Everyone Thinks I'm In The Wrong For Refusing To Give My Child My Wife's Ex's Name r/Relationships

[@ComaLies225]

To be fair to OP in the update, mom claiming she would rather unalive herself than name her child would have made me call the police too. That’s totally unhinged behavior. She needs counseling. There’s just no way this is a reasonable thing to say, especially over a name.

[@alexanderhenby1362]

Sounds like Post Pardem and is super common. The hospital should have done an evaluation before they left (A lot of hospitals have been dropping the ball on that recently)

[@PinkMarshmallows]

I would have called the police as well. Bish is WAY TOO UNHINDGED!

[@untitled-gv3qp]

He wasn't wrong though. She's extremely unhinged and obsessed with her dead ex to a scary degree. She should've been committed for longer considering everything. The fact that they kept her overnight on just the OPs word speaks volumes. She really isn't safe to be around that kid. I'd be worried about her hurting the baby because it doesn't have the name she wanted now.

[@katphish30]

@@alexanderhenby1362 Post parTUm

[@untitled-gv3qp]

​@@alexanderhenby1362 But that started years before this. She changed her name and the sons name while she was married to the OP. It honestly makes me worried about the OP since he never thought to address that until now. Changing the kids middle name can be overlooked but she changed her last name to the EXs while married to her current husband. It still doesn't sound like the OP fully understands that he was just the placeholder so she could pretend her EX was still around.

[@taylorwashington7682]

She really blew up her marriage over a dead person. Shes never going to be able to have any other relationship if she keeps this up.

[@immapotato1]

like the comments said the entire marriage was about her ex. OP looks similar to the ex. she simply wanted a kid sge could pass off as her and her ex's kid (in her mind).

[@LunaP1]

She is not stable enough to be a parent or stable enough be in a new relationship.

[@kaykay8855]

@@immapotato1 I mentioned this in my previous comment but her parents, ex in-laws, and friends aren’t helping.

[@lynnw7155]

Did they discuss this before the baby was conceived? The baby should get one of the parents surname, not someone unrelated. This is a total insult to the REAL father; she has no respect what-so-ever for OP. Wife is unhinged; her whole family is unhinged. I hope OP gets custody.

[@PaulaSB12]

She must have really done badly with the cops to have been taken to the hospital in the uk due to people being dumped into mental hospitals because of being inconvenient it’s really hard to get someone put into a mental hospital

[@cardwitch91]

1st Story: Why is everyone in this story deluded? This woman is sick and clearly, clearly, CLEARLY needs psychiatric help. What’s worse is that her family and her decreased partner’s family are enabling her psychosis! Hope OP and the new girl is OK. Nevermind that poor little boy

[@backpug1228]

Because wOmEn 🤡 because we need to be cuddled like noone else!!!

[@carlrood4457]

I'm nor sure of the actual term, but it sounds like some shared psychosis brought on by mutual grief. They even seem to have gone out and recruited OP to father the daughter the late EX never had.

[@kahluakarnage]

They only saw OP as a supermarket donor who looked close enough to have the baby pass as her deceased ex.

[@creepysaru]

​@carlrood4457 My apologies I fell asleep on my phone and send many weird comments.

[@ynmonroe]

But is he the father though? I could see the ex's parents being on BS, but hers, her sister, and her friends? What if she has this audacity because she knows he isn't the father? I mean that slick comment the ex's parents made to OP regarding his authority just seems to raise questions for me.

[@survivalsamuel]

Dude is a genius, actually got her with a record so he can take his daughter in a case, AND got his last name on the child, good on him

[@colleens1107]

I read it more as desperation than genius. His wife wanted to erase him as the parent. I think she would have put her DEAD HUSBAND down as the father on the birth certificate if she could legally do so. Yes he has everything he needs to keep his daughter out of the crazy family’s hand but I doubt that was why he did it.

[@survivalsamuel]

@@colleens1107 the smartest of choices come from the most desperate of times

[@untitled-gv3qp]

​@@colleens1107 True, but intelligence in hindsight can still be seen as intelligence. Most people don't have things planned out years in advance. They figure it out on the fly. The way you overcome the issues that crop up is what shows your genius.

[@thomasjoseph5876]

@@colleens1107 Being that in most cases in countries all around the world, mothers are granted custody of minor children, especially infants, a huge majority of the time unless they are deemed a danger to themselves and/or the children, this seems like a "Gift from the Gods" handed to the OP. Regardless of it being desperation or genius, that baby girl needs to remain far away from the mother as there is no guarantee the baby will be safe around her now that the name has a zero tie-in to her dead ex. She might just decide the baby is no longer relevant and simply "end her". Look what she did with the naming "after the fact" with her son. Who knows what would happen if the son ever started to want to distance himself from his dead father. The mother may take that as a huge insult and "end" him. This "Mother" should not be around ANY of hers or other kids for an extended period of time until she receives some serious mental health treatment and even then, any visitation should be HEAVILY supervised.

[@SirNomad]

I've heard that's about what it takes in the UK.

[@Mario-SunshineGalaxy64]

Feel like I walked into the Twilight Zone, can’t believe the majority of people in their lives sided with the ex over something so crazy. Unfortunately it seems like OP’s son is going to be poisoned against OP and OP should prepare for that inevitability.

[@adyashanayak7958]

OP raised him as his son but he is the ex's child biologically.

[@carlrood4457]

Almost sounds like a conspiracy to get the dead ex a "daughter" and everyone on her side was in on it

[@untitled-gv3qp]

​@@adyashanayak7958 That doesn't really mean anything here though. The EX is dead and the rest of the son's bio family is insane. It's still better if the OP could stay in his life and keep his family from screwing him up mentally. The OPs soon to be ex isn't going to stop obsessing over her EX anytime soon with everyone on her side. She's just gonna get worse and it's gonna be redirected to the son. She'll end up trying to make him into a copy of her EX.

[@rickhernandez7666]

I really hope OP can ask for custody of the son based on her mental health and his history as a father figure in the son's life.

[@terramarini6880]

@@carlrood4457 So then she can go out and get knocked up on a tinder date, don't tell the dad and name it whatever they bloody want. Why did she marry an innocent and drag him into this, he was told he would have trouble with reproduction so this is HIS miracle baby, not some moldy corpse he never knew. What in the actual bloody H. And if she is medicated with anti psychotics do not feed that expressed milk to the baby unless it's given the OK by a doctor. Never mind, she might adulterate it to set him up, don't feed it to baby at all.

[@adyashanayak7958]

Story 2 guy obviously hasn't heard about the guy who was about to get mucked and asked reddit for advice on how to handle it. He came back after the deed and described it in great detail. It was horrifying to read. And the guy continued to stink for days even after cleaning himself multiple times. His parents avoided him for weeks.

[@cindykq8086]

Did his GF finally dump him?

[@jimbobjones9330]

I remember that story, too. From a few years ago.

[@adyashanayak7958]

@@LostSoulchild89 don't have it. Heard it on youtube itself.

[@adyashanayak7958]

@@cindykq8086 am talking about a different story.

[@jimbobjones9330]

@@adyashanayak7958 Same here. Maybe on rslash or somewhere? I heard it several years ago.

[@feministawry1600]

Wife is in love with her EX and not with OP.

[@cindykq8086]

And her parents fully enabling it.

[@Bleg94]

@@cindykq8086 everyone in her life but OP is enabling it

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

Most definitely! Especially when we found out he resembles the dead ex.

[@avaphynx]

Hopefully OP in story one can get full custody. His ex is fkn crazy. And threatening to unalive herself was also wild. Glad he got the law and mental health involved. Hopefully the courts will see her as unstable.

[@PinkMarshmallows]

Of both kids, but he might only get his daughter. That poor boy, having so many crazies around him.

[@avaphynx]

@@PinkMarshmallows you're right because her family and her ex's family are loons.

[@TheAuthorgal]

@@PinkMarshmallowsAgreed. These people are not stable. And they’re already treating him like the dead husband’s property.

[@addicted2mako]

I'm surprised she didn't try to make OP change his name to the Ex's and let his parents adopt him at this point! This situation is really yikesy

[@emtims1670]

LMAO same. It's actually ridiculous.

[@JohnWilliams-wl9px]

You know if he said yes to the kid name, she would eventually have done that

[@ajaxjohnson7999]

Bruh!

[@renaeodonnell4558]

I cannot wait for the next update from story 2. Holy shit that kid really doesn’t get why everyone is upset and mad at him for his petty crimes.

[@cindykq8086]

“Holy shit” hahaha! It’s not just he commits petty crime, he’s proud of it. How to say you’re a POS (pun intended) without actually saying it.

[@mikaq19]

It seems like they are talking about smoking weed. It’s not legal everywhere.

[@jimbobjones9330]

@@mikaq19 I thought that, too, but at the very end of the video, Markee says it's petty theft. So even though it isn't a major crime, it still isn't a victimless one.

[@ArcticFFox]

@@mikaq19 they are not. the BORU post outright says that his crimes were shoplifting.

[@katphish30]

My husband and I are from small towns in the Midwest, and we just had a great time talking about this dipshit having no idea what he's in for. His saying it couldn't be that bad because horse manure isn't that bad was particularly hilarious.

[@HyruleHeroHan]

Story 2: Okay, this guy… There are times where a story sounds fake or is clearly fake, but this is one of those times where I *hope* the story is fake because this guy sounds deranged. Even if we discount him thinking everyone else is crazy about the punishment he’s very much downplaying, the disrespect he’s shown to his gf just shows how he is. This woman needs to leave, both to maybe find a better person and to not have to deal with the smell afterwards (which again, is the least of this guy’s concerns).

[@LittleMaitea]

He sounds like an addict And so deranged that I also assume it’s true As it’s so crazy nobody could come up with this craziness

[@SteviiLove]

As a woman and mother who birthed a human and has been raising him for 12 years, I can't really understand the logic of the first OP's baby momma. I can empathize with her loss but I can't understand her thought process or why she chose this hill to die on. The rule for baby names is 2 yes's, 1 no. *BOTH* parents if present have a say but one can not override/steamroll the other's feelings on the matter. Poor kids and OP.

[@jmonique6409]

Not only is she seriously unwell, but her whole family and exes family are as well. Op hit the unlucky lottery. People might have their disagreements about naming babies, but I'm pretty sure everyone else agrees that an ex or unrelated person should not even be thought of when choosing a name.

[@Hukysuky]

@@jmonique6409 Yeah like that is so crazy I could maybe get behind her if she only wanted her maiden name for her baby, not something I would do but at least she had something to do with it. I wonder what almost everyone in that family is smoking.

[@bigbagofhate]

Story 2: I have to admit until the reveal came, my first thought that he was partaking of the devil's lettuce in a country where it isn't legal as much as the OP was downplaying the severity and upplaying the joy it brings him. Did NOT expect it to be serial shoplifting.

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

I suspected shoplifting, and idk why.

[@b.c.9358]

​@@gtc9966it's weed.

[@Vipre-]

@@gtc9966 Nah you can't leave us like that, you gotta tell us what you thought it was.

[@Vipre-]

All things considered that wasn't too unreasonable an assumption. This being the internet I've heard stuff before that made me ponder my existence for a moment in disbelief. Thought it might've been one of those.

[@LittleMaitea]

I expected something like stealing berry’s/ fruits/ vegetables/ etc. from his neighbours gardens

[@locusxe1411]

Yeah everyone on his exs side of the family is very crazy. And she’s definitely gonna try to drag out this divorce. Maybe Op will have an edge with him getting her admitted for a psych evaluation. Hopefully can show the courts that his exs family is insane and are not deserving of a child to take care of

[@immapotato1]

glad it's the UK cause knowing the US family court that kid would be instantly given to the psychotic woman

[@KCohere33]

I can’t believe all of these people don’t understand how unreasonable this is.

[@jimbobjones9330]

And then the friends calling and basically calling him a misogynist for not wanting to use the dead guy's name is astounding. If she wanted the baby to have _her_ surname, then that could be a valid argument. But claiming misogyny because he didn't want the baby named after a dead man that isn't even related to the baby is insane.

[@crichtonbruce4329]

As far as the dead EX's parents go I'm wondering is all this was a long thought out plan between the wife and the parents, each egging on and supporting each other in this lunacy. Perhaps they think the child is the dead EX reincarnated or something.

[@andrewalexander9492]

@@jimbobjones9330 YEah, if it were a case of the wife, who still used her maiden name, wanting to give her daughter her maiden name ... OK, I can see the logic. But this wasn't a case of a woman who retained her name, she did change her name to her previous husband's name. That changes the situation completely.

[@jakemarie828]

If I were OP, I'd suggest changing my OWN first and last name to her late ex's and watch her consider it sincerely in her derangement.

[@emtims1670]

I was waiting for her to suggest it tbh

[@NoRegretsHomestuck]

Bro the fact that this guy who was insanely cocky didn’t come back with an update about how the mucking wasn’t that bad proves it definitely traumatised him, I would go so far as to say it was also a wake up call because I feel like with how insane he was even if he didn’t last he would of updated a lie saying he breezed through it and returned to petty crime

[@chinaking918]

I get ppl have a type but holy hell. Wtf she definitely tried to replace her dead ex with him. The fact that she was going out of her way to name a child that has no relation to the deceased after him and when she couldn’t tried to use a name they (her and the ex) picked out for a daughter. 🤦🏾‍♀️That’s just creepy and I’m glad he got his daughter. The moment she get that baby alone she will be filling her head with lies on how her father is “dead”. She’s sick and really need to get help. Her family not helping either.

[@amazinglynn]

I want an update to story 2 so bad 😂

[@jonasn5]

That first story. Scary that a human can hide such deep mental illness and just spring it on you.. and that you in marriage dont need dual signing..

[@lucere3674]

I don't think I ever wanted another update so much for a story than the last one. When I was younger I would commit some petty crimes that I also didn't find morally repulsive. What were they gonna do? Stick me in jail for a few weeks, a few months tops? When you're young and dumb you think it's a guarantee that nothing will happen to you in jail if it's for a short amount of time. But if I was told I was going to be covered in a literal pile of shit, I 100% believe I would have stopped that instant. Also, now that I'm much older, I'm pretty much against most crimes. Even minor ones have victims. Even if it's not life changing, even just making someone's day even a little worse because you want to be stupid when life is already so hard is ridiculously selfish.

[@WhtAbtBob10]

Story 2: I'd love to hear OP's reaction after the this mucking happens to him.

[@RBISALEGEND18]

Agreed

[@BantheBans]

She wants the name so her son doesn't want her son to feel left out from "his new sibling AND FUTURE SIBLINGS". So this lunatic expects all of his kids to have her deceased spouse's name. That's so messed up. She must want to pretend they are all her deceased husbands kids, and is likely what she would tell people

[@kaykay8855]

Story 1: NTA. It sounds like op’s stbx wife never grieved properly and the fact that op mentioned that he looks like the ex and pretty much encouraged her behavior, she never truly loved op, he was a placeholder for her to project her grief.

[@ZombieSazza]

I HATE when someone is very clearly mentally unstable and going through a severe mental health crisis and their family members just stand by, not doing a thing to help. Her family just encouraged and enabling her delusions which just puts herself at danger, her child in danger, and OP in danger. Good on him for standing his ground, having that many toxic people dogpile you is hard (coming from a toxic & violent family who I’ve been no contact with for years, it’s TOUGH, you feel gaslit constantly) and can make you feel like you’re actually losing your very grip on reality, so I cannot stress just how PROUD I am of OP for not only standing his ground, but also getting her admitted into a psyche hold and getting the law involved. She really blew up her marriage and life by refusing to get any mental health help, being manipulative, and by refusing to get over her ex husband. She’s in love with a dead man, her true colours came out and revealed the true colours of all the toxic “friends” surrounding him. Her families meddling is absolutely crazy, they know how insane she is and they tried harassing OP into giving up his child, like WTF?!

[@jimdob6528]

Holy… crap… that story though. I’m glad the law finally put the father first.

[@cindykq8086]

When I read “holy crap” I assumed you were going to comment on the mucking story.

[@bettynolo23]

​@@cindykq8086😂😂😂me too!

[@babybluehashyo]

The law often does, but most fathers don't fight for their kids. They say they do, but they don't, not in court. They just expect the ex to do what they say and throw tantrums when they don't. Most fathers that go to court for their rights get them.

[@amyalpin6251]

Story 1 - He needs to sue for full custody and then try to move as far away as he legally can to keep his daughter away from that level of crazy. Story 2 - he is in the EPIC find out part of FAFO. I can't wait for the update. I wonder if he'll be genuinely surprised when his girlfriend eventually tires of his dumassery and leaves him.

[@Deedoof]

Story 2: The problem with the punishment is now OP's publicly confirmed a criminal. This kid did not think of his reputation and needs professional help.

[@humanbeing8948]

Story 1: it makes more sense having the child with a surname of either parent to be able to them up from daycare. More questions will be asked if the surname doesn't match. The wife will literally be forced to provide more documents to prove she didn't kidnap a child. The wife is delusional.

[@pris1378]

Pig shit is one of the worst smelling substances I have ever encountered. Horse manure is a bunch of roses in comparison.

[@juliearmfield2634]

Oh you are so right I grew up in farm country and there is nothing like the smell of pig s*** 🤢

[@littlepeeper9223]

You really put some heart and soul into story 2

[@eph2vv89only1way]

Story 1: It may actually not be legal to give the new baby the ex’s name. I remember several years ago a woman wanted to give her baby her ex husband’s name because the father had abandoned her. She wasn’t allowed so she took it to court. The court ruled that she had to either give the baby the birth father’s name or her maiden name (which she returned to after her divorce) since the ex husband wasn’t doing anything to raise the baby. Now, this was about 40 years ago so things could have changed, but op may want to look into it

[@Vipre-]

8:25 Damn, dude went beast mode on her. Well done sir.

[@lenax9798]

He needs to get a divorce and go for full custody on account of emotional abuse of the child.

[@ashh4929]

Story 1: Uhg and to think you are stuck being tied with this chick for the next 18 years. ETA Last story: Oh you poor smooth brained little dingus, there have been stories about multi-million dollar condos and cunstruction sites either being completely forfeited, severely being decreased in market value or going bust just by being next to a pig farm. That's hiw bad the smell is. 🤦‍♀️

[@notevenlistening6072]

He thinks it's no worse than horse dung. Oh, he's in for a shock 😂

[@MisadventuresOfKim]

I wonder if OP looked like the husband, because it’s giving replacement to complete her family

[@Markee]

Oop

[@kaykay8855]

Op mentioned that he does looks like the ex, not a clone but close enough.

[@Russman67]

She doesn't need to get in another relationship since she's so fixated on her ex who passed. Between her, her family and her ex's family, she's got all the crazy she needs for the foreseeable future. OP is going to be dealing with this for decades, until his daughter is old enough to have a say. I hope the boy finds some level of sanity in this chaos.

[@PalPayton]

She really tried to get her ex in laws to take the baby from her actual father?? This is beyond insane. Wife is absolutely looney tunes

[@juliearmfield2634]

Story 1. Nta. She F'd around and found out. Opie is nothing but a replacement she does not love or respect him if she did she wouldn't have been doing this. I've seen starving dogs let go of a bone easier than This Woman's letting go of this one. She needs mental health she's exactly where she needs to be

[@DominosAndHearts]

Umm let me get this straight ? Op wife wants op baby to have the surname of the ex 😅

[@DominosAndHearts]

Ok I've heard the rest of the story and op isn't the a hole

[@paulineisme]

OP's wife found a suitable donor so that she could still live her life with her deceased husband. In her mind, her late husband is both kids' father and the OP is just some guy

[@ajb7530]

This is the same issue that Ross from the FRIENDS tv series went through with Ben. Ross's ex-wife Carol and her partner Susan wanted Ben's last name to be Willck-Bunch. But since Ross is the FATHER, Ben's last name is Geller. OP is the father of the daughter, so the baby gets the fathers last name, not his exwife's deceased ex-boyfriend's last name. That doesn't never make sense.

[@ItsYaBoiV]

If you're not over your ex, regardless of why they're no longer in your life, you should just stay out of new relationships. It's not fair to your new partner, and it's not fair to any kids who might result from the new relationships. It's especially cruel to for this lady to then pull the "You're a manipulator" on OP.

[@Ayimii]

I've never heard his voice get so high-pitched in any story than when he started losing his mind at the idiocy of the last OP.

[@carmellollellogram]

S1: unhinged S2: also unhinged though hilarious... I need a post mucking update 😂

[@izzisart]

Story 1: The idea to use the mother's name hyphenated with each father's name is literally an amazing solution! I can't see what this lady is thinking. Clearly she isn't over her deceased husband's death- which, i know is something someone never fully gets over, but still- and she's using OP as a placeholder.

[@betheguy_posts]

(S1) Untreated grief really does some crazy shit to a person.

[@colleens1107]

I’m sooo glad OP managed to keep the baby out of his crazy STBX and her family’s hands AND prevented her from basically erasing him as the father. What else would she have done if she had registered the baby, put her dead husband down as the father? I wouldn’t put it past her. But yeah, he reaaaally should have paid attention to the red flags BEFORE all this. I doubt it JUST came out that she was still hung up on her dead husband. OP just ignored the signs. Best of luck to him and I hope the ex FINALLY gets a good therapist because she is definitely mentally unwell

[@andrewalexander9492]

It didn't come out just now. OP has been ignoring the red flags for a long time. The wife did not change her name to the dead husband's name when they got married, or while they were married. She changed her name to her dead husband's name years after he died, while she was in an exclusive relationship with OP. She *also* changed her sons name so that in addition to having the dead husband's surname, he also had dead husband's first and middle name as second and third middle names. There were plenty of signs she wasn't over her ex, OP ignored them.

[@madambutterfly1997]

That’s a major red flag. She wants to give the child she had with you the surname of her previous now deceased partner. And her logic is so her son doesn’t feel left out

[@historictruecrime5119]

People are absolutely insane to even entertain her stupidness. Good on you for fighting for your daughter, and not allowing crazy to prevail.

[@jodieg6318]

Oh my Heathen gods, no wonder the ex can't get over her issues, she surrounded by enablers that treat OP like a poor replacement. Ex wife is clearly ill, weather its excessive grief, guilt over his suicide, etc, she truly needed that mental health call. If OP is ment to be her place holder how is she gonna treat kids? As more replacements?

[@rebekah.2187]

My guess is that if the daughter has the deseased ex's surname, the wife can pretend she's the ex's daughter. I think she is trying to create the life she had envisioned having with her ex, and using OP to have the kids she and ex had planned to have. (I hope that made sense.) Her daughter having a different surname shatters that illusion. I agree with you about all the adults on her side of this. Her mental issues are one thing, but I'm more concerned that not one of them is willing to stand up and be the voice of reason.

[@jodieg6318]

@@rebekah.2187 Spot on. I would guess she's trying to live in a fantasy where her previous husband never died; when OP said he resembles him it cemented that for me, and I'm sure the in-laws are on board cause they want that just as much.

[@sgm8265]

And no doubt ex, family, and friends who agree with ex will use dead man's name instead of child's given, legal name. No confusion there for that child. Hope he demands full custody until she gets proper help. Keep everyone else away.

[@debl3063]

Wife in story 1 strikes me as the murder OP and cash insurance money kind of woman. Maybe she wouldn't have ended herself, but she would have done something else crazy. OP was right to call for mental help. She was using OP the whole time.

[@hildavegting1772]

Where I live you can only choose the name of one of the parents, not of a deceased person who is not related to the child.

[@ajakuk1]

Op made the call to have the wife taken for threatening S. Op did the right thing.

[@luvnotvideos]

I kinda want an update to find out how OP survived that Mucking. 😂

[@LoveValentineXO]

Honestly, when he mentioned she had locked the door and not come out the next day, I was afraid she was going to attempt to unalive herself then. When she said it to him, I thought he should call the police too.

[@nicolasv6031]

I feel so bad for OP, their daughter and the stbex's son. That lady is obviously still grieving the loss of her former husband, and was not ready to be in a relationship, let alone marry and have a kid with someone else. I hope she gets the help she needs to grieve and continue her life, as all she is doing now is trying to tie everything to the past, and an impossible future. Also, wtf is up with the former husband's parents? "Our grandchild is gonna be closer to your daughter than you're gonna be as her dad! WTF kind of logic is that? I know they are also likely grieving, but that is still just so.... insane

[@insanecowstar3008]

Story 1: way to set up your kid for future therapy. Hey your mom named you after her dead husband who committed suicide and gave you his last name even though he's not your dad.

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

23:42 I am absolutely _living_ for the acting rn! I’m about to fall off my bed cuz this is amazing! 😭😭😭😭💀💀💀💀

[@trishahoffman]

As a person with mental health troubles, I hope OP will work with mom to the child's best interest and not in vindictiveness. Sounds like OP is doing so, but mom probably feels like she lost her child and might do something to herself or something irrational until getting help. Stand your ground OP and be supportive of her getting help (even if you are exes). Take care of your baby girl! ❤ And congratulations on being a new dad!

[@biggysmallz40]

From the update, it doesn't seem like the mom wants op in her life even for help. From story one it seems like unless he agrees to the name she wants nothing to do with him. Unless I missed something

[@locusxe1411]

Story 2: I thought the wife dork the first story was crazy but this dude is just… YIKES!! I agree with the comments that he has some type of mental illness going on his brain because no sane person would risk doing crimes and then having the punishment for those crimes be being covered in manure for hours. That sounds like a terrible time and Op doesn’t understand what he’s getting into. I don’t feel sorry for him. Maybe this will help him learn his lesson

[@xelectrix]

I'm curious how it goes for OP, but part of me also feels like this is just some writing exercise. Like OP is writing from the POV of someone in the past that this happened to.

[@cindykq8086]

I googled it, and mucking as a legal punishment is real. The crazy person is the girlfriend for staying with someone who is proud of himself for being a criminal.

[@juliearmfield2634]

​@@xelectrixfor some reason I get the feeling that he's telling the truth and he really is that big of a dumbass

[@juliearmfield2634]

​@@cindykq8086all this because you won't stop stealing snicker bars. 🤣🤣🤣

[@lynnw7155]

I live on a farm...getting in the muck is a part of life. Being completely covered in it is not normal, but it happens. I've rolled around in mucky mud dealing with animal emergencies and isn't the end of the world. It beats going to jail or having a criminal record. He seems addicted to his 'crime' and needs help. What happens when he gets caught again? More mucking or real punishment? Muck won't ruin his life, but a criminal record will.

[@LadyJoolree]

Story 1 crazy lady was never married to the dead ex. He said longtime partner. She didn't even change her name when the guy was alive, but AFTER she had been with OP long enough for him to propose. Why did you do that OP, whyyyy?! I hope you are able to get custody of your child. But its likely they'll lie to get what they want. Be prepared!

[@krystalcox2787]

1st OP is living in backwards land apparently because it's so insane how so many people were against him WTH. Twilight zone nightmare

[@someanon1984]

Story 2: I thought it was drugs... Petty theft is so much more embarrassing. 😭

[@viktoriak4332]

Last stories op is giving that "what does it matter if I speed or cross a red light or two, I got enough in the bank to pay off any ticket I get" energy and I feel in that way he is the AH.

[@Mario-SunshineGalaxy64]

Second story should be titled something like: Oh, you like stealing little brown logs? Now you’ll be covered in big brown logs, let’s see if you like it then!

[@SK98765]

Story 1; wife is controlling and not over her ex. Divorce her because this lady should've never gotten into a new relationship at all. Hope you can save your daughter from her inevitable escalation.

[@neopom4206]

It's been a while since i heard a story as ABSOLUTELY UNHINGED as that last one 😂

[@prettygurlrockx]

No way would I have married her if she was desperate to keep her ex’s last name. It should have been clear that she wasn’t over him then, people really be overlooking obvious issues

[@darkmask5933]

Story 1: OP even admits he kind of looks like her ex, although not enough to think it was on purpose. Dude, I'm sorry, it was on purpose. She 100% is pretending you are him, or at least a Diet Version of him. Worst part is, she might not even be aware herself she is doing it. She is a danger to her daughter, and at the very least, the moment she has her daughter alone she is going to try and change the name to the Frankenstein'ed feminine version of her ex's name and tell her daughter that is her real father and OP is an imposter.

[@lhuynh731]

It gonna happened if op didn’t step in to protect her his daughter from her delusional obsessive grieving mothers of hers. Plus all the lies about the dad. The daughter will grow up knowing she’s was lied to by her mom and enabler around. Know the dead man isn’t her father and seeks her real father blowing on her delusional mother and her enabler around her mother.

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

2:42 oh, she’s not over her dead ex and cuz he’s dead, there’s no living up to him.

[@jessicathompson236]

First story; Sounds like she doesn't want to be married to you. She also wants to pretend that your baby is her late husbands child instead of yours. That's messed up. (But to a degree understandable. She still loves him and that probably won't ever change) BUT what she's doing to you and your child is unfair as well. She needs to accept that her children have different fathers. That generally means different surnames.

[@carlrood4457]

It's weird because it's never even been that uncommon. Historically, men died I wars, work accidents, from disease, etc. and women pretty much HAD little choice but remarry and would have children with the new husband. Today, the ease of divorce does the same thing.

[@carlrood4457]

It's weird because it's never even been that uncommon. Historically, men died I wars, work accidents, from disease, etc. and women pretty much HAD little choice but remarry and would have children with the new husband. Today, the ease of divorce does the same thing.

[@catalinacaro8183]

I need the last update of the last story omggg

[@NighDarke]

That first one, he needs to file for permanent full-time custody because she's clearly not okay and that baby is not safe with her. The fact that her parents backed her up shows the baby's not safe with them either so they should not have any visitation. The second one, the fact that he won't name the crime but both he and his girlfriend think it's okay to commit this crime says a lot about their lack of character really. His "you can't tell me what to do" attitude is beyond childish also. I'd like an update after he gets mucked to see how he feels about it all then.

[@hospitalqueen4047]

Im pregnant and not with the dad. If i was then i wouldn't want to name my baby after an ex or give him or her my ex's last name. The wife gets 3.5 out of 5 assholes.

[@tigernotwoods914]

I’ll never understand these situations. You’re pregnant and no longer with the dad then why are you carrying to term? It makes no sense. Why not just abort?

[@hospitalqueen4047]

@tigernotwoods914 because i love my baby. Im not going to murder my baby because im not with the dad. Im blessed God gave me my baby. You're a very rude and not a nice person. You don't have to like that their are women who are single mothers.

[@PinkMarshmallows]

@@tigernotwoods914 Because the person you're replying to has morals and doesn't want to m u r d e r the unborn baby?

[@trillionbones89]

It's understandable that op is so conflicted. So many people are crazy in his environment!

[@Center-For-I.E.D.Mismanagement]

Story 1: If OP called his Ex-wifes bluff, it would have been less paperwork.

[@eldeano9964]

But a shed load more therapy for the son

[@PinkMarshmallows]

@@LostSoulchild89 Oh, I'm sure she meant it. I've know someone who was like the stbx wife and he actually went through with it.

[@gag141]

Story 1 good man getting her crazy self out

[@jmonique6409]

Story 1: This story was stressing me out with how her whole family and deceased husbands family is unhinged. How could they all believe that naming their baby after a man she has no connection to is a good idea. Story 2: I bet the gf is reexamining her whole relationship. The crime he keeps committing may be petty, but its the fact he says he can't and wont stop doing it even with the threat of having literal pig shit dumped on him, should tell her what she needs to know. Most criminals start off with petty crimes, but it doesn't take much for it to evenly escalate into bigger more serious crimes. Especially since he doesn't have/see a problem with it.

[@deirdrelewis1454]

Want to bet the guy facing mucking is smoking weed!

[@jimdob6528]

I thought weed was legal in all of Europe.

[@flamepetals]

​@@jimdob6528Nope. You can buy it in coffee shops in the Netherlands and some other countries have decriminalized it or won't charge you for it up to a certain small amount, but technically it is illegal. Maybe in 50 years.

[@charlotteemerson5050]

I grew up in the country. There is no comparison between horse manure and pig manure. Pig is so much worse in every way you can imagine.

[@someanon1984]

Story 1: That one commenter who said that the ex's actions were premeditated is probably right. I think it would also explain why everyone in that women's life seems to be okay with what she's doing. I think that most people (possibly save for her ex's parents who might still be unable to accept their son's death anyway) would think that this is a crazy idea but given a few years, I think that she could have possibly worked them over to her side. Maybe she would have started small by saying something like she'd like to use his name as a middle name and then just get more and more outrageous over time. Everyone around her would have been like frogs in boiling water so to speak until they were fully on board with her antics. Or maybe they're all just insane and OP only realized that now. Idk. lol

[@meghanmckenzie5273]

Story 1: lady needs help. Poor son though, I hope he can change his name when is out of the house. Story 2: 😂🐷😂...Op is an idiot.

[@LordGertz]

Pig $+ is much, much worse!! And the stigma that would be attached if she stays with OP.

[@hvymax]

Great move registering the name. Crazy Dingbat put in her place. OP should take full custody.

[@lharchmage6908]

Mucking story i worked on a farm when i was a kid and got fell in a pig pen that stuff burns like crazy and takes forever to get rid of the smell. It is not pleasant.

[@norma8686]

In my country it's already hard enough to give a baby their father's surname if the father is deceased by the time the baby is born. Giving a baby someone else's surname would not be allowed under any circumstances.

[@jbgra2566]

First story left me floored. Five, FIVE effing grown adults agreed that OP's daughter should have a dead man's last name and were ok with that. It's so sad op's stbx wife is surrounded by enablers, she will never leave coo coo land

[@camillebellemare7033]

I was REALLY hoping there would be another update to that last one lmao. I just really want to know how it ended lmao. And Markee, I love when you let your personality show. This is exactly why I have been watching you for a few years, and I watch every episode. You make me laugh. I also love when you are able to slip a couch or two in there 😂😂😂. Keep doing what you do. You are AMAZING!

[@SpookiCooki]

Are we in the fucking twilight zone?! Everyone but OP seems to be utterly INSANE in story 1!!

[@pixel9548]

When I was a teen, I lived downwind from a pig farm miles away. If this is for real, I'm horrified for the guy. There's a reason being immersed in crap is often depicted as a torment in Hell.

[@TheSkull698]

OP’s wife is seriously messed up and she clearly still sees her deceased ex as her main relationship. OP is just someone she’s settled for. This is an untenable situation and the fact she wants a baby she had with her current husband to be named after her dead ex is the height of disrespect. Divorce her. Plus her family is nuts.

[@johnnagustafson9996]

Last story....Wow! I hope there is an update after the mucking!

[@sharyebethancourt3660]

OP is just a placeholder for the dead ex. Everyone siding with her sound just as unreasonable as she is.

[@lct1196]

I'm dying for a final update on that last story

[@RagefulJewel]

For anyone confused by the comment read at 13:15, the information mentioned in this comment comes from a reply OP made to someone else's comment. I had to scroll through the OP's account to find this information. Other comments by OP reveal the following: 1. STBX married her deceased husband when she was pregnant with the son. 2. STBX had been with her deceased husband since she was 17. (She is currently 43 from what OP said the comment that mentioned the name change.) 3. Deceased husband died when the son was 10 months old. 4. Deceased husband surname is more aristocratic than OP's surname, which is derived from an occupational trade. 5. OP and STBX met at the son's 2nd birthday party, where he was working as the driver for the caterer. 6. The son is 13 since the name change for both mother and son happened when he was seven, and OP states in the comment that she had her legally had her deceased husband surname for 6 years. However, she started using that name socially 4 years previously. This also means that OP has been in the son's life for 11 years.

[@rmhartman]

"sit there and think about what you've done!"

[@EluneAnzu]

Story 1: wow the wife need major help and the family/friends/ex's family are very much not helping, it sounds like she's trying to cope with the ex's death by naming the kids after him and "replacing" him with the OP since apparently the OP looks like the ex. Also lol at the friends pulling the "IT'S CURRENT YEAR" card with the name, OP's problem was less that the kid wasn't going to share his last name and more that his wife is cuckoo bananas and unhealthily dealing with her dead ex.

[@carolinegreenwell9086]

oh I so much wanted an update to that last story

[@littlegreycat]

14:15 that story is just crazy. I was ready to hear another story like the one where the guy wouldn't allow his wife to use her maiden name or even a hyphenated name

[@nilianstroy]

story 1... i guarantee if op had accepted her delusional demands, the next step was op changing his name to ''match the children''.

[@toriannaward2634]

The second story is hilarious 😂 it feels like an episode of Bojack horseman. Where everyone is collectively having this dramatic ans intense reaction to something..not necessarily mundane, but definitely not really warranting the reaction ans they treat you like you're insane for having a sort of meh response to it

[@cindykq8086]

You’ve never been around pig shit if you’re so ho-hum about. I used to live half a mile from a farm with only 3 pigs. The few times the wind blew to us from the farm-you can’t eat, you’re so completely miserable just from the stench. And if you touch it, the smell sticks to you for days.

[@toriannaward2634]

@cindykq8086 it's true, I haven't. And I'm not saying it'll be a breeze, I mean...yeah, it'll suck. But everyone in this guy's life is acting as if he's getting life in prison and being a black person in the US of A...this sort of punishment DOES feel a bit laughable to me