Ep. 58 | 2 Bears 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

  Рет қаралды 1,179,297

YMH Studios

YMH Studios

Күн бұрын

Пікірлер: 2 400
@pablorodriguez4765
@pablorodriguez4765 4 жыл бұрын
"Dude look at me I'm fit as a fiddle... I'm the fattest I've ever been" -Brent Crystals
@EternalResonance
@EternalResonance 4 жыл бұрын
Burt your problem is no one can tell you stop. you parents probably didn't limit your wants and might be the same now. your parents got you an easy job and payed you to do nothing as a job. easy childhood. you didn't even have to worry about doing well in college. everything was handed to you
@Habdabi
@Habdabi 4 жыл бұрын
His name is actually "Benzo Brent" 💊💊💊😂😂😂😂😂
@LizardDude
@LizardDude 4 жыл бұрын
Both can be true when you're the Alex Jones of fitness.
@parkerb9010
@parkerb9010 4 жыл бұрын
I think we should call him "Burnt Krystals" because you know his fat ass would still eat a thousand of those nasty things.
@rancidrylan5460
@rancidrylan5460 4 жыл бұрын
@@EternalResonance he's the CEO of white privilege
@MartinKipowski
@MartinKipowski 4 жыл бұрын
"Women give the worst presents. Fucking socks!" "Feetures, the perfect gift for a loved one!"
@Bigpunz67
@Bigpunz67 4 жыл бұрын
Brett: “I don’t know why people are concerned about my health” Also Barff: almost passes out every episode
@Habdabi
@Habdabi 4 жыл бұрын
Also Benzo Brett is hardcore addicted to benzos like xanax and others 💊💊💊
@topher3178
@topher3178 4 жыл бұрын
@@Habdabi it’s so sad that he has to take Benzos so he won’t indulge in food at night ...
@chrisbuehler6868
@chrisbuehler6868 4 жыл бұрын
@@topher3178 he just doesn't remember that he pigged out cause he's in a benzo blackout
@XenoTravis
@XenoTravis 4 жыл бұрын
@@Habdabi hasn't he said many times he will smoke/drink then take xanax at night? I wouldn't be surprised if he has to buy it illegally.
@ahernandez223
@ahernandez223 4 жыл бұрын
😂
@Scrapcitybjj
@Scrapcitybjj 4 жыл бұрын
Brent : “Im fatter than ive ever been” Brent : “woop like a personal trainer on your wrist”
@spLiffyFOUR20
@spLiffyFOUR20 4 жыл бұрын
Lol right, how do you have a sponsor like woop and get fatter? They're going to drop them lol
@lassorbrandon
@lassorbrandon 4 жыл бұрын
And I hate dumb gifts. Also: Buy feetures socks- they make great gifts!
@kaidenhall3223
@kaidenhall3223 4 жыл бұрын
And I’d fuck him...? What.. the... fuck... Burt...
@bryanbarefoot7920
@bryanbarefoot7920 2 жыл бұрын
It’s insane a fitness company would look at Bart and say yeah we want people to think he looks like that because of our product that’ll have em running to order from us. Whoever reached out to them needs to be fired lol
@davidhoffman3363
@davidhoffman3363 4 жыл бұрын
Bert: “OMG he looks like Sylvester Stallone there!” Tom: “That is Sylvester Stallone.”
@mastergwaha
@mastergwaha 2 жыл бұрын
Sly got'em again!
@dolan979
@dolan979 4 жыл бұрын
"Have we ever fought Yemen?" "We bombed them" "Thats a win"
@ctdieselnut
@ctdieselnut 4 жыл бұрын
America, fuck yea!
@wisterV
@wisterV 4 жыл бұрын
Yemeni Wedding party 🎯
@sgswaney
@sgswaney 4 жыл бұрын
Bert is making the case for school choice.
@drbrontosaurus
@drbrontosaurus 4 жыл бұрын
@@sgswaney Also Pro-choice.
@VideoNozoki
@VideoNozoki 4 жыл бұрын
Bert is making the case that you don't need to keep all your children. Sparta: throw the weak off the cliff and let nature sort them out.
@atisp.9976
@atisp.9976 4 жыл бұрын
We should really start appreciating every new episode, as it truly looks like every episode could be the last one Brent does..
@BaysideShrimp
@BaysideShrimp 4 жыл бұрын
So fat and red.
@idab6864
@idab6864 4 жыл бұрын
I could see Bert dying of a heart attack before joey diaz dies of anything
@josephm2354
@josephm2354 4 жыл бұрын
Ron's the bus driver and Bert's the slave driver
@mrs.h2725
@mrs.h2725 4 жыл бұрын
Anyone notice the fat deposits behind his eyes increasing? The bulging is a dead giveaway of out of control blood pressure and overloading on saturated and trans fats.
@chain-wallet
@chain-wallet 4 жыл бұрын
worlds deadest comic
@tonydyson3492
@tonydyson3492 4 жыл бұрын
When Tom does the ads... It looks like you just walked in on a psychopath dismembering someone and then trying to convince you that he’s a good guy.
@tonydyson3492
@tonydyson3492 4 жыл бұрын
@skittzo 916 damn... I’ve been outed
@janpavel1441
@janpavel1441 4 жыл бұрын
like bill burr always says, it takes a psycho to spot a psycho
@peepeepoopoo1042
@peepeepoopoo1042 4 жыл бұрын
This should be top comment
@karandas1360
@karandas1360 4 жыл бұрын
The Bell’s palsy part where Bert goes “George Clooney! *gasp* it can get any of us” had me dying
@kevin.astor1
@kevin.astor1 4 жыл бұрын
You can always count on Burnt to describe how healthy he has eaten, how much he exercised and then IMMEDIATELY "But then I drank 4 double Tito's , 3 bottles of wine and ate 7 slices of leftover pizza." to make you feel like you have all of your life under control.
@crayonwriter
@crayonwriter 3 жыл бұрын
🤣🤣 lmao... Exactly exactly!!
@crobar_
@crobar_ 4 жыл бұрын
Hearing the guys down the hall erupt into laughter in the background is the funniest shit. One of the best parts of this podcast and ymh.
@sydneyvasquez7250
@sydneyvasquez7250 3 жыл бұрын
agreed
@bryanbarefoot7920
@bryanbarefoot7920 2 жыл бұрын
They swear it’s not a laugh track but man I’ve listened long enough and swear that it is. It’s always the same exact laugh for the same amount of time lmao
@Doc_Hawk
@Doc_Hawk 2 жыл бұрын
@@bryanbarefoot7920 im in the same boat, I want to believe but it totally sounds like a laugh track
@chrisv9000
@chrisv9000 4 жыл бұрын
Bert: “It was 3 on 1 though. That’s not a win” Also Bert: “We dropped a bomb? Yeah we’ll count that”
@JakeFennimore
@JakeFennimore 4 жыл бұрын
“I’m obsessed with Latino dudes getting haircuts right now” -Brent Carshner
@petertosh9782
@petertosh9782 4 жыл бұрын
The most racist man to ever live
@jobomeful
@jobomeful 4 жыл бұрын
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@timharper3390
@timharper3390 4 жыл бұрын
And By The Way- what is he not obsessed about?
@Knox-rox
@Knox-rox 4 жыл бұрын
"I'm obsessed with latin dudes getting haircuts right now" -Brent Krystals
@alexmurphy7472
@alexmurphy7472 4 жыл бұрын
Bert doesn't have a problem, he's only an alcoholic when he drinks
@absent6076
@absent6076 4 жыл бұрын
This caught me off guard good shxt
@waterflyer123
@waterflyer123 4 жыл бұрын
Who is bert?
@Bigpunz67
@Bigpunz67 4 жыл бұрын
Do you mean Bart?
@brandon4391
@brandon4391 4 жыл бұрын
Bernie macdonalds himself
@jf3130
@jf3130 4 жыл бұрын
That's called addictive personality. I think. People that can abstain but when they have it, they go all in. Lotta comedians stopped drugs bcos of that.
@NiuHuskie2519
@NiuHuskie2519 4 жыл бұрын
Brett is talking so fast it sounds like his tongue is trying to escape his mouth because it smells so bad in there
@StephenKyle91
@StephenKyle91 4 жыл бұрын
Almost like his tongue got caught on the back of his teeth
@LpJunior537
@LpJunior537 4 жыл бұрын
@@StephenKyle91 he couldn't see what he was saying
@bigdannysmokez1374
@bigdannysmokez1374 4 жыл бұрын
@@StephenKyle91 lol
@LiLKK713PB
@LiLKK713PB 4 жыл бұрын
So funny!!! Holy shit!!!!
@AlphabyteMusic
@AlphabyteMusic 4 жыл бұрын
That N word joke Bert made in the beginning was priceless
@VideoNozoki
@VideoNozoki 4 жыл бұрын
Do you know how many times he's told that joke!
@aleccraig7283
@aleccraig7283 4 жыл бұрын
Which one?
@Andreas_linden
@Andreas_linden 4 жыл бұрын
Litle bit racist...But funny!
@dontclick7332
@dontclick7332 4 жыл бұрын
It was so funny good thing I heard it before they edited it out Bert really hits the “ER” hard
@ModeratelyAmused
@ModeratelyAmused 4 жыл бұрын
@Semper Fortis you are trying too hard telling the same joke in two threads.
@danp988
@danp988 4 жыл бұрын
How is Bert so unaware of ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING?!
@utlonghorn86
@utlonghorn86 4 жыл бұрын
Narcissism
@MultiDevilmaster
@MultiDevilmaster 4 жыл бұрын
@@utlonghorn86 You are making a statement while not having an actual clue about what you are talking about
@Mr_Jish
@Mr_Jish 4 жыл бұрын
@@MultiDevilmaster If you don't think Barf at the very least has narcissistic tendencies, you might want to get checked out for being delusional yourself chief 😂
@MultiDevilmaster
@MultiDevilmaster 4 жыл бұрын
@@Mr_Jish Narcissistic tendencies are not Narcissism. Psychological topics are way to deep to be diagnosed by a dude in the comments of a youtube video. Ok he has tendencies, but only a professional psychologist can say whats really going on.
@rhpslover1220
@rhpslover1220 4 жыл бұрын
"Im as fit as a fiddle....im the fattest Ive ever been right now" Same. Same.
@TruthIsTheNewHate84
@TruthIsTheNewHate84 4 жыл бұрын
If that profile pic is of you recently you dont look fat.
@rhpslover1220
@rhpslover1220 4 жыл бұрын
Lol thanks. But ya cant see my gut in the pic!
@TruthIsTheNewHate84
@TruthIsTheNewHate84 4 жыл бұрын
@@rhpslover1220 lol. Maybe its the quarentine stuff. Everyone i know has gained weight durring quarentine except me. I really need to gain some weight.
@theonetheycallfear8237
@theonetheycallfear8237 4 жыл бұрын
Tom’s facial expression when Bert is straight up lying through his teeth is gold
@avonbarksdale3839
@avonbarksdale3839 4 жыл бұрын
which part ?
@IvanTheUnholy
@IvanTheUnholy 4 жыл бұрын
@@avonbarksdale3839 Any part ever.
@sneakattack5354
@sneakattack5354 4 жыл бұрын
How many people gonna watch this instead of JRE?
@zlatkoigric5084
@zlatkoigric5084 3 жыл бұрын
@@sneakattack5354 have not listent/watch j.rogaine for some time.it iz personal.it iz what it iz.
@SheerRox
@SheerRox 4 жыл бұрын
Bert even says his name with a hard "R"
@thisTofu
@thisTofu 4 жыл бұрын
bert is the word
@colina1330
@colina1330 4 жыл бұрын
Liam doesn't, though.
@gradzelli
@gradzelli 4 жыл бұрын
That's a good way to introduce him: Bert, with a hard 'R'.
@atyusriggins3824
@atyusriggins3824 4 жыл бұрын
Damn😂
@StephenKyle91
@StephenKyle91 4 жыл бұрын
This is one of the best racist Bert jokes I’ve seen
@shakti5357
@shakti5357 4 жыл бұрын
Bert "I've definitely passed out from coughing" Kreischer
@ylliw21
@ylliw21 4 жыл бұрын
Then he immediately says “But im fine!” Lmfaoo
@William.H.Bonney
@William.H.Bonney 4 жыл бұрын
A huuuuundred percent!
@imdabeast100
@imdabeast100 4 жыл бұрын
It’s good for you you know? Resets the ol system
@TheHehe1223
@TheHehe1223 4 жыл бұрын
Bert "I lost so much weight by drugging myself" Kreischer
@penniewyatt9391
@penniewyatt9391 4 жыл бұрын
The real “Hollywood diet”.
@benthomson582
@benthomson582 4 жыл бұрын
Bert : “he looks like sylvester stallone there” Tom: “that is sylvester stallone”
@walker2788
@walker2788 4 жыл бұрын
Bert can't drink any green juice unless he's drinking it like shots
@cliftonsargent1572
@cliftonsargent1572 4 жыл бұрын
That’s legit, I was a massive alcoholic for 13 years and after a year and half being sober I’m the same way with coffee, water or Gatorade. He is a real living alcoholic 🤣
@Kouki.S14
@Kouki.S14 4 жыл бұрын
Glad I live alone, so no one can judge me for listening to Berts racism.
@raramcgee4982
@raramcgee4982 4 жыл бұрын
Family vacays sure are fun though!
@jordanporozov435
@jordanporozov435 4 жыл бұрын
I think my roommate has the wrong idea now
@darisfilmsdirect4038
@darisfilmsdirect4038 4 жыл бұрын
How is Bert Being Racist?
@andrewmanzanares4120
@andrewmanzanares4120 4 жыл бұрын
@@darisfilmsdirect4038 how isn’t he
@Destabilise15
@Destabilise15 4 жыл бұрын
@@darisfilmsdirect4038 oof dude... you’re saying a lot about yourself with this comment...
@jamiesucie2685
@jamiesucie2685 4 жыл бұрын
Bert: “I’m wondering if I’m getting Alzheimer’s?” Everyone watching: “Maybe lay off the box of “running” wine!”
@mortenberg2897
@mortenberg2897 4 жыл бұрын
This is SO great. I live in Denmark, and I am “spreading the word” about the YMH shows. Fan from denmark 🇩🇰
@haemorrhage666
@haemorrhage666 4 жыл бұрын
Bart about Del Toro: "I would pay hardcore money to watch his hair get cut." spit my cola all over my desk to that :D
@idab6864
@idab6864 4 жыл бұрын
Made me think that if Tom ever becomes the serial killer he wants to be, he could call Bert to help clean up, and Bert would cut the hair off the dead bodies like a creep
@neuvisean1739
@neuvisean1739 4 жыл бұрын
"I've definitely passed out from coughing...but I'm fine"
@googleuser859
@googleuser859 4 жыл бұрын
It's called cough syncope, it's pretty common. It's not really an issue, just weird and a bit scary.
@phalspar
@phalspar 4 жыл бұрын
@@googleuser859 gotta love these backseat podcasters
@Slim_T_ODB
@Slim_T_ODB 4 жыл бұрын
@@googleuser859 he passes out from laughing. It's definitely a problem
@phalspar
@phalspar 4 жыл бұрын
@Jake thanks Jake, hope your khakis are pressed
@phalspar
@phalspar 4 жыл бұрын
@Jake o7 carry on Soldier
@MrMetalMan
@MrMetalMan 4 жыл бұрын
"Rogan sized thumb" is my new favorite form of measurement.
@Cyxz666
@Cyxz666 4 жыл бұрын
People are concerned about Barf's health. Barf: "Look at me" .....Yeah thats why
@ceebee491
@ceebee491 4 жыл бұрын
Nice 👍
@Revolution1117
@Revolution1117 4 жыл бұрын
"Fat as a fiddle".
@kanifalam7835
@kanifalam7835 4 жыл бұрын
"I've passed out from coughing, I'm fine"😂, thinks his hand shaking could be parkinson's, denial is strong with the alcoholics
@piratepat44
@piratepat44 4 жыл бұрын
it's a core tenant of addiction after all
@SouthernOregonOrgani
@SouthernOregonOrgani 4 жыл бұрын
He knows the truth inside, as a fellow former alcoholic (Iv since gotten help and continue to get help weekly) we all know how bad it is. He loves booze so much he will say anything to rationalize the continued use of the stuff. I love Bert and only wish him the best, and it’s not any ones place to tell him to stop besides his wife and mother of his children. He does seem like a happy drunk at least, so could be worse
@earl-larsen
@earl-larsen 4 жыл бұрын
hand shaking is usually withdrawals lmao. my man berts body is constantly wanting for alcohol
@cameronjuarez2195
@cameronjuarez2195 4 жыл бұрын
I love that every time bert brings up he drinks a whole bottle of wine he leaves out the fact it’s over 500 calories in a bottle of fitvine wine
@Rick_James
@Rick_James 4 жыл бұрын
I love the dogs attack licks-“Bert” sure ya do bert
@JR-rz1br
@JR-rz1br 4 жыл бұрын
His beard is covered in binge session crumbs and health shake residue, the dog is just getting breakfast.
@billybobthornton5144
@billybobthornton5144 4 жыл бұрын
It’s just foreplay before he fuck it.
@nathanmiller9918
@nathanmiller9918 4 жыл бұрын
...its the pre-peanut butter ritual
@scombapodcast1875
@scombapodcast1875 4 жыл бұрын
The new segment "the people are worried about you" is my favorite.
@zapata9617
@zapata9617 4 жыл бұрын
huh so brent has just been hiding a benzo addiction under an alcohol addiction
@LikeigiveAFaboutU
@LikeigiveAFaboutU 4 жыл бұрын
He has said very publicly his attraction to xanax. It's fine
@kassmick2994
@kassmick2994 4 жыл бұрын
its a diettt.
@LikeigiveAFaboutU
@LikeigiveAFaboutU 4 жыл бұрын
@@kassmick2994 A Hundread percent
@zapata9617
@zapata9617 4 жыл бұрын
@@kassmick2994 Bert's gonna be the new 'Heroin girl' -> 'Benzo Brent'
@d.c.1059
@d.c.1059 4 жыл бұрын
Don't go Jordan Peterson on us bruh
@mqtnate
@mqtnate 4 жыл бұрын
Died when they read the gay dudes gifts lmao subway series tickets😂then the switch🤣 so sick
@josephadams1386
@josephadams1386 4 жыл бұрын
I’ve never seen a comment section that only wants to blow one host so bad.
@drewstaples9648
@drewstaples9648 4 жыл бұрын
The way Tom tells his story about meeting Rogan is Amazing
@mr.chupacabra7172
@mr.chupacabra7172 4 жыл бұрын
"That's why they call me the Alex Jones of fitness."
@jmart1079
@jmart1079 4 жыл бұрын
Bart literally going through all the steps of rationalizing alcoholism and all the addictions that surround it.
@franksixer
@franksixer 4 жыл бұрын
Brett, you're still not understanding what I'm saying LMFAO 😂😂 You're passing out because of your health! 😂😂
@Ottophil
@Ottophil 4 жыл бұрын
Go take a steroid
@brandon4391
@brandon4391 4 жыл бұрын
@@Ottophil I can tell you his response before he says it : go do a push-up
@franksixer
@franksixer 4 жыл бұрын
@@brandon4391 😂😂😂
@Ottophil
@Ottophil 4 жыл бұрын
@@franksixer not everyone has to be fit
@franksixer
@franksixer 4 жыл бұрын
@@Ottophil Did I say everyone had to be fit? Calm down. you felt like you had to post two things about this? 😂
@sly-1429
@sly-1429 4 жыл бұрын
"I drank the whole bottle by myself" So maybe don't drink the whole bottle by yourself that would be the first clue. Second clue is don't drink the 2nd or 3rd bottle by yourself either.
@nickapalooza861
@nickapalooza861 3 жыл бұрын
Or the other 2 bottles in the car....
@JesusVelociraptor
@JesusVelociraptor 4 жыл бұрын
Only 5 seconds in and there are tears in my eyes. 🤣🤣 Genius banter. Legendary.
@thomasduncan5522
@thomasduncan5522 4 жыл бұрын
You never should have shown us what this show could be without Bert.
@SJHunter86
@SJHunter86 4 жыл бұрын
Get Johnny Manziel. He definitely has nothing to lose.
@smashin
@smashin 4 жыл бұрын
Yay but he also has no real NFL experience or connections. They need a vet that did something in the league.
@peters8950
@peters8950 4 жыл бұрын
Bro couldn't even make it in the CFL🤣
@nickyv1436
@nickyv1436 4 жыл бұрын
Looking forward to more Tom talks. Forgetting what his voice sounds like
@-saint3319
@-saint3319 4 жыл бұрын
Oh is Tom on this show?
@TrevorScanlan
@TrevorScanlan 4 жыл бұрын
@@-saint3319 no, it's just a cardboard cutout that Bernt Crappsler talks at
@GTshortStories
@GTshortStories 4 жыл бұрын
“He looks like Sylvester Stallone there” That is Sylvester Stallone. 😂😂
@jamesthomas9619
@jamesthomas9619 4 жыл бұрын
Imagine if bert literally never worked out, he'd have himself a show on tlc lol
@primatt
@primatt 4 жыл бұрын
Bert NEEDS to try “irn bru” basically Scotland’s national drink at this point & it’s a gingery fizzy drink, it is my life 🤷🏼‍♂️😂
@PhoggyThoughts
@PhoggyThoughts 4 жыл бұрын
Stuff tastes like bubblegum kinda. I loved it when i went there
@brianmarkey1500
@brianmarkey1500 4 жыл бұрын
Would go down a treat wae him. Best hangover cure 👌
@JJ.Graphics777
@JJ.Graphics777 4 жыл бұрын
He said he needs an intervention 😂
@lexiehua1457
@lexiehua1457 4 жыл бұрын
It’s orange but it’s definitely not gingery.
@rog6646
@rog6646 4 жыл бұрын
Type in "Iron bru comedy" into youtube. Click on the first video. Funniest thing ever... second to bart bathing in his pool
@linemanlovesyou859
@linemanlovesyou859 4 жыл бұрын
Love that they got a new googler and showed him off by giving him 35 mins to answer one question.
@habowtat
@habowtat 4 жыл бұрын
He had the answer well before then most likely, but I Guarantee Native would never have found it lol
@Revolution1117
@Revolution1117 4 жыл бұрын
Yeah, what a champ...
@tylerbeaton8439
@tylerbeaton8439 4 жыл бұрын
Well its cause they have a million requests and little questions, I dont understand why tom doesnt just control it
@bigsteveno
@bigsteveno 4 жыл бұрын
When someone with a drinking problem starts saying "I need an intervention" they really do need an intervention. It's not funny anymore.
@phalspar
@phalspar 4 жыл бұрын
@@eligiol yet you watch, you LOVE Bert! It’s so awesome to see his number 1 fan commenting
@justinr6439
@justinr6439 4 жыл бұрын
I feel like if they really thought it was a problem Tom and the wifes would definitely get him help
@rhpslover1220
@rhpslover1220 4 жыл бұрын
Just, shhhhhhhhhhh.
@somethingfunny4332
@somethingfunny4332 4 жыл бұрын
@@rhpslover1220 you won’t be saying that when he’s 6ft under
@earl-larsen
@earl-larsen 4 жыл бұрын
@@justinr6439 bert drinks everyday. its a problem lmao. i say this as a fellow heavy drinker ;)
@IrishGary1
@IrishGary1 4 жыл бұрын
God I love listening to bert try so hard for the first half of the day and then losing his mind and going absolutely mental for the rest of the day...😂😂😂😂
@OutlierConcepts
@OutlierConcepts 4 жыл бұрын
"luck is what happens when preparation (hard work) meets opportunity"
@WakeandBlake_420
@WakeandBlake_420 4 жыл бұрын
Bert makes out with his dog every morning. Who is surprised?
@John15293
@John15293 4 жыл бұрын
And then doesn't brush his teeth 🌚💀
@CutterDriftwood
@CutterDriftwood 4 жыл бұрын
I am!! I thought he spent all of his mornings hemming up Klan robes for the weekend meet up's!! Sorry Brett!!
@Max-zr7hr
@Max-zr7hr 4 жыл бұрын
And then eats his boogers
@hanzomain9991
@hanzomain9991 4 жыл бұрын
1:04:40 Bert: “Omg he looks like Sylvester Stallone there.” Tom: “That is Sylvester Stallone”
@redlymedia1583
@redlymedia1583 4 жыл бұрын
"That's why they call me the Alex Jones of fitness" No Bert, just you.
@phalspar
@phalspar 4 жыл бұрын
I’m sure there’s others
@charlesbirdsong6782
@charlesbirdsong6782 4 жыл бұрын
42:32 I’ve never seen Bart’s face so befuddled and filled with confidence at the same time.
@David_D.926
@David_D.926 4 жыл бұрын
We never got to hear Tom's Top 5 list for guests on "Tom Talks"
@darkyolks
@darkyolks 4 жыл бұрын
You know it’s a good episode when they go well past the one hour mark
@wolvw
@wolvw 4 жыл бұрын
The magic of this show is that it let's me escape for at least an hour from my shit day..
@jacklloyd4376
@jacklloyd4376 4 жыл бұрын
I hope things get better for you, Listening to Bert is funny but it certainly shouldn't be the highlight of your day
@ColmBurke
@ColmBurke 4 жыл бұрын
Hope you’re good man!
@skkeeper
@skkeeper 4 жыл бұрын
"Have we ever lost a war?" - I don't know Bert maybe Segura's dad can answer that question looool
@anthonymiller934
@anthonymiller934 4 жыл бұрын
LMAOOO!! yeah I’d love to be there to hear TopDogs response
@shadowspectrum
@shadowspectrum 4 жыл бұрын
I can hear him getting so fired up. "Listen buddy"
@coprophagiaentertainment1120
@coprophagiaentertainment1120 4 жыл бұрын
Maybe one day we will learn who tom wants to Hve on his podcast.
@MissyGirl5150
@MissyGirl5150 4 жыл бұрын
I love men that aren’t ashamed to over share together. I’m here for it!🤣🤣🤣
@svhmj3918
@svhmj3918 4 жыл бұрын
When Bert says "this is so good for you", I have a feeling that it's the complete opposite.
@colina1330
@colina1330 4 жыл бұрын
I dunno. I feel like he actually has somewhat of a handle on what's good and isn't good for him. He fully admits that his lifestyle is probably gonna kill him one day.
@maverickwyattlee3416
@maverickwyattlee3416 4 жыл бұрын
Colin a. Agree. His stupidity is his longest running joke. It’s what sells him. He don’t stink isn’t racist and isn’t as dumb as he projects himself to be. It’s his image. He appeals to lower class white people lol
@colina1330
@colina1330 4 жыл бұрын
@@maverickwyattlee3416 yeah, he definitely has a weird brain and thinks differently than most people, and makes strange little rationalizations, but I don't think he's legitimately dumb. I have a feeling that that shake is probably super healthy.
@maverickwyattlee3416
@maverickwyattlee3416 4 жыл бұрын
Colin. Exactly. He isn’t a the smartest by any stretch of the imagination. And he definitely looks at things differently like you said. So his interpretations and understandings are misconstrued.
@nathanmiller9918
@nathanmiller9918 4 жыл бұрын
Relative to 64 oz. of Koolaid.
@Mike-om4tv
@Mike-om4tv 4 жыл бұрын
I always bring people with me to watch this podcast...for safety.
@Emm3D
@Emm3D 4 жыл бұрын
As long its a person and not a dog, you'll be okay
@oldyoungone
@oldyoungone 4 жыл бұрын
Im loving this new early upload time, gets my monday started off right
@clintonleonard5187
@clintonleonard5187 4 жыл бұрын
It's been Monday mornings for a while now. But yeah, I like it, too.
@gengar8118
@gengar8118 Жыл бұрын
It doesn’t matter what order you watch the episodes, Bert is always “the fattest he’s ever been”😂😂😂
@a.v.julian9917
@a.v.julian9917 4 жыл бұрын
"2 Bunnies, 1 Hole" as the theme for April!
@Cyxz666
@Cyxz666 4 жыл бұрын
Here's your quick fix Bart: Stop drinking alcohol.
@chrisbuehler6868
@chrisbuehler6868 4 жыл бұрын
@@torched80 benzo withdrawals can kill you too so he's fucked either way
@brockstebbing8359
@brockstebbing8359 4 жыл бұрын
I love the fact that nobody has anything original anymore, it's all regurgitated.. This is the template Bart or barf + fat, alcohol..
@Cyxz666
@Cyxz666 4 жыл бұрын
@@brockstebbing8359 Welcome to Barf's personality.
@Jakem763
@Jakem763 4 жыл бұрын
5 bottles of wine is FOR SURE why Brentard can’t lose weight, good god
@MlRAAK
@MlRAAK 4 жыл бұрын
That's at least 90 grams of sugar and maybe 1200 calories
@caladr9367
@caladr9367 4 жыл бұрын
Fit vine is at least 110 calories per 5 ounce glass * 5 glasses per bottle * 5 bottles = 2750 calories
@Phi1618033
@Phi1618033 4 жыл бұрын
"Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity." -- Seneca
@CutterDriftwood
@CutterDriftwood 4 жыл бұрын
"If you always see the cup as half empty, piss in it until it's full" -- Homeless guy in the woods behind my building
@Whoisthiskid1
@Whoisthiskid1 4 жыл бұрын
Bert is seriously worrying, btw very interesting listening to you guys talk what movies that guy was in for 20 mins
@jakobedukes579
@jakobedukes579 Жыл бұрын
3 years later and i still love listening to tim and bart
@FrostyJokerr
@FrostyJokerr 4 жыл бұрын
I’d definitely buy a 2 Bears “tasteful nude” calendar.
@ryanmcardle9652
@ryanmcardle9652 4 жыл бұрын
God..I wish they'd stop interrupting these commercials with this podcast.. Jesus
@Slim_T_ODB
@Slim_T_ODB 4 жыл бұрын
Seriously. I pay for premium not to see ads and these fuckers just bombard me with them
@Erika11Garcia
@Erika11Garcia 4 жыл бұрын
They gotta get their money tho I can’t hate on em just skip over them
@brandon4391
@brandon4391 4 жыл бұрын
Lol can’t tap 6 times? That’s all it takes
@jf3130
@jf3130 4 жыл бұрын
Just tap your screen and skip it. Don't hate bcos people need to make money
@ryanmcardle9652
@ryanmcardle9652 4 жыл бұрын
It was a joke?? Lol..
@wisterV
@wisterV 4 жыл бұрын
“I need an intervention right now!” Bret at 43:11
@Tonz420
@Tonz420 4 жыл бұрын
I do feel better now. Thank you Bears!
@ThomasTk30
@ThomasTk30 4 жыл бұрын
The faces tom makes when Brent says something ridiculous is priceless.
@louiecampanelli5343
@louiecampanelli5343 4 жыл бұрын
Bert’s new special title: “cleaning boats”
@connorhayes833
@connorhayes833 4 жыл бұрын
"A Rogan sized thumb of ginger" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
@Liax316
@Liax316 4 жыл бұрын
Bert: “I wouldn’t have a presidential candidate on my podcast because that’s just like inviting a bunch of hate” Also Bert: posts a video with a trump flag in his house and says bombing Yemen is a win
@lukestrong5779
@lukestrong5779 4 жыл бұрын
I mean the trump flag he put up to annoy his daughters and the Yemen things clearly a joke but go cancel him
@Liax316
@Liax316 4 жыл бұрын
@@lukestrong5779 I’m aware he is joking and never said cancel him lol. I’m just pointing out other things he talked about in this podcast that could “invite hate” towards him
@aaronclinard5003
@aaronclinard5003 4 жыл бұрын
I've been listening to these guys for years. I keep waiting for the day Bert realizes his main problem is that he has ADHD.
@MastaSmoke420
@MastaSmoke420 3 жыл бұрын
I wish someone would ask him on one of these many different podcasts if he's ever been tested or thought about ADHD. Also I'm a recovering addict and the itchy nose thing mixed with talking super fast was a dead giveaway when some people are high on pills. The only reason I even mention it is because he has talked about getting a little hooked on them after his back injury off the waterfall on an episode of YMH. I love you Bert! I only want you to live a long life!
@recurringintensity
@recurringintensity 3 жыл бұрын
totally not the problem, it's freaking GOLD! 🤣😭😂🤣
@firstnamelastname8713
@firstnamelastname8713 4 жыл бұрын
I know nadav can’t google for shit but could you imagine beet barking some of the vaguest and miss joined things to google and getting annoyed because you don’t understand him hahah
@RampagesFTW
@RampagesFTW 4 жыл бұрын
Love that this is out at 6am exactly every week
@Sosorrynotsorry
@Sosorrynotsorry 4 жыл бұрын
Damn. Bert almost made it the whole episode with a phone call. The streak continues
@tactical_philanthropy
@tactical_philanthropy 4 жыл бұрын
So Bert is essentially begging to be the tranquilized from a Helicopter once every day, so he can lose weight.
@VideoNozoki
@VideoNozoki 4 жыл бұрын
Bert is starting to make me feel on Ari's side...... (I didn't think that was possible)
@Spinnaman
@Spinnaman 4 жыл бұрын
Yay.... I made it. Lol Been catching up and watched all of the episodes since October. Now I'm caught up. You guys are crazy but I appreciate your comedy and humor. Been talking about you everyday to everyone. Much love
@allysonheller9215
@allysonheller9215 4 жыл бұрын
Tom's reactions to Bert are my favorite part of this podcast.
@onaaap
@onaaap 4 жыл бұрын
Tom goes “I’m jealous your vice is being an alcoholic” 😭😭
@VideoNozoki
@VideoNozoki 4 жыл бұрын
I wanted to hear the other half of that thought.... (this show always leaves me wondering what Tom was going to say before... well, ya know...)
@onaaap
@onaaap 4 жыл бұрын
@@VideoNozoki lmaooooo
@jakrispy3418
@jakrispy3418 4 жыл бұрын
Bert asks "what's September known for?" Well gee I don't know Bert..✈+🏙=💥
@ry2fly666
@ry2fly666 4 жыл бұрын
The 2 Bears Calendar is really gonna bring in money for the 2 Bears Holding CORP LLC.
@myousickoflife
@myousickoflife 4 жыл бұрын
Can't wait for the calendar! As a Canadian born in September I couldn't believe it when you said you would dress up as a lumberjack for September. Love you guys! :D
@SnypeNG
@SnypeNG 4 жыл бұрын
1:09:11 Bert is slowly turning into Homer Simpson and I love it.
@TrundleTheGreat
@TrundleTheGreat 4 жыл бұрын
Bert: "His face is like that from birth complications" completely leaves off that the complications included Bells Palsy paralyzing part of his face.
@iamfuturetrunks
@iamfuturetrunks 4 жыл бұрын
This was a really good episode. I really enjoyed hearing about those luck experiences that ended up shaping their futures really cool to hear about that. Then it got to near the end and started to wonder if I should really post this comment. XD lol
@BeanEaterExtraordinaire
@BeanEaterExtraordinaire 4 жыл бұрын
Bert's shoes getting tight sounds like severe type 2 diabetes, RIP in peace Bart
@VideoNozoki
@VideoNozoki 4 жыл бұрын
Bert - "You know you'll dealing with a serious weight issue when your shoes get too tight!" Tom - could it just be a laces problem? Bert - "Nope, I'm wearing boots, so can't even use that excuse." LOL!
@coffeeabuse
@coffeeabuse 4 жыл бұрын
Is it Nadav that's doing all the laughing in the background here and on the YMH stuff? I like it because it really adds to the show!
@salamiot
@salamiot 4 жыл бұрын
It is. His laugh is infectious
@JosephEhrenpreis
@JosephEhrenpreis 4 жыл бұрын
Dude his appreciation of humor comes from his character shaping from watching Drumline
@coffeeabuse
@coffeeabuse 4 жыл бұрын
@@JosephEhrenpreis Hahaha yeah that whole Drumline thing was hilarious.
@JosephEhrenpreis
@JosephEhrenpreis 4 жыл бұрын
@@coffeeabuse hahah
@TheDaveLD
@TheDaveLD 4 жыл бұрын
"Lisa left eyeeees losesss way more than Andreee Rissons." Bob Chrysler you gorgeous train-wreck... must have looped that back a dozen times...ribs hurt...so funny.
@OutlierConcepts
@OutlierConcepts 4 жыл бұрын
Nadav is gonna regret taking that time off after Tom and Brent realize his minimum wage intern replacement has better Google skills.
@neighborbruce
@neighborbruce 4 жыл бұрын
Nadav was there too
@carterbolin8418
@carterbolin8418 4 жыл бұрын
Nadavs shitty googling skills are kinda hilarious tho. When he looked up PLASTT pics and he pulled up plastic tupperware I died laughing. I feel like Nadav is a gag at this point
@jf3130
@jf3130 4 жыл бұрын
His laugh is worth it
@squigtonianmayhem4602
@squigtonianmayhem4602 4 жыл бұрын
The laugh timed with Tom's look at the camera...perfect!
@havoc391
@havoc391 4 жыл бұрын
What a shame if bart’s little brother loses his overpaying job.
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