Hold On to Your Kids: A Deep Dive into Gabor Maté's Wisdom

Hold On to Your Kids: A Deep Dive into Gabor Maté's Wisdom #gabormate #parenting #stress
Gabor Maté's book, "Hold On to Your Kids," offers a profound exploration of the challenges parents face in the modern world and provides insightful perspectives on how to foster healthy relationships with their children. Maté, a renowned physician and author, delves into the impact of societal changes on the parent-child dynamic, emphasizing the importance of attachment and connection in a world dominated by external influences. The book sheds light on the detrimental effects of peer orientation, where children prioritize their relationships with peers over those with their parents, and how this shift can contribute to behavioral and emotional issues.
Maté's work goes beyond conventional parenting advice, urging parents to reclaim their role as the primary influencers in their children's lives. By emphasizing the significance of attachment and emotional connection, he offers practical strategies for parents to strengthen their bond with their children and navigate the challenges of contemporary parenting. "Hold On to Your Kids" serves as a guide for parents seeking to understand and counteract the societal forces that can undermine the parent-child relationship, ultimately empowering them to foster a secure and lasting connection with their children in an ever-changing world.
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[@williammartin9450]

Dr Mate is national treasure! Unfortunately the background music is a dire distraction 👎🏻

[@rosechoix]

If Dr. Maté would just move in with my family for a few years, I'd much appreciate it 😅 and I'm sure my toddler would thank us for it in the future 🎉

[@LovelyFlipFlops-jl9kl]

I agree and I am a grandma raising my 3 grandkids. I feel like I want them to attach but also recognize isn't their mom.

[@andreatorluemke4982]

You are a healthy attachment figure. Children have The ability to attach To multiple Caregivers. Amen. I’m sure it decreases your daughter’s stress Knowing that you who she trusts rather than a stranger is caring for her child Amen

[@janetyay242]

Unfortunately the music is way too loud

[@andreatorluemke4982]

And men have so much capacity in helping to facilitate a non stressful parenting environment for the woman who lets face it is the primary caregiver 99 percent of the time. What you are saying is we have to increase support to women with young children amen. As a society this needs to be less stressed and oppressive time for women as a whole In particular we are not set up for success in America at present standards biases and impossible expectations on women

[@mettebarth-jorgensen7193]

I do agree Dr Matè, but I think the musik is so disturbing, It`s so important what you express even more without musik❤

[@dragica124]

what is the thing with the music I wonder? Isn't what he is saying enough?

[@nancyadams4358]

Drugs don’t treat Trauma as I know from my own childhood abuse… if your a mess bringing a child into your life is so unfair. Let’s teach our young about what and how to be healthy First!

[@robynhope219]

The problem is that having kids is considered a right, no matter what.

[@nancyadams4358]

@@robynhope219 yes I know and what’s that got to do with what I said?

[@robynhope219]

@@nancyadams4358 it replies to "if you're a mess and bring a child into life", etc...bc having a kid is a right, most ppl don't care or don't think about how messed up they are.

[@nancyadams4358]

@@robynhope219 👍🏼 yes

[@lucyceresi8797]

I wish there wasn’t background music! No need to

[@zovalentine7305]

Gabor Mate MD PhD ❤

[@robynhope219]

Ridiculous...he is not a shrink!

[@deepinmind83]

@@robynhope219You would rather go to a shrink?

[@robynhope219]

@@deepinmind83 I would see dr.Bessel van der Kolk in a heartbeat.

[@l.w.paradis2108]

​@@robynhope219 They largely agree with one another.

[@robynhope219]

@@l.w.paradis2108 I don't think they're friends.

[@lindawatmore3321]

When you strive for more success and materialism you learn that you lose your inner self and peace of mind when slavery is abolished from the loan sharks of this world to keep people in a treadmill of poverty that both parents have been forced to work for years now and children come into the world into childcare facilities raised by strangers and no nurturing family members are available for the modern day society is creating more mental health problems and behaviour problems that stem from the nurturing of close bonds with family members parents and grandparents and aunts and uncles extended family members to a society of isolation that has become the norm for children now no longer exist in having a childhood and social conditions that are causing developmental problems in the world today

[@courtneypenhallegon4214]

The background music is terribly distracting. I can’t pay attention to what you’re saying which I’m sure is important.

[@zovalentine7305]

Your children are not your children They are sons and daughters of life's longing for itself They come through you but not from you And though they are with you yet they belong not to you ~ Khalil Gibran

[@robynhope219]

That's right..we don't own them...therefore, we shouldn't hold on to them. Gabor needs his son's support, that's why he's holding on.

[@l.w.paradis2108]

​@robynhope219 You need to read the book. Do you think Gibran wants you to hand your children over to their peers, for their peers to raise them instead of you? Or does Gibran believe parents should raise their children?

[@robynhope219]

@@l.w.paradis2108 I'd assume the latter.

[@l.w.paradis2108]

@@robynhope219 Exactly what Maté says.

[@l.w.paradis2108]

@@robynhope219 Your other post got disappeared. I'll try to find it. I h8 the sense or sheep.

[@robynhope219]

Gabor has a need to hold on to his grown children and wants us to do the same.

[@deepinmind83]

We have an idea that has developed in our culture that people should kick their kids out of the nest sooner. This has resulted in a pendulum effect of generations kicking their kids out as soon as they legally can, and the next generations breast feeding and helicopter parenting their kids into the teenage years or beyond. The truth, as it appears to me, is that we are the only animal that isn't seemingly able to just intuitively know when the time to ween is right. No animal weens at exactly at a certain number of sun cycles, but in a general time range. We lost our ability to do this correctly at some point, and instead of asking if humanity's progression into a money centric system, where nothing else matters except personal gain, has caused issues in our ability to do natural activities, we instead blame it on certain people being morons. I think Gabor's illustration about a plant being sick prompting the caretaker into asking "what in this environment is impeding the plant" speaks to the ignorance in that type of thinking. Our society, much like a heroin addict, wants to blame EVERYTHING except the issue at hand, because we have come to love the idea of it so much. The idea that we are the sole master of our domain, and we too will be the hero of our own story. But the truth is, it takes all of us together to make heroic actions. History has never had a true lone champion.

[@l.w.paradis2108]

I see you didn't read the book.

[@robynhope219]

@@l.w.paradis2108 what book? I only read The Myth.

[@l.w.paradis2108]

@@robynhope219 Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers

[@robynhope219]

@@l.w.paradis2108 nah, don't need it...