Kurtis' Depersonalization Recovery Story (2023)

02:25 Depersonalization From Weed
06:32 "Why won't this go away?"
07:54 Kurtis' DPDR Symptoms
09:28 "Floating through life"
09:46 SSRI Medication
10:57 Existential Thoughts
12:44 Loss of Appetite
16:47 Talking to Doctors
20:25 "I ceased to exist for 3 weeks"
21:14 Telling people about DPDR
23:53 "My Lowest Point..."
28:56 Depersonalization Recovery
31:00 "I started having days with DP"
32:49 The DP Manual
35:28 Life after Depersonalization
38:40 Advice for DPDR sufferers
⚡ Start YOUR 💯 recovery from DPDR today! 👉🏼 www.dpmanual.com/purchase/
Kurtis is 21 years old. He's currently in University, studying Business + Spanish. He had a bad weed experience which triggered chronic Depersonalization and Derealization. As he described it to me when we first spoke, Kurtis experienced chronic feelings of disconnection, intense existential thoughts, and hyperawareness of self and vision, amongst other symptoms. Fortunately, Kurtis was able to quickly understand and address the condition, and was able to make a relatively fast recovery.
And he's with us today to tell us about his experience with and recovery from weed-induced Depersonalization Disorder!
Connect with me!
/ depersonalizationmanual
/ dpmanual
Disclaimer: Please note that the medical information contained within this video is not intended as a substitute for consultation with a professional physician and is not a recommendation of specific therapies.

[@Dpmanual]

⚡ Start YOUR 💯 recovery from DPDR today! 👉🏼 www.dpmanual.com/purchase/

[@Mamarentiana]

Hello, Sir. I have an impression that derealization is somehow a cause of instantly withdrawing an addiction. I am currently having Effexor XR 150mg and when I skip having it even one day, sth. like derealization happens. People call it "electroshock" / "Brain zap". I am not so sure that they are really the same but my boyfriend suffers from derealization and I thought there may be a link. His symptoms started just after he ceased one of his addictions abruptly (just a behavior that brings dopamine, not drugs or any type of substance.) I haven't watched all your videos yet, so, my opinion might be irrelevant but I just wanted to share my sight with you becase any sparkle would help people's lives.

[@Dpmanual]

@@Mamarentiana Read this, I think you'll find it helpful 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/what-causes-depersonalization-disorder/

[@diartahazrolli9411]

@@Dpmanual why i feel like i’m not smart enough to overcome this hell . I’m using SSRI but i still have DP/DR symtoms . My problem is that i just can’t stop think how i’m feeling or i just can’t stop from overanalyzing my symtoms . Can i still recover even i have this thoughts?

[@endriskyqyku7714]

CMON MOTHERFUCKERS WE GOT THIS!!! Lets do this❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

[@niy2059]

yeah!!

[@iamthefiremanjj]

Yah you do it’s crazy how common this experience is ! Even my girlfriend gets it sometimes under lots of stress

[@TheWrapAround]

going through my second bout right now, can feel it going away more and more everyday. for everyone watching it does get better, and you are perfectly normal and dpdr is normal. your brain is an amazing thing and it’s just trying to protect you.

[@user-zx8go8oz9k]

Is the second time you have dp dr?

[@TheWrapAround]

@@user-zx8go8oz9knot because it just randomly came back, because I had another panic attack and thought about it again. I went two years without it and than now i still have it. getting better everyday tho!

[@tlee62]

I’m just about to start year number of this 😢

[@simplyyyDianna]

I’m also going through my second bout. It’s been 2 months. This time I didn’t take medication and kept myself working. I was able to lower the effects of dpdr within the first month but I’m in the 2nd part where it’s just the ups and downs of recovery. The first time was October 2022 I had it for 8 months before I could start working again. After starting work it started to just be non existent. This time I started questioning my life since I was turning 25. I started to overthink and started feeling physical symptoms and eventually had a panic attack that triggered it. Before anyone freaks out about if it will come back to them… I honestly think I wasn’t truly 100% free of it the first time. I was able to live life and enjoy and feel again but I was always constantly saying like “I hope it doesn’t happen again” I intend to completely heal this time. Without the fear or worry of it coming back. And even if it does I’ll know how to handle it.

[@adentran241]

@@simplyyyDiannabro almost the same story. Healed my first time in 2 weeks (i dont know how) but then overworking caused my 2nd bout. This time I’m also questioning my life more. We got this😁

[@boo5274]

I went through DPDR for a while 5 years ago. I decided not to take medication suggested to me. And instead healed my mind with time, meditation and reduction of stress. DPDR is a trauma response to stress. Essentially it's a defence mechanism that makes you disassociate with your current (dangerous) situation (Think: you're in the jaws of a predator and you're about to die so your brain makes you take a backseat to save you from the stress and suffering). To get out of this headspace it takes time and requires you to reset your adrenal system. Once I got myself through I helped a few others get through it too (Who've all healed now too) and I always like to explain the recovery process like this: Imagine an upward trending graph. The higher highs are the days you feel normal and better again. The troughs or higher lows will throw you off, they will feel almost how it felt when you were at your lowest low, but the truth is that you're just noticing it because yesterday you were at an all time high. The mistake a lot of people make is they get stressed out more when they hit these small troughs, not realising they're in an uptrend. And because DPDR is a stress trauma response, being stressed has the opposite effect to what you want. Trust the process, Do not stress when you feel worse again just acknowledge it and tell yourself "It's fine, just a higher low.", meditate and calm your mind. That is how I got out of the DPDR cycle. It took me about 7-8 months to recover fully. Something to note, you will not notice when you've recovered, until one day you'll sit in the car or eat your lunch and realise "Oh cool, I haven't had a relapse in a while and I actually feel normal again" I wish everyone here the best, because I know how awful any form of DPDR is, but understand you can 100% recover. I've helped people who had completely resigned from trying to recover after years, and I still helped them out of the woods with the stuff I said above.

[@Dpmanual]

That's a great description of the recovery process, thanks for your comment! 😊

[@diartahazrolli9411]

Can we talk ?

[@mikkelruud2286]

Would love to hear more about your practices. Any where we can see or read more?

[@dts7824]

Thank you so much, this really helped, and the stuff you said about the peaks and troughs really hit home, because I've been feeling that, and I've been telling myself that each trough isn't generally as bad as the last. But it was nice to see someone else say the same. All the best buddy ❤

[@408DOOD]

Listen to this man, he knows what he's talking about. Speaking from experience. Trust in the process. Keep moving forward with confidence courage.

[@Dpmanual]

Thanks for your comment! 😊

[@Anthonyog5oj]

I still don’t know if this is DPDR or not and I keep desperately trying to “solve” what is wrong with me. All I know is for the last 1.5 years I have felt afraid of nearly everything. Communicating with people, going to the grocery store, moving my body in general, everything that was effortless in the past is now a huge obstacle that feels impossible to overcome. My sense of humor, joy, sadness, creativity, intuition, my sex drive, all the things the made me who I am feel like they have been stripped from me. I’m literally existing and surviving everyday hoping that I wake up and “find” myself again but it doesn’t seem like that is possible. I don’t even know what it means to be me anymore. I just know that I feel off 24/7

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

Hi Anthony, It sounds like you may be suffering with DP/DR but the best advice I can give is to just constantly keep your mind active - play games, listen to music, read books etc. Try everything you can to stop fixating your mind on how you’re feeling because thats the oxygen on which this condition exists. Do everything you normally would and you’ll see a reduction in your symptoms believe me.

[@gayeorin7036]

Just take a step one at a time , today practice talking with people even if you are afraid just do it , with the practice everyday you're gonna show your brain that talking is nothing to be afraid about and you wouldn't even notice it until you're back to your old self . Praying for your soon recovery (it sounds like dpdr to me but I'd suggest you visit a therapist to make sure)

[@dylanteet7074]

Me to man. You took the words right out of my mind. I’m struggling a lot with this. I think I have PTSD to be honest. I had a terrible reaction mixing medication off of bad judgement during a panic attack and I haven’t been right since. I’m terrified I’ll never bounce back because I can’t live like this forever or even 5 years. I feel really out of touch with reality/life.

[@dts7824]

A little bit of advice I'll add is to try and approach these thoughts with a bit of open curiosity when they arise. Try not to push them out of your mind with too much force, this just reinforces the fear associated with them. Also don't think about them when they arise. Just note the physical sensations they bring to you and just be present with them, they will pass much more quickly than if you fuel them with fearful resistance. I found that over time, this weakens the connection you have made to the thoughts, and therefore less light gets shone on them. But it does take time. You will get better buddy ❤️

[@tomr3665]

This is the perfect Chanel for you bro. Watch a couple videos and invest in the Manuel. Read it and understand it. Then move on and never search up any of this again. I was 14 when I had a really bad weed experience. After crying and constant panicking attacks every night for a few weeks wondering what is wrong with me I found this Chanel through a friend. Found out it’s common. Found out it’s natural. Found out the reason it felt like the worst thing in the world was because it’s anxiety and I was overthinking it and so on. It taught me me many lessons and I wouldn’t change it for the world . I’ve done recovery incorrect and so on and it’s taken longer than I want, but that’s part of my own individual recovery as it’s different for everyone . But I only notice it when I think about it. I continued on with my life and now I’m 16 on exchange in the other side of the world. It came back a little bit because I never really tackled it I pushed it away, and currently I’m dealing with stress and my body hasn’t completely moved on from this thought habit yet. I don’t have issues with it affecting my life anymore and I am currently changing my lifestyle to eliminate as much stress and anxiety as possible because that’s all this is. Just accept your body is healing. Distance yourself from the stress and distract your self through things you love and social activities. But acknowledge the physical feelings of it. Then you completely disassociate it from fear therefore ending the anxiety cycle. Me getting mine from a drug experience I ofcourse had very intense and worrying thoughts thinking mine could be worse . It’s not . That’s not how it works . Invest in the Manuel and then get in with your life and watch this irrelivent natural body process leave bro. I know heaps of people who have fully recovered. Everhone deals with a period of stress/anxiety in their life and it’s different for everyone, feel glad that you are getting yours done with so you now have these skills to deal with any other type of stress for the rest of your life. Change your perspective. Cant wait for your full recovery.

[@yermach6837]

This video was awesome!

[@Dpmanual]

Glad you enjoyed it! 😊

[@georgebuckley8564]

Great vid as always Shaun! Just a suggestion - maybe you could do a similar video where you interview/talk to someone who is currently going through DPDR. It could be a bit of a Q&A session, but I’m sure it would help a lot of people. Just want to say you helped me a lot through lockdown so I hope you are getting the credit you deserve 😊

[@Dpmanual]

Interesting suggestion George, I'll certainly keep that in mind for the future! And I'm delighted to hear the videos have been helpful! 😊

[@xjacob23x]

I need the book so bad but simply can’t afford it right now. Prayers for everyone going through this

[@dts7824]

Finding your website made me feel so much better in itself. But sometimes in moments of heightened anxiety, your website feels too good to be true and start questioning if it's a dream / not real. Would you say that's a common thought? It's like my brain looks for the negatives at times. When it finds comfort, there's always a doubtful side that i give too much attention to.

[@Dpmanual]

Don’t worry, existential / intrusive thoughts like that are super common with DPDR. I know they can be frustrating and frightening but they are also temporary and harmless and will fade away and stop as your recovery continues 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-fears-and-anxious-thoughts/

[@dts7824]

​@@Dpmanualthank you. I think talking about it to my wife was a big step in the right direction. I was scared to tell anyone in case they thought I was fully insane.

[@Dpmanual]

@@dts7824 Happy to help 😊 And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.

[@DanielDaBest45]

Hello brother thx for helping us. My deja vus are going but i feel weird when thinking about years and stuff. This is a part of dpdr right

[@Dpmanual]

Don’t worry, feelings of Deja Vu are super common with DPDR. I know they can be frightening but they will fade away and stop as your recovery continues 😊www.dpmanual.com/about/do-i-have-depersonalization-disorder/

[@DanielDaBest45]

@@Dpmanual thx. What about feeling weird about years

[@boo5274]

@@DanielDaBest45 Hey I had dpdr 5 years ago and any sort of time perception issues or feeling strange about "linear time" is completely normal and will also fade as you recover. :)

[@DanielDaBest45]

@@Dpmanual sorry for bothering but can also the opposite of deja vu be a sympton of dpdr. Like feeling unfamiliar with familiar places?

[@oliviairving5764]

Absolutely! This is all dpdr

[@altanilcin958]

Thank you Connor, I can say that I am 70% healed, but I have a question. I read in an article that since the brain experiences this feeling, it can get that feeling again in every moment of danger (dpdr) . Is this true?

[@Dpmanual]

Glad to hear you're doing so well -- And to answer your question, read this carefully, I think you'll find it helpful 😊www.dpmanual.com/articles/does-depersonalization-come-back/

[@ayoubimohammad6878]

Thank you sahun for doing this I have a question I’m on my way to recovery and sometimes i vape nicotine does that prevent me from recovery Should i stop vaping?

[@Dpmanual]

As long as you're not vaping weed, I wouldn't worry too much about it 😊

[@ayoubimohammad6878]

@@Dpmanualthank you so much

[@gayeorin7036]

Hello shaun !! I had been experiencing dpdr for 3 months now , I never was afraid of death and always saw it as a natural thing but now that I jave dpdr thinking about death gives me alot of anxiety, is it just dpdr or did I develop a new anxiety

[@Dpmanual]

Don’t worry, existential / intrusive thoughts like that are super common with DPDR. I know they can be frustrating and frightening but they are also temporary and harmless and will fade away and stop as your recovery continues 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-fears-and-anxious-thoughts/

[@gayeorin7036]

@@Dpmanual thank you !!! You're channel is what kept me positive and hopeful through this , hoping fir a soon recovery for me and all the dpdr sufferers ❤️❤️

[@Dpmanual]

@@gayeorin7036 Happy to help 😊

[@Zea19000]

Do i have to buy your book to recover? Or have you uploaded a video where you explain how to recover?

[@user-ir9ip3zz1j]

He has videos all over his channel of numerous people who’ve recovered, but if you cannot afford the book, then my advice is to drive yourself away from those anxious thoughts, especially the habit of thinking about DPDR. Get yourself a new hobby like meditation or working out; these things will help you over time, and you won’t know when you’ve recovered, so there’s no point in obsessing over it. Also, if you are addicted to anything like alcohol or caffeine, I suggest trying to quit or at least reduce the amount you take in. That way, you can focus (distract your mind) on something else and also provide your body and mind with a benefit (a win-win situation). It takes time and I’m dealing with the same problem myself but I’ve gotten better overtime! To the road of recovery my friend, we’ve got this!❤

[@XHEADTOWALLX]

I'm hoping for some medication free recovery stories soon

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

Hi, theres plenty on the channel. I took it but without putting in the work you wont recover, it just makes it SLIGHTLY easier. It’s not for everyone and not everyone needs it, I personally just found it helped give me a boost to make the steps to recovery.

[@Dpmanual]

There's lots of people on the channel who have recovered with and without medication: www.dpmanual.com/dpdr-recovery-interviews/ Read this too, I think you'll find it helpful: www.dpmanual.com/articles/can-medication-cure-depersonalization/ And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.

[@nakiyajolene]

i’ve had dpdr since early october this is my second experience with it and the first one only lasted a week so with this new wave lasting over 2 months and a half has been super terrifying, i noticed the past couple days i been feeling like my mind can’t connect to the present and i have been reliving past feelings, it’s hard to explain but i wanted to know if that feeling is normal or not? i’ve also been sick while experiencing this new symptom

[@dawnbreaker3712]

Yes we are the same, mine also im feeling like reliving the past when i din’t have dpdr and can’t connect to the present but the only difference my dpdr is still on going for over 4years all i can say is what your feeling is the same as mine, and goodluck to our recovery, that’s all and as always there’s a way out on every problem may God bless us both and the people suffering from Dpdr.

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

Hi Nakiya, Its a totally normal symptom to not feel connected to the present. Just try not to focus on that feeling. Live your life totally as normal and try to disregard the thoughts and feelings.

[@smhg5665]

Hello Shaun, for 6-7 months, I haven't felt normal, so I don't remember what normal feels like. I'm taking steps to recover, and I feel like I'm getting a bit closer to normal. I don't know why, but when this happens, I strangely panic. I guess it might be because I haven't felt normal for a long time.Is this a normal situation? I hope I've been able to explain; my English is not very proficient. 😥

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

This is normal as you have the state-specific memory of feeling anxious. It’s actually pretty common for people who have been in heightened states of anxiety for prolonged periods to feel slight anxiety whenever they begin to feel normal but don’t worry, this means you’re on the right track.

[@silas9290]

Hey Shaun I love your videos but I cant find anyone that has Existential thoughts about their own identity? Not about the world and the galaxy but about myself?

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

I had these thoughts too - Its hard to remember all of the existential thoughts because there were just so many. Please don’t worry yourself with these, these will go as the underlying issue (anxiety) fades - remember, DPDR is a SYMPTOM of anxiety & existential thoughts etc are sub-SYMPTOMS of DPDR. They are all just anxiety based.

[@silas9290]

@@kurtisgillespie5115 thank u so much for responding :)

[@diartahazrolli9411]

Yes i can’t remember too about myself and my identity i don’t feel like myself anymore because of DP this happens to all so don’t worry . We are not connected to ourselfs

[@emmaglentworth4738]

I also have this, it's all focused on myself and my own being who I am, like I've completely lost all sense of who or what I am.. you're not alone.

[@user-zx8go8oz9k]

hey shaun I had dpdr because of weed and now when my friends smoke I always move away and if I smell the smell it always makes me a little anxious because I'm afraid it might hurt me for my dpdr, I read on google that it can't do anything to you, that passive smoking could never get you high unless you're in an indoor room without ventilation and even there the effects would be minimal, but I still have this fixation, I wanted to ask you for some advice plsss.

[@user-zx8go8oz9k]

Can you plss answer me ??

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

Hi mate - Don’t worry, you will not, I repeat NOT get high through passive smoke. If it is a trigger of anxiety for you then steer clear from it but if you are around your friends and they are smoking, do not worry, you won’t get high.

[@user-zx8go8oz9k]

@@kurtisgillespie5115 thank you veryyy much, so I can be close to my friends even when they smoke in closed places it can't make my dpdr worse? 

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

If the smell itself is a trigger then I’d advise staying away but if that isn’t a trigger for you then yes absolutely you can be around them.

[@user-zx8go8oz9k]

@@kurtisgillespie5115 thanks for the answering,I don't know but in closed places it happened to me before I had a bit of panic, also because I don't know why I didn't have much saliva and I was afraid that I felt stoned

[@fkthesystem1129]

Hi im having panic attacks but with no racing heart rate or physical symptoms....just strong panic fear and mental symptoms along with feeling like loosing control and strong panic and fear and thoughts like when travelling i feel like im stuck and not going to get home ... is this related to DP ? As iv been told these are DP panic attacks? Is this correct ? Can you provide Any help on this please ?

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

Yes this *could* be DPDR or just Generalised Anxiety Disorder, not everyone’s symptoms will be as strong as others with DPDR. However, don’t get hung up on what it may or may not be, just try to live your life as normal and disregard these thoughts. When you feel yourself thinking this way, realise it, reward yourself for catching the thought in its tracks, change that thought into something better and make it bigger & brighter than anything. Use your imagination, the mind is powerful.

[@fkthesystem1129]

@kurtisgillespie5115 thanks 4 the reply il try that scary stuff it all is... feel like im loosing the plot

[@TwoWheelsWorld00]

please make a video on when we recover from dpdr, then again smoking weed is normal or not?

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

Your life goes back to normal when you recover, that means you can do whatever you want to do. That being said, people who have developed DPDR have trained themselves to have catastrophic thinking which isnt always the best recipe when smoking weed. It’s up to the individual however.

[@TwoWheelsWorld00]

@@kurtisgillespie5115 You're absolutely right brother ❤️❤️

[@iamthefiremanjj]

How often do you find people having food sensitivities while dealing with this . I have pretty much recovered from anxiety etc but sometimes after eating I get that brain fog dp feeling

[@Dpmanual]

Hi, thanks for your comment 😊 Remember that ultimately, DPDR is just a symptom of anxiety so when the symptoms vary, it's just your anxiety levels going up and down, and certain situations / environments (i.e., food sensitivity) can change them. I know it might seem difficult to believe but you actually have complete control over it 😊 Make sure to read through all the info and articles on my website, starting with this one: www.dpmanual.com/about/depersonalization-definition-what-is-it/

[@iamthefiremanjj]

@@Dpmanual bet damn thanks man didn’t think you would respond that fast

[@iamthefiremanjj]

@@Dpmanual yah it course I have your book :)

[@dimetrodon2250]

I’m scared of possibly turning one of my special interests into a trigger for anxiety. The sort of “wrongness” blanketing most of my interests doesn’t feel as bad, but for one of them, it feels like I’m never getting that interest back no matter what. I do t know if I convinced myself it’s gone, or caused it to become a trigger for anxiety, or if it’s just anhedonia affecting things differently, but it feels like I can no longer enjoy this interest which is what pulled me out of my first bout back in 2020. Like even looking at something that reminds me of it is now giving me anxiety. How do I undo this tangled mess of garbage in my brain? How do I go back to enjoying the content that I love. I know I’m supposed to enjoy this. I know I loved this. It was may favorite thing for like 3 whole years until I suddenly got hit by DPDR again. I feel like my natural intrest in stuff, my personality, my confidence, my emotional responses and empathetic connections, my sense of humor, the things I relate to, my special interests, my obsessions and hyperfixations, my intelligence and cognition, my spatial awareness, even my senses. it all feels… wrong. Sometimes I feel exactly what you describe as DPDR, other times I feel like there’s something else completely wrong with me. Like is this truly just the result of anxiety after taking cold medicine and my ADHD/Autism meds at the same time after not sleeping the night before? Will I ever feel “regular” again? Truly? I don’t know if I came out “the same” last time, and I do t want to lose what made me me, especially something that I held very near and dear to my heart. I can’t bear to not be interested in something that usually gives me comfort, to be driven away from a community where I felt like I belonged because of some bizarre anxiousness. To feel like it was never real to begin with. I don’t want that. I just want to snap back to who I was before all of this. To be the confident, autistic, ADHD, smart, sci-fi and fantasy loving, opinionated, nature and science obsessed, artistically interested, sex positive, gaming enjoying, and passionate person I was before, with my sense of humor back.

[@user-ir9ip3zz1j]

You'll get there, bud. Just understand that this is only temporary and it cannot hurt you. Note that if you got out of it once, you can get out of it again. I personally am dealing with DPDR just as you are, and I understand how painful it is to worry constantly about this situation. But the truth is, it's your responsibility to get away from those thoughts about DPDR and let it fade over time. Obsession is the reason you and I still have such a problem, but it can be fixed.

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

Hi mate, I will be totally straight with you - YOU are creating this. Remember, anxiety does not HAPPEN to you, it does not exist like an airborne disease (flu), it is all created BY you. This means you can absolutely 100% A) get out of it and B) change the way you think about things. That includes the way you perceive this activity you refer to that makes you create anxiety. This particular activity did nothing out of the ordinary in order to ‘give’ you anxiety, that is simply not possible. It is the way in which you processed it and continue to process it is what is giving you anxiety. There is no part of your brain that is ‘broken’ or ‘unfixable’, physically you are the same person as before. All you need to do is work very hard on changing your thought patterns, creating self belief, understanding that YOU truly have power and control over every single thought that you have. You got this, you can and will recover. Remember it’s never a smooth curve, there will be good days and bad days but this is NOT I repeat NOT some terminal, life long mental health condition. This isn’t even a condition. All it is in truth is a habit of negative, helpless and hypervigilant thought patterns. You got this my friend.

[@JAN0123789]

Ive been struggling with dp for a few months now, but i made a lot of progress since I found Shauns manual last week. I know now this is most likely the dp talking, but even though im starting to move away from the scary existential thoughts, I still feel constantly like: none of this makes sense. It cant be real. Floating on a rock in infinite space etcetera. That makes me worried, becaude it feels like my brain is starting to accept the nonsense thought that 'all of this is most likely not real' Also im a bit worried that - when it gets better - im not able to forget how 'not real' everything felt, and that my brain cant go back to accepting that everything in fact is very real. Does this sounds familier of anybody?

[@mangdeezy8355]

Yeah man trust this definitely apart of the process of recovery. Ofc ur when things in ur mind start to quiet down u start getting the thoughts of like “Oh no this is just me getting use to the feeling”. This is 100% just the anxiety talking it still lingers a little bit in recovery the only thing to do is block out these thoughts and trade it with stuff that makes u distracted and makes u happy!

[@user-rf8ku1ku6n]

I'm going through my second bout of DPDR and it feels different from the last time in a scary way, I'm struggling to look in the mirror it's like logically I know it's me but I'm not getting the same feeling when I useally look at myself, especially if I look myself in the eyes , the way I think doesn't feel like me and I feel so slow, like I can't think properly, I am useally hyper focusing, go go go, get things done now I feel barely like a person.

[@Dpmanual]

Don’t worry, feelings like that are super common with DPDR. I know they can be frustrating but they will fade away and stop as you recover 😊 www.dpmanual.com/about/do-i-have-depersonalization-disorder/ And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.

[@karunago9882]

​@@Dpmanual​@ you forgot to mention mirror thing in the article

[@Dpmanual]

@@karunago9882 No, it's in there 😊 www.dpmanual.com/about/do-i-have-depersonalization-disorder/

[@user-sy1hh8dd4f]

why my head scared my? i have strange fears. why i dont know if i have vision or no?

[@Wolskyyy]

Is it normal for it to be almost gone for a few days and being basically back to normal and have it spring back and be really bad for a few weeks? I’ve been having that the last 6 months

[@Dpmanual]

Hi, thanks for your comment 😊 Remember that ultimately, DPDR is just a symptom of anxiety so when the symptoms vary, it's just your anxiety levels going up and down, and certain situations / environments can change them. I know it might seem difficult to believe but you actually have complete control over it 😊 Make sure to read through all the info and articles on my website, starting with this one: www.dpmanual.com/about/depersonalization-definition-what-is-it/

[@boo5274]

Hey, read my comment it might help :)

[@mikebeastgaming1562trust]

Im just so scared I have a serious condition like psychosis or something and it’s not DP/DR. It makes me so overwhelmingly anxious and panicked.

[@Dpmanual]

Read these articles carefully, I think you'll find them helpful 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/schizophrenia_cancer_depersonalization/ www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-three-reasons-youre-not-going-crazy-2/ And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.

[@OomyZoomy]

Been almost two years still ain’t normal I hate driving at night 😭

[@Dpmanual]

Don't worry, it doesn't matter what caused it, how long it’s lasted, or whether it’s been 24/7 or episodic, you can always switch DPDR off completely by stopping the anxiety that's causing it 😊 And in terms of driving, read this, I think you'll find it very useful: www.dpmanual.com/articles/should-you-drive-with-depersonalization/

[@boo5274]

Hey read my comment it might help :)

[@user-ir9ip3zz1j]

Think of anxiety as a thin piece of thread tied around you, disguised as a chain (DPDR) Once you face the anxiety, over time, you’ll realize it wasn’t as bad as you thought it would be, and you’re completely unharmed. Practice new hobbies or learn to overcome these false fears, and over time, you’ll recover. Do note that obsessing over the DPDR will nullify/slow down recovery, so love your life and face its challenges just as we're intended to. And you will earn your reward. Success doesn’t come without patience and a bit of suffering. You’ll learn that nothing was truly wrong and realize you’re okay. The true goal is forget you have it at all and overtime you’ll return to your “normal” self (nothing is wrong with you you’re just going through a tough time)❤

[@diartahazrolli9411]

Will we know when we get back to normal ?

[@Dpmanual]

Yep, read this 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/what-does-depersonalization-recovery-feel-like/

[@danyunginn]

Can I buy the book in United States english

[@Dpmanual]

Sure! 😊 You can purchase and download the DP Manual package here: www.dpmanual.com/purchase/

[@sarahk7046]

Ich habe das Handbuch nun auch bereits 4 mal gelesen. Leider veränderten sich die Symptome nur und nun frage ich mich jeden Tag… Was bin ich? Wer bin ich? Wer ist das ich? Ich denke über alles nach und fühle mich oft gespalten, Wenn ich über mich selbst rede. Ich war früher gern mal allein aber jetzt frage ich mich worüber ich damals nachgedacht habe. Es ist schwer zu beschreiben.

[@jacklepino7805]

Hey Sarah, mein Tipp wäre nur für die bisherige Zeit diese Gedanken einfach ruhen zu lassen und stattdessen zu versuchen dich wie im Manual beschrieben wirklich mit anderen Dingen zu brschäftigen. Ein Instrument oder eine Sprache lernen, ein gutes Buch lesen, Sport machen etc. Je mehr dich die Tätigkeit in Anspruch nimmt und ablenkt desto besser. Dein Gehirn wird dadurch immer mehr lernen und merken, dass es dir gut geht, das du in Sicherheit bist und das es keinen Grund hat Angst zu haben. Das dauert aber, also hab Geduld! Vertrau darauf, dass wieder alles normal wird. Was deine "Wer bin ich, was bin ich" Fragen angeht, so würde ich dich daran erinnern, dass diese Fragen für dich gerade nur relevant sind, weil deine Angst sich an sie geklammert hat. Sie sind nur ein Ausdruck deiner Angst, mehr nicht. Sie haben absolut keine Relevanz. Also musst du dich auch nicht mit ihnen Beschäftigen. Du kannst sie einfach unbeantwortet lassen. Deswegen ist das allein sein auch gerade eher suboptimal - du willst dich ja ablenken und nicht auf deinen inneren Angstmonolog konzentrieren. Ich hoffe das hilft dir weiter.

[@sarahk7046]

Wow, vielen Dank ❤️

[@dts7824]

​@@jacklepino7805I love how much everyone supports each other. It makes me so happy to see this. Thank you for being such a good person ❤️

[@jaayrepzz]

I'm 15 and have been going through depersonalization for a minute do I have scritzphenia I'm really scared of what im going through

[@Dpmanual]

Hey, thanks for your comment. Firstly, please make sure that you’re speaking to your parents about what’s happening. It’s very important that they know what’s going on. Secondly, I know DPDR can be frightening but remember that it's just your body and brain's natural response to stress and anxiety. It's not permanent and it can't hurt you. You can and will recover. Make sure to read through all the info and articles on my website at www.dpmanual.com And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR 👍

[@Kunal.keshrii]

I was made recovery about 50℅ but again i comeback to my home and again afraid of going outside and when i go i feel dizzy and nervous so i comeback to home suddenly what do i do now? am i develop agarophobia? Please answer🙏

[@Dpmanual]

Don't worry, temporary setbacks like that are very common on the road to recovery. Read this: www.dpmanual.com/articles/what-does-depersonalization-recovery-feel-like/

[@Kunal.keshrii]

@@Dpmanual so what do i do now? When i step out from my house my body feel like shakiness and fear like what if i fall or dizzy?? So please suggest how to overcome this?🙏

[@Dpmanual]

@@Kunal.keshrii Head over to my website at www.dpmanual.com, there’s tons of info and tips on DPDR recovery there 😊 And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.

[@Kunal.keshrii]

@@Dpmanual I have bought your manual 4-5 months ago but I am just asking for satisfaction whether all these problems are normal or not ??Because no anxiety specialist is available around my house. So please answer me🙏🙏

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

These problems are TOTALLY normal of a typical DPDR sufferer and are things that I too experienced. You can and most importantly WILL recover by implementing the steps in the manual, just remember not to put a time frame on recovery :)

[@ulisesgarcia534]

I sent you an email I’m not sure if you received it or not would love to hear back from you Shaun ❤

[@jackw6660]

I got to the point where I feel I was 90% healed for like a month and I had a setback and now it’s fully back. Is this normal

[@Dpmanual]

Don't worry, temporary setbacks like that are very common on the road to recovery 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/what-does-depersonalization-recovery-feel-like/

[@HappyHealthyU-cv3dm]

can u make a video with reasons why you dont have a brain tumor for people like me that think we have it with depersonalization

[@Dpmanual]

The symptoms of having a brain tumour are quite different to those of any anxiety-based condition: www.nhs.uk/conditions/brain-tumours/ www.dpmanual.com/about/depersonalization-symptoms-the-10-most-common/ And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.

[@neo23thirty-eight]

FYI ssri’s have (real) risk of mania which should not be taken lightly..

[@dylanteet7074]

What if this was triggered by psychosis from a weed and medication mixture while trying to treat a panic attack? I feel like my anxiety is so deep rooted from that experience there is some trauma mixed in with it. It was terrifying as I didn’t know who I was for a month straight and my mind was trying to convince me that I’m someone I’m not. Was only sleeping 1 hour a day. I was losing my mind. It was a horrific experience. So much regret I did that. Im still almost in a confusion from it. It’s been 4 months. I’m struggling really bad everyday. Very small problems set me off into a bad mental state and panic. My nervous system feels completely shot. My emotions are not stable in response to stress and people. I’m scared for my life. Can I still recover? I don’t want to be on hard medication considering I never needed it before this experience.

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

All DPDR is the SAME, no matter how you get it. Your anxiety is just convincing you that you have something else wrong. Believe me there’s nothing more sinister going on. Begin to implement steps to recovery and you will start to feel better :)

[@dylanteet7074]

@@kurtisgillespie5115 I appreciate it I’m trying. I just don’t feel good at all. Like when you feel physically sick from the flu, my mind feels physically sick and I can barley do anything now. Its scary. Everything is so overwhelming it’s hard to want to be here anymore if my next 40-50 years will be nothing but suffering and severe depression. There isn’t one thing in the world that gets my mind off of the negativity. I never used to be like that until this happened.

[@iamthefiremanjj]

Focus on doing everything you can to recover instead of trying to figure out what’s wrong with you . That helped me

[@freeviebee]

This sounds like super bad anxiety and intrusive thoughts so basically when all your random thoughts (we have about 80k each day) scare you. So you might think “I am a blonde woman” even though you’re a man. Or whatever. And then you link this strong emotion to psychosis or losing who you are. Once your anxiety subsides, I promise you - you will be back to 100% normal. It won’t take 50 years. Just a couple of weeks - months. Your body is under so much adrenaline that everything scares you now. Once that’s gone, you’ll feel fine again. And the crazy thing is: you won’t even remember exactly how bad things were. Don’t loose hope. It’s all gonna be fine.

[@fifiearthwanderer]

I second what everyone is saying here. I literally was in the same place as you last summer. It was so bad that i got hospitalized. My nervous system is still rebuilding its sense of self and safety. What helped me was grounding tools. And focusing on something other than all the scary symptoms. Remind yourself they are normal and be curious about them and doing inner child self care helped too to help calm me. Its a process but it does pass. At first what helped me change my focus was to start a new hobby. I started fishing and it helped me get into nature and also focus on the fishing not my symptoms

[@theme5489]

is it possible that when you recover, that it can happen again while recovering?

[@Dpmanual]

Read this: www.dpmanual.com/articles/does-depersonalization-come-back/ and watch this: kzbin.info/www/bejne/eGXYmph6qrmljqc I think you'll find them helpful 😊

[@theme5489]

@@Dpmanual Wow okay that helped allot! so i take it that dp/dr does go away eventually if you understand what its all about right?

[@Dpmanual]

@@theme5489 Yep, it goes away, and you can and will get 100% back to normal 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/back-to-normal-after-depersonalization/

[@lejlaselmanovic]

is it normal to have thoughts like: "why am I living if I'm going to die" "what is the purpose of everything" etc

[@Dpmanual]

Don’t worry, existential / intrusive thoughts like that are super common with DPDR. I know they can be frustrating and frightening but they are also temporary and harmless and will fade away and stop as your recovery continues 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-fears-and-anxious-thoughts/

[@lejlaselmanovic]

@@Dpmanual I have one more question, can we feel as if we are not there even in our own house? and that the house looks like it is not ours

[@lejlaselmanovic]

did you take medicine?

[@Dpmanual]

I'm not a medical professional so can't give you specific recommendations re medication. But please read this article, I think you'll find it useful: www.dpmanual.com/articles/can-medication-cure-depersonalization/

[@_.idealistqueen.]

Can depersonalization/derealization cause sleep paralysis and skin problems

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

Considering DPDR is a SYMPTOM of anxiety, yes anxiety can cause skin issues. When anxious/stressed your body produces histamine aka the allergy chemical. This can cause skin issues but don’t worry - this isn’t permanent.

[@user-jj3qb8cr8m]

ქართულად რომ დადოთ? გთხოვთ.

[@danyunginn]

Is It Normal that I’m watching myself like a movie and scared I’m lose my mind and memory and I got it from magic mushrooms and weed use and it doesn’t feel like I’m doing of this and feel like I’m losing my senses and blurry vision sometimes and night time I go to sleep it’s like I don’t know when I go to sleep I just go and when I wake it it feels like I was still in my dream like I don’t really know if things was my dream or not sometime I overthink and I start losing memory for 2 Secs then I’ll get it back I don’t know it’s a weird symptom it feels like things around happen and I see it before but I did not In the present it feel like I disconnect from the old me God Please Whoever Reading This please let me know it’s a normal and in it’s a way out healing for this I ain’t been the same sense April I tired of thinking and anxiety and stress over this everyday my dreams be nightmares I been thinking I doing something weird and bad in my dreams but I be thinking it real life but it really just be my dreams of me overthinking and stress and anxiety I don’t be feeling like getting out the bad in the morning I feel tired and sleepy and weak🖤🙏🏾🙏🏾

[@Dpmanual]

Don’t worry, feelings like that are super common with DPDR. I know they can be frustrating but they will fade away and stop as you recover 😊 www.dpmanual.com/about/do-i-have-depersonalization-disorder/ And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.

[@erickrodrig.z7101]

I cant remember my past and aphantasia is despersonalization?

[@Dpmanual]

Read this, I think you'll find it helpful 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-and-memory-loss/

[@erickrodrig.z7101]

@@Dpmanual I really cant remember the moments with my family and i accquire aphantasia this is symptom? Long therm

[@Dpmanual]

@@erickrodrig.z7101 Hi Erick, read this: www.dpmanual.com/articles/the-truth-about-blank-mind-syndrome/ And again, if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR.

[@user-fv8gr9ki3z]

Hello Shaun can you please get back to me I’ve been having existential thoughts and thinking I’m living in a dream or like if nothing is real and is all in my head I’ve got this from my first time smoking weed and I’m afraid I’m schizophrenic or something bad please if you respond I will really appreciate it

[@Dpmanual]

Don’t worry Sebastian, existential / intrusive thoughts like that are super common with DPDR. I know they can be frustrating and frightening but they are also temporary and harmless and will fade away and stop as your recovery continues 😊 www.dpmanual.com/articles/depersonalization-fears-and-anxious-thoughts/

[@fatjarvis6050]

Help me please 😭😭😭😭 dpr is killing me 😭😭😭😭😭 I don't want my life end here 😭😭😭 please someone help me 😭😭😭😭

[@Dpmanual]

Hello -- I know DPDR can be scary but just remember that it’s a natural reaction to stress and anxiety, and people experience it all the time. The National Institute on Mental Illness estimates that up to 75% of people experience at least one depersonalization / derealization episode in their lives. It's part of your brain's natural defence mechanism and usually it only lasts a few seconds or minutes at a time. It's only when it's focused on as a separate problem (feeling like you're going crazy / in a dream etc) that it can turn into a feedback loop with the anxiety that caused it in the first place. But no matter what caused it or how long you've had it, you can always switch it off completely by stopping that anxious feedback loop. Make sure to carefully read through all the articles and info on my website at www.dpmanual.com and my book The Depersonalization Manual. And if you would like to speak to a medical professional please don't hesitate to do so. I would recommend finding an anxiety specialist if possible as they will likely be more familiar with DPDR 👍

[@LarrySwishamane]

Anybody else’s bad weed experience was so&so sold u some Angel Dust?

[@boo5274]

Hey! I left a comment that might help you. I actually got DPDR from exactly this 5 years ago. PCP mixed into weed without me knowing and had a pretty rough night with it.

[@willbale]

why does it look like he's reading from a script?

[@kurtisgillespie5115]

I was reading from my phone on the advice section beginning 38:40 😂👍 I wanted to remember everything I felt necessary to say

[@Userr368]

Is he high in this video