"EVERYTHING You Think You Know About Yourself Is WRONG!" (How To Find Yourself) | Mark Manson

[@lemon1lemons2]

not interrupting any guests and not creating an awkward environment are some of things I respect from Tom. well done and keep up the good work.

[@avalerionbass]

Whoa... The part of him talking about wanting to be a musician and there was a period of mourning hit pretty hard to me. I am a musician of 24 years (still am) but had to give up all my dreams of "making it big" because I realized that a life of stability meant more to me than the fame that I thought I wanted. I had devoted SO much of my life to that aspect, constantly practicing, learning new instruments, working crap serving jobs so that I had the flexibility to schedule shows and performances. Eventually I realized that I will ALWAYS love, play, and write music, but I no longer had the desire to make that most defining quality. I definitely felt a period of mourning, almost as though I betrayed the essence of who I am. I've since acquired a career in computer programming, have a stable income and plan for my future, still play and write music but I only do it for me, and I have the income to further follow my musical interests, but it was that moment of saying "this is just a hobby, not a career" that hit the hardest.

[@Jason-ji4sy]

Way to give up on your dreams.

[@avalerionbass]

@@Jason-ji4sy Just because you have dreams doesn't mean they end up being what you wanted. Desires change as you grow and the more you follow your dreams the more the reality of what's required to achieve that becomes apparent. To me, the reward wasn't worth all the sacrifice. It was tough to let go of something I had worked for so long on, but that's life. Relationships work the same way. No matter how much you want it to work out with someone and no matter how long you've been together, at some point you gotta admit that it's not gonna work out the way you want. Don't be so judgmental. If you haven't experienced this at some point then you haven't lived very long and you have no room to speak.

[@BebeSoule]

Giving up so easily, we all know what's best for us deep down though.

[@avalerionbass]

Dedicating 24 years of your life to a craft before going a different direction is not giving up easily.

[@BebeSoule]

@@avalerionbass True that, true that, that's already a lifetime.

[@Continental123-i2n]

Tom always has the best questions----- The way he phrases them is really really insightful---- And then actually ALLOWS the guest to answer Without interrupting. Thank you Tom.

[@averhamilton8823]

YO SERIOUSLY YES! Him not interrupting is SOOO awesome

[@righteousreasons4396]

Best non bias interviewer I've ever seen..Allows his guests to really feel comfortable in showing who they are the way they want to...vs how other shows have a narrative and direction that either the show or some publicist is pushing for..Tom...You have the most sincere way of talking to people when you interview them..Genuinely think that everyone that comes on your show, you have hand picked out of your own interests and wanted to give the individual a platform so that you could share with the world what you have found and letting the person tell it for themselves vs people that get information and regurgitate it back as either their own or you get the grapevined version of what they remember they heard. Salute and Congrats on the 1Million..You Earned It.

[@ibperson7765]

Yeah he’s very good. I wish when guest dont answer the question he’d mention or re-ask. He sometimes asks a great question and the guest goes on an aside and forgets, or just avoids it.

[@darrebell3086]

Good SH!T man 👨 MY MAIN MAN 👨 MY MAN...•••^^^***{REDUNDANT WITH A SLIGHT TWIST IS A FUN DIFFERENTIAL IN LEARN & 🔃🎶🎵💱♾yearningly stepping into your/okay my discomfort!-);(.... yo /yo don’t sleep 🛏 on 💤 that 😴 butterfly 🦋 effect 🔂Son!-);( KID 🧒)🔄

[@joyfulsavage9905]

Very astute comment 🤓

[@PracticalInspiration]

Creating a life with better problems. Fantastic, as people we naturally crave problems to solve so it's important to seek problems you take pleasure in resolving, rather than problems imposed on you.

[@woq3158]

"it's important to seek problems you take pleasure in resolving, rather than problems imposed on you." You need to seriously reconsider what you're trying to say here. It's akin to telling someone that the comfort zone is where they want to be. Dogshit advice at face value

[@TinoMT]

there is a seeking, yes. But it ain't a made up "naturally crave problems" concept

[@loumason6120]

After hearing this interview I wouldn't be interested in reading His book let alone paying for it..And that decision is coming from My past, present and future thought(s) and feelings. As a musician You will always have Your ass handed to You or any other profession for that matter. There's a dark overtone to His thinking and to Me doesn't go with true personal growth. Now He's the rockstar he always wanted to be but with a different instrument, that's cool and all but it's nothing new or extra ordinary.

[@woq3158]

@@loumason6120 "And that decision is coming from My past, present and future thought(s) and feelings." this is physically impossible. All decisions are made from a relative present.

[@maccasnz3436]

@@loumason6120 he did advise people to not take him too seriously so...

[@henkvanderklok]

You don't choose a life, you choose a set of problems. - Thank you Mark Manson.

[@jaxx-inspiregrowcreate2862]

*”The mind is everything. What we think we shall become.”*

[@shaileshshrestha3495]

That's GREAT Tom!- will be 2M soon

[@daniellesevolution]

“You are not your mind.” -Eckhart Tolle The mind is a tool, a piece of our consciousness.

[@avamasquerade]

Or we think about what we are becoming. Don't like who you're becoming? Then stop trying to manipulate your own thinking/perceptions and *take action.*

[@ajayreddy8732]

The Buddha said that.

[@jaxx-inspiregrowcreate2862]

@@ajayreddy8732 that's right brother

[@vivrantthings]

"There are a lot of things that feel good that are actually hurting you".

[@nararabbit1]

Yep, and things can be painful but not harmful. Sometimes the most painful experiences are the ones I needed the most.

[@justgreg2790]

Mourning your old self is one of the hardest journeys. The relationships, the friendships, the idea of success, values and perspective of priority all change. Each one takes you through an internal paradigm shift. I’m still grieving the idea of who I used to be.

[@constance4065]

Just Greg Me too Greg!!

[@JjBianca]

So interesting. I think we all die and reborn during this life. Maybe some pay attention more than others.

[@nocando89]

Looks like a lot of us are going through similar things.

[@plantmama7442]

The hardest for me is how I let the old me be treated...never again.

[@ritah4713]

@@Δενβρισκωνικ lol perhaps you're not thinking enough. Losing integral aspects of yourself is definitely a thing.

[@alexxandra11r]

"what is the pain that gets YOU going?" find that one thing that most people find painfully hard to do, yet for you it just... flows.

[@ovidiudrobota2182]

Da. Ai dreptate Alexandra. :)

[@edwintepuendikum3527]

Perfect 🙏🏿🙏🏿

[@unboundfull]

“He who has a why to live can bear almost any how” - Friedrich Nietzsche

[@marim7784]

Good advice. Another fellow Romanian here.

[@edwintepuendikum3527]

So true

[@eleonorabergthorsdottir1445]

This guy is phenomenal. He really has the gift to put into words and organize all the messy thoughts and feelings one has. A great episode! Thank you :)

[@JustHindiFootball]

@@bobrisse9823 Exactly put

[@GarettChamberlin]

@@JustHindiFootball A little late but...... damn strait

[@9Nikko8]

@@bobrisse9823 huh?

[@TheHorseshoePartyUK]

TL:DW all your name is for, is for others to say 'hey you fellow brain inside a skeleton'

[@mariezenaida]

This is so fascinating. I am also someone who didn't finish music school. I chose to shelve that identity of becoming an opera singer, then reframed it later on, completing a recital which I am proud of, one accomplished on top of a sickness and vocal crisis at that. Am I a pro opera singer? Hell no. Do I still consider myself a singer, which I still enjoy doing, simply for the pleasure of it? Yes. I feel we sometimes cling so hard to an identity that if things don't work out according to expectations, it's all-or-nothing. It doesn't have to be that way.

[@williamkreth]

I always write down the why after I write out each goal. It makes you realize which goals are truly important, and which ones are just an ego stroke. This video is wonderful! I will be getting both the books he has written!

[@osse1n]

*Become shapeless, become formless, be like water.* Adapt to survive is the best possible motto.

[@MX-CO]

F that Choose your path , decide what makes you happy and go get it, adapting is something we are all capable of but why would you want to ?

[@healthiswealth2858]

So true

[@MKBontwikkeling]

Bruce Lee

[@yomanspray]

Bruce lee

[@oxyrisin]

Tarz Thomas This makes complete sense and i live by it. Bruce Lee originally said it. Adaptation is in the sense of achieving your goals, not to conforming to social norms. You can’t change the external world.but through adaptation, you can use their BS for your own, personal goals w out compromising who you are. That’s my take anyway.

[@WhataboutBob74126]

I could relate to this interview in a very powerful way. I failed at so many self-concepts to the point of what's the point of being anything of value. Sometimes you have to have a breakdown to have a break through! My break through came when someone in a recovery meeting said: "Everyday involves decisions and choices - just for today, I choose to be a builder in life and not a destroyer!". I think the whole point of performing a personal moral inventory is to peel away each layer of narrative, working towards the core where you are rewarded with having your spiritual awakening. My experience was extraordinarily different. When I embraced the identity of being a "Builder in Life" - which is more of a spiritual identity - and my purpose is to build safe, healthy relationships thereby promoting safety and civility wherever I am, my spiritual self broke through all the outer narratives and introduced itself: "Hi, my name is Bobby and I'm a "Builder in Life". I chose to write out my own personal "Identity and Life Mission Statement" which serves as my personal "Spiritual Compass" that keeps on course in performing my daily tasks! It makes my daily inventory so much simpler - just weed out the harmful, self-defeating narratives and embrace the helpful helpful narratives that is conducive to who I am and what my purpose is. With regard to whatever endeavor, talents, occupations or passions in life - I can seek these and make them a part of my identity in a building capacity. The world needs physicians, politicians, ministers, CEO's, teachers, laborers, janitors, etc - who are builders! The world is screaming for safe and civil communities! Knowing who I am in life makes my decision making so much simpler! A builder in life has better problems than those that are associated with destroyers. Thanks for this interview video!!!!

[@MichaelGordon]

Initially I thought the whole use of the term “F*cking” was just a ploy for book sales, I am happy to be incorrect. I highly respect Mark’s point of view and look forward to diving in… Ironically my wife had bought me “The subtle art of not giving a f*ck” book a while back… I am finally going to crack it open. Thank you both for a great interview.

[@faybelle2991]

No, it's a gimmick. Everything is in this world.

[@palatablejohnson5732]

"Crack it open"

[@pugtortuga3406]

Michael Gordon it’s a marketing ploy, it’s also a old concept. Trillions of us have adopted that phrase long before Mark was even born. Zillions will following us having never heard of it. Yet, his book is exquisite and timeless. Hope you enjoyed reading it.

[@markothwriter]

I liked his first book but after that he just re-hashes the same stuff.

[@munirshemsu6994]

Same here

[@julierossbrickley146]

Grief and Mourning of loosing a part of you...BOOM! The year my last kid went off to college was so hard, I actually described it as going through a death and the person that died was ME. I lost my job (Mom), my friends, my social structures changed...my whole identity changed. I'm going through that again now after having to close a thriving business following a car accident. It messes with you! Choosing to give them up something valuable is one thing, but having it ripped from you is sooo much more. So here I am, reinventing myself again, trying to find something new to give a f*ck about. Thanks for sharing... Gotta get the books.

[@costascostas1760]

I know how you felt. I lost my mum (was lookig after her for a few years) and then my ex a second time (i felt i was supporting her all the whike she had already found someone lese) and I was left with no identity. In process of finding me again.

[@julierossbrickley146]

@Ilir Cami yes, and that's a whole other story!

[@mammadingo9165]

Yes I feel like I had been killed internally by dramatic traumatic changes ...a big part of me died

[@mammadingo9165]

@@julierossbrickley146 thankyou for sharing .

[@titlespree]

It all starts with self introspection, knowing your strengths and weaknesses. Also nothing is fixed, change is always possible. Even personalities can change!

[@faybelle2991]

Personalities never change. My family are all better off dead.

[@sadigov]

@@msmorgangayle one can even learn how to spell. Boom!

[@DiogenesNephew]

@@faybelle2991 They CAN change. Doesn't mean they will change.

[@jaykash9091]

the fuck its not, fate n destiny are unchangeable always Fixed no mater wut way u go u always end up the same place reguardless wut path you took to get there n U snd snyone who believes otherwise are God damn stupid fux

[@eligrace6707]

@@jaykash9091 nah you the one that’s stupid af, how about stop projecting your limitations on everyone else. YOU decide how YOUR Life will be it’s not already written it’s being written every day it’s up to you to change that, blaming it on fate or destiny is just a childish excuse sorry.

[@inspireyourselfnow]

I love the way he's talking and explaining. Everything makes sense. And also Tom did an amazing job with this questions. It was a really insightful experience. Thank you

[@miguelangelsalazartenorio621]

Know just

[@Yoyoyo224]

7 months passed whatt changed ?

[@dallassings8062]

“We’re all masochistic to something in life “ wow, so many layers to how good that is!

[@littleoceandrop]

sending love to all of you , if you are here, you are my people ;)

[@jaykash9091]

fuck U, im not ur "PPL". But speaking of fuck them to..... 🖕 🥶🖤

[@animiteva6122]

Tom, your channel is officially the most amazing thing that exists on KZbin. THANK YOU.

[@MlleCarocks]

"The concept of your self is built out of the narratives that we create out of our experiences" - very insightful

[@gremorychanel4426]

Hello person scrolling through comments. May luck be by your side.

[@gamingwithblis6709]

Thank you

[@ellayouel2489]

And yours Gremory Chanel.Thank you x

[@LiftNBalance]

it's a great day to have a day🤙

[@sophiawalker4068]

What a sweet message! Love and light to you xx

[@anikinkid]

It's 0% luck 100% mindset

[@william7yifans]

the way tom's smile slowly widens at 39:50 as he's processing mark's words and thinking about how deeply that represents him is so representative of what makes these conversations great

[@TheScottGillies]

THE SECOND YOU SAID "Mourning" I TOTALLY KNEW WHERE YOU WERE GOING!! Ego deaths are a helluva thing!

[@viswavijeta5362]

7:40 visualize what it's like to not have something that you value. Visualize not wanting that fleat of boats, who you would be if you do not desire what you desire. 25:00 what you do effortlessly others have to go through a lot of pain and stress to do that. You gotta find your effortless work.

[@camandjaiden]

Tom, this is going to be another one of your interviews I come back to over and over again. Thank you for putting out such amazing content, I am not sure you will ever comprehend the changes you've created in so many peoples lives. Truly grateful.

[@constance4065]

Cam and Jaiden I TOTALLY AGREE!!!!

[@valerijavranjes9937]

Couldn't agree more on this! This show has became such a pivotal part of my upgrading as a person and learning about world!! Thank you Tom, keep up the amazing work!!

[@camandjaiden]

@@valerijavranjes9937 Totally! He has single handedly changed my life!

[@jbLR218]

It’s amazing how we are constantly led to exact what we need in each moment. Although this video was made a year ago, I found it and watched it today and it was absolutely amazing, life changing, eye opening, and perfectly in line with what I needed right now! Thank you so much, Tom and Mark for sharing such amazing content!! 🥳❤️🙌🏻

[@nadlei3270]

This guy is so brilliant. Changed my perspective a whole lot.

[@dronesandnature]

🌱🌱Great questions: What do I want to struggle with? What problems do I want? What pain gets me going? What do I value? What helpful and useful narratives am I creating/re-writing from my life experiences? Love Newton's laws of emotions... ✔✔Congrats on 1 million!

[@AvecGracey]

“Act in such a way that you treat humanity, whether in your own person or in the person of any other, never merely as a means to an end, but always at the same time as an end.”

[@chessdude67]

I learned to solve a Rubik's Cube at 59 years young. It's never too late...

[@brittanynicole4370]

chessdude67 Lol!!! Congrats!

[@chessdude67]

Brittany Barr Thank you! 🙏

[@chessdude67]

TR P Thanks TR P! 👍

[@BenokanobiSama]

Congratulations @chessdude67 Super Awesomeness in play.. I was born when my dad turn 54 on 1975. We can't grow old until we allowed us too. I gonna think about something to learn too. So Chessdude, I wish you all the best in beating your own time score perhaps with 2 cubes?

[@chessdude67]

@@BenokanobiSama Thank you so much, BenokanobiSama!! Thank you for sharing a bit of your story. My mom and dad were 47 years old when I was born. My older brother was 20 years old and in the Army when I showed up, lol!! I am now taking guitar lessons along with cubing! So far I'm loving it. I was a professional Drummer for 40 years or so. I love learning new things! Learn, my new friend and please share with me again. Best to you! Take care. 👍🏼👍🏼✌🏼

[@EliaCanu]

Congrats on 1 Million! Well deserved, Tom!

[@momona7637]

Elia Canu Yes he deserves more.

[@EliaCanu]

@@momona7637 for sure!

[@TheErow44]

Agree, I honestly just feel bad that 99.9% of people in the world AREN’T subscribed!! You’ve got your work cut out for you Tom!! Hope you live to be 500 years old and touch the lives of every single person on Earth

[@EliaCanu]

@@TheErow44 👍

[@gracyru8806]

@@EliaCanu for sure! And congrats to all the new subscribers. This channel will have such a great impact on their lives. I know it has helped me change my mindset. 💃

[@andrewanderson6618]

Once I was told to sit in front of a mirror, introduce myself to myself. "You at first you won't get passed hello but if you keep it up you will end up having deep conversations with yourself". Unfortunately I didn't have the courage to begin. I now feel that I need too

[@cortexleadershipconsulting2107]

Watching Tom’s time with guests is a masterclass for me in creating valuable conversations. I am a huge fan of this show!

[@Im1BossyChick]

I even love how Tom gives hugs, so genuine, appreciative, & humble. I just love this guy!

[@joyfullmom0068]

There you go again with that listening into my life and knowing what I'm struggling with. Just realizing last night and today that I generally hold a definition of myself as inherently broken. I'm hoping this realization will help me get to the next level and stop spolinning my wheels.

[@sunrise_dog6475]

Same lady. Sending love, light and strength your way

[@alinashah4803]

This book helped me get out of the worst depression. I was broken and mentally and emotionally suffering after faces many traumatic experiences. I highly recommend everyone to read this book. It's a gem. Easily helps you pull yourself together and how to make yourself a priority.

[@MrUniqueLiving]

Tom hitting 1 Mil and having my favorite blogger/author on Impact Theory. I'm crying tears of Fu**ing joy

[@ericvela4087]

11:33 "the why behind what you do is more important" oh my god ive thought this myself and hearing it finally from someone else is just amazing. Very hard point for most people to understand is what i have found out

[@comdrive3865]

Yes. it's like mark manson has been attacking problems for so long that he speaks more normal sense to those who are trying to figure it all out too.

[@pohkeee]

36 minutes on...you construct yourself, so you can equally empower yourself to reconstruct yourself. Bonus happiness if the new you is worthy of self-esteem.

[@comdrive3865]

23:00 is one of the most fascinating stories. Even hearing it spoken like that is good. What comes natural for some is what they're designed and aligned to keep doing, when you find that sweet spot for you, you just keep doing it and progress will come.

[@lylan8737]

I literally cried how he is right about the fact that our identity is build from our experiences in childhood and how we stumble upon same situations all our lives and we dont know why that is. The question is what to do when we are unable to find new identity and our old one is fucked up

[@harveylin3548]

"drama of the gifted child" by Alice Miller, matter of fact, all her books.

[@rockynenshati7391]

I tore my ACL during soccer game when young. I held a grudge about it for years convinced it ruined my potential. Ive always sombered over decitions I wouldnt have made had I known better or had control. I also often put myself In other peoples shoes and wish I could help. The best advice I can give is grow out of it. My injury made me realize things I otherwise wouldn't have.

[@barrieevans890]

Great interview. Thanks for giving your guest the space to be himself. I only started learning about Mark Manson and his views on “self-help” in the last few days. What I appreciate about your style is that you allow me to learn about your guest rather than learn only how you view your guest.

[@MF_OXF]

Hands down my favourite channel on KZbin, thank you 3000, Tom!!!

[@violandabeer1340]

How come we say hands down? I don't understand the positive of that phrase is all. I just don't get it. Shouldn't we say hands held high? Like raise and praise? Just a thought.

[@MF_OXF]

@@violandabeer1340 "hands down phrase of hand easily and decisively. "Swindon won hands down" synonyms: easily, effortlessly, with ease, with no trouble, with very little trouble, without effort, with very little effort; informal by a mile, no sweat"

[@ananastea]

Emmanouil Filippidis that was just a thought about its origins I think

[@aprilalt8806]

Tom is such a brilliant interviewer. He asks the questions people want to know in the most profound ways. His introductions are brilliant as well! Fantastic channel. I especially loved and agreed with the concept at the end of the interview to help people see different perspectives. That's what I want to do.

[@crisg.6236]

Wow! This is some good stuff right here. I teach Emotional Intelligence and tend to be in contrast with what a lot of other people in the space say b/c there is SO much (wrong) advocacy that (a) your emotions are crazy and only your logic is "intelligence" , (b) the goal is to use only logic and subdue emotion as much as possible = No. Nuh-uh. and NOPE! Not true. Our emotions, as Mark says here, are the more powerful driver. The goal is not to shut that down but to use logic to help give direction (not take over driving) ... there is a lot of smart, smart stuff in this interview. Too many great points to comment on. Mark's pragmatic explanations of this stuff is spot on!

[@krshrv]

i am usually wary of pop-psych interviews with authors billed as "entrepreneurs" due to the seemingly inevitable conflation of "success" with "wealth" and "personal power", but i was delighted to hear this guy unpack those mistakes right up front. this is a very cogent discussion of the importance of ethics in self-development, with some helpful new perspectives on the usual tropes of self-help formulas.

[@jimmyhe2967]

"Pick your damn suffering." ---Jordan Peterson, oh btw get him on the show Tom

[@willemiennel8585]

Oh yes! FANTASTIC IDEA!

[@mrknarf4438]

Find the greatest rock you can carry and carry it. This guy is also saying: yes, but find the rock shaped in a way that fits your arms, and if you've picked up the wrong rock it's ok to mourn for it when you decide to change it. But find a shape that fits you, only then you'll be able to lift a great rock, and only of that particular shape.

[@crappykeys]

Stumbled upon this show just now. What a talk. Hats off to both men here. The questions and answers were both amazing. Specially the pace of the discussion. The clarity with which both of them are speaking here is crystal clear.

[@MightyKern]

This interview was so amazing. He said some of the most amazing insights I have ever heard, It all just really made a lot of sense to me. Thank you for this interview!

[@cristinemackenzie2989]

I started to get curious about his book. This guy Mark Manson. Every word he said is exactly speak with my experience in my self. It's amazing how the host able to deliver the important question that the viewer has no idea that is absolutely an important question until it's being asked. Two thumbs up.

[@thecelestialheart]

Yup, the whole thing you said about mourning an identity. I did that too. I was a musical theater student and there was an aspect of it that i loved so much, but there was something about it that i did not like at all. I tasted that shit sandwich, now i am trying a different one. It definitely felt like a break up, i cried for a whole plane ride when i realized it wasnt for me anymore. Hehe.

[@lilydalesierra]

The Celestial Heart oh my gosh I can relate. I mourned not having a nuclear family for so long... I look back now and realize how much time I wasted in mourning a value that wasn’t meant for me.

[@ernestbuckley8671]

Thx for sharing. What are you doing now? Did you discover your true calling/purpose?

[@thecelestialheart]

@@ernestbuckley8671 Hi there! I have discovered my true calling. My childhood left clues. After graduating college with a communications degree, I am now pursuing art, painting and healing. I have spent the past few months doing some journaling to heal my past self and also learning how to draw more seriously. I am giving myself till the end of the year to just play with the process and next year I will be sharing what I make.

[@ernestbuckley8671]

@@thecelestialheart 🙏❤️🙏

[@thecrochetlady]

i find myself catching a thought one of your guests says, then my mind starts to wonder (not wander) in all sorts of thinking directions and then i have to rewind some key points made throughout the presentation. i watched your show for the first time over two years ago and i am grateful to have found my way back to your channel

[@darrebell3086]

the crochet lady My 🌲 first time watching him,(Tom/&\his guest Mark Manson 👨..... WOW 😯 TIMELY STUFF...( attitude n gratitude 🙏🏽 for all I find on my renewals of Journey (~$~).....( your community comment inspired me to type this one ☝️ out....( so tyvm 4 your shared synergy o f thought 💭 $ ( the crochet 🧶 lady : ):(🦋❣️🎯📶🎦🔔✨⚡️♾💱📝🔂🔃🔄🐢🎶🎵💡💫🚸🙃😇🙂✅🎦🎦🎦🐢🎶🎵💡💫✨💜🖤💟🧡♎️☸️☦️☯️🆔⚛️📳✴️🈷️♒️✝️🛐💓💞💗💖💝💘💔🧡❣️💕💛💚💙❤️

[@jackcarlos]

Great question "what about people that don't know their identity or what they want to be". Wish he gave us more on that question. How do we find our passion, niche, thing in life that drives us, especially knowing that most people (other musicians in Mark's case) are way better than us?

[@ShaunPrince]

I love this interview setting, the absolutely relevant topics, and these insanely detailed description with time markers.

[@TheZGALa]

I fluctuate between high and low self esteem lots of times most of days...

[@ohara128]

I think the best thing Tom does as an interviewer is he is always asking his guests, "How do you do that"? after every point..just dives deeper and deeper into practical actions from the points his guests are making. Instead of his guests going over broad concepts and ideas that people can't utilize.

[@WorldRenounced]

This guy is a great interviewer, asks really interesting questions and is an excellent listener too. Subscribed!

[@RecaJ333]

Just finished Marks book and wow. just wow. i'm so grateful to have been able to access and read it.

[@energygiver]

Possibly my Favourite Episode yet!!! Wow!

[@hanakokibrework1388]

One of the things i enjoy most about this show is how Tom Bilyeu always asks the right questions.

[@xuanius]

Tom has an extremely rare ability to bring out other people’s genius. You can see it in his intros where he distills each person’s accomplishments down to their best essence. A lot of guests make the same comment about his intros :)

[@daniellesevolution]

You’re the best interviewer I could ask for. Congrats on 1MIL! 🥳🤩❤️

[@NitemareAfterKrismas]

Tom’s always such a great interviewer. He’s got this amazing talent to be in conversations, and to truly listen to his guests. It’s awesome.

[@tbd5082]

Tom Is the best interviewer!!

[@grumpyschnauzer]

I don’t know why I thought it is appropriate to put this here but this is what I thought after listening to Mark Manson speak so profoundly: I couldn’t remember why, when I was 15, a man yelled at me, “Women like you burn down churches”. I cried like a baby to my mom because he hurt my feelings. Now I remember... he was a recovering 40 year old addict from pills and prostitution, a born again Christian. We got into a debate about the existence of God. I told him religion is a crutch... it stops us from being our most authentic transparent selves and living our most authentic life... it also paints people into two corners “good” and “evil”. It inspires moralistic values as well but it also teaches people how to get away with being crappy individuals by hiding behind religious beliefs. Anyways, somehow listening to Mark Manson speak prompted this reflect to which I never had the answer to. I’ve learned to observe that faith and spirit exists within us and we have a personal relationship with spirit that can be externalized and shared through religion or internalized and enjoyed through self... nonetheless it’s personal. Also love a reflective chat! Thanks!

[@aminalovewaz]

Great show Tom! Mark has definitely opened my mind to new ways of teaching emotional intelligence - "which shitsandwich do you prefer?" Brilliant!

[@allisonb.8492]

Tom is an amazing interviewer and listener. You can tell he is very down to earth and has worked his ass off for the career that he has!

[@abdullkadiribrahim730]

Wonderful.. Mark Manson you will always remain in my mind wat a marvelous interview.

[@tyvanhworkout]

Love the conversation about what one does that just comes naturally and no matter how difficult or frustrating, it doesn't seem to require the discipline and effort as it does for others for whom it doesn't come so easily or naturally, or as other things that are difficult for you. Those things we need to pay attention to. Love this.

[@kenzie9501]

God. . i cried. Just ultra emotional anyway. Tired of getting in the way of myself. 🤦🙅

[@lyndsieannette957]

Good realization to have!

[@benjaminbrown4740]

Cuz you are an object subject to being a reflex all this time.. this is why I get frustrated when I go into ‘nature’ the concrete jungle that is. #wisest

[@avidborn]

Its sooooo f''ing easy to talk about success AFTER your already there lets see somebody do it b4 and then actually accomplish it. That is somebody I will listen to with conviction.

[@gersonllames7367]

You got 1M already Tom, you're the man. Congrats!

[@kreativepulp8760]

You know... as much as I love your introductions, I get super excited when you utter the words, "so please! Help me in welcoming". I love it Tom.

[@magicmegan4290]

Oh my gosh I love this! Just leanred about this guy, but I have always said and thought his exact philosophical ideas!! I Love deep psychology, learning about our inner self. It's like a deep canyon of never ending discovery about ourselves yet we keep changing and growing, so our learning about ourselves never ends. I routinely connect to the Grief Stages, and even with grieving self-death. A self-death can just happen to one value of many we hold. I believe we go through many stages of processes that lead us to make decisions. The stages of grief begins with denial and ultimately ends with acceptance. I believe the path of enlightenment is ultimately a path of acceptance of who we are, and the healing of the belief that we are not enough. The earliest story of man kind was a story about Adam and Eve and the fall of man. It began when Eve went to the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. When the serpant told her she "wasn't enough," she believed. She believed she was depraved even BEFORE she acted and ultimately depraved is what she and Adam became. Sin is simply decribed by "missing the mark." We believe we are not enough, so we crave and take. The grass is always greener on the other side and we don't see what we have. Our glass is half empty because we see and feel a lack. I think dying of self is learning to see the full. Dying of the need to fill the hole. To accept we are enough. And be happy for the good and stop hurting, taking and destroying self, people, nation's, and this planet. The reason Jesus said (I think), "the Kingdom is heaven is near" is because if we all believed and had the perspective that we are enough and accepted, the way Adam and Eve should have believed in the garden, our world would be a healed place. Is it possible? If one man can be healed, can we all someday reach it together at once? That's the heaven and Utopia, rest, peace and acceptance & belonginga. The reason I love health and got into it is because one day I discovered I had a feeling of Injustice in our health system not treating patients at the root cause of disease as it's primary mission. So now one of my passions is acting as an equalizer to that Injustice because I feel that pain of what I see wrong in our world. What we do is to equilize pain. And those actions will either take from others or give to others. Jesus said it's better to give than to receive. When we give, we become grateful of what we have and we die of our needs. We become full. When we take and harm, we are covering pain (ourselves and others), yet feeding depravity instead of the person who can be sacrificial toward others and yet be full and have love, and be accepting and forgiving. I think this is why we know gratitude is very healing because it changes our story. I always think of the alcoholics anonymous prayer to have to grace accept what we cannot change, and to have the courage to change what we know we can, to heal. One thing I think we can learn to change is our perspective. When you start questioning things about who you are you gain perspective. Wouldn't that be cool if we as all humans could do that as a whole! We're going to need to if we don't want to destroy ourselves and our planet Earth. Fucking LOVE Mark Manson!

[@demonicsweaters]

What I love about your podcast/youtube show, is it's always so elevating, inspiring, and positive. So many podcasts are full of negativity and people complaining about the modern world. You are like a breath of fresh air.

[@LoftBallerina]

Great interview! Absolutely relatable for me at the moment! I finally realized my favorite shit sandwich flavor! I spent years in the fitness industry because I was good at it, but I started dreading everything about it, so I never got ahead on many projects. Because what I really wanted to do was to teach ballet to adults and dance and be immersed in the dance world, yet I relegated that to second place because I though it was too niche. Now that I am focusing 100% on actually doing what I love and put ballet at the center of my work and graduate research , everything is going great and I embrace projects with incredible passion! Thanks guys! And congrats Tom !!!

[@jerrystevens4823]

This was me when I was became an MLO, now I'm pursuing Acting and salsa/bachata dancing!

[@simrankapoor1610]

Your words are like more meaningfully musical to my mind than music can ever sounds like

[@companybroadcast2890]

This guy opened my eyes when I read his book and helped me separate the truth from the bull**hit

[@LiftNBalance]

Literal Mind Control 🤯hah!

[@companybroadcast2890]

@@LiftNBalance yup, based on my experiences I can assure that he has achieved a higher consciousness(through experience, suffering and meditation). He just destroyed the ra ra bull**it of motivational speakers in his first book

[@OM10PYE]

I think the reason why I get along with his books so well is because they reach out to me in such an amazing way. It's practical and has really worked so far for me. I feel so much happier and successful from reading his books!

[@Irina-ks4bj]

Wow this was an incredible talk. Thank you Tom for bringing in Mark Manson. I read his book and could relate to his kind of thinking and you asked powerful questions. Accepting the truth about not knowing who you are is exactly where I am right now minus the accepting part. How do I convince myself that it is ok to not know where I am headed at this time? :)

[@MrWarriorofpeace]

I bloody love this channel listenened to it all day today whilst gardening. Mind explosions all day long

[@bnsgokugreat]

Update guys! Completed reading another book. Book count : 105 :)

[@MX-CO]

What have you learned ? Have you Applied any of it ?

[@rijeshtuladhar12579]

Your best book till now?

[@bnsgokugreat]

great fighter 1) Mindset 2) Atomic Habits 3) Sleep Smarter :)

[@bnsgokugreat]

Real Rulzz Start with Mindset :)

[@bnsgokugreat]

Tarz Thomas I have learnt a lot and I try to incorporate them in my life :)

[@Robustacap]

What Mark Manson describes in the beginning, of letting go of music, I experienced as a recovering addict. There's a period or mourning indeed, and the way it made me understand that our self image, our own story could get often very distorted. that it was about narratives and stories, as I became to think that self is an illusion in the end. And it's not horrible, it is actually liberating. but I am still on the ground and try to keep an open mind set.

[@martinazelenkova6630]

I just love this guy

[@azazelswings6194]

I suffer with ptsd that loves to hang out with anxiety who drags depression along for the party and my life has been a shit show for the longest time. I ignored and shoved down all my mental issues and the issues and drama that came along with the facade I had to hide my true self from the world. I felt out of control, definitely never took responsibility for my actions and because I felt that my mental health was an excuse to be a fucking mess. I have gone to therapy and was placed in a group therapy and it fucking sucked.. I felt like I was so much worse off then the next person, basically, mental gymnastics to find any excuse to leave and let my depression tell me I was a lost cause. I had seen the subtle art.. and I laughed at it, like how in the fuck can any book help.. I finally got around to having a chance to open it up and the best part I felt like I was finally understanding what it truly means to not give a fuck in the most proper way. A month later I read everything is fucked, I love the sarcastic writing, but that was the one that brought me to tears and the fact I needed to take control of myself and my emotional state because I was setting fire to everyone around me. It is still a rough road to making changes to my personal outlook on life. This book hit me hard and I needed that hard slap in the face to help me start to reset myself. I still have bad days but I don't beat myself up for as much anymore and I really focus on the fact I can't let my emotions control me

[@amybeard2054]

Loved The Subtle Art and know that this book will be equally as awesome. Thanks for another great interview and another book to add to my reading list. Well done!!

[@barista5416]

My getting around to reading his works has been one of the many turning points in my life .

[@yungavydash]

FOR THOSE THAT HAVE BIG DREAMS: keep striving even through the hardest times.

[@kenduejones]

Always

[@haideraliansari211]

this is the first episode i watched from beginning to the very end.. amazing knowledge. thank you

[@a7xfanben]

His books are very good. Thanks for having him on!

[@meowmeow1786]

In that painful mode of indentity shift right now. Traumatic experiences reoccur and there's this part of me that knows that changing this meaning around why and who i am as a person will be uncomfortable and life changing. This interview and the book by Viktor Frankl taught and gifted in his analysis and his recreating of his experiences in Nazi Germany where he endured unexplainable, unimaginable pain and suffering. And that's where he wrote his study on the Meaning of Suffering through the theory he founded in Logotherapy. Brilliant interview! All of Mark Manson's words topple and stir in the meanings and wisdoms he's read and researched through his own life. And it's all too eye opening and grateful for me, as 19 year old who is still continuously battling with childhood traumas and identity because why not? There's more to life I believe, and love every interview that sheds light on this. Can't wait for more! :)

[@Spiral.Dynamics]

I was just telling my sister this yesterday. She’s not concerned about our mother gaining 8 pounds since she moved into a nursing home because she has been overweight all her life. I’m the thin sister and my reaction was concern. (😲 Eight pounds!!) You can change your life if you change identity. Change your story. How do you begin doing that? Try Psycho Cybernetics

[@Spiral.Dynamics]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/mWHOhqWYrZd9l7M

[@precon1]

What Mark said about doing something that makes you lose track of time, well I was designing a character while listening to this session and I literally thought its only been like 5 minutes, turns out, i heard the entire clip. Feels good. Thank you Guys.

[@graememac376]

Congrats on the million mark Tom. Thanks for all the knowledge you share 🤙🏻

[@agag4866]

Now we all have to practice all this knowledge. Good luck! Without action it's just words.

[@sa-le4mj]

Wow, I was literally talking about this today with my significant other. I had woken up today, had a cup of tea which I try to make my morning routine and wrote a list of my values. Its been on my mind for a long time, but I've never actually sat down and wrote them out. I had picked up this book years ago, read some of it and got distracted as I often do. Then today this video popped up in my recommendations. Amazing. Thanks for the content, its much appreciated. I love this kind of stuff, although its quite new to me.

[@happyagarwal9506]

Congratulations Lisa mam and tom sir finally reached the landmark of impact family Be legend!!!

[@raddadization]

41:10 is gold. healthy habit of challenging yourself. ding ding

[@silviahoffmann158]

My god! U read my mind. This is exactly what I needed today

[@taniamarshall9327]

Wow I avoided this vid for the longest time but once again @Tombilyeu and the gang bring it home! And with 1 million subscribers! So proud of you Tom ❤❤❤