Dating Profile Cringe

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[@JarvisJohnsonGOLD]

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[@devious_creature]

fire

[@christianmiller2960]

Best I’ve ever seen❤

[@kerobeep]

poooopo099

[@lillianjazed]

nice sponsor

[@Silverluckk]

jarvis gunnartv did this and i dont see u crediting him im confussed did u ACTUALLY steal this lol

[@cassandraburns9073]

My favorite definition of a himbo comes from, to my knowledge, Red from OSP, where she described them as "Hot of bod, pure of heart, and dumb of ass." To this day it still makes me smile when I'm feeling shitty lmao

[@theawooos3793]

That is a great definition!

[@Nebulousart]

pretty much! you can’t be a himbo if you aren’t strong, dumb, AND kind 😌

[@WestontheExistent]

OSP is great.

[@KingOfGaymes]

I love himbos, it all started when I was a child and got a crush on Hercules

[@Notcleverenough]

Him + Bimbo

[@elitate1609]

calling oneself a himbo immediately disqualifies them from actually being a himbo, they’ve gotta just have the vibe and perhaps a bit of golden retriever energy

[@fortunomancy]

calling yourself a himbo applies a level of self-awareness that a himbo should not have

[@KingOfGaymes]

@@fortunomancy exactly, a true himbo would never know they’re a himbo

[@talkingtreefrombugaboocree4847]

@@KingOfGaymes you’re so right lol

[@zombieedrea]

I'm going to disagree with this and point to Watcher when they did a video on top 5 himbos and their guest straight-up put himself on the list, and he did in fact have pretty big himbo energy. You can have self-awareness as a himbo. How long that self-awareness lasts is a different story.

[@HobieInTheBox]

I don't think that's entirely true. Being kind of dumb in an endearing way doesn't mean they don't have a level of self awareness

[@actionjackson3522]

"We are not trying to date any of you...." Well. I feel roasted.

[@RainyDays2790]

nah he said their standards are lower. he thinks we're too good for them. lol

[@actionjackson3522]

@@RainyDays2790 I feel somewhat better.

[@themagicknightress7132]

I think it’s a power balance issue. There has been a similar thing where a youtuber dated a young fan and took advantage of them

[@RainyDays2790]

@@themagicknightress7132 true, never date a fan. its a slippery slope. but also the joke was cute

[@SomeHarryGuy]

​@@RainyDays2790 Drew Gooden married a fan, I can date Jarvis

[@Narwhal5000]

I love how Jarvis always sounds slightly confused that his gold channel is.. free? It is free.

[@shirin9452]

He is waiting. But it continues to be free, despite his best efforts.

[@CharlieApples]

I’m also confused. How can such a bargain be possible in this day and age?

[@brookemetzger3313]

​@CharlieApples because youre premium

[@bhavloves]

I think it is a more philosophical question... is anything free?

[@phoenixfreefall]

Self-deprecation is a tough line... On one side, you can show that you're ok laughing at yourself and that's hot to me. On the other side, it seems like you're begging for someone to step in to become your self-esteem for you and that's not healthy.

[@manders8698]

💯

[@lorrainaroth5542]

Ayyyy YES

[@wildboar173]

it's usually the latter. "I dont take myself too seriously" is a healthier way of being. Self-deprecation is always negative.

[@jasperjazzie]

it's kind of like hyping yourself up in an equal but opposite way, where if you sell yourself too much you can seem self centered and arrogant, but there's levels to it, if you self deprecate in an obviously joking way it can be funny and relatable, but sometimes it's just awkward and depressing, or comes off as fishing for a compliment

[@breademojiwheatemoji4003]

i switched from making self-deprecating jokes to making jokes about how cool & awesome & attractive i am. on one hand, it has genuinely boosted my self-esteem. on the other hand, i think i have a bit too much of an ego now lol. take that as you will

[@elissa8284]

this premium 20 minute long roasting video is exactly what I needed rn, thank you mr Gold

[@icantthinkofaname8139]

First name Jarvis, middle name Johnson, last name Gold. How lucky to have a last name as golden as that!

[@SolaceMcfly]

The Mr. Gold is funny to me

[@me1ody69]

as long as it's free

[@UnkownWonders]

Only the most premium gold content

[@nicematerial]

Duh his surname is ☑️ as you can clearly see

[@fara16]

Jarvis is potentially the only person to be biased in favor of computer science majors lmaoo

[@aarishowton8037]

Nah same, my best partner so far was one so I’m definitely more interested when I see that lol

[@ositaiza888]

comp sci majors gotta stick together to survive

[@sovietbot6708]

All the best KZbinrs are nerds

[@mauli.]

we indians got a chance afterall 😭

[@vaishnavisingh9244]

@@mauli. not in india but definitely lol

[@Deriedits]

I hope Abigail finds her muppet partner 🧡

[@toasty_tonsty]

Am I a muppet???

[@noyanoamtal_music]

@@toasty_tonsty Or am I a man????

[@Bespeon]

Same! Abigail seemed cool

[@cass_sorrel]

i would have swiped right on Abigail. I'm currently dating a muppet, but am always interested in more muppet people in my life.

[@kamikazesrevenge]

@@toasty_tonsty LMAOOOOOOO

[@julianzacconievas]

Regarding the kids thing: I'm a dad of 2, always knew I wanted to be a dad. It's the best thing that has ever happened to me. It's most definitely not for everyone. Having the kids/no kids conversation early is good advice.

[@rebeccaabrams3079]

So much yes! Also timelines - not just IF you want children but WHEN. I was ready for kids at 20 and my partner wasn’t. It put a strain in our relationship for a bit because I felt like my desires weren’t being met, and he felt pressured. We settled on dogs for a few years and had our daughter at 23/24 which was when we BOTH felt completely confident and ready to move forward. Not saying our relationship would have been over had I known earlier he didn’t want kids that young, but it would’ve saved us both a lot of frustration and led to more productive talks vs fights about the topic.

[@LeafyGreenDA]

There's a surprising amount of people that love to try and change peoples' minds. It's a very strange situation to be in.

[@jessmtnz]

Same, fam. It's exhausting but rewarding. But if you didn't want them, idk when or if the reward will click for them.

[@jasperjazzie]

@@rebeccaabrams3079 also if you want bio kids i feel like it's something to talk about,,i'm open to having kids but i don't want to have any of my own, i want to adopt an older kid, also some people just can't have kids on their own, i know some people see adoption as a dealbreaker for some reason, so that should be part of the conversation

[@CharlieApples]

I agree! At the very least you should know what the other person wants kids-wise before you have (hetero) sex. Because an unplanned pregnancy could happen, and one person might not want that. It would be a terrible time to find out the other parent is staunchly anti-abortion and you don’t want kids. Normalize talking about the hard and fast consequences early on. Plan ahead, and plan well.

[@emmarie8844]

When jarvis said “sorry if I bite you I haven’t been in the U.S for long” I cackled because this actually happens in other countries 😭 in the Dominican Republic (where im from) mothers bite their kids to mess with them

[@quirkyblackenby]

What?!

[@lucilleballs2291]

that's so funny XD

[@NauticalTurtle]

Trueee

[@TheChellybean85]

Wait what da f?!!

[@braynm.6692]

Bro im dominican and my ma ain't do that shit 💀💀💀 Edit: She do pinch the F outta me tho lol

[@tundranone8366]

"I think if I met a person who would be a good parent, the picture would develop more in my brain." I just wanna take a moment to appreciate what a healthy strategy this is. So many people try to MAKE another person into a good parent, or get them to not want kids, or so many other scenarios where they're trying to change the other person to fit a long-standing ideal in their head. The quoted strategy leaves room for the other person to be whoever they are, and develop a life together that's equally one half each of their desires. I love that.

[@Thi-Sen]

I wholeheartedly agree

[@J_Lynn]

I think it's good to not want kids and know that, and to inform prospective partners of that. A lot of people are looking for kids when they look for a relationship. So for Jarvis to say it was an instant no to him is just this person's dating profile doing what it's supposed to. They're not a match and that's completely fine. It's not trying to force anyone to be something they are not.

[@tjfmd]

@@J_Lynn as someone who doesn't want kids (and even got sterilized to be sure it never happens) I agree with everything you said. I wouldn't want someone to try and convince me to have kids, and I would never try to convince someone that does want kids to not have them. For those that know 100% that they don't want kids it's worth it to mention it right away.

[@b4stard_sweet]

@@tjfmd ^^^^

[@evahagen9131]

I have to disagree. The decision to be a parent should come from YOU. How do YOU feel about children? And then you find a partner with the same dream. I think nobody should make that decision based on how good of a parent a partner "might" be (which is very hard to say anyway). What if one day you split up? Then you are a single parent anyway. I personally think it's healthier to make that decision individually.

[@souper.scooter]

"too many mirror pics" maybe they just really want you to know they aren't a vampire.

[@bufferkiller]

A study done on dating profiles a while back found that (cis straight) men prefer a picture of a woman looking directly in the camera for their first photo, and women preferred men looking away as their first photo. It's less threatening when looking away. I tested this for a month, like 8 years ago. Picture looking straight at the camera was my first, looking away was my second. I swiped right on everyone, and got a couple of matches. After a month I swapped the order of the first two pictures and went to sleep. I was working third shift at the time, so sleeping during the day. When I woke up I had over 100 matches. I am average looking at best, so the looking away photo was key for me. I did this test on Tinder, Bumble, and OKCupid. Hinge wasn't around yet or I would have tried it too.

[@bufferkiller]

I heard this first in Aziz Ansari’s book Modern Romance and then found some of the studies referenced. They were enlightening, to put it lightly. More effective than any “trick” fuckbois try to pull, and aren’t manipulative. Little tweaks to help present the best version of yourself, like someone suggesting you stand up straight or to iron your clothes.

[@kaitmarie6505]

Love that scientific method

[@bufferkiller]

@@kaitmarie6505 I’ve encouraged friends to try it too. None as extreme as I did, but showing the same results. I’m pan, though, and there is far less consistency in the queer community. While I am not a fan of the straight on stare, the men I’m attracted to are. The trans partners I’ve had have even less consistency. I kinda like the least consistent more. Increased the number of dates with people I wouldn’t have normally gone for, and some have shown me things I like that I didn’t know I liked. I’ve been monogamously partnered up for two years now, and neither of us are like each of our past partners. But we are both people that don’t need, and weren’t looking for a committed relationship. Just liked sharing new experiences with new people. Can you tell I’m autistic? 😆

[@Sophia_Sophisticated]

​@@bufferkillerread it all, didn't know you were autistic till the end! Very interesting experiment, feels like I learnt a bit about cis straight people, thank you!

[@isaiahromero9861]

thank you for this. I haven't touched a dating app in like 5 years because it destroys my already low self esteem, but I also think my profile kinda sucked lol, I was 19 tbf. I'll keep this in mind for when I finally try it again, even if it still doesn't work it's worth a shot

[@tierafraser3580]

Honestly it's so refreshing to hear other people say that you should have the kids conversation early. When I started dating my partner, we had the kids conversation super early. My family all acted like I was crazy for talking about kids so early. It's a huge relief to see that people are shifting their perspective over the years. I always thought it was so sad tohear that someone went through all that heartbreak of finding out a dealbreaker years into a relationship

[@tia2237]

Yeah! I've had convos with friends about this type of stuff before, and imo big talks like marriage/kids/etc. Should be first or second date discussions do that neither person is wasting each other's time

[@AZaqZaqProduction]

@@tia2237 First or second date? I'd put it right on the profile or at least discuss it within the first few messages.

[@tia2237]

@@AZaqZaqProduction oh yeah I'd definitely put it on my profile if possible. I'm just also very bad at social queues and taboos and seen way too many "you're a freak if you do X" videos that talk about mentioning huge life events too soon

[@DaNintendude]

I've had conversations with both an online group of friends, _and_ an irl group of friends. Both told me I was crazy for me saying I'd mention the kids thing early on. And it made me mad. I don't want to waste my time getting attached to someone who I'd ultimately break up with when we find out we disagree. I never want kids, and I will never change my mind. It's extremely important to me that I get that settled early.

[@tierafraser3580]

@@DaNintendude Yeah. My partner and I don't want to have kids but we're okay with adopting. I'm personally really really glad we had the conversation super early on Imo I think if you mention it early and the person you're dating thinks it's too soon you probably wouldn't vibe together anyway

[@probablyjaden]

I'm glad I still have years of innocence left to admire other people failing to date before I have to experience that too

[@666_cthulhu]

i’m acearo and not interested in dating but damn is it fun watching from the sidelines as my friends try to date 💀 they’re all like 16-20 so they’re still in the ‘awkwardly fumbling around in their romantic life cos they don’t really know what they’re doing’ stage lmao edit: oh and it’s even more fun when you know you’re not interested in romance or sex cos you can just laugh at the n0rmiEeZ!!1! and their strange non-platonic behaviors like an alien trying to understand human culture

[@annoyingkid48]

I’m just about aged out of that vibe, enjoy it while you can 😭

[@Garsnoos]

@@666_cthulhu as an aroace I can highly relate to this. Me and my friends are now close to being 30 so the dating is a little differentnow but it’s still interesting to see the downs and lows of their relationships

[@probablyjaden]

@@annoyingkid48 good luck 😭

[@probablyjaden]

@@666_cthulhu I'd consider myself acearo too and I rather stay that way as long as I can and just hope my shitty brain doesnt pull a shitty brain moment on me and make me like people romantically or sexually. but yeah it is really fun!

[@benmatthews7316]

Why does it always feel like I should be ashamed and judged after that second “it’s free” for accepting this premium content without payment.

[@bootscooty]

He's getting mad money from these videos

[@lisahoshowsky4251]

“Our standards are uh…a little bit lower” 💀 Same tho

[@Kayla_P99]

My thing with self depreciation is that I don't want to have to prove you wrong to yourself, that's exhausting. Basically I've been around enough people that use that as a way to fish for compliments and support. I'm much more able to support people when they have the self awareness to ask for it rather than put the burden of them caring for themselves on me.

[@basilholst9262]

you're right and you should say it

[@jasperjazzie]

it's weird bc like...i think ppl should have someone to prove them wrong to themselves and have a support system and all that, but also when u do this you're like...holding people hostage into doing it, when it should be something they want to do because they genuinely like you i feel bad for people like that,,as someone who has been in that exact situation, i don't think they're burdens or bad people or whatever the fuck else but like...cmon guys there are better ways of doing this

[@Kayla_P99]

@jasperjazzie in my experience self depreciation acts as a short cut that doesn't allow for actual vulnerability that is required for an effective support network. Love is the mortifying ordeal of being known, especially the scary to share parts.

[@DiMagnolia]

Yeah I think it’s fine sprinkled in lightly but when it’s someone’s entire personality I’m like okay buddy maybe you need to go to therapy haha

[@TheMaskedHero]

Looking forward to 2025 when Jarvis is invited to a wedding of someone whose profile was in this and a viewer saw it and was like "yes, please!"

[@brkh96]

That would be adorable

[@swagromancer]

Already trying to track down Abigail in another tab, fingers crossed.

[@SaiHedghog]

I started having so much anxiety about my profile showing up, that I almost regretted sending my profile in 😭 anyways very good video!!

[@commandercorl1544]

What Wes means by poly but single is that he isn't taken at the moment, but he'd prefer (or wouldn't mind) a polyamorous relationship. The other part about being poly and a hoe is probably just a joke, a lot of queer people joke about ourselves like that.

[@demo2823]

They weren't bothered by the poly but single. They were bothered by how they were equating poly and being a hoe. It's pandering to the stereotype.

[@myownbravado]

@@demo2823I don’t know if it’s pandering, that feels like it has a negative connotation. I think making a joke about while simultaneously shutting down a stereotype isn’t a bad way to address it. Unless I’m misinterpreting your reply in which case, my bad

[@jasperjazzie]

@@demo2823 literally how, they're making a joke about themselves and themselves only

[@sarahbearbabygirl]

5:34 sam going “I got that DAWG in me! woofoofoof” made me burst out laughing

[@samml3566]

took my 4 yr old to the pediatrician today because shes been throwing up since sunday. She has been lethargic all day, but you bet your ass she pulled out her kermit impression for everyone there. glad to see shes not the only one lmao.

[@chongyunmain]

hope she's feeling better now!

[@samml3566]

@@chongyunmain aww thank you I really appreciate that!

[@quirkyblackenby]

Half the reason I’m on dating apps is to see what people have to say about themselves honestly so this video is right up my alley. Also nonbinary people’s profiles are always the most unhinged which I love

[@bellac6311]

nah nah i absolutely ADORE enby profiles, no joke itll be like Sock (they/them) *You can find me:* chanting the bee movie script over a sacrifical bonfire in the woods *I'm looking for:* a fellow raccoon spirit to hide in the trash cams and hiss at pedestrians w/ me *My biggest red flag:* this one *inserts picture of a large flag thats red*

[@PickledThyme1]

@@bellac6311 Ngl that has appeal

[@bellac6311]

@@PickledThyme1no but like fr lmao like theyre always such a vibe

[@mellow_mallow]

​@@bellac6311 it's wild because i genuinely have a friend named Sock 😭

[@olivercharles2930]

Being unhinged is kind of the requirement for being nonbinary, no offense.

[@thegirlfromvenuss]

The Naruto exchange is why they call it gold 😅

[@jotapecavalcante3819]

when they had a 2 minute exchange about Naruto and thought that ninja meant the streamer 🤣

[@aarishowton8037]

As a single member of the poly community lemme just say I am absolutely resonating with Wes aka Bartholomew

[@cabinonfire6365]

As another member of the poly community. I agree.

[@jessjess23brooks89]

Wes is cooler than most of us will ever be. I'm not poly, but admiring respectfully.

[@tia2237]

I'm on the line of poly(ambiamorous) and SAMEEE

[@digitalharmony26]

100% relate.

[@snomberry]

Bro I want him so bad

[@NickBeanDrums]

This is platinum content - I appreciate the humor and the roasts, but also the personal introspection and vulnerability from Jarvis and Sam. Understanding that you're only a human being and that we all have little quirks and insecurities is really important. It's such a charming video, hope Sam comes around more often!

[@INeyxI]

No the content is gold didn't you see the Intro?🤷‍♂️ It's ... It.. It is Gold. Agree with the rest!

[@stinethequeen4683]

jarvis’s hair looks so good in this video

[@radiclelife]

Yes! Seems like he’s using new product(s) and it looks great!

[@demo2823]

He FLUFFY

[@heylol_.]

frfr

[@sampuffer8099]

Jarvis IS stealing our content? What's next, finding out Jarvis Johnson Gold isn't free?!

[@luciflemme]

About the selfies/mirror selfies etc. I WANT more candid/natural pictures of me, but my friends are not picture takers :( I'm the friend that takes pictures, and I actually have taken a lot of pictures that are on my friends' dating profiles. Don't hold it against us if it's mostly selfies, sometimes our only options are this or blurry backlit pictures taken by our parents :(

[@demo2823]

Set up a camera while you work at home, out it on video, and every noe amd then look up at it and smile. Then catch a frame from the video. Made me look like I have more friends taking pictures than I do.

[@TheNinjapancake14]

I make strangers take my photos if my friends and family refuse

[@luciflemme]

@@demo2823 This is unhinged and I love it

[@4minutesleftx]

I think y'all might be giving that person too much credit. I think it is just thay they're obviously taller than average person and want to showcase that.

[@user-qs9zt1qy6n]

Sam was excellent in this! You should have her on again, and on the podcast.

[@spicyseliph]

Why? so “she” can recruit more people to the tran agenda?

[@samisugarcube]

I love being a Sam

[@darkithnamgedrf9495]

She was on the patreon podcast

[@silkwesir1444]

But she said she's bothered by self-deprecating humor... Huge red flag!

[@katesszz]

@@silkwesir1444 in a dating profile its a little cringe. Its like begging for a "noooo you're not dumb your smart" compliment

[@mikusheadphones]

Kara and Wes are both my type in the most opposite ways lmao honestly these all were good profiles, shoutout to y'all who put yourself out there1

[@Julia-tk2em]

Christ, my dyslexic ass read that as “Kanye West is my type”.

[@oo4758]

@@Julia-tk2em Bro, shit like that is why I love(&hate) my dyslexia sm 💀💀

[@frognamedjog]

​@@Julia-tk2em I read it as Kanye West too (dyslexic and high)

[@Jenna-zd9od]

The Polyam community is not gunna be mad at the himbo self tag, one of the core books for the community is called Ethical Slut

[@CommunalPissRug]

Will and Wes feel like green flags for me, I wish them well

[@christiebreeechelon]

Jarvis, have a kid. I'm pregnant and I'd like to battle our children like pokemon.

[@montialarson]

Good video. My thing with kids is I don't want biological children because I have a crap ton of physical and mental diseases and disabilities that are hereditary. However I would like to be a foster parent and potentially adopt a child and or a teenager or multiple kids and or teens.

[@paadoxal]

that sounds great:) hope it works out in the future

[@brkh96]

I'm sorry to hear about your health but glad to see you being positive and exploring alternatives. Good luck to you!

[@alspace4925]

Then don’t even bother if u can’t help ur self what makes u think u can with a kid

[@paadoxal]

@@alspace4925 maybe don't be rude and unreasonably ableistic for no reason? disabled people can raise kids just fine

[@olivercharles2930]

@@paadoxal Can they though?

[@fishfresh4538]

If those two can't find a date on dating apps then I am truly fucked

[@Taruni-Shravanti9693]

These profiles are why kahma io is doing AI headshots instead

[@user-yo5yr9yr2h]

I put the "do not want children" front and center for the reasons you mentioned. I don't want to get deep into a relationship or feelings only to have to break up with someone because we got different goals. It's unfortunate but I'd rather someone swipe left on my profile seeing that we aren't compatible fundamentally.

[@stellarae8257]

Why was it so shocking to me that Jarvis thinks he wants kids? lmao. Maybe I’m just used to myself and most the people around me not wanting kids? I think I expect people around our age to just not want them so I’m always a bit surprised when they do haha

[@paadoxal]

hm interesting, i come from a slavic country and all my girl friends want kids bc it's honestly kind of socially important here

[@kaepiper]

i’m only 18 but yea i get you, i forget not everyone feels the way i do 😭😭😭

[@Garsnoos]

Yes, same! It somehow shocks me that there are people out there who want kids lol. I can’t even imagine it, I don’t like kids that much 😅

[@brkh96]

@@Garsnoos I like kids but don't want them with our world currently being the way it is (smh)

[@jessicabibbles]

I think he would be a good dad.

[@devons.3481]

regarding the ethical non-monogamy thing: i've personally identified as polyamorous for several years now, and imo the term "ethical non-monogamy" (or ENM) is largely a response to the phenomenon of people having a lot of partners and not being honest about that with said partners, or people cheating in monogamous relationships and calling it polyamory, or people coercing partners into "open relationship" type situations just bc one person really wants to have multiple partners, even if the other partner is much more into monogamy. people (especially those cheating and looking for excuses) will sometimes call these situations "polyamory," when in fact polyamory refers to a consensual, honest situation. hence, the distinction of **ethical** non-monogamy, meaning everybody involved is into it, everybody involved is open and honest, and everybody involved is aware of all the complex dynamics which may ensue.

[@DiMagnolia]

I see that point but I always view ENM as more of an umbrella term for all forms, whereas polyamory is a bit more specific, although it in itself is an umbrella term too.

[@tardybloomer]

Sam going “i got that dog in me” and barking had me laughing for 5 whole minutes

[@felisazure1820]

17:15 As someone who is poly myself, I totally get the concern due to stereotypes, but I think it was pretty clear in the bio they were joking around, so. If it empowers someone they should go for it! Of course though, don't casually call someone that without making sure they are comfortable with it first (though that's kind of a given). I appreciated all the positive energy in this video, you two weren't judgemental, just gave some really good critiques and compliments!

[@RealGraySkyMusic]

Super proud of you in CC my dude!

[@madisonnew9613]

Honestly Jarvis, super proud, so glad to see you at CC

[@chocoholicc]

CC? whats that

[@akshaynathan4604]

​@@chocoholicc Creator Clash I think?

[@ackok]

He's the only reason I watched 👏🏼👏🏼

[@JhericFury]

I still do the goofy smile thing. It's a combo of insecurity and "what am I meant to do with my face? What does a smile look like again?"

[@derekhasabrain]

When people say “Im more likely to swipe right if they have pictures either with friends or they have pictures their friends took of them” I DO NOT HAVE FRIENDS THAT I HANG OUT WITH WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO FOR YOU TO LIKE ME THEN

[@WitchySenpai]

I think the not having any friends you hang out with may be off putting to potential dates.

[@derekhasabrain]

@@WitchySenpai yeah I get that, I just don’t think that it’s fair to be put off by that. I’m certainly not for everyone but just because I don’t get out often doesn’t mean I’m unfriendly or unfunny. I’m socially anxious and also non-confrontational so I tend to just slip away from friendships if they’re toxic, and unfortunately I haven’t known many non-toxic people. Idk I guess I’m just coping hard 😭

[@nari5161]

Don't worry, introverts will not necessarily see that as a bad thing. rating profiles is fun but not to be taken too seriously bc one person's 5 is another person's 9; it's about compatibility

[@queencleopatra007]

​@Drew Lester-Nieves 💗💛 i don't think it's a matter of thinking you will be unfriendly...more so, its probably the worry that you will be clingy because you won't have a social life outside of your partner. I'm not saying you specifically are clingy, just that that's probably the concern.

[@beautybard]

A big part of HIMBO is that he's also goofy and kind. Think Kronk.

[@zarriaortega4547]

So excited for this, this is the sweet, sweet premium content that we subscribe for

[@Fluff_Noodles]

Jarvis's curls are so defined!! His hair is looking healthy and gorgeous 💕

[@thischannelisdead9]

I would be best friends with Abigail if we met. MUPPETS? MCR? MOTHER MOTHER? COOL HAIR + CLOTHES? ART SCHOOL? Absolutely. Edit: I'm 15 so not actually that would be weird but if we met AND I was 22

[@froggy5748]

Tbh it’s not TOO weird for people with age gaps to be friends, I have a group of five friends where we all met playing a game together and our ages range from 16 to 25. Older people wanting to be friends with teens specifically would be 100% weird but if they are connected with mutual friends then it’s not super strange to meet in a group setting

[@thischannelisdead9]

@@froggy5748 Yeah I mean friends is fine I'm friends with people older than me, but BEST friends with someone in a completely different life stage to me? We'd have to spend A LOT of time together, and that can lead to a lot of scary situations with the wrong people when they're 5+ years older than me.

[@froggy5748]

@@thischannelisdead9 yeah 100%, even the 16 year old and 25 year old in my friend group don’t talk outside of the gc and aren’t super close. Definitely can be friends but it’s weird if they’re inseparable best friends unless they were literally raised together.

[@TanjaTHEAwesome]

11:29 omg, this person is so awesome and love their style! I mean I'm not picky about mirror pics but also most smart phones have a timer so you can set it up and take more natural looking outfit photos but for me that's just a tiny detail and they look like someone I'd hang out with.

[@tylerwhite1322]

This is such a good point. Unless it's a group photo, no one ever takes photos of me so I have to take them myself for dating apps and instead doing all selfies or mirror pics, I like to use the timer so my photos look a little more dynamic.

[@indypence5740]

thank you 😭😭

[@lillianmcevoy9014]

In the most respectful way- y’all are making me live the bisexual dream you’re both so beautiful and fun! Don’t change for any dummy on a dating app!

[@IHateBitchesButImNotGay]

🤢🤮

[@DiMagnolia]

Me toooooooooo they’re both gorgeous and fun

[@louloudaki_]

“a manly muppet looking for a muppet of a man” is honestly a banger line also the “down for most crime, but preferably treason” is hilarious

[@thegirlfromvenuss]

The only time you wish you're not chosen for a KZbin video 💀

[@Adrian3993]

I'm a poly person, and i constantly call myself a hoe. It's really up to the person some poly people find it hurtful and some don't.

[@stitchfinger7678]

but i feel like, reclamation or not, nobody should *assume* you're okay being called a word thats normally an insult and even its a word you use self-referentially, people could still be intending it as an insult

[@olivercharles2930]

I mean, fucking multiple people is kind of the definition of hoe behaviour.

[@softiejace]

i got into an argument w a friend once who thought that the line "would love to hug someone besides my blåhaj" was uncomfortably self-deprecating when i just wanted to signal to people that i have a blåhaj

[@DylanPackard]

I will say, I think a big part of people not liking random candid/out-and-about pics of themselves from other people typically boils down to those people just not 100% knowing how to take a "good" picture I know my wife at the very least was super self conscious cause a lot of phone cams don't do nearly a good enough job sometimes, and after I started doing photography again with some halfway decent lenses she was so much more comfortable. Not just the quality but the quantity of shots, her family never really took many pics of the kids so I was sort of the first person to take snaps. Just a random thought halfway through the vid sorry for the rambling haha

[@omnicatalyst]

I love how polite roasting morphed in to just advice and wholesome energy XD

[@rabbit6546]

Diversity of type of photo is always my reason why I don’t do dating profiles because as a trans person I absolutely cannot handle other ppl having control of what I’ll look like in an image, and I’ve heard that group photos aren’t always a good idea for dating profiles so all of the pictures of me taken by someone else are me *with* someone else LOL

[@BearJoyner00]

I don't leave the house and have friends to go out with and take photos of me. I am on dating apps partially because I want someone to give me a reason to actually leave my house.

[@demo2823]

Tips from somebody who didn't have friends until I went on a dating app: 1) Your garden or a park can look like a hike. Prop up phone, do timer, take jump photo. 2) Set up camera on video where you are working, arting or eating. Glance at it and smile every now and then. Screengrab. 3) Selfies with dogs!

[@God_Of_Iuck]

The most premium channel to ever exist

[@josefinebliss2801]

I remember a guy I came across on tinder once who's entire profile was feeling sorry for himself. He'd written about how he's given up on love because everyone hurts him but here he is for some reason still giving it a go blahblahblah... Then some sad meme photo too about depression... That sort of thing is a massive red flag for me because I immadiately dislike anyone who claims all their exes are idiots who intentionally hurt their feelings. That to me reads that the guy either is a manipulator who drives the women he dates insane and then he makes himself out to be the victim, or he loves drama and only goes out with women who clearly aren't on the same page as him. Most likely it's either way a person who loves drama and feeling like a victim and he'll want a woman who constantly reassures him and whom he can use as an emotional tissue. It's just not attractive in the slightest to go on a dating site of any kind and then write a full profile only about how sorry you feel for yourself. I don't understand those people, it's like they WANT to be rejected so they can stay a victim lmao. There's a time and place to bring up negative experiences and it is NOT on your dating profile...

[@kaw8473]

I'm here to lovingly roast my husband's dating profile. It was one, single block of text, with spelling errors and with very little grammar. In the middle of the block it stated "if you can't hold a decent conversation, don't message me." LMAO I'm proof it worked, happily married 6 years now.

[@apostrophe.t]

Wes just oozes confidence, and I dig it. Get it, bb!

[@HobieInTheBox]

Non monogamous is what it says. If monogamous means a relationship with 1 person, non-m means the opposite: relationship with more than 1. It's not tied down to just hook ups.

[@childofthelordkingofkings1904]

You guys said you’d be roasting everyone’s profiles but you’re mostly being so nice 😂 great vid!

[@septiceye_3706]

This was incredibly entertaining!! Please bring Sam back for a Part 2, that'd be really cool!!

[@basilholst9262]

"you are not safe from the selfie obscuring your face" Dude I'm really not that is my ex what an unexpected jumpscare

[@basilholst9262]

my ex who made sure to tell me they didn't like "most of the shit I watch"

[@TheKatiecat68]

can I just say! I don't know who does the captions on your videos, if you do them yourself or whatnot, but I appreciate them so much. they are very accurate and well-timed and they really help me focus on the video!

[@jadestanton5581]

“Window shopping” lmao

[@thisaintitdawg8759]

Jarvis’s pure and genuine disappointment at 20:51 💀💀💀

[@Chikadulce10]

I get the diversity of photos maybe being important for some folks. But I personally rarely ask people to take photos of me irl. I hang out with people sometimes and we don't usually take pics. I have some selfies, but I don't take them regularly. Only when I feel extremely confident or that I look particularly good that day. So what does that say about me? I still think I'm a pretty decent person xD

[@kimiko11150616]

Please do another one of these. I really enjoyed this video.

[@cosmicwhalefall]

I was gonna make a joke about people saying you want to date Sam because you are existing the same space as a fEmAlE but I see people have already done that... not as a joke.......... completely unironically. Please be normal to Jarvis, guys.

[@justAnotherDayVibin]

I very much enjoy the transitions into the sponsored content. On all your content in general, keeps it enjoyable

[@tameraivy]

Thank you for being the thing I come home from school to

[@kenneth1997]

Your profile is premium, Jarvis.

[@brittballsVLOGS]

Man I love her so much, so fun seeing her pop up more lately in my seemingly endless auto play of KZbin videos throughout the day💛

[@SamwitchOfficial]

Brittballs my love

[@natmcartes]

please do another one of these, it was great

[@alltheworldatmyfeet]

theres something i absolutely adore about respectfully judging others dating profiles.

[@bad_bau]

Ethical non-monogamy means consensually having multiple partners, whether sexual or romantic. It's not for everyone, but neither is monogamy which is the point. It requires a lot of communication and solid boundaries, but there are many examples of highly healthy non-monogamous relationships, just as there are many examples of extremely toxic monogamous relationships. I am a non-monogamous person, and to me, his use of the word "hoe" is more along the lines of reclamation. Not every non-monogamous person is okay with that language being used for them, and, in general, I don't think monogamous people should be calling non-monogamous people hoes, but I also find it empowering to use that sort of language about myself. At the end of the day, there's nothing wrong with being a hoe or a slut as long as everything is consensual and safe, so taking power away from people who use it in a derogatory by using it in a neutral or even positive way is really meaningful.

[@suemccashland]

im not a ho because im poly; im poly because i am a ho XD

[@commandercorl1544]

Yes! I'm glad they're concerned for the queer community, but for a lot of us, insulting ourselves is a part of pride and reclamation.

[@Olivia_1100]

Please do a part 2, this was great

[@phire0]

You guys should make more videos together, I love the energy!

[@drguthrie7621]

Tough thing about dating profiles for me is I just don't take that many pictures in general so I mainly have weird selfies I took specifically for the app lmao

[@christianantony2107]

i want more trio episodes with sam jordan and jarvis. yall just work so well together-- I remember sam from the one dhar mann bingo episode a while ago... she cool

[@zest761]

I lost one of my raycon buds and was waiting for a KZbinr to have a sponsor to order another one so hell yeah

[@hhhpestock951]

"will haunt your nightmares in a cute way"

[@deriendarling]

The kids thing is so important and I'm glad there's a lot of apps that let you put it on your profile from the get go. I sometimes get liked by people that have in their profile that they want kinds and I'm like.. so you didn't read mine huh? Like that's not something you can compromise on..

[@-Nixie_Nya-]

This premium channel is the only thing that makes me happy

[@talia744]

pls do another one of these!!! i loved this one

[@djfunnydog420]

I can’t believe you got someone on who doesn’t know what a himbo or monogamy is on your dating app video..

[@michaell8269]

Always swiping right on Jarvis.

[@tmnt_vc6775]

Your fit looks so good in this video as always your fits slap. I also think your hair looks really nice and healthy too

[@uydagcusdgfughfgsfggsifg753]

This was beautiful, please do a sequel for the love of god

[@ashlynbrooke2108]

i've literally matched w one of the people and idk how, like i live in the middle of nowhere in the south

[@ardosplays3584]

just for you and your friend but a perfect example of a himbo is kronk from The emperor's new groove and also Kronk's New Groove or the show but if you know him you get it xDDD

[@sosSmiley]

I really enjoy your guys` chemistry Its awesome to watch it Would love for Sam to come back

[@SaraxAdam]

this has been my favorite collaborator of yours besides Jordan!! Sam was sick

[@adnamafett7862]

I get so much serotonin from the “gooooooold” in the intro