Did I Learn From Transition?

[@tieiatalks]

I’m noticing a change in the pitch in your voice. It’s not as deep as it used to be. No matter what, your voice is beautiful. I really enjoy these videos!

[@atrapforfools]

I noticed that too, thought it was just me.

[@paulalavery4515]

@@atrapforfools Same thing its becoming much more feminine : )))

[@Bowdon]

@@paulalavery4515 I wouldnt say all women have higher pitched voices.. some have deeper voices often described as husky.

[@denimjumpsuit]

i recently made the ultimate decision to stop taking testosterone, because it's causing seizures. it's forced me into having a different relationship with my body as a trans man who never thought they'd stop taking hormones. i've made a commitment to love my body no matter what it goes through or looks like. it was really nice to hear this perspective

[@janesmith8050]

Sending you support and a wish for your good health.

[@madamedestcroix]

I'm really glad that you're working on being kind to your body but really alarmed that you were having seizures on testosterone. Please consider making a report with RxSK an independent organisation that is collecting personal reports on effects of cross sex hormones (the good, bad and strange) rxisk.org/transgender-meds-a-call-for-reports/

[@dumpstercub2902]

I’m really glad you’re learning to cope without t and love your body but I’m concerned about the whole seizures thing. Have you sought medical attention? This is either a really serious side effect of testosterone or something going on with your body that sounds like a really serious issue.

[@denimjumpsuit]

@@dumpstercub2902 yes, i've talked to different medical professionals and it's recommended that i stop taking T. seizures do run in my family but i never started having seizures until i started taking hormones. my mother didn't started having seizures until her hormones were effected. epilepsy is very complicated. i just very recently decided to stop taking testosterone, it hasn't been long enough for me to say it's actually making them stop. the seizures i were having were not every often.

[@dumpstercub2902]

a kreimendahl Ok, I’m glad they weren’t frequent and I hope this works out for you

[@arielamato6169]

Elle! You can’t just give us 5 minutes 😭 lol we need more of you !

[@xbassausagex]

Your words are really helping me evaluate myself on a deeper level. I’ve been out as trans for a year and have been living as male socially for about as long. My parents and I are looking into hormones but ofc the quarantine is making it difficult. I’m glad I was able to take this time to become more confident in my choice and really explore myself mentally and spiritually. What you said about one’s voice actually was very comforting to hear, as my voice was one of the biggest causes of my discomfort. It took this thinking to realize what I was truly uncomfortable about. Another thing is, it’s really easy to see all these people online talking about what they were dysphoric about, and unconsciously pick those up. It’s important to have voices like yours heard. Before I looked inside, I would tell you I just wanted to be male and present as such, I didn’t like my body, etc. (which is untrue) And recently I feel that I have no disdain for my body, it’s healthy and strong and every part of it allows me to do what I want to do every day. I am still male, but I have a greater appreciation for my body and I’m going to approach my transition more cautiously. While I am in distress over the disconnect, I can take a walk outside or ride my bike in the hills. It’s not the biggest thing in my life, not even close. Yes it’s painful, but I’m not going to let it rule my life whatsoever.

[@soup4dasoul253]

Honey bun, 1. You're such a blessing 2. Your spirit is so loving, strong, and rare. You're truly a gift to this earth and literally saving and changing lives 3. You honestly look like a cute girl next door. I'd never confuse you for a man. Voice sounds fine to me. My aunt has a very manly voice chica. 4. I truly love your journey and outlook on life👏🙌

[@carolbechtel6492]

Wow, even though, I can’t pretend to understand the confusion you had as a child, a young person, a teenager, and now as a young adult goes thru when there are gender questions? While listening to your video’s story and journey it is certainly has been an eye opener. I can only imagine having the mind at war with what one feels and then with what one see’s in the mirror can only cause more pain and confusion. I want to thank you for sharing and explaining your journey, your story.. You are emotionally strong and beautiful human being. Continue to be strong and follow your dreams, most of all congratulations on becoming a college graduate....

[@susanvaughan4210]

Your life experiences have caused you to develop wisdom and self knowledge beyond your years. Thank you for sharing this.

[@Moni623]

It sounded crazy, but one of your videos appeared in my recommendations one night that I could not sleep due to an anxiety attack and the very genuine way you express yourself helped me calm down a bit. So thanks for that. You have a subscriber from across the ocean ready to support you :)

[@sassygranny8450]

For ten years I also thought I was transgender, later I found out that I'm traumatized by things from my youth, I acted masculine because it was my shield. Then I met my boyfriend two years ago and he made me feel feminine again, he always tells me how he likes my hips, breasts, hooded eyes without doing me wrong. I started to like myself again and started to wear female clothes again, used make up, and bought some bra's. It was a interesting journey but I found myself again and that's great.

[@lmaohaver7403]

Congrats!

[@trishsoha]

The one KZbinr I stop everything else to watch. Proportion of Elle to Reality is 1:1.

[@aiyahC]

Elle, I am neither trans or detrans, but I love your insight and honesty. I stumbled across you maybe a month ago. this video held so much that I needed to hear as someone with severe mental health problems on disability struggling with trauma and finding it hard to know and love who I am right now Thank you.

[@Cecilia-fc3sg]

Even this 66yr old grandma is learning from you. Wise young woman you are.

[@simplydanlrene4276]

You have come a long way on self reflection. I enjoy hearing you tell what is going on with you. I see so many and watch a lot of these who are de-transitioning and wanted to know why. Some who were FTM have said because they got caught up in all the hype of it when it really started to grow, some said they wanted to be male because they thought they would be safe from assault or rape, some have said they thought they were the other sex but realized they were not. It must be so hard to go through all that. Keep working on you. :)

[@JimmiAlli]

I always feel that the body is the carriage of the soul only. So there is really no need to change it.

[@kerriannechilders]

Or we should just not look at change as negative. And maybe look at our bodies as a home. Some people need more change to feel at home than others. For me personally, I couldn’t just “accept that”. I need to make changes to feel happy. If I couldn’t change anything I wouldn’t be alive.

[@kerriannechilders]

Kiki M. Trans is an adjective not a noun. We aren’t different type of people. We just happen to be trans in the same way people happen to be blonde or happen to be 5’8”. It just happens to some of us. We’re all just people.

[@notsorry3631]

You really are such a beautiful person, inside and out.

[@ewy3998]

I just find myself listening to you before sleep (it helps me with my insomnia). Its a compliment. Subscribed.

[@maggiegresham537]

The way you explained your voice as much more of just a sound 👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏 Yassssss!!!!!

[@Bowdon]

I am so happy that you are being you. It sounds like you are spiritually connected to a higher plane and understand that our bodies are only really a vessal that we travel in. Being ourselves and not a follower can be the most difficult thing we all face. I think the lessons you have learned should be applied to everyone. Be yourself and love yourself.

[@bloompretty7576]

You are so wise and so strong to have gotten through your body dysmorphia. It is one of the sadder things for people to feel their body is wrong whether they feel they are actually an alien or a cat or the wrong gender or the wrong skin color or any of that and that they need to drastically change their bodies in order to be who they really are. You don't need to change yourself to be who really are its like you said "You don't have to change things about yourself to feel like you can move through the world better." also as you said like your body is just your body its your thing to help you get through the experience of life who cares what sex/gender/race/etc you have/are that doesn't change who you are. All of it is good and great and you should celebrate yourself after all no one else in the entire world will ever be quite like you.

[@Bahiyyih4]

I'm glad you get out in nature! A natural tonic for everyone! It is sad that some people don't have the time or opportunity to enjoy nature. I even heard of someone saying "No homo, but the sunset is really pretty today"

[@pollyanna6863]

I remember when getting a nose job was never an option until age 18, and breast enlargement was laughed at. Now all of a sudden, surgery is supposed to fix all self-doubt. Must have something to do with profit motive and misogyny. These days, everything is about surface fixes. Where is the love?

[@MoonLight-zw2ej]

When I was thinking about going F to M , because a lot of things was happening in my mind and my life, one friend of mine just told me; "it doesn't matter how you look outside as long as you love yourself from inside and have people that love you for who you are" and I just thought "fuck it , you're right" then I started to love myself, regardless of what my sexual orientation is. It was just that simple to me, although I know it's different for everyone, I'm just telling my experience. pd; sorry if I write something wrong, English is not my mother language

[@meimimiyasaki]

I passed though my puberty with low levels of testosterone, somehow, from my neck up, so my voice didn't change so much since my 10 years sold. I'm now a 27yo male, I identify myself as non binary, but it doesn't change the fact that people very often think I'm a female because of my voice. I struggled for years because of that, but it have been about 3 years since I came across the fact that my voice is just a voice and it's tone doesn't even matter, what people's gonna think doesn't matter and it my foice actually was never a problem to me, people said it was a problem and I believed. Thank lord I got more mature and realized that I have a unique voice and I like it very much. I agree with you very much, Elle, we are the ones who need to like and love ourselves the way we organically are, even tho it's okay to make changes, we need to understand our uniqueness and make it a good thing about ourselves. Well, personally I really like your voice, it is really pretty and, pardon me, kinda sexy. You're a beautiful being, and I'm loving learning more about your personal journey! Much love from Brazil. ♥

[@Carol-Bell]

I think most of what you said amounts to “focus”. It’s unhealthy to focus on negatives, on the body, face, voice, etc, - much better to focus on other people, the good you can do or enjoy. And the “who” you are is way more important than the “what” you are. It’s very common not to like your voice once you hear it. Everybody has things they don’t like about their body- hair, waistline, muscles (or lack), height, etc- and it’s what keeps plastic surgeons in business:) But WHO you are is most important and as many find out even after weight loss or plastic surgery, the WHO you are doesn’t change. Wise words, Elle!

[@lisajohnson8566]

This was by far your absolute best video. As a MtF that did this surgically 30 years ago your comments here are spot on!! I'm intrigued by your voice as I sound the same way. Of the things you can't change the voice is it. At this point it doesn't matter if I'm called sir or he. I look the part and it's the voice that is the first givaway. Good luck to you and your bravery and I hope your have all the success in life your want and deserve. BTW you're very beautiful and we both can sound very feminine when we try. 😊👍

[@jenniferwilson9129]

I love your attitude 🥰. You have beautiful eyes, too! 😊

[@BruceLee-mo4pn]

You are BEAUTIFUL. The person you are is Beautiful. You are a very strong and brave person. I can not make videos of myself, my personal life. I thank you for letting me get to know you. I thank you for sharing your experiences with people that maybe would have made a mistake in their life and because you shared your life experiences they maybe realized that they need to wait. Thank you.

[@saramari1957]

so insightful and wise. thank you for being vulnerable, in five minutes you have taught us all so much ❤️

[@wordlessASMR]

This video contains some very wise insights for people from ALL walks of life. Thanks for the grounding message. Also, I like the shorter format sometimes. Short and sweet :)

[@hreedwork]

So much change (spiritual, attitude, outlook) in such a short amount of time. Great message for everyone. Bravo! 😎

[@withthemostcake]

I enjoy Everytime you share! It’s so genuine and real! Much appreciated! I know you are helping so many more than you know!

[@lindadelacy9516]

You are wise beyond your years, Elle! How's school going? you said you had some finals in an earlier video... I hope you consider psychiatry or a related field, because you really have a great way of explaining these issues that you grapple with! You've probably already helped a lot of people!

[@martinkroeker1941]

Five minutes to soothe the soul and recalibrate the mind. Thank you for taking the time to record this while you are probably still very busy.

[@isabella7195]

Hi Elle, I love this video, your perspective is so enlightening and refreshing.. The body is the vessel of the soul and we get so wrapped up in what it looks like! Myself included. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us I am so glad you exist in this world! 🦋🤍

[@MrSloqwerty]

Power to you! Loving oneself is really hard and is a continuous journey. I am glad you're recognizing some of the many positive qualities/traits you possess. By the way, your eyes are absolutely gorgeous!

[@lapis3834]

At such a young age, you have figured out what so many spend so long to figure out. Think your journey in the end was worth it .How much you have grown and how wise and understanding, empathic and very interesting and inspiring you have become. ❤🤲🏻💛

[@angelamerson7299]

As a mother of a teenage daughter having trouble accepting her new body, I really appreciate you and your honesty. Thank you for being so bold. God is using you in big ways. You are a beautiful, perfect child of God. God Bless you❤️

[@jefreylabra2072]

Hi! Just wanna let you know that your videos help me a lot as a detransitioner . 10 months sober here.

[@nurseratched5537]

I think it is so great that you make these videos. I'm sure your helping a lot of people.

[@pattihoag2049]

Elle I think you are a beautiful Person, and i enjoy listening to all that you have learned about yourself.

[@huklj]

I want to transition and I enjoy watching your films. I lerned many things, to love my body despite anything. I'm still going to take hormones, just saying that everyone deserves happines in their own way :)

[@Starcrunch913]

You’re amazing I’m so proud of you. ✨🤍

[@maramassaferro]

Hi Elle, I have been following you for some time, I am a transsexual woman but I find your path really courageous and I would like to congratulate you, lately there are many blefs from religious fanatics who fear miraculous "cures" for transgender people, but your example makes us understand that yours is also one of the possible paths that a trans person can have, surely you had to go through all this to be here today, and surely you are a better person than yesterday, so once again let me tell you that you are a wonderful and strong woman, never regret what has been, because that's exactly what made you who you are today, a beautiful person for what I see from your videos, go on so beautiful Elle, and I hope that life can give you all the happiness you deserve. a big kiss: Mara 💖

[@-shmoopie-]

you are helping people! not any certain group of people either... just people 💕 I too feel the best out in nature, nothing gives me more than being on my horse out in the sun 😊☀️xx

[@valdez3245]

I think you are an incredibly brave and beautiful young woman! I really believe you are going to help many young people who are experiencing what you went through! Blessings to you!

[@Nameless-dw5nv]

I'd love to be friends with you, even though we're quite different. I feel that I've done the right choice for myself but I really feel for your struggles and I'm glad you're happier now.

[@donemrys418]

Very healthy perspective. We just need to find joy, fascination, and aw in life and realize the personality/ ego is the clothing we wear.

[@dumpstercub2902]

I think I need to be nicer to my body. Obviously there are parts of it I hate, but there are also parts I love. Maybe I’ll exercise today.

[@simfimpim]

You are helping so many people.

[@mindfulmuching4695]

That was fantastic...and I agree with everything she said, especially the part about being outside in nature.

[@samanthadelic]

omg hell yez i could tell you're probably a nature lover by your vibe~ i like climbing trees as well as hugging them and being outside in general especially in the woods.... its the best quality a human can have

[@crepethepancake]

One of the things that really stuck out to me while questioning my gender is that i was never ashamed of my body, it's fine, it does what it needs to, but it doesn't feel like it's 'me', ya know? Transitioning, for me, won't make my body 'better', just more 'me', if that makes sense? I adore your videos, Elle, I'm so proud of you! Much love, from a non-binary fan

[@ellepalmer]

that’s what I’m trying to convey here- your body IS you! if you can find that acceptance before transitioning, that will be immensely helpful for the rest of your life, even if you still decide to transition later. but accepting that this is your body- that transition won’t change anything substantial about you, just superficial- is crucial.

[@crepethepancake]

@@ellepalmer Absolutely! I 100% agree! One of the things my psychologist has said that helps is 'this is your body, and this is what it can do' rather than focusing on what you want to change. I appreciate the reply! Also, congrats on finishing your finals!

[@vernonbrechin4207]

I admire the perspectives that you've developed and I applaud you. I know friends who exhibit far more concern about how they appear to others, than I do. Some constantly change aspects of their appearance, perhaps to see if it improves how others perceive them. I too prefer to be out in nature and immersed in photography where social interactions have no place. I sport a neutral appearance that tends to avoid others who tend to be more judgmental than me. Be who you are with what you happen to have.

[@boredmillionaire9914]

my gosh you help me so much. thank you. ❤️

[@julianray]

Deeply profound insight. Thanks!

[@chandranapier2259]

Your journey is your own to walk and experience. No one can deny you that.

[@eliasvandrea9456]

I send you, so much love, this wisdom will become in something beautiful on your future

[@kevinkelley3657]

I love your skin tone, it is so pink and pretty, and your eyes are even more pretty. Many of us have body issues, I get it.

[@cyber1030]

Elle, You are reaffirming the definition of love. Thank you.

[@vbee75]

"Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." (Romans 12:2) "It is sown a natural body, it is raised a spiritual body. If there is a natural body, there is also a spiritual body." (1 Corinthians 15:54) [The physical body is a gift from God in order to grow your spiritual body, alterations to your physical body don't carry over into the next life, so don't invest too much of your happiness in the physical.]

[@Lee-eo2by]

You always have such a great message. Thank you for sharing!

[@llcrow9693]

No idea what your interests are, but it seems like you would be a great counselor for people struggling with growing up, as you have come so far in learning about accepting yourself.

[@Mina-pr6wp]

Beautiful words (and Elle!)

[@martiseelye6443]

Your voice is yours. It sounds like you. It's recognizable as your voice. People are suggestible. You can actually tell people what to think of your voice with suggestion. Like, haha yeah I've been told my voice is sultry, or that it's dusky and sexy. And they will think of it that way. You're gorgeous whatever your voice sounds like. You have beautiful eyes and a good heart. You're understanding and caring. All the good things in you win.

[@MsAdrammelech]

This was wonderful

[@isanunez3995]

Hi Elle, I’ve been watching your videos for quite a long time now and I really like the way you express yourself, I think the topics you talk about are really insightful. So , I understand where you come from and deeply relate with many of your perspectives on self-acceptance. However, I still have this constant battle with myself on that I can’t decide on whether transitioning will be the right choice for me. Sometimes I feel this urge and rush of happiness when I think I want to transition but then few days after a big fear just comes to me and I focus on just accepting myself as I am. I’ve been going through this same thought cycle for years and tbh it’s driving a little crazy because sometimes I feel like I cannot trust myself. Do you have any thoughts on this? Did you ever feel like that before transitioning? I would really appreciate your input. Also, hope you are doing well!

[@K0kirik4t]

Nobody can say what's right for you, we'd need to be inside your head. I just advise you to think about how you felt of your body and presentation before you developed any insecurities. Until I hit puberty and had a whole new set of expectations put on me that I couldnt meet, I had never been uncomfortable with my body or being a girl. Idk your situation but hope this helps a bit anyways !!

[@isanunez3995]

cameron r Hi, yes I know that ultimately I have to decide what’s best for me. I very much appreciate your input! Since I can remember I’ve always related more to boys, when it comes to how I present myself. That’s just how I feel comfortable. However, I acknowledge that there is nothing wrong with being a tomboy, so that’s what I embraced myself to be although I always had that deep wish to be born a boy. since realistically I didn’t, I really try to accept my body as it is. I really don’t care about what society thinks of me, I often pass as a boy sometimes as a girl, I’m like an in between in the eyes of society I would say, but I don’t have any insecurities when it comes to that. I believe that no matter what your gender is you can do and express however you want. What I struggle is that, for example, I would like to have a flat chest and male fat redistribution because I think I will feel more comfortable. At the same time, I don’t know if hormones and surgery is really worth it so I start to ponder whether it would be possible for me to get over this desire to transition. Is this something you’ve ever experienced? Again, thanks for responding.

[@elianna838]

Isa Nunez Full disclosure: I’m not a therapist so take this anecdote with a grain of salt. When I was a teenager I went on a five day camping trip with my sleep away summer camp where we weren’t allowed to have cell phones, no cameras (besides disposable), and we weren’t allowed to look in mirrors. When we arrived back to camp and were finally able to shower and brush our hair and just look at our faces in front of mirrors, I had never felt so comfortable in my body before. It was like meeting myself for the first time. I noticed how beautiful my face was, I didn’t see what I had previously been ashamed of. So, essentially, I recommend taking a break from everything that reminds you of your insecurities. Find something to do that stops you from thinking about your body. Then, once you’ve taken a break from that habitual thinking, try and meet your body like you’re doing so for the first time. What happens when you see yourself for the first time after a week of not seeing yourself? What self identity and self perspective develops when you’re not looking at yourself? Does it change? Does it remain the same? What do you feel? Are you relieved to see your body? Are you scared? And maybe this was a totally subjective and unique experience that happened to me, but not looking at yourself in a mirror and not looking at photographs of yourself for a week isn’t going to hurt you. Even if you don’t have a life changing experience, I’m sure you’ll learn something.

[@isanunez3995]

Elianna I really like your perspective. In fact, I’ve tried that multiple times. It does really help refresh your mind and take a break from the self- inflicted negativity rooted in comparison. Even after taking a mental break from obsessing over this, I always come back around to question things. Would you agree that it is just human nature to want to work towards something to improve yourself? Of course there should always be healthy limits and I think that self-love should always be the main goal there. I completely agree with you and Elle on that putting less focus on your body is really important, but don’t you think that to some degree our bodies and how we feel in them play an important part on our happiness? that there is always room of improvement? For instance, say a boy was born without legs, he can’t change that about himself. However, he could learn to live happy as he is ( as many inspirationally have done) or he could take the opportunity to get a prothesis. Prothesis is not really legs but will help him experience the world in more ways. This is a thought that many times really challenges my views on radical acceptance. What do you think about this? I really appreciate you and other people being open to discuss this with me because I really want to see other perspectives on this.

[@elianna838]

Isa Nunez I don’t think my answer is going to be what you’re looking for lol but anyways, I truly believe that it’s a personal choice. A person born without legs and growing up without legs or prosthetics is very different than a person born with legs who then lost them. Does the person born without legs feel like they’re missing out or does the person who once had legs feel like they’ve lost something? Another important thing to remember, is that not everyone can have prosthetics. Does that stop them from living a full and long healthy life? No, it doesn’t. For millennia there have been people who have been born without legs or had them and lost them. And fundamentally, the only reason four limbed humans feel bad and pity for non-four limbed humans is because there’s the perception that they are missing out on something that we have and also have no control over having. And our brains, which don’t really know how to handle/process the guilt of having something that’s out of our control, feel compelled to give legs to the legless, when in actuality we should be changing our societies and overcoming the guilt that makes us feel that the leg less absolutely need legs. Finally, it is my belief that only when our societies are accommodating to people born with physical differences, will we have real answers to your question. Now to connect that with what you’re really asking: my belief is that only when our societies have accepted the notion that gender is not a concept with a descriptive polarity and instead see gender identity as a personal collage of descriptors, will we be able to truly answer your question, because the reality is: we have no idea what identities we would taken on if the western concept of gender was completely removed from our brains. In a way, this dilemma of identity comes down to nature vs. nurture, i.e. are some people born with an internal struggle of identity or is an identity struggle nurtured in our youth?

[@dirtydishes68]

love your sweater omg

[@kaylamonell6707]

You are beautiful inside and out❤️ Thank you so much for sharing I can’t wait to watch and hear more😸

[@fapld7489]

Your voice is totally higher. Looking pretty girl. Really happy for you.

[@pianystrom8137]

I wonder why gender dysphoria became confused with being transgender. It's obviously not the same thing. Elle, I wish you all the best! Your experience taught you a lot. Thank you for sharing that.

[@kellinkbye1224]

thank you so much for this, honestly something i needed to hear :)

[@matthewmutz9337]

Great Vid Miss Palmer, Keep up the good work,, Hope to see you back on Twitter

[@easyenglishwithrachael1931]

You are a super beautiful soul! Also love the shirt, it really cute :)

[@LK-kk4lc]

And also great thing about you is your pronunciation. Let me explain, for me I am not English native it is really easy to undestand you and even better is that automatic subtitles catch almost everything you say

[@ifonlyseethrumyeyes8957]

You are so cool girl, just keep fighting!

[@JC-sm4mp]

Do you feel that all transgender people may be going down the wrong path in a way? (thats poorly worded, I'm struggling to put words to my thoughts.) I've always sort of stood against children transitioning, because permanently changing your body, as an insecure, and confused child, has a lot of room for error. But your view feels sort of as if you feel that transitioning isn't necessary for anyone. That people can learn to love and accept themselves regardless of their body, or gender.

[@Qantaspi]

J C children don’t medically transition

[@yourmomiswatching715]

J C if you have gender dysphoria you will never accept the sex you were born as, that's why 40% trans people kill themselfs. Transitioning is the only way to make the gender dysphoria better.

[@blaulin]

I guess the complicated thing is, people don't know if they could be happy without transitioning without really considering and working through their issues. But it's really hard to know yourself. Your mind is good at distracting you with false problems that make someone not work on the real problems, that's why it's important that people like Elle get a voice. Imo the majority of people who identify as trans are using this state to either escape trauma or their perceived social prison. But after all of that, I think there are some people who have gender dysphoria in a really fundamental way which can only counteracted by transitioning. And that on it's own shouldn't have any stigma. Adults should be able to live their own lives the way they want to.

[@yourmomiswatching715]

tricky smith that's not true, if you went through a trauma and decided to "transition" because of it and then regret it you never were trans in the first place, there are still more people trans than there are detrans people. It's not the majority.

[@blaulin]

@@yourmomiswatching715 That easier said than done lol. No one decides to be trans just as no one decides to hate their body, perception or themselves. If you hate these things, it's hard to know, why - and it's easy to think it's because of your gender. You can't see who really IS trans or not because it's an internal feeling. Also, most people have trauma in some way. I don't talk about sexual assault, I also mean stuff like emotional abuse, prejudices etc. And people that deviate from the norm, which people who identify as trans do, probably did experience trauma.

[@iamlight1]

Four excellent things!

[@someonesomewhere1500]

Your voice is getting softer. I know you said before you were worried about it. You look lovely.

[@dylancole1910]

I'm so glad your doing well, you are a beautiful girl no matter what you sound like. Keep trudging on sister👍🏻😊

[@calneil6457]

Did dysphoria go away as you began to present as female / feminine again? I have dysphoria so bad and don't know what to do with it. I identified as a trans man for 5 years then after some therapy wasnt so sure and quickly assumed i would detransition but, the dysphoria is still always there. Were your parents accepting of you and supportive when you transitioned? I am really glad you are happier now.

[@mclaughlincreatives]

Hi Elle! I found your videos a few months ago. I am a mom of 2 kids, both are adults, and both of them are transitioning to the opposite gender from their birth gender. My son is 31 and is MTF. My daughter is 22 and is FTM. My son came out to me in 2014 when he was 25. He said he had been struggling with gender dysphoria for a very long time and insisted that he was born with a female brain in a male body. A few years later, when my daughter was 17 (2016) and in her senior year of HS, she came out too. She said pretty much the same thing as my son. She was born with a male brain in a female body. As a parent hearing that my oldest child was transitioning was difficult to deal with. But to have both of my children transitioning is devastating. I am trying my hardest to be there for them. I have come a long way in accepting that I cannot change them. I don't agree with what they believe, but I let them know that I am here for them no matter what and I always love them. It was a very rocky start but we have a better relationship now that we have met each other somewhere in the middle. I am still heart broken. It feels like my birth children have died and I never got to say goodbye. There was no funeral. No closure for me. Yet, I know it angers them and offends nearly every person in the Transgender community to hear a parent say that. My children always say, "I am still here! I am not dead!" But they aren't looking at it through a parent's eyes. I have said a lot. Sorry for the long comment. I really wanted to thank you for being so brutally honest. It gives me hope. Please keep posting. - Cheri McLaughlin

[@JohnSmith-vu5zn]

I always found it confusing that the trans community agree that gender is a social construct, yet why do those who don't follow one of the two main constructs feel the need to physically change themselves to match? like you said in a previous video, if there are things someone wants to do that don't follow their gender conventions, then they should just do them. Guys can paint their nails, girls can not shave. whatever. no need to conform to one or the other arbitrary constructs. you do you.

[@sylviaswayne]

John Smith I’m trans, and I just want to politely answer your question. Trans people don’t generally believe that the social constructs require the “need to physically change.” For most trans people, the physical changes affirm the gender they identify as. For me, I experience gender dysphoria, which in my specific situation means I feel distress being seen as male and having some traditionally “male” anatomy, but I recognize that some “male” features are common in female people. I medically transition to alleviate that distress and that is the ONLY reason I do it. I don’t believe those features make me MORE of a woman. Additionally, both trans people (at least most... maybe not the “activists” on Twitter) and gender critical people acknowledge that there are biological, anatomical differences between male and female people, so to be seen as a woman (or man) may require confirming to those constructs to be validated. It doesn’t mean we think they are required to BE a woman or man, it just is a social tool to be seen the way we want to be seen. I understand why it can be confusing, especially because my view is not the only one, but I guess that’s the problem with identity politics, after all. I agree that if someone wishes to do something gender nonconforming, they have every right to and don’t have to be trans to do so. I hope this helps!

[@JohnSmith-vu5zn]

@@sylviaswayne thank you for taking the time. I 100% agree regarding body dysphoria. I was more talking about gender in terms of behavioral norms rather than physical features. What I mean to emphasis in my original comment is that people shouldn't feel pressured to change physically if the behavior they want to do is not traditionally done by those of their own sex. such as doing traditionally girly things for guys like wearing makeup, painting nails, and wearing skirts. There are a lot of traditionally 'girly' things that are normal for guys to do nowadays like grow long hair, braiding it, shaving arms/legs, and in some cultures wearing skirts such as the Scottish kilt. Some traditionally manly things that girls can do nowadays are things like wearing pants, wearing a suit, not shaving arms/legs, shaving head, etc. I meant to make a distinction between biological sex (physical features) and gender construct (behavior norms). when it comes to the former, I am aware that body dysphoria can cause immense distress, so changing the physical (because we live in an amazing day and age where that is possible) is very much encouraged. of course. to reiterate, i just don't think someone (who doesn't have body dysphoria) should feel pressured to transition to the opposite gender simply because they enjoy doing the behaviors themselves. I hope that makes sense. thanks again for taking the time to reply. I appreciate it :)

[@sylviaswayne]

John Smith oh, well, honestly I would agree with that! I don’t try to “gatekeep” as the trans community calls it because who am I to tell people what to do, but I definitely agree that if that distress isn’t there, why put yourself through it all? I guess I just have to live and let live in those cases. I just hope people who don’t experience dysphoria take the time to reflect on it and make sure they’re really acting in their best interests. Thank you for clarifying and having a kind moment with me! 💕

[@virginiaterrore7784]

Great words of wisdom

[@theotherkangaroo]

💗💗💗💗

[@happyzinny]

Going outside and moving your body 💯💯💯💯💯💯

[@laramauss1968]

you are a beautiful woman and people will be astonished for a few Minutes about your voice. Than it doesn’t matter any more. Don’t be sad, if it happens at the beginning, it’s normal that people recognize it. But they will forget about it. Like me 😄

[@Chelone95]

You've learned very important things!!! 👌🏻👏🏻❤️😘

[@youngl3760]

Where is your Twitter :( Btw. i love your videos and the style you explain things.Sorry for my bad english im from germany.Keep going :)

[@dopedreamz]

Wow, awesome green eyes. Blue maybe? They may look green because of the green wall behind you but they're bright! And yeah after 3 minutes you just hear you, not your voice.

[@loneangler9063]

hey keep up the great videos!!!

[@RemyRAD]

Now the one thing I have learned how to do in my life and career. And that's how to turn a negative into a positive.. So, once you realize. When you record yourself and compare yourself to other women. You are definitely the man speaking amongst women. You can hear that. It's unmistakable. You now speak with chest tone and tonality. As you have created a physiological change in your body. From taking testosterone for a couple of years. It's a growth hormone. And it told your voice to grow into that of a man's. And change back as you like. It's not going to. You cannot undo your new physiology that has transpired within your body. However the good thing. You will never have to worry about prostate cancer. And not being able to go to the bathroom. You'll have to worry about cervical and ovarian cancer. And also because. If you become a mommy. And daddy has a higher voice than you know. How do you think that might confuse your youngster? Sorry honey. Your mommy and daddy doesn't sound like other mommy and daddy's do. Even though mommy sounds more like daddy than daddy. And actually your kid will accept that. Though I cannot imagine what it will be like? When you are in the hospital giving birth, naturally. And people are hearing a man screaming for death. Police will come barging in with guns drawn. So push hard fast and often. And then wonder why you did not stay a man. And realize that women are put through the worst death-defying pain in the world. And those who do not defy it. And that's certainly let you know you are most definitely a woman. Especially when you have an infant biting your nipples. Which I am told is also problematic when their teeth come into soon. They won't even let their husbands do that to them. And because they cannot smack the baby, cross, the head. And telling them if they do that one more time. They will only get the rubber one! Of which your husband would also not know the difference. And so you do know being a woman is a much more difficult lifestyle to overcome. Where your only rights are doled out by men. Some also like to add a little, dill with their doling. Because others don't have anything that works. And which is all still too high in, salt. And trying to poison you when he says swallow it. When you then know what gross things he has been eating for dinner. And doesn't taste as sweet as women do. All you have unfortunately discovered. That your favorite lesbians. Don't want to be with a guy. Even if you were a former girl. And well, whoops. Honest baby. I only sound like a man. Now come on. Spread your legs. So I can get down to business. Yeah and you're going to have to try and change your speech patterns as well. Girls are not in the Army like you wanted to be. But fell a little short, in their requirements. Honest! It's there! I've been on medication for three years. That's all the bigger it got. At maybe you can give me free surgery to fix that? No? I'm what? I'm not a girl! Dog gone it. I'm not a girl. Don't call me a girl! I know how to change my own tires. I know how to shave my face. I have to do it every day. Along with my legs, pits, tits, underarms, up my thighs, all over my backside, on my chest, on my arms, on my fingers. And around my ass hole that has gotten all fuzzy and full of hair. And then I get 2 day shadow and its very uncomfortable. And then I get keloids on my a notice and it will require dermabrasion. So I can smile again. I'm jealous as FUCK over you. As I make a fine female man. Just like you. I've got my boobs and my pussy. And my voice. Which is a great impersonation of, Don Lafontaine. So I sound a bit strange in the ladies locker room at the local gym and health spa. I don't say much. It wouldn't work in my favor if I did. And well, I eventually did. And was therefore terminated and expelled. But only because, I look and sound like you. I've got a nice female body and good boobs. With no artificial ingredients. Nice hair just like yours. But I sound like you. And you better get used to being discriminated against as a man pretending to be a woman.. And don't get arrested by becoming an exhibitionist out of pure frustration. And do not keep special prizes to pull out of your pussy just to prove it. As you will end up with some jail guard poking around inside of you. Which I have to admit. Was sort of exciting and fun. Because I did not know her at all. Hello there. Why are you looking at me in the wrong face? I'm over here on the other side of me. But she wanted to play with my Cycloptic, alternate identity. And decided to go in for a look. And so I guess that was my first experience as a lesbian? As I could most definitely say. She was really into it. She was into me. And I didn't even know her name? And the love affair was quite brief. Once she got what she wanted. Out of it. A lubricated finger. That was more lubricated. Than, when it went in. And a bit kinky for me. When they made me bend over. I prefer face to face. I felt a bit disenfranchised here. It was fun. But not gratifying. And so. You must now be prepared. For using the ladies room. When you get arrested. And where your ID may not be good enough. They might put you into a dark office. To have you explain. How you precisely administer, blow jobs. So you better start practicing. Because that's what men are going to want to see from you. And they might not have any available inanimate devices for you to prove that upon. But they have extras standing by. And they will make a determination. Whether you have a female tongue or a male tongue. As they likely know the difference between those two. And I don't know what other physiological changes that testosterone has Done to you? I always knew that my husband marveled over my stamina. I told him I was extremely articulate. And a cunning linguist. And he knew I was incredibly capable at that. Since he had been born a girl like you. And I never objected to him falling short. In some areas. And I was appreciative of that. Because anything larger can make you gag. Or if it has a condom on it. It's almost like, Hubba Bubba, bubblegum. Where I find this incredible desire to, chomp down hard on it. And you can't do that. They get all upset. But it's just like, Hubba Bubba Bubble Gun. Which is made from, plastic. And so I'm not personally, that kind of girl. As I only dig, like and chew. Hubba Bubba Bubble Gum, to begin with. I guess my great downfall. And because most condoms are not available in fruit flavors. And you'll never find one in Beeman's. If you do? I'll just have to settle for the blue raspberry and watermelon flavors. Thankfully they do not have a seman, flavor for that gum. But I bet a lot of teenage girls would try it and gay boys.. But I have grown beyond that. And demons is flavored from pepsin. Which can soothe your stomach. When you are giving a blow job. And I don't know why that is not available? There! I have just instilled your future career. You need to go to work for the Trojan company. And introduce those new flavored condoms. It will make you a millionaire overnight. And then you can open up your own company. And make other flavors. Perfect for a girl who turned into a man, to do. For your fellow sisters and gay guys. And give back to the community. Speaking from the voice of authority. NOW LISTEN TO ME LADIES. YOU KNOW WE HAVE TO USE TAMPONS. THAT NO GUY IS GOING TO SUCK ON. BUT THEY WANT US TO SUCK ON THEIRS. SO I ALWAYS ENJOY AND RECOMMEND OUR BEEMAN'S FLAVORED CONDOMS. WHICH IS WHAT I INSIST UPON WITH MY HUSBAND. WHEN HE IS WEARING HIS CUTE BLACK HOSE WITH SEEMS, GARTER BELT AND HIS CUTE LITTLE FRILLY BRASSIERE. WHEN YOU'RE MAKING LOVE. In your beautiful deep voice.. In a blouse that's low-cut showing your cleavage. You will then make so many millions of dollars for the Trojan company. You'll end up purchasing the company. And you will do scientific work. To create a self blow job condom for men to play with themselves with. So good women don't have to. And it's washable. It's made out of silicone. You heated for 15 seconds in a microwave. So it swells and gets warm. Give it to your husband. And go about your daily life. And he'll know you are the greatest woman in the world. And then once in a while. You let him take an actual ride. But only when you make the carnival environment for your bedroom right for you. With hammers and sickles on the wall. As decorations. Along with a framed newspaper article about Lorena Bobbitt. And you will have a most wonderful marriage. Being in charge. Calling the shots. The who, the what, the why and the when. And letting your husband know in your deepest bosso profoundo. When to take out the trash. When to clean the bathrooms. When to cut the grass. Otherwise no gnocchi tonight. And just watch how well that works.

[@aje4298]

Elle, I'm a cis female and I found your videos a couple of weeks back and I've been really interested in your story. I've always been for trans rights and I believe transgender people do exist, completely. I guess I thought you did too? You didnt seem like you stopped believing in true transgenderism like I totally thought you just knew it was you that got it wrong and not the whole community, but I realise now that I might of got that wrong? What is your thoughts on people transitioning? Do you still believe people can be trans?

[@SkaterPunkie]

Is there anyway you can make your voice higher pitched? I know some trans go thru vocal chord surgery

[@CraigGorsuch]

Is the septum ring new, of have I missed that the whole time? No judgment, just curious...

[@heathereagle2984]

It's been there!

[@SkaterPunkie]

How did your beard stop growing or did you go thru laser removal?

[@louisemitchell3418]

You are so intelligent you would make a good therapist or public speaker.

[@Connie-ty5zb]

Nature is a cure for sure!

[@domy6827]

More of you, please

[@jackiepena4369]

Your voice is part of your story. Its different but who cares.

[@nc17atnce101]

you have a great voice. i love it.