Healthy Supports - Part 6/9 - Enmeshed vs Disengaged Families

*****
GET STARTED With a FREE Preview to our 12 Basic Needs Course: bit.ly/3UQcWeq
Website: bit.ly/3ybk8Jf
Do You Have Complex Trauma? Take the QUIZ: bit.ly/3QGbzMV
*****
To do well in recovery, not only do we need to find healthy people, we also need to find healthy groups(surrogate families). Tim looks at the differences between healthy families vs enmeshed families vs disengaged families.
Try a FREE Preview of One of Our Online Courses: bit.ly/3UQcWeq
*****
Become a Member!
Access ALL our Courses, Webinars, 1:1 Coaching, Group Coaching & Online Communities: bit.ly/3QIpDWf
Understand the Development of Complex Trauma in Your Life
Online Course: 12 Basic Needs
bit.ly/3UQcWeq
Discover how Addictions are Formed and Find Healthy Ways to Cope
Online Course: Addictions + Complex Trauma
bit.ly/4bbUYsL
Learn How to Parent Yourself and a Child with Complex Trauma
Online Course: Parent Bootcamp
bit.ly/44RpLJ7
Are You Ready to Begin YOUR Healing Journey? Inquire TODAY: bit.ly/3wE68at
Ready to Dig Deep and Learn Tools to Recover From the Negative Effects of Complex Trauma?
Online Course: LIFT Online Learning
bit.ly/4bwZ26I

[@rubberbiscuit99]

I may be older than Tim Fletcher, but he has taught me what is healthy as a good and healthy father would have done. Thank you, Tim. Better late than never.

[@donnaparks1919]

The only support I have is these videos......

[@akacicaa]

Its therapeutic, but its very hard to go alone. Good luck

[@g.s.632]

Same for the grace of God.

[@janethomas78]

I never was addressed as an individual, I was like a plant in the room and if I said anything I was silenced, ignored and left behind. My Mom had borderline personality disorder.

[@eecneihappy]

I am so sorry you experienced that. ❤

[@janandbrian]

Tim Fletcher totally rocks. I'm a fletching!! This man is brilliant 👍

[@catastrophictabitha9351]

What a great pastor. He must certainly shake up his congregation especially families. I should imagine he gets a bit too close to the bone for some.

[@Kieslowski1]

You are an incredible speaker! I love this breakdown on enmeshment!

[@yveqeshy]

Funny that you describe the chaotic family home as a hotel because I remember my mother constantly telling my brother our house is not a motel for people to come in and go as they please without taking any part in it, she was often getting in his case because he liked absconding any chores given to him and often times someone else (me) had to step in and do those chores to avoid the lectures that would follow. Perhaps my brother felt the house was too chaotic for him and that was his way of coping meanwhile mine was to be more like in the first example the one who follows all the rigid rules

[@thinkingallowed1st]

I wish i knew this before i had my children. Hoping i can undo any damage my upbringing has done to them. Thank you for your explanations

[@TimFletcher]

It's never too late to learn something new and do something different. The fact that you mention this shows a great deal of humility and openness. Those are great places to start.

[@thinkingallowed1st]

😊

[@catherine5446]

Thank you for your work.

[@JMSsssssss]

I wish you had spent more time on disengaged families.

[@markbrock9020]

Another great and timely talk. Thanks Tim!

[@KiKi-te9yd]

Yep. I was that partner who came into the disorganized enmeshed unit, and challenged how much power this kid had over her father cos the dynamics were toxic. Super spoiled and entitled, she couldn't bear the thought of having siblings because it would mean to her that she got loved less. Sick. The kid pushed me out, I was the bad guy, scapegoated and left out. Makes perfect sense now. Ick. It was AWFUL, and no changing it. She was super clingy too, and couldn't really think for herself except to be horrified that she was expected to contribute to the rare chore.

[@kimberlykay130]

My ex let his step daughter wrap him around his little finger because he was the only father she ever knew I did see the little girl as a human being I encouraged him not to stop parenting her even when his ex & her too made it very difficult for him But He was still unable to have a healthy boundaries & parent her properly Because allowing her to be able to lord over me in my own home disempowering me Empowering her It was really humiliating He really made me pay for doing the right thing & he refused to do anything as my husband He could not demonstrate how little respect he had for me The neglect of me as a woman as a person as his wife It was unforgivable And I was struggling with severe medical issues Facing surgery on horrible medications debilitating pain I could walk or sit or stand for months He would not help me He shamed me It was hell

[@nichole_exposing_unseen_enemy]

Oh wow! Rigidly disengaged and at times rigidly enmeshed was my family because my mom was not stable and easily angered over the littlest things!!! My ex was a chaotic disengaged family

[@EspeonaSparkle]

Very important topic!

[@donnaparks1919]

I connect with my 🐱

[@meb3153]

Thanks!

[@marialopes1954]

What about families who are divided, disengaged, chaotisch ,violent and abuse each other physical and emotional. Can you talk about that?

[@scouthmk2312]

Thank you Tim

[@jan2224]

100%!!!

[@Chris-yf2zs]

12:40