How Men and Women Speak Korean Differently | Korean FAQ

I’ll explain some of the most common differences that you might hear between the speech of men and women in Korea, as well as how those differences can sound to a native speaker. This includes changing ㅗ to ㅜ in some grammar forms and expressions, using the 니 or 냐 question endings, the 군요 or 구나 verb ending, pronouncing 요 or 여, using 하게체 (an older politeness level), as well as some common expressions such as 어머나, using 애교, lengthening vowel sounds, and dialect. This is not a complete list of every difference, nor is it concrete as everyone can speak however they’d like - it’s only the most common differences that you may want to be aware of.
Want to start learning Korean? Check out my book, "Korean Made Simple" on Amazon: amzn.to/2bDBi6h (affiliate)
Please consider supporting me on Patreon: / gobillykorean
"GO! Billy Korean" merch is out now! teespring.com/stores/gobillyk...
Become a member of GoBillyKorean: / @gobillykorean
Learn Korean with GoBillyKorean! Subscribe for weekly videos! goo.gl/9Dm5g
Music by Kevin MacLeod: “MJS Strings" and “Brightly Fancy.” (incompetech.com) Licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 (creativecommons.org/licenses/b...)

[@bluecandies]

Alright patreon supporters, get asking for that aegyo video, we’re counting on you

[@KelahCash]

I just CACKLED 🤣😭😭

[@cynthiacascante4422]

You answered a question I had about why everyone in a k drama scene said 나두 instead of 나도.

[@user-yb9wi4wq6t]

This is very interesting content for me as a Korean. We are so immersed in our own culture that we are not always conscious of these things. Seeing it from the perspective of second language learners, which you deal with, must be a challenging task. Cheers from Korea!

[@Avionne_Parris]

This is why I hired a female native Korean tutor while also attending Billy's livetream classes and watching TMIK videos. That way I learn to speak like a Korean female native while also being aware of how males speak. The whole concept is so fascinating. Love the Korean language! Now that I know that 애교 is its own category, I'm curious to know how deep that rabbit hole goes. Guess we'll never know :P

[@lillianpark90]

When I went to Korea, I had a guide that I thought kept saying “부세요“ and I was so confused. Then I realized he was saying “보세요” because of the context. The guide was a male though, and hearing your explanation makes me think he was sounding softer and more polite. Really fascinating, I’m gonna pay attention more to pronunciation differences!!

[@Shrimp8008]

7:34 Billy's aegyo is the only time I found aegyo actually cute 🤭💕

[@hushhush85]

I appreciate your clear pronunciation and choice of words in English. As an non-native speaker, it's really pleasant listening to you and learn something about the Korean language. 🙋🏻‍♀️

[@sobakakustovsky3909]

This explains so many questions are carried for months!

[@BBubblegum-ou5wq]

This is so interesting 💜 I’d always hear the sound change from 고 to 구 so this has helped clear up my confusion haha. Thanks :)

[@douglassmalone-omeally1683]

I made this mistake for a few years learning Japanese and it was hard to unlearn certain mannerisms especially. Most Japanese teachers are female and I was copying them. Accordingly, I'm always keeping an eye on this topic - thanks!

[@snowbie.]

good timing for this video lol. recently, when I said 주무셔요 instead of 주무세요, my professor told me "-셔요 is used less frequently and also sounds more feminine". i didn't expect the second bit, so this video helps address those differences that probably aren't covered in any of the books. thanks! basically, anything said more bluntly=more masculine. not surprising i guess.

I saw your post answering a question about this very subject on reddit I was patiently waiting for the video! Thank you as always Billy, I hope I will be able to thank you in person in Korea one day for all your help!

[@june-uni]

Very useful! I have been so confused hearing girls pronouncing 오 as 우! Thanks Billy💙

[@jaydencarter6250]

I've been wanting to know this for so long! 감사합니다!

[@Fluglecheese]

Great job on this. For some reason this topic isn't covered as well in any educational materials I've seen.

[@BahaariTV]

So, this is what I found> My native Korean friend who also was a teacher told me something interesting about how ㅓ is pronounced differently among men and women in Korea. He told me men pronounce it more like ㅗ when they wanna sound macho or when they wanna joke around and women use it to sound cute. I was always curious about it. It helped me realized why they sometimes pronounce it like o and why sometimes a mixture of aa (u as in umbrella) and o

[@AP-of5kj]

amazing video!! nobody taught me this before!!

[@deb4908]

Luckily for me my tutor is a female. One of the first things I noticed about her speech is the way she pronounces 잘 먹겠습니다 and 감사합니다. With both she elongates the last ㅏ and with 감사합니다 she also stresses the first syllable and seems to ‘ aspirate’ the ㅏ. It does sound softer. The biggest problem we had in the beginning is that I am old even to be her mother but I reminded her that she is my 선생님 and therefore deserves my respect. Actually, anyone who can learn to speak another language fluently enough to teach it deserves my respect. 😊

[@KelahCash]

I loved this!!! 쌤, 감사합니다아아아 🥰♥️

[@fransmith3255]

The ㅗ/ㅜ thing. I thought for the last few years that I just didn't hear those vowels well, because I constantly get them confused when hearing them (names etc). Perhaps it's less me not hearing them well and more that the pronunciation between them isn't so good. This also explains the male and female translation voice on Papago!! I find the male voice MUCH easier to understand than the female, which I thought was strange because I mostly do listen to female voices, but maybe this is meant to reflect cultural aspects? The male voice sounds much clearer to me. Is it just me?

[@ChanyeolsHaneul]

I also notice too, and also prefer the male voice. It does sound more clear.

[@fransmith3255]

@@ChanyeolsHaneul As per Billy, I should be listening to female voices, and I do if possible - "Learn Real Korean" is one of my favourite channels. I also enjoy "태웅쌤 - Comprehensible Input Korean" (who is male, but very good). But, for my Anki practice (I use it for words and also for sentence examples for learning grammar), I'm constantly changing the Papago voice to male, however, because it just sounds so much clearer to me. The female sounds like she's swallowing her words and some of the vowel sounds just sound completely wrong with the female voice. I'm just kind of on the cusp of upper beginner and early intermediate - I understand intermediate level videos, like on "Learn Real Korean" channel quite well, but not everyday conversation yet - so perhaps my listening still needs to improve?? I live a hour out of Daegu.

[@ChanyeolsHaneul]

@@fransmith3255 ohh so lucky to live in Korea. That's my dream. I'm beginner and I'm learning by my self. I live in a Greek Island and there's nothing korean related here.

[@fransmith3255]

@@ChanyeolsHaneul Oooh...well a Greek Island also sounds nice...particularly after a Korean winter... 🤣🤣

[@ChanyeolsHaneul]

@@fransmith3255 only if you prefer to change snow for constant non stop rains. 😄

[@guardianoftime2]

Super informative! Though I'm still a beginner, I'm sure that I would notice something like the usage of ㅜ instead of ㅗ and would be baffled and confused, so it's good to be made aware of this in advance :))))

[@PQRS4467]

Your English is so clear and easy to understand unlike some native speakers who just speak in a flow without any break and it becomes really difficult to catch up what they are speaking.But yours is perfect.I just loved your accent and speed as well,which is neither too fast to go straight away from our head nor too slow to make us sleep.🤗🙂 Can you please tell your accent,if you don't mind.😓

[@agj567]

This explains so much! I thought it was my Spanish/English brain's fault why, sometimes, I would hear "oo" instead of "o"; turns out is their pronunciation. Or when I learned that not even Koreans can tell the difference between "ae" and "e"...phew!

[@GoBillyKorean]

에 and 애 is a more recent change. But they're originally slightly different sounds. When I first learned Korean, I learned how they were different and practiced them. But nowadays that's not necessary to know anymore.

[@lynxyyy]

great video!

[@theblumarc]

What if... Only what if... I speak as Pengsoo?

[@repeat_korean2786]

영상 감사합니다.

[@luckyqr1314]

Might you be able to touch on pronouncing ~것 같아 like ~것 같애 in everyday speech? Sorry if it’s been covered in another one of your videos! Thanks as always for the expertise and awesome videos :)

[@GoBillyKorean]

That's simply a common way of pronouncing it, but isn't related to the topic in this video. When you write it, it's 같아(요), but pronounced it's common in everyday speech to say 같애(요).

[@akiko7298]

So I now sound like some odd mixture of male and females speaking Korean. Haha! Although I do hate aegyo but I find myself accidentally using it with a certain person...and whatever I'm using I just picked up from people around me.

[@athina77lantern]

Love the material on the channel so far 👌🏻 now a question: what do you propose as a korean name for me close to my legal name which means (loyalty and honor)? So far i see a lot on 정 and 유정...?

[@GoBillyKorean]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/pqCtpmWEjrughdE

[@jiniqeee]

Interesting!

[@Gren950]

I've heard that in North Korea, using the ~요 form politely sounds very feminine, while the ~니다 form is more gender-neutral.

[@GoBillyKorean]

I'm curious where you heard that from.

[@Gren950]

@@GoBillyKorean I heard it when I was in a call with another KZbinr, @DPRKExplained . He explained this to me, as he's heard it from a native speaker of standard 문화어 (presumably from Pyongyang).

[@GoBillyKorean]

@@Gren950 The ~니다 ending is a formal speech ending, so it's less about sounding more feminine/masculine but it's related to politeness levels. The 요 ending is more of a standard speaking form - both men and women would use this. The politeness level a person uses just depends on the situation they're in.

[@Gren950]

@@GoBillyKorean I see, it might be a bit different in North Korea but I can understand. The rule might only apply in situations like business or government, but I very well could be wrong.

[@languagelearning-yb1yo]

Awesome video, very comprehensive! One question, with the 구나 would it be 구나요 in honorifics? For example 그렇구나요?

[@GoBillyKorean]

No, it's simply a casual ending. kzbin.info/www/bejne/oZ2veqyIbt6InaM

[@languagelearning-yb1yo]

@@GoBillyKorean Oh okay that makes sense why I hadn't heard it that way before, thanks!

[@leslieskelton2504]

Ahhh i kind of picked up on social media when i seen posts mainly from females, using the yeong ending to sound cute and friendly. Is this also common in texting? Thanks for the video Billy ssi!

[@GoBillyKorean]

Yes, it's the same for texting :)

[@lollipop_bunny2632]

You mentiined that 아이고 is not quite as common anymore...is it these days more used by people who are older lately and falling out with younger people? If so is another word replacing it? Now that I think about it I feel like I don't actually hear as many native Koreans using it all that much (although I feel like it's treated as very commonly used) unless the peraon's a 할머니

[@arawisarchenlandzka3779]

Me who struggle to pronunce 오: "Well, I quess, I'm gonna speak softer from now on" ^^

[@nazeera2]

would be great if there was somewhere an overview of verb endings, their meanings and more used by male or females or the male/female version, guess i have to make one myself

[@GoBillyKorean]

There aren't that many. This video includes the most common ones already :)

[@nazeera2]

@@GoBillyKorean really thank you very much for all the work you do for yt and teaching us korean

[@CyberMew]

side question, i am very confused when looking at the 'board'. how is Billy writing it backwards?

[@GoBillyKorean]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/aJ7JYWZ-ndF4bKc

[@kamj9334]

BIlly I've always wondered. Are you writing backwards? Is the camera flipped? I'm so confused how you're able to write from the other side of the board but it appears the correct way for us.

[@kevinglik]

The video is flipped, you can see the writing on his hat is backwards

[@GoBillyKorean]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/aJ7JYWZ-ndF4bKc

[@sageirwin8984]

I know the camera is flipped but I like to imagine that Billy is a powerful wizard who can write backwards.

[@kamj9334]

@@GoBillyKorean thanks this was interesting to watch. I appreciate your dedication to teaching and making videos for us!

[@kamj9334]

@@sageirwin8984 That's what I always imagined as well! Haha

[@f1content364]

I would love so the a video on 애교 ㅋㅋㅋ

[@lau9222]

8:00 I was gonna ask haha. Too bad you won't :P

[@atishep]

8:01 🤣Fair enough.

[@eelnedroj]

I remember using Lingodeer this threw me off, because when it was using 의 to show possession the male voice pronounced it like you would think, but the female voice just said "ey" instead. Someone said it may be the area of Korea or Seoul that they're from as well, but regardless I've been using the female voice cuz I just like the sound of it better...this may come back to bite me tho lol

[@GoBillyKorean]

It can be pronounced either way :)

[@mandymolala]

Hi Billy... Question... Is it less weird if women use the "more masculine" way of speaking? Because as army, I'm used to how bangtan members speak 😅

[@GoBillyKorean]

You can speak however you'd like :)

[@blueberry9878]

me being non binary taking notes to talk both ways ✍️✍️✍️

[@Stephane_]

I'm a guy and I just realized that I speak like a girl 🥲

[@Drakelett]

Thank you for not making a whole video on 애교 😆

[@InThePurpleGlasses]

I've noticed that to me it sounds like Korean women pronounce ㅈ kind of closer to the Italian z while men pronounce it closer to the English j

[@GoBillyKorean]

If someone speaks more softly in general, it can sound like that regardless of someone's gender.

[@dutchessdreamer4543]

I need some women who are Korean to teach me. lol I sound too much like an animated character. 😂

[@ween9296]

Is he really writing hangul backwards? Because, damn 😅

[@GoBillyKorean]

kzbin.info/www/bejne/aJ7JYWZ-ndF4bKc

[@menear]

thanks for another great video! one note on "you can speak however you want", it's true that language is whatever that is spoken, but saying 오빠/언니 is straight up wrong for men. so it's not really THAT flexible in my opinion lol

[@GoBillyKorean]

Yes, but you *can* use those if you'd like, and they are sometimes used like that. They're just not the standard usage.

[@SmokingTigerDC]

Actually, the pure-Korean word 언니 was originally non-gendered and 500 years ago or so, especially among commoners of Joseon society, calling all older male acquaintances (both family and non-related) 언니 would have been the proper term. During the subsequent influx of hanja words from Ming that later were adopted by the Joseon court and filtered down to the rest of society, the Sino-Korean word 兄 형 was brought into use at this time and ended up eventually replacing 언니 used between men. A 20th-century relic of this can be found in the first verse of the nostalgic “Graduation Song” (lyrics by author Yoon Seok-Joong, 1946), which specifically opens with the line [빛나는 졸업장을 타신 언니께], which roughly means “to (esteemed) eonni, of this glorious graduation”, and is not intended to be directed at elder graduating girls of the singers, but rather being that of younger classmates singing to ALL elder graduates. 형 was also originally unisex in the past. One trace of it is when married women call the wife of their older brother-in-law (their husband’s older brother’s wife) 형님. Likewise, I know of several Korean women who prefer to address older male friends as 형 rather than 오빠 in order to separate them from their blood-related older brothers/cousins. It's just a matter of preference.

[@GoBillyKorean]

@@SmokingTigerDC That's correct. And you can hear that sort of usage (언니) commonly in many historical dramas :D

[@garrykimovich]

When talking, pronouncing ㅗ feels harder than ㅜ because you have to round your lips and open your jaw, so it slows down your speech and is more tiring. It feels easier to say 먹구 싶다 rather than 먹고 싶다.

[@Sqquidd.]

i’m so curious about nonbinary people living in korea. i had the same thoughts when learning about thai, as they both have gendered terms for peers like hyung etc. in thailand, you can choose to be referred to by opposite gendered words kind of like..not outing yourself but it will make it known you’re lgbtq. i wonder if it’s the same in korea, but thailand is more accepting than korea at this point in time and i’ve never even heard lgbtq/nonbinary options mentioned anywhere for korean words. so, yea, i’m really curious how they navigate that lol

[@GoBillyKorean]

Korean does not use pronouns like English. Words such as 그 ("he") and 그녀 ("she") are used for making literal translations of English sentences and other languages, but are not typically used in regular conversation.

[@TheCyanScreen]

​@@GoBillyKorean Still, I wonder how I should, for instance, call my older brother if I'm neither a man nor a woman. 🤔

[@GoBillyKorean]

@@TheCyanScreen Remember that Korean is a different language from English, so you don't need to translate every English word you use into Korean. You can use whatever Korean words you feel are the most comfortable, among the words that are available.

[@Sqquidd.]

@@GoBillyKorean thank you for replying! i had assumed it was similar to thai in using whatever’s comfortable but haven’t heard it talked about for korean. appreciate it!

[@c64844]

​@@TheCyanScreen Here are a few options you could consider: -One option would be to just refer to your brother by his name instead. -Another option would be to go with your sex rather than your gender. If you are biologically female, use 오빠 and if you're biologically male, go with 형. -If you're talking to someone else about your brother, although it won't sound as natural and it's a little formal sounding, you could possibly use the literal word for brother; '형제.' Hopefully one of those options suits you and your circumstances. Just use whatever you feel comfortable with.

[@missaisohee]

i find many korean girls speak as if it takes a lot of energy to open their mouth widely.. no offense

[@tovarishcheleonora8542]

I guess it's not "because it takes a lot of energy", it's just that in east asian countries it tends to be considered more polite from a woman and more womenlike if they not open their mouth wide open in certain situations. I'm not sure if this is true for koreans too tho.

[@phoenixknight8837]

So if we want to sound more masculine in Korean should we simply disregard all female Korean educational channels?

[@GoBillyKorean]

I recommend watching this video first where I talk about that sort of thing :P

[@phoenixknight8837]

​@@GoBillyKorean I did but I definitely had to rewatch the video to finally get it. Thanks for the channel and books!

[@sortingoutmyclothes8131]

I don't get it, why can sounding like a child be flirtatious?

[@paulwalther5237]

Female Koreans butchering the language left and right to sound nicer. No wonder I get so confused 😂

[@YourRyeBread]

me, nonbinary, having to make sure I don't just use one or the other like: 🫨