CREEPY DM Gives A Player A Proposition That Will SHOCK YOU

[@LeRodz]

Can't wait for the universe to finally balance unlucky player's luck and make him spend the next several months rolling nothing but natural 20's.

[@stephenstarr9045]

"Dm gives proposition to player that'll shock you" Doge I've seen enough of your videos to know nothing shocks me anymore.

[@pippo17173]

The last story, that guy isn't into poly. He is basically using it to make a harem and try to force it into reality.

[@mrroboshadow]

yep unless the rest of the horny assholes were his boyfriends (doubt it), dude aint nothing but a horny scumbag like the guys who tell girls they're gay to get female friends then suddenly become bi-curious/ bi/turned straight or whatever, whenever they decide its time to get in their pants

[@CaIypso5150]

That is how all poly people are you fool. Most just manipulate far better.

[@andrewhladun3671]

That first story (unlucky) was surprisingly wholesome. The party also needs to be commended in my opinion because I always hate running with someone who has garbage luck

[@FordPrefict42]

The first story sounds like he has the Will Wheaton curse!?! Will has a long standing history to underperform in dice games.

[@myautobiographyafanfic1413]

"I roll to seduce" you don't roll to anything. You try something and if the DM tells you to, you roll.

[@Karajorma]

"You tumble to the ground and forward roll. The woman is not impressed" "No I mean I roll dice!" "Why the hell are you telling me, the DM, that you roll anything? I tell you when to roll!"

[@myautobiographyafanfic1413]

@@Karajorma you said what I said, but 500x better

[@BlueTressym]

This is something that's not made clear enough in advice to new players OR new DMs.

[@mikaneko]

@@Karajorma "The woman instead is in hysterics laughing and walks away. You now have the reputation as being the town idiot." :3

[@Captaincory1]

The spell Find Familiar is a ritual spell that needs to be cast with a lit brassier so I feel like other characters would notice someone casting it

[@TheLevantin]

And the ritual lasts 1 hour.

[@benjamingarrett2497]

Could have been cast on a night watch.

[@boaringday3121]

I thought material components are optional as long as you have an arcane focus.

[@Captaincory1]

@@boaringday3121 not if the materials have a specified monetary value or are consumed, for find familiar it's 10 gp in charcoal, insense, and herbs that are consumed in the brazier's fire

[@justsomeloserlol]

goddamn, that first story ALMOST sounds like me, my group has joked about my luck that they seriously letting me have the lucky feat for every character i make

[@KatarnandKanos]

Great thing about Sigil, it has a built in countermeasure to That Guys. She's called the Lady of Pain, and she is fearsome.

[@therismetrengaarde8315]

If you ever played Planescape, you definitely know that the Lady is nobody you want to fuck with. Good on you for having that, my dude.

[@SamWeltzin]

Yeah. One of the few things in D&D never statted. Even gods were statted, but never The Lady of Pain. That's how insanely powerful she is.

[@johngleeman8347]

@@SamWeltzin Caine and the Lady of Pain cannot be hurt, cannot be slain. XD

[@fructosecornsyrup5759]

Boy, I know it would probably never feasibly happen, but damn do I wanna make a LoP warlock so bad.

[@TF2BluSoldier]

For that first story - get that man into Dark Heresy. If he can roll 1s on a D100 reliably? He'll be unstoppable.

[@MaxinEve]

Exactly! Think on the criticals to the head he's gonna have, Or the Psyker explosions while channeling the Warp.

[@mrroboshadow]

@@MaxinEve i mean if he's THAT unlucky im gonna bet if he does play it, he'll suddenly start rolling high numbers

[@Michaeljack81sk]

I feel like there might be more to Joe's story than just a Problem Player. I wouldn't mind hearing Joe's side

[@AM-yk5yd]

Well, OP specifically omitted lots of things: "going insane bit, dead spirit crow and much more I won't mention here".

[@TheMightyBattleSquid]

8:52 Yeah, at least they went out with a bang. It's sure to be ammo-ment to remember 😉

[@K_i_t_t_y84]

Commenting to support you Doge, Love your channel and your kitties ♥♥

[@Sigilstone17]

Guy in story 1 would be amazing in games using the 2d20 system (it's all about rolling below a threshold and achieving a certain number of "successes" to pass a challenge)

[@spectrelead]

With his 'luck', he'd start rolling the big numbers in such a system

[@Sigilstone17]

@@spectrelead just donate him to science at that point

[@spectrelead]

@@Sigilstone17 Truth!

[@starbird3939]

Story 1 I have a running gag that my pc is the most inattentive person in the world because she usually rolls low on perception rolls.

[@DnDDoge]

Our Cleric always rolls super bad on acrobatics checks, that our characters always ask if he needs help walking up a hill.

[@DarthJudicar22]

Wow, on that first one it sounds like Wil Wheaton may have competition.

[@nnickplays9713]

Thank you again for the videos! Always a treat! By the way, Rygar, how is that game? Is it any good?

[@DnDDoge]

I like it. Like a more tame God of War.

[@stephenblevins3829]

The Bladerunner RPG is a Free League game. One of our gaming group just got his Kickstarter in last week and we played it last Saturday. It was really fun.

[@rustyshackleford1910]

After two crit rolls the blade runner dm should have declared that the bazooka guy realized how dumb pulling the trigger would be and swung the bazooka instead, knocking the replicant to prone and damaging it

[@Pyrrha312]

This. Punishing the group because one player rolled well is just absurd. Make the rocket go through the bad guy, and then off the window with the baddie in tow.

[@MaxinEve]

if it was Warhammer, this dude was amazing. A critical hit on the head. The gore was ensued.

[@truerandomness]

Hey, it's me, u/LittleBrassGoggles. I just wanted to say thank you for reading my story. You're totally sweet!

[@frederikklotzskov9673]

seriously have this people never heard of craigslist?! 'cause that's why we have craigslist!

[@PaladinGear15]

When they killed the guy's familiar, that was just the players being dicks. Even if they thought it was just some random animal, do they always go around murdering random animals for no reason? Nah, they metagamed to know it was it was his familiar and killed it just to be jerks. Kinda like how Matt Mercer randomly has town guards abandon their duties to go out of their way to kill Caleb's familiar when they have no reason to do so (happened 3 times from what I remember, then there was the gelatinous cube ignoring everyone else to kill the cat).

[@Captaincory1]

I left my own comment saying the other characters should've noticed him performing a ritual with a lit brassier that the spell demands

[@Kennisaurus]

I'm sorry what? Why would he do something like that? Does he genuinely think animal murder is funny or something?

[@TheLevantin]

In a world where the vampire lord is spying on you through animals and there's a spooky ghost bird flying around, the thought that it's a danger is very reasonable. Also, this animal is not a real animal. It is not a spirit that can neither die nor feel pain. It's an example of players not metagaming. Would you assume that this particular bird is not dangerous, but everyone else is, that's metagaming. The players didn't do anything wrong, neither did the DM or the ritual caster. It's a classic misunderstanding

[@PaladinGear15]

@@Captaincory1 If they did see it then they'd know its his familiar and once again have no reason to kill it beyond being jerks.

[@TheLevantin]

@@Kennisaurus You do know that the animals in DnD aren't real and only exist in the imagination, right? And "killing" something that neither exists nor lives is impossible, and to say so is utterly absurd. No real being was hurt in this story. And there are meta-levels of humor where the act of hurting an animal can be funny. I can't explain the complex world of humor to you now. As I said: In these jokes no real animal is hurt and you laugh at a meta level that doesn't exist. Nobody finds it funny that a real animal gets hurt. But nobody here, neither in the video nor in the comments, has said anything like that. You argue against a straw man.

[@fructosecornsyrup5759]

My roommate successfully seduced a door once. It wouldn't open for anyone else but him from that point onwards.

[@Royalbluelemonz]

Ah, the curse of eternal bad luck. I roll sub par myself, and it seems like a everyone else I play with seldom rolls below a 15. I've become partial to playing support and skill monkies, because I just know I'll be useless if I try to actively do anything in a game. And my rolls reverse luck if a ttrpg requires low rolls; I only roll high. This happens with physical dice, online dice rollers, etc. I even took turns rolling a single dice with a friend and consistently rolled lower than he did every single time. It can be a bit disheartening, especially when a DM tells you that you missed something that would've been really useful previously because you just didn't roll high enough.

[@FirstDarkAngel2001]

Yeah... always ask first on preferences, and also boundaries very much so. You also are completely correct, Doge. Polyamory is WAY different than what happened. I hate greatly of people throwing that out so easily when they aren't, giving actual ones a bad name. Sry, small rant based on I once upon a time being one.

[@Densoro]

I relate to that unluckiest player. I didn't play D&D for very long, but I had several combats where I rolled exclusively 3s and 5s on my d20. And I do mean 'exclusively' -- not any 4s. My DM once gave me _five mulligans on a single turn_ so that I could successfully hit _one enemy_ before combat ended. I've been shopping around on indie TTRPGs that can mitigate that sort of 'dicefuckery.' Tenra Bansho Zero lets you spend points of life force to boost rolls -- but if you spend all your life force, you either die or become a hostile NPC.

[@deepseastonecore3017]

Thanks 4 all the hard work.

[@Azazyael]

My elf in 2nd edition rolled a skunk for his find familiar. I gleefully introduced Mr Stinkybottom to EVERYONE.

[@Zane13pyro]

The unlucky player should play a a halfling School of Divination Wizard with lucky feat lol

[@tsifirakiehl4250]

First story: Oof. Well, at least they’re trying to accommodate this poor guy. Second story: First of all, I’m amazed that OP has dreams coherent enough to make one-shots out of. Second of all, that table sounded like a nightmare to DM for. Here’s hoping OP can run that game again with a decent set of players. Third story: To be fair to the party, they at least managed to take out their targets. Fourth story: I have to admit, I kind of feel bad for Joe. Sure, the characters didn’t know the crow was his familiar, but a) from their perspective, it was just a random animal which they had no reason to kill, and b) the players DID know and chose to have their characters murder their friend’s pet. If I was in Joe’s position, I would have left the group when that happened, because in-character, my pet is now dead and I don’t want to travel with the people who murdered it, and the fact that they didn’t know it was my pet makes it worse because now I know that they’re the kind of people who go around killing random animals for kicks. Out of character, I would no longer want to play with people who would kill another PC’s pet just to be mean. Joe was definitely unreasonable later on, but the way the other players treated him was not okay. Fifth story: Polyamory is irrelevant to the horror of this story. The real horror is the fact that this person’s idea of seduction is SITTING THERE AND WATCHING THEIR FRIEND MAKE R@PE THREATS TO OP! There’s absolutely nothing hot about that situation, and anyone who thinks there is has serious issues.

[@gazblackheart4596]

Say what you want about ICP music but one of the main dudes is super wholesome about his furry daughter and everything I hear about the fans seems positive and accepting. I never liked them as a music group but just seeing random coverage of them they seem like pretty good people despite the content of their songs. All I really know about the music is that fucking magnets meme lol.

[@gurmyigoll3535]

Is the thumbnail Sam Bankman-Fried? It's quite good.

[@ryanrizzo4869]

Why, WHY do some of these people feel like the last story's players think it is O-fucking-K to creep on people like that?! The minute a hand touched my thigh, I'd be swinging. Period.

[@stoicshield]

Unlucky dude should play a different system, where rolling low is good... but that probably means he suddenly rolls super high XD

[@justingibson4111]

The blade runner story; I’m pretty sure most projectile based explosives have a minimum travel distance before they can detonate

[@kisaknight626]

For the story with the troll and seeing/noticing the trolls aversion to fire, I think a low perception check, unrolled as it could be noticed with the "Passive Perception" save should have been enough. But as a DM, that is how I would have played it out.

[@vortega472]

Little Lucky the Ninja cat! Sort of LOL. As to the last story - Poor OP - that just sucks she (and others) have to go through stuff like this. As a DM I'd like to say I never pulled that crap - but unfortunately I was inappropriate to one female player - and I just wish I could go back in time and slap myself for my actions. Allison - if you are by chance reading this - I'm sorry I was a jerk to you and inappropriate.

[@theofficerfactory2625]

That poor player is story 1. Don't let them roll on the wild magic table! They could end the world!!!! The Bladerunner one. So stupid! As someone who knows how AT-M's work, there are models that can be fired indoors but... backblast and then the overpressure wave of the impact... yeah. Stupid.

[@CooperAATE]

Lmao that poor first guy

[@ryanrizzo4869]

"Though, I liked Insane Clown Posse when I was 13, but I got better." Lol. Oh, thank the Hods. XD

[@JacobL228]

Please stop giving people that don't deserve it the benefit of the doubt; being 13 doesn't mean you're brain-dead. I know I, for one, was nowhere near that bad when I was that age (I liked playing RuneScape and listening to The All-American Rejects, not seducing and killing everything I see in a TTRPG); those people were just trolls.

[@peger]

2:30 We should look at this from the brighter side. What is the chance of constantly rolling so low? brity low :D Maybe he should try lottery

[@Ironbattlemace]

Understanding laughter at ICP.

[@silverwizardess7921]

A great way to wake up. Thanks for these videos.

[@price763]

For the very unlucky player. I have two ideas. 1. Reverse his dice. 1 is worth a 20. And a 20 is a 1. 2. Play a bard with college of eloquence. He cannot fail a charisma check even if he rolls low.

[@KugelBlitz0]

RIP lost frying pan.

[@LatulaArts]

The one group who meets consistently at my local game shop is.. idk if I can call them a polycule... but they're all dating the one girl in the group and just kinda pass her around like a toy and they tried to get my friend to join the group and their relationship. She warned me about them when I was considering asking about their game. Dodged a bullet.

[@flexiblenerd]

1st story: how much you wanna bet he played with Will Wheaton?

[@Specnerd7]

Ah yes, my favorite doge of the internet. What a good morning

[@slacknhash]

It's a shame those bazooka bladerunners won't live, but then... who does?

[@nickwyrmfang]

Oh wow. Rygar gameplay. Now THAT takes me back.

[@xzenitramx666]

Dices hate me too. This felt close.

[@Lothmar22]

Have they tried rolling with the spoon?

[@alextheguardianangel]

great to see my story in there, (the Joe one), keep it up doge!

[@RiveroftheWither]

Sorry for your loss. Honestly Joe sounds like the type to set Skyrim to Novice difficulty and use cheat mods or console commands to max out skill levels, perks and get 10,000 hp because he can't anything not going his characters way. Everything you described was either just normal player bad luck that effected everyone or the players behaving reasonably in situations. I really don't get the logic of blaming you for the other characters killing a seemingly random crow stalking them. I too would assume some enemy caster of some kind was spying on us unless he said otherwise. What was even the point of him keeping the familiar secret anyway? I just don't get it.

[@kelpiekit4002]

The unluckiest player needs to play Call of Cthulhu. Then he might start rolling high.

[@romanov3937]

WTF was that last story god fucking damn.

[@nickmanzo8459]

Rolling a 1 on a d100 would be amazing in Call of Cthulhu!

[@scarsgaard1834]

Dude. I'm 51 and icp is still one of my fav bands :😜

[@ChaosCounseling]

Oh shit were did lucky come from

[@rugtub3744]

One doesnt get better from ICP, fam. D&D with the clown till Im dead in the ground.

[@Thedragonlover95]

Solid Lucky, Meow Gear

[@Tirath]

The unlucky player should give Warhammer Fantasy Role Play a try (2e). Low rolls are successes, though their damage would probably still suffer.

[@SirWasted]

i want to try out some online ttrpg, never done it before, can some1 in these comments recomend where and how to start ? ty :)

[@LokienSilver]

The second story… a grassland? In Sigil?

[@KrazyKoto]

So I have never played DnD... I have a question with that second to the last story with the troll. Are you not able to just cast random elemental spells to see what the monster is weak against? Does it have to be found out through perception? In RPGs all I tend to do is cast random elements and if I notice something hits harder, I start spamming that. Are you not able to make your character do that in DnD?

[@lycansniper2295]

You can usually do it with random spell slinging, assuming that your DM bothers to mention that X or Y spell seemed to really hurt the creature. I learned the hard way in Pathfinder that the JubJub bird changes elemental resistances when struck. So my fist shot with an ice enchanted bow was fine but the second shot at best annoyed it.

[@kamidarko]

Biggest horror story I have ever heard form this channel is that you were into ICP. Woop Woop indeed.

[@colinchildress1251]

Your videos keep me going.

[@bilonic111]

That first guy should try playing Call of Chthulu

[@vegetin01]

Was the putting a hand on your thigh in game or out of game?

[@Qwerty95ish]

I have the reverse luck. Over two games my d20 average was a 14 ish Twist I am the DM, my players figured this out.

[@starbird3939]

Last Story Yeah, I not only would have asked for a transfer, but I would have also shown manager the text. Dude is a fucking creepo

[@broke_af_games9661]

I'm sort of like that unluckiest player. It's just a thing for some people LOL So I'm usually the dungeon master and everybody's happy because of it. Lol. But when I play, I try to Play support. Unless you actively stop me, I can't fail at cure wounds.

[@JohnSmith-jv7mv]

MAGNETS!

[@religiousotaku9926]

Side note Rygar was my shit as a teen

[@balazsvarga1823]

Was the first player a beautiful blonde paladin lady from the Dustiness noble family?

[@legionofyuri]

Little pet peeve about the second-to-the-last story. Why people lock away in-game information they deem very important to the players behind knowledge or perception rolls I will never understand. If it's legitimate important enough information, just allow the players to find it without rolling jeez.

[@chuckwolf9869]

wil wheaton?

[@SnaxTheSnaxolotl]

Heyoooo I’m finally on time

[@Ginger_bearded_bro_88]

If we're being honest here, doge, I was a juggalo too. I also got better but have a tattoo to remind me of my cringey past every single day.

[@OxyMauron]

I had a feeling the poly story would be underwhelming. I was wrong, but focusing on the polycule aspect was really burying the lede. One guy threatens character rape, another goes out of his way to get handsy, and DM tops it off with a romantic invitation.

[@slagarcrue85]

To dnd doggie 5 short stories in 19 minutes. You spoil this fox and your other subscribers doggie as much as you spoil your 6 adorable cats. Have a great day dude.

[@Jermbot15]

They had two sessions and there are too many complaints for you to list? Either he complains about silly stuff or something is wrong here.

[@joswire44]

Hey man I really love your videos! I am also trying to grow a channel and I really appreciate your consistency. Keep up the good work friend!

[@Rtrstormghost327]

Omg that’s funny

[@slagarcrue85]

You had the right to crack those sick guys jewels girl in finale storey. You put your foot down and get reasonable absertive girl.

[@RiveroftheWither]

I used to like Simple Plan when I was 13 but then I got better.

[@adamtifone9243]

That player needs to buy new dice, and destroy his old ones while his new ones watch. To show them what happens when the dice screw him. Lol

[@caldycat]

I have to disagree with what you said at the end. No one should be fired for behavior outside of work.If he were to be fired, that would set up both the op and employer for potential lawsuits for wrongful termination. It would be as if you were fired from any job because you read reddit stories online. You did nothing wrong at your job, but they still fired you because of non workplace activity.

[@slagarcrue85]

Teenagers what a troublesome annoyence and serious problem they can be if not disciplined enough that is ethically acceptable by the majority of sane people.

[@cassiopeia_real]

the first story is 100% fake lmao

[@CallMeKes]

I feel really bad for the girl in that last story because of how much it upset her. But did she try telling them to stop/knock it off? I wouldn't call it sexual harassment or even warranting her reaction unless she told them to leave her be and they kept it up. However, they also should have told her their interests in her before the game. So, issues with this group all around.

[@dadanny187]

Imagine dissing a band that makes more money and they make better content than yourself 😉😜

[@ashrannafkhiend9728]

dudemanbro from the first story would be great at THAC0