EXPLAINING MY NON-BINARY DYSPHORIA | Story Time

[@ketzerapathetic1414]

Shifting dysphoria is hard to explain when you're gender fluid. Sometimes you can feel totally at home with your body and your presentation, and others you can be panicked by the existential dread of not having shape shifting powers to keep your body in sync with your gender.

[@_anonymous_creature_]

OMG I RELATE TO THIS SO MUCH (I'm genderflux-specifically girlflux) I'm afab, so when I'm fully female, I feel so AMAZING But then as soon as the agender hits, I freaking ***SCREAM*** and flee to the nearest oversized hoodie lolol

[@peachbubble8652]

@@_anonymous_creature_ SAME omg I’m demigirlflux and I’m completely fine appearing feminine but some days I feel agender/neutral. I use she/they pronouns. I actually just bought my first binder

[@froggycheckers]

@@peachbubble8652 Yooo congrats!! Make sure to bind safely!

[@arandomghostkid]

I have a gender fluid OC and they're a god- they can just snap their fingers and they're their preferred gender- lucky. (Not that I'm gender fluid myself)

[@mexicanwitahat9111]

Real:/

[@deoxiribo]

“I knew I was in there somewhere. I just couldn’t find myself.” I feel that so much!

[@deoxiribo]

I absolutely love microlabels. I love when people find words to describe their experiences. 💛 It’s something I love about the trans community and about the non-binary community in specific... the variety of gender experiences and feelings about gender. 💜

[@lynnsaga1397]

I’m thinking about doing a video on all the micro labels in the lgbtq community cause they don’t get enough love. And thank you so much. I was so happy when I found my label❤️

[@TheNitpickChick]

I related to a lot of this. Especially when it comes to my reflection not matching what I think I should look like. I’ve only recently come to terms with my nonbinary identity (I feel like the label Agender fits me best at the moment) but I’ve never really felt like a woman. I just kinda went along with being a girl/woman because that’s what I was assigned at birth, and I knew I didn’t feel like a man, so I just said okay, I guess I’m a girl??? Most of my dysphoria is with my chest. Like it started when I hit puberty before any of my friends, and every time I went to hang out with them they would comment on how big my chest was getting. They would say it in a complimentary tone, but eventually I had to blatantly ask them to stop because it made me so incredibly uncomfortable. I wasn’t proud of my growing chest. I wanted it to still be flat, but there was no going back, so I just had to deal with it. Over the years I pushed down those uncomfortable feelings, because there was nothing to be done about them. I began to view my chest as just a big nuisance that I couldn’t get rid of, so I just learned to live with it and tried to act like I felt confident about myself. But there was always the thought in the back of my head of, if only there were a medical reason to remove my tits. I feel like I would be so much more comfortable. In my mid twenties, I learned that nonbinary people exist, and that afab people can get top surgery and not have to identify as a man! It blew my mind! I was still in denial, but I felt such a longing to be able to be that way. To be able to step away from my acting role as a woman and embrace my inner gender neutrality. The more afab nonbinary people I saw getting top surgery, and their amazing results, the more I _wished_ I could be like them. I wouldn’t even allow myself to buy a binder because I was afraid to admit how much I disliked my chest, and also because I didn’t think a binder would work on a chest as big as mine, so what would be the point? It’s only really this year, at the age of 30, have I finally allowed myself to properly explore my gender and properly acknowledge how uncomfortable my body, but more specifically my chest, makes me feel. I bought my first official binder a couple weeks ago and I have never felt happier in my body! It doesn’t get me completely flat, but it minimizes my chest more then I thought possible! I’m finally feeling motivated to eat healthier and lose weight to get my body where I want it to be, to be able to wear the clothes I really want to wear, instead of just wallowing in self pity and settling for whatever clothes that will fit me. Once I get my weight to a healthier place, I plan to get either a severe breast reduction, or full on top surgery. I haven’t fully decided which yet, but it’s giving me hope! I’m finally able to feel like myself instead of trying to be what I think others expect me to be. It’s a little scary, but I’ve also never felt so free. 😊

[@AspenColony5647]

I recently came to a fairly definite conclusion that I am an asexual omniromantic demigirl and I want to thank you for helping me realize this and accept myself for it! LGBTQ+ KZbinrs have been my safe ground in my ever changing life and I want you to know you are loved and appreciated, not only be me, but by SO many others! Happy New Year and have a wonderful 2021 you wonderful person!

[@lynnsaga1397]

Happy New Year!! Thank you so much for this and I love seeing comments like this. LGBTQ KZbinrs are how I learned and started to grow into myself and I just hope I can be a small part of that for others

[@lynch702000]

I am sorry you are asexual, I guess you are who you are. Sex provides nerve stimulation unlike any other. I wish only the best for you. Dr. Bill

[@AnAroaceCrow]

@@lynch702000 (I know this was from a year ago, but I can't leave this unsaid, especially because I'm another asexual) It's not something to be sorry about. Some aces might still enjoy the act (action does not equal attraction), but others are indifferent or repulsed to it (repulsed here!). I am proud of my asexuality and I wouldn't change it for the world. Don't pity us aces. It may be physically stimulating, but the idea of doing it myself disgusts me. Asexuality is not a medical issue, it's a real orientation. I wish the best for you in understanding that not everyone likes sex or wants to have it.

[@46Dutch]

So you have a disorder?

[@xXMoonkiXtx]

Your discussion about your weight loss was very interesting to me, as my body was very “womanly” from the second puberty hit and my desperate attempt to both be thinner because it was the “good girl” thing to be whilst also trying very hard to not look like a woman because I didn’t feel like one was both clashing but intrinsically connected. Regardless I connected a lot to your discussion of both body and social dysphoria, my voice always “gives me away” in my mind. Wishing you peace, so glad I found you!

[@LordLegend2]

I love this video! As somebody that has came out to friends and family as non-binary this video is so uplifting and supporting. You couldn't have said it better, it is hard to by yourself around people. Once you find the group that you are able to be who you are it is freeing. I pray that everybody can find that group in their life.

[@46Dutch]

There is no such entity as non-binary-you are delusional.

[@supreme_leader_of_the_internet]

i woke up and saw this gem opened in front of me with literally zero context or back button, so hello future people

[@athazagoraphobia6924]

your story gives me hope. i figured out that i'm nonbinary in the past few months and it's been absolutely terrifying, but seeing someone living their life as their gender gives me hope that maybe one day i can do that too. i love your channel and am very glad that it exists!

[@lynnsaga1397]

Thank you so much. It was really scary in the beginning and I didn’t come out fully to everyone in my life until this year mostly because I wanted to start this channel and I knew if my mom found it she’d be confused. It can be hard sometimes but it’s gotten soooo much better. I’m really glad you enjoy the channel ❤️

[@helenalovelock1030]

Hi can i ask why you felt terrified? I’d like to understand as I’m Cis and want to learn what my 21 year old has been going through since she was young as she said she may be non-binary ❤️❤️

[@athazagoraphobia6924]

@@helenalovelock1030 no problem. i grew up in a decently transphobic environment and thus was unlearning everything i'd been taught and that's scary. change is scary and that's really what was terrifying to me. i wasn't who i thought i was. i've been doing great since i wrote the original comment and am generally less scared about the whole ordeal.

[@helenalovelock1030]

@@athazagoraphobia6924 I’m so happy for you❤️. We get one life and we have to do what we can to be happy.

[@LyralioRC]

I've been thinking about whether I fall into the non-binary spectrum or not. The thing is, I feel comfortable as a girl, but not as a woman. Which is a little, erm, weird, since I'm quickly approaching the age of 33. I like feminine historical clothing, dresses and all, but also the idea that someone doesn't have to be a woman to wear them. I like having super long hair but not bewbs (I'm fine with not having a peen, in fact I'm glad I don't). I played as much with dolls as I did with action figures as a kid. I was fascinated with androgyny since my teenage years. I look at women in modern movies (why hello, Hallmark Christmas movies, didn't see you standing there) and feel uneasy at the thought that that's how society thinks I should be. I dunno... I'm just confused as whack.

[@peyton9566]

Oddly specific, and 100% relatable, down to the historical dresses and action figures. Are you sure you're not me?

[@theanonymous.5940]

Same except I want a peen but i'm not sure if I want give up my vag for it.

[@theanonymous.5940]

have you looked into the label demigirl?

[@cryocriminal_1019]

I support you. But it doesn't make sense to change ur gender and how u identify simply bc of how u dress, act, it's not that serious.

[@vicky8779]

hey, i just discovered your channel through the youtube recommendations and i wanted to thank you because the couple of videos I’ve seen really made me think and i feel like they pointed me in a direction where i maybe will be able to figure out (in the future) what it is that i am struggling with to realize or to figure out for quite a while now. i am struggling for a really long time now because something about me makes me feel really off and bad about myself and the whole sexual/romantic-attraction thing and i still don’t really know what it is exactly. but yeah i think your videos will help me figure it out and actually invest time in thinking about it because just thinking about the things i’m struggling with makes me really uncomfortable and creates a feeling of uneasiness that makes it really hard for me to get into this topic. so thank you for starting your channel!!

[@zethcrownett2946]

Oh my gosh, I relate to this so much, thank you. I also grew up lds, and was really upset about being forced to wear a dress, and forced into activities that pressure femininity, and I distinctly remember when they were doing a make up thing, complaining about it to one of the male leaders and he didnt seem to believe me when I said I could feel the difference of the weight on my skin and nails. I also hid my body in baggy clothes. And would occasionally look in the mirror and wonder what I'd look like without a chest or if I was a boy. I just completely disconnected from my body. I dont like people being attracted to me. I'm distanced enough that I honestly dont know how I feel about gender. And im.. working on exploring where I am and who I am.. thank you.

[@lynnsaga1397]

I remember when the boys would come back from scout camp around the same time we’d get back from girls camp and I’d always be jealous af because they’d talk about actually camping and doing cool stuff and I’d just spent the week in an ac cabin doing crafts lol

[@zethcrownett2946]

@@lynnsaga1397 100% I was jealous every time. My older brother who was in scouts, I frequently asked why I couldnt just also do scouts? Also, helping move chairs or helping people move, being told I should let the guys do it instead. Or being questioned about if I could actually physically handle something when they dont mind my brother over stretching himself and throwing out his back from it when I'm well aware of my capabilities.

[@SippenTeaa]

Thank you for sharing your story! My dysphoria is really fluid in terms of intensity and non-binary to binary. I question my gender a lot due to my complicated dysphoria and lack of body dysphoria. I really like the thread you showed at the beginning, it lifted some stress off me.

[@pranjaliagrawal8819]

I really appreciate you telling your story. You have no idea how relieved I am. I have felt exactly the way you used to feel. As far as I can remember, I wanted to feel like I belonged to myself but couldn’t. I wanted to find my true identity but it was (and still is) so, so hard. Nobody around me had this ‘problem’ and so I thought that I was lacking in some way. It’s been quite a journey! Lots of love to you❤️ 😊

[@deoxiribo]

Excited for this video! And OMG non-binary dysphoria is SO REAL.

[@UczuciaTM]

See, I have more social dysphoria. Like, being called she and he make me want to scream. Being called a girl makes me want to scream, but I’m okay with certain feminine words such as “girlfriend,” and I’m also okay with my feminine body (in fact I want to be more femme, body wise), but, right now specifically, I want to dress more androgynous and have short hair. I think my dysphoria might be the kind that shifts. Edit: I think I’m nonbinary, agenderflux/libragender (libragender fits a bit more but it’s far less common than agender so)

[@best_of_ant]

Other than just time traveling, as someone who now thinks they identify as non-binary as well, I really wanna learn from this video and appreciate oneself for who they are 😄. See you in the future !

[@theunicornkitty2516]

Something that was always weird for me I was AFAB growing up is that the girls always asked me if I was part boy because of my aggressive personality and non-stereotypical female personality traits. It never bothered me, I just thought they were stupid. I always did like to try to be like a boy instead of a girl some days cus it felt fun. I legit had a guy say I was more of a man than some men he knew. No idea how I feel about that still. Listening to these stories on KZbin or reading about them always makes think about this.

[@joeyross4357]

I was very boyish myself growing up and even had boy phases where I'd become a boy for monthes at a time and never knew it was because I'm nonbinary by gender idnentity.You sound a lot like me and I'm a nonconforming genderfluid.

[@GranderMako]

I feel this so hard. I am non binary and no one in my life supports that or uses my correct pronouns. I have never felt more alone than I do now

[@yadongon]

crying right now aaa like, a lot of the stuff you said about your dysphoria fit me to a tee and the sentiment that while others may perceive me as a women doesn't make me one and the looking into a mirror you knew you were there, you just couldn't find it yet or something just- aaa it's reassuring that im not making this up, or im crazy, or that i want attention this is who i am it's such a basic part of me that you'd think i wouldn't be in agony every now and then questioning myself or thinking im being ridiculous about my chest dysphoria so thank you for making this vid, it's suuuuper reassuring for me

[@46Dutch]

That is because you are a woman and you should be glad of that.

[@RhoadesLessTraveled]

I literally about died when you mentioned skorts because that's exactly what happened to me too. I'm almost 24 and just figuring out that I'm non-binary. So hearing so many things that just remind me of what I went through feels so validating. I had it so drilled into my head that I had to be this super girly person society viewed me as that even when learning about the trans community, I was so blind to identifying with any of it. Looking back now I can see why I was so passionate about LGBTQ+ rights in middle school. Haha.

[@insertname9080]

Thanks for sharing this video! I'm still in the process of questioning my own gender and facing the many levels of denial I have and your experiences describe a lot of what I feel as well! I'm looking forward to the day where I don't doubt my experiences and accept who I am.

[@30000beesinatrenchcoat]

this

[@jasminaj3682]

Almost at 1,000! Smashing this KZbin game!

[@lynnsaga1397]

I’m trying 😅😅

[@RosheenQuynh]

I came out as librafeminine at the beginning of June but about a week ago or so, I remember catching a glimpse of myself in a possible sleep-deprived, dissociative state and thinking "Whoa! I feel more feminine right now!" It made me wonder if that "partially connected to femininity" was not as cut and dry as I thought. Now I wonder if I am femflux where I might fluctuate from 0% femininity to 75% femininity.

[@nesser52]

I've came from a scary cishet and, for some reason, agressive lesbians, stuff, pls take me back into enby aroace bubble 😕

[@lilly6714]

1080 subs congratulations, I'm new. Hi. I found you on your Ace videos. Love this.

[@lynnsaga1397]

Thank you so much!! And welcome☺️ I’m so happy so many people are liking the ace stuff on my channel

[@lilly6714]

@@lynnsaga1397 I'm cis gender so I can't really connect to your struggles here but I truly admire your strength in talking about it. I can connect to your Ace content really well, that's why I'm trying to do my part on the topics I don't quite understand to support you. I love your reaction videos cause you actually talk about each clip. Also your video quality is amazing I can't believe you only started like 3-4 months ago on youtube. I'm currently making my way through all your videos but I really wanted to say hi.

[@mep6302]

I have the opposite experience as a non binary AMAB person. I don't know why people, especially my parents wanted me to be so masculine. And sometimes I wondered why I wasn't born a girl. I hated my penis and wanted to get rid of it. When I started puberty I hated eractions and becoming too hairy. I hated my face and body. But I didn't feel I was a girl anymore. I was becoming a man how people told me when I was a kid and it was scary. I never felt connected with any kind of manhood and I didn't want to be a woman. I didn't know how to explain it to people because they think if you don't want to be your gender you want to be the opposite. I even wondered why I had to interact with men one way and women another way. Why I couldn't be the same person with men and with women. Now I shave almost everything and I can wear less traditional masculine clothes. I feel like myself now and I'm happier and my dysphoria is almost 100% gone :)

[@isaacw1689]

This is really interesting and informative, your videos on asexuality and aromanticism were super relatable, made me relive some really weird moments from high school, but now I really understand the difference between gender-fluid and cassgender. I am cassgender and I don't experience dysphoria so much as I just don't feel a strong connection to being either (or neither) binary gender. I go by he/him because of my anatomy and it is just convenient, I always wondered what it would be like to be a girl and to switch back and forth, but I never wanted to specifically be or not be one or both genders. In reference to your Ace and Aro videos, I wound up married to my best friend because I was a mormon and felt like I was "supposed" to be married and feel certain ways, and it was a sin not to do so. I love your videos that I have seen thus far, and with everything I have learned in the past year it helps to have someone with a similar upbringing talk about some of the things that I always thought were just a part of me being "kinda weird."

[@lynnsaga1397]

Thanks you so much! I really want to do more videos on growing up Mormon because there’s just so much I could say. I always felt super left out when the boys would do stuff and I was just doing things that would “make me a better wife for my future husband”. I’m so happy you enjoy my videos☺️

[@behindzerosp]

I felt off for long timeand the more I related to being non-binary the stronger dysphoria became ,because I started to see what is making me feel so disconnected and so ''just exsisting in my body but not actually] I had about year terrible physical dysphoria but then it went drastically down but in place of it my intrussive and internalised trans/enby phobic thoughts and almost constant feeling of empthy/depressed took place. I just started to feel the same things but in different way. I had depression from yong agae so I knew about it but it never had that exact form till my so called body dysphoria went down . Also about the weiht ,I was chubby till year7and when I gott into normal shape for my hight and body type I could see that it was healthy weight and good figure but it still felt fat/off/too curvy,Later I had periods of almost spiralling down into ED because I wanted to make my butt the thing that made me look the most like woman after my chest dissapear.I coudn`t understand why woman want big butt and even have breast implants when I was there with bellow average size chest and felt it was too big /unnecessary. Genetically it was impossible for me to be that skinny girl that could pass for a tenn boy, knew that but still had periods where I coudn`t stop obssessng with food and weight. The mirror thing is so spot on not always but most of the time I see me but can`t feel the person in the mirror as myslef? I love to shower and at the begining of my pick pshysical dysphoria I had tolook up,now I think I dissociate so hard like I see myself and don`t at the same time also sometimes it is ok as long asI don`t ponder over it. I just got used to feel tha weird meh/just exsisting thing. I am terrified that someone will come and verify that I am cis because despite still fighting many internalised thoughts that stop me from finding the right name and pronounce and feeling like imposter when saying I am non-binary it is still so scary to imagine all my life as woman . Currently I can`t see any future but the one of woman is the one I am most scared to see

[@behindzerosp]

Update today I don't feel anything and Idk what to do

[@30000beesinatrenchcoat]

I think the only reason I don't have more body dysphoria is that my mental dysphoria makes me extremely apathetic towards pretty much everything, and I've noticed it has pretty significantly decreased my enjoyment of life as a whole because I can't come out to anyone close to me out of fear for what they'd say, but I know if I do come out there will be a big weight lifted off of my shoulders. I don't know what to think or do right now an it's stressing me out. I also resonate with your last few sentences as I don't know if my thoughts about my gender identity are being true to myself or just something to help me feel more "unique" and "different".

[@cockycookie1]

This is exactly what I was looking for! I want to understand nonbinary identity to be a better ally (as a transman) and this definitely helped.

[@NatureLover-pj2qe]

Thanks for this. I’m non-binary and I can relate to a lot of what was said here although my body dysphoria was a little bit less intense.

[@niamh7047]

Felt the need to comment to say thank you for sharing this and for your vulnerability

[@kelsey6943]

I’m so glad I found this! Like this is really amazing and exactly what I needed to hear

[@lynch702000]

Wow, what a great video. It must been hard to make. I'm a str8 dad of an mtf, pan daughter, and yes an uncle of an ftm. I have seen your pain first hand. I personally hate the term "dysphoria", I prefer to think of everyone as "unique", which is a good thing. Don't get on yourself for not being uniform, we are who we are. My mom, rip, used to say I marched to the tune of a different drummer. I'm a str8 dad, but would have been honored to have you as my kid. Best wishes for you. Dr. Bill

[@noctuidae2872]

I recently found your channel. I'd just like to say that I like your content and thank you for making this.

[@lynnsaga1397]

Thank you so much!!

[@McMerlin11]

I don’t know why but when Lynn talked about how they still get dysphoria when laughing too high or using their customer service voice…I feel that. My customer service voice, or just the voice that comes out when I’m nervous, is so high and it makes me so mad at myself. I really do want a deep voice…I have ever since I was little.

[@meadowrae1491]

I'm bawling. I had the eating disorder. I got upset being separated from guy friends in groups. I got upset when my friends were attracted to me. I didn't know I was non-binary until I was 30. I had a surgery to remove extra skin from my chest from weight loss/child birth. In my head I thought they would be smaller, they weren't. That triggered the most intense body dysphoria I've ever had. I'm 33 now and considering going on T, but I'm terrified of getting another surgery, even though that's kind of what I want now.

[@yourfavoritemonday3298]

This is literally amazing I don't know any other non binary people so I don't know if my experience is normal if other people go through it but I can really relate to this ♥️

[@ajcindercraft3311]

Just because trans and enby people are different from the cis norm of society doesn't mean they have to suffer. They're still people, they're just as valid, they deserve happiness in whatever way it finds them.

[@rainbowgirl3225]

Thank you for sharing this. I had a similar experience growing up and this was extremely validating.

[@fay2244]

Congrats on reaching your goal of a 1,000 subs and Happy Early Birthday!

[@lidu6363]

This was very enlightening. Thank you for sharing your story. I don't know who these people denying the existence of non-binary gender disphoria are, but I hope they find this and learn from it.

[@brycekrispi3s540]

Thank you so, so much for taking the time to make these kinds of videos. They've helped me so much these past few weeks.

[@julesma]

Thank you so much for this, Lynn! We're proud of you too

[@tudormiller8898]

Love this video. I hope your Christmas was amazing. I look forward to watching more content on your channel in 2021. Happy 2021!

[@lynnsaga1397]

Thank you so much!! Happy 2021😊

[@xliploverx]

I know this is an old video but thank you so much for making this video. I’m questioning myself and this has been very helpful. I truly believe I fall somewhere on the NB spectrum but I’m so afraid to tell anyone especially since I’m afab and married to a cis/het man. I’ve always considered myself bisexual, even tho I think pan would closer describe how I feel, but that wasn’t really a term back when I learned it about myself so I still just call myself bi and I’m out to my whole friend group and my husband’s family as bi. I had “genderqueer” explained to me by a NB person a really long time ago and it made so much sense to me even then so I’ve always kinda identified with that. I just don’t even know how to go about bringing this up with my husband.

[@KevinMurphy01]

Wow Lynn!! So proud of you for doing this!!!!

[@homicidalsheep1537]

Dysphoria is weird for me because my brain is broken and can’t really see/notice details such hips, facial structure, most of the stereotypical gendered biological stuff. I don’t have dysphoria around those things because I can’t tell the difference, and it makes me feel like my dysphoria isn’t “bad” enough

[@elizabethdavis8594]

I feel it's great that you can see yourself how you feel you should be. That's the most important person you are.

[@joeyross4357]

I thought it was strange how I reacted to starting to get boobs when I first started because I right away began pulling my shirts away from my chest and also hunching over to hide that mess.I did searches for flat chest subliminals here to help deal with it.I'm currently using some and a desired body one to make my body shaped more like a boy's while still maintaining my birth gender' for reproducing.

[@thesnekshed4380]

Right I need that shirt where is it from

[@MikkiPike]

I really loved it! We do exist!!! 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳

[@BeccainHawaii]

My body is s female, but that is not who I am, I am just me. I don't know if what you are saying is the same as how I feel. I never had gender dysphoria, but maybe not until having my first daughter did I feel myself as a woman, but even then my body is just the vessel that holds me, but it is not who I am. To explain further as a teen I didn't feel comfortable with others seeing my body and so wore an oversized jacket all the time, I felt safe and hidden in that jacket. I would say I have no "gender identity," but my physical gender is female and so I never felt misgendered when people referred to me as such.

[@coachkira]

I love this video, your experiences are so important 💜

[@nancydrewnerd]

I could relate to so much of what you talked about. Awesome video can't wait to see more content!

[@lynnsaga1397]

Thank you!!!

[@thebrightestrainbowever3841]

I am happy for you. What a journey💜🙌🏻. Yes we live in such a limiting society the sad thing is as A society we create these limitations and restrictions that only hurt our lgbtq 🏳️‍🌈 community. We have so much strength and resilience in our community

[@starsinleaves3671]

Thank you for this video! I'm cis and I feel that I finally understand (at least partially ^^") what it means to be enby and to experience dysphoria related to it. Take care :3

[@30000beesinatrenchcoat]

I'm enby and I don't know what enby dysphoria feels like, more specifically my dysphoria anyway

[@_anonymous_creature_]

I'm screaming lol As soon as I clicked the video, my gender immediately shifted to demigirl and now I feel AAAA Genderflux go BRRR

[@bobatea6781]

I realized I was under the non-binary umbrella as either gender fluid or agender in December. :) I had gender confusion all through k-12 but the longing died after high-school. I was fine being female until my mid-twenties and this feeling came back in November. I think I thought I was just female because I wasn't informed well on what it meant to be non-binary. I had this one-dimensional androgynous view of it before. As I am now I keep having a longing to have a biologically male body. If I could have a choice, I would have been born in one, but I don't want to undergo medical altercations. I also enjoy identifying as female and occasionally enjoy dresses/makeup. I'm torn, so I settled on non-binary as a term to simplify my gender fluid/agender identity. I'm not comfortable with they/them. I'm using she/her out in society, but I like he/him the best.

[@little_blue_dragon661]

You mean it's not normal to look at a mirror and not identify with your reflection?

[@thepersonofrainbows2959]

hi love that you do this!!!🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🔴🟣🔵

[@lynnsaga1397]

Thank you so much!! I was super nervous about it but I’m so happy I did it

[@anelaboratedream]

Thank you so much for this video. I relate to what you talked about so, so much.

[@idk-og6iw]

i can relate :> ♡ everyTime i feel not good i can watch your vids and feel good again

[@brynl-k4118]

You are so brave for this. Thank you. Just what I needed. Its funny, feeling sometimes feeling invalidated from cis community and the trans community...like...when are you transitioning, when are you doing this and that...or...of course you are female or male...or whatever. Sigh. This quote was nice and refreshing.

[@kpenkava264]

Thank you so much. It is so helpful to hear your experience. I can relate so much thank you.

[@DeusExMachinae01]

thank you!! best video i found about the topic! so relatable!

[@amygriffith8224]

Im non-binary but i have fluctuating dysphoria.

[@SaviourInDistress]

I actually quit doing sports when they made skorts the madatory uniform. I just despise the feeling i get when im wearing anything like a skirt or dress. I just feel so wrong and then being forced to wear that for sport hurt so much. If id had more confidence in myself i might have asked if i could just wear shorts but i didnt. Cowardly little kid who didnt want to explain how wrong they felt wearing skirts/skorts because i guess even then i realised it wasnt quite normal. 😅 not that cis woman cant hate wearing skirts though. Totally valid.

[@richardarmstrong5668]

Do you have to have gender dysphoria to be nonbinary or transgender?

[@susanacastroegas6375]

Ibgained Wright. While I gained wayvnore than I was comfortable and believe noon will like me as fat woman... still I can see that I didn't wanna be super thin as other girls. I likes dmchuby. Maybe loose some but couldn't loose Wright because it feel like was accepting the idea that the end expectations was curva and hate that idea. Girls curva never want to be orejeras chuby, androgynous.i guess now I'm accepted nonbinary myself I can loose some Wright but probablystill qant some not too thin shape to not pass as woman. I haven't realize this before eu say it. Actually during the video o was thinking I didn't have that disphoria and felt it wasn't the same but because I t was I didn't have a Girl body, and while also wasn't happend with my body, I never wanted the girl body... partially was ok not to look girls even people think it wa sonly depression. And from time to time I was ok look femalely hence fluidgwnder maybe... but almost never and prefer neutral. Androgynous. Or always have. Lately I'm exploring masc look, I used to liked but feared to be confuse with a boy I knew o was not. Now feel more confident.aint a boy but can look as one or look however I want and not being either female nor male

[@kookyblossem1793]

yea i totally dont have dyshoria. and i also totally didnt make my mom take me home to change bc i thought i could wear a dress but i couldnt edit: just so you know the first sentace was sarcastic

[@thedangerousivy]

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

[@michaelmcentyre919]

wow im just chilling in here in the comments lol

[@julietteSoul]

TY

[@ElephantsRock943]

OKAY WHATTTT I'M HERE WATCHING ALL THESE NB VIDEOS BECAUSE I'M QUESTIONING MY GENDER BECAUSE RELIEF SOCIETY (et al.) MAKES ME WANT TO CRY. I personally love the gospel, but not such a fan of all the gendered everything.

[@ElephantsRock943]

Glad to have found someone else who understands that community and how binary it is and how frustrating that is.

[@charliepetitdemange4404]

Thank you so mucn ✨❤️

[@newworldlove7031]

Everyday I feel at war with my body. GD is god alful. I feel I don't fit into the uber masculine gay man's world as I never feel masculine enough and I dont identify as 100% gay or male. I don't feel I fit in any where!! I guess I'm on the non binary ace spectrum. Great video, thank you.

[@korok_05]

this was so inspiring

[@confusedxcheetos]

okay but like off topic you would look good in a beanie haha

[@peachydoodles]

aw sheesh, im so glad your threw that!

[@diablominero]

You look really nonbinary. My visual system is refusing to even try to figure out whether you're masculine or feminine.

[@craigmuzz8670]

wtf i thought i had mental disorder lmfao

[@sarahl9209]

You left one cult for another.

[@andreyromashchenko8967]

If I, let's say, expressed my dysphoria with human kind and asked others not to refer to me as a human, you would see that I stereotyped every human, made a shameful mockery of everyone in my mind, tried to distance myself from the image of human race AND the realization of being a human would bring up much resentment in me. Long story short, a person like that is called *misanthrope.* In your case it's a *misogynist.* Plus, nobody feels a gender. It's a term, not a state of mind. You can enjoy your gender role, by being pretentious and feeling demonstrative. If you don't want to play a gender role, a gender doesn't disappear with it. A gender is not tied to a gender role. How in the world did you end up thinking that people feel their genders????? This is mind blowing.

[@Syaplemachine]

To any cis AFAB people here... How do you know that you're a woman?

[@sallyjrwjrw6766]

I was born with a vagina

[@deborahburrage6957]

Our kids dont need to see stuff like this