, because it doesn't really make you look good. It's easy sitting back after the events, having the bigger picture and sound smarter than them. But it's very different when being in the situation as it all is happening. You easily loose the bigger picture and that is completely understandable. :)

[@joelmapp4501]

❤❤😍

[@ChloetheGaymer]

Aussie pronouns is Aussie.

[@AmbersCloset]

Just learning this, thank you

[@SamandEm]

Loved this video! Just a remind to double check people’s pronouns before you speak on them

[@AmbersCloset]

Yes I learned as I posted the video and will definitely correct before the next video🙏🏽

[@Charpoka_Official]

🇧🇩🇧🇩🇧🇩🇧🇩🇧🇩

[@alanaban1840]

U start at the wrong position / as good relationship is between man and woman / it is like trying to run but start with you hand

[@lucygraham9139]

Gaymen 🎉

[@dfuk66]

Its a no for me

[@BobbySchaffer]

you can still be yourself and marry a man.

[@geekgirrrl]

Let's see if I can meet another GenXQueer who is ok with not Ever living together.

[@grechellsiy7446]

you might need to date a therapist 😅

[@stephanieparker558]

Women are emotional creatures! OK let's be real. When you started talking i thought you was reading my mind! Girl!

[@mariap.9240]

The whole concept of the show is so stupid and toxic.

[@Twestliw]

Aussie and Mildred were the two biggest walking red flags I’ve ever seeen manifested in femme and masc energy. I’m glad everyone else agrees and they work on it.

[@alanetienne9397]

I AM 59 AND MARRIED. I WOULD NEVER DATE TODAY BECAUSE OF ABORTION LAWS AND FATAL POLY BS. BEST WISHES!

[@Grneyedspeciallady]

❤❤❤