Getting safety advice from 1994

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Background music provided by Epidemic Sound.

[@Antigen__]

To be fair, crouching down to pick up valuables scattered all over the floor opens you up to a swift roundhouse kick to the head.

[@jacksonpercy8044]

Or a stilleto heel to the face.

[@kilgoretrout4491]

Or you could just shoot her to avoid getting in that situation.

[@Vrikrar]

Never lower your head to your victim, as they will surely deliver a powerful double axe-handle maneuver to your exposed neck, severely hindering your ability to pick up scattered valuables.

[@lemmingscanfly5]

I honestly probably would boot them in the head and start stomping on them, but I am a man, and a schizo.

[@katc2040]

@@kilgoretrout4491 I think most people don't realize that most human beings don't want to kill another person, even if they are a thief.

[@badrat484]

Purse Snatcher: “Ew, floor money. I’m outta here.”

[@valeriazaragoza375]

Lol the point is though that criminals have in their mind how a robbery should go and if you do something like this to throw them off-script they will usually panic and bail.

[@zapawillie]

I’m not gonna eat money off the floor!

[@nintendo-relatedchannel5810]

@@valeriazaragoza375 You have to throw 'em off their rhythm!

[@endlesswanderer1753]

@@valeriazaragoza375 "You threw off my groove!" ~ The Criminal

[@Samsquamsh]

victim fuckery works man.

[@phyroscire5817]

"Always avoid isolation, especially at night." Wouldn't we all love that lol

[@josefgordon7712]

Triggered!

[@gracekim25]

Avoid isolation…eh😅

[@shabath]

For the time being, please do not avoid isolation.

[@ericbeilmann3649]

Suddenly memories of Ian's Yukon trail review come to mind for some reason: "I notice that you don't have a partner" "You should get yourself a partner"

[@AS-fu1kd]

I've been waiting all day for the night so i can isolate myself

[@pepdog1]

"He just did exactly what the tape told him not to do and he was totally fine; no incident!" what this tape fails to tell you about is the secret safety technique; have a film crew around you at all times

[@Zenlore6499]

“It’s important that you view this tape regularly” Yeah, to maintain your paranoia about Blue-Shirt-Sunglasses McGee.

[@Antigen__]

Sunglasses McGee: He's gonna make all the money now ✅ Blue-Shirt Sunglasses McGee: He's gonna steal all the money now ❌

[@JoshuaJacobs83]

It’s 2021, if you aren’t living in fear every day, you’re doing something wrong

[@danelykins4409]

HEY BLUE SHIRT IS REAL PEOPLE SAY HE ISN'T BUT HE IS I SAW HIM AT VONS ONCE

[@Antigen__]

@LTrain45 45 Who's gonna tell him

[@allegedlyfalse6779]

Blue-Shirt Sunglasses McGee, the cool dude who's hobbies include: stalking and robbing women at gun point, jacking cars, burglarizing houses, kidnapping children, and being a cool dude. Also, he has sunglasses and a blue shirt, which explains the first part of his name.

[@LaughBoys]

Glad to see nothing has changed in the world of safety since 1994. I still wrap my wallet in three layers of thick rubber bands. Takes me a few extra minutes to pay at Trader Joe's but at least no one can steal my wallet and immediately open it in front of me!

[@ElysianAura]

"Quick! Open your wallet and give me all the cash" "Oh just give me a minute, I was going for the world record for rubber band balls with it as a base"

[@nukiradio]

@@ElysianAura _mexican standoff between a robber and a man's wallet that has been rubber banded shut by like 50 rubber bands_

[@BusinessZeus]

I disagree, "Nothing" from God lives underwater has *NOT* changed. I don't understand why you told me how to rob you.

[@user-or6yn8pm3c]

I'd say America felt safer back then than today. We never worried so much for our safety like today.

[@LJMC80]

No to rain on everyone's memes but the rubber band thing was to deter pickpockets, as the rubber band was supposed to make the wallet harder to remove.

[@WCtheComedian]

Dear Police: I'm leaving town for a couple days. Sincerely, Ian

[@joehosier6187]

He has to get himself a fat butt implant in his butt surgery. Cuz butt

[@2yearoldeastercandy935]

Dear police, can you water my plants and feed my cat while I’m away? Hugs and kisses, (signature)

[@breannajefferson912]

It's funny, because if you did that now the cops would think you're about to commit a crime and are setting up an elaborate alibi.

[@StarkMaximum]

"What the fuck, the _police_ robbed me."

[@Remember_Baker]

@@StarkMaximum Shouldn't of left that big note on my front door that said "leaving town for a couple days. brb tho lol."

[@TheChrisHype]

I get the feeling that Ian accepts sponsorship from those who he already happens to have a hilarious costume for.

[@KarmicXRestrictions]

Safety deposit box? I thought I wasn't supposed to go to the bank?!

[@senbrandybuck4492]

You can go to the bank, you just can’t go alone. Everyone needs a bank buddy and a gym coach whistle

[@BBC600]

@@senbrandybuck4492 If the bank is so dangerous but I'm supposed to do most of my banking by mail is it safe to use the post office? This video tape doesn't seem to have a postal safety section. 😉

[@senbrandybuck4492]

@@BBC600 bank logic applies: phone a friend. Everyone needs a bank buddy, a post office pal, a pharmacy friend, a cafe comrade, etc.

[@SirChubbyBunny]

But it's okay! If you make a mistake by going to the bank to use a safety deposit box, you can always go back the next business day :D Wait...

[@Iamafishproductions]

The robbery random encounter is only triggered when you approach the ATM. If you use the quicksave glitch to clip through the walls of the bank furthest from the ATM, you'll be able to access the safety deposit boxes without triggering the encounter. These are usually safe, non-respawning containers, unless you're using the buggy 2008 patch for the U.S. economy.

[@ireallydidntwanttomakeanac575]

"If you arrive to find that your home is being burglarized, use common sense. Don't go inside. Allow your burglars to steal precious belongings that you have hidden in every corner, nook and cranny of the home. Allow your children to be kidnapped and terrorized by burglars. Do not call the police. Just leave the house and start a new life. Just make sure that you have your copy of this tape in your glove compartment"

[@nukiradio]

Home Alone:

[@arfazia3897]

Thank you, now I know what to do!

[@SushiLord89]

This is the Canada's suggestion on what to do when dealing with a home breakin. No, I'm not joking. The other option is to hide and let them do what they want. Do not resist, or call for help. That includes any emergency number.

[@kilbert666]

Not calling the cops is retarded but like... Yeah. The best way to not get hurt by a criminal is generally to give them what they want, unless what they want is to hurt you. In which case, you're already gonna get hurt, so fight like hell

[@logitech4873]

This is what I do with spiders

[@donniemills967]

Ian is growing his hair out to cover his back pocket to discourage pick pockets.

[@salemite]

The advice for being followed is way simpler. Take odd routes rather than a direct route. If the car keeps with you than it isn't just coincidence anymore as no one is going to take a bunch of unnecessary turns just like you unless they are following you.

[@randytrashcan]

Yep. And if they're still following you, start driving to a police station and phone them ahead of time to let them know you're being followed and will arrive shortly.

[@BlueSparxLPs]

Another trick I've heard, along the same lines as the "odd route," is to drive all the way around the block until you're back where you started from. If someone isn't following you, they'll break off at some point before you complete the full circle.

[@Sean_Bird]

I don’t know if I can trust safety information from 1994. If it was from 1995, then maybe.

[@oisinsaxon3054]

"This safety information seems a bit moldy, doesn't it?"

[@p2p2p2p2p2p]

naw man 1996 is where it's at

[@Dexth_Jsm]

@@oisinsaxon3054 I think my safety advice has spoiled :(

[@CardboardSliver]

I prefer Safety Advice from 1997. Much more modern.

[@Arbiter099]

1984 was the peak of safety

[@bleasher]

The fact that I am viewing this video is proof of my concern and acknowledgement of the serious crime problem we are all faced with today.

[@nukiradio]

The fact that he is viewing that is proof of his concern and acknowledgment...

[@Mrnotpib]

The fact The fact that I’m that I’m viewing is viewing is proof of proof of my concern my concern and acknowledgement and acknowledgment

[@nicoledoubleyou]

@@Mrnotpib reading this gave me a stroke

[@asbestos464]

@@nicoledoubleyou stroke gave reading this a me

[@alakazamlover4908]

@@asbestos464 me gave stroke to this reading

[@moetatoes]

About calling the police when going out of town - I lived in a REALLY sketchy part of town. To the point, where I had called the non emergent line to get the teens from banging on my door and waiting on my porch step after 9pm waiting for me. Once I was going on a six day trip and had cameras up. But I wasn't already paranoid enough, so I called the non emergent line and they had a patrol car drive by like twice while I was away. It made me feel a little better that if something happened there was a report that I tried to have it protected.

[@hannatude]

I legitimately thought that “Magic Spoon” was a weird 90’s commercial parody bit until Ian mentioned the company’s website.

[@Samouraii]

I was born in 1994 and I've never been a victim of any of these crimes. Clearly this tape had a huge impact on safety

[@Deoxys_Used_Mimic]

It’s funny because the video never showed an infant being robbed. The video was made in 1994, *for people living in 1994.* What? Did you come out the womb at the ripe ‘ol age of 35? I was born in 1994 and I don’t recall sh*t because I was a *baby.* Those robbers must’ve stolen my memory.

[@linkskywalker5417]

@@Deoxys_Used_Mimic What next? Did the robbers go present those memories to Mansex to make a test replica?

[@Deoxys_Used_Mimic]

@@linkskywalker5417 Possibly, but you might wanna ask the Ancient Greeks that question first. Oh, and while you’re at it... can you also ask the Egyptians why you look just like your Mother’s Brother?

[@Schnipah]

I was born in 99’ and have been shot at once and been chased down by a homeless guy trying to mug my friend and I, so your mileage may vary.

[@RetropixleDS]

"The door can beat the door with the inactive door with the top and bottom of the door". truly, I feel safer knowing this. Thanks moose.

[@nukiradio]

Mappy. All I need to say

[@sethsez]

That bit felt like getting construction advice from Neil Cicierega.

[@SirChubbyBunny]

Someone needs to make a Letterboxd page for this gem and we can make the door bit our inside joke.

[@mn_twisted4319]

I feel like in the 90’s everything was just oblivion npc’s

[@couchmaster3773]

"Have you heard of the high elves?" - Bill Clinton

[@Natalie-qm3ys]

Same with 2020

[@Sniperbear13]

the whole remember the persons hair cut and color is actually something that is very useful, but you want to do more then that, the more details the better.

[@ruby.the.weirdo]

I love Ian's new Hobo-Bohemian style fashion. It suits his personality very well!

[@jrjr648]

_Hobohemian_

[@Its_Me_Romano]

He looks like he drives a Chevy Astrovan

[@gaminglol1167]

He looks like the funny stoner guy that reads the haunted book out of curiosity

[@i_teleported_bread7404]

@@jrjr648 Ya might need to rephrase that lol.

[@YOjeremyRaps]

Hoboboho

[@BenjamminFranklin.]

I work as a security guard. “Maintain adequate lighting” is SUPER important. Easily one of the best things you can do to keep your shit from getting stolen. It doesn’t matter if it involves pestering your city to fix the broken streetlight outside your home or getting some motion activated flood lights. If the criminal can get into your home or business and get away I’m the dark then they are more likely to try. Both home and businesses should follow this advice

[@caty0000]

I read that as moron activated lights lol

[@kilgoretrout8896]

@Courage wrong; it's better with ben

[@robertschnobert9090]

Most burglars breaking into single family homes do so during the day. At least around here, maybe it's different in the US.

[@linkskywalker5417]

@@robertschnobert9090 What country do you live in?

[@kaemincha]

@@robertschnobert9090 Even in the US, most burglaries happen during the day!

[@elizabeth_404]

"Gee, I hope no one robs me at gunpoint today." -me, every day

[@ivangordy8957]

I loved your half-assed attempt at convincing us Magic Spoon doesn't taste like garbage.

[@SuperSisby]

Didn't he have a video reviewing it? Or was that another KZbinr? I can't find his video, unfortunately.

[@ivangordy8957]

@@SuperSisby It was either Danny Gonzales or Drew Gooden... I THINK.

[@StoutShako]

I got suckered in with the last ad he did for them and now I have trust issues. At least they honored their 100% satisfaction guaranteed offer. Now I just have to figure out what to do with the boxes of trash cereal I can barely stomach without contributing to rampant food waste...

[@scotttalkington323]

@@StoutShako compost

[@CommanderViviax]

@@SuperSisby Drew Gooden did it. As part of his buy wierd adverts for a month, video. The Magic Spoon part was grisly.

[@googaboogaloo]

I love that the car jacker is wearing a poison shirt.

[@Belgand]

Just talk dirty to him.

[@TheQuickSilver101]

I completely missed that. I need to go back and re-watch it!

[@crh71288]

Every carjacker sings a sad sad song 🎶

[@Iamafishproductions]

What's got him so jumpy? Why can't he stand still? Like gasoline he wants to...steal her car. And leave.

[@AnthroFox99]

Sounds like subliminal messages of rock=criminal.

[@Wilderness-Will]

Ian, I love that you keep doing these VHS and retro "cultural tutorial" videos even if the Almighty Algorithm doesn't embrace them as much as Brutalfoods content. Thank you for helping to document some of wonderfully weird aspects of American culture from the late '80s to early '00s.

[@aaronjames3228]

I got recommended it

[@Aster_Risk]

I don't really like the food videos, but I love these.

[@elegantdisarray]

I really miss Televoid

[@Wilderness-Will]

​@@elegantdisarray Same! I imagine the reason he stopped doing it is because Televoid videos would net like 350k views, while video game reviews and Brutualfoods stuff was getting 800k-3mil. I understand that sometimes tough calls gotta be made, but Televoid is what got me hooked on Brutalmoose. Since then I've stuck around mostly because Ian has one of the most amusing editing and presentation styles I've ever seen on KZbin.

[@elegantdisarray]

@@Wilderness-Will Absolutely agree. He has the most unique style and quality, I could watch him review anything ✌

[@1MockingJay]

the door segment has very powerful YTP energy and i love it

[@bombgiggity1460]

I remember KZbin Poop.

[@Santoryu90]

@@bombgiggity1460 It’s still a thing

[@bombgiggity1460]

@@Santoryu90 You're still a thing.

[@WillYumLIVE]

I can't stop imagining a mugger on all fours picking up items like velma in a scooby doo episode

[@cheekyghost2284]

Ian is transforming into a 1970's rockstar. 5 stars, would recommend

[@MardiKivMusic]

He looks like he would be crazy on the theremin

[@letharja]

Hes stunning

[@joehosier6187]

That's been him on and off for years. I remember how weird he looked to me the first time I saw him cut his hair.

[@JungleRice]

He has always been a rockstar.

[@T1MAGEDDON]

you mean 5 rockstars

[@Andoryuuu]

The "Comply and give up your belongings" thing makes me laugh because when someone tried to rob me a few years ago while I was walking home from work, I said no, they pulled out a weapon (I live in Australia, so, not a gun, I'm not sure what though.), And I booked it back towards work, but the person trying to rob me was so confused when I said no that they didn't know how to respond, lol.

[@rgs8970]

My friend was walking with a visitor from out of town when someone tried to rob them. The visitor gave them her purse, but my friend who has lived in cities for decades, negotiated with the mugger, telling him he could take everything except for the pouch with her id because she didn't want to go to the DMV to replace her license 😂 she acknowledged that it was a bold move but she didn't get shot -- and she didn't have to go to the DMV

[@kaitlyn__L]

“WHADJYA MEAN NO??” lol love it

[@gracekim25]

Wow😅

[@Potato-pc4tj]

They stopped because they legally can’t rob you if you say no

[@mr.pavone9719]

I (4'8", 85lbs) had a bully (truly about 6 feet tall) in middle school demand my lunch money. I looked him straight in the eye and said "No". He was so confused, he just stood there and watched me walk away. Later that day in study hall he told me he was gonna kick my ass, so I dared him to do it now in class. "C'mon you vig pussy, do it now. DO IT NOW." He shied away and never bothered me again.

[@DarthFennec]

Purse-snatcher: "Oh no the keys and some change fell out of the bag, whelp, I guess it's a lost cause, might as well drop the purse full of cash that I'm holding before running off"

[@manbat1168]

Trust me moose, the amount of times i've seen people leave their engine running while they're not inside the car is too many, they need this tape.

[@ericbeilmann3649]

IKR, every time I see it I can't help but wonder how long it is going to be before their car gets stolen.

[@Bonzapper]

Hell yeah I was missing the Moose

[@xenos_n.]

You don't miss with the mooth

[@RetroAmateur1989]

You must be a very lousy hunter then.

[@justhellbound4206]

broo I fall asleep to your Brutal moose originals playlist every night. Your content is so rewatchable. Best content creator. Keep it up my man.

[@rudeboyspodcast]

I gotta wonder how it feels to have your content be frequently "slept to." I guess it's a compliment that people find it cozy? But it can also be taken like "this puts me to sleep, " lol

[@jonnykanesantos]

Replay value is hard to find on KZbin but I def rewatch Ian anytime. My gf and I always watch his streams before bed

[@nuggetsdad444]

SAME. Nostalgic Favorites is my go to playlist for bed. Moose has become a clutch part of my bedtime routine.

[@flickeringdreams15]

Sometimes when I wanna chill or sleep, I go straight to the cosmic crisp video. Best vibes and chillest aesthetic on this whole site.

[@lizithekiwi]

I defo get a cozy feeling from Ian's videos, often have them oh when I'm going to sleep, like a bedtime story! 😊

[@LegallyBlindGamer7926]

I am reminded of an old Discovery Channel show called It Takes A Thief, where these two former burglars did mock break-ins at people's homes, then gave the "victims" a total home security makeover. This always included an alrm system, and at least one safe, usually by a company called Gardall.

[@lilr8108]

“blueberry. a cereal that tastes of blueberry” - milk jug ian truly mystical times we live in

[@flamingghottea]

im getting ready to move out and start my own life on my own, so thank you for teaching me safety/self defense Brutalmoose

[@trshxgod8040]

Good luck!

[@i_teleported_bread7404]

Good luck, dude.

[@rampageblizzard]

living on your own can be fun. Just be aware of your surroundings and you’ll most likely be fine.

[@lauraanjema7415]

Make sure to call and let the police know that you're moving.

[@jamesseeker2575]

@@lauraanjema7415 That is true. The police are always glad to be called on their emergency line for non-emergencies

[@Cavegeckosol]

These were the "duck and cover" of the 80s-90s. Most thefts, assaults, and murders are likely to be committed by family members or people you know. But knowing what to do when a stranger in a polo shirt attacks makes us feel safer.

[@Arbiter099]

Most thermonuclear exchanges are likely to occur between your friends or family or people you already know too

[@RobCamp-rmc_0]

@@Arbiter099 just the other day my douchebag cousin left a dirty bomb in a thermos at my front door, so I immediately lobbed a water balloon filled with VX at his trick ass yes, technically, it wasn’t a thermonuclear exchange, and I retaliated with narrow-scale chemical warfare, but I’m not interested in collateral damage, okay?

[@Shinigami13133]

@@RobCamp-rmc_0 you've just got your priorities straight! It's about sending a message!

[@eelguttz885]

This also, added with the fear of violent crime going up while violent crime statistics in general dip with police failing to do their job causing white and other privileged people who own homes in the suburbs more paranoid. They can start the whole "there goes the neighborhood" thing again because apparently in America, a real country, you can't have anything without a little racism.

[@darkninjafirefox]

Fun story, a friend and her abusive ex used to get into fights about keeping their blinds closed. He had a lot of video games on display and she would argue that they should keep the blinds drawn so as not to potentially be robbed. Well cut to about a year after they break up and guess who got 4000$ worth of stuff stolen

[@jims7773]

$4000 dam did he have solid gold game discs?

[@darkninjafirefox]

@@jims7773 just rich parents

[@mattpace1026]

@@darkninjafirefox I'm going to go out on a limb and say that's the reason your friend's house was targeted, not because of a video game display.

[@couchmaster3773]

@Matt Pace The video game display is an indication of wealth, I.E rich parents.

[@mattpace1026]

@@couchmaster3773 Dude, burglars are not just staring into people's windows looking to see whether or not there's anything to steal. The majority of criminals are smart enough not to do that, and the ones that aren't get caught pretty quickly.

[@eddvcr598]

14:06 I deadass blankly expected the narrator to say “Once you recognize this bad man in blue” because he’s so ubiquitous 😂

[@5kytar34]

Does anyone else miss Televoid? I think this could’ve been amazing as a televoid episode.

[@RetropixleDS]

It really could of been...wonder what caused it's demise?

[@CreepyboomGamer]

Ian left the televoid, you think he would go back?

[@uhsaywhatnow]

Look around at 2021 and tell me this all isn’t Televoid. Please.

[@5kytar34]

@@uhsaywhatnow Seriously though. It really does feel like the televoid these days. I need to find myself some old movies now.

[@AzizidarkReborn]

@@RetropixleDS So my understanding is two-fold. The first part is that if memory serves, Ian hit a bit of burnout after the lack of success with Televoid compared to the food videos (mainly due to the yt algorithm) and felt a need of a change of content and then didn't know what to do with televoid. Pretty sure he mentioned this on a Nancy Drew or Bully VOD. The second point is that televoid episode 6 (the party one) was in itself a fine conclusion: One where Ian finally escaped the televoid realm and joined us back in ours seamlessly.

[@TheDonTime]

Love when Ian reviews the old instructional videos. My wife and I quote the party etiquette video all the time. Awesome job!

[@CryoBear72]

A lot of these are actually pretty good tips though lol.and you can absolutely notify the local authorities if you will be away from home for an extended period of time. They're even willing to do check ups on the property during your time away to make sure it hasn't been broken into

[@thundertheangrycat9128]

I love that no matter how boring the original content may have been on its own, your humor and editing always make it hilarious

[@jacksonpercy8044]

I'm not 100% happy with how Ian wrote "%100 Happiness Guaranteed"

[@SirChubbyBunny]

I'm wondering if Ian would have fun with the instructional tape about fire safety from the 80s that was made by, I think, the Seattle or New York fire department and McDonald's.

[@amber7591]

The shrub thing is interesting. I remember watching something some time ago and they talked about how it was good to have shrubs or rose bushes under low windows to deter people from trying to climb in.

[@allegedlyfalse6779]

Ian, your ad spots are always a delight. You're one of the few KZbinrs whose ending ads feel like a special treat at the end of the episode instead of just "welp, here's the part where they talk about Ridge Wallet, time to scroll down to the comments section."

[@mfenn7325]

True story: most of the reported car thefts in my city are people not locking their cars ... So some people need this advice, apparently

[@SHADOSTRYKR]

Same in my area, the news had to tell people to lock their cars

[@Thes4LT]

Most people are more insane than paranoids. They are embarrassed to lock their homes and cars for some reason -- they think they're invincible and will never be robbed. It's predictable when, at some point, their unlocked car gets stolen or ransacked. Hate to tell them I told them so, but taking a few basic steps to secure your property and safety is better than being robbed. I still can't figure out why people are embarrassed to lock their doors, but they need to do it.

[@ShokieShoka]

Not gonna lie, I saw the thumbnail and thought it said “Don’t be a virgin, be alert!”

[@VibrationCrystals]

Ha!

[@ah.neat.408]

Being a virgin raises the risk of you facing crime by 69%.

[@jaynenunya6070]

@@ah.neat.408 nice

[@VibrationCrystals]

@@ah.neat.408 I hate that this comment made me giggle.😅😆

[@ah.neat.408]

@@VibrationCrystals I always like it when people respond to one of my comments about how I made them laugh.

[@kellyl3728]

I left the US 15 years ago and watching these videos makes me feel like I’m home again. I love these old videos you do so much!

[@mrrynishi]

Consistently the best creator on this DAMN platform. Also, as a misophonic trainwreck, i appreciate the tasteful edits of eating sounds in the magic spoon ad. A lot of people go for the boosted crunch sounds, but not the moose. I love the moose. Thanks for great content, man. Sincerely.

[@TheActualSeth]

You somehow always upload when I’m sick or going through a hard time, and I just wanted to say thank you. This channel always brightens up my day and helps me get through whatever is going on at the time

[@mandridhugh9555]

dude, that magic spoon stuff is like $10 per box, and the discount code only removes most of the shipping cost so that's still $40 for 1 order.

[@SvengelskaBlondie]

I think id rather stick to the cheapo store-brand stuff, it costs like 1.5$ per box and I can walk home with it without waiting 59 trillion years for the postal service to lose it.

[@thomasdanforth766]

some of the cereal isn't all that great apparently, every review(not from their website which doesn't seem to have the option to leave one)I've seen rates all but the fruity ones low

[@joshitheyoshi969]

Peanut butter and blueberry are by far their best flavors. But $10 a box ain't cheap, and you have to buy a minimum of 4. I recommend it if you're keto and wanting a treat but far to expensive to eat regularly.

[@TheBaldr]

Say No to $5 bowls of cereal.

[@kaitlyn__L]

How else will they pay for all the sponsor spots?

[@ChrisLincoln]

The weird seat belt is the old automatic kind. The part she buckled in is usually always attached to the buckle and it moves forward along the door frame when you open the door. There's also a lap belt. I can't remember the last time I saw one of those!

[@Tukaro]

brutalmoose is the only channel where I stick around for the sponsored segments, he and his Wizard Editing make these amusing regardless of what is being sold.

[@anongarcia]

ian needs to drop the hair care routine tbh those locks are looking particularly magnificent this video

[@lucasgarcia8285]

I remember when Ian got a haircut and now his hair looks so amazingly long again 😍

[@draa0gon]

Your profile picture has reminded me of the importance of dental hygiene.

[@Ghost_Of_SAS]

7:54 If I hear frantic whistling like that, I just assume the local junior soccer game has turned sour.

[@masonshucart7055]

"Whether you actually feel that way or not. That's how you feel."

[@alectricavenue9278]

My health class in highschool was shown this video in 2010.

[@Doci007]

9:41 Always consult a licensed locks, doors and windows This one got me

[@patrickramseyart]

As a wise(?), cowboy hat-wearing man once said... *"STREET SMARTS!"* I'm hyped.

[@learn_with_gern]

"It's not a tape you would show to children" Unless you want to give them nightmares not from the crime on screen but from the musical sting between segments.

[@tylociraptor8131]

YESSS so excited for a new video. I love weird, obscure, rando VHS tapes and your coverage of them is the BEST

[@redshiftthefox]

I'm always interested in these old things. Especially those old drive-in style ads you run before your streams. Good to see old things from past eras come to the present from time to time.

[@ashleytyraisaacs]

…ngl, 😭 women kinda do get actively stalked on a regular basis. Just working in retail could easily get you a stalker maybe every other month. But still, if you drop the stuff on the ground and when they bend down to pick it up, take advantage of their guard being down, and attack. Bonus points if your purse if full of crumbled cookies and and pennies.

[@kaitlyn__L]

Yeah, and if they recognise your car from one day to the next, they might do something to it while it’s parked.

[@mybrunetteheart]

being in retail can make you a sitting duck :(

[@sadcrab9125]

This. My coworker drove home after closing the other night and was followed home. She lives alone. They weren't able to get in before the police arrived, but they yelled a lot of shit at her, and now she's always afraid of closing shifts.

[@BuckBlaziken]

I live in a very small town. Because it’s so small and everyone knows each other, NOBODY ever locks their cars when they go into stores or service buildings. So from first hand experience, I can tell you with certainty that there are people out there who are complacent because they feel so safe in their community that they will not lock their cars. As someone who works with a lot of office works and stuff, I had to watch a video just like this, and it was updated for 2019, most of the information on this video is exactly the same.

[@Owlowlowljohnnies]

You’re the man Ian. I can always count on you making my day brighter

[@baileybrian9560]

Finally, time to stop being the victim and learn how to become the criminal 😎

[@SmashHistory]

None of this matters anyway since Y2K will destroy us all.

[@RobCamp-rmc_0]

That guy wasn’t just randomly running up with a gun to someone just holding out a wallet, it was a scheduled theft. He called first and told the victim to be waiting at their door with their wallet ready, and he’ll be there at 5:30 to steal it. So now you can see that it was very convenient and helpful.

[@Everdistance]

this feels like a video designed to give your grandma paranoid delusions

[@kie2]

Ian's hair was covering the Y in yummy milk so I kinda lost it when he said he was going to pour some of himself onto his cereal

[@LQC2556]

"9-1-1, what's your emergency?" "Uh yeah, I'm headed out of town for a few weeks for... butt surgery. I'm getting a real... fat... butt implant. So... I just thought you guys should know..." [NARRATOR] _If you lose your temper, this may be exactly what the caller wants._ This part was golden

[@kip258]

"Never go to the bank! You WILL get robbed at the bank!" I think you meant to say my Lawyer's Office.

[@Abfallkannibale]

Hell YES! Exactly what I need today! Thx Ian, impecible timing as always!

[@krokodil7057]

Was just thinking about this channel! Thanks for a new vid

[@LARKXHIN]

I love the woman blowing the whistle after being robbed and looking around like “WHERE IS ANYONE???”

[@kdgmr97]

I lost my shit when it got to doors doors lock window doors. I don't know why, but that whole skit was hilarious

[@theosmiumnerd2209]

I'm so glad to see a video like this in my notifications! I was worried you might have stopped going over stuff like this after the end of the Televoid Party video.

[@nothanks9040]

yesss the safety psa content!! this stuff is endlessly fascinating, especially how things change over time

[@jonathanbol3969]

Every video reminds me of how impactful Ian's humor and editing are.

[@PunakiviAddikti]

Some insane people will actually follow you to your house. I remember a story where the writer encountered a Karen in a local store and the Karen actually followed her to be able to continue harassing her at her own home.

[@Akoyabones]

These training videos are always a trip

[@Hollowsquirrel92]

Oh god, finally I’ve needed my dose of the moose recently.

[@Dradeeus]

10:42 This part made me laugh my ass off.

[@zenosama8505]

“The only constant in life is that someone wants to kill you with a gun” -brutalmoose 2021

[@AIOctober]

That was the best segue to a sponsored section ever, well done, ya did it.

[@thecrazycapn]

Ian, I imagine you have a whole guest room just full of weird costumes.

[@I_am_a_cat_]

The purse guy literally shook her purse so everything would fall out lmao

[@sushicat999]

I wouldn't be surprised if that tape is lost media and Ian has the only know copy. He just seems to find the most curious things

[@Critterkid9]

Don’t forget that while some things may not apply to you as a man, they are actually very common knowledge and practice for women. Think the rape whistle, being aware of people following you to your car, or being approached from behind while distracted. Lots of women are taught to yell “fire” if they are being attacked because calling for help or rape gets less response. I agree that the scenes are super corny, but if you are being stalked, it’s probably good information and those people are likely the target demographic. That being said, your hair is looking spectacular, so you might need to watch out for creeps yourself 😂

[@benjaminmenken5693]

These things can happen to anybody, you know that.

[@maccamachine]

i’m glad you document these old vhs tapes it’s really a time capsule the feeling of these tapes are so chill and cozy

[@samicat93]

god the 90s were buckwild. simultaneously “stranger danger at every turn” and “hey you have to actually tell children hitchhiking is a bad idea”

[@absolutely1337]

The tagline “someone wants to kill you with a gun” should be the American motto!

[@moon_moodlet]

I love these types of videos, thanks Moose!

[@lillianjeffers3780]

Reminds me of watching vhs tapes in class with the guidance counselor

[@kylejf2108]

Omg this is great! I needed this. Thank you

[@billygoat126]

ian please upload more! the fall and winter is “cozy up and watch brutlemoose” season for me