Finale of the Onion Trilogy (I read onision's THIRD book)

[@catie5403]

Stones to Abbigale: Greg This is Why I Hate You: Greg Reapers Creek: Greg with a propeller hat

[@smileymctrashbag]

CATIE, HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME? You've fucking killed me.

[@moew3154]

it’s more like reapers creek: greg and also greg

[@smileymctrashbag]

@@moew3154 But with propeller hats

[@buckwetgwenismyreligion1619]

@@moew3154 They BOTH have propeller hats

[@mariuchiha4664]

Now I’m just picturing Onision wearing a black wig with thick black eyeliner and a rainbow propeller hat.

[@mus-dos4763]

"it's okay to kill child predators!" -a child predator in a book written by a child predator

[@shippyboio]

Maybe Greggy's suicidal lmao

[@katara_grayson]

It takes one to write one

[@donnieburnett4622]

Get Chris Hansen on the phone.

[@mina-simp]

Well yeah, gotta get rid of the competition

[@androidinblack5291]

This is like the Florida Man meme where he rapes the rapist, except it’s a child predator’s self insert killing a child predator’s child predator father in a book written by a child predator.

[@ratvoiid]

"oh god he's noticed a female" - the entire onision saga

[@kentremendous5112]

literally read this right as Aeon said it lmao

[@prettyredfox8631]

@@kentremendous5112 holy cow me too

[@paranormeow]

this is off topic but I clicked on ur channel and holy crap ur art is so cute and good???

[@jackalxpe]

i love rewatching this because my brain immediately blocks out the memory of the plot so it's always like watching for the first time and i get to crylaugh all over again

[@spiltmilk0204]

sameee lmao this is my favorite video to revisit just because the plot is so wild i can never remember exactly what happens. its like restating a save file in Pokemon

[@anaionescu8913]

I rewatch this at least once a week, either to do my makeup, or to clean the house. Like the headache I get from the story kinda blocks out the headache I get from inhaling dust and cleaning supplies fumes.

[@falconinthedive]

I just started this after watching the last and have already forgot the plot of the 2nd.

[@meowspark9]

SAME

[@greciabarraza4986]

I always say how there’s so many movies I wish I could watch again for the first time because of the plot twist, this is like a loophole to that. My brain deletes so many of the details that rewatching it is really like a first impression of his book and I laugh every single time.

[@lilyelgart9893]

“this book went from ‘this is bad’ to ‘i’m having a stroke’ immediately”

[@juanpablorobayo9891]

imMEDIATELY

[@lilyelgart9893]

this comment blew up wow i’m so proud tia notice me

[@tumblefawns]

As a wise tumblr user once said, “11 year olds have the self preservation of someone who met God and wasn’t impressed”

[@madison5645]

And it all goes to shit when they turn 12.

[@no-man_baugh]

Yet another wise saying I saw from Krimsonrogue's premire of this book "I can't believe he killed SKY DADDY!"

[@RB-mb6pm]

It's okay you can just say Edward Elric

[@richardnoggin1526]

I'm 14 and this is deep

[@scope402]

😂😂😂

[@jasminerayne6642]

the fact she said ,“we would hit on my sister” instead of “he” didn’t phase me says a lot about onision’s previous books

[@unlikealiens803]

Exactly!!!!

[@michaelkeller5555]

EXACTLY what I thought. I was surprised when she corrected it, I didn't fucking blink at the original.

[@urgae9125]

@@michaelkeller5555 she didn’t either LMAO Besides, the man has admitted he’s kissed his cousin, there’s nothing he wouldn’t do to his family if he could control them like he does his partner and kids. I really fear for his kids’ safety.

[@Deadspooky-Gore]

It would make sense as to why he's so irrationally angry at his sister just existing and being a good person.

[@gokuxsephiroth4505]

You know, Onision clearly has a firm stance that pedophilia is bad. But like... only when ugly men do it. When hot girls do it, it's fine.

[@SeventhSeraphOfficerRevolver]

Nope, he's a pedophile.

[@commandercorl1544]

Huh, you wouldn't think he'd condemn himself like that.

[@gokuxsephiroth4505]

@@commandercorl1544 I know, right? If anything, he should be preaching the opposite

[@commandercorl1544]

@@gokuxsephiroth4505 Exactly. Wacky double-standards, amiright?

[@tiggyvolts9076]

@margaretgibbs6673Tbf that's typical narcissist behaviour so you're right lol

[@pastelchemist2479]

He heard a non-audible noise. HE HEARD A *NON AUDIBLE* NOISE

[@namkedi]

OH IM SURE GREGORY THE GOD ALSO: SAW THE UNSEEABLE COLORS TASTED THE NO TASTE FOOD WROTE THE WORST BOOK EVER FELT THE UNFEEABLE WIND

[@namkedi]

@Leviathanoof that's a good burn

[@wafflejam9015]

oh I was kinda imagining it like angel radio from supernatural where our senses are too dull to hear it

[@hekaterinedragon8776]

How the hell do you hear a non audible sound? It's non audible for a reason!

[@koreyb1671]

He’s too Chad for conventional physics

[@04whim]

Onion: "This is me, as I am, unfiltered, raw." Book Greg: 11. Yeah that checks out surprisingly well.

[@couragekarnga8735]

Hey, man, I don't know any eleven-year-olds who think like this.

[@themyofmy]

@@couragekarnga8735 im a 11 y/o that looks at nsfw of bfdi and swears every three seconds at school, and im pretty sure im a better human being than greg

[@04whim]

@@couragekarnga8735 Well some must. We know Greg can only be sexually attracted to people who don't challenge his world view in any way.

[@Mordewolt]

@@themyofmy One part of me thinks that i gotta report this comment for what will happen if it stays up, but another part of me thinks that it would be unfair to rob you of the learning experience it will provide, that will make you understand why exactly you can't just go around saying those things on the internet.

[@PalitoSelvatico]

@@couragekarnga8735 not to defend grog but when I was eleven I had maybe worse ideas

[@MochiiBunniie]

“Oh God, he’s noticed a female.” Disconnect his internet.

[@shinymetagross1666]

Is this the plot of SCP: Containment Breach 2?

[@TheBonkleFox]

Get away from the internet, I'm cuttin' it down!

[@disappointingperson9162]

@@sugarvomitt4831 from any educational institution

[@KrazyKitty]

My god, the book I wrote when I was 7 about a minecraft cat having to save his owners after the mountain they lived on having an avalanche so their was a huge cliff and having to cross half the world to find the one person who can talk to cats was better than this.

[@rivahoukes1554]

That still sounds like a great book to read high

[@gerbillama03]

I want to read that book

[@thequeenofcringe1585]

I’d read that.

[@elafimilo8199]

D'aww

[@IndelibleSin317]

Oh, it sounds cute and not mind scarring.

[@trombonemain]

That whole passage where he calls his stepdad “papa” and talks about his mustache reads like some sort of gay porn setup.

[@balt3536]

Evan Search What are you doing stepdad

[@Therebesquare]

Oh papa I’ve been a really ReALlY bAd BoY. Papa: I gotta... punish you... son.

[@ConcreteMars]

@@Therebesquare Okay :/

[@themyofmy]

@@Therebesquare why does this sound like a roleplay from wattpad

[@callingthevoid]

@@Therebesquare well that's *_bUrNeD_* into my mind...

[@thespacebat]

The fact that when you misread "he would hit on my sister" and I didn't even flinch because it was from Onision is pretty telling.

[@ehlins]

Oh my god i didnt question it either i just-

[@Niftyman3]

Right!?!

It stuck out to me but in more of a “huh” way than “wait, what?”

[@squamman631]

Time stamp?

[@ArtisteRel]

Hahaha, I didn't even realize it was misread even long after she corrected hereself. I thought she personally tried to make it sound less incestual. lol

[@lochlanpage4327]

"She's unconscious, because who isn't in this book" Iconic.

[@Xehanort10]

Unconscious is how Greg prefers his women.

[@pecklespeckle1]

@@Xehanort10 Greg's type is unconscious children

[@evan-bunch-of-numbers]

@@Xehanort10 unconscious, and at least 3 years younger than the age of consent in the state she lives in

[@no.8637]

@nue also the children are also almost as drugged out of their minds as Greg as he wrote this "book"

[@easternlights3155]

Fun fact: even in the Czech Republic, one of the most alcoholic countries in the world, where children are regularly offered to sip the foam off their parents' beer, nobody would ever mock an 11 year old for refusing to drink alcohol.

[@baramenhardova3583]

As a fellow Czech, I could see giving an 11yo who really wants to be one of the grown ups a taste of something stronger, mostly to laugh when they spit it out, because alcohol tastes fucking gross unless you've already burned out all your tastebuds.

[@zebraneighbor6383]

I used to date a girl whose mother mocked her for not drinking when she was 18, but that's older than 11.

[@Pr1nceofdarkness]

Yeah in the U.K. where children can technically drink in their own home from age 5 no one would mock an 11 year old for not wanting to drink whisky maybe at a push joke about them not wanting to try the foam or joke about a 14 not wanting VK or disgustingly cheap cider but not mock.

[@TheGloriousLobsterEmperor]

Based Czechs.

[@5PctJuice]

I know you're making a based point but it's absolutely hilarious to me that your argument is basically "Even Czechia isn't that fucked up."

[@ananaspryde5687]

"this book is based on my life" Proceeds to present himself as an all knowing, godly entity that is ok with pedophilia.

[@ananaspryde5687]

@Angie Gomez well its most defintly how onionboy sees himself. Its like the fever dream of a 14 year old big brain edgelord

[@lkcullen1918]

don't forget the superiority complex and creepy pregnancy fetishism (but that's kinda present in all his books)

[@SuperMisteryMan01]

AND THEN ALIENS 👽

[@kdags2001]

"hello is this 911, what's your emergency? oh, it's the onion man again? fuck. teya is on her way"

[@ThePastaMiner]

it's pretty accurate i'd say

[@HazardousClim]

For everyone saying, "If these can get published ..." just remember: these are all self-published. There was no agent, editor, publishing house, book tours, advances. Literally no one in their right mind would publish these, especially as they are. That brings me comfort

[@storageheater]

Publishing gets this thick, mucussy veneer of purity because it's about books and books are by spiritually gifted creators for smart people, but it really isn't that comforting - half of those aspects are just pleasantly acceptable variants of advertising and you can still buy fancy Published books by all kinds of shitty people that will make some explicitly racist white dudes a lot of money on the other hand if you self publish you basically have to settle for making jeff bezos more money, but you've got bills to pay

[@Caldella]

I know Onion Boy never would agree to it, but I would love to see this book given to a proper editor ... just to see how long it takes for the edits to devolve into "WHAT?!" over and over.

[@naomikathleen3616]

@@Caldella I believe one of his fans, it could’ve been a patron but I can’t be sure, offered to edit it. I remember seeing a video someone made where Greg flipped out on this fan for offering to edit his book and said his writing was “perfect the way it was.” They didn’t even ask him to pay, either.

[@Caldella]

@@naomikathleen3616 I'm 100% not surprised at all.

[@JamesSchulte]

Any publishers and editors he'd try to go too/hire would burn his books with holy fire and call the cops on him

[@castaway2850]

this book reads like greg had seen the “shaggy using .5% of his power” memes and decided he wanted to be like that

[@CT-se8vn]

anti orbs this book reads like a bad shaggy/invader zim fanfic

[@atlasatlastt]

CT R/yes

[@mypenisisincrediblysmallbu243]

Greg can never ever begin to compare to Shaggy

[@motherofdogs7980]

Don't insult Shaggy.

[@murciadoxial8056]

I am 100% certain that tara gilesbie is greg's ghost writer

[@lazarus9581]

In my opinion, the *worst* thing about this book, is that ‘Phillip’ is based off an actual person with the same name, someone who Greg got into a fight with when he was in 2nd grade (according to Greg himself), the part that makes it even worse? Greg claimed Phillip died two years after the fight, when he was *9*. So the best-case scenario is another lie to add on, and at worst, mocking of an actual dead child’s death.

[@woodlefoof2]

In my opinion, the worst part The detail he had during the scene between an 11 and 14 year old means he typed it with one hand

[@VegetaSoup]

Meanwhile he has the audacity to come after Strange for saying the friend in stones to Abigail was annoying. Because apparently that friend “died.” He’s a hypocrite

[@cottontail5514]

11 year old Greg is flirting with the 15 year old girl becuase that's who 30 year old Greg would flirt with

[@derptank3308]

*OOF* Das prolly true

[@bug8992]

Well he did rate teenagers bodies..

[@rennyh8627]

@@bug8992 he literally groomed like 3 whole human beings hes a monster.

[@moonchan561]

@@rennyh8627 I think he groomed more than 3 but the point is, he is an actual monster, I agree with you

[@stephaniegutierrez4906]

Anna-00P

[@Passports-pls]

“Am I gonna read any of Onision’s other books? Hell no,” - StrangeÆons, Nov 2018

[@rowlettboy5748]

She also did say if she made enough money from the first video she would read the other books

[@rubyfukr8215]

Whack

[@blackknightjack3850]

To think she said this after reading the best of Onion's books.

[@1xoACEox1]

"Hell no" *videos gets 3 million views* "Hell yes!"

[@jimshotfirst4887]

"My name is Gregory Darkness Dementia Raven Way" Jesus, put a warning or something next time, I choked on my water lmao

[@chloescreations8410]

Fucking hell, that’s on par with “Obsidian Blackbird McNight” Hats off to you if you get the ref, if not, it’s “Mighty Boosh” where the character, Vince Noir, pretends to be goth to impress two goth girls and instead accidentally releases the most evil demon known to the MBEU (Mighty Boosh Extended Universe) who takes the form of a little, unassuming old lady, and he defeats her with hairspray and “nana nana go away, come again another day”

[@saulesalejos4483]

Cool. My name is Sir Edges-A-Lot. Nice to meed my fellow edgy.

[@selkiefluff]

"These are my children, God and Karen" Bruh that was literally an entire season of Supernatural...

[@tovareardon4541]

Yeah supernatural was pretty bad too

[@erinw.9256]

@@tovareardon4541 I take offense.

[@TorrentialStardust]

@@erinw.9256 even after season 15?

[@erinw.9256]

@@TorrentialStardust Yes. It's my comfort show. I wouldn't have survived high school without Supernatural.

[@Gafafsg]

@@erinw.9256 I mean I hate everything I enjoy and I’m fine 🤷‍♂️

[@antisocialextrovert7137]

“inappropriate to an illegal extent” are the words of a groomer. and someone that pushes boundaries

[@cottontail5514]

Sounds like thats what his lawyer told him to get good boy sorry points from the judge

[@EmillyOrr]

And we know at this point that he's both, so...

[@blairhaywood7779]

@@cottontail5514 I think we all know his lawyers told him to fake going mental to try to force an insanity defense

[@Skel_fgc]

Por que no les dos?

[@jadaleewallace8566]

I love your name.

[@thomasmarshall6351]

Greg: "This is the REAL me. This is my gritty, realistic, tortured life. " Also Greg: "I astral project with aliens."

[@magnasupreme]

Thomas Marshall that just shows Greg’s grip on reality

[@BlondieGurl1129]

I'm so confused why he chose this book in particular to add that at the beginning??

[@moch.farisdzulfiqar6123]

What a religous experience for a 'legit' atheist, I amazed 😂

[@shinkurasha8061]

I mean he got the pedophile part down which is fucking disgusting

[@justwannafreefx9419]

I mean, "I'm the son of God's God" is... Something, innit?

[@jessthompson4902]

greg: "this book is based off my life and who i was" also greg: "...and this is the part when my chadsona and i fly off to kill god"

[@mikaroni_and_cheez]

All male Mary-Sues should just be called Greg James Daniels

[@sirrivet9557]

Basically he just imbelished every part of his life to where he looks like the good person

[@yojimbo_ejh]

I read this comment close to the beginning of the video and thought it was a joke... 0_0

[@mikaroni_and_cheez]

@@sangopearl9965 on it I'm already opening a google doc. Then I'll post a video of me reading it with my mouth too close to the mic

[@lucaluca3238]

You know when i first read this comment i thought this was just an exaggeration for a joke Then i finished the video Wtf

[@dawnpeltwasright88]

as somebody with Tourette’s I can confirm, we are all aliens. We aren’t disabled, we’re aliens.

[@narcopsy]

Cool

[@lena_says]

Hi, Alien. I'm Dad.

[@Schnort]

Ah yes, your tics are not uncontrolled impulses; they are truly just your inner intelligence, which goes beyond what any human body can handle. We cannot expect a human body to keep all that knowledge within itself, can we?

[@thedarklrd6714]

@@Schnort the tics are the disguise momentarily glitching

[@crowdemon_archives]

@@Schnort the tics are uncontained signals from the mothership.

[@piplupinabasket9035]

I love how this was the book where Greg was openly straight up like "This is essentially about me and my life" and then it ended up being about ALIENS and he becomes a LITERAL GOD

[@cykakyasu8828]

I knew it There is no loving God

[@curryinahurry1746]

Gregory views himself as a God, he has called himself so several times too.

[@runningcommentary2125]

@@curryinahurry1746 Does that mean that when he says you shouldn't pray for your relatives who have cancer, it's because Greg himself gave them cancer?

[@wysteria.]

that chuu pfp,,,,,,man of culture for sure

[@silaskuemmerle2505]

If I recall correctly, some of that shit is stuff he actually believes.

[@firstnamelastname8865]

This entire book is just him having a wet dream about himself

[@Alyssablivion]

this comment made my day

[@cyanmanta]

You just described Greg’s entire life.

[@jirachisob5633]

This went from: - I'm a lonely kid who spends all his time in the woods - I'm being attacked by aliens every night - I'm a furry Chad who is going to kill god

[@jaywoods3889]

The natural order of evolution

[@jirachisob5633]

@@ceo9915 it all makes sense now

[@coqui9879]

AllMight is best girl fuck

[@omegamark9178]

Makes sense to me! 👍

[@patrickfrost9405]

@@ceo9915 No, that's supposed to be funny and ironic.

[@BlindStarLily]

I started cackling because there’s no way to take Greg’s angsting seriously when it’s in the same sentence as, “I would drink my chocolate milk.”

[@tracyblanchard7663]

Onision: This book represents me Also Onision: _Writes a book that devolves into incel rambling in which he literally kills God thrice over._

[@taejae4272]

yeah it doesn't make sense, unless his aim was for him to be represented as the psycho he is

[@uncertain_zee]

Let's not forget his "sythesca" (not sure if I spelled it right but does it really matter?) religion involved aliens and superpowers

[@wolfiegamerhowls4]

@@uncertain_zee the heavens gate

[@goldbergshekelwitz1596]

@@uncertain_zee i forgot about his OC by greg Donut Steel "religion"

[@who_the_fuck_is_riley5813]

@@uncertain_zee It's Sicesca

[@Arkonu]

Onionson imagines himself as an 8 foot tall 11 year old with the powers of a god. Sounds about right.

[@JingleShoes]

Me debating whether or not to like this, cuz it's at 420

[@BarkingFlame]

Dude reminds me of Dennis Reynolds

[@elliest55]

I feel like I'm the only one on here who doesn't know who this guy is (I just love videos reviewing bad literature), but it sure seems like his psychiatrist needs to read this book.

[@apocalypseblade]

Huh... so the Emperor of Mankind from Warhammer 40k?

[@KM-hv1jg]

Jotaro Kujo?

[@alexshorts9714]

out of context quote of the century: “now we have two identical greg-chads on their way to fight God.”

[@taylorbarnhill143]

that reads like a tumblr shitpost

[@AlicesOdyssey]

It isn't any better incontext

[@Dojan5]

Holy shit, spoilers! 😂

[@scope402]

😅😅😅

[@randimurphy4124]

taylor it basically is a tumblr shitpost

[@moonfairy2325]

Onion boy did a lot of damage to my mental health as a teen, but I finally got the courage to watch your vids about him, and wow- it has been one hell of a cathartic experience. What a pathetic dude.

[@artnunymiss2530]

I'm so glad you learned from it! You have nothing to be ashamed of, it's him.

[@EvieBats2]

I'm in the same boat. I think his fake persona is quite alluring to young teenage girls, the unapologetic, raunchy humoured, honest guy that we all thought was so cool. Looking back, yikes on bikes, at 20 I can't believe I ever watched his shit. Hes just a disgusting creep.

[@thedarklrd6714]

@@EvieBats2 "yikes on bikes" I'm taking that

[@EvieBats2]

@@thedarklrd6714 feel free 🤣 it's my favourite saying

[@spencerg5893]

Nothing is better than leaving Onision’s cult and realizing how pathetic and stupid he is

[@connie4131]

Onion: “This book is the most about how I am now” His character is 11

[@hhoch9503]

Madeline Harper Untrue. My three year old godson is more mature than Greg.

[@scope402]

He likes to diddle kids because he's a child inside thats why he's doing nothing wrong. Logic⁹⁰⁰⁰

[@Invisibleplqnetsmusic]

I actually think he legit forgot the character was supposed to be eleven. Then suddenly remembered but is such a narcissist he figured "i can make this make sense!"

[@somecynic808]

*Also Onion:* Oh btw I have psychic abilities and I flew up to god and killed him

[@churchc1ty233]

He's like 36 right?

[@MCShvabo]

Every single of his books is a manifestation of "and everyone started clapping" meme.

[@Bighomie39]

This book is an amalgamation of every bad Tumblr post, the MAP ones included Edit: except for bad fan posts. I would be impressed if someone managed to fit Miku binder Thomas Jefferson into a book and have it make sense

[@MCShvabo]

@@Bighomie39 Never been on Tumblr but I'll take your word for it.

[@monroe8566]

Sam T now i wanna write a book just to put miku binder into it

[@mrpixiledd2489]

I'm just canadian... well fuck

[@Nitrolord]

@@Bighomie39 Please explain to me how the term "Miku binder Thomas Jefferson" came into being

[@sirsalt1493]

He called his nana dumb for believing in god but he literally met, outsmarted and became god

[@bicuriousdirtbikeboi2594]

So would that now mean that Greg’s nana is stupid for believing in him?

[@Love_999.]

@@bicuriousdirtbikeboi2594 thats true

[@theartistformallyknownas2677]

@@bicuriousdirtbikeboi2594 I mean if you believe Greg is god then you need psychiatric help

[@ketaminepoptarts]

@@theartistformallyknownas2677 if you believe that comkent was saying that greg is god irl, then you need reading comprehension lessons

[@monad_tcp]

@@bicuriousdirtbikeboi2594 obviously, who believe in gods ? they are all liars anyway.

[@elliewellie_YouTube]

Imagine how the entire plot of this book would have been foiled if Greg's parents had a metal roof on their house.

[@foxfire9144]

underrated comment

[@jessem.4214]

I have only just started the video so now I’m waiting with baited breath for when this becomes relevant. EDIT: wow, you were in fact absolutely not wrong

[@emilyrasputin]

*Foiled?*

[@joyflameball]

foiled you say

[@elliewellie_YouTube]

@@joyflameball hush

[@janes8714]

greg's god > hates women and has daddy issues zeus > sweating

[@dajacircle7529]

I'm pretty sure the problem with Zeus was that he loved women a little too much-

[@lpSsa42524]

@@dajacircle7529 Yeah, if Zeus controlled his dick most of the greek mithology wouldn't exist

[@ZimLikesPastaAnimation]

@@lpSsa42524 I'm sorry but I DIED at that

[@ShadyBun]

sahmm true

[@TumbleBell]

Zeus is bi right

[@dani-2002]

greg: “this book is based on my life” also greg: “I fly and fight with weird ass aliens while making pancakes with my thoughts”

[@jankcitycustoms]

have you seen the video he put out recently where he talks about having to stop for a while because the aliens are after him. or something like that. I don't remember the wording but my point is he seems to enjoy playing into it.

[@evan-bunch-of-numbers]

@@jankcitycustoms he's playing the "look I'm totally crazy" card to avoid accountability. But it won't fly, expecially when he also stated on twitter than, paraphrasing, only an idiot would believe he's gone crazy

[@androkon6920]

That sounds like what 6 yo's say when they lie about their life to impress people

[@tvtrashcastormemetard1604]

Nue I think he is crazy, just not in the crazy he wants to be

[@callmekremit7147]

Nue half of that could be true 😳😳😳

[@ziashock]

>Hears Greg saying Stones to Abigail is the better version of himself >Recalls Roller-skating into a school shooting

[@venus_valentine_xo]

ziashock that was the first thing I thought of

[@CallUNexTuesday]

LMAO

[@deadchannel4619]

He was wearing heelies to escape his feelies

[@starless1444]

That was my first thought too.

[@onjo6746]

@@deadchannel4619 fuckin hell that made me laugh

[@littlecryptids]

the original plot of "small boy from hick town discovers a mystery with creepy aliens and murder" could have been cool if greg had the ability to form a coherent sentence.

[@b.w.22]

Christ, this “book” is like the literary equivalent of two kids playing with action figures: I go over here and I TAKE THE POWER! Ok, but then I come in and I have a gun and I shoot the bad guys!!! And then I also come in, but I use my mind to make a BOMB and I melt the bad guys faces off! And then there’s a girl there and she’s my girlfriend now! No, now she’s MY girlfriend because I make YOU cry! And on and on and on...

[@ViolentAurora]

The most accurate description how did you coax this perfect analogy from the cosmos

[@b.w.22]

Kyra Smith - Hey thanks! :)

[@rrrrroope]

Hey, it takes a real man to have a hundreds-of-pages-long playground argument with himself!

[@vulcaireh2528]

wow your skill at pretending to write like a kindergartener is pre damn legit. Thank you for your contribution to my emotional feely feelings.

[@b.w.22]

vulcaire h - You are welcome. Thanks for the boost.

[@cjaro]

"I'm not even bothered anymore; I'm just tired." Us too, Teya. Us too.

[@TheCinderfang]

She suffered for us. So we could have a filtered version and not being driven insane by exposure to this eldritch abomination.

[@elleblur5]

Omg I had no idea her name was Teya. That's such a pretty name wtf I stan

[@rx500android]

@@elleblur5 ikr??

[@carsonguinn4829]

i want that quote on a shirt Right Now!

[@Taylor-oq3gf]

Greg: the trees are my friends uwu Also Greg: *destroys wetlands*

[@stegosaurusstudios401]

i adore this comment, from the username to the cyniscism. thank you for blessing my day taylor

[@lime9985]

I'M PISSINH MYSJELF AT THIS COMMENT

[@moonkandiie2273]

I still feel bad for all those animals that he destroyed the habitats of

[@bonnyjimenez8595]

my wiggeth has been snatched from my scalp and has been sent to mars via intergalactical ups

[@richardvaldes3959]

Bruuuuu lol

[@SquiddyHiggenbottom]

It may seem like an odd thing to get hung up on, given the insanity that is the rest of this book, but I can't get over the fact that all of onion's books have the same, nearly identical "I must now save the day" scene. Chaos and violence breaks out when the main character is out in public, separated from his love interest, and he runs away. He then immediately turns back around, runs back into the chaos, and effortlessly defeats the villain. He sustains an injury that is initially perceived as serious, but it never requires treatment or any recovery time. This is always the plot point at which other characters start to perceive the protagonist as a genuinely heroic figure. It's nowhere near the worst, or most illogical, thing in onion's books, but it's so weirdly specific. It's like he's been reliving the same heroic power fantasy over and over in his head so obsessively, for so long, that he can't imagine any other way for a heroic action sequence to unfold. And the whole "run away - run back - effortlessly win - gets hurt - injury is nbd - everyone cheers" is so laughably immature and unbelievable that I'm pretty sure he came up with that specific power fantasy when he was, like, nine. It's so baffling. It's so bizarre. How is he not embarrassed. He published this. On purpose. What.

[@hayden1351]

"Stones to Abbigail represented the better version of myself--" 😬

[@WillieManga]

There was a better version of himself??

[@crownedcrow]

“😬” indeed

[@scoutman66]

Better does not mean not evil

[@valderath7433]

Better half just means the half thats slightly less unbearable than his other half

[@arizonagreenbee]

@@valderath7433 I'd argue that this is why I hate you'z Greg was a bit more bearable, because at least he was just a flat out asshole

[@panpanisapan9399]

'Oh god he's noticed a female.' is a good reaction to all three books.

[@goatlymcgoatface2251]

Decently applicable to Zeus as well.

[@emilydubs147]

Goatly McGoatface 😳

[@oryanstudios2252]

@@goatlymcgoatface2251 and sometimes males too😞

[@goatlymcgoatface2251]

@@oryanstudios2252 Bit rude

[@oryanstudios2252]

How?

[@lalakuma9]

I think Onion's trilogy needs to be studied by a criminal psychologist...

[@blackknightjack3850]

I'm sure a criminal psychologist would feel sorry for him after a while because it's clear that he's too chickenshit to have done any of the edgy shit he talks about. The truth is far more pathetic. The truth is that he's fetishizing this shit and wants to LARP as an edgy boi.

[@erosefleeting]

69th like, nice

[@alexanderpumpkin3423]

I want to be a criminal psychologist, so when I graduate I will.

[@theblackbaron4119]

That aged like fine milk. He's being investigated by the FBI :)

[@gnomeam]

His writings are more pathetic than those of Elliot Rodger and Seung Hui Cho

[@draconiskittensweetie9765]

I feel like there are nuggets of genuinely interesting things in this book but they were executed. Not executed poorly - simply executed. Killed on the spot.

[@BassicallyKiyash]

Reals

[@zinkzonk6254]

"vaguely homoerotic comment about a clone of himself" I-

[@midgetwaffles8635]

wh--

[@jagodakit]

i feel like r/brandnewsentence has been waiting for this entire video because it’s full of things that never should have needed to be said for the first time

[@muggz7752]

Of course he would

[@04whim]

Ya know, there's ten minutes left on this rewatch. And that part hasn't even happened yet. Fuck this book takes a while to get truly spicy but it does not take its foot off the accelerator once it gets there.

[@Litepaw]

Unacceptable!

[@duccsucc]

"This book is heavily inspired by my own life" ~20 minutes later~ "So 2 Omnipotent Chad Gregs are on their way to defeat God"

[@thealchemistking4063]

What’s sad is that I would have probably written something similar, but unlike this onion, I don’t claim it was my life

[@C_The_Guy]

bob Zie how does this guy expect anyone to take him seriously LOL

[@JackedThor-so]

But remember, he is a happy healthy man not trying to overcompensate for ANYTHING...

[@ThePi314Man]

How does one defeat what doesn't exist? 🤔🤔🤔

[@ghostgabe81]

Good god I saw this comment before and thought it was a joke

[@ShatteredShadowXx]

"Oh god, he's noticed a female" made me burst out laughing, my thoughts exactly

[@SsnakeBite]

As a boy, I can confirm it was typical for my friends to hit on my sister when they came over when we were kids, which was doubly weird because I don't have a sister.

[@remyrichardson8614]

Two sentence horror

[@AeonKnigh432]

I can confirm, all of my friends would hit on my sister. Which is weird because I didn't have friends.

[@samwindmill8264]

That's because your non-existent sister was actually the ghost of Bella from the wych elm. Who put Bella in the wych elm???

[@icantthinkofagoodname7992]

Greg doesn’t find his sister’s friend attractive because she’s developed and he likes underdeveloped girls.

[@sir8592]

Heh well shit that did a 180 really quick

[@tiana2180]

Brina Owens when I and a lot of my friends were 13-17 we had B-D cups. onion boy seems to be attracted to that group and target them with video topics that will appeal to that age group.

[@thesalazar7328]

@Brina Owens Yeah, like, he said he likes really petite asian girls with no breasts(Cof cof kids) like Kai was before they had kids, but then he says he likes big boobs?????

[@demilembias2527]

ouch, too soon.

[@dantedare2797]

In the past, he's tried to distance himself from his book characters by adding traits that are cartoonish opposites to his actual tastes, like making the character in the second book militantly anti-vegetarian. I always got the feeling that him randomly making characters obsessed with big boobs was another version of that.

[@FabricatedPheonix]

The line “who’s going to tell Greg about lesbians” after the plaid part had me laughing pretty hard

[@caffeinegremlin251]

@@Jay-pb6bw considering the last time he has written something about lesbians? No, his big boi galaxy brain doesn't get the concept

[@lone6718]

weefs! I read this in Betty White’s voice. I love her comedic ironic and iconic line deliveries. ❤️

[@natstewgirl]

What's the timestamps for this?

[@siphy9335]

Just our of context, reading that before the video, is so bizarre and confusing

[@lannnnah]

@@natstewgirl 51:38 :)

[@xxaannddeerr6354]

lesbian tumblr mom at it AGAIN frying them onions edit: drop your onion soup recipe

[@elisabethenglisch3835]

I want that cooking session as her next video ^^

[@ellieparsons5484]

We stan

[@hiropon2985]

recipe plz

[@markwilson4078]

Let’s have it! 😁

[@lailabuchbinder3309]

Fully do it

[@gabrielavega1114]

48:42 "He was a serial predator" To quote Krimson Rogue: "POT, MEET KETTLE"

[@michaelkeller5555]

Me: Well, at least now we know where she got it from

[@Alex-cd3ey]

Greg: this book is based on my life the book: *literally kills god as an emo 8'10 eleven year old after geting abducted by aliens while astro projecting into space*

[@professionalcatgirl8592]

i hate when that happens

[@isaacq4392]

@śóy For me, it got repetitive after awhile. But I'm glad others enjoy when it does happen!

[@jbones6930]

@@professionalcatgirl8592 yea, it was fun the first time, but after awhile it got annoying.

[@AghiTron]

Hah, I did that at 9, without all the emo. That came up five years later.

[@mothr444]

@@AghiTron this implies you were the lady dimitrescu of 9 year olds

[@Snoogen11]

"Alcohol runs through our bloodlines". Doctor: "Do you know your blood type?" Greg: *Single Malt*

[@planetverez8114]

Kombucha**

[@winterwolf6910]

Store Brand Jack Daniels

[@Therathmataz]

The secret is to not drink it just place the booze in your bone marrow.

[@IceNineThrills]

Jim Beam

[@colasupernova2196]

Ah, hops and barely!

[@macoy3943]

“God himself hates women and has daddy issues” Did you mean...Zeus

[@macoy3943]

To add onto this, the idea that the devil is an aspect of god is consistent to Orphism. Wherein Zeus was depicted as being the same person as Hades. Hades being the “Cthonic Zeus” While Hades isn’t a devil figure in Greek myth, it’s still a common thread

[@thatskai3070]

Underrated comment

[@beep3225]

lets remind ourselves that Zeus was a rapist *cough* *cough* almost all harsh punishements are done by Zeus he was a control freak

[@michael.471]

@@macoy3943 Oh so it’s similar to some sects of Hinduism where the different gods are aspects of the same being

[@macoy3943]

@@michael.471 Yeah! Pretty much! Though in orhpism they have less forms

[@vietnamgamer9490]

“We would hit on my sister” actually felt like the throat punches he’s so fond of. Thank god it wasn’t we.

[@michaelkeller5555]

Okay honestly I was surprised when she corrected that

[@emilyrasputin]

He would never hit on his sister because she was vaguely mean to him as a child 😤😭

[@ahhh7122]

Gregory “I’m not like other girls” onion son

[@ameliafailla635]

"Who's gonna tell him about lesbians, in the last book he didn't have the strongest grasp on the concept" I died

[@quirkyblackenby]

moon milk he really doesn’t get it 😂

[@effeffiagonalick5078]

"Hm, yes. A lesbian. That's a woman who likes women _and_ me, right?"

[@fartballs9]

@@effeffiagonalick5078 lmao ty making me laugh whilst sicc :)

[@dantedesilva2977]

its funnier if we dont tell him

[@unacethethicallypleasing9981]

I legit sobbed when I heard how he treated us. Ughhh

[@villainz2616]

Start of book: I got bullied at school End of book: I have killed god and met his father, defeated the Aliens, and found I am gods sisters son

[@tristanhartup4936]

It's like if in a Marvel movie, you start off with the first half of the first Iron Man but then concluded with the third act of Avengers: Endgame. "Who needs natural story progression when you can get to show off what an ultimate badass you are." - Greg's mindset

[@Dream146]

So really he was right to warn his mother about his Uncle at the start! illuminati confirmed! Onision is the one true genius!

[@Sum1BetrThanU1]

Tristan Hartup at least marvel took 10 years to do it. Onion boy is no Stephen king

[@corvus6612]

Bootleg supernatural episode

[@brokenlogic4021]

because why the fuck not?

[@nooneinparticular469]

I like to listen to these book review videos as I fall asleep. It’s gotten to a point where my cat has started to recognize that the sound of Teya crying out in Onionman induced agony means that it’s bedtime.

[@kyuniverse718]

I hate how much I relate to this we both need help 💔

[@samb3209]

I literally fall asleep to these too omg

[@supernova6694]

I fell asleep to Teya's reviews the last two nights. I usually listen to a podcast. The cats were so confused and actually came to check up on me because "mother, it is late and you have not started the resting sounds."

[@lizzie-g9125]

Imagine “Hi, my name is Kull and here are my two children God and Karen!”

[@kai89712]

Can we talk about how Greg always makes his self-inserts mass murderers. Anyone ever look into that?

[@chloescreations8410]

Leviathan i think you’re forgetting “And Maybe Someone Should Check In On Him Every So Often Just So They Know He’s Not Ordering Any Magnum P.I’s Or Whatever Guns Exist I Don’t Give Two Shits About Guns Really Lol”

[@mailman276]

@Leviathan the scientific term is "raving fucking lunatic"

[@fluffyspend3047]

"books are based on his real life." So he imagines bombs going off in stadiums.

[@expendableindigo9639]

Turner Diaries vibes.

[@mailman276]

@@expendableindigo9639 feel like im gonna regret asking but what are the turner diaries?

[@joseph_robert276]

Hot take: this actually is based on The Onion’s life, but the entire time he was high asf, and this bad trip is why he’s so vehemently anti drugs

[@Steampunk_Ocelot]

He just spent the first 18 years of his life in a single continuing high

E McCreanor no excuse, there are plenty of crack babies who aren’t scum

[@silith7027]

Each and every time I listen to this and hear 'My only friends are the trees', I expect it to be follwed by 'because they can't walk away'.

[@one_smol_duck]

Pressuring an 11 year old into drinking whisky is fine. Showing 11 year olds scary aliens on tv at school, however, is absolutely unacceptable!!

[@murciadoxial8056]

from the creator of "inappropriate to an illegal extent"

[@aishaaofthedays]

@Emily Barclay full fairness, not sure if they count as responsible if they give a kid alcohol

[@fanimeproductionst.v.3735]

*UNACCEPTABLEEEEEE!!!!!*

[@alexhirst8889]

"two identical greg-chads on their way to fight god" i'm losing my mind

[@ihavelemonade5640]

Greg's family: *freaks out and rushes to the ER because of a cut* Also Greg's family: *is in a car accident* this is fine, let's self medicate

[@_trico42]

i think about this comment so much

[@loturzelrestaurant]

@@_trico42 Friendly BUT REALLY RANDOM Recommendation: Sci Man Dan.

[@EJDOLMA]

in the same day

[@monsterbunnybear1]

😂

[@riverdaisy4215]

Also an accident where somebody died that’s so illegal to just leaveee God i can’t stand this book

[@Nerdface0]

This is a perfect example of a "Mary Sue." Finally, a true character study of a "Mary Sue" and why they're terrible.

[@artnunymiss2530]

There's a lack of self-awareness in writing a Mary Sue. But telling us that it's a Mary Sue as if we wouldn't catch on -- wow.

[@atocanboi409]

since it's a guy it would be "Gary Stu"

[@random_boi_5006]

This is like a perfect example of a Mary Sue Vs a power fantasy Like this lands as Mary Sue rather then harmless(ish) power fantasy because of the absolute lack of self awareness like the other commenter said

[@shadie-cat]

Onision: This book is basically about me, okay? It's flat out just me. The book: "I've learned to levitate on command, I've learned to cook food with my thoughts."

[@Fanimati0n]

Nice of him to be transparent about thinking he's God

[@inthegrass11]

he read Matilda and said "but where aliens??"

[@salem-01]

@@inthegrass11 STOP 💀

[@coffeewolfproductions9113]

@@inthegrass11 Its like he read Matilda, thought that he and the protagonist had so much in common because they both such galaxy brains that are too hip for the room, wrote self insert fanfiction about it, and then got bored and just put his God complex in there for fun.

[@keshagriffin3375]

Onision x Matilda fic when

[@mayamoon9207]

Greg is just so stereotypically narcissistic that it almost seems like it's satire. Boy do I wish it was satire

[@amiedaniel1591]

True. Really wish it was fake, this "man" is pathetic. 🙄

[@KeyOfTheTwilight]

Yup. It’s sometimes throws me back that certain people like Greg are real.

[@andrewnovak1390]

Honestly, the main characters in Greg's books would work perfectly in a satire, making fun of edgy 14 year old atheist boys who think they have huge brains and also hate women

[@blazfury723]

Nah, i don't think thats really a bad thing. If it was satire it wouldn't be nearly as funny

[@blackknightjack3850]

It almost makes me wonder if it IS fake. I mean, the idea of him making his best friend himself seems a bit too blatant to be something even he would try unironically. It's almost like he's well aware of the criticism lobbed at him and is hoping that by amplifying it that people will make fun of him even more and eventually get tired of it. It's like that tactic in Rules for Radicals that says you push a negative through to its counterside to win. The problem, however, seems to be that this never works. It didn't work when Carl "Sargon of Akkad" Benjamin tried it and it's certainly not working when Onision tries it.

[@rachel2285]

So... just so I'm clear, the book that is most like "the real him" consists of him being an omnipotent teenager who murders hundreds of people with no consequences, is somehow more powerful than God, and winds up in a three-way relationship where one of the members is literally a clone of himself? Ok then...

[@nat-fs3ms]

Rachel this is telling tbh

[@theresamolina1920]

LOL...I know...a non-stop laugh riot!

[@eyeball000]

i wonder if Kai/Lainey is the clone him lmao

[@cdrom887]

Aw, fuck man I started reading comments before I was done with the vid, and now I spoiled the ending. Oh well, I mainly come here for the fact that Strange Aeons does a hilariously excellent job weaving through the [lack of] “galaxy-brain” logic that this book consists of.

[@nukiradio]

Onision is just edgy daffy duck

[@peacefulleopard8016]

Look at poor Thursday’s expression! He just wanted Æons to read him a normal story.

[@LibertyWithin]

Greg's entire online persona: "I'm not like other girls!" 😂

[@lindseytaylor3793]

He’s if r/notlikeothergirls and r/niceguys morphed

[@lauraevans5599]

It’s true, he’s much much worse

[@janeyjpg911]

@@lindseytaylor3793 and r/imapedophile

[@randomweeb9179]

@@abendrot___8055 yeah instead he goes after those 14 year old girls innocently thinking they're special.

[@LibertyWithin]

@@lindseytaylor3793 So true!!!

[@Potato-uh9gv]

For someone who despises drugs Greg certainly writes like he's on them

[@nigelft]

So his first book -- as he hates people calling them novels, apparently -- ought to have been titled 'Stoned on Abigail' ...

[@crashout_capybara]

nigelft 😂😂

[@HeyitsTom999]

He's high on Greg.

[@spinachsheik3701]

I think drugs would make him less stupid, honestly

[@michael-lo7no]

i am the 420th like and im pretty sure this is my biggest accomplishment

[@shizotypical]

The beginning: "the book is based on my life" The end: *kills God*

[@religiousotaku9926]

Ксения Старцева to be fair if I knew I was responsible for this person I would want someone to kill me too

[@motherofdogs7980]

But we still have Jesus, right? RIGHT? *R I G H T ?*

[@XxCheese69xX]

This is the endgame

[@Sniblet]

*Based on a true story*

[@akaiyoru2681]

He said that we can decide what events from the book were real in his life, didn't he? Well, then I say: Incest Playing with dead animals His siblings hating him His crazy parents Hitting on the teenage girls (stayed to this day) He ate lentils...I guess that's it

[@PeterWhittam]

"Bold of you to assume God isn't Ellen DeGeneres." Boy, this aged poorly.

[@YaamFel]

Why? Ellen acts pretty much like God does in the bible. Jealous, disrespectful to anyone who doesn't do exactly as he wants, etc. etc.

[@quinn.0]

ellen degenerate >:(

[@quinn.0]

@@YaamFel well as far as we know she hasnt threatened an eternity of punishment for anyone who dares to disrespect her, but besides that pretty much the same

[@YaamFel]

@@quinn.0 Bold of you to assume she hasn't

[@minor4890]

THIS THREAD IS GOLLLDDD T_T

[@kittendream6564]

"An alien sticks its finger in his throat" My brain: *thinks of that one vine*

[@ch1vis]

Kitten Dream I love that one! 😂

[@kammieferguson9523]

The witch meme?

[@afurbamongus]

Why is this the funniest thing I’ve heard all day? I can’t stop laughing.

[@kittendream6564]

@@kammieferguson9523 this one kzbin.info/www/bejne/q57KqWWuqK2Sg7c 😂😂😂

[@curlyhairQT]

I'm dying

[@colasupernova2196]

“She’s four years older, making her 15,” “Skipping past the sex scenes,” Pardon me the what? With whom? Who is how old?

[@TheBonkleFox]

she's 15. he's 11.

[@colasupernova2196]

The G-Wing I’m aware? It’s a joke my guy.

[@chloescreations8410]

Nani the fuck? Well, takes one to write one lol Also I just got to the “he would hit on my sister” but she read it as “we would hit on my sister” and I hate to say it but I wasn’t that surprised lmao

[@catsrcool1106]

Why?!?!?!

[@trekadouble757]

At least both are underage

[@emissaryofthecows3389]

Onion mentions that his self-insert is "Far above average height" In court, Mrrepzion is 5'11 and towered above Onion Seems like someone has a complex

[@leestoichkova]

One of many, it seems

[@religiousotaku9926]

Which one?? 😂

[@finnstewart4747]

Actually repzion is 5'10, so onision would be 5'7 at the absolute most. Probably 5'6 though.

[@alexv3357]

@GraffitiTurtle Exactly. What he actually has is Simplicity

[@fuyukazemi]

@@finnstewart4747 dang I had remembered repzion being 5'11" not that it makes a difference lol. He is still sad regardless of his lack of inches.

[@00dani]

"we learn that he is very into girls. i guess just like, as a concept? just all of them?" i mean, as a lesbian, same

[@williambenton6254]

the story is really about him rejecting whisky but accepting LSD

[@FIREROAD1]

hot take i agree

[@trocy3174]

10/10 review

[@Riviwriter]

Onision: this is the most accurate version of my fictional self Also onision: I CAN LEVITATE BECAUSE ALIENS

[@nghtspawn651]

Well, you can't tell, can you?

[@thehermit8618]

Well if thats how Greg really sees himself as, it kinda explains a lot

[@joaogomes9405]

Also onision: this one time me and my clone dabbed on god with our galaxy brains so hard he DIED

[@sorinperez2096]

"I read onisions third book" Well I cant wait to see the third breakdown-

[@sillyd0g]

i feel like i need to hire a moving company to help me unpack everything wrong with the part where greg says he eliminates gender inequality by editing human dna. like i know the guy hates women but holy shit.

[@sillyd0g]

@Santa D that would make more sense, but i'm also not sure i'm willing to give greg the benefit of the doubt

[@thejuiceking2219]

up yours transphobes! fear onion man and his dna editing powers!

[@AoiAriBerry]

So I think the ONLY thing that's true out of this whole book, is the part where he pees himself, and dumps the chocolate milk on himself to hide the fact that he peed himself.

[@CCoffnist]

This entire story was just cover up. *Illuminati music*

[@yasminseow2033]

kombucha time

[@fuyukazemi]

@@yasminseow2033 😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣 this story really didn't age well!

[@AoiAriBerry]

@@wizmo2216 Pretty sure that is accurate, sadly lmao..

[@emiliew5553]

greg wrote this book remembering that time he peed himself and was like "how can i not be embarrassed by this story anymore? I KNOW i'll make it so that i fuck someone 4 years older than me and then fight god (and win)!"

[@zommerz]

"Her haircut is brown" Woah, can I get my hair cut in a blue shape?

[@dmrthe3rd]

Under rated post

[@maxhasproblems4885]

@@dmrthe3rd I want my hair to be a yellow shape

[@16Yashaluver]

*Maya the Siren from Borderlands 2*

[@motherofdogs7980]

I want mine galaxy.

[@zommerz]

Lmao I want mine in diarrhea brown

[@stephenm4034]

As someone with Tourette Syndrome, I can confirm we are all secret aliens who beat people into unconsciousness.

[@gregjayonnaise8314]

Stephen M Finally some accurate representation

[@amiedaniel1591]

This comment section 😂👌🏾

[@freyastuchbery7130]

I knew it.

[@theghostiesttoast8824]

I fucking knew it. But did anyone listen? nooooOOOOOOooooo

[@garrettalannorton]

reading the comments before watching the video is a fucking TRIP

[@jjjuice7193]

"Greg is now spineless..." Me: "Now?"

[@Jas_GO]

Chapter 1: gee willikers I sure do hate bullies. Chapter 20: G O D F E A R S T H E G R E A T M U L T I D I M E N T I O N A L G R E G O R Y

[@SandyTheDesertFox]

-based on my own life-

[@tvangelist]

"I live by a creek" "Aliens Are Targetting Me" "I cloned myself to KILL GOD"

[@Freecell82]

That sounds like Worm except bad

[@skornie123]

@@tvangelist Sounds like Onision is the one who ruins JRPG stories.

[@tvangelist]

@@skornie123 He's the type who SAYS his character isn't op because they have a single weakness (that was an after thought and badly added on)

[@leith9109]

“ *we* hit on my sister” honestly was surprised when you corrected it to “he” i just assumed that’s really what he wrote

[@lilkitty2396]

same tbh. i was like "yeah sounds like something onion boy would do"

[@caitlynnhatch9254]

In this second book everyone says "copious amounts of desserts" he wrote deserts.

[@TheBisexualMermaid]

Same! I didn’t doubt it at all when she said it!

[@artemiswolf4508]

seo Weren’t you paying attention? He went out of his way to established his sister was ugly. That’s how we knew he wasn’t gonna flirt with her.

[@Unyieldi]

Alabama 100

[@ugerwashy]

The sheer terror of "Oh God, he's noticed a female" makes me die

[@nanowithbeans2511]

When onision was born, sigmund freud laughed in the heavens so hard that the rapture almost happened

[@cameronshephard9466]

Why couldn’t have he just laughed harder

[@emilyrasputin]

Bold of you to assume Freud is in heaven 😂

[@TheIronAcorn]

That gave me a good laugh, thanks dude.